Why men jack off

Facts About Male & Female Masturbation

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Masturbation

Is Masturbation Healthy?

It’s totally normal to masturbate (touch yourself for sexual pleasure) whether you’re sexually active with other people or not. Masturbation even has health benefits, like reducing stress.

Do most people masturbate?

Lots of people masturbate! Even if they don't talk about it, it’s common for people of any gender or age to do it. Even before puberty, children sometimes discover that touching their genitals feels good. If you have kids and notice them touching their genitals, let them know that masturbating is completely normal, but something they should do in private.

People masturbate for different reasons — it helps them relax, they want to understand their body better, they want to release sexual tension, or their partner isn’t around. But most people masturbate because it feels good. Many people think that masturbation is only something you do when you don’t have a sex partner. But both single people and people in relationships masturbate.

Some people masturbate often, others rarely, and some people don’t masturbate at all. Different people masturbate in different ways, for different reasons. Masturbation is a totally personal decision, and there’s no “normal” way to go about it.

Is it OK to masturbate if you’re in a relationship?

Definitely. Lots of people in relationships masturbate. Masturbating when you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean your partner isn’t satisfying you. It’s a great way to figure out what you like and what makes you have an orgasm. Then you can show or tell your partner what feels good. Talking about sex with your partner can make it more fun and can even make your relationship stronger. Some people masturbate at the same time as their partner. It’s a way to be sexual together without having any risk of STDs or pregnancy.

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Male Masturbation: What Does It Mean?

Written by WebMD Editorial Contributors

Medically Reviewed by Dan Brennan, MD on June 29, 2021

Male masturbation is nothing to be embarrassed about. Masturbation is natural, and even children up to the ages five and six partake in masturbation because of their curiosity about their own bodies. So, it is important to tell younger men that their masturbation is okay and nothing to be ashamed about, even though it should be done in private. If you have any questions about masturbation, the best person to ask is your doctor.

Other Names for Male Masturbation

Male masturbation is called different names by different people. Some informally refer to male masturbation as “pleasuring oneself” or “playing with oneself.” There is also an abundance of slang words for masturbation, such as “wanking,” “jerking off,” and “jacking off.”

Myths and Misconceptions about Masturbation

Male masturbation is common, normal, and healthy, but many people have been told for years that masturbation is “dirty” or “inappropriate”. As a result, it can bring complicated or conflicting feelings, such as guilt. If you have guilt, talk with someone you trust. A therapist or medical professional can be helpful.

Likewise, male masturbation is not harmful to sexual organs. The most common risk is tender or chafed skin, which can be prevented with lubricant.

How Masturbation Works in Relationships

If you’re in a relationship, you can still masturbate. It can help to avoid any guilt on the part of a partner who does not want to engage in as much sexual activity as the “higher frequency” partner.

If, on the other hand, your partner starts to feel upset about your masturbation, communicate clearly to them why it is important to you. And be sure to come into this conversation with understanding. If you are masturbating frequently, your partner could feel inferior when compared to your ability to pleasure yourself. Reassurance and communication are key in these relationship scenarios. If problems progress, it could help to talk with a sex counselor.

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reasons that men and specialists themselves say

You wake up in the morning and realize that your boyfriend, who is lying next to you in bed, is engaged in self-satisfaction. Do you want to tell him: “Baby, what about me”? And in general, how to behave in such a situation and why do men masturbate in general, even if they are in a relationship?

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According to statistics, about 80 percent of men and almost 50 percent of women masturbate. In fact, the numbers are higher. Today we are not talking about women. But they are often concerned with the question: why do men like to masturbate? And when they notice their boyfriend masturbating, they begin to worry themselves: “My boyfriend is no longer interested in me, he doesn’t like sex with me!”

Why do men often masturbate? Yes, if only because men and women perceive sex differently Men can do this to relieve stress, and women can do it to find harmony with their partner. 0003

But why does he masturbate, instead of waking up a living, beloved and seemingly usually desired girl sleeping next to him?

Because ... wants to masturbate

"I confess, I have this sexual fantasy: the girl woke up, caught me and ... joined!" Roman (25)

Why do guys masturbate? one of the erotic fantasies that they do not dare to say out loud. But if the girl herself is not averse to taking the initiative and starting first, such a process can diversify intimate life. And most importantly, it will allow you to be closer to each other, show more trust.

“This happened to me during the preparation for the case - when I planned to wake the girl up with sex or cunnilingus. But in the process I got carried away, with whom it does not happen. Another possible reason is that the girl herself is a sexual fantasy. It's nice to look at her, it's nice to dream about her. In any case, such a situation is a manifestation of a man's trust in a woman. If I didn’t trust, I went to the bathroom. So not "Why didn't you wake me up?!" but "Do you mind if I join?" Valery (28)

Masturbation as self-love

In Holland, for example, masturbation is considered extremely important. There is even a Rotterdam Center for Self-Satisfaction, where self-love is studied as a science. Students are taught theory and applied disciplines, such as "Masturbation and aesthetic pleasure" or "Contemplation of natural landscapes during masturbation." Why do men masturbate? In this country, such a piquant topic became the subject of research by scientists who saw important psychological aspects in male self-satisfaction. There is no other country in the world with such concern for men's health.

Because ... cares

Why do men want to masturbate? As ironic as it may sound, sometimes they do it out of love and respect for their partner. And what if she has “those days” and she definitely doesn’t have time for sex, but a man needs a release? That's when they, too, can resort to self-satisfaction.

“If a wife runs so much during the day that she is unlikely to be able to fully indulge in sex at night, I won’t wake her up. But if it's not, I try to stir it up. Soft". Marat (29)

Male animals also masturbate. Porcupines in a state of sexual arousal walk on three legs, and the fourth is kept on the genitals. An elephant stimulates a semi-erect penis with its trunk. Even if self-satisfaction is inherent in animals by nature, then what can we say about people. It is not always possible to find bad sides in this process. Sometimes a man, being in a relationship, satisfies himself for the sake of taking care of his beloved.

Because ... has the right to masturbate

“For men, masturbation is an expression of freedom: he wanted to have sex with his woman, he wanted to have sex with himself. If a girl often reproaches him for this (they say, you have me!), She may lose her beloved. Don't encroach on our rights!" Eugene (27)

Masturbation is a legal right

According to the definition of the World Health Organization, masturbation is "the legal right of a person to give himself pleasure and dispose of his own body." Therefore, before asking the question: "Why do men want to masturbate?", remember that everyone has the right to dispose of his body and his desires.

Because...wants to relieve stress quickly

“Masturbation is a way to relieve stress. And quite energy-intensive: no need to involve the girl, think about her pleasure, puff and move. It's just you, your hand, and here it is - detente. Igor (32)

Why do men masturbate? Yes, the representatives of the stronger sex have such a feature. They can relieve stress in two ways - sex or alcohol. Everyone chooses what he likes. In favor of self-satisfaction is the fact that he requires less various costs from a man. There is no need to persuade a woman to have intimacy, create a suitable atmosphere, waste time on foreplay. I just went to the toilet, took out my "unit", a few minutes and the discharge was received.

“It's faster and sometimes more enjoyable, especially if you're tired, than having sex. He jerked the shutter and with a sense of satisfaction (including moral) - to sleep! But just “masturbating a girl” (waking her up for an erection) is much more disrespectful. Michael (31)

Millions of people masturbate

Don't be surprised when you wonder why a man masturbates. In fact, 50 million people masturbate every second in the world! And if you saw your boyfriend in the process of self-satisfaction, just mentally write in this list of perfectly normal people who needed a quick discharge at that moment.

Because ...likes and/or is lazy

“I often masturbate when my partner is asleep. Often after sex. Why? Yes, because I love doing it. For no particular reason." Gennady, (27)

Why do men masturbate even when in a relationship with the woman they love. Simply because they enjoy the process. And they see no other reasons for masturbation.

“Do you want to be honest? Sometimes too lazy to strain. Sex is more than an hour, and then you still need to wash, smoke. And get up early for work. And not all women like being woken up.” Denis (32)

Men in relationships often masturbate

Men in stable relationships masturbate more often than women in relationships. Why do men masturbate? The answers are above. You should not make a big deal out of molehills when the partner's relationship is still strong and he talks about his love. He likes self-satisfaction, which means that he considers it necessary for his body.

Because... the girl refused

It happened to me when a girl refused sex. She lies all so beautiful, half asleep and absolutely uninterested in my erection. Well, what to do? Just masturbate! Kirill, (31)

Why do men want to masturbate? But this is the very case when the reason may be in the woman herself. She showed no interest in her partner, turned out to be not interested in intimacy, rudely responded to his offer to have sex. And the guy has nothing left but self-satisfaction.

A woman rarely wants sex so-and-so, that she is ready to sacrifice sleep and a rested appearance in the morning, but a man - easily. Well, since she refused and is sleeping, then I will be alone with myself. Maxim, (27)

Masturbation as a threat to relationships

Why does a man masturbate? Because he lacks intimacy, tenderness, care, attention and corny - sex. Sexual dissatisfaction can be a serious threat to a relationship. Experts put this reason on a par with psychological incompatibility, which, according to statistics, most often leads to divorce.

"The reason is simple: I had an erection, but I didn't wake up the miracle that was sniffing nearby." Andrey (37 )

But if a partner often refuses offers of sex, a man may start thinking about what he can find himself and another woman.

Why does a man masturbate: what do women say

How do girls react when they find their beloved doing an interesting activity? They... are silent. Why a guy masturbates remains a mystery to her. She begins to imagine that he has another, he has taken a mistress. But the lack of knowledge of how to be in such a situation creates an awkward situation. And women are really just silent and don't know how to behave.

Women are silent

“When I realized that my husband lying next to me was masturbating, I wanted to. .. joke. But she resisted, remembering that laughter and sex are not always compatible. I waited for him to finish and fell asleep." Tatyana, (26)

I convinced myself that it seemed to me. After all, it can't be that he masturbates instead of waking me up! Especially since we just went to bed.” Ekaterina, (24)

When a guy masturbates, women join the process

“I am absolutely calm about the fact that my man masturbates - it means that at the moment he has chosen this type of pleasure. I also have different desires. And if I want, I can just join.” Ekaterina, (23)

“I think the best option in such a situation is to help my MCH, as much as I have enough vigor (I’m awake!) and imagination.” Lina, (24)

Fortunately, many women are able to understand their partner and avoid unnecessary questions: “Why does my boyfriend masturbate?”

Ask questions

“I was a bit taken aback when I found him masturbating. But she did not think of anything, but simply asked why. He honestly answered that he woke up from sexual arousal, began to pester me, but I refused through a dream, and he didn’t go to the bathroom, because it’s more pleasant to do this when there is a half-naked beloved nearby. After this frank conversation, we had great sex. And now, when he suddenly wakes up in the middle of the night, he always wakes me up.” Tatyana, (27)

And sometimes a right and timely question, as well as an honest answer to it, allows a couple to become closer. Why a man masturbates - found out. Found the reasons. And got rid of them.

Everyone understands

“I don't mind. And I even admit that he, lying next to me, fantasizes about the other. The main thing is not to go to this other person in reality. His fantasies are part of his personal space, which cannot be deprived of. Evgeniya, (30)

Why do men masturbate? Yes, sometimes in their fantasies they imagine another woman, for example, a famous actress. But that doesn't mean the guy is cheating.

Happy when a guy masturbates

Why does a guy masturbate? Because he cares about his partner and does not want to wake her up? And why does a woman, noticing him in the process of self-satisfaction, not ask questions? Because she understood without words and does not want to start explaining how terribly tired she was during the day, and that she has no time for sex?

“I was glad he didn't wake me up. That day I was tired, I was exhausted. Well done for not bothering me." Lika, (30)

“I distinguish between making love for feelings and masturbation for stress relief. It would be unpleasant for me if he woke me not for the sake of love, but for the sake of his desire to "blow off steam." Alena, (29)

They get indignant when a guy masturbates

“I think it’s right to be indignant out loud, but not to offend: “Why didn’t you wake me up? You know, I always want you!” Marina, (22)

Such words are surely pleasant to every man. And to the question - why do men masturbate, there is one answer: because there is not always mutual understanding with their partner.

They answer the same

“We have the opposite. Sometimes it’s me who can’t sleep and pornographic thoughts come into my head. It's a shame to wake up your husband. It would be better if three kingpins fall in love with me in fantasies than I disturb him.” Alina, (27)

Women are not alien to self-satisfaction. If you wonder why guys masturbate, it can be redirected to girls too, because women do it too.

Scientific causes of male masturbation

Why does a man masturbate? Sexologist Valery Saltykov believes that the absolute number of sexually mature men are prone to self-satisfaction, and they do it if possible, and not at will, as is commonly believed. And he adds that a man will begin to masturbate even if he has two permanent sexual partners. Either a low sexual need or religious taboos can make him neglect self-satisfaction.

Alena August, psychotherapist, VIP coach, says: “I can say one thing for sure: no one should worry, but you can and should think about why this is happening. Why does a man masturbate and when should you worry about it?

1. It should be remembered that masturbation for a man is an easy way to relieve stress. Why is he not doing this with his beloved? Because a girl needs kisses and caresses, assurances of feelings and gentle words, an aura and an atmosphere. Masturbation, on the other hand, guarantees an "ambulance" without candles, roses and champagne. That's why guys masturbate even when they have a regular partner.

1. Sex with a partner and other ways of satisfaction coexist perfectly in the mind and life of a man. And here, believe me, we are not talking about competition. Love is love, and the desire to experience an orgasm is a separate issue. Why does a man masturbate? Everything is simple - for the sake of orgasm.

3. A girl who finds herself in such a situation not for the first time should honestly answer the questions, how long ago did you have sex, is it varied, has it lost its sharpness. It is also not superfluous to look from the outside at your life together: is it overgrown with routine and boredom. Why does a man masturbate? Because your sex life has become boring, monotonous and uninteresting.

Be sure to talk to your loved one about his expectations and dreams, doubts and claims. Be ready to hear criticism and remember that talking personal with your partner is a sign of respect and trust. And together you can make intimate - and not only - life richer and brighter.

Recorded by Olga Cherednichenko
Photo: GETTY IMAGES/FOTOBANK.RU

10 reasons why a husband engages in masturbation

Sex for a man and a woman are completely different things. Roughly speaking, for him this is the ordinary prose of Leo Tolstoy, and for her it is the intimate lyrics of Sergei Yesenin. If for a man sex is just a way to discharge in a busy rhythm of work and rest (this is actually true, sometimes more energy is spent on a match of your favorite team than a month of work), then for a woman sex is a way to find harmony and plunge into a whirlpool passion, writes malina-mix.com.

Therefore, by and large, feelings are not important for a man - his passion is not born in the head that is on his shoulders. And if there are exceptions, they, for the most part, end as quickly as they are born. Of course, you can argue, but it's true.

According to statistics, 80% of men and 50% of women masturbate. In reality, the numbers are higher. Let's not talk about the beautiful half - this is a topic for a completely different article, but about men ...

And they masturbate not only in the absence of a partner, but also in the presence of a wife (girlfriend). Why? We can highlight 10 reasons for this behavior, as well as find out what to do if your loved one “betrays” you in this way.

Stress

A man can relieve stress in two ways - get drunk or have sex. Moreover, the second is possible in two versions: with a woman or with his own hand. Everyone, of course, chooses what is closer to him. In favor of masturbation, the factor of less effort and energy can play: I went to the toilet, took out the unit, a few minutes - and there was no stress.

Here purely physiological moments play their part. With nervous excitement, the flow of blood increases and an erection occurs.

What if your loved one does this? Try to carefully explain to him that you understand him perfectly: his work is stressful, and you will be happy to help him forget about them.

Show that you do not care about your own pleasure, but about how to make him feel good. Otherwise, a man will simply get used to masturbation, and with the help of it he will not only relieve stress. Masturbation will completely replace you!

Wife became uninteresting

After marriage, you gained a dozen extra pounds, use cosmetics only when you go to work, walk around the apartment in a greasy bathrobe, take a shower in the morning, and not before bedtime - all this affects your relationship in one way or another. A man still wants sex, but not with you.

Then he will buy erotic magazines and videos, often and for a long time retire to the toilet with a fresh issue of Playboy. Thus, the case can end with infidelity with other women.

To the question “What to do?” - the answer is simple. No need to calm down and cool down. The main reason for adultery and divorce is when the routine absorbs passion and romance.

Moreover, both partners are making efforts towards a similar outcome. One - by his behavior, the other - by silence. Therefore, when a man begins to retire, you should definitely talk to him, find out the reason. And if it is in you, then you need to urgently change something in yourself.

Lack of sex

In general, quite a rare occurrence. Usually a woman does not have enough sex: a man, having done his job, turns away to the wall and sleeps, and a woman sometimes reaches an orgasm on her own. But the opposite also happens: when a man wants every day, and his wife only from time to time. Of course, when you really want to, but you can’t, you still somehow need to exist. So the solution is masturbation.

At first you don't notice it, then you start guessing. And when you suddenly find him doing this, you are embarrassed. You cannot ask him about the reasons for this behavior, and he is uncomfortable even starting this topic.

Therefore, if you understand that you are not satisfying a man, try to give him more pleasure, use other positions, lubricants (for example, a lubricant to increase the duration of sex).

If you have sex in a missionary position or in a position where a woman makes almost no active movements, shifting all the stress to her partner, then the man will be more tired and the effect of sex will be greater.

I don't feel like exerting myself

Or, in other words, simple laziness can be the reason for masturbation. For the most part, sex for a man is really just an induction-withdrawal process and nothing more. Therefore, such a man thinks, why strain to give more pleasure to his partner than to himself, if you can just masturbate?

In the end, after such “sex” you don't need to see anyone off and hug – you can even safely roll over and fall asleep: no one will say a word.

The reason for this behavior is psychological, so it is rather difficult to correct it. Unless to explain in practice that no masturbation will replace him with sex with you.

Finally, make sure that he understands the basic rule of sex - the main thing is that you both feel good. Only if he realizes this will he begin to change. And if not, then he will continue to be an egoist, with whom it is hardly necessary to continue relations.

Cannot get satisfaction from sex

Psychological problem again. Moreover, it’s just a fiction that there is no pleasure from sex, but there is from masturbation. The reasons are quite simple: a small penis size, self-doubt, some kind of internal resentment.

All this leads to isolation, obsession with one's own inferiority, and, ultimately, marriage to the first woman who shows sympathy for him and worries about him.

Being constantly morally “downtrodden”, such a man will not be able to enjoy sex, and the only joy for him will be banal onanism. Whatever the wife does, it will be difficult to change the intimate worldview of her beloved. He will probably remain just as closed and bashful if he does not increase his own self-esteem.

What to do? There are three options. Or try to change something, show him what a good man he is, use new positions, do whatever he wants in bed, or take everything as it is and calm down. Or just break up with such a man.

Thinks it can make you lose weight

Yes, this is indeed one of the reasons. A friend of mine read somewhere that 5 minutes of masturbation replaces half an hour of training in the gym. And he somehow calculated (based on the kilocalories spent during the “classes”) that if he masturbated three times a day for a month, he would lose 12 kilograms.

Further, more. Since the gym exercises involve a load on different muscles, he rummaged through the Internet and found a practical manual for an onanist. It was written in what positions you need to masturbate in order to simulate anal sex, the position from above, from below, from the side, and the like.

And, you know, instead of regularly having sex with his girlfriend, he exhausted himself with daily masturbation, expended a lot of energy and ate and drank just as much because of it. In the end, he gained 5 kilos. And signed up for the pool.

Of course, a man who believes in such amazing properties of onanism will not tell his missus what he is actually doing in order to surprise her with his new figure. But at the time of these trainings, he, of course, will not have the strength to satisfy his wife.

Therefore, it only remains for her to sympathize and advise, if not to convince the unfortunate man of the absurdity of his occupation, then at least somehow wait a certain time until he himself is convinced of the uselessness of masturbation as a means of losing weight.

For him it is in the order of things

The most interesting is this point. The man thinks he should masturbate. Just like eating and drinking. Well, such is his nature, what can you do here? A woman, of course, will not understand this logic. For her, masturbation is already a sign, if not of infidelity, then of her (the woman's) imperfection in the eyes of her husband. Explaining to him that he is wrong is like hammering a nail with a computer.

Therefore, in this case, use his hobby for the benefit of your relationship. Say that you enjoy watching him masturbate and you will gladly join him. Ultimately, look at it as one of the sex games, incredibly exciting and unusual.

I want another woman, but I don't want to betray

Even if we look at the history of mankind, we see harems in the East and courtesans in the West. Of course, a man who loves his wife and does not want to hurt her will never betray.

But if he wants something new that his wife cannot give, then he can find a simple way out. You can self-satisfy by looking at a photo or video of the woman he wants - also imagining at that moment what he is doing with her. This is change without change.

It is unlikely that a woman should do anything in this case. A man does not go to the left - why extra troubles? The only negative is that there is a certain probability that he will like such “sex” over time more than normal, or betrayal will become real.

Urgently wants sex, but no one is around

When a man “wants”, he tries to somehow satisfy his desire. For example, if you go to work before he wakes up, then the husband, feeling a morning erection, can calmly masturbate in the shower, whistling the anthem of his favorite football team. Of course, this is not a trend or a disease, but ordinary incontinence.

Unlike most of the previous cases, there is no point in fighting this. And you don't need to. Such a man is quite confident in himself, he understands that masturbation is temporary. Simply because there is no woman around. And if there is, then he does not need masturbation.

Masturbation as training

Yes, a teenager masturbates also because in this way he trains for the transition to an adult lifestyle. Some men, when reading manuals on masturbation (there are some, don't be surprised), begin to imitate all sorts of positions. They get used to it so much that they continue to do it as adults. Roughly speaking, such a man tries any novelty on himself, and only then does it with his beloved.

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