Having sex with your best friend

5 Reasons Why You Should Have Sex With Your Best Friend & 5 Dangers

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It’s more common to think about having sex with your best friend than you might realize because it’s not one of those things that people commonly talk about. However, actually acting on those thoughts is a different thing altogether.

For this post, we’ll assume that your best friend is a guy. Hey, it happens! If your BFF is a woman, you might have a whole other slew of issues to deal with.

Why Do You Want to Have Sex With Your Best Friend?

1. You’re Horny

Are you simply horny? Perhaps you’ve had a dry spell. You might not have time to look for a new fuck buddy or dating partners. If you could simply have sex with a friend, even your best friend, it would make things a hell of a lot easier. And since all you want it sex, you think you’re safe from developing feelings. If it’s a one-and-done, the risk might really be pretty low.

Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.

Side not: If you are constantly horny and want to stop being horny, then look at these reasons why you are so horny. Of course, if you are struggling to get turned on, this guide on how to get horny should help.

2. You Have Feelings For Him

Sometimes we fall into the trap of trying to, well, trap someone by having sex with them. If you can foster a sexual connection with someone, perhaps a romantic connection will follow. We won’t lie: sometimes that happens.

Related: How to be romantic – 12 romantic ideas.

But if you secretly have feelings for someone, it’s usually unwise to have sex with them and hope that something comes with it. You’re better off having a discussion than having sex. Then, your bestie can let you know how he feels, and you can either act on your feelings or work on getting over them.

Side note: How to improve your sexual communication.

If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you'll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You'll also learn the 5 dangerous & "dumb" sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them. Get it here.

3. You Want Human Connection

Perhaps you don’t have feelings for your best friend, but you crave intimacy, and sex certainly provides a certain form of intimacy.

Related: 17 intimate sex techniques.

But if you want a relationship and he wants a relationship too, you might be better off dedicating your time and effort looking for someone who wants to be in an equal relationship with you where you’ll share genuine caring and connection.

4. You’re Not in the Right Head Space

Most people would never consider sleeping with their best friends. But occasionally we have what turns out to be a pretty unusual – or bad – idea because of where our head is. It might be that you’re drunk or high. Or you might be grieving, stressed out or otherwise not yourself.

Once you get back to your normal headspace, which might require you to sober up or even partake in a little therapy, you might be shocked that you even considered having sex with your best friend. Or you may realize that it’s really not that bad of an idea after all.

Benefits of Having Sex With Your Best Friend

You might realize the risks you run when thinking about sleeping with your best friend, but what about the benefits?

1. You know already each other.

The knowledge you have of each other outside the bedroom might translate into sexual chemistry in the bedroom. And anyone who has struggled because of the sexual learning curve can see why that would be a plus.

Your best friend is likely to understand the way you experience anxiety and stress you have at work. He also knows your friends and family, which might be a positive or a negative depending upon the way you look at it.

Learn: How to get rid of sexual anxiety.

Furthermore, because you know your best friend, you don’t have to look for someone to have sex with. You can skip clubbing, bar hopping and all the other date ideas because there’s a potential sexual partner right there – if he’s interested.

2. He probably would be down for it.

Some guys will tell you that if they have female friends, they’ve considered having sex with them. Very few guys would be offended by the suggestion (assuming they’re single and straight). This is one reason why people say that you can’t be just friends with a guy, but some people argue otherwise.

Of course, he may not be attracted to you (11 signs of sexual attraction) or see you so platonically that the thought hasn’t crossed his mind. That might mean you need to figure out how to escape the friend zone.

3. You’re Comfortable With Each Other

This might actually be an extension of knowing each other well, but comfort is an important factor when it comes to enjoying sex, especially for women. But you’re comfortable around your best friend, so you can skip that awkward stage where you’re getting to know one another and get right to gettin’ down.

He should read this: How to go down on a girl and eat her pussy.

4. You Get It Out Of Your System

Sometimes all we need is one good romp to stop our brains from obsessing over sex. Then, you can go back to that project at work or even dating without struggling to stop thinking about sex.

5. You Get Practice

Being sexually inexperienced can cause a lot of anxiety about sex. There might be a good looking fellow who you want to have sex with but are afraid to approach because you aren’t yet confident in bed (these 13 positions will make you feel more confident in bed). Enter your best friend, who gives you a helping hand.. or two.

Of course, you might remember a certain plot line in the show FRIENDS. In an alternate universe, Chandler and Monica were just friends, and he steps in to be her first sexual partner. She feels a boost of confidence after finally giving a guy her virginity, which she calls her “flower,” but Chandler finds himself jealous of the man she was practicing for. This leads us to our next point.

But There Are Risks

Of course, there are! That’s why you’re reading this post about having sex with your best friend rather than already jumping straight to having kinky sex. The first risk is a given.

1. Someone Develops Feelings

Even if you don’t have feelings for your best friend, having sex with him could cause them to arise. That’s one of the cons to any friends with benefits relationship. Despite having rules and setting boundaries, one of you is bound to develop feelings. If the other does, too, that can be good.

Of course, if you develop feelings even if you’re not compatible, it might lead to a messy breakup. And that’s never good.

But if it’s one-sided? You might feel resentful, feel used or want more from this relationship than your best friend is willing to give. And this is a problem because it is your best friend, after all.

2. Your Risk Your Friendship

The one thing that prevents many people from having sex with their best friend is the risk that doing so will ruin the friendship. You think that in the long run, you’ll wind up without a sexual partner and without a best friend. If the support your best friend provides you is more significant, then adding sex to the mix might just be too risky. Can you deal with it if your best friend suddenly isn’t your best friend anymore?

3. Your Friendship Feels Awkward

You might not be jeopardizing your friendship entirely if you have sex with your best friend, but you might risk decreasing the quality. Think about the sort of things you would talk to your best friend about. Those subjects probably include sex and the sexual or romantic partners in your life. But if that person is your best friend, you’ll need to find someone else to talk to.

It can go further than that, however. You might feel fine messaging your bestie sixteen times in a row or at all times of the day. That’s what best friends are for, right? But when you’re having sex with each other, it’s easy to over-analyze your interactions and feel yourself being needy. On the hand, you might find that you need space from your friend because you’re now doing the dirty.

Side note: One benefit is that you’ll probably start sending each other lots of sexy text messages.

This might mean you are less close with your best friend and you’re both unsure when to communicate or even how to do it!

4. People May Judge You

If you do let people in on the fact that you’re thinking about or actually having sex with your best friend, you might receive some ire. People are likely to condemn you for making such a “foolish” decision. Others might encourage you to begin a relationship even if that’s not what you want.

This doesn’t mean that you can’t tell anyone, but you should choose someone who can be supportive and balanced without issuing judgment on you and your bestie. And it might be necessary to find someone to whom you can speak about this big thing.

5. The Sex Might Be Bad

Bad sex is an unfortunate fact of life. That’s actually why we created the Bad Girls Bible, to teach you incredible sex tips to satisfy your man and an entire section on how to pleasure a woman.

Sometimes it’s the first time (tips for first time sex) and your sex life will improve (tips on how to improve your sex life) as you get to know each others’ sexual desires and erogenous zones. But sometimes you’re just not sexually compatible. So what do you do if the sex with your best friend is bad? If you never want to have sex with them again?

This situation has the potential be super awkward. You might not know how to tell him. One of you might wind up with hurt feelings. Looking someone in the eye after you’ve had sex can sometimes be awkward, but if the sex was bad and he’s your best friend, it could be mortifying.

If You Have Sex With Your Best Friend

Despite the risks, some people decide to go ahead and have sex with their best friends. Only you can make that decision. Once you’ve decided to go ahead and do it, how do you get to the point where you’re doing it?

You might be upfront with your best friend and say something like “Hey, I haven’t had sex for a while and I know you haven’t, either. How about we scratch that itch together?” Perhaps you simply go in for a kiss or grope when you’re physically close to your friend.

You might bring flirting into your relationship to see if he picks up on the cues. Be prepared that he might not pick up on those signals or, even worse, he does but isn’t interested.

For some people, alcohol or certain drugs might lower inhibitions and can lead to sex. Beware that you might regret decisions that you make while under the influence – and may not be able to legally consent. However, if the two of you are okay with a little social lubricant, a glass of wine might be just what the doctor ordered. In fact, alcohol is how some best friends wind up having sex, to begin with.

If this isn’t going to be a spontaneous decision, you probably want to talk about your expectations and desires to ensure you’re on the same page. Is this a one-time thing (one night stand tips)? How will you deal with feelings? So on and so forth.

Don’t forget safer sex practices such as using birth control and condoms, especially if either of you has other problems.

Specify rules for contact after sex. For some people, this will be easier than for others.

Finally, figure out what you’ll tell future partners. Will they know that you once slept with your best friend? Partners can feel jealous of close friends by default, especially if those friends are of the opposite gender (or the same gender if you’re bi or gay).

Related: How to deal with jealousy

Adding to the fact that you have carnal knowledge of your bestie, and you could be opening up a big can of worms.. with a partner whom you might not even have met yet!

Sometimes, despite all the risk, you’ve just got to have sex with your best friend and see how – and where – it goes. You can minimize some of these risks by following our advice before sleeping with your best friend, but you cannot eliminate any of them completely.

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30 Qs & Rules Before Sleeping Together

You’re contemplating having sex with your best friend.

Is it a good idea or a terrible one to sleep with them? Let’s look at the things you should know.

Ever heard a married friend say that they married their best friend? Has this ever made you wonder what it would be like to actually have sex with your best friend?

After all, if there’s one person who knows you best and whom you know will be loyal to you through and through, it’s your best friend. They know what you like, you share the same interests, and they can easily tell if you’re having a bad day just by how you walk.

While there are people who are happy to say they are in a relationship with their best friend, there are still those who can’t bear the thought of even just making out with their bestie.

So to finally settle the matter, we take a close look at the pros and cons of crossing the line and sleeping with your best friend, and what to do if you really do end up doing the deed.

[Read: Friendly sex? 20 hushed signs your friend wants to bang you]

Is sleeping with your best friend the best idea?

We want to tell you that sleeping with your best friend is a good idea but more likely than not, it isn’t.

Now, if you want to date each other, that’s different. It can end up as a successful relationship as you are already emotionally and mentally connected.

But sleeping with your best friend without the intention to be with them in a relationship is tricky to work around. If you must, follow these rules for sleeping with your best friend.

Because, at the end of the day, let’s face it, someone will develop even stronger feelings for the other person. When that happens, it does a lot of damage to the relationship. [Read: How to have sex with your friend and make sure things don’t get weird]

Sex with your best friend: Reasons to go for it

In the interests of balance, let’s look at the reasons to go for it when thinking about having sex with your best friend. Then, we’ll move on to why it might not be a great choice.

1. They know you best

There’s no better bedroom candidate than your best friend because they know you best. You tell them everything, and if there’s anyone who knows what you like, it’s them. The sex will only strengthen your connection even more.

2. They may already like you a lot

Meeting someone new or starting a relationship with someone new can be a big risk. It’s nerve-wracking. There’s a question of chemistry.

With your best friend, you already have this bond. And best of all, they may already like you a lot, but is just afraid to make a move. [Read: 17 clear signs you should be dating your best friend already]

3. They know how to please you… in bed

Being together all the time, it’s more than likely that feelings will eventually develop. And if they have on their part, they may have already imagined how you are in bed.

The fact that you are so comfortable with them means you probably already tell them bits and pieces of your sex life. That will also help them in that department. So when you finally do the deed, all the awkwardness will be gone and they may even know how to play you like a guitar.

4. They know your family and friends

If having sex with them is a prelude to a romantic relationship, then go for it. Since they know all your family and friends, it’s more than likely that they will approve of your relationship, compared to a new prospect, who will have to adjust or find it hard to fit into your circle. [Read: How to ask a friend out without risking your friendship]

5. They love you

Despite all your flaws and mistakes, your best friend has proven time and again that they’re there for you. They’ve been there for you at your worst and at your best. They love you and likely won’t do anything to hurt you—and you feel the same for them, too.

6. You can always go back to being friends

If the sex isn’t that good or if you really can’t find yourselves in a romantic relationship with each other, then you can make a clean break and just go back to being friends or best friends.

Done right, you can always agree to continue the friendship because you know you always have each other’s backs. [Read: The complete guide to staying best friends after having sex]

Sex with your best friend: When it’s a terrible idea

So, when is sleeping with your best friend not the best route to take?


When it’s awful, it’s appalling

If the sex is good, then surely you’ll both really get into it. However, there’s still that chance that the sex will be bad.

And if it’s bad, then it’s going to be all kinds of awkward and awful. You may not even be able to look them in the eye afterward.

2. Too much info

Sex is way more intimate than the talks you have with them, even if those talks involve your sex lives with other partners.

When the two of you do the deed, you’ll come off it knowing far too much about each other, and this is a territory that you may or may not be willing and able to cross together.

3. They may not be ideal after all

You may have fantasized about sleeping with them many times, and maybe they’ll admit to you that they do the same.

In your mind, they’re the perfect partner and you think the lay will be awesome. However, once you do it, the ideals might be shattered—if not for you, then maybe even for them. [Read: What are the unbreakable rules of opposite gender friendships?]


It can get tricky

So you may have sex with each other, and it could just be a one-time thing. Or you may have decided that you will just be friends with benefits *after all, they’re the perfect candidate*.

However, one of you may develop feelings for the other, leaving one person wanting to be in a more serious relationship, while the other isn’t ready for that. [Read: 25 friends with benefits rules you just can’t overlook]

5. The risks

No matter how great you are together as friends and how great they are as your best friend, there’s always a risk that these things might change once you take the friendship to another level.

Worst-case scenario: you may even end up losing your friendship.

6. Maybe it’s a big mistake

Having sex with your best friend is like opening Pandora’s box – out come a lot of questions and uncertainty, and there’s all the baggage that you both carry and know all too well.

In the end, one may just end up getting hurt. [Read: 23 signs to know if someone is thinking of you sexually and desires you]

You had sex with your best friend: Now what?

You two are not the only best friends in history who’ve had sex with each other, so don’t worry. And don’t panic! Here’s what you should do instead:

1. Talk about it

If there’s one thing you guys should really talk about, it’s this. Sooner or later, you have to talk about it, especially if you both value your friendship.

You can’t just go on ignoring the elephant in the room, so the best way to move on after having sex with your best friend is to talk about it and where the two of you want to go from there.

2. Was it just sex?

Were you just drunk? Were they just lonely? Were you just trying to get over an ex? Why did you sleep with each other? Do you see it as a way to start dating each other, or was it just good old sex?

Talk about what you both want to happen and see where that leads. [Read: 20 unmistakable signs your friend is crushing on you]


Give it time

You may both be shocked about what happened, so it’s also best to give it time.

Test the waters of this new dimension to your relationship and still keep hanging out together. See how things go. Who knows, there could really be something precious and wonderfully romantic developing.

4. Decide

Eventually, you guys will have to come to a mutual decision on what you want to happen in your relationship. Are you going to start dating or just become f*ck buddies? You both have to decide. [Read: The f*ck buddy guide – How to subtly convince your friend to be a FWB]

There’s nothing as precious as real, genuine friendship. After all, best friends are hard to come by. Still, there’s also nothing more spectacular and beautiful than a genuine romance between two people who know and love each other a lot.

These are the two sides of the spectrum that you have to seriously weigh if you are thinking of having sex with your best friend. So before you take that step, think of the consequences.

You of all people know what’s best for you, your best friend, and the friendship that you share. [Read: 36 random, fun and flirty questions to ask your friend]

Rules for sleeping with your best friend

If you’re pretty sure you’re going to go for it, then you’re going to need to be prepared. We’re going to show you the rules for sleeping with your best friend. You’re definitely going to need them. You’re venturing into muddy waters.

We’re not trying to scare you, but you need to know what you’re getting yourself into. So, now that we’re done lecturing you, here are the rules for sleeping with your best friend. [Read: How to seduce a friend subtly and find out if they’re into you]

1. First, ask yourself why you want to sleep with them

But seriously, why? Is this because you’re curious about what it would be like? Or you’re secretly in love with them and want them to like you back? If it’s either of those reasons then this is a horrible idea.

Now, if you already have good chemistry and both think it would be fun to try, then sure, we still think it’s a bad idea, but it’s a better reason than the other two listed. [Read: 12 signs to know if meaningless sex is for you]

2. Are there feelings involved?

This is a huge no-no if you feel that they like you, but you’re into them for more than sex and vice versa. But to be honest, having sex with your best friend without emotions is almost impossible. They’re your best friend.

If you want to sleep with them, you’re attracted to them and vice versa. So, you need to check where your heart is at and make sure they’re not in love with you. [Read: How to kiss a friend accidentally and get away with it]

3. Know the consequences

If you sleep with your best friend then you need to know that this can have drastic consequences to your relationship. You can’t just treat this as a “go with the flow” type situation.

Check with yourself before you make any moves and think a couple of steps ahead in case this doesn’t go down as planned. If not, you may end up losing the relationship entirely.

4. Know the boundaries

Yes, you are best friends so technically you’re not supposed to have boundaries but now that sex is involved, you definitely need to know where the line is.

Are you going to talk about other dates and people you’re interested in? Will there be sleepovers? Remember, you are already emotionally connected, so lay off any relationship-type situations.

5. Talk before having sex

Don’t leave the conversation for after. We know it’s an awkward conversation to have, but you’re going to have sex with this person so it needs to happen.

Before sleeping with your best friend, make sure you sit down and talk about it. What you will do if someone catches feelings or meets someone else, etc. [Read: What do guys think after you have sex with them for the first time?]

6. Keep this on the DL

Like, don’t tell anyone, really. We know you may want to tell people who you’re hooking up with, but in this case, people aren’t going to understand why you’re doing it if you have no intention of being with them, especially since they’re your best friend.

Also, it allows people to look at your relationship in a different light, and to be honest, it’s none of their business what you do behind your bedroom door.

7. Be honest about your emotions

If you’re feeling that you’re catching feelings for them, you need to tell them. Remember, they’re your best friend.

They’ve seen you at your worst, at your best, and everywhere in between. So, you have to be honest with them. If you hide your emotions, it’s going to make things a lot worse for you in the long run. [Read: A no-regrets guide to sleeping with a friend and doing it right]

8. Don’t expect anything

But literally, expect nothing. Don’t think that they’re going to become this changed person and fall for you to have a serious relationship.

Remember, if you expect this then you shouldn’t be sleeping with them. They agreed to have sex with you and that’s about it. So, keep the expectations extremely low, and it prevents you from developing emotions. [Read: How to tell when a FWB is catching feelings – 20 signs they’re falling for you]

9. Have safe sex

If this was someone you’re seriously seeing then wearing a condom may not be necessary *though you should use some form of contraception at all times*, but this person isn’t someone who’s going to be long-term.

Make sure that you’re STD-free and that they are as well. Wear a condom, you don’t want to have a baby with someone who was meant to be a fling. [Read: How to have safe sex every way possible]

10. Continue seeing other people

What usually happens is that we stop seeing and looking for other people when we’re sleeping with a friend. Instead, we attach and close ourselves off from the rest of the dating world.

But this person isn’t your partner, they’re just someone you’re sleeping with for the time being. So, keep going on dates with other people.

11. Tone down the jealousy

Listen, you can’t become upset because they met someone else. Your friends-with-benefits is not an actual relationship.

So, if they meet someone else, you have to be okay with it. If you can’t handle it, then cut it off and stop sleeping with them. You cannot be jealous in this situation. [Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship and learn to overcome it]


No sleepovers

Like we said, yes, you’re their best friend, but you need to have boundaries. Sleeping over at their house and cuddling in their bed isn’t sending clear “I only want sex” signals. You’re confusing things.

So, after sex, hang out a bit and then go home. You have your own bed so use it.

13. Enjoy it

It’s sex, it’s supposed to be fun and intimate so enjoy every second of it. Make sure to always check in with yourself and see where your emotions are, but if everything is going well, just enjoy the moment with them. This is your chance to let go and have mind-blowing sex. [Read: How to make your hookup miss you – 26 pros, cons, and ways to hook them]

14. Think about it once, twice, three times

This is your best friend that you want to have sex with, remember that. So, before you jump into bed with them, you need to really think about this.

Take some time, there’s no need to rush. The last thing you want is a ruined friendship. Is having sex with them really worth the risk?

[Read: How does being best friends with benefits really work out?]

Having sex with your best friend is a huge gamble. If you lose, you’ll have to pay a high price of losing your best friend. If you win, the payout makes the risk so much more worth it. So weigh your options before you cross the line and have sex with your best friend.

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Friend with bonuses: is it worth it to have sex with your friends

June 11, 2014Sex

I slept with a friend. More than once. It was very good (to use his words, "grandmother-neighbor definitely woke up"). The English language has many phrases and epithets for various kinds of sexual relations. Hook up, one night stand, friends with benefits. We will talk about the latter. For simplicity, let's call it DSB - a friend with bonuses.



Once, while sitting in the kitchen of a friend of mine, I casually mentioned an unusually long lull on the personal front, as they say. I broke up with my last boyfriend in a good way (note to the hostess: loving his music and loving him are different stories), there were no prospects, sleeping with strangers was not quite comfortable for me, and my libido howled and asked to be released.

A friend smiled sweetly at me - we had flirted before, but not seriously - and suggested that we meet at some cozy cafe during the week to discuss options.

I don't like flirting, so the cards are on the table. We slept. Nothing happened to the friendship itself.

The English language has many phrases and epithets for various kinds of sexual relations. Hook up, one night stand, friends with benefits. We will talk about DsB - a friend with bonuses .

Why is it needed

I have already described my reason, and, as a rule, it is the main one. All people have different needs. Someone is ready to do without sex for a long time in anticipation of falling in love (or marriage). Someone - no. For the latter, DSB can become a long-awaited outlet, if you approach the issue correctly.

Your DsB is first and foremost your friend, not a casual acquaintance in a bar. You know this person well, trust him, you enjoy his company. Maybe you have already discussed your sexual preferences or fantasies. Maybe they found common ground.

It’s easier for such a person to say: “Sorry, I don’t like it very much, let’s try it like this.” Because he, unlike the stranger from the bar, most likely is not indifferent to your pleasure.

And without the hormonal roulette of falling in love, when you are struggling to please your partner and “not screw it up”, it's easier to be yourself. To relax. Isn't that the key to good sex?

Who to choose?

This is, of course, the key question. Meet the ideal candidate.

Where to look Why it matters
Been your friend long enough for you to cherish this friendship something else
Attracts you on a purely physiological level Fits in everything else, but not to your taste? What good will you jump out of bed in the process, and the poor man will take it personally
Not a prude and not a puritan The opposite can be especially unpleasant for girls when, leaning back on the pillow, your friend contemptuously throws: “And you, it turns out, are such a whore”
Knows how to keep secrets Let him personal remains personal
Not looking for love/family/children, at least not with you Slippery moment (we often don't know what we want and with whom). If you are not sure, discuss. If you are still unsure, please pass
Not jealous The whole point of such a scheme is to avoid the problems associated with romantic love. Do you want a friend to call with questions about where you are and with whom?
Don't mind No comment


Remove any line - the risk will jump, and even a full configuration (whether it contains at least a hundred points) will not ensure success without your thoughtful approach.

Main secret: apply this checklist to yourself . Do you pass all the points? Do you really want this? And only then look towards friends.

With another good friend, I managed to realize some of the fantasies that I did not want to try with regular partners at that time. I knew he wouldn't judge or laugh. The embarrassment went away in the first five minutes, it was very comfortable and fun, and even after years I am grateful for this experience. I began to better understand my body and my boundaries.

But this turned out to be possible for only one reason: we approached the issue consciously. We discussed all the details. I knew exactly what I wanted to get out of it. And he too.

Recipes for disaster

1) Married friends or monogamous

In a nutshell: don't. Even leaving the moral side of the question, if your friend has an unsuspecting partner, it can turn into a lot of trouble. At least - the loss of a friend. Maximum - a massacre or something more difficult.

2) Hidden motives

Sleeping with a friend in the hope that he will fall in love with you is no better idea than the previous one. First, most likely, not fall in love. Secondly, even if you fall in love, there is a chance that you will not like it (I remember an anecdote where it was advised not to confuse tourism with immigration).

3) Out of desperation

If you haven't had sex in such a long time that your self-esteem is starting to drop (or it was low from the start), don't lash out at your friends in an attempt to rehabilitate it. First, it's disrespectful. Secondly, it means that you are entering a new and rather delicate phase of the relationship from the wrong premises. For you, the pleasure of sex is not an end, but a means. And it should be the other way around.

4) Risk factor

If you or your future partner have inclinations that conflict with the idea of ​​D&B (you can’t sleep with a person without falling in love or, on the contrary, without losing all interest in him; partner is jealous, even if he tries not to be jealous), press the brake. Many good relationships ended with the phrase: “This time will be different.” It won't, don't expect it.

5) Case history

Alas, trust is not a panacea. Get tested for all relevant sores. It's terribly unsexy, but a mistake here can be costly. Think "the morning after" would be awkward? Imagine as you will be embarrassed in a week with an unpronounceable diagnosis.

We hardly communicate with our first friend now. He is happily married. With the second recently went to barbecue. We have excellent, purely friendly relations, and it seems that we managed to get around all the pitfalls without loss. It's difficult, but very real. If you're ready, go for it.

is it worth sleeping with someone you are friends with

Is it worth sleeping with a friend and how can this threaten your relationship?

Friendship between a man and a woman exists. But often someone at least sometimes has a desire for intimacy. Most do not give these desires a go, so as not to lose friendship. Perhaps you shouldn't do this? What are the pitfalls in sex with a friend?

Non-reciprocal love

Many men only agree to stay in the friend zone because they are in love with us. They hope one day to gain access to the body, and then to the heart. If sex happened and the first stage was passed, but you don’t want to continue, it’s better to immediately set such boundaries. But, unfortunately, if a man in love realizes that he cannot see his heart, he will remain obsessive for a while, and later try to reduce communication to a minimum. What kind of friendship is this?

SUBJECT: I took a lover: 4 candid stories about relationships on the side

The same goes for women. Do not hope to tie a friend to sex. Be honest with yourself: is he your friend, or are you in love?

Relationships on a different plane

After sex, your relationship may move to another plane. If before, let's say, you allowed dirty jokes on each other, even about weight, appearance and lovers, now you can feel awkward from this. After all, you allowed each other to too intimate a sphere.

RELATED: 7 products that will help restore interest in sex

Friends with preferences

Many people think that it is possible to be friends and sometimes have sex without turning the relationship into a romantic one. Unfortunately, one day someone will start to feel used, demand more, and destroy trusting friendships.

The bitter truth

It may happen that a man pretended to be your friend just for the sake of access to the body. Most likely, this is a new acquaintance who appeared in your life during a difficult period: he consoles, listens, prompts. Why not, but keep in mind, in the future, just friendship is no longer interested in him.

Strong relationship

But, contrary to the disadvantages described above, sex with a friend can be a huge fat plus. If suddenly you coincide in an intimate way and easily move on to a romantic relationship, realizing that there is no one closer than you to each other. Strong families are often formed from such couples, so if you feel that this is mutual, act.

RELATED: 6 things about sex that men will never like

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Alina Shubskaya


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