Best denomination for introverts
10 Church Things That Alienate Introverts
It was my first time in this particular setting. I sat through the worship and teaching times, quietly getting a sense of the group and how things worked.
I was enjoying myself well–until the sharing time began. Each person in the room began to share personal struggles. As I watched it became obvious that everyone was expected to participate. Now I love the idea of honest vulnerability, but as the leader prodded me not once, but twice, to share something personal with people I’d never met, I became uncomfortably aware that this didn’t feel like a very safe place.
If you’re an introvert like me, you understand my hesitance. Many social and church situations are designed with extroverts in mind—situations that can leave the other 50% of society feeling uncomfortable. Here are 10 church things that can alienate introverts.
1. Prolonged Welcome Time
Number one on the list of scare-away-the-introverts is a long hand-shaking time during the church service. Most introverts don’t mind shaking hands for a little while. But introverts don’t usually enjoy a lot of small talk. And after greeting people nearby, long welcome times leave the introvert standing awkwardly, feeling like an outcast, or putting on a fake face and shaking hands anyway.
None of these solutions are happy ones. Be aware that prolonged welcome time will probably send most introverts running for the hills (or at least the coffee bar or bathroom).
2. Overly Enthusiastic Greeters
Happily, most churches understand the importance of greeters. After all the main church doors are an ideal place to welcome new and returning people! But a boisterous greeter can scare off incoming introverts, especially if the greeter is too enthusiastic, especially loud, or peppers people with questions.
Introverts like conversations with people they know and trust. And too much enthusiasm (or a barrage of questions) while the introvert’s trying to navigate inside and find a seat just makes him uncomfortable.
3. Expectations (or Pressure) to Serve
Introverts truly love other people. And introverts especially love serving people within their own skill set, according to their time frame, and in a way that honors who the introvert is.
A church with a myriad of programs and ministries can overwhelm introverts, especially if those opportunities include pressure and expectations to serve a certain way. Introverts like to be approached about an opportunity and given time to think through and process what they desire to do. When they’re given appropriate time and space to process what they need, introverts can become some of the most loyal volunteers a church can have.
4. Misjudged Silence
Think back to a recent life group or Bible study meeting. There were probably a few talkers and some definite listeners in the room. Chances are the listeners were introverts.
In a group setting introverts often sit quietly before jumping into the conversation. It doesn’t mean they’re upset, shy, snobby, or daydreaming. And it definitely doesn’t mean there’s nothing deep going on inside. (On the contrary introverts have hundreds of deep thoughts!) Most introverts prefer to take their time to fully understand an atmosphere, situation, or group dynamic before contributing.
5. Asking Guests to Stand and Introduce Themselves
Another guaranteed way to make introverts want to crawl under the nearest pew is to ask them to stand up in front of an entire church and introduce themselves out loud. It’s not that all introverts are shy, reclusive, or have irrational fears around public speaking. It’s just that most don’t enjoy being surprised with having to speak to a large group they don’t know.
Churches can help their introverted visitors by giving them opportunities to seek out church information one-on-one in the lobby. Or by having a few select, trained members welcome visitors privately.
6. Being Singled Out
We’ve probably all been there. The leader in front of the room is passionate about his latest ministry project, and he needs volunteers. So he looks around, picks a face he knows, and asks that person to commit on the spot.
This whole scenario makes introverts cringe. Really most people hate being put on the spot, but introverts especially – whether it’s to share something, to volunteer, to stand up, to give an update, to do, well . . . anything unexpected. Better to wait for the enthusiastic volunteer than to single anyone out (especially an introvert).
7. Sharing Personal Things with Strangers
Like my experience with the church group pressuring people to share struggles, it can be tricky for introverts to open up to strangers. In a church setting when there’s a chance to offer prayer requests or discuss personal issues, most introverts won’t be the first (or second or third) to volunteer. When thrust into a you-should-share situation, many introverts will opt out. And that’s okay.
Forcing people to reveal personal things is seldom the best way to cultivate a grace-filled environment anyway. And introvert or not, people appreciate being welcomed into a safe sharing space and invited to participate when they’re comfortable and ready.
8. Uncomfortable Prayer Time
Have you ever noticed what an intimate thing prayer is? Prayer is basically having a chat with omnipotent God and is often quite personal, when we stop and think about it.
Not everyone is comfortable praying while others listen, and introverts can fall into this category. Being asked to lead corporate prayer can be nerve-racking for them. And popcorn prayer (pray-as-you feel-led-but-everyone’s-actually-expected-to-participate) is also hard for introverts because it feels like pressure.
Just because someone prefers to pray silently doesn’t mean they’re not close to God or that there’s something wrong. God created various personality types, and leaving room in church situations for different preferences and communication styles is healthy.
9. Prolonged Physical Contact
Whether it’s holding hands with the strangers across the aisle to create that unbreakable chain, bombastic hugs from enthusiastic greeters, or extended hand shaking, prolonged physical contact can make introverts cranky.
There’s just something about being that close to acquaintances (or complete strangers) that makes the introverts among us dash for the nearest exit. Making personal contact optional in large church settings will help your introverts feel more at home.
10. Activities Tailored for Extroverts
Church activities are typically geared for medium to large groups: Bible studies, retreats, conferences, social gatherings. And with an increase in crowd size comes an increase in the energy it takes for an introvert to stay tuned in and comfortable.
Introverts typically enjoy socializing and talking with a few people at a time, so if an event has too many people, requires too much extroverting, or even just lasts too long, introverts will probably look for the nearest escape route.
As believers it’s important to remember we’re all part of the same body but with different gifts and functions. If we commit to being “kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another” (Romans 12:10 KJV), we’ll realize that loving our brothers and sisters in Christ means accepting and appreciating them for who they are—introvert, extrovert, and all.
Janna Wright told her first story—something about kittens and lost mittens—at age two. As an author and speaker she still loves sharing stories, especially through her “biz-nistry,” Grace Thread, and her recent book, Grace Changes Everything. Janna adores deep talks, the Colorado mountain air outside her back door, and most of all, helping women of faith thrive in their God-given adventure stories.
Image courtesy: ©Thinkstock/Hramovnick
Publication date: August 23, 2017
Introverts in the Church | Christian Bible Studies
The first three-quarters of the sanctuary were occupied by people who had attended the church for years, stretching back to their days in Sunday school. Over the years the church settings had changed—from classroom to youth group room to traditional worship service to contemporary worship service and now the Sunday night postmodern worship gathering—but the seating arrangement had remained the same. They sat in their well- established groups of friends, as comfortable as they were in their own homes with their own families. In the last quarter of the room were a few rows of solitary stragglers, spaced out by an empty seat or two in between. These people were visitors or, in some cases, regulars who had not been attending since birth. They were drawn to worshiping God in a postmodern language that they understood, but they were wary of the rigid social boundaries.
At the time of Communion, the pastor said there would be an experimental new format for taking the sacrament. He explained that the Lord's Supper is not an individual act but a corporate meal in which we celebrate together the meaning of Jesus' death. Therefore, instead of coming up to the front one at a time to partake of the elements, people would come up in groups and celebrate Communion together. He instructed them to choose their own groups, from the people situated around them, and to assemble at the table when they were formed.
My friend Sarah, an introvert who attends frequently, sat in the second-to-last row. After hearing these directions, she stood up, in extreme social discomfort, and walked out of the sanctuary. Sarah is an ordained Presbyterian minister.
Excluding Introverts from Worship
A 2006 article by Mandy Smith in Christian Standard presented this chilling scenario:
Imagine hearing the following at the opening of your next church service:
Welcome! We're going to worship the Lord in spirit and in truth today. So let's strip off all encumbrances by removing our shoes, socks, and accessories. Now, grab someone new and give them a hug. Go on, don't be shy. In fact, the Bible tells us to greet one another with a holy kiss! Now, empty out the contents of your pockets and purses and form small groups to examine them together. Open up to those around you. Tell them your fears and weaknesses so you can feel the love of your Christian family.
And all the introverts cringed together.
Though the author obviously writes with hyperbole, her point is well grounded: the culture and practices of evangelical worship services can be painfully unpleasant for some people, even those who are wholeheartedly devoted to Christ and his mission. The familiarity and informality of some churches in the evangelical tradition, with their best intentions of devotion and hospitality, can actually exclude introverts. Times of greeting and sharing in a public context, especially with strangers or distant acquaintances, are unnatural and sometimes painfully uncomfortable. In fact, some introverts I interviewed conceded that they commonly show up late on Sundays to avoid the awkward pre-service socializing and greeting times.
Researching Worship Styles
As part of my research, I attended several churches of varying denominations, sizes, and worship styles—though most of them identified with the evangelical tradition. I visited a colossal megachurch with a professional and polished service, an alliterative three-point sermon, and an eye for seekers. I attended a small Quaker church, with a wall of windows behind the pulpit, which looked out on the San Gabriel Mountains. I visited a traditional and echoing Episcopalian church, an evensong, a meditative Taize service, many contemporary services at carpeted Presbyterian churches, and three postmodern worship gatherings bursting at the seams with young people.
My most disappointing worship experience took place at a large church that has quadrupled in six years, their numbers swelled by college students and 20-somethings. At 30, I was anticipating a service that communicated the gospel in a familiar language. We lined up at the door before the service started as if waiting for a bouncer to check our names off the list and open the velvet ropes. After getting cleared to enter, I sat down on my folding chair, where I was inundated with blaring music, flashing colored lights, floating images, and rolling PowerPoint announcements on numerous screens around the room, and the loud chatter of young adults laughing and flirting. Clearly this was not a time for silent prayer. At the start of the service, the scream of the electric guitar caused everyone to leap out of his or her chair. For the next 30 minutes people clapped and danced and cheered their way through a frenetic worship set.
After an extended announcement time, the pastor preached a long message on sacrificial love. Fifty-five minutes of preaching later, I was already exhausted, and the service was only half over. After the sermon, however, I experienced a glimmer of hope. The lights dimmed, the screen went black, the guitar switched from electric to acoustic, and people bowed their heads. We would have a chance to sit with the Lord, praying, listening, and resting in his presence. The worship leader explained what this time was for and gave some instructions for how to pray. After that he provided some suggestions for what to pray for. He repeated the refrain that started with "Maybe you're feeling": Maybe you're feeling hopeless. Maybe you're feeling like God could never forgive you. Maybe you're feeling uncertain about what God wants for your life. Then he proceeded to quote some biblical passages that address those feelings, God's words to those who are struggling. He went on to preach a mini-sermon that reassured us that, in Christ, our sins are forgiven, and after a two-second pause, the electric guitar sprung to life. We were up on our feet again celebrating. The entire two-and-a-half hours of worship was filled with a steady, pounding stream of words. And though there wasn't a false word uttered during the service, I left feeling empty and disoriented. Never have I needed a nap so badly after church.
Providing a Quiet Place
A paradox I uncovered in my research is that introverts often feel more freedom in worship services that feature traditional liturgy than they do in ones that feature more open, informal, unstructured styles of worship. Introverts often appreciate the depth of liturgical prayers and hymns, as well as the rich symbolism that fill traditional churches. They may feel less expectation from worship leaders in these churches to offer outward, emotional responses. One friend who attends a traditional church said that the liturgy "guides me into God's presence" and requires less energy on his part than the nondenominational church he used to attend.
Some introverts decry the shallowness of contemporary worship songs and their repetitive refrains, which can feel emotionally manipulative. They say that loud music disrupts their internal dialogue with the Spirit. One member of a charismatic church lamented that when people showed emotion in worship, the pastor would proclaim "The Spirit is really moving this morning!" These kinds of churches tend to encourage spontaneous bodily responses—raising arms, kneeling, dancing—and many introverts are uncomfortable with these kinds of reactions and the attention they draw. And the more the expectation for this kind of worship grows, the more introverts consider it artificial and stifling.
I do not wish to reinforce introverted stereotypes that we are melancholics who are unable to have fun or celebrate, who spend our hours in self-important isolation and would prefer to live in a soundproof room lined by black walls. I consider myself an animated and socially confident introvert, who enjoys concerts and sporting events, and even crowds in the right situations. The point is that when introverts enter into worship, we are apt to come trembling before a God whose mysterious otherness often reduces us to silent awe. For us, quiet is often the context for heartfelt worship. For centuries a "sanctuary" was not only a holy place for worship but also a safe harbor for refugees. When introverts go to church, we crave sanctuary in every sense of the word, as we flee from the disorienting distractions of 21st-century life. We desire to escape from superficial relationships, trivial communications, and the constant noise that pervade our world, and find rest in the probing depths of God's love. We want to hear God's voice, which comes to us more often in whispers than in triumphant shouts.
The movement in the church toward postmodern expressions of worship, in my view, is an advantageous shift for introverts. Churches are moving away from worship environments that resemble the locales of our daily lives and are returning to the idea of a sanctuary as a holy place. Evangelicals are embracing ancient forms of liturgy and ritual, which include meditative prayer, silence, and imaginative and nonverbal worship expressions. We are rediscovering the power of symbols, which have the ability to eclipse the impact of all the words uttered in a service. The cross, once marginalized by seeker services, has now returned to its place of prominence. Protestant churches, suspicious of icons since the Reformation, are bringing art and images into their sanctuaries, recognizing their ability to foster an atmosphere of prayerfulness and sacredness. We are learning to incorporate all human senses into our worship of God—not just the sense of hearing.
When I was a college pastor, we tried a number of different worship experiences that resonated with the introverted students. In a Good Friday service, we created prayer stations centering on different aspects of the meaning of Jesus' death: In one corner we placed a wooden cross and kneeling pillows. In another, we set a bowl of water so that the students could wash their hands as a symbol of God's cleansing effect through Jesus' death. At the front of the room, the students could write their sins on a piece of paper and nail them to another wooden cross. A fourth station featured Scripture passages for reflection, illuminated by candles. Another had pictures of people in impoverished parts of the world so that we could prayerfully embrace our role in alleviating the suffering of others. For the 30 minutes that the students moved through the stations, the only sound in the room was the haunting echo of hammers pounding sins to the cross.
My point here is not that churches should coddle introverts. I do not intend to create yet another target audience for a church culture that is already marinating in consumerism. We should not cater our worship services to introverts anymore than we should to extroverts. There are times when introverts should feel uncomfortable in worship, though we should be cautious as to the degree of discomfort. But if we are always comfortable, our faith goes stagnant.
Introverts need to be challenged to experience God in ways that stretch us, and we need to be in situations that help us grow in love for others. Introverts may need to keep struggling through greeting times in church, because we need the constant reminder that the Christian life is never lived in isolation. Because introverts understand what it's like to be on the outside of a community looking in, we can relate to people who are visiting our church and extend hospitality to them in non-intimidating ways.
However, my hope is that churches will begin to recognize when their worship services are communicating to introverts that their ways of living and relating and worshiping are inferior or unfaithful. Just as there is not one shape of discipleship, there is not one mold of worship. I would like for my fellow pastors to understand that hour-long sermons may overwhelm a sizable demographic of their congregations, and a two-second silence for personal confession may feel like a mere hand wave at people who want to interact with God in a quiet way. In fact, as we find more balance in our worship, it will not only be introverts who benefit. Extroverts too will learn to listen for God in the cracks of their speech and grow in understanding that "in quietness and in trust shall be your strength" (Is. 30:15).
Adapted from Introverts in the Church by Adam S. McHugh (IVP). Used by permission of InterVarsity Press PO Box 1400 Downers Grove, IL 60515. www.ivpress.com.
Copyright © 2013 by Christianity Today/ChristianBibleStudies.com. Click here for reprint information.
Networking for introverts - a guide for the shy - Alina Tsvetkova on vc.ru
Hello!
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In touch Alina is a communications expert at MyQRcards. And yes, I'm also a hell of a shy marketer, but despite this, my job is to find the best solutions to one problem: how to make contact on the first meeting. In the publication, I have collected 9 tips that will help you do it as successfully as possible.
I know that even people who love attention find it difficult to make connections. But if you're a shy person, your palms sweat when you need to talk to someone, and the word "self-presentation" makes your breath quicken, then this article is for you.
Yes, networking can be a real nightmare for an introvert. But this is not at all necessary! If your profession involves constant communication with new people, you should remember that the process of networking is a skill that you can learn, no matter how you are arranged. Consistent practice can produce incredible results in the long run.
I will tell you what you need to do to succeed in this field.
Tip #0: Go Out of the Box
As an expert, I know that the hardest thing is to take the first step. Surprise and be remembered. This works flawlessly. For example, demonstrate the contactless transfer of an electronic business card: hold the NFC card to the interlocutor's phone, in a second, when your business card opens in the browser, and the mouth of the interlocutor is on the face, you can introduce yourself. You will definitely be remembered.
This is how you present yourself at the same time (such a simple action as presenting a business card can tell a lot about a person) and capture attention.
Branded NFC card with electronic business card
Tip #1: Use your weaknesses as strengths
One of the best qualities of an introvert is the ability to listen. This is a fantastic skill that will come in handy in any conversation, especially when meeting new people. When starting a conversation, listen carefully to what the other person is saying. He will certainly feel that you respect and appreciate him. In addition, you may hear something really important that may be useful to you in the future.
Another strength of introverts is thoughtfulness and introspection. This allows them to study the problem from different angles, take into account different points of view. Introverts are excellent mediators and peacemakers. If disagreements arise between colleagues, introverts will always help resolve the situation.
Tip #2: Make the Most of Every Conversation
Small talk is often viewed as a kind of "necessary evil" that can be overcome to establish trust. Introverts are great at using this chatter to their advantage. Introverts are good listeners. They readily ask questions to the interlocutors and thus keep the conversation going. Use small talk to improve your social skills and boost your self-confidence.
Of course, introverts need time to "recharge" after a long time with people. Therefore, if you feel overwhelmed and overwhelmed during the conversation, take a break, give yourself a little rest. You can continue the conversation a little later, being ready for a productive dialogue.
Tip #3: Make a Good First Impression
In networking, making a great first impression is especially important. But introverts in this regard often feel constrained in comparison with other people. After all, you won't get a second chance to make a first impression, so it's important to be confident in what you're doing.
Something to help you make a great impression.
- First, you need to look good. So wear clothes that make you feel confident and comfortable. But do not forget that it must correspond to the moment.
- Second, practice self-presentation. Come up with a short 30-second introduction about who you are and what you do. This is a great way to introduce yourself to a new person.
- Finally, smile! A sincere smile is disarming. This is one of the best ways to make a great first impression.
Tip #4: Keep in touch
Once you have established contact, try to keep in touch. It's pretty simple. Send a message to messenger or TenChat. A couple of offers are enough - and you are always in touch. Subscribe to new acquaintances on social networks or invite them to lunch or a cup of coffee. By the way, if you're an introvert, meeting over lunch is a great way to get to know someone without feeling uncomfortable. Awkward pauses can always be filled with chewing.
Keeping in touch is very important if we are talking about networking. So even a casual acquaintance you turn into a long-term partnership. Do not be afraid to communicate with people and always stay in touch. One of the best ways to manage contacts and keep in touch is to use MyQRcards. MyQRcards makes it easy to share contacts and connect with each other quickly.
Tip #5: Go where it's scary
The surest way to develop in networking is to practice. The more often you do this, the more comfortable you feel. Therefore, do not be afraid to step over yourself a little and meet new people. Try to make the most of every opportunity to communicate (the line at the checkout at the supermarket is also an opportunity) and soon you will become a real networking professional - better than any extrovert.
Tip #6: Don't get distracted
It is important to be involved in a conversation. This can be difficult for introverts, they are quite thoughtful and tend to go into their thoughts with their heads. But if you want to make a good impression, you need to focus on what the other person has to say. Are you an excellent listener? Then use this skill to your advantage and focus on the conversation. This will be noticed, and you will certainly make a lasting impression.
Tip #7: Create value
One of the best ways to connect is to add value to the dialogue. Introverts, as I said, are thoughtful and can quickly solve a particular problem. If you help a person with his question, he will definitely remember you and will be happy to keep in touch. Therefore, in communication, try to understand how and how you can help the interlocutor.
Tip #8: Relax and be yourself
Last but not least, and perhaps the best advice for introverts: relax and be yourself! It often seems to introverts that in a dialogue they must pretend to be someone, “put on a mask”. But people are attracted to sincerity. So just allow yourself to express naturally. You will definitely make an impression.
Networking is a great way to make new connections, build relationships and advance your career. But if you are an introvert, this is quite a challenge. These tips will help you interact with people. Practice and you will notice that each time it is easier and more enjoyable. I am sure that very soon you will become a networking professional.
Does the denomination threaten the Russian ruble: what is the essence and reasons
Being a procedure that strengthens the national currency, the denomination excites the minds of Russians. However, few people distinguish between the concepts of denomination, inflation and devaluation. Should we wait for the ruble reform?
Will there be a denomination?
What year was the denomination, and what were its causes?
The history of the monetary reform of the Russian Federation
Denomination of the ruble in Russia: beginning or end?
Denomination - the crux of the matter in one paragraph
Will there be a denomination?
First, let's understand the terms.
- Inflation is the process of price increase. Equal to 0-10%, it is considered normal.
- Devaluation is the depreciation of the national currency compared to the stable exchange rate of others.
- Denomination - getting rid of the money supply by reducing the zeros in banknotes, i.e., the enlargement of banknotes.
Based on the terminology, nothing terrible awaits the Russians. The State Duma Committee on Credit Organizations answered the question "Will there be a denomination" in the negative. It is not expected due to low inflation.
The history of the monetary reform of the Russian Federation
In 1769, Catherine II carried out the first monetary reform in Russia, which resulted in the paper ruble (banknote).
Under Nicholas I, during the Crimean War (1853-1857), banknotes were no longer accepted at exchange offices. There was a complete autonomy of the circulation of paper money.
Tsar Nicholas II in 1895-1897 made the ruble the strongest and most stable currency in Europe due to the gold backing of banknotes. 1 paper ruble was equal to 1 gold ruble.
After the destruction of the autocracy, the ruble staggered again. In Soviet times, attempts were made to strengthen the national currency through its physical support, which were unsuccessful.
Today you can observe the prerequisites for a new monetary reform, but the most profitable investment now is the purchase of real estate or the opening of foreign currency deposits under the guidance of leading banking institutions.
Ruble denomination in Russia: beginning or end?
Modern media technologies are designed to destabilize the situation in the country, frightening the population with impending financial catastrophes. However, practice shows that the denomination of the ruble in Russia is an extreme painless measure to stabilize the economy.
We can remain calm for the following reasons:
- Electronic circulation has practically replaced the ruble from extensive use.
- The monetary state structure in the Russian Federation is stable and not as emotional as in European countries.
- If the banknotes are to be replaced, it will not be in the near future due to the high cost of the banknote exchange procedure itself, sometimes lasting more than a year.
Denomination - the essence of the matter in one paragraph
The process of exchanging old banknotes for new ones is termed "denomination". Essence: reorganization of relations between the government and the population, increasing confidence in the national currency.
If outside forces intervene in the economic sphere of the country, carrying out shameless swindlers with cash circulation, a default may occur.
Consequences of "poor quality" denomination:
- Panic among the common population, as well as among depositors and investors.
- Rising inflation.
- Rapid price hike against the backdrop of low wage increases and social benefits.
- Ruble depreciation.
Advice from Sravni.ru: Do not panic and follow the news from official sources: the Central Bank and the Ministry of Economic Development.