Affair getting over

Affair Recovery | How to get over cheating – Dr. Wyatt Fisher

I'm going to talk about the highly sensitive topic of affair recovery. Research shows around 50% of all marriages will experience infidelity on some level over the course of their relationship. In my private practice at least half of all the couples I work with are recovering from infidelity and they want help with "how to get over cheating." But before going further, let me define my terms.

What is affair recovery?

Affair recovery is the process of healing a relationship mentally, emotionally, and physically after it has experienced infidelity. Affair recovery usually takes anywhere from six months to two years and is often a painful process yet a possible one for couples who possess humility, compassion, and tenacity.

An affair can be anywhere from an emotional affair all the way to a sexual affair. The emotional affair is when you develop an inappropriately close emotional attachment with someone other than your spouse and that person becomes your best friend, your soul mate. You share everything with them and you start falling in love with them. With an emotional affair, it's usually just a matter of time before it turns sexual unless it's stopped. Obviously, a sexual affair is when there's sexual contact. Emotional affairs are usually more difficult to recover from instead of one night stands because of the attachment. In an emotional affair, a strong attachment has formed, which can be hard to break. In contrast, a one night stand often involves little to no attachment so is much easier to break.

All forms of affairs are highly traumatic to marriages across the globe. The number one thing that rocks the foundation of security in a relationship is infidelity. No matter what language you speak, no matter what color of your skin, no matter what ethnicity or cultural background, infidelity rocks the foundation of relationships like nothing else. The betrayed partner usually develops symptoms akin to PTSD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, because of the massive pain and loss of control. A lot of the symptoms can include intrusive thoughts, irritability, panic attacks, flashbacks, feeling numb to life, etc. The following steps are designed to help your relationship heal.

Get Our Leading Affair Recovery Program For Healing and Hope!

Step One- Cease all contact

The first step is you have to stop all contact with the person you've had the affair with. That may require a variety of things. Depending on your situation, this may include quitting your job, moving to a different neighborhood or state, changing churches, etc. You have to cut out all contact with the affair person because if you don't, the affair will linger. A lot of people are under the misconception that they can stop the affair but still be friends with the person or still see them once in awhile. That is impossible. An affair is an addiction. The feel good chemicals in your brain were low because of things going on in your life and your marriage. Then, this person came around and met your needs and flooded your brain with feel good chemicals, which turned them into an addiction. Just like any type of addiction, whether it's heroin or cocaine or whatever, if you get around it, you're going to fall back into it. Likewise with affairs. If you've had an affair with somebody, that person has become your addiction so if you come in contact with them on any level, most likely you're going to fall right back into the affair. In addition, each time you have repeated contact with the affair person it will retraumatize your spouse and all healing in your marriage will be lost.

If you're the betrayed partner reading this and your partner won't end all contact with their lover, your first round of offense is to expose the affair to all your family and friends, which creates social pressure for your partner to end it. The intent is not to shame your partner but to have trusted family & friends confront them about their hurtful behavior to snap them back into reality. When you're in an affair, you often don't realize how devastating your behavior is because you're living a fantasy. If that social pressure doesn't make your partner end all contact with their lover, your next move should be separation with zero contact until your partner can prove they have no more contact with their lover. This is important for two reasons. First, it allows you to establish a boundary so you're not continually emotionally abused by your partner's ongoing contact with their lover. Second, it gives your partner a chance to see what life without you would be like. If after 3-6 months your partner still hasn't ended all contact with their lover then proceed with divorce.

Also, it's important for the wayward partner to take an STD test in case they contracted something during the affair. It's important for the betrayed partner to go with them for the results to hear it firsthand. This should be required even if the wayward partner promises it was only an emotional affair and nothing physical happened. You don't want to take any chances. The only thing worse than recovering from an affair is also getting an STD from your partner because of their affair.

Step Two- Open all accounts

Step number two is you have to share all accounts and your phone with your partner to show you have no more contact with your lover. This is also recommended for couples where there's been no infidelity to foster trust and transparency. It communicates, I have nothing to hide. You have to voluntarily give your phone over whenever your spouse desires it. You've broken trust. To earn that trust back, you have to open up all accounts. Sometimes it can be tempting to have secret accounts. But if you really want your marriage to recover, there's no point in having any secrets. You have to turn it all over. It will help your betrayed spouse slowly start trusting you again because at this point your word means nothing. You've broken trust, you've lied. What you say doesn't matter. Your actions are what matters. Voluntarily opening up all accounts and sharing your phone with your partner will help them start to heal. They can't start the healing journey until they know you have no more contact with your lover. Practicing openness also helps the wayward partner because affairs thrive in secrecy. Therefore, if there's no opportunity for it to grow in secrecy it will eventually die.

If your partner refuses or is angry about sharing all accounts and their phone to prove they have no more contact with their lover remember the two steps of offense above. Expose the affair to all friends and family to create social pressure and if that's not enough for them to cooperate get a separation until they do. If your partner is angry or resistant about sharing everything with you it's probably because they are trying to stay in touch with their lover and don't want to end it.

One way to think about affairs is the person who steps outside the marriage and has the affair, that's 100% their fault. However, the climate in the marriage that made them susceptible to stepping outside the marriage is usually both partner's fault.

Step Three- Show remorse

Step three is you have to show sincere remorse. If you've had an affair then act indifferent toward the impact it's had on your spouse, recovery is not possible. You have to take ownership for how devastating this has been to your relationship. Even if you were unhappy, even if your needs weren't being met, you broke your vows to your spouse and betrayed them. Therefore, it's critical to take ownership for how much you have rocked the foundation of your marriage. Heartfelt remorse for having the affair is paramount. If you don't take ownership for the affair and aren't remorseful, it's going to be next to impossible for your partner to forgive you.

Step Four - Process the hurts

Step four is processing through your hurts, which may go both directions. Obviously the betrayed spouse is going to have a lot of hurt they'll need to express. But the wayward partner may also have hurts because perhaps one of the reasons they had the affair is their needs were unmet repeatedly for years despite their frequent complaints. So both of you need a method to get out your hurts. I teach couples a conflict resolution method called the reunite tool, which is a set of guidelines on how to keep conversations safe. When the hurt is not fully vented and released, it will come out in destructive ways through yelling, harsh comments, and contemptuous remarks, which will only make matters worse. Hurt people hurt people but that just damages the relationship further. So, having some type of method to work through your hurts constructively is key. You may need to work with a relationship coach to effectively do this.

Step Five- Discuss the details

People often wonder how much detail should be shared about an affair. Some betrayed spouses want to know every detail while others only want a summary. Usually the wayward spouse doesn’t want to share any details, so the betrayed spouse keeps asking for them, sometimes for years. Each time the affair gets brought up, it re-traumatizes the relationship. The betrayed spouse should be in charge of how much detail is shared, not the wayward spouse. However, remember the more detail you hear the more devastated you may become. Therefore, consider carefully how much information you need to know and why. Make a list of all the questions you have about the affair for your wayward partner. Some request their wayward spouse to answer the questions while connected to a lie detector test to increase the trustworthiness of their answers. That's a personal decision up to the betrayed partner. If you're the wayward partner, your job is to work much harder at healing the marriage than your spouse so if they request a lie detector test, do it! However, after the questions, both partners should agree not to bring up the affair any longer, excluding triggers, because each time it's brought up the marriage will suffer.

Step Six- Manage triggers

Part of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is getting triggered. Those who have been in combat will often experience flashbacks of the horrors they went through. Those who have been through natural disasters will often experience flashbacks of the devastation they experienced. Likewise, those who have been betrayed by an affair will often have flashbacks of the pain they suffered. Therefore, learning how to manage triggers is important for all couples who have experienced an affair. When triggered, the betrayed spouse must avoid two extremes. The first is not mentioning the trigger and suffering in silence, which will make you withdrawal emotionally. The second is becoming verbally aggressive toward your partner, which will lead to conflict. The third and recommended approach is to express each trigger with your tender underbelly. The tender underbelly is the tender feelings underneath your anger, such as sad, hurt, insecure, fearful, etc. For example, a tender underbelly statement when triggered could be “I was watching a movie last night that involved an affair and it triggered me with your affair and brought up all the feelings of sadness, hurt, and fear. ” The job of the wayward spouse is to respond with empathy, an apology, and reassurance, such as “I can definitely see how the movie would have triggered your feelings of sadness, hurt, and fear with the affair and I’m so sorry I hurt you, and I promise never to do something like that again.” This type of response to triggers creates healing opportunities for the marriage and if handled in this way triggers will decrease with time. The opposite is also true. If the betrayed partner expresses triggers with anger and the wayward partner responds with defensiveness, triggers will increase with time.

Get Our Leading Affair Recovery Program For Healing and Hope!

Step Seven- Develop compassion

Step seven is developing compassion toward your partner's hurtful behavior. Working on compassion is step seven because it's only appropriate after the wayward partner has cut off all contact with their lover, opened all accounts, expressed sincere remorse, has listened effectively to your hurts, has cooperated with answering your questions about the affair, and has responded well to your triggers. Only then does it make sense to start working on compassion toward their hurtful behavior. Developing compassion doesn't excuse away their hurtful behavior but it helps explain why it occurred. There are four questions to answer to foster compassion toward your partner's hurtful behavior and it's important to review these four areas whenever your hurt rises. First, what about your partner's upbringing or past may have influenced their affair? For example, many adults raised in a home where they felt inadequate are at higher risk for an affair because an affair makes them feel extremely wanted and important. Second, what about your partner's circumstances may have influenced their affair? For example, the more stress people are under the less willpower they have to resist tempting situations. Third, what was your pattern of behavior that may have increased their susceptibility to an affair? For example, perhaps you had been avoiding emotional or physical intimacy for an extended period of time. Fourth, what about your past is getting activated by the affair? For example, perhaps you have a history of feeling rejected or abandoned growing up so that's heightening your reaction to the affair. The goal of the questions is to help you understand all the variables that contributed to the affair. If you don't understand all the variables, it's difficult to move forward. Reviewing the answers to the four questions often acts as ointment to the affair wound when it rises by cultivating compassion.

Step Eight- Watch your self-talk

Step eight is reflecting on what you think the affair says about you. The betrayed spouse will often have negative thoughts, such as, "If I stay in this relationship I'm a fool" or "I'm unlovable or else they wouldn't have cheated." These statements are generalizations and need to be adjusted. The wayward spouse may also have negative thoughts about themselves, such as "I'm a piece of trash for cheating" or "I don't deserve a second chance. " How we think determines how we feel and how we behave. Therefore, getting our thoughts straight is paramount. To adjust your negative thoughts start by writing them down so you can look at them more objectively. Next, think of an alternative statement that's more balanced and truthful beside each original thought. For example, if the original thought is "If I stay in this relationship I'm a fool" an adjusted thought could be "If my partner hadn't cut off all contact with their lover, opened all accounts willingly, and expressed sincere remorse, I would be a fool for staying in this relationship. However, they have done those things so my decision to stay in the marriage is warranted." Another example, if the original thought is "I'm a piece of trash for cheating" an adjusted thought could be "I made a very poor decision to cheat that was extremely hurtful to my spouse; however, it doesn't mean I'm a piece of trash. I was in a bad place in life and made a terrible decision."

Step Nine- Fill your love buckets

Step nine is discovering the top things you need to fill up your love bucket to feel loved and satisfied and the top things your partner does that drains your love bucket. We all have a love bucket inside of us and we all need certain things to fill it up. Some common fillers include adoration, affection, sex, emotional closeness, thoughtful gestures, etc. Some common drainers include criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, contempt, not sharing power, etc. When you're dating you naturally fill up your partner's love bucket. However, after you're together for awhile most people stop filling their partner's love bucket and start draining it instead. Before long, the full bucket that made you fall in love with your partner becomes more and more empty until it's dry. Dry buckets increase susceptibility for affairs. Therefore, one of the best ways to affair proof your relationship moving forward is making sure you're both excelling at your partner's fillers they desire while minimizing the drainers they dislike to keep your buckets full. Here's an article to learn more about this model and reversing a loveless marriage.

Step Ten- Develop boundaries

The last step on recovering from an affair is discussing what boundaries you both will follow moving forward to reduce your affair risk. What's that going to look like for your relationship? For example, how should boundaries look when you're traveling away from one another? How should it look if you're going out with your friends for the night without your partner? What boundaries should you have around colleagues? What about at the gym? What should your limits be with alcohol when you're not together? What's not acceptable to discuss with the opposite gender? Working through these questions is vital to develop a unified front against future affairs. So many couples fall into affairs because they put themselves in risky situations without realizing it. Don't let that happen to you. Discuss what your boundaries as a couple will be to fortify your marriage from affairs moving forward.

As you can see, the road to affair recovery is narrow, but there is a road! Couples who follow these steps faithfully will discover the answers to "how to get over cheating."

For further reading check out the articles below.

Surviving infidelity

Is my marriage over?

Should I get a divorce?

How to save your marriage

How to fix a broken relationship

Take my FREE Relationship Audit Quiz here to see how healthy your relationship is.

Leave a comment below on which step you feel is hardest in affair recovery and why.

MARRIAGE PODCAST

APPS FOR COUPLES

MARRIAGE BOOKS

MARRIAGE RETREATS

RELATIONSHIP COACHING

BECOME A RELATIONSHIP COACH

MARRIAGE BOOT CAMP

Getting Over the Hurt of an Affair

Therapy, self-compassion, and social connection can help you cope in the aftermath of infidelity.

If you or your partner has had an affair, it can have a lasting impact on both of you. You might feel a variety of emotions, including:

anger
hurt
helplessness
guilt
self-blame

The pain of cheating can be difficult to endure — but with patience and self-care, you can learn to cope with the pain and find peace after infidelity. You can equip yourself for this journey with:

self-compassion
social connection
therapy

Whether you’ve decided to stay with your partner or end the relationship, it is possible to heal from the pain of infidelity.

Although cheating can have a lasting effect on your mental health, it’s possible to heal after infidelity, says Babita Spinelli, a psychotherapist licensed in New York, New Jersey, and Florida. Spinelli offers couples coaching for partners recovering after infidelity.

“For some, the experience is similar to grief and individuals go through similar stages of grief,” Spinelli says. “The pain feels like a huge loss — the loss of the person you thought you knew and trusted or the loss of the version of the relationship you had.”

Feelings of grief are common, according to Bonnie Scott, a Texas therapist who specializes in relationships and communication.

“It’s going to be a bit cyclical. Sometimes [clients] will still feel angry or disappointed or sad, and to cycle through those emotions is totally [typical],” she says. “But with time, therapy, and support from friends, I do think most people come to a place of acceptance.”

Yes, many relationships survive infidelity. But it can be tricky. “Whether the relationship can survive depends on both individuals’ commitment to rebuilding the relationship,” says Spinelli. “Both individuals need to be committed to doing some painful and long-term work to heal.”

This painful, long-term work isn’t for everyone, says Scott. She explains that it requires faith: You need to put in a lot of work without a guarantee that it will save the relationship. However, she says, it is possible to heal your relationship after infidelity.

Regardless of whether you and your partner are staying together or not, it’s possible to heal after cheating. The key to coping with the pain of infidelity is taking care of yourself in several ways, including:

1. Pausing

In the immediate aftermath of infidelity, you might feel compelled to make decisions. Should you break up with your partner, or stick with them? Should you tell people what happened? Should you move? Should you make other steps to detach your heart and your life from your partner’s?

Although these decisions are entirely yours to make, you don’t have to make them immediately.

Spinelli advises folks to “give yourself permission to pause on decisions while you process the betrayal.” You’ll likely be overwhelmed by a roller coaster of emotions, so it might be wise to take your time.

Scott suggests finding a place to stay for a few days to clear your head if you live with your partner. This can give you the mental space you need to start processing your emotions.

From there, you can make a plan for the future, whether that includes working through the infidelity with your partner or separating.

2. Self-compassion

Scott and Spinelli both advise practicing self-compassion. Be kind to yourself and take care of your needs.

After infidelity, you might ramp up negative self-talk. This might look like blaming yourself for issues in the relationship.

You can challenge negative self-talk by asking yourself:

Is this thought objectively true?
Is there evidence to the contrary?
Am I helping the situation by wallowing in these thoughts?
Is there something constructive I can do to address the issue?

Self-compassion also includes being patient with yourself.

You can “remember that your emotions may come in waves and feel like a roller coaster of feelings,” Spinelli says. “It can take time to work through.”

3. Caring for your body and mind

While your focus might be on understanding and processing the betrayal, it’s important not to neglect your physical and mental health. Disregarding your basic needs can leave you feeling worse — which isn’t good for you, your partner, or your relationship.

Self-care can include:

eating enough
sleeping enough
staying hydrated
engaging in enjoyable exercise
journaling
maintaining social connections
spending time in nature

Your self-care plan can be loosely held, Spinelli says there’s no need to chastise yourself if you skip a meal or forego your evening walk for an early bedtime. “Pay attention to what you need,” she advises. “Take a moment and ask yourself, what do I need today?”

4. Speaking with others

Both Spinelli and Scott emphasize the importance of spending time with loved ones after infidelity.

Although being cheated on or being outed as the one who cheated might make you feel isolated, you’re not alone. Cheating is common.

Learn to ask for help from trusted friends and family. You might find that talking with them about what happened — venting productively can help you process your experience and feel better.

You might also want to ask loved ones for practical help, such as:

a place to stay for a night or two while you clear your head
help with moving your things, if you choose to move
a lift to therapy or couples counseling
watching your kids for a few hours while you decompress

Spending time with your loved ones can help you feel less isolated, whether it’s:

over a meal
during a hike
for a quick cup of coffee during your lunch break

5. Therapy

Therapy can help you heal after infidelity. “Don’t be ashamed to seek professional help,” Spinelli says. “Talking things through in a safe, objective space is important. ”

Regardless of whether you decide to separate from your partner or not, individual counseling and couples therapy can be helpful. If you’ve decided to break up, couples counseling can help you separate peacefully.

If you’re staying together, couples counseling can help you both rebuild trust and move past shame.

“After infidelity, relationship counseling can be useful because it gives a safe and supportive space to explore some pretty intense emotions,” Scott explains. “A therapist can keep the conversation on topic and give feedback about emotions they’re hearing.”

Additionally, you might want to consider finding a therapist for one-on-one sessions to help you cope in the aftermath of cheating.

It’s absolutely possible to heal from infidelity. Although the pain and grief can be intense, it’s also possible to work on the relationship so that you and your partner are able to move on.

Resources

Was this helpful?

Art. 184 APC RF.

Issuance of rulings by an arbitration court

1. An arbitration court shall issue rulings in the cases provided for by this Code and in other cases on issues requiring resolution in the course of court proceedings.

2. The ruling shall be issued by the arbitration court in the form of a separate judicial act or protocol ruling.

The decision of the arbitration court in the form of a separate judicial act is carried out in the form of an electronic document. If there is no technical possibility in the arbitration court to execute the ruling in the form of an electronic document, the ruling shall be executed on paper.

When performing a definition in the form of an electronic document, an additional copy of this definition is made on paper.

3. An arbitration court shall issue a ruling in the form of a separate judicial act in all cases where this Code provides for the possibility of appealing against the ruling separately from appealing against a judicial act that ends the consideration of the case on the merits.

In other cases, the arbitration court has the right to issue a ruling both in the form of a separate judicial act and in the form of a protocol ruling.

4. The arbitral tribunal issues a ruling in the form of a separate judicial act under conditions that ensure the secrecy of the judges' meeting, according to the rules established for making a decision.

5. A protocol ruling may be issued by an arbitration court without leaving the courtroom. If the case is considered in a collegiate composition, the judges confer on issues related to the issuance of such a ruling on the spot, in the courtroom. The protocol ruling is announced orally and recorded in the minutes of the court session.

See all related documents >>>

< Article 183. Indexation of the sums of money awarded

Article 185. Content of the ruling >

1. A ruling is a judicial act adopted by an arbitration court in the course of legal proceedings in a specific case. The legislator shares the cases of issuing a decision, resolution, definition. The judicial act, which ends the consideration of the case in the court of first instance on the merits of the stated claims, can only be in the form of a court decision. Based on the results of consideration of an appeal or cassation complaint in a court of appellate or cassation instance, as well as on the results of consideration by the Presidium of the Supreme Court of the Russian Federation of a judicial act by way of supervision, a ruling is issued. In all other cases, the court makes rulings. In contrast to a court decision and resolution, when considering one case, the court may issue several rulings. Each procedural action performed by the arbitration court, from the acceptance of a statement of claim to the execution of the decision of the arbitration court, must be clothed in a procedural form, and most often such a form is a definition.

In the arbitration process, rulings act in two ways: 1) as interim judicial acts accompanying all activities in the administration of justice; 2) as final judicial acts, either completing the consideration of a case in a certain court instance, or acting as a final judicial act in a certain category of cases.

Rulings are issued by the arbitration court if this is expressly indicated in the APC (part 4 of article 11, part 5 of article 25, part 3 of article 39, part 3 of article 127, part 1 of article 128, part 1, article 147, etc.), as well as in other cases, if the issue under consideration requires resolution during the trial (for example, the issue of considering a case with the participation of arbitration assessors, announcing a break, refusing to attach to case materials of the document, on summoning a witness, etc.).

The decision, like any other judicial act, must be legal, justified and motivated. It is accepted at all stages of the arbitration process, in all types of judicial proceedings. This is the most common judicial act issued in a particular case.

If a court decision and ruling can be made only after the initiation of a case, then the current APC provides for the possibility of issuing a ruling before the plaintiff has filed a claim with the court. So, in accordance with Art. 99 of the APC, the arbitration court, at the request of an organization or a citizen, has the right to take interim measures aimed at ensuring the property interests of the applicant before filing a claim. The court issues a ruling on securing property interests.

Definitions can be classified according to various criteria: subject, form, content.

According to the accepted subject, determinations can be collegial and sole. The judge alone can decide on the reclamation of written and material evidence (part 6 of article 66 of the APC), on securing a claim (part 5 of article 93 of the APC), on summoning participants in the arbitration process (part 2 of article 121 of the APC), on accepting a statement of claim (part 3 of article 127 of the APC), on assigning a case to trial (art. 137 of the APC), etc. Most often such determinations are made at the stage of initiation, preparation of the case for trial. Cases of simplified proceedings are considered by a single judge. Therefore, all determinations when considering a case in this order are made by the judge alone.

Collegial rulings are issued in the case of consideration of the case by a collegial composition of the court. Such determinations are made already in the trial itself, for example, on issues of suspension of the proceedings (Article 147 of the APC), on leaving the application without consideration (Article 149APC), on termination of proceedings (Article 151 of the APC), on adjournment of court proceedings (Article 158 of the APC), etc. court session.

According to the nature of the impact on the development of the process, the definitions are divided into preparatory, suppressive, final, supplementary and private.

Preparatory rulings are intended to ensure that the case is properly prepared at all stages of the process. Such rulings are made on the issues of initiating a case, preparation, replacement of the wrong party, securing evidence, securing a claim, initiating appeal, cassation, supervisory proceedings, etc.

Preventive rulings prevent the commencement of a process or terminate proceedings in a case when there are no grounds for initiating a case. These include: refusal to accept a statement of claim (Article 127.1 of the APC), to leave the statement of claim without movement (Article 128 of the APC), to return the statement of claim (Article 129 of the APC), to leave the statement without movement (Article 149 of the APC ), on the termination of the proceedings (Article 151 of the APC), on the refusal to index monetary amounts (Article 183 of the APC), on the refusal to satisfy an application for a deferral or installment plan for the execution of a judicial act (Article 324 of the APC), on a refusal to suspension or termination of enforcement proceedings (Article 327 of the APC), etc.

Final rulings are issued when the case is completed without a court decision. This is a ruling on the approval of a settlement agreement (Article 141 of the APC), the plaintiff's waiver of the claim (Article 150 of the APC), etc.

Additional rulings are issued in order to eliminate various procedural inaccuracies made by the court. Such rulings may be issued regarding the correction of typographical errors and obvious arithmetic errors, on the clarification of the content of the court decision, on the restoration of the missed deadline for presenting the writ of execution for execution, etc.

Particular definitions are adopted in order to prevent or eliminate offenses. Federal Law of March 2, 2016 N 47-FZ, the possibility of adopting particular definitions is also provided for in the AIC.

2. Arbitration court rulings shall be issued only in writing, while the ruling may be in the form of a separate judicial act or in the form of a protocol ruling. Determinations in the form of a separate judicial act are adopted on the most important issues at various stages of the process. Protocol rulings are adopted at the court session and recorded in the minutes of the court session. In Art. 155 of the APC directly refers to the obligation to record in the minutes of the court session the rulings issued by the court without being removed to the deliberation room. Protocol rulings can also be issued when a separate procedural action is performed outside the framework of a trial, for example, when examining physical evidence.

In connection with the development of electronic document management of the Federal Law of June 23, 2016 N 220-FZ, it is possible to adopt a judicial ruling in the form of an electronic document. When preparing a ruling in the form of an electronic document, the arbitration court is obliged to additionally issue a copy of such ruling on paper.

3. Part 3 of the commented article indicates the mandatory and optional grounds for issuing a judicial ruling in the form of a separate judicial act.

The current arbitration procedural legislation provides for the obligation of the arbitration court to adopt a ruling in the form of a separate judicial act in the case when the APC provides for the possibility of appealing against the ruling separately from the judicial act, which ends the consideration of the case on the merits. Thus, if the arbitration procedural legislation provides that the ruling is an independent object of appeal, cassation, supervisory appeal, then in this case the arbitration court is obliged to make such a ruling in the form of a separate judicial act. In particular, the arbitration court is obliged to issue a ruling in the form of a separate judicial act when resolving the following issues: on the imposition of a judicial fine (Article 66 of the APC), on securing a claim or on refusing to secure a claim (Article 93 of the APC), on counter security (Article 94 of the APC), on the cancellation of the security of the claim and on the refusal to cancel the security of the claim (Article 97 of the APC), on the refusal to restore the missed procedural period (Article 113 of the APC), etc.

If the arbitration court violates the rule on the preparation of a ruling in the form of a separate judicial act, this should not infringe on the rights of the participants in the process to appeal. So, in practice, there are cases when a ruling, which must be issued in the form of a separate judicial act, is combined with a ruling that is not appealed separately from the court decision, for example, a ruling on accepting a statement of claim and a ruling on refusing to transfer the case to jurisdiction, the issue on procedural succession is reflected in the ruling on adjournment of the court session. In such cases, the participants in the process may file a complaint against the rulings, independent appeal of which is not provided, in terms of those issues on which a separate judicial act must be issued.

Optional grounds for accepting a judicial ruling in the form of a separate judicial act include cases where the arbitration court, at its discretion, establishes the form of a judicial ruling: it will be a separate judicial act or a protocol ruling. Such a situation arises in cases where the arbitration procedural legislation does not directly stipulate the possibility of appealing against a judicial ruling separately from the judicial act, which ends the consideration on the merits. In the form of a separate judicial act attached to the case file, the court may issue a ruling on the removal of a judge (Article 25 of the APC), on the entry into the process of third parties (Articles 50, 51 of the APC), on the involvement of an interpreter (Article 57 of the APC). ), on the elicitation of evidence (Article 66 of the APC), on the direction of a court order (Article 73 of the APC), on the execution of a court order (Article 74 of the APC), on the appointment of an examination (Article 82 of the APC), etc. In particular, the ruling on satisfaction or refusal to satisfy a petition (application) for filming, photographing, video recording or broadcasting a court session of an arbitration court on radio, television and (or) on the Internet may be entered in the minutes of the court session or issued in in the form of a separate judicial act (clause 5.1 of the Decree of the Plenum of the Supreme Arbitration Court of the Russian Federation of 08.10.2012 N 61 "On Ensuring Publicity in the Arbitration Process").

In such cases, it must be borne in mind that the mere fact of the adoption of a judicial decision in the form of a separate judicial act, which is carried out on the basis of judicial discretion, does not automatically mean that the participants in the process have the right to appeal such a decision. The jurisprudence follows this path.

4. A ruling issued in the form of a separate judicial act must be adopted in a deliberation room, subject to conditions ensuring the secrecy of the judges' deliberations. In such cases, the rules established for making a decision (art. 167 of the APC) apply. In particular, if the case is considered by the collegiate composition of the court, then when discussing the issue, the presiding judge votes last. Any influence on the judges who are in the deliberation room is not allowed. If the secrecy of the meeting is violated, the ruling of the court may be cancelled.

5. Unlike a ruling issued in the form of a separate judicial act, a protocol ruling may be issued by an arbitration court without being removed to the deliberation room. Such rulings are adopted directly in the court proceedings, announced orally and recorded in the minutes of the court session. If the case is considered in a collegiate composition, then all issues related to the issuance of such a decision are taken by the judges, conferring on the spot. Protocol rulings are adopted on most procedural issues related to the consideration of a particular case. These include rulings on the composition of the court considering the case; on the possibility of considering the case in the absence of non-appearing persons; on the procedure for examining evidence in the case; about the break; on the transition to judicial debate; on attaching documents to the case file, etc.

"Halloween Ends": The Case of the Mask

No one believed that the story of the masked maniac would ever end. I can’t believe it even now, because for more than 40 years we have been watching the same movie, only in profile, which is pretty tired. However, the new part of "Halloween" turned out to be, if not entirely successful, but a worthy conclusion to the legendary Carpenter slasher.

In Halloween Ends, Jamie Lee Curtis, the perpetually haunted Laurie Strode, has calmed down. She knits, bakes pies, flirts with a police officer and writes a book, trying to make sense of the bloody epic with Michael Myers. The maniac and the victim are forever bound by fear and hatred, but now the old woman lives with her granddaughter, whom she, on the eve of, of course, Halloween, introduces to the lonely boy Corey Cunningham, accused of killing a child.

The usual slasher, the authors decided to give more drama, and this radically distinguishes "Halloween Ends" from past episodes directed by David Gordon Green. True, the director himself cannot let go of the past, returning to what we already know. Memories flash across the screen that once upon a time there was a boy who stabbed his own sister, attacked the nanny and her friends, then ended up in the basement of a burning house, from which he miraculously got out. In this film, Michael Myers continues his path as a maniac. He disappeared, but did not die, which means that someone's blood will definitely be shed.

Frame from the movie "Halloween Ends" (2022)

However, the main character is not Michael, who is more alive than all the living, and not even Lori, but the bespectacled Corey, whom the locals shun. The ludicrous death of a child in the prologue and the celebratory drinking of disguised teenagers prepares us for the fact that Green's film will be a typical youth slasher. But you'll get bored if you're in the mood for ironically terrifying horror with sophisticated brutality. "Halloween is over" is neither scary nor amusing. Of course, massacres are arranged in it, but only towards the end, and the rest is a drama about the nature of evil, about how fear breeds violence, and how tragedy, like a disease, affects society. In this sense, the scene with the cut off language of the radio host is very expressive.

Learn more