How do you find love
How to Find Love With The Right Person in 2022
Finding love with the right person has never been easier. Now, you no longer have to be at the right place at the right time to meet someone you’re compatible with. With online dating and a bit of science, you can easily find people you’re compatible with. As long as you put yourself out there a bit, you’ll be able to find a lasting love. In this article, we’ll share how to find love with the right person in the digital age using our own personal experiences of finding love ourselves. So, let’s dive into the dating tips you’ll need to meet the person of your dreams.
How to Find Love: 13 Tips to Finding Love
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1. Try Online Dating
Believe it or not, you can definitely find love online. We’ll be the first to admit that those first couple of dates with the right match might be awkward as you learn to translate online chemistry offline, but with the right person it is possible. One of the amazing things about online dating is that you can select profiles based on sexual orientation, birthday, compatibility tests, and more. If you know what qualities you look for in a lasting relationship, then you’ll be able to sort through profiles based on those characteristics.
One of the amazing things about finding love through an online dating site is that most single people are on one and you’ll find people who might be shyer or more introverted on a dating site. So, it really does open up the type of people who are looking to date. One piece of advice for finding love online is to give it a few dates unless you spot a serious red flag. Some people are more reserved or nervous on first dates. You’d be surprised at how an awkward first date can lead to a happy marriage years later. That’s exactly what happened to me. Give people a chance to let their true selves shine through.
2. Zodiac Compatibility Based on Science
We’ll be the first to admit that zodiac compatibility can sound a bit woo-woo.
But funny story, a famous mathematician named Gunter Sachs decided to figure out once and for all if there was any merit to zodiac signs and marriage. And funny enough, his data showed that certain zodiac signs were more likely to get married and more likely to get divorced. Years ago, I decided to test his theory for myself. Since all my previous relationships didn’t last long, I wanted to see if I could find love based on my zodiac sign. His studies showed that Capricorn women were most likely to marry Capricorn men. So I decided to date only Capricorn men for a couple months. After dates with three different Capricorn men, the third one is the person I ended up marrying. We’ve been together for almost eight years. So, maybe there is some truth to his study.
Capricorn men and Capricorn women
Aries men and Aries women
Taurus men and Libra women
Gemini men and Gemini women
Leo men and Aries women
Virgo men and Virgo women
Libra men and Libra women
Scorpio men and Pisces women
Sagittarius men and Sagittarius women
Sagittarius men and Aries women
Aquarius men and Aquarius women
Pisces men and Scorpio women
3.
Be At Peace with Your Relationship Status If you’re desperate to find love, you won’t find it. Often, you’ll hit this point where you’ll realize nothing you’re doing is working. Instead of dating, you’ll take a break from the search. This is your opportunity to improve yourself, build yourself up, and get in the right mindset. Shortly, after coming out of this break and trying again you will find love again. This is because while dating many people can help you determine what you like or don’t like, it’s a superficial way of getting to know people. You only ever scratch the surface. It’s that moment where you’re in a clear head, at peace with yourself, and ready to really focus on getting to know another person instead of obtaining a relationship status that you’ll realize you’ve started building a relationship in the first place. Being single isn’t a negative experience. It can be a really enlightening opportunity to focus on fulfilling your own needs and determining who you want to be.
Don’t chase relationship statuses or people because that’s not love.
4. Explore Different Hobbies
To find love you need to know who you are. And believe it or not, most people have no idea who they are because they’re constantly changing. There may be people you’d be really compatible with if you went beyond your typical habits to explore different hobbies. Explore activities beyond what you typically do to cross paths with new people and personality types. By doing this, you’ll have a better understanding of what values you look for in a person. At a certain point in life, people realize they’ve been living in a bubble. So take time to pop the bubble you’re in to explore the world, different activities, cultures, and people. On an important note, sometimes your interests won’t line up with other people, and that’s okay. You don’t need to a clone of yourself to find love and stability in a relationship. It’s okay to have a few differences, that’s what keeps things interesting.
5. Just Get to Know People with Curiosity
Most people spend their dates trying to convince people to date them. They try to sell you on all the amazing things they’ve done. But the secret to finding love is to get to know someone else. To find a lasting love, you need to be honest about whether the other person showed any interest in getting to know you. Did they ask you any questions based on what you told them? If not, they’re likely not your best match.
Ultimately, you want to find someone you want to learn more about and who wants to learn more about you. Otherwise, it’s just infatuation based on physical appearance. Who is the person at the core? That’s the exciting part. Every single person on the planet has a few amazing experiences and stories that led to who they are, focus on unravelling those stories out of them. You’d be amazed at how interesting everyone can be.
6. Take Care Of Yourself
Have you been taking care of yourself lately? For example, do you take care of your physical health and mind? Are you practicing self care? To love someone else, you need to love yourself first.
But if you’ve fallen into a hopeless depression from a recent divorce or breakup, this isn’t the time to find love. The goal of a new relationship isn’t to replace an old one. With a new relationship, you’re creating something new and different. After all, you should be dating someone completely different than your ex considering that relationship didn’t work out in the first place. So make sure you’re regularly taking care of yourself. Go for walks, eat healthy, shower daily, brush your teeth, fix your hair, and invest in your personal growth. When you’re at your best, you’ll attract others who are at their best too. And that’s a dating tip that’ll help you find love with the right person.
7. Be Optimistic Around People
A negative person will attract negativity, drama, and chaos in relationships. They’ll falsely assume it’s the other person when really it’s how they approach the relationship. There are plenty of amazing books on how to learn to be more optimistic. When you finally master optimism, you’ll notice that your relationships don’t involve walking on eggshells.
All the fighting you might’ve done in your previous relationship immediately stops. The more positive you are towards others, the more effort and love they’ll put into the relationship because they feel valued and appreciated. And then, they’ll slowly give you the uplifting optimism back to you because they’re always in a positive mental state. People will react to you based on how you treat them. So keep the mood positive and uplifting and all your previous problems will drift away.
8. Be Kind to Everyone
The best way to attract a good love is by being kind to everyone you meet. You’d be surprised at how much people need kindness in the world. Take a chance on people by always going out of your way to be kind. In the morning each day ask yourself, “how can I make a stranger’s day?” Instead of doing it with the intent of finding your soulmate, do it with the intent to naturally boost your vibe. People who do good deeds daily tend to be happier in general and that’s what will help you find love.
You might realize you find love not from a romantic partner but from new friends and strangers. And that might just be the temporary fulfillment you need to feel at peace with being single so that you eventually do meet the right person.
9. Say No to Infatuation
You’ll never find love if you’re attracted to the wrong things about a person. You can’t fall in love with someone on the first date. It’s impossible. On a first date, people are trying their best to appear at their best. Rather than falling for someone’s appearance, ambition, or success, take the time to get to know people at their core. Practice mindful dating here. You’re going to have to shut down infatuation. That means sometimes someone you’re seriously attracted to, gets a no to a five date because you know that the spark will fade. While physical appearance helps enhance chemistry, it shouldn’t be the foundation of a relationship.
10. Put Yourself Out There
You’ll never find love with the right person, if the right person can never find you.
That means, you’re going to have to crawl out of your shell to be found. While you can hide behind online profiles for a while, eventually you need to take that step and go on a first date. Putting yourself out there means being confident enough to let your true colors show. Let people see you for you. There might be a few people who don’t appreciate your quirky humor. But eventually that trait you’re kind of shy about will be the exact reason why someone loves you. So, let people see the real you, unfiltered.
11. Opposites Attract, Similarities Last
While opposites attract, it’s actually similarities that last. We tend to be most compatible with people who are similar to us. Rather than being with someone with polar opposite values or traits that are in direct conflict to ours, having more similarities is what creates stability and peace in a relationship. You don’t need to be with a clone version of yourself to be happy. Some differences in interests and hobbies are healthy and allows you both to learn from one another.
But if there’s more differences than similarities, you might end up in a relationship with more conflict than you’d like. Focus on the values you appreciate and look for someone who shares the same ones. That way, you can have a healthy and loving relationship.
12. Confirm Your Needs
Have you ever sat down and made a checklist of what your three needs are in a relationship? Did you make sure that the items on your checklist aren’t superficial? If your checklist has items like good looking, good career, or educated, it’s likely that you won’t find love. You’re set out looking for infatuation. For example, what is the value in someone being educated? What if they dropped out of school but built a multi-million dollar business at 19? Are you going to reject them because they don’t have an education? Or is it maybe ambition that you value more? Or possibly the ability to communicate well? Ultimately, when choosing a life partner, you want to make sure you’re choosing values for a lasting relationship.
So, look over your list carefully, and dig deep into the core values you need to have stability in love.
13. Be With Someone You Can Spend the Day With
One of the most important aspects of how to find love is finding someone you want to spend your day with. Absolutely anyone can find someone to spend a night with but does the person want to hang out with you during the day? Can you picture yourself hanging out at a park or going for a long walk after lunch? Do you laugh for hours after having long in-person conversations with them? Or do they only hang out with you after dark because sex is the only thing on their mind? Sex is an important part of a healthy relationship but it’s not the only part of it. If someone isn’t willing to spend their days with you, it’s time to let them go.
Does Everybody Find Love Eventually?
If you want to find love, of course you’ll find love. That doesn’t mean that any person you choose will love you. But with time, experience, and a strong understanding of what you’re looking for in a long-term relationship or marriage, you will find love.
If you want something bad enough in life, you will always get it if you put in the work. So, get to know more people, say yes to dates, ask people out, and give yourself a chance to find the love you’re looking for.
Can You Find Love After Divorce?
Of course, you can find love after divorce. Sometimes, relationships end so that new, better relationships can take place. This could be your big opportunity to finally find your perfect match and lifelong happiness. Still, you want to take some time to heal from your divorce if it left you feeling hurt to prevent carrying over damage to the next person. But once, you’re ready to mingle again, take the time to go on dates. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been divorced at 30, 40, 50, 60, or even 70. You can find love at any age after a divorce.
Is it possible to find love after 30,40, 50 or 60?
Age doesn’t matter in love. You can find love at any age as long as you put yourself out there and get to know single people.
Some say that finding love in later life can be a wonderful experience since you’ve grown so much over the years. So, don’t panic if you find yourself newly single in your 30s, 40s, 50s, or 60s, you can find love at any stage in life. At these ages, you have a strong understanding of who you are and what you value, which is exactly what will help you find lasting love once and for all.
Conclusion
In this article, we covered 13 ways to find love with the right person. It’s important to remember that you can find love online, in-person, or at an event. You never know when you’ll bump into the right person. So, keep your eyes open, wear your heart on your sleeve, be kind at every opportunity, and get to know people on a deeper level. And remember, it doesn’t matter how old you are. You can find love at any age. As long as you’re alive, love is everywhere. And it’s waiting for you to find it.
12 basic rules for lasting relationships
Just because the whole world seems to obsess about romance during one day in the middle of February, doesn't mean you have to.
For happy singles, it's a good excuse to eat chocolate.
But if Valentine's Day has you thinking about finding love, the holiday could be a good motivation to start.
Our experts offered these 12 tips to boost your chances:
1. The ‘You’ll find love when you’re not looking’ approach may be wrong.
That’s like saying, “You’ll find a job when you’re least looking for it,” said Pepper Schwartz, a relationship expert and sociology professor at the University of Washington. It’s possible, but rarely happens.
“For the most part, people who wait for a job are unemployed,” she added. “For me, it’s just an excuse for being scared to go and put the effort in. Yes, it happens, but no, it’s not a good strategy.”
Schwartz does agree with the underlying sentiment of that saying: Don’t be desperate. Put the effort in to find someone, but don’t act like any breathing body will do.
RELATED: How to find lifetime love: 10 secrets from couples married for decades
2.
Go where people like the same things you like.You can skip singles events if you don’t like them, but you have to go where you can meet people, Schwartz advised. Join social groups or meet-ups; be a worker bee in a cause you believe in; get involved in political parties. At the very least, you’re doing something you like and at the very best, you'll meet somebody like-minded.
Bite the bullet and try online dating for a big pool of potential candidates, Schwartz added. If you’re already online, try a different dating site.
3. Look up from your phone.
Good men and good women are everywhere — if you’re looking, noted Bela Gandhi, a TODAY contributor and founder of the Smart Dating Academy in Chicago. She’s amazed people often complain they don’t meet anyone, but then go out and keep their heads down the entire time, staring at their devices.
Wherever you are, be present and look around the room to see who is looking at you. Make three seconds of eye contact with the cute stranger and smile — that’s an invitation for him to come over and talk to you, she advised.
RELATED: Looking for love? These are the top states for 'positive relationships'
4. Don’t seek romance, seek partnership.
Romance is for dates, and it’s fun to have on occasion in your marriage, but it’s partnership that will get you through the rough times, said Tina B. Tessina, a California psychotherapist also known as "Dr. Romance" and author of “How to be Happy Partners: Working it out Together.”
“Don’t look for someone who sweeps you off your feet. That indicates a control freak, and you won’t like what happens later,” she advised. “Look for someone who likes give-and-take, who seeks your opinion and considers it, who cares about what you want, too.”
5. Happy people attract people.
Maybe the biggest issue in not being able to find love is that you’re not feeling good about yourself. Like yourself and like your life — really work on that, Schwartz advised. You have to be the person that you’d want to meet.
“If you’re not a happy, positive, self-confident person, you cut your chances of being in the right space for the right kind of person,” she said.
Go to a therapist to see why you’re depressed; get a trainer if you haven’t been exercising, and visit a nutritionist to begin eating right. If you’re shy, realize you could be less shy.
“The idea is that you have to train for everything, and you have to train for love as well,” Schwartz said. “You can work on yourself. You’re not a finished product unless you’re dead.”
RELATED: Does dating feel like an 'unpaid internship'? Author's advice to find love
6. Take time to be by yourself.
It’s important after a divorce or any break-up after a long relationship to take some time to be alone, said Nicole Baras Feuer, a divorce coach with Start Over Smart in Westport, Connecticut.
“You will be in better shape to meet the ‘right’ person if you have time to heal, spend time alone to figure out who you are again, reflect on what went wrong,” Feuer said. “So you don't repeat the same mistakes over and over again.”
7. Instant sexual attraction often fades.
Most good love is a slow burn — it takes a while to develop, Gandhi said. She believes attraction is important, but you don’t have to feel it right away since that instant spark is more about lust and less about the stuff of real relationships.
Emotion can change and deepen over time so give people a fair shot, Feuer added.
8. Beware of the ‘opposites attract’ theory.
Opposites attract at first, but they’ll likely face major friction points down the road.
Like-minded people actually make for easier and healthy long-term relationships, said Dr. Gail Saltz, a New York psychiatrist. The more you see eye-to-eye on, the less there is to argue and compromise about.
RELATED: Opposites attract? Why you should date someone more like you
9. Become a ‘psychotic optimist’.
“That means you believe at any cost that you’re going to find that love; love is meant for you and it will come to you so that you just have to date like hell until you find it,” Gandhi said.
You have to embrace the process of dating, so adopting a “psychotic optimist” mindset will make it more fun once you’re convinced true love is really out there for you. Gandhi recommends dating three to five people at the same time until you find one to be exclusive with. Dating means “casually getting to know,” not sleeping with someone. She advises not having sex until you’re in a committed, exclusive relationship.
10. Understand your own needs.
Do you need a lot of space? Desire lots of affection? Have to know what’s going on all the time?
“Whatever your style is, it’s OK, but you need to know it and be able to communicate it to your future spouse. You can train each other if you both know what you need,” Tessina said.
11. Know the difference between fooling around and building a real relationship.
“You can mess around with anyone if you’re careful and have safe sex,” Tessina noted. “But before you bring someone into your life, or share money or living space, remember they’re bringing baggage.
”
The person you’re dating is on their best behavior in the beginning, she advised. It gets worse later, not better, so get to know what’s hidden before going too far.
12. Stop pining for someone who is unavailable.
Make yourself understand that holding on to somebody who isn’t interested or isn’t there for you is harmful, and move on.
“You have to see that as a big dark black pit that you have to climb out of or you’ll be buried in it,” Schwartz advised.
Follow A. Pawlowski on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.
how to find your other half
Are you looking for a soul mate and soul mate? Here are ten working rules to help you along the way!
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Everyone has a different attitude to the phrase "soulmates".
Some people think that they are just people who look alike. Others are sure that we are talking about high matters: a soul divided into parts and living simultaneously in two people who will certainly meet. But whatever you consider true love to be, here are ten tips to help you find it.
Do not self-medicate! In our articles, we collect the latest scientific data and the opinions of authoritative health experts. But remember: only a doctor can diagnose and prescribe treatment.
Be yourself
True love is when you are loved for who you are. And if you hide it, then how will a man understand that you are his soul mate? Figure out who you are, never be ashamed of it, develop your strengths and fight those you don't like (after all, antipathy towards them is also part of you). Nothing new: first love yourself, and then others will be able to do the same.
Don't look for perfection
The clearer the image (blue-eyed athletic brunette under 35, works as an architect, loves cats and travel), the more likely you are to miss your real soulmate.
More than once or twice we have heard stories of women truly falling in love with men who, at first glance, seemed to them completely unsuitable partners. Sometimes it takes time to understand: this plump (or even bald!) blond dog man is better than all the brunettes, taken together even with Tom Hiddleston.
Don't expect everything to be perfect all at once
We get nervous on dates and do a lot of stupid things. We tell ridiculous jokes, for some reason we begin to explain long and confusingly who Tanya was mentioned in passing, we show photos of pets for a long time in the hope that this will give time to come up with a good topic for conversation. It's okay if things didn't go the way you wanted. If you like a person, give him a second chance: most likely, when he stops being nervous, you will get the very date that you wanted.
Take your time
If someone's clock is ticking, then let him watch them. And you need time to understand: this person is exactly the one who is needed. Don't be afraid to go or go on dates or refuse them to think: what exactly do I need? There is nothing wrong with taking a step back. Maybe it is needed in order to return to the fork and go in another direction that will lead you to the goal.
Invest in yourself, not in research
Use every possible way to get to know yourself. Try new activities, study, travel, train. You see something interesting - do not hesitate to spend time getting in touch with it. In search of a soulmate, this works much better than trying to visualize the man of your dreams - if only because there will be more real guys in your life from which you can choose.
Don't follow your emotions
Chemistry and butterflies in the stomach are great, but they don't mean that you have a soul mate in front of you. Do not rush to declare someone a soul mate just because at the sight of this man, feelings are born that no other person has evoked before.
Especially when it happens after good sex: the hormone of affection oxytocin produced during it is another traitor who has deceived more than one woman.
Look for someone who accepts you
No “I wish you lost weight” or “I'll get married if you love to cook”. You are who you are and should change only when you yourself want it. Do you have disagreements? This is fine. But when you discuss them, you should not leave for a second the feeling that a man treats you and your values with respect and is ready to compromise.
Get ready to work on your relationship
This is common advice that never fails to work. There will be no miracle, magic is forbidden outside of Hogwarts: if you do not spend time getting to know each other, do not discuss the problems that have arisen and are not ready to make concessions, then true love will not have a single chance to bloom.
And one more important nuance: you need to do it together. If you are wasting time and energy, and your partner is only watching this, then this is not a soul mate, but a freeloader who expects you to do all the work yourself.
Don't expect true love to satisfy all your needs
A soul mate is not a panacea that saves you from all life's difficulties. No one can be a best friend, a stone wall, a source of inspiration and support at the same time. The second person is only a partner with whom you will be better together than without him, but by no means a universal cure for all spiritual wounds, pain and disappointments. But there is also good news: no one has the right to demand from you to be a muse, a mistress, a mother, a housekeeper and a sidekick all rolled into one.
They don't look for a soul mate, they appoint her
And most importantly, never forget that in the end you make the choice.
Your willingness to continue matters much more than the recommendations of all astrologers and natal charts put together, and your desire to end a relationship is more significant than the predictions of even the most experienced fortune teller. Never be afraid to say no and yes: relationships will be much more valuable when you know to choose them yourself.
Like this article? Then read why at first you should meet with a man no more than once a week, what to do if you and your boyfriend have different sexual desires, and what a man should be like to become a good father.
How to find love: 7 old-fashioned tips that still work
It's time to admit that new ways of dating, which did not exist in the days of our mothers and grandmothers, inspire distrust in many people. For some, dating applications seem simply unconvincing, and someone would like to meet their love by the will of fate, and not by choosing among unfamiliar candidates based on the questionnaire data.
In addition, many are sure that couples who first met not on the Web, but in real life, are stronger. Whether this is actually the case is difficult to find out. Someone claims that there are more divorces in couples who met online than in ordinary ones. Either way, you may be interested in a few old-fashioned tips that still work and may come in handy for those who are in search of love.
Try to spend time in company
Spend more time with friends and acquaintances. This will take the pressure off your dates because your life will be filled with memorable events anyway. Practice socializing, discover your strengths, develop interests, and take up new hobbies. Do not focus only on love matters, allow yourself to see life in its entirety.
Do not look for dates
You may think that the ideal first date should be in a cafe or at the cinema, but your mothers and grandmothers can tell you about a wonderful meeting at the institute, at work, and even in the yard, which eventually turned into marriage and happy marriage.
Take a closer look at those around you and who you can learn more about from mutual acquaintances before diving into the world of blind dating with strangers.
Don't focus on external demands
In the age of social media, looks can be more deceiving than usual. Do not get hung up on ideas about how you think the ideal gentleman looks. Instead of external demands, it is better to focus on the character and interests of a man. They can significantly increase its attractiveness in your eyes.
Do not give too much importance to words
Proponents of old-fashioned ways of dating argue that paying attention to words at the very beginning of an acquaintance can be unwise. At the first meeting, strangers can experience and say something completely different from what they think. In addition, you should not be discouraged by the fact that the man you like may not know your favorite director or yesterday's news. Those who believe in romance believe that it is acquired.
It is more important to pay attention to actions.
Allow yourself intimacy when you feel like it
Psychologists recommend not to fill your head with "working" schemes that are full of sites and blogs about relationships. You don't have to wait a certain number of dates to decide on intimacy if you want it. And in the same way, you should not force yourself to get close to a person if you are not ready for this. Listen to your feelings and discard the scripts that self-proclaimed relationship experts churn out. Behind them, you run the risk of not considering the real feeling.
Don't rush to move in.
Many couples are in a hurry to combine life, but it is better to postpone this step until you are sure of your choice. Allow yourself more romance, expectations, the joy of meetings. After all, you are unlikely to wait until the moment when you wash the dishes together or take out the trash.
If you are not in love, go away
After a certain amount of time, you will have to make a serious decision.
