Describe an introvert person
Signs of an Introvert Personality: Types, Traits & Characteristics
Written by Rachel Reiff Ellis
In this Article
- What Is an Introvert?
- Signs You Might Be an Introvert
- Causes of Introversion
- Types of Introverts
- Introversion Versus Shyness
- Myths About Introverts
What Is an Introvert?
An introvert is a person with qualities of a personality type known as introversion, which means that they feel more comfortable focusing on their inner thoughts and ideas, rather than what’s happening externally. They enjoy spending time with just one or two people, rather than large groups or crowds.
When you hear the word introvert, you might think of someone who's shy or quiet and prefers to be alone. While that may be true for some introverts, there's much more to this personality type. Whether you're an introvert or an extrovert all depends on how you process the world around you.
A psychologist named Carl Jung began using the terms introvert and extrovert (sometimes spelled extravert) in the 1920s. These two personality types sort people into how they get or spend their energy. Introverts, Jung said, turn to their own minds to recharge, while extroverts seek out other people for their energy needs.
Signs You Might Be an Introvert
Around one-third to one-half of all people in the U.S. are introverts. Though it looks different in everyone, introverts have many of the same patterns of behavior. In general, introverts:
- Need quiet to concentrate
- Are reflective
- Are self-aware
- Take time making decisions
- Feel comfortable being alone
- Don't like group work
- Prefer to write rather than talk
- Feel tired after being in a crowd
- Have few friendships, but are very close with these friends
- Daydream or use their imaginations to work out a problem
- Retreat into their own mind to rest
One way to find out if you're an introvert is to take a test, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) or the SAPA project.
Causes of Introversion
Scientists don't know for sure if there's a cause for introversion or extroversion. What they do know is the brains of the two personality types work a little differently from each other. Researchers have found that introverts have a higher blood flow to their frontal lobe than extroverts do. This part of the brain helps you remember things, solve problems, and plan ahead.
Introvert brains also react differently to dopamine than extrovert brains do. That's a chemical that turns on the reward- and pleasure-seeking part of your brain. Introverts and extroverts have the same amount of the chemical, but extrovert brains get an excited buzz from their reward center. Introverts, on the other hand, tend to just feel run-down by it.
Types of Introverts
Being an introvert isn't an all-or-nothing stamp on your personality. Psychologists think of introverts as falling somewhere on a scale. Some people are more introverted than others. Other people fall right in the middle of the scale. They're called ambiverts.
Introverts usually have a few extroverted traits mixed in with their introverted ones, and vice versa. There are a wide range of ways to be an introvert.
One study shows that introverts tend to fall into one of four subtypes:
Social introverts. This is the "classic" type of introvert. Social introverts like small groups and quiet settings over crowds.
Thinking introverts. People in this group are daydreamers. They spend a lot of time in their thoughts and tend to have creative imaginations.
Anxious introverts. They seek out alone time not just because they like it, but also because they often feel awkward or shy around people.
Restrained/inhibited introverts. These introverts think before they act. They aren't likely to make a decision on a whim. Typically they take longer to take action.
Your introverted ways may change over time, and in different settings, too. You're not likely to swing from introvert to extrovert. But it's possible you could become more or less introverted, depending on what's going on in your life.
Introversion Versus Shyness
Many people think of introverts as shy, but the two aren’t linked. Introversion is a personality type, while shyness is an emotion.
People who are shy tend to feel awkward or uncomfortable when they’re in social situations, especially when they’re around strangers. They may feel so nervous, they become sweaty. Their heart may beat quicker, and they may get a stomachache. They may be inclined to skip social events because they don’t like the negative feelings that take over their thoughts and bodies when they have to go to parties or other activities.
People who are introverted also prefer to skip social events, but it’s because they feel more energized or comfortable doing things on their own or with one or two other people. Introverts don’t choose to skip social events because they have strong negative reactions to larger gatherings the way that shy people do; they just prefer being alone or in very small groups.
Myths About Introverts
One common myth about introverts is that they’re shy. Some introverts may be shy, but this is not the case for all introverts. Other myths include:
- Introverts are unfriendly. Being an introvert doesn’t affect how friendly you may be. Some people may think that introverts are unfriendly because they don’t tend to have large groups of friends, and they may reflect on situations quietly rather than joining in on conversations at gatherings.
- Introverts can’t be leaders. Although people may think of an extroverted personality when they imagine a leader, introverts have the skills to be bosses and leaders, too. Some of their qualities make them effective leaders: They listen to their employees’ ideas, they can stay focused on long-term goals, and they may seem less threatening, so people may accept them in their roles.
- It’s hard to get to know introverts. Introverts prefer to have deep friendships with only a handful of people. They may not open up to everyone who wants to small-talk, but the people they’re close with know them very well and develop real friendships with them.
What Is an Introvert? Personality, Characteristics, and More
Being introverted has to do with how you gather energy. You might be introverted if you’re energized by solo time and feel drained after prolonged social interactions. This isn’t necessarily the same as shyness.
When someone asks you to describe an introvert, your thoughts might go to the most reserved and thoughtful person you know. Maybe you think of the friend who mostly avoids special attention and social engagements, or the sibling who prefers to occupy a quiet corner with a book or the family dog.
But what if you’re the one who prefers a quiet night at home to a crowded party? Maybe you feel exhausted and drained after interacting with anyone other than a close friend or two. If so, you might have started to wonder whether you’re an introvert yourself.
Introversion itself isn’t a measurable personality trait, as such. Rather, introversion refers to low levels of extroversion (originally referred to as extraversion; a person with extraversion traits was referred to as an extravert).
Extroversion is one of the Big Five personality traits. People with higher levels of extroversion tend to:
- seek out social interaction and conversations
- thrive in busy environments
- have a more outgoing nature
- express themselves easily
- enjoy being in a crowd
- act more impulsively
- avoid spending time alone
Since introversion lies on the other end of the spectrum, it tends to have the opposite characteristics. Introverts generally:
- do better in quiet environments
- enjoy spending time alone
- show more reservation than enthusiasm in social settings
Introversion types
Most commonly acknowledged signs of introversion don’t come from the actual definition of introversion — which is, basically, a lack of extroversion.
In a 2011 study, researchers outlined four domains of introversion that align with the characteristics people often link to this personality trait:
- Social describes the tendency to prefer spending time in smaller groups of people or alone.
- Thinking describes the tendency to spend a lot of time absorbed in your imagination and the inner landscape of your thoughts.
- Anxious reflects the need to spend time alone because the company of other people prompts feelings of shyness, social awkwardness, or lack of confidence. Alone, you might ruminate on past experiences or worry about future ones.
- Inhibited simply means you’re more likely to act with restraint than impulse. You tend to keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself, and you generally won’t pursue thrills and new sensations until you’ve taking plenty of time to consider your choices.
Your particular flavor of introversion might blend any of these four elements.
A number of factors help shape the unique characteristics that make you who you are, and these factors can also affect the ways introversion shows up in your personality. To put it another way, no two introverts are exactly alike.
That said, you might recognize introversion in yourself by some of the following traits and behaviors.
You need plenty of time for yourself
Do you consider periods of solitude essential for optimal health and well-being? Maybe you find the thought of a quiet night at home positively delightful, whether you plan to spend that time simply resting or enjoying a quiet hobby on your own.
If time alone prompts feelings of peace and relief, not disappointment and stress, you’re likely more introverted than extroverted.
Too much socializing drains you
It’s not true that introverts hate social interaction and avoid it entirely. All the same, you might find yourself needing more time to recharge between events than a more extroverted person.
Hanging out with friends on Friday might max out your energy, leaving you craving solitude on Saturday to rest and refuel.
You have a hard time with conflict
Everyday interactions can be draining enough on their own, but what about situations that involve the possibility of conflict?
Some evidence suggests introverted people tend to have a greater sensitivity to negative evaluation and criticism. You might find it tough to share your thoughts when you believe others might disagree with you or disapprove of your opinion. As a result, you might find yourself avoiding conflict whenever possible.
You work better on your own
The mere words “group project” might spark fear in anyone’s heart, but if you find working in groups particularly loathsome, you could certainly be more of an introvert.
Working at your own pace gives you time to reflect and consider your approach before focusing your energy on the task, without having to navigate group dynamics or tune out the chatter.
Of course, this doesn’t necessarily mean you have trouble getting along with others. You may just find it easier to concentrate when working alone. That goes for your hobbies, too — introverted people often choose solitary pastimes, like reading, crafting, gaming, or gardening.
The spotlight doesn’t tempt you
Maybe you don’t mind working in smaller groups, but you always choose behind-the-scenes roles.
That might mean you’d rather do the research and write up the report than present it, or you volunteer for tasks that keep you away from the crowd. Far from being the center of attention, you’d rather hover on the fringes where you escape notice.
You prefer a close circle of friends
Many introverts have just a small circle of friends, but it’s not because they can’t make friends or dislike people. Research suggests, in fact, that high-quality relationships play a major role in happiness for introverts.
If you’re an introvert, you might simply prefer to have a few close, intimate friendships rather than a large circle of casual acquaintances. After all, you need more time to yourself than an extroverted person might, so you probably have less time to spend connecting and catching up with a crowd.
You get to know people on a deeper level
If you tend to keep to yourself, you might find it perfectly natural to listen and observe from the sidelines. Watching what goes on around you can give you more insight into others and offer clues to their personality and preferences.
Expressing yourself not your strong point? You might become a good listener instead, perhaps even develop a knack for picking up on body language and less obvious cues and emotions in someone’s words, behavior, or tone of voice.
The end result? You learn more about others, which can boost empathy and your ability to offer emotional support.
You spend a lot of time absorbed in your own thoughts
Maybe you:
- find yourself daydreaming or running through scenarios in your mind before you settle on a plan of action
- need more time to process information and weigh options carefully when making decisions
- do extensive research before making a big purchase or accepting a job offer
- brainstorm a plan of action ahead of major events to prepare for every possibility
Introverts often have an active inner thought process, so these traits can all suggest introversion.
You zone out to get away
Do you catch yourself “escaping” from unpleasant or stressful situations by letting your mind wander or drift to something more relaxing?
Anyone can zone out, but turning inward may offer introverts a way to leave situations that feel chaotic or uncomfortable. In short, it can serve as a survival mechanism, of sorts.
This tendency to get lost in your thoughts may leave others with the impression that you’re shy, distracted, or disinterested. In reality, though, it can help you cope in tense or overwhelming environments, from a loud holiday party to a long meeting with several short-tempered colleagues.
You prefer writing over talking
Maybe the thought of small talk makes you shudder, but writing out your thoughts comes naturally, especially when you’re dealing with complex or difficult emotions.
Many introverts take time to think carefully before speaking, so you might have a hard time offering a quick opinion about anything. Writing, on the other hand, allows you to consider your position thoroughly and choose just the right words to express yourself with confidence and care.
You feel emotions deeply
Some evidence suggests introverted people might experience emotions more intensely and have trouble managing those emotions. This greater sensitivity could help explain why many introverts develop depression.
Learn more about the complex link between introversion and depression.
A heightened sensitivity to emotions and other stimuli can factor into your preference for spending your time with loved ones who recognize and understand your need for space and solitude. You want to share your energy with people you can trust not to overwhelm you, in other words.
Introversion, like other aspects of personality, develops as a combination of two main factors: genes and environment.
Your genetic makeup, or traits inherited from your biological parents, plays a key role in determining where you fall on the personality continuum.
There’s a good chance someone born into a family of introverts will go on to develop an introverted personality themselves — but only in part because of the genes that contribute to personality.
The environment you grow up in also has an important impact. In short, observing how family members behave and respond in social settings can help shape your personality.
Other environmental factors might include:
- parenting style
- the type of education you receive
- experiences with peers
- life experiences, especially in childhood
Some evidence suggests brain chemistry may also play a part.
A 2007 study of 130 Russian participants suggests people with higher levels of extroversion may respond differently to dopamine, a neurotransmitter essential for your brain’s reward system.
In short, extroverts get a jolt of satisfaction or energy from social interactions because of dopamine. Introverts, by contrast, might simply feel overstimulated.
In another study from 2018, researchers considered data from 127,685 participants living in 73 parts of the world. Their results suggest a link between dopamine function and personality traits like extroversion and neuroticism — in stressful or demanding climates only.
Researchers theorized this may have something to do with risk avoidance. People with a high-functioning dopamine system might pursue the reward of connection regardless of the risk involved.
Those with a less functioning dopamine system, on the other hand, might feel more inclined to avoid others to increase their personal sense of safety.
You can certainly be both shy and introverted. That said, shyness and introversion represent two distinct traits.
Unlike introversion, shyness doesn’t have anything to do with how you expend and regain energy. (So yes, you can be a shy extrovert.)
Shyness often fades as you adjust to a new situation and become comfortable in your surroundings. For example, you might not feel much like striking up a conversation on the first day of school, but by the second week, you might feel relaxed enough to chat with classmates.
Consistent acceptance from others can also help ease feelings of shyness going forward. Introversion, however, remains more of a fixed part of your personality.
We’ve established that introversion isn’t just another way to describe shyness, but plenty of other myths about introversion exist. A few common ones include:
- Introverts don’t like people. In reality, introverted people do benefit from close relationships with others, just like most other humans. They typically just prefer to save their social energy for people who understand and support their needs.
- Introverts have social anxiety. Sure, some introverted people could also have social anxiety. But that’s thanks to a combination of personality traits, like conscientiousness and neuroticism, rather than introversion alone.
- Introverts are more imaginative and creative. Creativity stems from openness, another Big Five trait. Introverted people with high levels of openness might easily be more creative, but this won’t apply to every introvert.
- Introverts just need to try harder to be social. If you’re happy with yourself as you are and don’t feel the need to change any of your social habits, draining your energy by trying to force yourself to interact with others when you need time alone will probably only leave you miserable and stressed.
Psychologist Carl Jung, who first described extroversion and introversion in the 1920s, noted that introverts and extraverts could be separated based on how they regain energy. Introverts, his basic definition said, prefer minimally stimulating environments, and they need time alone to recharge. Extraverts refuel by being with others.
Today, we know most people aren’t purely introverted or purely extroverted. People generally fall somewhere along the spectrum, with elements of both traits.
You could also be an ambivert.
Some mostly introverted people might enjoy acting on stage or throwing parties, while people who identify as extroverts could still seek solitude from time to time, perhaps when they need to focus on a challenging project.
Introversion is simply part of your personality. It’s not a flaw or anything you need to change or alter.
There’s nothing wrong with needing a lot of time alone, preferring your own company, or having just a few friends. What really matters is that you feel comfortable with your personality and accept yourself as you are.
Keep in mind, too, that while personality does remain fairly stable over your life, it’s not entirely set in stone. If you’d like to explore new ways to connect with others and expand your circle, try these 10 tips for making friends as an introvert.
Extroverts, introverts, ambiverts: who they are and how to work with them
The company's team consists of a large number of people with different characters. In order for an HR specialist to effectively interact with employees, understand their motivation, know which work is comfortable for them and which is not, you need to be able to determine the personality type of specialists. There are three types of personality types: extroverts, introverts and ambiverts.
In our new article, you will learn what these types of people are and how to interact with them for productive work. nine0003
Extrovert: Distinctive Characteristics and Secrets of Interaction
Extroverts are the “lighters” of the company that are open to the world and directed towards people. They are very sociable and easily get along with people. As a rule, extroverts quickly get used to the new team and can carry on any conversations.
Extroverts are filled with energy if there are a lot of people around them. The book Cognitive, Affective, and Behavioral Neuroscience states that there are two types of extroverts:
- Active. Their key characteristics are assertiveness, success leadership, perseverance. Active extroverts like to be the center of attention and very often occupy leadership positions.
- Affiliates. Friendly, open and sincere guys. They easily find contact with new people and value their loved ones very much, because relationships mean a lot to them.
The main characteristics of extroverts:
- love to be the center of attention;
- do not like routine and monotony, they prefer variety;
- know a lot of people and make contact with strangers easily;
- they are driven by interesting work tasks, they are happy to take on a variety of complex tasks, but only if they are interested;
- first they speak, then they think;
- prefer to talk and talk about themselves than to listen to the interlocutor and try to understand his problem. nine0016
How to work with extroverts and set them tasks: 4 tips from the Hurma team
1. When setting tasks, it is very important to give them time and the opportunity to reason and ask interesting questions. Ask the extrovert for feedback on the task, let him tell you how he understood it, say deadlines and expected results.
2. Extrovert employees should be assigned to projects where they can learn something new for themselves. In addition, it is important to create a “competitive” environment for them, since it is these conditions that motivate them the most. nine0003
3. Give them the opportunity to be in the spotlight, be a mentor to someone, lead a discussion in which they can take the initiative and take action.
4. As a rule, extroverts have adequate self-esteem and are self-confident. But despite this, it is important to praise them and celebrate their achievements.
Introvert: distinctive characteristics and secrets of interaction
An introvert is the exact opposite of an extrovert. Such people focus more on their inner world than on the outside. Introverts are not very sociable, but at the same time, very pleasant interlocutors, if you talk with them on topics that interest them. In addition, if you find an approach to them and make friends, you can learn a lot of interesting things, since these are people with a rich inner world. nine0003
They place the main emphasis on their own knowledge and experience, and not on the views of other people. An introvert likes to read, plan things, work more productively in a calm environment. You can recognize an introvert by the expressions: "I need to think", "I need to analyze", etc.
How to work with introverts and set them tasks: tips from the Hurma team
1. Introverts think a lot and that is why they cannot always answer the question quickly. Give them time to think things over, formulate an answer, study more information. If introverts do not know something, they study the issue, delving into the details. nine0003
2. Be prepared to answer a large number of questions, because it is important for introverts to understand the manager's analytics, why the task needs to be done in this way, on what grounds this or that decision was made.
3. Introverts have one feature similar to extroverts - they also need praise and recognition of their merits. And in principle, praise is important to everyone, do not spare praise, well, really 🙂
4. When working with an introvert and setting a task, accurately calculate the time frame, explain step by step how and what needs to be done. nine0003
5. These are not the kind of people who need to be constantly monitored. If you want to work with an introvert, give him more freedom of action.
6. If you do not have time to communicate with them personally, use e-mail or corporate messengers.
Ambivert: distinctive characteristics and secrets of interaction
Ambivert is the golden mean between a calm introvert and a hyperactive extrovert. Depending on the specific situation, they can behave both as introverts and as extroverts. If they are uncomfortable, they immerse themselves in themselves; if they like the surrounding conditions, ambiverts actively communicate with everyone. nine0003
These people value both social interaction and solitude, when they can be alone and think. Barry Smith, director of the Human Psychophysiology Laboratory at the University of Maryland, claims that 68% of people are ambiverts.
The main signs of ambiverts:
- quickly join a new team and do not experience discomfort when communicating with strangers;
- have empathy, understand and listen to the emotions of other people; nine0016
- they have a wider social circle than introverts;
- they connect with people more deeply than extroverts.
How to work with ambiverts and set them tasks: tips from the Hurma team
1. Ambiverts can work with both routine and interesting tasks. Therefore, if there is monotonous work in the list of tasks, they will do it.
2. If you have difficult tasks, you can entrust their implementation to ambiverts. They are easy-going and not afraid to take risks. nine0003
3. Ambiverts are not afraid of public speaking at events, make many contacts and quickly win over. So they are the first who want to participate in various activities.
4. While working with them, remember that they, like introverts, think a lot, try to analyze all moments and aspects in order to make an informed decision.
Flexibility is key
It is important for HR managers and leaders to consider the personality types of employees in order to entrust them with projects in which they will perform at their best, and not vice versa. For example, if you want an extrovert to do a great job, don't give them a task that requires a lot of attention to detail. nine0003
Encourage introverts to be active when they are active, make sure that there are not too many extroverts and they do not annoy their colleagues.
But, most importantly, remember that there are very few people who are of the extraverted or introverted type. So put in the forefront not what type you or your colleagues are, but flexibility and mutual respect.
Introverts. Psychology Tutorial
Introverts
The easiest way to describe an introverted character is as follows: it is in every way the opposite of an extroverted character Introvert is not sociable, is not trusting, is not talkative, is not able to adapt, etc. In a word, an introverted attitude gives rise to a character that is quite difficult both for the person himself and for the people around him.
In fact, a person from outside will never understand what is going on in the soul of this unsociable person. He is cold, distant, arrogant. At the same time, he is shy and vulnerable. If the introverted attitude is expressed very strongly, it gives rise to a serious internal conflict, which develops in accordance with the rule: that which the human consciousness strenuously refuses does not disappear altogether, but plunges into the unconscious and there acquires its secret (but truly destructive) power.
So, in the unconscious of an extrovert, who seems to be wholly and completely directed to the outside world, lies the most primitive, childish egocentrism. The introvert, on the level of consciousness, renounces all interest, all attachment to objects. As a result, at the very bottom of his soul, it turns out - no, not even interest or affection, but a much more difficult to describe attitude towards the outside world. In its most general form, we can say this: unconsciously, an introvert attaches too much importance to objects, it “seems” to him (out of consciousness!) That some objects or people are endowed with some unthinkable power, from which you need to defend yourself with all your might. In other words, on a conscious level, an introvert underestimates objects, but unconsciously he overestimates them , endows them with truly magical properties and experiences almost primal horror in front of them.
Since the process proceeds unconsciously, the introvert himself knows nothing about it, of course. But this reassessment of the object can just be very noticeable to an attentive observer: it is precisely this that gives rise to a suspicious, wary attitude of the introvert towards people, things and events. Unlike "down to earth" extroverts, introverts are often superstitious; despite all their suspicion, it is they who usually have no doubts about the existence of various kinds of magic, witchcraft and otherworldly forces. And this, in general, is not surprising - for them, after all, the whole world around them is “on the other side”! Perhaps extrovert readers are already beginning to resent and wonder: “But what kind of people are they - they consciously turn away from everything, unconsciously they are afraid of everything! Why are they needed at all?!” nine0003
Well, first of all, introverts, to tell the truth, are also sometimes surprised: why did nature create these noisy and annoying extroverts? Secondly, let us remind once again: the portraits of both types drawn by us are very conditional and depict "extreme" variants of the expression of one or another attitude. The character, thoughts, feelings and behavior of living people (whatever type they belong to) are, of course, immeasurably more complex and varied. And thirdly, if we continue the conversation at this general level, the “usefulness” of introverts has already been substantiated by us to some extent: remember the reasoning about scientists-extroverts and introverts? nine0003
Due to his detachment, an introvert is able to comprehend general connections and patterns between events or objects. If an extrovert, keen on finding and accumulating facts, often “does not see the forest for the trees”, then this danger does not threaten an introvert. Of the numerous features of the object, an introvert can single out the most essential, necessary for the construction of a theory or law. The introvert is not involved in what is happening around him, and this detachment often helps him to see and understand what is not available to the eyes of the extrovert, who is always in the thick of things. nine0003
Unfortunately, the "theoretical" understanding of the introvert usually does not find any practical application. In real life, among concrete people and things, an introvert always remains a stranger. He is sure that he is right (and, perhaps, he has every reason for that), but he does not know how to convince at all: he simply does not find it necessary to prove his point of view to anyone, believing that absolute truth does not require proof or justification. It exists in accordance with the principle: "There are two opinions: one is mine, the other is erroneous." nine0003
If suddenly an introvert comes up with the idea of starting a business, he will almost certainly be doomed to failure. Such a person can be well versed in his business, have great knowledge and excellent intuition, but he will be destroyed ... by a dismissive attitude towards competitors. Unlike the extrovert, for whom competitors (like any objects of the outside world) are certainly real and therefore worthy of careful study, the introvert simply does not think that he may have rivals. He does his job as he sees fit, and what everyone else is doing there is completely uninteresting to him. And when one fine day it suddenly turns out that these very “unworthy” competitors have bypassed him in all respects, he will wave his hand and say: “Well, of course, are they (i.e. customers or buyers) able to understand what true quality?..”
It must be said that an introvert in a family is not exactly the same as an introvert in business or an introvert in general among people. Some coldness and isolation are always present in his character, but in relation to the closest people, an introvert experiences (and shows in his own way, slightly awkwardly) a very strong attachment, even dependence. Here, perhaps, the same feature of the introvert, which we have already spoken about, affects: the unconscious reassessment of external objects.
In the most general terms, this can be described as follows: in general, people are not very interested in and attract an introvert. So, if someone managed to approach him at close range, attract and interest him in something, then this person apparently has some special virtues (or even some kind of secret power). Approximately such an idea is hidden in the unconscious depths of the psyche of an introvert. And therefore, he can not only become attached to a loved one, but fall into a real dependence on him. A "tamed" introvert can be manipulated using this addiction, but seriously, we wouldn't advise anyone to try it. nine0003
And it's not even about moral, ethical prohibitions (although they shouldn't be discounted!). Using the boundless affection of an introvert for your own purposes, maintaining and strengthening his dependence on yourself, you play completely unknowable and very powerful unconscious forces that can get out of control at any moment - both yours and their own "owner" - an introvert. Manipulation and blackmail according to the principle: “Do as I want, otherwise I will fall out of love and leave!” - generally do not bring anyone to good and never. nine0003
But if you treat a practical and unforgiving extrovert in this way, then things can still get by with “little blood”: for some time he will probably obey, then he will learn to ignore such threats, but actually ... objects of interest to him there is always a lot around, and if he is too “get it” in his own family, he will switch his attention to something else (or someone else) without any special worries.
The reaction of an introvert will be much sharper and more dramatic. He will obey until his dependence on you finally becomes apparent to himself; and, having made such a discovery, he will break the connection resolutely and mercilessly - after all, his conscious attitude implies self-sufficiency and independence! At the same time, introverts, unlike their "wide" counterparts, are often vindictive. nine0003
And, finally, introverted overattachment to an object is always closely intertwined with an unconscious, almost mystical fear of its (the object's) power, and fear always sooner or later gives rise to aggression. So we strongly advise you to give up the temptation to push around the "weak-willed" and "unresponsive" introvert in advance. In a still pool, as you know, who just does not live! ..
Strengths of an introvert:
- perfectly able to capture the essence of any problem, separating the main from the insignificant; nine0003
- does not focus on trifles and often finds non-standard solutions to difficult issues;
- capable of a very deep, sincere and lasting attachment to his loved ones.
Weaknesses of an introvert:
- always, even in a narrow family circle, seems a little distant and cold; in other words, even experiencing warm feelings, he does not know how to express them;
- due to his inability (and unwillingness) to express his feelings, thoughts, considerations and intentions, he often acts in an unpredictable way for other people. nine0003
Belonging to one psychological type or another plays a particularly important role in relationships. The simplest rule is this: harmonious relationships (personal, friendly or professional) are usually only possible in couples consisting of representatives of different types. Remember the eastern symbol - Yin and Yang? The two beginnings complement each other and form a single whole. Try to depict the same symbol, consisting of two Yang or two Yin - it turns out “typically wrong” ...
Two introverts - solid passivity, expectation (in vain) of initiative from a partner; two extroverts - a short-lived firework, fading, because the partners are not inclined to seriously listen to each other, strive to satisfy only their own needs and poorly calculate the long-term consequences. nine0003
Unfortunately, often people prefer partners of the same type simply because it seems to be a more familiar and understandable option. Meanwhile, a bold step towards a “stranger” of the opposite type can significantly enrich the experience of relationships and, in general, turn out to be very successful!
This text is an introductory fragment.