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What to do when someone tells you they are depressed


SAMHSA’s National Helpline | SAMHSA

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  • SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.

    Also visit the online treatment locator.

SAMHSA’s National Helpline, 1-800-662-HELP (4357) (also known as the Treatment Referral Routing Service), or TTY: 1-800-487-4889 is a confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders. This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations.

Also visit the online treatment locator, or send your zip code via text message: 435748 (HELP4U) to find help near you. Read more about the HELP4U text messaging service.

The service is open 24/7, 365 days a year.

English and Spanish are available if you select the option to speak with a national representative. Currently, the 435748 (HELP4U) text messaging service is only available in English.

In 2020, the Helpline received 833,598 calls. This is a 27 percent increase from 2019, when the Helpline received a total of 656,953 calls for the year.

The referral service is free of charge. If you have no insurance or are underinsured, we will refer you to your state office, which is responsible for state-funded treatment programs. In addition, we can often refer you to facilities that charge on a sliding fee scale or accept Medicare or Medicaid. If you have health insurance, you are encouraged to contact your insurer for a list of participating health care providers and facilities.

The service is confidential. We will not ask you for any personal information. We may ask for your zip code or other pertinent geographic information in order to track calls being routed to other offices or to accurately identify the local resources appropriate to your needs.

No, we do not provide counseling. Trained information specialists answer calls, transfer callers to state services or other appropriate intake centers in their states, and connect them with local assistance and support.

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Last Updated: 08/30/2022

Alcohol, Tobacco, and Other Drugs

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Misusing alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs can have both immediate and long-term health effects.

The misuse and abuse of alcohol, tobacco, illicit drugs, and prescription medications affect the health and well-being of millions of Americans. NSDUH estimates allow researchers, clinicians, policymakers, and the general public to better understand and improve the nation’s behavioral health. These reports and detailed tables present estimates from the 2021 National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH).

Alcohol

Data:

  • Among the 133.1 million current alcohol users aged 12 or older in 2021, 60.0 million people (or 45.1%) were past month binge drinkers. The percentage of people who were past month binge drinkers was highest among young adults aged 18 to 25 (29.2% or 9.8 million people), followed by adults aged 26 or older (22.4% or 49.3 million people), then by adolescents aged 12 to 17 (3.8% or 995,000 people). (2021 NSDUH)
  • Among people aged 12 to 20 in 2021, 15.1% (or 5.9 million people) were past month alcohol users. Estimates of binge alcohol use and heavy alcohol use in the past month among underage people were 8.3% (or 3.2 million people) and 1.6% (or 613,000 people), respectively. (2021 NSDUH)
  • In 2020, 50.0% of people aged 12 or older (or 138.5 million people) used alcohol in the past month (i.e., current alcohol users) (2020 NSDUH)
  • Among the 138.5 million people who were current alcohol users, 61.6 million people (or 44.4%) were classified as binge drinkers and 17.7 million people (28.8% of current binge drinkers and 12.8% of current alcohol users) were classified as heavy drinkers (2020 NSDUH)
  • The percentage of people who were past month binge alcohol users was highest among young adults aged 18 to 25 (31. 4%) compared with 22.9% of adults aged 26 or older and 4.1% of adolescents aged 12 to 17 (2020 NSDUH)
  • Excessive alcohol use can increase a person’s risk of stroke, liver cirrhosis, alcoholic hepatitis, cancer, and other serious health conditions
  • Excessive alcohol use can also lead to risk-taking behavior, including driving while impaired. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that 29 people in the United States die in motor vehicle crashes that involve an alcohol-impaired driver daily

Programs/Initiatives:

  • STOP Underage Drinking interagency portal - Interagency Coordinating Committee on the Prevention of Underage Drinking
  • Interagency Coordinating Committee on the Prevention of Underage Drinking
  • Talk. They Hear You.
  • Underage Drinking: Myths vs. Facts
  • Talking with your College-Bound Young Adult About Alcohol

Relevant links:

  • National Association of State Alcohol and Drug Abuse Directors
  • Department of Transportation Office of Drug & Alcohol Policy & Compliance
  • Alcohol Policy Information Systems Database (APIS)
  • National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism

Tobacco

Data:

  • In 2020, 20. 7% of people aged 12 or older (or 57.3 million people) used nicotine products (i.e., used tobacco products or vaped nicotine) in the past month (2020 NSDUH)
  • Among past month users of nicotine products, nearly two thirds of adolescents aged 12 to 17 (63.1%) vaped nicotine but did not use tobacco products. In contrast, 88.9% of past month nicotine product users aged 26 or older used only tobacco products (2020 NSDUH)
  • Tobacco use is the leading cause of preventable death, often leading to lung cancer, respiratory disorders, heart disease, stroke, and other serious illnesses. The CDC reports that cigarette smoking causes more than 480,000 deaths each year in the United States
  • The CDC’s Office on Smoking and Health reports that more than 16 million Americans are living with a disease caused by smoking cigarettes

Electronic cigarette (e-cigarette) use data:

  • In 2021, 13.2 million people aged 12 or older (or 4.7%) used an e-cigarette or other vaping device to vape nicotine in the past month. The percentage of people who vaped nicotine was highest among young adults aged 18 to 25 (14.1% or 4.7 million people), followed by adolescents aged 12 to 17 (5.2% or 1.4 million people), then by adults aged 26 or older (3.2% or 7.1 million people).
  • Among people aged 12 to 20 in 2021, 11.0% (or 4.3 million people) used tobacco products or used an e-cigarette or other vaping device to vape nicotine in the past month. Among people in this age group, 8.1% (or 3.1 million people) vaped nicotine, 5.4% (or 2.1 million people) used tobacco products, and 3.4% (or 1.3 million people) smoked cigarettes in the past month. (2021 NSDUH)
  • Data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s 2020 National Youth Tobacco Survey. Among both middle and high school students, current use of e-cigarettes declined from 2019 to 2020, reversing previous trends and returning current e-cigarette use to levels similar to those observed in 2018
  • E-cigarettes are not safe for youth, young adults, or pregnant women, especially because they contain nicotine and other chemicals

Resources:

  • Tips for Teens: Tobacco
  • Tips for Teens: E-cigarettes
  • Implementing Tobacco Cessation Programs in Substance Use Disorder Treatment Settings
  • Synar Amendment Program

Links:

  • Truth Initiative
  • FDA Center for Tobacco Products
  • CDC Office on Smoking and Health
  • National Institute on Drug Abuse: Tobacco, Nicotine, and E-Cigarettes
  • National Institute on Drug Abuse: E-Cigarettes

Opioids

Data:

  • Among people aged 12 or older in 2021, 3. 3% (or 9.2 million people) misused opioids (heroin or prescription pain relievers) in the past year. Among the 9.2 million people who misused opioids in the past year, 8.7 million people misused prescription pain relievers compared with 1.1 million people who used heroin. These numbers include 574,000 people who both misused prescription pain relievers and used heroin in the past year. (2021 NSDUH)
  • Among people aged 12 or older in 2020, 3.4% (or 9.5 million people) misused opioids in the past year. Among the 9.5 million people who misused opioids in the past year, 9.3 million people misused prescription pain relievers and 902,000 people used heroin (2020 NSDUH)
  • According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s Understanding the Epidemic, an average of 128 Americans die every day from an opioid overdose

Resources:

  • Medication-Assisted Treatment
  • Opioid Overdose Prevention Toolkit
  • TIP 63: Medications for Opioid Use Disorder
  • Use of Medication-Assisted Treatment for Opioid Use Disorder in Criminal Justice Settings
  • Opioid Use Disorder and Pregnancy
  • Clinical Guidance for Treating Pregnant and Parenting Women With Opioid Use Disorder and Their Infants
  • The Facts about Buprenorphine for Treatment of Opioid Addiction
  • Pregnancy Planning for Women Being Treated for Opioid Use Disorder
  • Tips for Teens: Opioids
  • Rural Opioid Technical Assistance Grants
  • Tribal Opioid Response Grants
  • Provider’s Clinical Support System - Medication Assisted Treatment Grant Program

Links:

  • National Institute on Drug Abuse: Opioids
  • National Institute on Drug Abuse: Heroin
  • HHS Prevent Opioid Abuse
  • Community Anti-Drug Coalitions of America
  • Addiction Technology Transfer Center (ATTC) Network
  • Prevention Technology Transfer Center (PTTC) Network

Marijuana

Data:

  • In 2021, marijuana was the most commonly used illicit drug, with 18. 7% of people aged 12 or older (or 52.5 million people) using it in the past year. The percentage was highest among young adults aged 18 to 25 (35.4% or 11.8 million people), followed by adults aged 26 or older (17.2% or 37.9 million people), then by adolescents aged 12 to 17 (10.5% or 2.7 million people).
  • The percentage of people who used marijuana in the past year was highest among young adults aged 18 to 25 (34.5%) compared with 16.3% of adults aged 26 or older and 10.1% of adolescents aged 12 to 17 (2020 NSDUH)
  • Marijuana can impair judgment and distort perception in the short term and can lead to memory impairment in the long term
  • Marijuana can have significant health effects on youth and pregnant women.

Resources:

  • Know the Risks of Marijuana
  • Marijuana and Pregnancy
  • Tips for Teens: Marijuana

Relevant links:

  • National Institute on Drug Abuse: Marijuana
  • Addiction Technology Transfer Centers on Marijuana
  • CDC Marijuana and Public Health

Emerging Trends in Substance Misuse:

  • Methamphetamine—In 2019, NSDUH data show that approximately 2 million people used methamphetamine in the past year. Approximately 1 million people had a methamphetamine use disorder, which was higher than the percentage in 2016, but similar to the percentages in 2015 and 2018. The National Institute on Drug Abuse Data shows that overdose death rates involving methamphetamine have quadrupled from 2011 to 2017. Frequent meth use is associated with mood disturbances, hallucinations, and paranoia.
  • Cocaine—In 2019, NSDUH data show an estimated 5.5 million people aged 12 or older were past users of cocaine, including about 778,000 users of crack. The CDC reports that overdose deaths involving have increased by one-third from 2016 to 2017. In the short term, cocaine use can result in increased blood pressure, restlessness, and irritability. In the long term, severe medical complications of cocaine use include heart attacks, seizures, and abdominal pain.
  • Kratom—In 2019, NSDUH data show that about 825,000 people had used Kratom in the past month. Kratom is a tropical plant that grows naturally in Southeast Asia with leaves that can have psychotropic effects by affecting opioid brain receptors. It is currently unregulated and has risk of abuse and dependence. The National Institute on Drug Abuse reports that health effects of Kratom can include nausea, itching, seizures, and hallucinations.

Resources:

  • Tips for Teens: Methamphetamine
  • Tips for Teens: Cocaine
  • National Institute on Drug Abuse

More SAMHSA publications on substance use prevention and treatment.

Last Updated: 01/05/2023

How to behave with a person with depression. Instructions - Meduza

Depression is one of the most common mental disorders: according to the World Health Organization as of February 2017, more than 300 million people worldwide suffer from it. The scale of the problem in Russia is harder to assess. Experts talk about almost eight million Russians suffering from depression, but specify that, most likely, there are much more of them - people with depression often do not seek help because of shame or unwillingness to admit the seriousness of their condition. Depression can be underestimated not only by the patients themselves, but also by their relatives. At the request of Meduza, the author of the remain_nameless telegram channel about mental health, Daria Chagina, tells how to properly behave with a person suffering from depression, so as not only not to harm him, but also to help. nine0003

Recognize the importance of the problem

Pop culture has taught us that depression is a kind of seasonal blues: many of us have heard (or said) "I'm depressed today." Of course, any person experiences bouts of melancholy and depression - due to lack of sleep, problems at work, a quarrel with a loved one, and even bad weather. But as soon as the surrounding circumstances change, everything returns to normal. Depression, on the other hand, is arranged differently: its causes can be deeply hidden, it greatly affects a person’s life, and only in 40% of cases goes away on its own - and even then not completely. nine0003

Depression is expressed primarily in a constant depressed state, chronic fatigue and loss of interest in things that used to please. In addition, the disease can be accompanied by various somatic manifestations: a person either suffers from insomnia, or, conversely, constantly wants to sleep. Doesn't want sex. He cannot concentrate on anything and loses his ability to work. Loses appetite or, conversely, begins to overeat. Depression can also lead to a complete loss of interest in life, a suicidal state and suicide. The diagnosis is made if the duration of symptoms is at least two weeks - but depression can last for months or even years, and it must be treated. nine0003

Risk factors for depression can range from psychological shocks or trauma, dysfunctional family situations or lack of parental love, as well as genetic predisposition or various diseases, as well as alcohol or drug use. Moreover, psychogenic depression (caused, for example, by the death of a loved one, divorce or violence) does not necessarily come immediately - people experience difficult events in different ways, and sometimes the reaction to them comes with a delay. nine0003

Show that you are there

Depressed people don't just feel lonely, they often feel ashamed and guilty about their feelings and emotions. For fear of being misunderstood, ridiculed, or rejected, they prefer to remain silent about their experiences, do not seek help, or refuse to acknowledge the seriousness of their situation. Left alone with their feelings, many try to suppress and hide them - and only more convinced of their own "abnormality", worthlessness and uselessness. As studies confirm, it is this feeling of separation from other people that can lead to suicidal thoughts - therefore, the support of relatives and friends is especially important for depressed people. Make it clear that you are there no matter what, the person’s condition does not affect your attitude towards him in any way, you understand the depth of his suffering and are ready to help. nine0003

Do not discount the feelings and experiences of a depressed person

If you have never had depression, then you are unlikely to be able to fully understand the state of your loved one. Do not try to compare it to a "bad day" or just a difficult period in life (for example, a session or a job change) and do not offer a person with depression to "pull themselves together" or "tune in to positive." Even if you sincerely want to express support, such advice will only devalue the feelings of a person who is faced with depression, because he knows that everything is not so simple. People in this situation often hear, “Others have worse problems than you”, “It’s all in your head”, “Do something useful”, but all this only causes more shame, guilt or annoyance due to helplessness in the face of illness. Hearing something like this, a person may conclude that you will never understand him, and close up - then it will be much more difficult to help. If you don’t know what to say in such a situation (and this is normal), just hug, say: “I can’t even imagine what you are experiencing right now, but I see that it is very difficult” - and let the person show feelings in the way he it's necessary. nine0003

Don't take the words and actions of a depressed person personally.

People with depression are generally not able to lead the same active lifestyle as before. For example, they stop responding to messages and calls, refuse offers to go out to dinner or to the movies, they may even miss your birthday or wedding. This looks strange and insulting: after all, quite recently everything was in order, and today a person comes up with reasons to avoid a meeting. And if he nevertheless agrees to it, he can behave indifferently and not even try to pretend that he is interested in listening to you. nine0003

It's not about you at all - it's just that in a depressed state, most often there is no strength for anything. Even such simple, ordinary things as getting out of bed, taking a shower and preparing breakfast require a lot of effort. It is all the more difficult to go somewhere where there will be a lot of people. In addition, communication with people itself, even if it is not binding, requires a return, for which a depressed person does not have enough emotional resources. Remember that depressed people feel and appreciate the support of their family and friends, but they simply cannot respond to it in the same way as before. nine0003

Suggest seeking professional help

Depression doesn't often go away on its own—but even if it does, it can come back. According to statistics, 50% of people who have had a depressive episode in their lives have a second one after some time, and 80% of people who have two depressive episodes in their medical history sooner or later have a third. So if you suspect depression, a person should definitely see a specialist - first of all, a psychiatrist who can prescribe drugs if necessary. True, it is also very difficult for many to take this step: going to the doctor is considered something like a “last resort”, an admission of defeat. Antidepressants are also treated with great apprehension, although now there is a large selection of funds - and a competent specialist will be able to choose the right ones in each individual case. Yes, it doesn’t always work right away, but often you can’t do without medication. nine0003

Your loved one may be seriously afraid of going to the doctor because of the fear that he will be labeled as "mentally ill", "registered" or even "put in a fool". In fact, psychiatric registration was canceled back in the early 90s, and a person can be placed in a hospital against their will only by a court decision - or if a person poses a threat to himself and is not able to take care of himself. But if your loved one is still haunted by the fear of free medicine, advise him to contact a private specialist - if possible. nine0003

Tell the person with depression that more and more people are going to therapy and it really helps. After all, with a fracture, your friend would go to the surgeon - so in this case, you need to see a doctor. Offer help in finding a psychiatrist, offer to give a ride to an appointment or just see them off. But in no case do not shame and do not force.

Help with the simplest things (but in moderation)

When a person close to you cannot do some things due to illness, there is a desire to take everything upon yourself. You really can help, but here you need to know when to stop. nine0003

If you live together, help with daily chores: waking up and going to bed on time, remembering to take a shower or soak in the bath, eat well, and remember to take medication if prescribed. The correct daily routine helps to maintain some kind of balance even in the most difficult condition. You can try to involve a person in physical exercises - studies confirm that sports help in the treatment and prevention of depression. Moreover, it is the regularity of classes, and not their intensity, that plays the key role - you need to exercise for at least three months and for 45-60 minutes. Workouts on a pulse of 120-130 beats per minute are best suited: running, walking, swimming, cycling, tennis, dancing. nine0003

Offer useful applications

When depressed, it is useful to monitor how your mood changes over time - there are many paid and free mobile applications in Google Play and the App Store for this. For example, Moodnotes. When creating the application, the developers relied on the method of cognitive behavioral therapy, so in it you can not only note what you think about and how you feel today, but also track what causes certain thoughts and moods. You can also keep a mood diary through the How Are You and MoodPanda apps. nine0003

Mindfulness meditation apps can also be useful. It forms the basis of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), which is now gaining popularity in the United States. The main goal is to help get rid of the tendency to automatically respond to thoughts, emotions and life events. Perhaps the best mobile app for this is Headspace; it's available on both iOS and Android, but it's a paid subscription for $12.99 a month (I must say it's loved by many who don't have a depression problem, too). A free alternative to it could be Stop, Breathe & Think. But, of course, we must remember that neither meditation nor a mood diary can replace treatment, but can only be a help (well, it doesn’t hurt to discuss these practices with your doctor). nine0003

Be attentive and patient

The process of treating depression is long and hard. How much time and effort it will take depends on the severity of depression (mild, moderate, severe), and on the chosen treatment method (only taking pills, only psychotherapy, or both), and on how quickly it turned out to pick up the right pills and their dosage and, finally, whether it was possible to find a suitable psychotherapist. It also happens that a psychotherapist is good, but not suitable. Even if you have done everything you could and the healing process has begun, you should not expect an immediate result. Don't ask, "Are you feeling better?" - It may seem to a depressed person that progress in his treatment does not meet your expectations. nine0003

Instead, ask delicately from time to time if he remembers to take his pills, if he misses psychiatric and/or psychotherapist appointments, and if so, try to carefully find out why. For example, in psychotherapy there is such a thing as "resistance" - the patient's subconscious opposition to the process of psychotherapy. This phenomenon is associated with the fear of change, because it is far from always easy and painless to come to a cure. Resistance in psychotherapy can be expressed in many ways, including just missing meetings or refusing to continue psychotherapy in principle. Dealing with this is the work of a psychotherapist, but a careful, confidential conversation with a loved one can also help. nine0003

Take care of yourself

Being around a depressed person can be exhausting. Especially if this is a person close to you, to whose condition you cannot be indifferent. Nevertheless, do not forget the main rule from the instructions for behavior in emergency situations: you must first put on the oxygen mask. You may feel like you have to stay strong for your loved one, but you don't have to sacrifice your comfort and convenience. Don't forget that you have your own worries and feelings. If you make it your goal to get your loved one out of depression at all costs and forget about everything else, there is a risk that you will undermine your own health. To avoid this, try to clearly define what you are ready and able to do and what you are not. Listen to your feelings and emotions and seek support if you need it (including from a psychotherapist). After all, you can do little to help a depressed person if you yourself are not okay. nine0003

Daria Chagina

The editorial office thanks for the help in preparing the material of the head physician of the Udensrosa clinic Evgenia Zhovnia

"We were taught that we can’t whine": how to accept and overcome depression

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Video caption,

Awkward questions: what does it mean to live with depression?

Many people live with depression for years without realizing it. Everyone has autumn blues, bad days, self-doubt, but depression is not just a bad mood.

In modern society, this is one of the most common mental disorders, in the worst cases ending in premature death. According to the latest WHO estimates, more than 300 million people worldwide suffer from depression. nine0003

The BBC Russian service talked to people who have experienced depression about the stereotypes and myths associated with it, as well as about how to overcome this disease.

Image caption,

Sasha Mashin was diagnosed with clinical depression and was fully rehabilitated a year later. Yana Mandrykina overcame depression within a year

Stereotypes about depression

"Depression does not exist. Psychotherapists invented it to make money"

Zhenya Golomuz: I have changed enough psychotherapists and I can say that many of them really use depression to make money. They increase the number of sessions, make them come twice a week, supposedly one session is not enough. But there are also decent people, they really understand your problem, because very often they themselves went through depression before becoming psychotherapists. As in any profession, there are charlatans among psychotherapists and psychiatrists. nine0003

Irina Urnova: I had a psychotherapist who started doing things that shouldn't be done. He started belittling my problems, saying that my problem is not a problem. We stopped dating.

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"It's a disease of selfish"

Sasha Machine: Rather, it is a disease of perfectionists. It often happens to those people who are trying to achieve a cool result in some kind of activity.

Kirill Cheremisov: I know a lot of selfish people who don't get sick. On the contrary, during depression you do not love yourself, but in order to recover, you need to love. One of the points of psychotherapy, psychoanalysis and other techniques is to develop self-love.

Image description,

Anastasia Tropp (left) had several periods of depression, the longest one lasting a year and a half. Zhenya Golomuz (right) was clinically depressed for almost two years and recovered from it for three years

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Do something useful!"

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The End of the Story Podcast

Zhenya Golomuz: I am always doing something useful, I am constantly helping people. If I don’t benefit people, I figure out how to benefit people, because it really helps in life. nine0003

Kirill Cheremisov: We were taught not to whine. This is a weakness. You have to be strong. Boys shouldn't cry. You need to feel sorry for yourself. This is fine. Why not?

Kristina Butaeva: We must admit this. Yes, I do feel sorry for myself at the moment. Why should I stop doing this?

Sasha Mashin: Imagine that you broke your leg. And you say to yourself: dude, pull yourself together, you're not a rag. A real man. Depression is not laziness in you. This is a disease that requires professional treatment. nine0003

Yana Mandrykina: By the way, I broke my leg this year. It would have been strange if I hadn't called an ambulance.

Vera Kornakova: I want you to be sorry, but you cannot accept this concern for yourself.

Irina Urnova: And this care is never enough. She is annoying. Everything is not right.

Photo caption,

Vera Kornakova (left) suffered from depression twice, of which she was hospitalized once. Irina Urnova (right) has borderline personality disorder

"You've become so boring, you can't go out anywhere!"

Zhenya Golomuz: You need to be able to explain depression to people, because it seems to them that nothing is visible, nothing hurts, so everything is all right with you. And why are you even lying on the bed again? The concert is great, let's go for a drink.

Irina Urnova: I had friends and acquaintances who said: "You are dragging me down with you." Perhaps it was, it was hard for them, but it does not help. For friends of those who are depressed, I would advise either to help or to move away altogether. nine0003

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"Stop pretending. You have to pull yourself together!"

Zhenya Golomuz: Stop pretending - that's the worst thing you can say, because at some point it began to seem to me that maybe I'm actually pretending? Maybe I'm really a lazy pig? nine0003

Kristina Butaeva: These phrases devalue a person's feelings. Wait, I just wanted to tell you that I am really weak at this moment. Why don't you want to admit it? From the phrase "be strong" in a state of depression, you become weaker. On the outside you can't confess, but on the inside you're helpless. Such phrases drive.

Kirill Cheremisov: Of course, they are driven. They make it even weaker, as if they are saying: you should be ashamed. These are all models of behavior imposed by society that prevent you from understanding your condition. nine0003

Sasha Mashin: Chemistry in the head is changing - some substances have become less, others have become more. You can no longer help yourself. You need to change this chemistry by contacting a doctor. It's impossible to take control of yourself. There is no chance for this.

Vera Kornakova: Many people think that you are pretending, but this is due to a lack of understanding of what is happening. The degree of empathy in a person is not such as to feel what is wrong with you.

Image caption,

Kristina Butaeva recovered from her depression thanks to her work with a specialist. Kirill Cheremisov managed to cope with depression in 9 years0003

"This is weakness, be strong! There are people who are much worse"

Zhenya Golomuz: I had my first episode of depression at the age of 14. I came home and said: I have depression. My parents say to me: Zhenya, are you completely crazy? Here, read "Robinson Crusoe", he was much worse. He was generally alone, but you have everything: an apartment, a cool school, English from morning to evening. Depression is definitely not for the weak, because to admit that you have depression, you need to be super strong. nine0003

Kristina Butaeva: At the very beginning it was embarrassing to whine, embarrassing to admit it to myself. After all, life goes on. And I would like to say: I'm sad now. But you are so expected to smile when you go somewhere or participate in a party. We have to comply, and there is great disharmony in this. For the first time, I could only have a nap with a specialist. Finally I was able to say: I feel bad, yes!

Kirill Cheremisov: Yes, there are starving children in Angola, and this factor should work, but it doesn't. nine0003

Anastasia Tropp: Many of my friends still don't know that I had depression. For some reason, I was so ashamed to tell my friends that I was in this state. I was embarrassed to dump my problems on them. When they found out, they made round eyes and said that I had thought of something.

Living with depression: a personal experience

How does it happen?

Zhenya Golomuz: You stop going to work, then you stop leaving the room, getting out of bed, then you stop rolling over, then you just look into the pillow. Friends say: "Zhen, you could write what is bad." But I couldn’t, because communication takes a lot of strength and energy, it’s really hard to do. nine0003

Kirill Cheremisov: Constant physical fatigue and emotional exhaustion. In the morning you wake up, having slept, but you are broken and do not want anything. In the evening you come home from work barely alive. The only thing you want to do is turn off the light, lie down on the couch and turn off your phone.

Kristina Butaeva: Feeling the bottom. A wide black streak in life. Several times I caught myself thinking that it could not be worse. But it gets worse. Then I admitted to myself that I could no longer fight. Fatigue from the struggle overcame. nine0003

Yana Mandrykina: You drive and cry in the car and don't understand the reason. The condition was such that now it would crash somewhere and that's it. And I also worked all the time, about 24 hours a day. Sometimes I slept a little.

Irina Urnova: There is no special meaning in life. No need to get up in the morning, no need to go to bed earlier or later. There is no need to invent, do something, set some goals.

Vera Kornakova: An infinitely long sleep that does not bring peace. Pain that is not relieved by painkillers. And panic attacks. nine0003

Sasha Mashin: I had a concert and I couldn't figure out what to do, what to play. Everything goes out of focus, you can't focus on anything. There is a growing feeling that something is not right. I didn't have the strength to show any emotion. Cry? No strength to cry. You make a lot of claims. There is a void. It's like your brain has been de-energized. It takes a lot of time to admit that something is wrong with you. That is the problem - why people do not seek help. They think: well, that's something with the mood, somehow things are not going well. nine0003

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What is the worst thing about depression?

Zhenya Golomuz: I don't know. What's worse than the fact that you just can't get up?

Kristina Butaeva: Expectation from people. I think my depression dragged on because I honestly believed that help should come from outside. Well, now they will see how bad I am. I have a running line on my forehead. nine0003

Kirill Cheremisov: To despair and start thinking that it is impossible to get out of this state.

Yana Mandrykina: Stop appreciating life.

Sasha Mashin: During clinical depression, a lot of people come to the conclusion that ending their life is perhaps the only way to end the suffering they are experiencing. And the suffering is intense. At times you feel an ax that sticks out in your chest, a tearing sensation. And you're willing to do anything to make this feeling end. Perhaps that is why they think that the soul is in the chest. The worst thing is not knowing what is happening to you. nine0003

Anastasia Tropp: Probably when your call for help will be answered with ridicule or a frivolous attitude. If you need a person, and the person distances himself, it is very difficult. It might get you into a loop.

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Antidepressants

Zhenya Golomuz: This is horror, horror, horror! Because you become a little bit of a vegetable, but at the same time a functioning vegetable. If you have to get up because they stopped paying salaries and it’s time to earn some money, then antidepressants are the best thing to go out into the world. I do not recommend it on a regular basis, because you stop getting any pleasure from life, but at least you exist with them.

Yana Mandrykina: In Russia, this is just some kind of barrier. I had it too, because it is generally accepted that if you start taking antidepressants, then it means finally cuckoo. In fact, properly selected antidepressants return to normal life. What's the difference - weak or strong? Happy! Or live in fear. This is some kind of Soviet stereotype, like "guys don't cry." nine0003

Sasha Mashin: If you are thinking about a window or a chandelier, then this is absolutely the situation when you need to take antidepressants. But you don’t need to prescribe medicines to yourself, this should be done by a doctor.

Irina Urnova: The statement that any fool can take a pill, I have heard more than once. People are afraid to eat pills and there is a resource that cannot be replenished simply by rest, it must be replenished at the chemical level.

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Video caption,

Colors against depression: how makeup helped restore self-confidence

Can depression be cured?

Kirill Cheremisov: According to statistics, people who seek treatment for depression, 80-90% of them are cured. There are many techniques, great statistics. In my opinion, the most effective is psychoanalysis and cognitive therapy. If it's a severe case of illness where you can't function normally, then antidepressants and some additional medication. nine0003

Kristina Butaeva: It is important not to diagnose yourself. You'll have to try different paths. In meditation, I was strongly thrown in different directions, and I understood that I could not cope on my own. My way was - a conversation with a specialist. There was a feeling that I was alone in the room and talking to myself out loud, but she sat in front of me and periodically asked the question "why?"

Sasha Machine: He is being treated. Although a person who has experienced depression once, the chances of a repeat are seriously increased. But in this case, the problem is not to cure it, but to know what happened to you and seek help. Therefore, even if this happened again, you no longer panic, but write a message to your doctor. Literally a week and you're fine. nine0003

Yana Mandrykina: I agree. You can break your leg several times in your life. You will treat her every time, not selectively.

Zhenya Golomuz: Personally, I have never seen someone who was completely cured. It's always that kind of Alcoholics Anonymous club.

Why were you depressed?

Anastasia Tropp: This is the biggest secret. It comes from nowhere, and you don't understand at all what it could be connected with. This is a paradox, because you look at everything and want to slap yourself in the face and say: kamon, why did you arrange all this? I changed my lifestyle when I went on maternity leave and all my surroundings began to perceive me as a mother. And my old social history seemed to cease to exist for other people. For me it was a big crisis, but now everything has passed. nine0003

Kristina Butaeva: It is generally accepted that good emotions should be shared. We consider them good because our parents told us it was right. When you experience bad emotions - aggression, stress, it feels like you don't know how to express them. Getting angry is uncomfortable. You forbid yourself, you say - I'm normal, adequate, everything is in order, I read smart books. For example, take the feeling of resentment. You want to complain, but it is not clear to whom. The husband offers to pull himself together, a friend has a lot of problems at work. And it seems that the whole world is not up to you. nine0003

Kirill Cheremisov: You can't be angry with your parents, with your relatives - that's bad. You can't be angry with a child. And you hide these emotions deep down, and they accumulate. No one has ever taught us psychology how to deal with stress. Over time, you drive yourself into this state. I had a long enough stress. Anxiety causes depression, depression causes anxiety. And now you are already lying at the bottom and thinking: why did this happen to you? nine0003

Yana Mandrykina: There were many prerequisites for this. And the final trigger was the loss of friends in a disaster. This shock worked for the acute phase. I may have had a sluggish phase and then a shocking event kicked in.

Sasha Mashin: I seem to have an endogenous history and it's not about the way of thinking, but partly about genetics. There were uncomfortable conditions, but the clinical case was three years ago. He was triggered by an obsession with living in another country. And I was so focused on this thought ... I was very scared to try it and at the same time I really wanted to, because it would bring incredible results in my professional career. And these scales are a constant comparison: what is there and how is it here. What happens if I go, and if I don't? This is the state that started the process. nine0003

Irina Urnova: I am not diagnosed with bipolar disorder or manic-depressive psychosis, but I always balance between hypomania and depressive episodes - the so-called borderline personality type. In hypomania (also called atypical depression), you are alert all the time: you don’t need to sleep, you don’t need to eat, everything is fine anyway. Then this state passes and exhaustion sets in. The trigger was the death of my father and then studying abroad, where I was alone. There began a serious condition. Everyone copes with the death of a loved one differently, but many try to get through it faster and do not let themselves grieve. nine0003

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How did you manage to get out of depression?

Anastasia Tropp: Willpower. You take the will into a fist and try your best.

Zhenya Golomuz: My friends suddenly realized that I needed help. They came up with a system where one person called in the morning, the other drove to work. Therapy, pills and sports helped. Now I do not go in for sports at all, I do not take pills. Routine and reactive psychotherapy helps. As soon as you realize that it starts to cover, you remember that you need to do 12 squats, buy tickets to Europe, somewhere warm. nine0003

Kirill Cheremisov: After I admitted to myself that I was depressed, it was very difficult to tell anyone about it. But relatives understood and believed. And working with a specialist helped.

Kristina Butaeva: A conversation with a specialist and identification of a resource - I need life, I need myself, and then everyone else. And when all this becomes necessary, it helps to overcome.

Sasha Mashin: In my case it was friends who convinced me that I needed to talk to a doctor. I started treatment. It is believed that after the start of medication, somewhere in two weeks it becomes easier. I literally felt better within a week. Three weeks later I was already playing concerts. Although it seemed that everything was over in this life. I fully recovered in six months. In total, it took a year. I had clinical depression when I could not eat, wash, get out of bed. Interestingly, after the treatment, my assimilation of new information increased many times over and my working capacity increased many times over. There are people who are in a sluggish depressive state and think that their life just somehow does not add up and their mood is not very good. This is also a type of depression. There are many types of depression. nine0003

Yana Mandrykina: My friend helped me, she gave me the phone number of her doctor, who diagnosed and prescribed the right treatment. Moreover, he diagnosed not only by conversation, but conducted clinical studies. After all, treatment is not only properly selected drugs, but also a regimen, nutrition, lifestyle.

Vera Kornakova: The first time I did not ask for help, it was scary to go to a psychiatrist.

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