Submissive female traits


10 Signs of a Submissive Wife: Meaning and Characteristics

In This Article

“What does a woman want?” So asked Freud and Mark Epstein, another contemporary psychiatrist answered,” she wants a partner who cares what she wants.” Deep down, we all want to be understood and listened to. But how does it relate to a submissive wife? What does she want?

Being submissive temporarily can be a choice, but to be called a submissive wife, you need to be the one accommodating your partner’s needs all the time. It can be a marker of under-confidence and security or other problems in the relationship.

Compromise is a part of most healthy marriages, but being submissive is different. Being submissive over a long period of time can be unhealthy for the individual and the relationship. So, let’s look at the signs of being a submissive wife and its impact on them.

Meaning of a submissive wife 

Being submissive in marriage is more comparable to a boss-employee relationship. If you’re not saying what you really mean or asking for what you need, you’re denying yourself as a human being. 

This is as far from healthy teams as can be experienced. Additionally, this research shows that the signs of a submissive woman are often associated with a range of psychological problems. 

So, what signs can you expect from a compliant and sexually submissive wife? Overall, you’ll see someone who’s subservient and always looking to please. This usually comes with little or no autonomy, self-doubt, and powerlessness, as explained in this paper.

Of course, you also have strong women who show the characteristics of a submissive wife due to various societal and family pressures. Essentially though, they’ve decided to take on the life of a submissive wife willingly. 

Their approach will be different because they’ll still ensure they get their way and what they want by operating from the sidelines. This is simply another game to live in peace and get their needs met but you’ll still see the signs of a submissive woman.  

So, in this case, the signs of a submissive woman are when the partner seems in control but actually, the woman is making all the decisions. Either way, is this the way you want to play your life, based on deceit?

Is being submissive acceptable? 

We all play games with people to get what we want based on our experiences, upbringing, society and any other influences we might have been subjected to. Through every human contact, we experience feelings and sensations and the idea is to keep everything in equilibrium. 

Some people believe that you need the characteristics of a submissive wife to keep that equilibrium. The danger with focusing only on those signs is that you miss the big picture. 

Families are a system unit and an extremely submissive wife also has needs and desires. Suppressing those completely can, and does, negatively impact children. 

Also Try: Am I a Dominant or Submissive Personality Quiz

Psychiatrist Eric Berne calls the signs of a submissive woman the behaviors of a harried wife in his book ‘Games People Play. ’ He explains that a submissive wife or harried woman’s role is to play ten or twelve different roles ranging from mistress to mother, housemaid, cook and many more.

Berne points out that those roles often conflict and cause the wife’s stress and anguish, which only increases with time. The signs of a submissive woman gradually evolve from appearing balanced to one who breaks down from the pressures of trying to be too many people she’s not. 

Of course, a submissive wife might have the energy to keep up the game her whole life. In that case, she’ll find a way to vent and find the nurture she needs as a human being. 

The children are usually in the front line and can be forced to become the confidante and supporter that most women expect their husbands to be. 

Some might argue that the characteristics of a submissive wife come from someone who’s self-aware and who’s willing to give way to their partner. If this is done sporadically, then this is more accurately called compromise.  

On the other hand, a submissive wife who’s constantly compliant and obedient actually negatively impacts her ability to function socially, as detailed in this research. The same paper demonstrates that living the life of a submissive wife also leads to lower marital quality.

5 typical submissive wife behaviors 

Many wives assume the role of the submissive wife under the pretext of maintaining peace and compromising for the collective good. They may do this to maintain a friendly attitude and adhere to the traditional definition of what it means to be a wife or because of a dominating husband. 

If the submissive behavior is extreme and long-lasting, it can affect the happiness and confidence of the wife. Therefore, it becomes important to identify signs of a submissive wife.

Here are some of the typical external signs of a submissive wife are that she:

  • Curbs her opinions and thoughts to ensure peaceful communication without arguments.  
  • Glorifies the husband and makes him feel on top of the world by showing eagerness to please. 
  • Serves and obeys his demands such that his goals are met and his way is how the family lives.
  • Asks permission to buy and do things, especially when outside the norms of household duties such as hobbies and personal shopping, unless it’s to make the husband look good. 
  • Does all the household chores with no help from the husband who plays his role providing the money. 

10 signs that a wife is submissive 

Mutual compromise and reasonable adjustment levels are a healthy part of all relationships. But suffocating submission at all times is harmful.

When you see someone who is submissive, check to see what’s going on below the surface though? Many imply that submission is the same as a compromise but it has to go both ways to build a healthy marriage. 

‘Submissive in a relationship’ means to put your desires lower than someone else’s. And if only one partner is doing this repeatedly, that is unhealthy. You can expect to see some or all of the following characteristics of a submissive wife in her inner world. 

1. Follower

The expectation is that you will follow your husband to meet his goals. You support his career by putting your career on hold. Overall, the signs of a submissive woman are that she follows quietly without opposition. 

2. Passive-aggressive behavior

The signs of a submissive woman often come with passive-aggressive symptoms. Suppressing desires and opinions doesn’t make them go away. 

The characteristics of a submissive wife often include indirectly sharing negative feelings. They haven’t gone anywhere just because she’s trying to comply. 

Related Reading: How to Deal With a Passive Aggressive Spouse

3. Justifying the partner’s action

To recognize a submissive wife, listen to how much she justifies serving her husband. She’ll find many so-called facts in her belief system handed down through family or religion. 

Other signs of a submissive woman are that she justifies giving in as being kind to her husband. Although kindness is based on equality, submission is dependent behavior. 

4. Codependent

The characteristics of a submissive wife overlap heavily with codependence. Although, submission is more wilful. Nevertheless, the mind is denying its true nature and you’ll see reactivity and mental strain at some point. 

Related Reading: How to Break Codependency Habits

5. Low self-esteem

The many signs of a submissive woman often come from low self-esteem. After all, if you believe in yourself, you wouldn’t let someone dictate how you live. So, the characteristics of a submissive wife are that she suppresses her needs and emotions. 

6. Superficial act

Interestingly, some of the signs of a submissive woman come across as superficial because she’s playing a game. It comes back to the many roles expected of her. All these make the characteristics of a submissive wife in opposition to her true nature. 

7. Deferential body language 

You can easily recognize a submissive wife from the way she holds herself with hunched shoulders and a quiet demeanor. Ultimately, a submissive wife’s characteristics make her feel like a servant who’s constantly bowing to someone else. 

Related Reading: What Your Body Language Says About Your Relationship

8. Insecurity

If you’re constantly waiting for someone to decide what you should do, your confidence will decrease with time. You’ll constantly be second-guessing yourself as you try to mind-read your partner. That’s why the signs of a submissive woman often lead to self-doubt. 

Related Reading: 8 Signs Indicating Insecurity in Relationships

9. Manipulative 

A submissive wife’s role can trigger her to become manipulative in some cases. She’s still a person with wants and needs meaning that she might find more opportunistic and cunning ways to meet them. 

So, you might see the characteristics of a submissive wife as someone who is smiling and charming when her husband is around. When he’s not, her guard is down and she might portray someone resentful who takes it out on her children or others around her.

Related Reading: 12 Signs Your Woman is Manipulative

10. Quiet 

Listening without saying anything is one of the common submissive wife personality traits. Their expected role is to comply and not argue back. The house will be spotless, dinner will be ready at all the right times and all this, with a silent smile. 

Can a healthy marriage include submission?  

The American Psychological Association defines submission as “compliance with or surrender to the requests, demands, or will of others.” Interestingly, the page tells you to compare the definition for dominance, including control. This naturally pairs with the characteristics of a submissive wife. 

Control is not a word associated with a healthy marriage. Being submissive in marriage necessarily goes with having a dominant partner, no matter how subtle their behavior. Over time, other submissive wife personality traits will appear through the cracks. 

Psychologist Dr. John Gottman, in his book ‘What Predicts Divorce?’ says that if we have an unmet core need, we will have an unhappy marriage. The frustration builds because the submissive wife’s rules have denied her natural desires and either the marriage or she breaks down.

The signs of a submissive woman revolve around suppressing her core needs and desires. Otherwise, we would be talking about compromise and respecting each other’s wants and goals in life. 

Gottman lists seven factors for a healthy marriage, one of which is conflict management. You might assume that the submissive wife’s rules should stop all conflict and yes, on the surface, that’s potentially true. This is not managing conflict but simply ignoring one partner’s thoughts and feelings. 

On the contrary, you should be listening to each other, trying to understand each other and finding common ground together. None of this points to the characteristics of a submissive wife. 

To learn more about Dr. John Gottman’s notion of what it takes to maintain a happy marriage, watch this video:

The impact of being a submissive wife and how to deal

Genuine rapport with mutual empathy feels good. On the flip side, a compliant and sexually submissive wife represses her desire to serve someone else. Perhaps on the surface, only the husband benefits. Then again, do men want to marry women who aren’t true to themselves? 

Inside and outside the bedroom, shared attention is the baseline for strong rapport and closer connection, as psychologist Daniel Goleman explains in his book ‘Social Intelligence. ’ You also need warmth and coordination to develop a strong bond. 

Of course, you can fake it through the characteristics of a submissive wife. Nevertheless, this jeopardizes the harmony of needs and motives your need for a healthy partnership. This leads to potentially disastrous mental issues or creates children with their own set of issues.

Children look to their caregivers to role model attachments and relationships. If they see one of them ignoring their needs and desires to serve someone else, they could become people-pleasers later in life. 

Moreover, those children don’t learn the tools to express their own needs and emotions. This creates more submissive people who can even go over to codependency. 

Instead, work to establish your boundaries and build your self-esteem to be more assertive while staying compassionate in your relationship. There’s nothing wrong with compromise as long as it’s mutual. 

Conflict is how we grow and develop as a couple. Denying that by letting one person always have their way, is denying yourself the full breadth of human experience.  

Conclusion 

Discussing the characteristics of a submissive wife is controversial for many because our opinions are embedded in our beliefs that have been influenced by society, religion and family. Regardless of your beliefs, try to be open to companionate marriage and social connection rather than assuming that being submissive is the only option. 

We need teamwork and compromise in a healthy marriage and everyone will define that differently. Nonetheless, don’t mistake love for service, though and remember that loving another starts with our self-love. That includes standing up for your opinions, needs and desires. 

Work with a therapist to help you get the life you deserve where both a healthy marriage and your needs are met. The two are not exclusive. To be loved is not to be dominated but to be accepted as you are and not as others want you to be.

Submissive Women VS Strong Women: Who Wins at Dating?

Why do men like submissive women?

And is it even true that men like submissive women?

This article will answer those questions and give you advice on how to date effectively.

Contents

  • Submissive VS Strong Women: The Difference
    • Submissive Women Traits
    • Strong Women Traits
  • Should You Be More Submissive?
    • Women Recommend Independence, Men Submissiveness
    • Why Some Women Trick Other Women
    • Why Most  Men Don’t Give Great Advice Either
  • The Truth of Strong VS Submissive
  • What Should You Do
  • Women Aren’t Going To Tell You!
  • SUMMARY

First of all, let’s see what’s the difference.

Submissive Women Traits

Needless to say, there is no mathematical formula or an exact mix of ingredients that “certifies” submissiveness.

That being said, here are the relevant traits of submissive women:

  • Prioritize family and relationship
  • She defers to her man for decision-making
  • Is happy to take traditional roles at home (cleans, cooks, caretakes)
  • Has her girlfriends, but prefers going out with her man and family
  • Prefers to support her man than to maximize her own potential

Not all submissive women are feminine, of course.
But femininity comes more difficult to strong women and easier to submissive ones. So from now on, I will use “submissive woman” and “feminine woman” interchangeably.

Strong Women Traits

Strong women tend to be:

  • Independent
  • Working, possibly good income and career-focused
  • Goal-driven (as compared to relationships-driven)
  • In some important aspects, similar to men (ambition, drive, assertiveness, etc. etc.)

Strong women are comfortable with:

  • Speaking up
  • Traveling and going out alone
  • Disagreeing, challenging people on their opinions and decisions

Strong women tend to be more independent, at least in appearances. So from now on, I will be using interchangeably “strong women” and “independent women”.

Submissive & Strong: It’s a Continuum

Of course the two categories are a simplification.

Most women can be submissive or strong depending on the situation and, as well, depending on the man they are with.

And everyone sits on a continuum, not on polar opposites.
The majority of women cluster around the middle so they are either “slightly strong” or “slightly more submissive”.

However, don’t throw out the categories just yes. They are still helpful to understand the differences.

The tough question:

Should you be more submissive?
Or maybe more independent?

Let’s see what the dating gurus say.

The women’s dating advice is heavily split among those who recommend you be an independent woman and those who recommend you to be more submissive (of course they’d never use the word “submissive” though!).

Both camps tend to be rather scornful of each other.
The proponents of the strong woman say that the submissive woman gets played and abandoned.
While the proponents of the more traditional role for women say the strong type is “lonely”.

Be Femine! No, Be Strong!

For example Act Like a Lady, the most popular dating book for women, is in the “be feminine” camp, and it has a chapter called:

Strong, Independent -And Lonely– Women

And Why Men Love Bitches, in the “be strong camp”, is subtitled as:

From Doormat to Dreamgirl

Where doormat is the girl who is “too nice” (and submissive).
Only a few of the best dating resources espouse a happy middle.

Women Recommend Independence, Men Submissiveness

Now here is the other twist:

It’s mostly men who advise more submissiveness.
And it’s mostly women who advise more strength.

Why?
What’s going on there?

In my opinion part of the reason is that women who write dating books have been burned themselves and have a grudge against men.
The same happens in the male’s camp of course, where men schooled in the “Red Pill“, share rather misogynist views and “strategies”.
And this is one of the reasons why I recommend you don’t take relationship advice from dating authors.

But the main reason, is a bit more perverse:

Why Some Women Trick Other Women

Women, just like men, seek to increase their sexual market value.

Don’t take that advice

One way to increase one’s sexual market value is to increase one’s own appeal.

The other one is, guess what? The manipulative way of increasing one’s own appeal is to lower the appeal of other women.

Women suggesting other women to be stronger and more independent are (subconsciously) trying to make other women less competitive and appealing.
And by decreasing the appeal of other women, they automatically increase their own sex appeal.

Does it seem too far-fetched?

Just ask yourself this: have you ever heard a woman telling another woman to be more feminine?
Exactly, me neither.
Albeit, as we shall see, being more feminine is obviously the most competitive position to adopt in the dating marketplace.

So yes, there is much manipulation going on with women telling other women to be strong and independent.

Manipulation: Techniques, Strategies, & Ethics

Why Most  Men Don’t Give Great Advice Either

So does that mean men are right telling women to be more feminine?

Well, partially.

But still, they’re not 100% right.

When men complain about women being too feminist, masculine, or independent, they are often complaining that women are too independent for them.
They take issue with not being able to control their women, but instead of looking in the mirror, they go for the good old finger-pointing.

And of course, men also have an obvious interest in making their dating options larger and more palatable.
By telling women to be more submissive, men seek to increase their own dating options (as well as dating pleasure, since submissive women make for better relationships).

Therefore, I would recommend you always keep that in mind when dating advice comes from women -with the unconscious agenda of making you less appealing- or from men -with the unconscious agenda of making dating easier for themselves-.

Yes, you got it, it’s just another form of cultural manipulation that serves to fight the infinite sexual war.

Sexual Conflict: How Men & Women Fight The Sex War

I don’t think it’s easy or even fair to pick a “winner” between strong women and submissive women.

But if we strictly define “winner” as “having more options”, then it’s clear that submissive women have more dating options.

This is because women prefer relationships with men who are more dominant, and men prefer relationships with women who are more submissive (especially for long term).

Mathematically, then, submissive women naturally have more options.
You can see this in the picture below.

The submissive woman (pink-clad angel on the left) is only at odds with very few super-submissive men. And she can date almost any man (green arrow to her right).
The strong woman is at the opposite end of the spectrum though. The pool of men she’s interested -and who are interested in her- is much, much smaller (only a few of the most dominant men).

Submissive women have far more dating options

This has been proven and confirmed by many pieces of research:

  • Men don’t like women who outsmart them (Park et al, 2015)
  • While women prefer more dominant men, men prefer more submissive women (Wu et al. , 2016)
  • People still feel it’s better for men to earn more (Bertrand, 2013), and men tend to marry lower-earning women

However, there are a few caveats:

#1. Both Extremes Are Unattractive

In some areas, there cannot be “too much of a good thing”.

But as per law of optimum balance, for most things related to humans, there often is such a thing as “too much of a good thing”.

So it’s worth noting that whenever a woman goes too far in each direction, either too independent or too feminine, it’s usually unattractive.

One of the reasons Hillary Clinton lost is because, in an effort to look more dominant, she ended up forgetting to be a woman in far too many instances.

And at the other end of the spectrum, women who overplay the submissive hand, end up being annoying to men as well:

Her: (mature woman acts like a baby caricature who can’t function without a man)

If he hasn’t had sex with her yet, he’ll immediately want to f*ck her. But later, it will become annoying.

I highly recommend this article on dating balance:

Why Balance Is Most Seductive

#2. Men Tend to Prefer Similar Levels of Assertiveness

Men prefer women who are more submissive.

Yet, often, there is a tendency for people to cluster around similarities. And thus, men also tend to prefer women who are not too far off from their level of assertiveness.

#3. Both Types Can Be High-Quality Women

It’s not a question of quality.

Sure, if strong women lose in femininity, then they lose big.
But if they can manage to retain their femininity, then they can be very high quality (also see: how to be strong and feminine).

Feminine AND Powerful: 9 Tips For Women Bosses

And the same is true for submissive women.
You can have both high-quality submissive women and low quality ones.

Does this make sense to you so far?

We covered quite a few topics and this was not the simplest of all articles.

Let’s focus now on the practical applications of this information.

How can you use this information to become an even higher quality gal?
I would say there are three major lessons learned here:

1. Stay Away From Extreme Strawmen

First of all, drop all the strawmen stereotypes.

Most women railing against “too nice girls” and most men railing against “feminists” are screaming at strawmen-types of stereotypes that rarely exist in the real world.

The vast, vast majority of independent women are no family-destroying, man-hating lesbians.
And the vast, vast majority of traditional women are no pushovers who let men take advantage of them (on the contrary, men are often happy to provide for them).

2. For Maximum Appeal, Err On The “Slightly More Submissive”

Generally speaking, men maximize dating effectiveness by being slightly more on the mannish, high-power, dominant, and high-leadership side.

And  women, of course, maximize dating effectiveness by being a bit more on the feminine and submissive side of the spectrum:

3.

Tweak Your Style, Don’t Change it

What you should do depends a lot on where you’re standing right now (and what kind of men you like).

Best of all, in my opinion is to embrace your natural disposition and tweak it if needed.

If you’re too submissive and your man is doing whatever he pleases without respecting you, then some assertiveness training can help.

And if you are too on the strong woman side, you might gain from becoming more feminine and more accommodating.
This is especially true at the far end of the strong spectrum where the attitude is that “I’m not gonna be nobody’s woman“.
That attitude shrinks the dating pool to a puddle.

Also read:

  • Dating for successful women

4. Collaborate With Him, Avoid Power Struggles

If you’re a strong woman, keep this in mind:

If you insist on dating on your terms, you will only end up with submissive men.
That’s OK if it’s OK for you.
But if you meet a man you like, you might want to consider not to get into a struggle for control against him.

This is especially important if you’re a gal who likes dominant men.

Indeed, the three top seducing strategies we reviewed, all use a hint of submissiveness.

5. Do Display Submissiveness to invite Approaches

Evolutionary psychologist David Buss says:

Signs of submissiveness and helplessness lower barriers to approaches. 
Acting submissive elicits approaches from more men, expands the pool of potential mates, creates greater opportunities for choice, and ultimately increases the quality of the mate obtained.

Yes, it’s not just a question of quantity.
Strategic submissiveness can actually increase the quality of mates.

Of course, that’s also more likely to attract men who feel like it’s going to be an easy lay, or that she is going to be easy to control and discard.
So you must be watchful when deploying that strategy.

6. Don’t Bash Or Convert: Adapt

Submissive women don’t mind independent women because they are not as competitive.

It’s from the strong women camp that the flak gets more intense.
Independent women resent more feminine women. And they also resent men who prefer feminine women.
All that flak is mostly out of self-protection. But it’s an attitude that adds no value whatsoever to either you or the world.
It only poisons you and it looks spiteful.

If you’re more on the independent side, avoid calling submissive women “weak” or “pushovers”.
And see if you can learn a couple of things, instead.

Do you know the Bruce Lee quote:

“Be like water my friend”?

Well, women, on average, are very good at being like water and adapting to their environment.
Well, human beings on average are very good at adapting to the prevailing social customs.
However, women even more so.

What does that mean to us?

It means that most women in the west will say, and maybe even actually believe, that they are independent.
And most women in cultures that prize (or force) women into traditional roles, will say they are good, traditional housewives.

This means that you have to look at how they behave, not to what they say.

As a matter of fact, many women who flaunt their independence might as well as try to cover up their lack of confidence and independence, which is a phenomenon called reaction formation in psychology.

This was a bit of a complex topic.

Was it clear enough?

In summary:

  • Submissive women have more dating options (most men go for more submissive)
  • But some men prefer women closer to their dominance level (but not all)
  • Strong/submissive has little to do with overall woman’s quality
  • Discard most general dating advice of “being more independent” or “more submissive”

The strength of a woman is in obedience! III passionate obedience or submissive passion.

Many women melt when a man says, they say, a lady should be weak and defenseless, then I flourish as a gentleman, I want to take care of her and show all sorts of wonderful masculine qualities.

Such wishes deprive a woman of will and reason, just like a pipe from an old Soviet cartoon deprived an elephant of will.

Meanwhile, in front of us is a vivid example of bait. You know, like the luminous appendage on some deep-sea fish that they use to lure prey.

They lure you to eat.

Why does a man need a weak woman?

Here's the truth of life - the mentioned men are not looking for weak women. Men mentioned are looking for submissive women.

This happens because such men, for some reason of their own, know how to either obey or subordinate. For some reason, they do not use the “negotiate” option.

Of course, they do not want to obey, so they choose the remaining option. All this is clothed (not always intentionally) in beautiful words about female weakness.

A submissive woman does not resist, she is obedient and does what she is ordered, she is easily bent. If you do not know how to negotiate and do not want to obey, this is the only suitable option.

Therefore, let's be honest - weak women are not looking for strong men. Powerful men look for weak women. And this is a huge difference - strong is not necessarily powerful, powerful is not necessarily strong. But the powerful necessarily requires obedience.

Care? No, I haven't heard...

Yes, such men say they will care... But words and reality often diverge. They diverge quite a lot.

Women in these cases do not receive care. They get custody.

Caring is different from guardianship. In short, caring is attention to the needs and needs of a person. Guardianship is the maintenance of the life of a disabled person.

And a weak woman is a disabled person. She's also weak.

Simply put, the man will decide for her what to do. He will decide what to wear, where to go, what to read and who to be friends with. On the simple basis that he is strong and she is weak and needs his care.

Don't be fooled - it's not about caring. It's about guardianship.

Women, meanwhile, naively believe that care will be manifested in a different way. Namely: a man will do what pleases her.

No! A man will do what he thinks is right. And if he considers it right to protect you from meetings with girlfriends, then he will do it. And call it care.

Although in fact it will be guardianship, and guardianship is not the most successful.

The Taming of the Shrew

No person can be submissive for long - that's our nature. We need, vitally need freedom of choice (at least within some limits). If we don't have this freedom, we start to rebel.

So the discussed women at some point cease to obey. For example, still meet with friends. Or refuse sex because they don't want it. Or something else.

How will this be assessed? That's right, like obstinacy. And therefore not a weakness. And, of course, as a departure from the correct female behavior.

What should be done in such cases? To tame the obstinate.

And it will be a miracle if taming remains only in words.

Allow me a little emotional digression. I don’t know if you have ever communicated with women who were beaten by their husbands under the motto “There was nothing to argue with!” Psychologists know this. To put it mildly, there is nothing pleasant in such work. Seeing a person beaten by a relative (is it close?) Only for expressing his own opinion is another “pleasure”. Unfortunately, the described men are sincerely sure that they have the right to “teach a shrew” and do not see anything wrong with their actions.

Or, a woman refused to have sex, for which her husband “taught her a lesson”. He did not persuade, did not arouse, did not seduce, did not bribe, at worst. No - learned. Along the way, breaking two ribs and organizing a mild head injury for my beloved (or my beloved?). But he declared that he was all caring and "a woman must be weak so that I can feel like a man." Apparently he felt it.

Who to look for?

Well, if not strong men, then what to look for - weak? To put him on his back and drag him all his life along with his sofa?

No, of course not. Look for men who, if not yet able, then at least strive to negotiate. This is easy to see - such a man does not bend you, for example, during the choice of a movie in a cinema. It doesn't bend under you. He negotiates (or at least tries to negotiate).

Look for men who recognize some autonomy for you (and, of course, recognize the same autonomy for men). In other words, look for men who don't tell you what to do and what to do (and don't tell you yourself, of course).

Look for men who are attentive to your needs and needs, rather than deciding for you whether you drink milk or pedal your bike.

All this, of course, does not guarantee happiness (nothing guarantees it) and does not guarantee unhappiness (similarly), but it still reduces the chances of being subjected to violence, of being "taught".

Total

Don't take my word for it. Know that "a strong man seeks a weak woman" really means "a powerful man seeks a submissive woman." Remember that it is impossible to be always submissive. Keep in mind that you will be punished for disobedience. Understand that these punishments can easily become physical. Look for men who are not powerful, but accommodating. And kill it on the nose - not only a resident of the fortress lives behind a stone wall, but also a prisoner in a dungeon.

Padding around the shape

Let's discuss an interesting question: what is the true strength of a woman? In previous articles, we have already sufficiently discussed many important points regarding the characteristics of female behavior and female character, trying to understand the main thing: how a woman should behave and what she should give up in order to become happy, and to make happy those who whom she loves.

In ancient times, women were treated with special respect and reverence. Men were ready to carry their women in their arms and protect them from the slightest adversity in life. But is a woman really so weak that she absolutely cannot stand up for herself and solve her problems on her own? And is it necessary to patronize a woman like a small child?

In fact, women are not so helpless and defenseless as they seem. Every woman has a special secret power, with the help of which, when she wants, she can gain simply fantastic power over both men and circumstances. Both women themselves and men who have repeatedly experienced the power of female charms are well aware of this female power. But at the same time, women should try not to squander the power given to them by nature, but to save and save it for especially important life events.

What kind of power does a woman have? What is it?

1. A considerable part of a woman's strength lies in her purity and chastity - this has been considered since ancient times.
Moreover, the chastity of a woman is not only to marry a virgin. And above all, to love your husband, to be faithful to him not only in body, but also in soul. A woman who knows for sure: her husband is the best, will never cheat on him and will not destroy his family.

Therefore, a chaste woman is a great find for any man. Such a woman evokes involuntary respect both from her husband and from the people around her, as she is the real guardian of her home and family well-being.

2. Women's strength, however paradoxical it may sound, is also contained in women's obedience.
A wise woman can easily get almost anything she wants from her husband without ultimatums and power struggles. For if a man is pleased with how his woman behaves with him, he himself will try to guess and fulfill any of her desires. He doesn't even have to ask for it!

Showing humility and obedience, a woman voluntarily transfers leadership in relationships to a man, and he has no choice but to start behaving like a man - to take on the solution of basic family problems, to protect and protect her woman, to perform feats for her.

Only next to a submissive woman can a man feel like a real man and fully show all his best masculine qualities. And consequently, a submissive woman, as it were, stimulates a man to various life achievements and accomplishments. And a woman necessarily receives a worthy reward for her humility - everything that a man achieves, he will put at the feet of the one that inspired him to exploits.

3. And the strength of a woman is in her flexibility.
A flexible willow bends under the force of the wind, but does not break, unlike a century-old oak, which does not bend at all, and therefore a strong wind can uproot it. This is how a woman is: bending under her husband and under circumstances, a woman, thanks to this, better adapts to them. Flexibility allows a woman a lot: to maintain peaceful relations in the family, to withstand life's difficulties, to deftly get out of various difficult and confusing situations.

4. A very great strength lies in the peace of a woman.
A pacified woman does not like quarrels and conflicts and is always set on a peaceful solution to any issues. In order for the family to have peace and tranquility, a woman is ready for a lot - to endure, forgive, smooth out sharp corners, act as a peacemaker in case of conflicts between loved ones.

Everyone reaches out to a peaceful woman, runs for help and advice, and just for sympathy - her husband, children, girlfriends, relatives and colleagues. And therefore, such a woman is always and everywhere gladly accepted, appreciated and respected.

5. Female fluidity is an important element of female power.
The nature of a woman is similar to the nature of the water element - it is just as deep and malleable and can also sweep away everything in its path in the event of a storm.

Sometimes simply fantastic forces wake up in a weak woman. And a woman becomes especially strong when something threatens the happiness or health of her loved ones. If a woman's beloved husband or child is in danger, she is able to stop a galloping horse, enter a burning hut, and much more.

When everything is calm in a woman's life, when nothing threatens her near and dear people, she becomes no longer like a raging ocean, but like a quiet, calm, full-flowing river. In principle, calmness and tranquility are the natural everyday state of a woman. Affectionate, gentle, meek and caring, and not like a raging element, her close and dear people prefer to see a woman.

6. “A woman's strength is in her weakness” - this proverb is familiar to all of us.
Just as women like strong men, men tend to be attracted to weak and fragile women. When a man sees a weak, fragile and tender creature in front of him, so in need of his help and protection, his masculine nature wakes up in him - he feels like a real knight, ready to move any mountains for the sake of a beautiful lady. Wise women are aware of such a strong impact on men of female weakness, and skillfully use it.

7. But the main strength of a woman is in her happiness.
When a woman loves and is loved, she literally radiates happiness, just like the sun radiates light and warmth. And with this warmth of her soul, a happy woman warms all the close people who are drawn to her, because in her presence they also begin to feel more joyful and happy. And most importantly: a happy woman, like a magnet, attracts to herself all the best that life can give us - and becomes even happier!

As you can see, the female power, although fundamentally different from the male power, does not become less effective because of this. It's just that the male power is coarser, more obvious, and the female power is imperceptible, subtle and mysterious.

Women and men have different sources of strength. A man needs dumbbells and machines to develop his strength. A woman can feel and reveal her feminine power only if she works on herself and if she unconditionally accepts her weakness, her fragility and her femininity.

A woman striving to become a strong masculine type, relying on her penetrating abilities, hard work and toughness, putting her career and money above her family, will still never be equal to men, but she will irretrievably lose her feminine strength.

Wise women are well aware that going against their nature is sinful and senseless, and therefore they never try to adjust the world around them and their beloved husband with the help of open forceful pressure. But they perfectly know how to use their feminine power and with its help to achieve everything that the soul asks.

Men's and women's strength is different, primarily because men and women themselves are very different from each other. But if a man and a woman were the same, they would not be able to complement each other so harmoniously and form happy and strong couples with each other! A man and a woman are like the polar poles of a magnet, which, the more polar, the more strongly they attract each other.

The strength of a man primarily lies in his masculinity, while the strength of a woman lies in her femininity. Consequently, the more strongly developed in a woman her purely feminine character traits - gentleness, tenderness, compliance, kindness, caring - the more feminine power in this woman.

Unfortunately, in today's society, women are becoming more and more like men, trying to catch up and overtake them in the race for success. But if you take a closer look at these seemingly successful business women, you can see how few truly happy women are among them. And a happy woman can only be when she has a loving husband and healthy, cheerful children who are not deprived of maternal care!

Therefore, dear women, if you really want to be happy, then nothing prevents you from fighting for your happiness and achieving it. But at the same time, it is very important that you try to achieve your happiness by the right methods, using your feminine power, which nature originally endowed you with. Only in this case, the happiness you have achieved can be lasting and lasting! Indents around the form

Men sometimes want to see a woman next to them who will obey them in everything, unquestioningly fulfill any requests and instructions, will not raise a rebellion over trifles, but, on the contrary, will be soft and accommodating. Girls are inherently weaker than men, so they can be easily subdued if done correctly.

How to tame a wife

To make a woman submissive, one must first earn her respect. Everyone in the family only says that the spouse does not respect the opinion of the beloved man and is not ready to perceive him as a leader in the relationship. To achieve the desired result, begin to respect your soulmate yourself, then you will notice responses from her side. All your general problems should be voiced by you directly, and not become subtle hints. If you want your wife to become accommodating, listen to her opinion on certain things as well. This does not mean that you must obey. Just learn to listen to her, then she will reciprocate.

In order for people to respect you and listen to your advice, you yourself must be sure that you are doing the right thing. Don't doubt your decisions. According to psychologists, women obey only those representatives of the stronger sex who are firm in their intentions.

Become a responsible person. Start taking responsibility for your words and actions. If you make a promise to your wife, be sure to keep it. She should not take your words as an empty phrase.

If you want your woman to be submissive, don't make her a slave. Explain to her what you mean by the word "obedience", what actions you expect from your spouse and what the consequences will be for breaking the established rules. Define some boundaries and limits of her obedience.

Women can only submit to those men who deserve it. Become an example for your beloved and show by your actions what kind of actions you expect from her.

Explain to your wife that any request you make is not only to satisfy your own desires, but also for the benefit of the family. The girl must understand that by her obedience she will not fulfill your little whims, but show her trust in you and respect. From such behavior, family ties will only become stronger and more reliable.

In a family, a man should be in charge, any woman wants to feel like behind a stone wall. How can I help my husband become the head of the family?

Instruction

The first thing a woman needs to know is not to take on the responsibilities of a husband. Even if you are sure that you can do better. Leave everything to the man, or he will just get used to the fact that he is not needed, and calmly shift the entire burden on you. You can not kill in a man the desire to take the initiative into his own hands.

Show your spouse that you are dependent on him. Say that you could not have done it yourself and he is doing much better. Men prefer weak and fragile women who require their protection.

Ask your husband for help on your own. It’s hard for a man to guess about your needs, and resentment and quarrels can be avoided if you simply ask a loved one for a favor. Even if the husband often forgets about promises, do not worry, men have so many things to do and thoughts in their heads. He will be grateful to a caring wife who, without unnecessary reproaches, will calmly remind him of the promised deeds.

Be sure to praise your spouse for everything he does, for the slightest success. Do not be afraid to overdo it, a man will want to reach the ideal, as his wife sees. Such regular praise stimulates the desire to do more, to comply. This is a good method to increase a man's self-esteem and give him self-confidence.

Emphasize the headship of the husband especially in public. Tell how he copes well with all matters, solves any family problems. You feel protected, next to a reliable man. You don’t need to discuss your husband’s shortcomings and mistakes with your friends, always show respect, he is the best, just because he is yours, be proud of your choice.

At all times, a man was considered the main one and positioned himself as a conqueror, leader and earner. Historically, the woman was assigned the secondary role of the guardian of the hearth. That is why a woman at all times obeyed a man, which sometimes led to the oppression of her dignity and rights. But, fortunately, in the modern world, equality, with the exception of Islamic countries, and everyone has the same rights and opportunities. But, sometimes, it is very important to know all the subtleties of submission to a man. Let's find out more about them.

Submissive male

As is customary, a man is the head of the family, but now you can find a lot of specimens that are ready to “bend” under a woman. Usually, this happens because a man is weak in character and a woman begins to dominate him, which is not characteristic of her. Very often, such relationships end with the fact that the couple simply breaks up, because a woman, by nature, is weak and needs support, it is hard for her to be a support. If a woman begins to dominate, then by all means she will try to humiliate a man, test her for strength and strength of character. This only leads to quarrels, scandals and rupture.

A man prone to submission will never be able to realize his plans and ideas, so if a woman is a strong person herself and has the temperament of a commander, then henpecked is just right for her. You can educate, manipulate and remake it for yourself or your desires, but, in the end, everything will end in failure, because all women subconsciously want to feel a strong shoulder and a stone back, behind which you can hide from all problems.

Stories of submission to a man

Anna, 34

“When I was 21, I married a man who was from Egypt. Accordingly, it is not worth talking about faith. I didn't have the right to vote, the right to do what I wanted to do. I was scared to even tell him that I wanted to meet my friends. At one time I was a submissive wife: I cooked, fulfilled all whims, but I quickly got tired of it. Feeling like a bird in a cage and obeying every word is very difficult. After 2 years of such a life, I ended up in the hospital with a nervous breakdown, and later there was a divorce.

Margarita, 27 years old

“I met my husband at the age of 18 at the institute. Then he seemed to me just a nice boy, perhaps spineless. But then I became convinced that if you consult with a person, take into account his thoughts, decisions, in some cases yield, then he will answer you in the same way. As a woman, I advise everyone to be a little wiser, it is better to give in somewhere, and by the same to let the man know that he is respected.

Complete submission to a man

If we talk about complete submission to a man, then it is best to ask the women of the East. I know everything about the harsh laws of the Koran for women. For modern girls, these laws seem completely incomprehensible and even slave-owning, but if you talk to many, you can be sure that couples in the East have the strongest marriages. “If a woman respects and obeys a man, then the whole world respects her” - this is a saying from the Koran. Complete submission to a man provides for complete control of actions on his part. Also, in this case, the man himself makes all the decisions, without informing the woman.

This may sound crazy to many, but the fact remains. In any case, each couple has the right to choose their role over each other.

Man and woman - female manipulation: video

Yes, mein damen und herren. Our conversation today is not going to be easy. Please do not go anywhere, ladies especially. By the exit you will be invited additionally. Today we will discuss the problem of sacrifices and sacrifices. Are the altars ready, are the tripods cleaned with bricks, is the firewood prepared for the sacrificial fires, and so on?

If not, men may well start preparing sites for sacrifices and hanging banners: “Woman, sacrifice yourself for the sake of. ..” and “…I consider sacrifice to be the highest female virtue. Capable of this gets, in the end, everything " (extramegasuperperl from one male LiveJournal, I’ll even highlight it in bold).

No, dear ladies, we won't specify: "How much is that?" or “Everything is what?” and “Ultimately, when is that?” Because asking such questions is terribly indecent, unethical, materialistic, and well-bred victims do not behave like that.

And if they lead, they are disobedient. And humility is, so you know, after sacrifice - the highest female dignity. And if you are non-sacrificial and rebellious, then your mother raised you poorly and you will not see happiness forever.

Who said? I said. Lev Margaritych. And do not argue with me here. I'm in charge. If you want happiness, don't dare to argue. Submit your obedience here. So. What did you donate today? How is it - still nothing? Go and immediately sacrifice yourself, and then come to me for happiness. And get everything. But only in the end. After the sacrifice What does it mean - then it is hardly needed? Look, he's still talking. Don't giggle here.

She is funny. There is nothing funny. A woman should be sacrificial - this is her ability, high goal, duty and virtue. And the highest female happiness. And we will reject the opposite statements with indignation. Will object - it is necessary to teach. How to teach? An affectionate suggestion. Does not understand? Hit her from the heart.

Sound familiar? I'm sure many of you are familiar. I already mentioned in one of my texts that the demand from a woman for humility and sacrifice is a sure sign of a man prone to intemperance and assault. A sign of great male insecurity and big complexes, which he is afraid to admit to himself.

So they often find each other - a sacrificial lady who constantly throws the days of her life into the sacrificial fire, and a man who provided her with this very problematic unquenchable "fire on a tripod. " Moreover, the man is not lazy in childish playfulness to shake this tripod with a large amplitude, testing for strength.

Such, for example, are the families of alcoholics. He drinks, well, or while he drinks, she, in the struggle for him, is ready for all sorts of sacrifices. Save by all means. Against desire. By force. This is a very special and complex topic. The secondary benefit of a woman-wife-rescuer of a chronic alcoholic is quite large - this is a departure from self-realization, this is a feeling of one's own great significance and generosity, almost holiness, and unwillingness to realize one's own personal problems, and the eternal Russian woman-pitiful sacrificial solo - "children's need-father". But is it okay that an alcoholic irresponsible father often has psychotic, unhealthy, intimidated and beaten children? But all this needs to be written separately.

And now we are busy with a simpler topic - the sacrifice and humility of a woman in everyday life, without alcohol extremes . .. And I want to ask here, dear comrades, gentlemen, monsieurs, misters and herrs. Why, then, is a humble obedient altar needed? Or, worse, just a victim as a companion? Is it really possible to be proud of such a woman? Mein Gott, it's so disgusting - an eternally sacrificial and submissive creature nearby. Like a dog, he looks into your eyes.

“Yes, dear, you are right, dear, I stroked you, washed you, cooked you, brought you out of a hangover, gave birth to children. What education, dear? You didn't and you don't have to. You are the king here. The main thing is childbearing and humility. I've been standing with a fan in lace underwear for an hour now. No, dear, I don't understand. And I don't understand this either. You're so clever. Yes, she got fat. As you say. Of course you're stupid, dear. Of course, a rag, dear. No, I didn't even look at Vasya. Why, darling, I love you so much. Is this really an unattainable dream of today's Russian man? No, it can't be. I don't believe in such horror. A nightmare, and nothing more.

I asked several Western men about submissive and sacrificial women. Ordinary, calm, educated, working. They did not even fully understand what a sacrificial woman is. I had to unravel. And all the same, this concept did not fit in their heads. Kind - yes. Proud - yes. Responsive - yes. A good mother, of course. But sacrificial? Vanzinn, madness. And what, the Russians need victims? Rave.

One said: I don't need a crutch woman. And a submissive little dog is also not needed - why is this, what kind of stupidity? Pity-sufferer? Why do I need your crazy Sonya Marmeladova? I am not going to film Dostoevsky in my family. I need a female friend. An honest partner for life. Equal in rights, not stupid, calm and pretty. I am deeply uninterested in a woman without her own interests. And a woman without pride and self-esteem is completely uninteresting.

This does not mean, of course, that there are no men in Europe who love female submissiveness. But usually these men are either poor or overly complex, mentally unbalanced and deeply problematic, they marry ladies of very, very low requirements, taking them from somewhere in Southeast Asia - and often from Russia, to be honest. This causes a lot of problems.

I will add that very many male aggressors, with whom I had a chance to talk by the will of fate, answered the question “What do you value most in women” - humility.

And to you, dear ladies, I will tell you: if you heard from your gentleman that he appreciates humility and sacrifice, beware. Immediately - ears on top. The desire to see a sacrificial and submissive woman nearby is a very alarming and disturbing moment, promising very great difficulties in relationships.

Well, that's all for today. Extinguish already, Monsieur, this stupid sacrificial fire. Shatter the tripod. Stop demanding sacrifice, sacrifice and obedience from Madame. You're not some kind of Moloch, are you?

10 feminine qualities that hold the world together

It is pointless to try to imagine a world without women: it is clear that it will end very quickly. But the question is - is it only because the birth of new people is impossible without us? Is not a fact. The threat of extinction is a good reason to finally allow cloning. But would anyone want to live in a world devoid of truly feminine qualities? Hardly. Because he rests on them.

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Mercy

It seems to us that there is nothing surprising in the fact that women feel sorry for all the unfortunate: sick children, lonely old people and abandoned animals. It's because we don't think about the fact that men usually don't. But what is really surprising is that women feel sorry for men. If it were not for this pity, men on average would not die 10-15 years earlier than women, but all 25. Imagine a world where men who have already begun to kill themselves are left without women: no one feeds, no courtesy and no one tries cure addicts, so alcoholics and drug addicts disappear instantly. No one cares about the "risk guys": he flew into a pole on a motorcycle and was crippled - crawl yourself somehow. No one supports the unemployed "in search of themselves." And no one, of course, devotes his life to a genius: if you are so smart, you will cook your own porridge. Not enough resources for both work and self-service? Your problems. Lie down and die, who cares?

Patience

A typical day of a young mother looks the same, no matter what conditions this mother lives in and what she does besides caring for her baby. In any case, she must repeat the same action hundreds of times a day: feed, wash, pick up. The child gets older, there are more actions, but one thing remains the same: they still need to be repeated 100 times a day. Every day. And if you deprive the world of female patience, no cloning will help: little people are not able to survive if there is no person nearby who is ready to endlessly protect them from all dangers, small people are not able to develop normally if there is no person nearby who is ready to show them a million times how to hold a spoon, for example.

Flexibility

Women are able to adapt to any situation - in the event that changing the situation is impossible. At the same time, a woman never uses flexibility only for her own benefit: even if she has not created her own family, she has relatives and friends, and men will certainly be among them. Men who survive on women. Simply because a woman will quickly adapt to the changed world.

Endurance

If a man falls ill, he lies down on the sofa to die. If a woman gets sick, she goes to the doctor and gets tested. Early in the morning. Immediately after he feeds the children breakfast and sends them to school or kindergarten, and before he goes to work. Perhaps nothing more needs to be explained here.

Tenderness

No lyrics, solid physiology: touch is the first sense that develops in an embryo, and the only sense that a newborn's body is able to perceive correctly. All mammals caress newborn babies, all mammals then caress each other to express feelings. People are the same animals, and despite the fact that our verbal communication is well developed, we all need tactile communication as well. The more often we are hugged, the more secure we feel. But this, in fact, is not all: the more often we hug, the stronger our immunity is, the better the nervous and endocrine systems work.

Empathy

Empathy is the ability to consciously empathize with the emotional state of another person. Any state. For a number of reasons, empathy is better developed in women, and without this feminine quality, humanity would not have survived to this day. Because any action that we perform in relation to another person gives rise to an emotion in him. What would happen if no one empathized with someone else's grief, someone else's fear, someone else's pain? Obviously, no one would have survived. There is an opinion that there are almost no serial killers among women precisely because they are more empathic: empathy with the feelings of a hypothetical victim simply does not allow us to do the irreparable.

Romanticism

It may seem that romance is of no practical use, but it is not so at all. The fact is that the concept of "romance" is teeming with stereotypes: rose petals, kisses at sunset, breakfast in bed - that's it. In fact, romantic relationships primarily involve a bright, overt expression of tenderness and warmth. A world devoid of romance is a world in which, in fact, there is no love either. Relationships are just living together, sex is just mechanical movements. It is doubtful that there are those who want to exchange the existing world order for something similar.

Emotionality

We have already talked about empathy, which is characteristic of the vast majority of the world's population, but women to a greater extent. Men, however, are not deprived of it either. The problem is that it is more difficult for them to express emotions, but experiences driven deep lead to serious problems, up to death due to early heart attacks. What about female emotionality? Moreover, if a woman does not hide her feelings, a man who is nearby joins this wave and ceases to restrain his own emotions. Roughly speaking, periodically throwing scandals at your sweetheart is useful. Not only for you, but also for him. Because there are very few opportunities for men to let off steam without killing anyone. But, since the days of duels are over, all that remains for them is to join our emotional background and thereby devastate and restore their own.

Faith

This is not only and not so much about religion, especially since women became the highest religious ranks only during pagan times, while monotheistic religions do not allow women into the ranks of the highest clergy. But the matter, in fact, is not only in faith in God, but in faith as such. Despite the fact that women's thinking is in no way inferior to men's in terms of rationality, we are able to sincerely believe in a miracle. It doesn’t matter how we reinforce this faith, the important thing is that we can become a support for loved ones in difficult times. You can draw from the vessel of female faith endlessly simply because it is truly bottomless.

Maternal instinct

Instinct, without which, in principle, the existence of mankind would be impossible.


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