What does crossing boundaries mean


What is Boundary Crossing?

What is Boundary Crossing?

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Question

What is boundary crossing? 

Answer

A boundary crossing is typically defined as an acceptable, perhaps inevitable, or unavoidable dual relationship. For example, you may live in a small or rural community where it is inevitable that you are going to encounter clients in the community outside of the professional context, that is a boundary crossing. It is not inherently unethical, it is just a fact of life, and it requires skillful management of those boundary issues. 

Another example is that your spouse or partner works with your client. This is a boundary crossing. You may be at a holiday event that your spouse or partner's firm has sponsored, you show up because you are invited, and then you discover that your client is there because your client works at that agency or has done some business with that agency. There you are in this social setting, does that mean it is an inherent boundary violation? I do not think so, but I do think it requires skillful management because it is a boundary crossing. 

 

This Ask the Expert is an edited excerpt from the webinar, Boundary Issues and Dual Relationships in Social Work, presented by Frederic G. Reamer, PhD.

 

 


Frederic G. Reamer, PhD

Frederic Reamer is a professor in the graduate program, School of Social Work, Rhode Island College. His teaching and research focus on professional ethics, criminal justice, mental health, health care, and public policy. Dr. Reamer received his PhD from the University of Chicago and he has served as a social worker in correctional and mental health settings.   He chaired the national task force that wrote the Code of Ethics adopted by the National Association of Social Workers in 1996 and recently served on the code revision task force. Dr. Reamer has lectured nationally and internationally on social work and professional ethics, including in India, China, Singapore, South Korea, Japan, Taiwan, and in various European nations. His books include Social Work Values and Ethics; Risk Management in Social Work; The Social Work Ethics Casebook; Ethical Standards in Social Work; Boundary Issues and Dual Relationships in the Human Services; Ethics and Risk Management in Online and Distance Social Work; and The Social Work Ethics Audit, among others.  In addition, Dr. Reamer has served as an expert witness in many court and licensing board cases throughout the United States.


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5 Tips for When People Cross Your Boundaries

Setting limits is often part of relationships, but if you feel disrespected by someone crossing your boundaries, it may be time to take action.

Setting boundaries can be an essential part of interpersonal relationships. When you set healthy boundaries with others, you protect your own time, energy, and needs.

Boundaries often require clear communication, such as stating:

  • what you need
  • what you will and won’t tolerate
  • how you’d like others to treat you

But setting limits in your relationships can be challenging, especially if you haven’t had much practice. Self-awareness and setting clear lines become easier with practice.

Others may try to cross your boundaries. Sometimes, this may be unintentional because of a lack of clear communication. Other times, it may be intentional, with someone pushing against your boundary to fulfill their own needs.

But there are assertive and respectful ways to deal with someone who crosses your boundaries.

Sometimes, people may cross your boundaries because you were unclear about what they were from the start. In these situations, the person may not necessarily be trying to disrespect you, so clear communication is essential.

Here’s the difference between an unclear boundary and a clear one:

  • Vague boundary: “I need some space right now.”
  • Clear boundary: “I could use the next 3–4 hours to myself to decompress. I don’t want to talk during this time, and I would like to be left alone in my room until I’m done.”

The clear boundary statement is specific about what you need, how long you need it, and what you expect from others. There’s little room for misinterpretation.

If you’ve set a boundary and someone crosses it, you have the power to let them know what will happen if they don’t respect you. Setting a consequence means that you’re serious about enforcing your boundary.

Say that you’ve lent a friend some money, but after many requests, they still haven’t gotten around to paying you back and are dismissive of your concerns. You could tell them, “If you don’t respect me enough to pay back the money you owe me, I will not be going out to dinner with you again.

In this situation, you’re telling the person that they made a commitment, you need the money they owe you, and if they choose not to pay it back, you won’t continue interacting with them in the same way.

Limiting your engagement in certain situations, where possible, is another strategy for maintaining your boundaries.

For example, if you need to limit your time with a friend, family member, or significant other, this may help show them that you won’t tolerate disrespect.

Choosing to limit engagement may involve spending less time with someone, ending conversations that aren’t going anywhere, or even going no contact.

If you’re in a dangerous situation where limiting your engagement isn’t possible, you can reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or text START to 88788.

It may also be helpful to find a therapist to help you work through the situation and create a safety plan.

If you’re consistently saying yes to things you want to say no to, this may mean that it’s time for you to set a limit.

Being persistent and holding your boundaries firm when someone tries to cross a line communicates that you respect yourself.

On the other hand, if you give in when someone disrespects your boundaries, you let them know that it’s OK to cross that line.

A 2020 cross-sectional study out of the Netherlands suggests that people with blurred work-life boundaries experience burnout and emotional exhaustion. The people in this particular study also participated in fewer healthy lifestyle behaviors when poor work boundaries were involved.

If you’re dealing with a boss or supervisor who doesn’t respect your work-life balance, being persistent and straightforward with them may be one way to avoid exhaustion and burnout.

For example, if they aren’t respecting your work hours, you could say, “I can’t respond to emails after 5 p.m., as I’m off the clock. I’m happy to deal with any emails sent after that time when I get into work the next day.”

Your supervisor may push back against the boundary in this situation, but it’s important to stand firm. If you don’t respect your time, your supervisor won’t, either.

Calm communication with someone pushing your boundaries shows that you can hold space for yourself without acquiescing to something you don’t want.

One way to practice this is by using “I” statements. For example, “I feel angry when you speak to me like that. If you continue to yell at me, I’ll have to end this phone call.”

When you use an “I” statement, try to communicate calmly and assertively.

It may feel overwhelming when you begin to set boundaries with others. It’s tough to make space for your own needs if you’ve never tried before. Placing those limits, especially when others don’t agree with them, may make you feel selfish, guilty, or ashamed.

One tip for dealing with these overwhelming emotions is to remind yourself that boundaries are an essential part of healthy relationships. In addition, it may be helpful to remember why you need to set the limit in the first place.

Healthy boundaries help you maintain your sense of identity and protect your energy. It gets easier with practice!

For more information about setting boundaries, check out this guide from The Self-Help Alliance.

Border crossing questions - Police and Border Guard Board

What is the difference between the external and internal borders?

People wishing to cross the external border must cross it only through border crossings open to international traffic during their established opening hours. Crossing the external border not through the border checkpoint or not during its opening hours is considered illegal crossing of the state border.

A valid travel document (passport) is required to cross the external border.

See more: Estonian border crossings open to international traffic.

A person can cross the internal border anywhere without going through border control. Despite the fact that there are no border controls at internal borders, a person is required to carry an identity document (identity card or passport).

With what document can I cross the external border?

A valid travel document (passport) is required to cross the external border.

The travel documents of Estonian citizens are:

  • citizen's passport
  • diplomatic passport
  • sailor's service record
  • certificate of return to Estonia.

Travel documents issued to foreigners by the Republic of Estonia are:

In case of loss, theft or expiration of the travel document while abroad, the foreign representative office of Estonia (embassy, ​​consul) issues a person a temporary travel document, which is a certificate of return issued to an Estonian citizen.

An alien residing in the Republic of Estonia on the basis of a residence permit, holding an alien's passport, a temporary travel document or a refugee travel document, is issued a return permit.

The above documents are intended for returning to Estonia, and an unfinished trip cannot be continued on the basis of them. When returning to Estonia, the return certificate/return permit at the border is accepted by police officials for safekeeping.

Do I need a visa to enter Estonia?

Information on visa-free travel can be found on the website of the Estonian Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

What documents do I need to have when crossing the external border?

A valid travel document (passport) is required to cross the external border. The travel document of third-country nationals must be valid for at least three months after the planned date of departure from the territory of the Member States, and the document has been issued within the last ten years (Article 5 of the Schengen Regulations).

An alien crossing the state border must have a valid travel document of a foreign state or an international organisation, a travel document of an alien issued by the Republic of Estonia or a return permit, which contains data on a visa or residence permit, unless otherwise provided by law or an international agreement. The data of a residence permit shall not be included in the travel document of a foreign state or an international organization if, when crossing the state border, in addition to the said documents, the alien also presents a valid identity card (ID-card) or a residence permit card issued by the Republic of Estonia.

When leaving Estonia, an Estonian citizen must have a valid travel document when crossing the external border. When entering Estonia, an Estonian citizen, when crossing the external border, must have a valid travel document, a certificate of return or another document stipulated by an international agreement for visiting a foreign state.

When entering Estonia, crossing the border is also allowed for an Estonian citizen who does not have the above document, if his identity and citizenship are proven on the basis of other documents.

What documents must a driver of a vehicle have when leaving Estonia?

When crossing the state border in a car or truck with a registered mass of up to 3500 kg, the driver must have: trailer or a copy of the trailer's registration certificate certified by the issuing agency NB! Regardless of the type of motor vehicle, when crossing the border, only the registration certificate is recognized, and not a copy of it.

  • if the driver wishes to leave Estonia for a country that is not a member of the European Union in a car or truck registered in Estonia with a registered mass of up to 3500 kg and his name is not entered in the vehicle registration certificate as a vehicle user, then in addition to the above documents the driver must have a written consent issued by the owner of the car to use the car. Written consent is not required if the driver is accompanied by the owner or a person entered in the registration certificate as a user.
  • A written consent replaces a contract for the use of a motor vehicle if the owner and lessor of the motor vehicle is a legal entity entered in the Estonian commercial register whose statutory activity is renting, leasing or leasing motor vehicles.
  • The written consent to use the motor vehicle and its trailer must contain the following data:

    • place and date of the written consent
    • name and address of the owner of the motor vehicle and its trailer
    • make and model of the motor vehicle or its trailer, designation of the manufacturer
    • number of the registration certificate and state registration plate certificate, date of birth or personal code of the vehicle user
    • validity of the written consent
    • the signature of the owner on the written consent must be officially or notarized
    • Compulsory motor third party liability insurance policy.
    What documents must the owner of a recreational craft have when leaving Estonia?

    The owner of a small size boat must have:

    • a valid travel document
    • a certificate for the right to drive a small size boat
    • a registration certificate of a small size boat
    • list of passengers (list of persons on board a small size boat).

    According to the legislation in force in the Republic of Estonia, the passenger list (crew list) is a ship's document.

    The driver of a recreational craft coming from a third country is obliged to provide the police officers with a list of people on the boat (passengers).

    How do minors cross the external border?

    Requirements for the documents of minors crossing the state border:

    In the European Union (EU), when crossing the external border, the same requirements apply for documents of children as for adults, i.e. in the European Union and the countries of the Schengen area, the principle “each person has his own travel document”. Documentation requirements for minors do not apply from EU member states to the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and Ireland. These requirements also do not apply to travel documents issued by countries outside the European Union.

    According to the legislation in force in Estonia, additional documents (powers of attorney) are not required to cross the Estonian state border, however, based on the limited legal capacity of a minor, the border control officer can check at the border whether the consent of his parent (legal representative) is present. The parent may provide their consent in a simple written form. Border services of other states may also require additional documents. Therefore, we recommend that you give the minor child a handwritten permission with you, which contains the contact details of the parents, and before traveling abroad, contact the foreign representation of the state of destination and clarify the requirements for documents.

    An alien under the age of 15 does not have to carry a travel document if he/she enters Estonia, stays in Estonia and leaves Estonia accompanied by a person whose travel document contains his/her name and surname, date of birth, data about a visa, residence permit or right of residence (if a visa obligation, obligation to obtain a residence permit or right of residence applies to an alien in Estonia) and a photograph. The photograph must not be included in the accompanying person's travel document if the minor is under 7 years of age. Data on the residence permit or right of residence shall not be included in the travel document of the accompanying person if the minor has a valid identity card (ID-card) issued by the Republic of Estonia or a document confirming the residence permit.

    An alien minor who does not have a legal basis or a valid travel document to enter Estonia and who wishes to apply for asylum in Estonia or a residence permit as a person in need of temporary protection is allowed to enter Estonia after being presented to a police agency applying for asylum or residence permit as a person in need of temporary protection.

    If a minor travels with an accompanying person, it is checked whether the accompanying person has parental responsibility for the minor. To facilitate control, it is recommended that you carry documents proving your rights to parental care. When leaving Estonia, a certified permission of the second parent at the border is not required. However, we draw your attention to the fact that it may be required at the transit border and / or at the border of the state of destination, therefore, before starting the trip, be sure to contact the foreign representation of the state that you are transiting and / or the state of destination for more accurate information.

    What to do if the child has been taken away or is planned to be taken away to live in a foreign country without the consent of the other parent?

    Parents often turn to the Police and Border Guard Board with a request to prevent the second parent from moving their child to live in a foreign country. Based on the Law on the Family, parents have equal rights of custody in relation to the child, but if the parent represents the child independently, then the consent of the other parent is assumed. An e-mail or a phone call to the Police and Border Guard Board is not sufficient grounds for the Police and Border Guard Board to prevent the child from crossing the border if the child is traveling with the other parent. Parents of a child should also take into account the fact that after Estonia joined the Schengen visa area, border controls at internal borders (including on domestic flights and passenger ships between member countries) have been abolished. Persons pass through border control if they cross an external border (i.e. go to a third country).

    If one of the parents wishes to prevent (does not give consent) the transfer/resettlement of the child to another state and the parents cannot reach an agreement, then the court should be contacted to resolve the problem. Taking a child to another state without the consent of the other parent is not a solution to the problem. In the course of the subsequent legal proceedings on the right to custody of the child, this may not only become a basis for deprivation of the right to meet with their children, but in certain cases lead to real punishment for the parent (if a child under 16 years of age is taken to a foreign country or is kept there without the consent of person having custody of the child, the provisions of the Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction will apply).

    To avoid further problems, parents should decide on the right of custody of the child before taking the child to live in a foreign country.

    If the child has already been taken to a foreign country, then the Estonian Ministry of Justice should be contacted for help by phone +372 6 208 183 or by e-mail .... The Ministry of Justice first of all establishes the whereabouts of the child and assists in concluding a settlement agreement. First of all, they try to reach an agreement with the second parent on the voluntary return of the child or resolve the situation out of court. If such actions do not bring results, legal proceedings are initiated to return the child.

    See additional educational films:

    • Abduction of a child by a parent
    • Cross-border rights of custody and visitation of a child in the EU

    Recommendations of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs:

    • Travel wisely
    stay on its territory?

    Legal grounds for the stay of a foreigner in Estonia:

    • visa issued by the competent authority of Estonia
    • a visa issued by the competent authority of a member state of the Schengen Convention, if the conditions of the visa do not exclude the right to stay in Estonia
    • the right to stay in Estonia arising directly from an international agreement visa waiver
    • right or obligation to stay in Estonia arising directly from a law, judicial or administrative act
    • a residence permit issued by the competent authority of a Member State of the Schengen Convention, and
    • a diplomatic or service card issued by the Ministry of Foreign Affairs for personnel of a foreign diplomatic mission and consular office, representative office of an international organization, their family members and private staff accredited in Estonia.

    General provisions on the legal status of an alien after the end of the legal basis for staying in Estonia upon arrival at the border crossing point.

    Which countries can you travel to without a visa with an Estonian alien's passport?

    The visa-free regime is valid for persons of undetermined citizenship residing in Estonia who have an alien's passport and a residence permit in Estonia. See the website of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

    In what cases can a police officer refuse to let a foreigner into Estonia?

    A police officer has the right to prevent entry into the territory of the state if:

    • a foreigner violates the border regime or customs regulations
    • the foreigner refuses to provide information about himself and the purpose of his trip at the border checkpoint
    • the foreigner does not have sufficient funds to cover the costs of staying in Estonia and leaving Estonia, and there is no host party that would cover these costs.
    • the foreigner does not have the required health insurance policy
    • the foreigner poses a threat to public order, internal security, public health or international relations of one or more EU member states
    • in other cases provided for by Estonian legal acts.
    What questions can be asked to a person crossing an external border?

    At the external border, police officials can ask any questions about the purpose of the trip, funds for stay and accommodation, etc. and require the production of documents confirming the answers.

    Where can I find information about queues at the border?

    Information about queues at the border can be found in the GoSwift border queue booking tool.

    What restrictions are placed on the import of goods?

    Information on restrictions and prohibitions regarding the goods imported by a passenger can be found on the website of the Estonian Tax and Customs Board.

    Rules for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation \ ConsultantPlus

    The validity of the document is limited to November 1, 2026. This document is included in the list of legal acts that are not subject to the requirement to cancel from 01/01/2021, established by the Federal Law of 07/31/2020 N 247-FZ.

    Rules for crossing the state border

    of the Russian Federation

    Crossing the state border of the Russian Federation by aircraft when performing international flights outside the air corridors, except for the cases specified in paragraph 96 of these Federal Rules, is allowed only with the permission of the Government of the Russian Federation.

    When performing international flights on air traffic service routes open for international flights, the air corridor for overflight of the state border of the Russian Federation is a part of the airspace at the intersection of the air traffic service route with the line of the state border of the Russian Federation.

    86. The parameters of the air corridor for the passage of the state border of the Russian Federation in height and width correspond to the parameter of the air traffic service route.

    The air corridor of the state border of the Russian Federation is designated by the geographical coordinates of the point of intersection of the axis of the air traffic services route with the line of the state border of the Russian Federation.

    87. The basis for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation when performing international flights is a permit to use the airspace of the Russian Federation, issued in accordance with the procedure established by clause 120 of these Federal Rules.

    (clause 87 as amended by Decree of the Government of the Russian Federation of 05.09.2011 N 743)

    (see the text in the previous edition)

    over the high seas, is the permission to use the airspace.

    89. When performing an international flight, the crew of a Russian aircraft equipped with a state radar identification system, being over the adjacent territory, must turn on the state radar identification equipment at least 10 minutes before crossing the state border of the Russian Federation.

    When Russian aircraft are flying in airspace over the open sea, the state radar identification equipment is switched off when the aircraft moves away from the coastline of the Russian Federation at a distance of 400 km and is switched on when it approaches the coastline of the Russian Federation at the same distance.

    90. At least 10 minutes before crossing the state border of the Russian Federation, the aircraft crew is obliged to inform the appropriate air traffic services (flight control) body of their flight number (radio call sign of the aircraft commander, state and registration identification marks), location, flight level (altitude) and estimated time of crossing the state border of the Russian Federation.

    If there are communication channels between the air traffic service unit (flight control) and the air traffic service unit of the neighboring state, the conditions for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation are agreed between the air traffic service unit (flight control) and the air traffic service unit of the neighboring state. The conditions for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation are communicated to the crew of the aircraft.

    The crew of an aircraft that has received the conditions for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation shall report to the air traffic service (flight control) body only the actual time of crossing the state border of the Russian Federation and the flight level (altitude) of the flight.

    91. The air traffic services (flight control) authority immediately transmits information on the estimated time of crossing the state border of the Russian Federation by an aircraft, its flight number (radio call sign of the aircraft commander, state and registration identification marks) and the flight level (altitude) of the flight to the authority air defense.

    92. In the absence of confirmation from the air defense authority for the crossing of the state border of the Russian Federation by an aircraft performing an international flight, the air traffic services (flight control) authority prohibits the aircraft crew from flying into the airspace of the Russian Federation and informs the main center of the Unified System about this.

    Upon receipt of confirmation from the air defense authority for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation, the air traffic services (flight control) authority confirms (if necessary changes) the flight level (altitude) and the estimated time of crossing the state border of the Russian Federation to the aircraft crew.

    93. If there are differences in the separation systems adopted in the Russian Federation and in a state adjacent to the Russian Federation, the level change must be completed 30 km before crossing the state border of the Russian Federation (the border of the zone of the Unified System over the open sea), unless otherwise provided for by international treaties (agreements) and there are no other instructions from the air traffic services (flight control) authorities.

    94. If an aircraft performing an international flight, after crossing the state border of the Russian Federation, cannot continue the flight and the crew of the aircraft decided to proceed to the departure aerodrome, then the crossing of the state border of the Russian Federation in the opposite direction is carried out, as a rule, according to the same air traffic services route or flight route. The air traffic services (flight control) body informs the aircraft crew of the conditions for the flight and crossing the state border of the Russian Federation and informs the air defense body about this.

    95. Crossing by an aircraft of the state border of the Russian Federation without radio communication is prohibited, except for the case when the failure of radio communication occurred in flight after the crew of the aircraft received the conditions for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation. If the aircraft crew decides to proceed to the departure aerodrome, then the crossing of the state border of the Russian Federation in the opposite direction is carried out along the same air traffic service route, the flight route with a passing flight level.

    96. It is not a violation of the rules for crossing the state border of the Russian Federation for forced entry into the airspace of the Russian Federation of aircraft in the event of an accident, a natural disaster that threatens the safety of an aircraft, the delivery of rescued people, the provision of urgent medical assistance to a crew member or passengers, as well as in force of other extraordinary circumstances.


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