Dealing with emotion

Dealing With Difficult Emotions (for Teens)

en español: Cómo enfrentar las emociones difíciles

Reviewed by: D'Arcy Lyness, PhD

Positive vs. Negative Emotions

Emotions (feelings) are a normal and important part of our lives.

Some emotions are positive. Think of happiness, joy, interest, curiosity, excitement, gratitude, love, and contentment. These positive emotions feel good. Negative emotions — like sadness, anger, loneliness, jealousy, self-criticism, fear, or rejection — can be difficult, even painful at times.

That's especially true when we feel a negative emotion too often, too strongly, or we dwell on it too long.

Negative emotions are impossible to avoid, though. Everyone feels them from time to time. They may be difficult, but we can learn to handle them.

Here are three steps that can help you handle negative emotions.

Step 1: Identify the Emotion

Learning to notice and identify your feelings takes practice. In addition to focusing on your feelings, check in with your body, too. You may feel body sensations with certain emotions — perhaps your face gets hot, for example, or your muscles tense.

Be aware of how you feel. When you have a negative emotion, such as anger, try to name what you're feeling.
For example:
That guy Ian in my study group makes me so mad!
I get so jealous when I see that girl/guy with my ex.
I feel afraid whenever I have to walk past those bullies.
Don't hide how you feel from yourself. You might not want to broadcast your feelings to other people (like your ex, for example, or that guy in your study group who is making you mad). But don't suppress your feelings entirely. Simply naming the feeling is a lot better than pretending not to have it — or exploding without thinking.
Know why you feel the way you do. Figure out what happened that got you feeling the way you do.
For example:
Whenever we do group projects, Ian finds a way to take all the credit for other people's work.
Our teacher thinks Ian's the star of the team, even though he never has his own ideas.
When I see my ex flirting with other people, it reminds me that I still have feelings for him/her.
Even though the bullies don't pick on me, I see what they do to other people and it worries me.
Don't blame. Being able to recognize and explain your emotions isn't the same as blaming someone or something for the way you feel. Your ex probably isn't seeing someone new as a way to get back at you, and the guy who takes credit for your work might not even realize what he is doing. How you feel when these things happen comes from inside you. Your feelings are there for a reason — to help you make sense of what's going on.
Accept all your emotions as natural and understandable. Don't judge yourself for the emotions you feel. It's normal to feel them. Acknowledging how you feel can help you move on, so don't be hard on yourself.

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Step 2: Take Action

Once you've processed what you're feeling, you can decide if you need to express your emotion. Sometimes it's enough to just realize how you feel, but other times you'll want to do something to feel better.

Think about the best way to express your emotion. Is this a time when you need to gently confront someone else? Talk over what you're feeling with a friend? Or work off the feeling by going for a run?
For example:
It won't solve anything to show my anger to Ian — it may even make him feel more superior! But my feelings tell me that I need to avoid getting in another situation where he takes control over a project.
I'll hold my head high around my ex, then I'll put on some sad songs and have a good cry in my room to help me release my feelings and eventually let go.
My fear of being around those bullies is a sign that they have gone too far. Perhaps I should talk about what's going on with a school counselor.
Learn how to change your mood. At a certain point, you'll want to shift from a negative mood into a positive one. Otherwise your thinking may get stuck on how bad things are, and that can drag you down into feeling worse. Try doing things that make you happy, even if you don't feel like it at the time. For example, you might not be in the mood to go out after a breakup, but going for a walk or watching a funny movie with friends can lift you out of that negative space.
Build positive emotions. Positive feelings create a sense of happiness and well being. Make it a habit to notice and focus on what's good in your life — even the little things, like the praise your dad gave you for fixing his bookshelves or how great the salad you made for lunch tastes. Noticing the good things even when you're feeling bad can help you shift the emotional balance from negative to positive.
Seek support. Talk about how you're feeling with a parent, trusted adult, or a friend. They can help you explore your emotions and give you a fresh way of thinking about things. And nothing helps you feel more understood and cared for than the support of someone who loves you for who you are.
Exercise. Physical activity helps the brain produce natural chemicals that promote a positive mood. Exercise also can release stress buildup and help you from staying stuck on negative feelings.

Step 3: Get Help With Difficult Emotions

Sometimes, no matter what you do, you can't shake a tough emotion. If you find yourself stuck in feelings of sadness or worry for more than a couple of weeks, or if you feel so upset that you think you might hurt yourself or other people, you may need extra help.

Talk to a school counselor, parent, trusted adult, or therapist. Counselors and therapists are trained to teach people how to break out of negative emotions. They can provide lots of tips and ideas that will help you feel better.

Reviewed by: D'Arcy Lyness, PhD

Date reviewed: January 2017

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How to Control Your Emotions: 11 Strategies to Try

You may be able to regulate your emotions without suppressing or controlling them. This can benefit your relationships, mood, and decision-making.

The ability to experience and express emotions is more important than you might realize.

As the felt response to a given situation, emotions play a key part in your reactions. When you’re in tune with them, you have access to important knowledge that helps with:

decision-making
relationship success
day-to-day interactions
self-care

While emotions can have a helpful role in your daily life, they can take a toll on your emotional health and interpersonal relationships when they start to feel out of control.

Vicki Botnick, a therapist in Tarzana, California, explains that any emotion — even elation, joy, or others you’d typically view as positive — can intensify to a point where it becomes difficult to control.

With a little practice, though, you can take back the reigns. Two studies from 2010 suggest that having good emotional regulation skills is linked to well-being. Plus, the second one found a potential link between these skills and financial success, so putting in some work on that front may literally pay off.

Here are some pointers to get you started.

Intense emotions aren’t all bad.

“Emotions make our lives exciting, unique, and vibrant,” Botnick says. “Strong feelings can signify that we embrace life fully, that we’re not repressing our natural reactions.”

It’s perfectly normal to experience some emotional overwhelm on occasion— when something wonderful happens, when something terrible happens, when you feel like you’ve missed out.

So, how do you know when there’s a problem?

Emotions that regularly get out of hand might lead to:

relationship or friendship conflict
difficulty relating to others
trouble at work or school
an urge to use substances to help manage your emotions
physical or emotional outbursts

Find some time to take stock of just how your uncontrolled emotions are affecting your day-to-day life. This will make it easier to identify problem areas (and track your success).

You can’t control your emotions with a dial (if only it were that easy!). But imagine, for a moment, that you could manage emotions this way.

You wouldn’t want to leave them running at maximum all the time. You also wouldn’t want to switch them off entirely, either.

When you suppress or repress emotions, you’re preventing yourself from experiencing and expressing feelings. This can happen consciously (suppression) or unconsciously (repression).

Either can contribute to mental and physical health symptoms, including:

anxiety
depression
sleep issues
muscle tension and pain
difficulty managing stress
substance misuse

When learning to exercise control over emotions, make sure you aren’t just sweeping them under the rug. Healthy emotional expression involves finding some balance between overwhelming emotions and no emotions at all.

Taking a moment to check in with yourself about your mood can help you begin gaining back control.

Say you’ve been seeing someone for a few months. You tried planning a date last week, but they said they didn’t have time. Yesterday, you texted again, saying, “I’d like to see you soon. Can you meet this week?”

They finally reply, more than a day later: “Can’t. Busy.”

You’re suddenly extremely upset. Without stopping to think, you hurl your phone across the room, knock over your wastebasket, and kick your desk, stubbing your toe.

Interrupt yourself by asking:

What am I feeling right now? (disappointed, confused, furious)
What happened to make me feel this way? (They brushed me off with no explanation.)
Does the situation have a different explanation that might make sense? (Maybe they’re stressed, sick, or dealing with something else they don’t feel comfortable explaining. They might plan to explain more when they can.)

What do I want to do about these feelings? (Scream, vent my frustration by throwing things, text back something rude. )
Is there a better way of coping with them? (Ask if everything’s OK. Ask when they’re free next. Go for a walk or run.)

By considering possible alternatives, you’re reframing your thoughts, which can help you modify your first extreme reaction.

It can take some time before this response becomes a habit. With practice, going through these steps in your head will become easier (and more effective).

If you’re trying to get better at managing emotions, you might try downplaying your feelings to yourself.

When you hyperventilate after receiving good news or collapse on the floor screaming and sobbing when you can’t find your keys, it might seem helpful to tell yourself, “Just calm down,” or “It’s not that big of a deal, so don’t freak out.”

But this invalidates your experience. It is a big deal to you.

Accepting emotions as they come helps you get more comfortable with them. Increasing your comfort around intense emotions allows you to fully feel them without reacting in extreme, unhelpful ways.

To practice accepting emotions, try thinking of them as messengers. They’re not “good” or “bad.” They’re neutral. Maybe they bring up unpleasant feelings sometimes, but they’re still giving you important information that you can use.

For example, try:

“I’m upset because I keep losing my keys, which makes me late. I should put a dish on the shelf by the door so I remember to leave them in the same place.”

Accepting emotions may lead to greater life satisfaction and fewer mental health symptoms. What’s more, people thinking of their emotions as helpful may lead to higher levels of happiness.

Writing down (or typing up) your feelings and the responses they trigger can help you uncover any disruptive patterns.

Sometimes, it’s enough to mentally trace emotions back through your thoughts. Putting feelings onto paper can allow you to reflect on them more deeply.

It also helps you recognize when specific circumstances, like trouble at work or family conflict, contribute to harder-to-control emotions. Identifying specific triggers makes it possible to come up with ways to manage them more productively.

Journaling provides the most benefit when you do it daily. Keep your journal with you and jot down intense emotions or feelings as they happen. Try to note the triggers and your reaction. If your reaction didn’t help, use your journal to explore more helpful possibilities for the future.

There’s much to be said for the power of a deep breath, whether you’re ridiculously happy or so angry you can’t speak.

Slowing down and paying attention to your breath won’t make the emotions go away (and remember, that’s not the goal).

Still, deep breathing exercises can help you ground yourself and take a step back from the first intense flash of emotion and any extreme reaction you want to avoid.

The next time you feel emotions starting to take control:

Breathe in slowly. Deep breaths come from the diaphragm, not the chest. It may help to visualize your breath rising from deep in your belly.
Hold it. Hold your breath for a count of three, then let it out slowly.
Consider a mantra. Some people find it helpful to repeat a mantra, like “I am calm” or “I am relaxed.”

There’s a time and place for everything, including intense emotions. Sobbing uncontrollably is a pretty common response to losing a loved one, for example. Screaming into your pillow, even punching it, might help you relieve some anger and tension after being dumped.

Other situations, however, call for some restraint. No matter how frustrated you are, screaming at your boss over an unfair disciplinary action won’t help.

Being mindful of your surroundings and the situation can help you learn when it’s OK to let feelings out and when you might want to sit with them for the moment.

Getting some distance from intense feelings can help you make sure you’re reacting to them in reasonable ways, according to Botnick.

This distance might be physical, like leaving an upsetting situation, for example. But you can also create some mental distance by distracting yourself.

While you don’t want to block or avoid feelings entirely, it’s not harmful to distract yourself until you’re in a better place to deal with them. Just make sure you do come back to them. Healthy distractions are only temporary.

Try:

taking a walk
watching a funny video
talking to a loved one
spending a few minutes with your pet

If you practice meditation already, it might be one of your go-to methods for coping with extreme feelings.

Meditation can help you increase your awareness of all feelings and experiences. When you meditate, you’re teaching yourself to sit with those feelings, to notice them without judging yourself or attempting to change them or make them go away.

As mentioned above, learning to accept all of your emotions can make emotional regulation easier. Meditation helps you increase those acceptance skills. It also offers other benefits, like helping you relax and get better sleep.

Our guide to different kinds of meditation can help you get started.

When you’re under a lot of stress, managing your emotions can become more difficult. Even people who generally can control their emotions well might find it harder in times of high tension and stress.

Reducing stress, or finding more helpful ways to manage it, can help your emotions become more manageable.

Mindfulness practices like meditation can help with stress, too. They won’t get rid of it, but they can make it easier to live with.

Other healthy ways to cope with stress include:

getting enough sleep
making time to talk (and laugh) with friends
exercise
spending time in nature
making time for relaxation and hobbies

If your emotions continue to feel overwhelming, it may be time to seek professional support.

Long-term or persistent emotional dysregulation and mood swings are linked to certain mental health conditions, including borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder. Trouble controlling emotions can also relate to trauma, family issues, or other underlying concerns, Botnick explains.

A therapist can offer compassionate, judgment-free support as you:

explore factors contributing to dysregulated emotions
address severe mood swings
learn how down-regulate intense feelings or up-regulate limited emotional expression
practice challenging and reframing feelings that cause distress

Mood swings and intense emotions can provoke negative or unwanted thoughts that eventually trigger feelings of hopelessness or despair.

This cycle can eventually lead to unhelpful coping methods like self-harm or even thoughts of suicide. If you begin thinking about suicide or have urges to self-harm, talk to a trusted loved one who can help you get support right away.

If you need help now

If you’re considering suicide or have thoughts of harming yourself, you can call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at 800-662-HELP (4357).

The 24/7 hotline will connect you with mental health resources in your area. Trained specialists can also help you find your state’s resources for treatment if you don’t have health insurance.

Was this helpful?

Crystal Raypole has previously worked as a writer and editor for GoodTherapy. Her fields of interest include Asian languages and literature, Japanese translation, cooking, natural sciences, sex positivity, and mental health. In particular, she’s committed to helping decrease stigma around mental health issues.

Working with emotions - Psychologos

Gentle and gentle feminine approach.

The masculine approach is as simple as that of a surgeon

Working with emotions is one of the ways of dealing with emotions, which is predominantly characteristic of the gentle and careful feminine approach in psychotherapy. In this approach, it is believed that it is unproductive to deal with unwanted emotions, the thesis “There are no bad emotions” is often broadcast and it is proposed to accept any emotion in the first place, as a living being that cares about the client. Instead of a forceful approach to unwanted emotions, it is proposed here to demonstrate a friendly and respectful approach to them, counting on reciprocity. Working with emotions suggests that any emotion is always something serious and significant, which cannot be simply brushed aside and ignored; this is something that needs to be done seriously and most likely for a long time, since it is impossible to remove an emotion, and it is not easy to establish relations with it.

An employee can be fired, but children have to be brought up. This is, of course, a more difficult task.

Is it always necessary to treat unwanted emotions in this way? Of course not. For example, a serious respectful attitude to the fears of the child is not always justified. Sometimes a frightened child is best helped by a cheerful look and a cheerful voice of an adult: "What are you afraid of such nonsense? Let's go, I'll show you, it's not scary at all!" Excessive attention to emotions strengthens them, and sometimes the less attention to an unwanted emotion, the faster it passes.

Don't feed your fears with attention and they will go away.

If an unwanted and inappropriate emotion can be simply removed, it must be removed, and not bothered with respect for it and long conversations with it, as is often done in deep psychotherapeutic work. Those mentally healthy and strong people who are closer to a masculine approach are more likely to choose to deal with an unwanted emotion, rather than work with it.

If undesirable emotions (anguish, resentment, fear, guilt) are seen as occupiers, then the most natural and simple solution is to drive them out of their native land. Remove melancholy, remove resentment, overcome fear, throw unnecessary guilt out of your head ...

However, if direct methods of removing emotions do not help and an exhausting war with emotions begins, it is very useful to consider the issue of declaring a truce instead of war and starting to work, talk, and look for opportunities to make friends with emotions, even sick and harmful. Sometimes, especially in the short term, this brings good results. In the long term, it seems more justified not to be afraid of unwanted emotions, to treat any emotions calmly and with understanding, but if necessary, to have the resources to quickly restore order in the soul, including by force. In any case, it is more useful to learn how to live in such a way as to prevent the appearance of unwanted emotions, and set tasks more positively: not to remove unwanted emotions, but to form the necessary emotional state for yourself. Not to remove the feeling of guilt, but to put things in order in the head so that a person thinks not about guilt, but about business. Not to remove fears, but to strengthen the will and cultivate courage.

Working with emotions. — Human psychology

Working with emotions is one of the ways of dealing with emotions, which is mainly characterized by a gentle and careful approach. In this approach, it is considered that it is unproductive to deal with unwanted emotions and it is proposed to accept any emotion in the first place, as a living being that cares about the client. Instead of a forceful approach to unwanted emotions, it is proposed here to demonstrate a friendly and respectful approach to them, counting on reciprocity. Working with emotions suggests that any emotion is always something serious and significant, which cannot be simply brushed aside and ignored; this is something that needs to be done seriously and most likely for a long time, since it is impossible to remove an emotion, and it is not so easy to establish relations with it. Managing your emotions is certainly a difficult task. But solvable.

Is it always necessary to treat unwanted emotions in this way? Of course not. For example, a serious respectful attitude to the fears of the child is not always justified. Sometimes a frightened child is best helped by a cheerful look and a cheerful voice of an adult: “What are you afraid of such nonsense? Come on, I'll show you, it's not scary at all! Excessive attention to emotions strengthens them, and sometimes the less attention to an unwanted emotion, the faster it passes.

Do not feed your fears with attention, and they will leave you.

If an unwanted and inappropriate emotion can be simply removed, it should be removed, and not bothered with respect for it and long conversations with it, as is often done in deep psychotherapeutic work. Those mentally healthy and strong people who are closer to a masculine approach are more likely to choose to deal with an unwanted emotion, rather than work with it.

If undesirable emotions (anguish, resentment, fear, feelings of guilt) are seen as invaders, then the most natural and simple solution is to drive them out of their native land. Remove longing, remove resentment, overcome fear, get rid of unnecessary guilt from your head ...

However, if direct methods of removing emotions do not help and an exhausting war with emotions begins, it is very useful to consider the issue of declaring a truce instead of war and starting to work, talk, and look for opportunities to make friends with emotions, even sick and harmful. Sometimes, especially in the short term, this brings good results. In the long term, it seems more justified not to be afraid of unwanted emotions, to treat any emotions calmly and with understanding, but if necessary, to have the resources to quickly restore order in the soul, including by force. In any case, it is more useful to learn how to live in such a way as to prevent the appearance of unwanted emotions, and set tasks more positively: not to remove unwanted emotions, but to form the necessary emotional state for yourself. Not to remove the feeling of guilt, but to put things in order in the head so that a person thinks not about guilt, but about business and how to overcome obstacles. Not to remove fears, but to strengthen the will and cultivate courage.

"Emotions are expressive movements of the face and voice, accompanied by emotional experiences against the background of a change in the functional state of the body." In fact, everything is more complicated, because, no matter what science insists on, people use words not strictly, not according to science, but at their own discretion, and therefore the word “emotions” in life has several – and quite different – basic meanings.

In the first sense, emotions are fast and short elements of feelings, their situational manifestation.

Anger, accusations and suffering, like flashing emotions with a deep feeling of resentment.

In the second sense, emotions are feelings expressed for presentation to others.

Experiences for oneself are rather feelings. A splash of feelings on another, a demonstration of feelings, expressive movements for ... - these are rather emotions.

In the third sense, emotions are the name of all manifestations of the affective sphere, in this case, emotions are understood as feelings, and affects, and moods, and even desires.

At least emotions and feelings are easily used as synonyms.

Where did the word emotion come from? In Latin "emoveo" means - shake, wave, in French "emotion" is translated as "excitement, excitement."

When there is peace in the soul and body, one does not talk about emotions. Emotion is always movement: dynamics, transition, bubbling. This or that state, if it is not accompanied by expressive movements of the face - is not yet an emotion, but a quick transition between states, movement and switching between states - can already be called an emotion. Emotions are movements, but not all, but necessarily expressive, conveying one or another attitude, carrying information about the state of a person.

The American psychologist Carroll Izard insists that only one facial expression is associated with one emotion, which cannot be confused with another. This is not entirely true, childish resentment has a dozen different recognizable mimic forms, but the main thing here is different - that the movement of the face into one or another muzzle is not accidental, but expresses a certain meaning.

Emotions can be observed from the outside, emotions can be experienced from the inside. People talk about a person's emotions by observing only the expressive movements of his face - joy or doubt, boredom or interest. It is clear that in fact there may not be real emotion in this case: emotion can only be shown. An attentive researcher knows that a real living emotion is supplemented by the state of the body, more precisely, by movements, by rapid switching between functional states.

I tensed up, relaxed, collected myself - relaxed again and turned into absent-mindedness. He went into anger, fear arose, relaxed into a smile...

Changes in physiological parameters: EEG, GSR - an important sign that emotion is really present. Actually, a lie detector is built on this.

But for many people the most important sign of emotions is inner movements, movements of experiences. Experiences, like the heart of emotions, are internal movements of certain charged events: a thrill of expectation, a flash of joy, tormented by doubts, an impulse of rage, a scrolling of loss.

Pay attention: internal events are not dead, but alive, charged with interactions with each other and influencing other internal processes in a person.

Total

Emotions are a package of three elements: these are expressive movements of the face and voice, these are rapid shifts in the body from one functional state to another, and these are movements of emotional experiences. In a complete, real emotion with a face, body and experiences, these three components are expressed all at once and fully, but more often - not all and partially. In any case, emotions are always movements that have an expressive image.

The difference between emotions and feelings, moods, expressive movements and other similar concepts, see →

How to treat emotions? To simplify a lot, we can say that women have too many emotions, and men have too few, they are underdeveloped. More precisely, see what is left and right emotionality.

Classification of emotions, types of emotions and feelings

Emotions differ in their source (who triggers our emotions: we ourselves or those with whom we communicate? or the situation?), in their sign (positive and negative), in the height of the emotional tone and, if possible, manage emotions ... See →

Emotions in human life

Emotions appeared for some reason in the evolutionary development of man. For what? Emotions are mastered, learned by each child in the process of his development.

Restraint in behavior, the ability to restrain one's negative feelings is an indicator of internal culture and upbringing, an obligatory attribute of a business and simply successful person.

The notion that holding back one's negative emotions is wrong and harmful is supported predominantly within Gestalt therapy, but scientific research suggests otherwise. If you do not wind up emotions inside yourself, then restraint in behavior and expression of your feelings is not at all harmful - neither for physical nor for mental health.

Japanese culture was originally built on the containment of socially unacceptable emotions and feelings, but among the Japanese the lowest percentage of deaths from vascular and heart disease (28%, in Europe - 30%). The Japanese are quite emotional, they quite allow themselves to experience emotions, but never show them where they should be. In social situations, the Japanese are very reserved, but this does not harm their health. There are two reasons for this: the Japanese do not hype their feelings, do not inflame them - and at the same time they are convinced of the benefits of restraining feelings. This radically distinguishes them from the Europeans, who, holding back their feelings, are already convinced in advance that this is unhealthy.↑.

Talk about the dangers of holding back negative emotions has no evidence base. Psychologist Carol Tavris, who explored anger in her monograph, argues that venting our anger - something that many other psychologists call for - usually only worsens the situation. She writes: “It seems to me that the main effect of the theory of blowing off steam is to increase the level of noise in our lives, and not to reduce problems. I noticed that people who are especially prone to expressing anger do not become calmer from this, but on the contrary, even more angry and angry. In her rather thorough review of the literature, Dr. Carol Tavris states that pent-up anger “does not lead in any predictable or consistent way to depression, stomach ulcers, or high blood pressure, or cause seizures or heart attacks… what are the medical consequences if we feel in control of the situation that causes anger, if we interpret anger as a manifestation of resentment that needs to be corrected, and not as an emotion that needs to be locked in, if we feel commitment towards work and people in our life ".

According to the research of B. Bushman, professor at the University of Iowa, taking out anger on an inanimate object does not lead to stress mitigation, but quite the opposite. Psychologist J. Bonanno from Columbia University showed that people who practice control over emotions in life, who know how to restrain them if necessary, are less prone to life stresses than others↑.

To stop your fits of anger, you need to change your character, become calm and restrained. Sometimes it seems unrealistic, unbelievable, impossible, but it is not. Character is a collection of habits, and habits can be changed. If you set yourself such a task and start training calm reactions, you can do it.

Please note: Sean Carroll's behavior was videotaped and was actually very helpful. He knew that the experiment with him was being filmed by television people, his wife regularly asked about his success, he copied the data from the video to his flash drive every evening ... The situation was built in such a way that Sean did not forget about his intention, and that was what helped him. He did not forget - he did - he succeeded. What will you do so that you do not forget your intention to react in a more restrained, calmer way?

When it is harmful to keep emotions inside

Restraint and the ability to control one's emotions are wonderful qualities, but this should not be confused with the suppression of emotions. Suppression is carried out in relation to strong, violent, rebellious emotions, these are attempts to contain the volcano, leading to even larger explosions.

Suppression of emotions already promoted is a rather harmful thing. Emotion suppression is an attempt to contain the volcano, leading to more explosions.

Suppressed but active emotions linger in the chest, throat and peritoneum (diaphragm). As a rule, this generates new negative emotions (other options are possible). When one emotion naturally and automatically generates another, we can say that one emotion "mutates" into another.

At the same time, the concept of "mutation of emotions" should be used carefully: when the transformation of one emotion into another does not occur as an automatic process, but is performed by a person creatively, the concept of "mutation" is hardly adequate.

There is evidence that the suppression of anger, irritation and resentment leads to fatigue and negatively affects health.

A typical mechanism: first, a person spins the negative in himself, after which he does not give it an outlet, continuing to spin the negative inside. Anger or resentment (for example) lingers in the chest, in the throat, the resulting tension is transferred to the diaphragm, the blood is squeezed out of the stomach, the stomach bleeds, the walls of the stomach lose their protection from gastric juice. The stomach begins to digest itself - an ulcer.

At the same time, it is important not to confuse the suppression of already hyped emotions and elementary restraint, the restraint of a well-mannered person. If you do not wind up emotions inside yourself, then restraint in behavior and expression of your feelings is not at all harmful. See →

Summary

If you are generally calm and in control of your emotions against this background, this is normal restraint, it is harmless.

Learn more