Coffee meets bagel introverts

How To Get Out Of Your Head As An Introvert

February 20, 2015/in Date Tips /by Guest Blogger

If you’re an introvert, you can relate to this situation: You’re on a date with a girl you’re interested in, but you end up sitting there and not saying anything.

“This party is awesome.”

Once you finally break out of your shell, the date is over and she has already made up her mind about you. If I had a dollar for every time I did this, I would be very rich.
As introverts, we know our strengths. We are great listeners, we know how to connect with people 1 on 1, on a deep level, and we spend a lot of time thinking about… everything.
However, we aren’t the best at getting out of our heads and into the present moment to talk with other people. We miss out on opportunities to meet new dates, or we feel like we didn’t make the best impression on someone.
Today I want to share with you how I get out of my head and into a more talkative mood. I am offering a free checklist that you can go through before you go out.
Free Download: Download The Daily Practice I go through to help me get out of my introverted shell and connect with people and experience more opportunities. Going out and meeting people isn’t the first thing we think about as introverts.
It’s not that we don’t like talking to people, but we have to be in the right mood to get out of our heads. But, getting out of your head is the first step when it comes to getting into control of your dating life.
Because let’s face it, we want control of who we meet. If we are on a date we want to give our best first impression. Being ready to open up and connect with someone leads to more fun and more experiences. Who doesn’t want that?

After years of practice and learning how to talk to people, I learned that even as someone who is typically in my head, I can prepare for to talk to people without having much effort. I came up with a daily practice that helped me get out of my head and have awesome conversations with people I just met. Here’s what your brain looks like before and after The Daily Practice Some of you are already putting this method into practice and have shared some of your results.

Mentally Prepare to Meet People
When I am going out to meet someone I prepare for it in my head. It’s easy for me to stay in my head all day, especially if I am at home writing. Before I leave my house, I will say to myself “I am ready to go out and talk to people.” This way, I signal to my brain that it’s time to switch gears from introverted more to slightly more talkative introverted mode.
Warm up for a social situations
Let’s say you’re going on a date tonight. Take some time to prep yourself by talking to other people prior to the date.

Go to a coffee shop or grocery store and talk with the employee and take the conversation one step past “Hey how are you?” This way you are challenging your self to get outside of your comfort zone in a low pressure environment and still allow for practice.
You could give the barista a genuine compliment, or ask them “What has been the best part of your day so far?”
Call a friend and have a quick conversation with them.

The best mentality for meeting new people
When I go out to meet new people, I have one goal. Have fun. This takes all of the pressure off and allows whoever I am talking with to have fun too. If you are going to a party and meeting new people, focus on having fun and leaving people better than you found them.This means joke with them, find out what they are most excited about in life, or what their biggest goals are in life. If it’s a first date — don’t worry about finding out if you are meant to be together forever, or if you have a deep connection. Focus on having a good time and what they are excited about in life. The connection will develop organically from there.
Journal about your experiences
Journaling is the best way to keep track of your progress. When you practice the Daily Challenge, come home and reflect on your experience. Write down what you said, how you felt, how they responded, and how you can improve next time. Over time you will see how much progress you have made. All of us want instant success without trying. We get impatient when it doesn’t happen overnight. Journaling helps keeps our progress in perspective and shows that we have made significant progress even in a small amount of time.
The compound interest effect and how it applies to meeting new people
When you aim to get 1% better each day, you will become exponentially better over time. Just like compound interest. This happens because when we develop our social skills, talking to people becomes much more natural and we don’t have to spend so much effort getting out of our heads.

This is your brain on The Daily Practice

Aim to get outside of your comfort zone one time each day. This might be as simple as smiling at someone as you pass them by on the street, or having a deep conversation with someone you just met at a party.
Once you put these skills into practice you will find that you aren’t stuck in your head thinking of what to to say. Walking up to someone you are interested in feels natural, and you will feel confident and excited to meet them.
Next steps for you: Download The Daily Practice and look at it everyday on your phone or computer and put it into practice. I’ve included other helpful links about talking to people, getting past mental barriers in the guide as well.

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Best Dating Apps For Introverts To Make Connections In 2023

Author:

Gaby Messino

April 21, 2023

Commerce Writer

By Gaby Messino

Commerce Writer

Gaby Messino is a freelance journalist whose work has been published in Cosmopolitan, Men’s Health, and numerous smaller blogs and newspapers.

Summary

Image by mbg creative

April 21, 2023

Our editors have independently chosen the products listed on this page. If you purchase something mentioned in this article, we may earn a small commission.

The best dating apps for introverts:

Best for serious relationships: eHarmony
Best for a smaller dating pool: Coffee Meets Bagel
Best for 40+: Match
Best for working professionals: The League
Best for young people: Yubo
Best for LGBTQ+: Lex
Best for people who want kids: Heybaby
Best for hookups: Tinder

Dating can be overwhelming for anyone, but introverts have the added challenge of social settings draining their energy. This amps up the difficulty of meeting new people—and makes it even harder to find that special someone. Instead of giving up on love (or lust), the best dating apps for introverts can ease the burden of making new connections.

What is an introvert?

Identifying as an introvert is all about where you get your energy from. Extroverts get their energy through being around and interacting with other people; introverts recharge and gain energy from spending time alone. This doesn’t mean that introverts aren’t social or don’t enjoy going out around others, rather they need extra time processing experiences afterwards.

“Introverts can get overstimulated very easily just by being around people,” says dating expert Silvy Khoucasian. “There's this experience of wanting to reserve that energy level.”

Of course, not all introverts are the same. Experts have identified four main introversion types: social, thinking, anxious, and restrained. Each one impacts social interactions differently, which can impact the right dating app for you.

Understanding your introversion type will ensure you’re finding the right way to connect with potential partners. It’ll also help you better understand yourself and what you’re looking for in a partner (whether short-term or long-term).

Social Introverts: Feels most comfortable in small groups and requires alone time to recharge, especially in relationships. Experts recommend online dating and suggest skipping the small talk by going to places they enjoy with potential partners.
Thinking Introverts: Thinks before speaking, which may come off as standoffish . When dating, experts say thinking introverts should be upfront about their introversion to ensure it doesn’t come across as disinterest.
Anxious Introverts: Likely avoids social interactions with a quiet disposition that comes across as nervous. Experts suggest staying in your comfort zone and seeking out people vetted by close connections.
Restrained Introvert: Tend to be reserved around others with a more grounded energy. This reserved approach to love requires time to open up and should be shared with future partners.

Regardless of your introversion type, Khoucasian recommends that you take extra time to process things to ensure dating stays enjoyable.

Do introverts use dating apps?

Yes. Surveys show that 30% of adults use dating apps, and that number increases to over 50% when looking at younger demographics or people in the LGBTQ+ community.

“I think more people are meeting on dating apps these days, then not on dating apps,” says therapist and clinical psychologist Chloe Carmichael, PhD. You'll find apps curated to single parents, people over 50, and even working professionals.

In fact, dating apps might actually be preferential to introverts, who would rather meet someone one-on-one than in a crowded space, like a bar or party.

How we picked:

Active User Base

You can’t meet someone on an app if there isn’t anyone to meet. We stuck with established dating apps with notable user bases to ensure you’re not waiting for your next potential match to populate.

Variety

When looking for love, you want someone who shares your interests and values. Every app has a set audience, so find the one that aligns with what you want in a partner: romance, casual dating, or something in between.

Introvert-friendly

Endless swiping isn’t alway the best option for introverts. We sought out unique algorithms that offer inventive ways to help you discover prospects beyond swiping for looks.

Experts & customer approval

We used a combination of expert recommendations, first hand experience, and reviews to curate the best selection of introverts.

Our picks for the best dating apps for introverts:

Best for serious relationships:: eharmony

Pros:

Extremely thorough matching process
Compatibility scores for every potential match
Lower risk of time wasters

Cons:

Almost no capability with free membership
Many people still don't have detailed profiles
Takes a long time to set up

Compatibility:

Where to browse:

One of our favorite dating sites for serious relationships, eharmony is a great choice for introverts who know they are looking for something real. In fact, couples' therapist Kyle Zrenchik, Ph.D., LMFT, ACS previously told mindbodygreen that eHarmony claims to be responsible for 4% of marriages in the U.S., which is a huge number all things considered.

What we love about ebarmony is that it weeds out a lot of people who aren't serious about dating (AKA potential time wasters). The site does this by boasting a comprehensive questionnaire for every user, outlining your likes, dislikes, and values with over 80 questions. From there, you'll be paired with potential matches (each of which comes with a compatibility score).

If this sounds intense, that's because it is. The signup process will take at least 20 minutes—but many users find the time spent to be well worth it, considering the fact that you'll be given access to a pool of people who are actually looking for a relationship, and who care enough to take a few extra minutes.

The only major downside? You'll need a paid membership to get the best experience, as pretty much every feature on the app is blurred out without one.

Read our full eHarmony review to learn about our testers' experiences with the app. Plus, save 20% on any membership with code MBG20.

Success story: A couple in their 50s who met on eharmony and have been married six years.

Price: Prices start at $60/month for the most affordable membership and drop down to $30/month for the biggest bundle. Memberships are available in 6, 12, or 24 month increments.

Best for a smaller dating pool: Coffee Meets Bagel

Pros:

Encourages meeting in person
Free version works great

Cons:

Limited amount of matches per day
Skews towards a younger crowd

Compatibility:

Where to browse:

Previously recommended to us by marriage therapist Omar Ruiz, LMFT, Coffee Meets Bagel is a great option for those who don’t want to spend all day swiping around an app.

You’re only given a handful of prospects each day, which refresh every 24 hours. You’ll have limited time to send a like or make a match, which makes CBM like a fun daily game. Once matched, chats are limited to just seven days with options to text or video chat.

Creating an account is easy, and while there is no bio section, there are tons of different prompts to get you to talk about yourself. Along with your general information you can also add relationship goals, personality traits—like introversion—and values you have that you want to share with a potential partner.

Switch between swiping on people suggested for you, and those who’ve already liked your profile. Or if you are looking for something specific, the app’s search feature allows you to sort by age, distance, religion, education level, and ethnicity.

The rapid push towards meet-ups may not be ideal for restrained introverts. But we think it’s a great option for thinking introvert: fewer matches make you feel overwhelmed and less time to overthink your next date.

Price: There are free, mini, and premium subscriptions. The mini and premium deals can be purchased in 1-, 3-, or 6-month packages. Mini deals range from $15 to $50, while premium is $35 to $120.

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The best for 40+ : Match

Pros:

Weeds out people who aren’t committed
One-on-one time with dating experts

Cons:

Requires a lot of effort
Fewer active users than other apps

Compatibility:

Where to browse:

Launched in 1995, Match is one of the oldest existing dating sites—though the brand has since developed an app. Similar to eHarmony, it caters to an older demographic, making it one of the best dating sites for people over 40.

Match is known for having a longer setup process to better figure out who you are (and who your best match might be). It allows more than 20 photos and includes a lengthy bio section to showcase your full personality.

When you sign up, you also fill out an extensive questionnaire. The lengthy sign-up is one of the reasons we consider Match one of the best options for serious daters who are ready to be committed

Once signed up, you'll have a few ways to find potential matches. Along with swiping, Match has a comprehensive search system. Reverse Search allows users to see people whose preferences match yours, while Mutual Search results in people who match your preferences and whose preferences you match.

When you find a potential connection, you'll have the choice to chat or video call within the app, if you're worried about privacy. Need to know more? Check out our full Match.com review.

Price: There are free, standard, and premium plans that range in 3- to 6-month subscriptions. Rates start at $34.45 for a 3-month standard subscription to $23.11 a month for a yearly premium subscription.

The best for working professionals: The League

Pros:

Weeds out people who aren’t serious about dating
Matches you with people who are ambitious about their career
Filters out work colleagues

Cons:

Wait list required to join app (can pay to skip line)
Lack of diversity
Has been described at elitist

Compatibility:

Where to browse:

Featured in our round-up of the best dating apps for working professionals, The League is the perfect midway between LinkedIn and Tinder. Best for those who want to avoid decision overload, it only offers a few potential connections every day between 5 to 6 p.m. (otherwise known as happy hour in the working world).

If both parties are interested in connecting, you'll get 30 days to chat directly in the app. If you prefer to connect over conversation (instead of messaging), you can partake in a weekly speed dating process on the app. You'll get to connect with others from any safe environment, taking the pressure off going to a new location with a strange.

The app also offers curate events for users, though these may not be the apps best offering for introverts. We'd also note there is a waiting list for this app, though you can skip the wait for a small fee.

Price: The League offers three membership tiers: a Member subscription for $299.99/month, an Owner subscription for $399.99/month, and an Investor subscription for $999.99/month.

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Best for young people: Yubo

Pros:

Ability to connect with people around the world, not just those in your area
Creates real-time conversations

Cons:

Large percentage of the user base are teens

Compatibility:

Price:

One of the best apps for young introverts, Yubo is designed specifically for Gen Z—and it's a great app for making friends. The social app has a large selection of interests you can add to your profile, with chat streams, live events, and games for users to interact with each other. Display your favorite recording artists, tv shows, and movies and choose five emojis to describe yourself, giving other users a range of conversation starters.

Dating app users will be familiar with the swipe-based interface. The only difference? This app leans heavily into friendship. Instead of focusing on finding just one person, you can use Yubo to meet a whole group of friends. We also love that the app's algorithm separates teen content from adults, making it a safe, approachable space for a range of ages.

It's not location-based, either. Instead, you can connect with people from all over the world. Connections are truly based on interests, and the app encourages all users to show up as their truest selves.

Price: Yubo costs $9.99 per week for a limited quantity of YuBucks (the app's currency). From there, users can replenish their YuBuck supply in the app as needed.

The best for LGBTQ+: Lex

Pros:

Helps create any kind of relationship: romantic, casual, friendship
No limit on the number of people you can connect with in your area

Cons:

Mainly targeted toward woman and nonbinary individuals (sorry guys)
Limited to six posts a month

Compatibility:

With only one photo required, Lex has an even quicker setup process than most dating sites. While we love that this app takes the primary focus off of what people look like, we don't love that it allows users to leave the one photo blank.

What the profile setup does include is a response to four specific prompts: about me, ask me about, I’d like to know, and teach me something about. Bonus: the app also lets you share your star sign (don't worry, this is optional).

The limited amount of required information is great for those who tend to overthink, as there's not a lot of extra information required to get started. Plus, the general anonymity of the app is optimal for those who are apprehensive about meeting new people or who aren't naturally outgoing.

The actual platform feels like a cross between Twitter and Craigslist. The main page contains text-based posts from people in your area, covering topics such as finding love, upcoming events, apartments for rent, and even popular kinks.

Our favorite feature? Shy introverts can share “missed connections" if they see someone they are too timid to approach in real life, with the hope to find them on the app.

Price: Free, with no premium offerings.

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Best for people who want kids: Heybaby

Pros:

Sign up is easy
Targeted towards finding serious relationships

Cons:

Limited number of connections

Compatibility:

Parenting and dating often seem at odds with one another, but HeyBaby aims to make it easier. The app is for current parents, parents-to-be, and people who want kids in the future. You can sign in through your Apple, Google or Facebook accounts.

Creating your profile is fairly straightforward: Along with the standard questions, the brand also provides prompts to determine compatibility, including what time you like to get to the airport and how messy you are. We love the addition of these fun details—they truly do open the door for easy conversation, which is especially helpful for introverts.

While other dating apps may feel more like applying for a job (or interviewing candidates), HeyBaby has a fun, upbeat vibe. Right now, the app is only available within the United States. You can also head to the brand’s blog for helpful content on how to introduce your kids to a new partner, the advantages of dating a single dad, tips for breaking bad relationship patterns, and other highly relatable topics.

Price: Free, with no premium offerings.

Best for hookups: Tinder

Pros:

Most used dating app in the world
Easy to find matches quickly

Cons:

Users can get a little creepy and invasive
Hard to talk to some users

Compatibility:

Being introverted doesn't necessarily mean you're not interested in a no-strings-attached meetup—and Tinder is the standard option for a quick fling. (Though we'd be remiss not to mention you can find a serious relationship here, too, with the right filters and approach).

Tinder practically invented the swipe-to-like model, and setting up a profile is beyond simple. While the app does seem to be male-heavy (which makes matching much simpler for women), most users will be able to find success for hookups or casual dates.

We think the sheer overflow of users on Tinder makes it a great option for even the shyest people to put themselves out there, as it's pretty easy to start a new conversation and has a noticeably lighthearted tone. Deemed a great option for "singles who were looking to have 100 conversations" by Jamal, there's no doubt that you'll find some new experiences on this app. Just be sure you have a few good opening lines prepared.

Price: Tinder's free version works fine, but there is also Tinder+ for $7.99 a month, Tinder Gold for $24.99, and Tinder Platinum for $29.99.

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The benefits of healthy relationships

Finding a partner can add excitement to your life, but the benefits go beyond companionship.

Research suggests high-quality relationships1 can create a younger subjective age bias (or make you feel younger than your chronological age). A lower subjective age has been linked to better cognitive health3, better episodic memory3, and healthier aging4.

A 2021 meta analysis of social support and longevity supports5 these findings. For example, it points to the stress-buffering hypothesis6, which suggests that a support network like friends or a partner reduces stress.

Top tips for dating

Dating is a numbers game—and we fully believe the more you use apps and go on dates, the more comfortable you'll be. Below, find a few expert-backed ways to bring more success into your dating life:

Make sure your profile is in tip-top shape: “I have a client that just sent me a bunch of her profile screenshots, and I'm gonna go over them with her to really see like, is this profile really capturing the essence of this person as best as possible, right? Are the pictures really capturing the range of emotions that you're able to express?” says Khoucasian.

Meet as soon as possible: “When we meet a human in person, we develop a different kind of connection,” life coach Alia Jamal explains.

Keep the first date quick: Chloe Carmichael says, “Your first date should never go for more than 90 minutes.”

Take breaks: Lue says to be mindful of when you're tapped out on the apps, and not to wait until you feel super burnt out to take a break. Breaks can help bring you back with a fresh perspective and a new jolt of excitement.

Focus on the person as a whole: Jamal recommends focusing on what the person is looking for and what they offer as a whole, rather than immediately placing them into a specific category based on looks or their brief profile resume.

FAQ:

Where do introverts meet people?

Anywhere! Introverts can meet people on dating apps, at the grocery store, or even at work. Meeting people is less about finding the “best” place, and more about finding the place that is the best for you. If you are unsure where to start try the big three (Tinder, Bumble, Hinge), where there are tons of potential matches.

How do introverts start dating?

There is no right or wrong way to start dating, but a good first step is to download an app and make a profile. You can’t meet people if you are not going to where the people are.

Is Bumble good for introverts?

While some women prefer Bumble because it gives them the freedom to message first and potentially avoid unwanted contact, it could be less enticing for introverts who do not want to make the first move.

The takeaway

Dating comes with its own struggles for everyone, but there are a few simple steps that can help introverts enjoy it more. For starters, find an app that meets your specific needs, and one that you feel comfortable using. Most importantly, trust yourself throughout the process. And, once you're ready to meet someone in real life, try using these conversation starters from a dating coach to kickstart the connection.

Coffee meets bagel review | PCMag

Coffee dates are the most important first dates. Caffeine in a nice intimate place is a great way to sit closer with a new person and talk about your life. Other date ideas might be more exciting, but coffee dates just work . Coffee Meets Bagel also works as a dating app. But other dating apps work just as well, if not better, with a lot more options.

Starting

Coffee Meets Bagel is a free mobile app for Android and iOS devices (mostly I tested on iPhone 12 mini) that bills itself as a place for deeper and longer-term relationships. Its main trap is to offer users daily carefully selected matches, called "bagels". The goal is to quickly connect to high-quality matches, instead of mindlessly scrolling through random faces like you would with Tinder's Editors' Choice.

However, the initial registration process was indistinguishable from any other dating app. You enter your phone number to create an account, enter basic details (location, career, education, gender) and partner preferences (age, religion, height). I needed to upload at least one photo in order for my account to be approved, but I didn't have to fill out a long form like with eharmony or OkCupid. At first I felt like Coffee Meets Bagel couldn't know me very well due to the lack of questions, but the app gave me the opportunity to express myself.

Profiles and interface

Thankfully, once you dive into Coffee Meets Bagel's digital dating pool, you'll find more ways to showcase your personality. Along with entering photos and personal details, you can fill out requests that add flair to your profile. What scares you? What is your strongest opinion? What always makes you laugh? These are the details that a potential couple can see.

The profiles themselves display large photos at the top and personal details below them. Instead of showing your name, profiles showcase your work and studies. If you want to seriously invest in someone, these are important details to know. The dating app's community also defines a lot of its overall culture, and many of the people I saw on the app definitely seemed more interested in lasting love than casual flings.

The main sections of Coffee Meets Bagel allow you to view suggested matches, see who likes you, find and search profiles besides your suggestions, and read your chats. You can send a message along with your likes, but you can only like a few suggested matches per day for free, just like on Hinge. If you like other profiles, you need to pay a premium, which I will talk about later. However, there's really not much you can do every day other than browsing and maybe a few suggestions.

It's nice to limit your time on the dating app to a few minutes a day rather than turning it into a sad, all-consuming obsession. However, the big hook of Coffee Meets Bagel - daily matches - is something you'll also find on other dating apps, like our Editors' Choice Match. You might be put off by Kippo's fun dating program or Facebook Dating's social media integration, but at least these apps offer something you won't find anywhere else.

Continuing the food theme, Coffee Meets Bagel sells a premium currency called Beans. With Beans, you can like any profile, not just the one suggested to you. If both people in the chat don't send at least one message within three days, the chat will expire. This encourages you to keep the conversation active, but sometimes adults are just busy. However, you can also spend beans to extend overdue conversations beyond this compressed schedule. The beans are sold in packs of $100, $2,000, and $3,000 at a price of $1.9$9, $23.99 and $24.99 respectively.

Coffee Meets Bagel also sells a premium subscription. Subscribers save money by purchasing Beans and gain access to expected yet valuable premium features. See you all who like you. Send more likes per month. Increase the visibility of your profile. Send your message straight to the top of your inbox. Turn on read receipts. Learn more about your matches with activity reports. The subscription costs $35 for one month, $75 for three months, and $120 for six months, which are the standard prices for this category.

As the COVID-19 pandemic subsides, at least in some parts of the world, potential lovers may feel comfortable enough to meet in person. In your Coffee Meets Bagel profile, you can indicate whether you have been vaccinated or not. However, if you still want to play it safe, virtual dates are the best option.

Unfortunately, Coffee Meets Bagel does not have a video chat feature. Instead, you can personally answer if you want to go on a virtual date with the person you're talking to. If both people agree, they will receive a notification, but they will have to deal with the logistics on their own. At least the Coffee Meets Bagel blog has some virtual dating ideas.

Other dating services offer video chat features so you can go on a virtual date right from the app. Match, Tinder, Bumble, eharmony, POF, and Clover all let you have romantic dates in videos.

Not Quite Caffeinated

The casual and laid-back atmosphere of Coffee Meets Bagel promises you the chance to experience true love with little effort; just pick a few daily matches and hope one of them works. However, you can get the same casual experience by accessing more robust dating features with our Editors' Choice Match. If hot summers are your thing, check out our other Editors' Choice, Tinder.

Pros

Focus on long-term relationships
Daily curated matches
Free with premium extras

Not enough video chat
Few options every day
Simple, dull features
Chats can expire

Essence

Coffee Meets Bagel puts you in touch with fresh match selections every day, but you'll find similar features and many more features on other, better dating apps.

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what personality types are and how they differ, who are ambiverts

Many people think that an introvert and an extrovert are just two sides of the same coin. Will you stay at home on Friday night or meet up with friends? Will you be the center of attention or away from the spotlights? In fact, a person is not white or black, there are no pure types in psychology, experts assure. There are people, for example, very tall or short, but most strive for average values. So it is with extroversion. This is just one of the five main personality traits (openness to new things, conscientiousness, pleasantness, neuroticism), so it cannot completely determine our behavior. Let's take a closer look at what introvert and extrovert mean.

Tags:

Psychology

Psychology of communication

Introvert

extrovert

The famous psychiatrist Carl Jung at the beginning of the 20th century identified types of people - extroverts and introverts. In psychology, this distinction became convenient and popular, and over time began to be used to define a person in ordinary life. Knowing who you belong to, it is easier to understand yourself and choose a circle of friends. Sometimes it seems to us that the world is ruled and dominated by extroverts. Although in reality, they can simply make themselves louder, making more noise. But is the gap really that deep between an introvert and an extrovert? Do the former really need help and support in order to develop their own talents and not remain on the margins?

Everything is not as categorical as it seems at first glance. Yes, open and closed people exist. But there are many examples when an extrovert and an introvert behave in unexpected ways, because each person throughout life demonstrates flexibility and opens up from different angles. And in these categories there is a place for the golden mean. We will talk about it and the main opposites from the point of view of psychology below.

What does introverted personality type mean? The tendency to introversion is manifested if you like to spend time alone with yourself, your thoughts and ideas.

If you do not know how to determine whether you are an introvert or an extrovert, try to find the following main features in yourself. They are characteristic of those who prefer to isolate themselves from the outside world more often.

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love of being alone;
unwillingness to be the center of attention;
one-on-one preference;
first think, then do;
recovery alone;
work in a quiet independent environment;
secrecy.

There is a big difference between introversion and shyness. Shy people are often also afraid of what others will think of them, while introverts do not have negative emotions and such fears.

Just because introverts don't like big groups doesn't mean they can't make friends and relationships. In this sense, they are almost no different from extroverts. In addition, they can make great careers simply by sticking to roles that are likely to be lonely: accounting, engineering, writing, driving trucks, etc.

The main difference between an introvert and an extrovert is the desire to focus more often on their own feelings and thoughts . They are characterized by a greater concentration than representatives of the opposite camp. It is unfair to call them socially isolated, selfish or unhappy people.

Introverts also desire to communicate, show feelings, and care for others. But the difference is that an introvert will do all this with more restraint, "impartiality" than an extrovert. So the talk that people who are less generous with emotions love order too much, are sensitive to negativity, or are “on their own minds” are also groundless. These are already other characteristics, from the category of neuroticism.

How an extraverted personality type manifests itself

It is hard to blame anyone for being passive or loving solitude, but this is an extrovert. He just needs to draw strength from external sources. To shine and find grateful listeners in the society is about them. Hence the significant differences: an extrovert knows how to present himself, and an introvert, no matter how smart and educated, is not always capable of this.

Such people direct their energy outward — to other people and the realization of their ideas. We have looked at personality types in which an introvert manifests itself, and you can compare the main traits with an extrovert.

many acquaintances and friends;
love of attention;
quick decision making;
getting energy from being among people;
enthusiasm and positive attitude;
work in a team or group.

Extroverts tend to get more support from other people when they find themselves in difficult situations. And in general, there is a stereotype that society loves extroverts more, so they more often become leaders and choose sales, marketing, PR and other areas where communication with people is important.

It is important to remember that this is only one of the characteristics. And there is a big difference between a pleasant introvert and a rude extrovert.

By the way, introverts are often referred to as overly sensitive people, unlike extroverts. The latter, they say, go through life easier and are not led to mental troubles. American psychologist and researcher Elaine Eyron has carefully studied the issue of sensitivity and came to curious conclusions. In particular, the writer noticed that Jung singled out in extroverts a love of risk, the ability to enter into a conversation without a shadow of a doubt and speak their mind. In his opinion, introverts are completely incapable of these feats.

And Elaine Ayron believes that about a third of highly sensitive people can be called extroverts. She singled out the concept of "social extrovert", which differs from Jung's introvert in that the former easily make acquaintances and feel confident in crowded places. Otherwise, they are even similar.

The definition of introvert and extrovert can help leaders and managers when working with employees. In particular, when issuing orders. It will be more difficult for an extrovert to cope with a task that requires perseverance and attention to detail. And it is desirable to encourage the initiative of introverts, not allowing extroverts to become "irritants" in the team.

Despite the fact that the extrovert and introvert have significant differences, they are able to get along in the same unit of society. You probably noticed in the company a ringleader and a “quiet woman”, in a pair a more impulsive spouse and her “obedient” husband, and so on. They find compromises and interact with the whole world, and not just representatives of their "clan".

Introvert and extrovert at the same time: ambivert type

As soon as a friend refrains from a verbose conversation or wants to read a book alone on the weekend, you involuntarily begin to write him down as an introvert. Labels are always easier to attach. So there is a feeling that the person was able to “bite through”, which means it will be easier to build an appropriate relationship with him. But you should know that there are not only extrovert and introvert, but also other concepts.

Introverts and extroverts view pleasure differently. Their source for this is different. For one, this is a quiet rest, and for the other, being in the center of attention. But if after a noisy party there comes a desire to sit alone, this is the golden mean. The ambivert is the bridge between the introvert and the extrovert, containing the qualities of both. Psychologists believe that it is mixed personality types that prevail. Barry Smith, professor emeritus and director of the Laboratory of Human Psychophysiology at the University of Maryland, claims that ambiverts make up 68% of the total population.

Thanks to this view, we understand that not everything is so simple in the psychological portraits of people. An ambivert is a cross between an introvert and an extrovert, he has their traits:

flexibility in communication
the ability to appreciate the charms of loneliness
the desire to go out (in doses)
the ability to adapt to the situation

They took the best from two fronts, combining the character of an introvert and an extrovert. According to psychologists, ambiverts become worthy managers because they show leadership qualities and remain reasonable, able to stop and delve into issues. They are equally comfortable shining in society and secluded from prying eyes.

Indiana State University Shyness Research Institute director Bernardo Carducci believes that the prevalence of introversion and extraversion is strongly influenced by genetics. The cross between an extrovert and an introvert - ambiversion - is also a hereditary tendency, not an acquired one.

How to know if you are an introvert, extrovert or ambivert

Most people are in the middle of the extroversion scale. This means that an introvert and an extrovert in their absolute form are extremely rare. And this is very good. Everyone has their own temperament, which reveals our emotionality to one degree or another, reflects actions. But this is only one of the puzzles of the multifaceted nature of man.

Extroverts and introverts, whose characteristics should not be reduced to the peremptory "heart wide open" and "lone wolf", can actually make friends.

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Essence

what personality types are and how they differ, who are ambiverts

What does introverted personality type mean? The tendency to introversion is manifested if you like to spend time alone with yourself, your thoughts and ideas.

How an extraverted personality type manifests itself

Introvert and extrovert at the same time: ambivert type

How to know if you are an introvert, extrovert or ambivert