Things to say when someone is depressed

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Phrases worth saying to a depressed person

A depressed person or in a long-term depressed state requires a special attitude and a special way of communication from us. The form in which we address the sufferer plays a crucial role in this case. Coping with your condition is often impossible alone, and if you really want and are ready to help your loved one, use the hint, it's not so difficult!

1. Is there anything I can do to ease your condition? nine0006

Showing something is not the same as just saying something. Words are not all that can help a depressed person. As a rule, any offer that comes as a "lifeline" is more like a "magic kick". Organic apples? Yoga? All of them are perceived in approximately the same way: "You do something terrible in life, and it's your fault."

What will be much more comfortable to hear from a loved one or friend when you can’t live actively on your own, for example, an offer to help clean the house or an invitation to a cozy restaurant (specific name, date) for lunch or dinner. This may sound like a pampered, self-absorbed child, but don't be afraid to wish such suggestions for those who struggle with the hormones of sadness. Why not help a person in this difficult struggle? nine0003

2. What do you think might help you feel a little better?

In many ways adults remain like small children; If you tell your child to stop eating Skittles because they give you those nasty pimples on your cheeks, it probably won't stop him from stuffing another six in his mouth. This wording of the question leaves a person free to decide on his own. It’s as if you are turning to his “inner assistant”, who in fact always knows what is best. nine0003

3. Is there anything I can do for you?

Again, as in the first point, effective communication is not just said, but done. Even if the crying person just silently shakes his head in response to your question, I assure you: he will hear your offer, and it will already become some support in itself.

4. Can I give you a lift somewhere?

Few people know that depressed people are bad drivers. In fact, they are VERY bad drivers. Medical staff can confirm that driving style can be a good diagnostic of mood disorders. So, perhaps your help can be important not only for a depressed loved one, but also for other people on the road. nine0003

5. Where do you find the most support?

There is a big difference between "Why don't you join a psychotherapy group for depression?" and “You need support. Let's find out what it could be." Do not let your questions sound like an accusation of laziness.

6. You won't always feel this way.

This is the perfect phrase that I would like to hear fifty times a day when I was ready to get out of this world forever. These words do not blame, do not pressure, do not manipulate. What they do is give hope, which keeps a person alive and motivates him to wait for the next day. nine0003

7. What do you think contributed to your depression?

This is a very mild form of expression for the thought: "Your marriage is absolutely destructive to you, you fool!" or “Don’t you think that your witch colleague is too often in a bad mood and pushes you for nothing?” It is better that a person even by the method of "poke" come to some kind of his own conclusions. In addition, in the future, this will deprive him of a reason to lay responsibility for the negative consequences of some of his actions on you. nine0003

8. What time of the day is the hardest for you?

This is one of the best questions. Most often, depression is especially felt in the morning, upon awakening (“Oh, horror, I'm still alive”), and between about three and four in the afternoon, when the level of sugar in the body drops and the level of anxiety rises sharply. The person does not immerse you in the details of his blues, but simply indicates when he needs additional participation and support.

9. I'm here for you. nine0006

It's easy. It's warm. And this means at once everything that a person needs to hear from you: I care about you, I accept it; I can't fully understand your condition, but I love and support you.

10. Nothing.

This is perhaps the most difficult. Because we are used to filling silence, it frightens with a seeming emptiness. Frightened by emptiness, we begin to talk about anything, even the weather. It's also important to be able to listen. Listening to a person, you take what he gives you, and for a depressed person it is already a lot to give something to someone. Sometimes just listening carefully to what is being said means more than understanding the content. Because full attention is a priceless thing that can work wonders. nine0003

Based on contributions from Teresa Borschard, who suffers from chronic depression and author of the project and book Beyond Blues: Escape Depression and Anxiety and Harness the Best of the Bad Genes. ( Beyond Blue: Surviving Depression & Anxiety and Making the Most of Bad Genes )
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What do you say to a depressed person? — HealthInfo

Depression is a serious illness that can lead to death. If someone close to you is experiencing depression, it is important to find the right words that will ease their suffering and not harm them. Read our 7 recommendations on which words help and which do not. nine0068

  1. What is depression?

Usually depression is any depressed mental state. Doctors distinguish between several types of depression, including minor depression and major depression (major depressive disorder), which is considered an illness. Relatives play a big role if they are nearby and ready to surround the patient with love and care.

Words of encouragement:

Say, "You are not alone." nine0003

Avoid the phrase: "Someone is worse off than you."

  1. Support the treatment

If a person breaks their arm, they go to the doctor instead of waiting for the bones to grow together incorrectly. The same with depression. However, people often do not perceive it as a serious illness. Try to tell the patient about the need to visit a doctor. Explain that illness should not be left to chance.

Words of encouragement:

Say: "I will never leave you."

Avoid the phrase: "Try chamomile tea - soothes."

  1. More patience

In no case give vent to irritation if you can no longer tolerate the eternally gloomy person next to you. Get it right on your nose: depression is a disease, not something that can just get on your nerves.

Words of encouragement:

Say, "I can't quite understand how you feel, but I really feel for you."

Avoid the phrase: "Stop feeling sorry for yourself."

  1. Keep your finger on the pulse

You should always be available for a conversation. Suggest to the patient to find a medical specialist and discuss the visit. Only if you know what is going on in the patient's head, you can prevent a possible suicide. Feeling that "it" is approaching, dial the "hot line" or contact the ambulance staff if the patient's life is in danger. nine0003

Words of encouragement:

Repeat: "Let me hug you."

Avoid: “I know how you feel. Once I could not get out of depression for a whole month.

  1. Go in for sports

Call the patient and invite him to a family holiday. Depressed people often remain isolated because they are afraid of "interfering" with other people. Sports games or other types of physical exercises remain ideal - they improve sleep and allow you to quickly achieve the desired results - score a goal, score points, win a tennis set. If the patient does not express a particular desire, do not insist. nine0003

Words of encouragement:

Repeat: "You are very important to me."

Avoid: "Who said life is fair?"

  1. Step by step

A depressed person often asks, “Why should I do anything at all? Why get out of bed? Help him find the answer with a simple technique: every action should be rewarded. Record all the achievements of the day and look at them together - this will give the patient a sense of satisfaction from the work done. nine0003

Words of encouragement:

Repeat: “You can do it, and I will be with you until the end.

Learn more