Introvert book npr
Unleashing 'The Power Of Introverts' : NPR
Heard on All Things Considered
Introverts, who prefer quieter, lower-stimulation environments, have trouble thriving in today's extrovert-oriented culture, says author Susan Cain. iStockphoto.com hide caption
From Gandhi to Joe DiMaggio to Mother Teresa to Bill Gates, introverts have done a lot of good work in the world. But being quiet, introverted or shy was sometimes looked at as a problem to overcome.
In the 1940s and '50s the message to most Americans was: Don't be shy. And in today's era of reality television, Twitter and widespread self-promotion, it seems that cultural mandate is in overdrive.
Susan Cain — who considers herself an introvert — has written a new book that tells the story of how introversion fell out of style. She talks with NPR's Audie Cornish about Quiet: the Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking.
On the difference between introversion and shyness
"Introversion is really about having a preference for lower stimulation environments. So it's just a preference for quiet, for less noise, for less action. Whereas extroverts really crave more stimulation in order to feel at their best. ...
"Many people believe that introversion is about being antisocial, and that's really a misperception. Because actually it's just that introverts are differently social. So they would prefer to have a glass of wine with a close friend as opposed to going to a loud party full of strangers.
"Now, shyness, on the other hand, is about a fear of negative social judgment. So you can be introverted without having that particular fear at all, and you can be shy but also be an extrovert."
On the culture of character vs. the culture of personality
"To some extent, we've always had an admiration for extroversion in our culture. But the extrovert ideal really came to play at the turn of the 20th century when we had the rise of big business. Suddenly, people were flocking to the cities, and they were needing to prove themselves in big corporations, at job interviews and on sales calls. ...
"We moved from what cultural historians call a culture of character to a culture of personality. During the culture of character, what was important was the good deeds that you performed when nobody was looking. Abraham Lincoln is the embodiment of the culture of character, and people celebrated him back then for being a man who did not offend by superiority. But at the turn of the century, when we moved into this culture of personality, suddenly what was admired was to be magnetic and charismatic.
"At the same time, we suddenly had the rise of movies and movie stars. Movie stars, of course, were the embodiment of what it meant to be a charismatic figure. So, part of people's fascination with these movie stars was for what they could learn from them and bring with them to their own jobs."
On how today's workplaces are designed for extroverts
"It's quite a problem in the workplace today, because we have a workplace that is increasingly set up for maximum group interaction. More and more of our offices are set up as open-plan offices where there are no walls and there's very little privacy. ... The average amount of space per employee actually shrunk from 500 square feet in the 1970s to 200 square feet today.
"Introverts are much less often groomed for leadership positions, even though there's really fascinating research out recently from Adam Grant at [The Wharton School of business at the University of Pennsylvania] finding that introverted leaders often deliver better outcomes when their employees are more proactive. They're more likely to let those employees run with their ideas, whereas an extroverted leader might, almost unwittingly, be more dominant and be putting their own stamp on things, and so those good ideas never come to the fore."
Before becoming a writer, Susan Cain practiced corporate law for seven years and then worked as a negotiations consultant. Aaron Fedor/Courtesy Random House hide caption
Aaron Fedor/Courtesy Random House
Before becoming a writer, Susan Cain practiced corporate law for seven years and then worked as a negotiations consultant.
Aaron Fedor/Courtesy Random House
'The Rise of the New Groupthink'
On the value of working alone
"None of this is to say that it would be a good thing to get rid of teamwork and get rid of group work altogether. It's more just to say that we're at a point in our culture, and in our workplace culture, where we've gotten too lopsided. We tend to believe that all creativity and all productivity comes from the group, when in fact, there really is a benefit to solitude and to being able to go off and focus and put your head down."
On whether extroverts should be offended by 'Quiet'
"My criticism in the book is not of extroverts at all, but rather of the extrovert ideal. I actually find extroversion to be a really appealing personality style. ... Many of my best friends truly are extroverts, including my beloved husband."
Quiet Quiz: Are You an Introvert or an Extrovert?
Excerpted from: Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
To ﬁnd out where you fall on the introvert-extrovert spectrum, answer each question True or False, choosing the one that applies to you more often than not.
1. ______ I prefer one-on-one conversations to group activities.
2. ______ I often prefer to express myself in writing.
3. ______ I enjoy solitude.
4. ______ I seem to care about wealth, fame, and status less than my peers.
5. ______ I dislike small talk, but I enjoy talking in depth about topics that matter to me.
6. ______ People tell me that I'm a good listener.
7. ______ I'm not a big risk-taker.
8. ______ I enjoy work that allows me to "dive in" with few interruptions.
9. ______ I like to celebrate birthdays on a small scale, with only one or two close friends or family members.
10. ______ People describe me as "soft-spoken" or "mellow."
11. ______ I prefer not to show or discuss my work with others until it's ﬁnished.
12. ______ I dislike conflict.
13. ______ I do my best work on my own.
14. ______I tend to think before I speak.
15.______ I feel drained after being out and about, even if I've enjoyed myself.
16. ______I often let calls go through to voice mail.
17. ______If you had to choose, I'd prefer a weekend with absolutely nothing to do to one with too many things scheduled.
18. ______ I don't enjoy multitasking.
19. ______ I can concentrate easily
20. ______ In classroom situations, I prefer lectures to seminars.
The more often you answered True, the more introverted you are. This is an informal quiz, not a scientifically validated personality test. The questions were formulated based on characteristics of introversion often accepted by contemporary researchers.
From Quiet by Susan Cain. Copyright 2012 by Susan Cain. Excerpted by permission of The Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House Inc.
The glorious complexity of being human : NPR
MANOUSH ZOMORODI, HOST:
On the show today, We Contain Multitudes, which can refer to the various ways we identify ourselves, and also to how we see the world. Personality and perspective - it's something that psychologists have been trying to understand for decades.
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CARL JUNG: Of course, that is the introvert. And that's - the introvert is always afraid of the external world.
ZOMORODI: Back in 1910, for example, the Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung introduced the concepts of introversion and extroversion.
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JUNG: ...In general, particularly America - it's extroverted like hell. The introvert has no place because he doesn't know that he beholds the world from within.
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ZOMORODI: And the world latched on to these binary terms, taking them to mean that we each fit into one of these two boxes. Either you are an introvert or an extrovert. But that's not what Jung intended.
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JUNG: There is no such thing as a pure extrovert or a pure introvert. Those are only terms to designate a certain penchant, a certain tendency - for instance, the tendency to. ..
ZOMORODI: So why do we do this? Why do we find comfort in labeling ourselves?
SUSAN CAIN: It's such a difficult thing because as humans, you know, we naturally kind of sort people into categories and types, just a way - as a way of making sense of the whoosh of information coming at us.
ZOMORODI: This is author Susan Cain. She's best known for her 2012 book "Quiet: The Power Of Introverts In A World That Can't Stop Talking." It offered a modern analysis of Carl Jung's ideas.
CAIN: "Quiet" was a book that looked at the bias that we have in our culture in favor of a very kind of extroverted self-presentation and the way in which that is a colossal waste of talent and energy and happiness for the a third to a half of the population who are actually introverts.
ZOMORODI: So you explore this idea that two conflicting labels or emotions can both be true in your new book, which is called, "Bittersweet: How Sorrow And Longing Make Us Whole."
CAIN: Yeah. So what bittersweetness is is it's this deep recognition of the way in which joy and sorrow in this life are forever paired, and that everything and everybody we love most will not be here forever, but that what comes with this deep recognition of these truths - there comes a kind of piercing joy at the beauty of the world and a kind of gateway to creativity and to human connection, like the sense of us all being humans together who are all in this sort of strange situation together, and then occasional moments of transcendence.
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ZOMORODI: I mean, to me, it's very similar to "Quiet" in that you're saying you are not one thing or the other. You are not introverted or extroverted. You are a mix. You are not experiencing just sadness or just happiness, that there is so much nuance to the human experience and to each of us, who we are. We contain multitudes.
CAIN: Yes. Exactly. We contain multitudes. And the problem that we have had in our current situation is that we're not supposed to contain those multitudes. You know, there's a very strong message that's delivered to all of us that we should be perpetually smiling. And if that's not how we feel, we should act as if we feel that way. And we should only express the most optimistic points of view and really only talk about kind of that side of our emotional ledgers. And my argument here is that there's no human who feels that way all the time, number one. And so when we're not telling each other the truth, then we can't truly be connecting with ourselves and with each other.
ZOMORODI: You spend the book exploring this idea of experiencing these two things at once - longing, sorrow - and the beauty and creativity, even, that that can spark. But I wonder if you could talk a little bit about this paradox of tragedy, as the philosophers refer to it, you write, and what they've been puzzling over for centuries.
CAIN: Yeah. So the paradox of tragedy is the question of why it would be that we listen to sad music. Why do we watch movies that make us cry? Why is there a tradition of tragic drama, where you actually get yourself out of your home and go to watch performed on a stage very difficult and tragic events? Why would we do that? And I, in particular, had been puzzling over my extreme, intense, positive reaction to sad music that I have felt all my life. I dedicated this book to Leonard Cohen, who I love beyond all reason...
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LEONARD COHEN: (Singing) On what has passed away...
CAIN: ...You know, and have always experienced when I would listen to that kind of music a kind of sense of uplift and joy and love and connection, you know, and not sadness at all.
(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "ANTHEM")
COHEN: (Singing) Ring the bells that still can ring.
ZOMORODI: Here's Susan Cain on the TED stage.
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CAIN: Why do we sometimes welcome sorrow when the rest of the time we will quite naturally do anything we can to avoid it? There's actually a scholarly debate raging over this question. But I have come to believe that, really, what we are craving at bottom is that state of longing, that joy that's laced with sorrow, which is often triggered when we experience something so exquisite that it seems to come to us from some other world. And this is why we give painters and rock stars such exalted status - because they're the ones who bring us the breath of magic from that other place. Except it only lasts a moment. And we really want to live there for good 'cause we know that we live in a deeply flawed world, and we have this stubborn conviction that we come from a perfect and beautiful one that remains forever out of reach.
And maybe that sounds depressing to you, but this state of mind, this longing, is actually the deep source of all our moonshots and our loves. It's because of longing that we play "Moonlight Sonatas" and build rockets to Mars. And it's because we're all in this same strange state of exile that we have the capacity to empathize with each other in the first place.
ZOMORODI: You trace it back to the ancient Greek and Plato, who called it pathos. Is that the same as empathy? Is that what that is? It's a deep empathy for the humanity, the eternal struggle?
CAIN: Yeah. One of the really cool things is that this longing impulse that we were just talking about - you see it expressed across time and across cultures. So, for example, with the ancient Greeks, that meant the longing for everything that is most good, most beautiful, most true and that is fundamentally unattainable, and yet we long for it. But the lesson that's embedded there is that the very act of longing for it is what brings you a little closer to that for which you long. And so, for example, in Homer's "Odyssey," the whole epic adventure starts with Odysseus weeping on a beach out of homesickness because he's longing for home. Like, that's the fundamental human state of - is longing for home. And it's understood that he's been away from his home for 17 years, and it's the longing to return there that propels him on the adventure in the first place.
ZOMORODI: I mean, as you - when you put it that way, like - and once you talk about it, you start to see it everywhere - in movies and music and books and arts. And yet, we're in this sort of denial about accepting the sadness with the joy. What - is that an American thing? Is that a cultural thing?
CAIN: Yeah. I mean, there's definitely a cultural variation, you know? And there are studies, for example, that look at the difference in smiling among different cultures. And, like, in the U.S., people smile way more than they do in others. And there are certain countries in which people would view excessive smiling as either, you know, foolish, like you must really not know what's. ..
CAIN: ...Out there if you're smiling that much (laughter)...
CAIN: ...Or insincere and dishonest, you know...
CAIN: ...Because, again, if you're smiling that much, you're not telling the truth about what you truly feel. So there's definitely a lot of variation there. And in this country, in the U.S., a lot of it can be traced to the rise of business culture in the 19th century. You started to have this language of winners and losers. And you can trace the rise of the word loser, you know, to the point that even in the Great Depression, there were newspaper headlines when somebody would lose their fortune and kill themselves on the street, and the headline would be, loser kills himself on the street.
And it's like, if we truly see people and ourselves in that - with that kind of a false dichotomy, then you want to do everything that you can to not have the emotional affect of a loser. So you don't want to engage with loss. You don't want to talk about it. You don't want to express the emotions associated with it. You want to show that you're - like, that everything's going well for you. You're cheerful. You're optimistic. You're forward leaning - all of those things. And you end up getting a very flat emotional landscape.
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ZOMORODI: These labels of winner and loser, all these labels - they bring us back to our theme, this idea that we are all so much more nuanced than we often give ourselves credit for.
CAIN: Yeah. I think that is so true. And I'll tell you, it's also something I have really struggled with in terms of how to talk about questions like introversion and extroversion, you know, and being bittersweet because on the one hand, I do believe that these tendencies or these orientations or whatever word we want to use for them - they are meaningful, and they do explain some of the amazing variety of differences between humans. And at the same time, as you say - like, I mean, humans are gloriously complicated, and we contain these multitudes. And so how do you make sense of that? And I guess I just keep coming back to the idea of holding two truths at the same time - you know, that there are differences in temperament. There are differences in ways of being. There are outlooks. There are sensibilities that we all have that make us who we are and distinguish us from each other in these really wonderful and fascinating ways. And we're not ever all one thing.
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ZOMORODI: That's author Susan Cain. Her book is called "Bittersweet: How Sorrow And Longing Make Us Whole". And you can see all of her talks at ted.com. On the show today, We Contain Multitudes. I'm Manoush Zomorodi, and you're listening to the TED RADIO HOUR from NPR.
NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.
The Atlantic: night owls - The Idealist
While most people are strong sleeping, some ultra-introverts go about their business, enjoying the silence and loneliness. In this way they challenge the basic assumption psychology: all people need social connections.
Author: Faith Hill
Imagine that now night. You crawl under the covers and turn off the light. Maybe you hear beeps cars on the street, or voices from the other side of your apartment wall, or your snoring partner nearby; maybe everything is quiet. It may even seem that the whole world falls asleep with you.
But in this dark night, while most people are fast asleep, there is a whole world of people who are awake. They are go to work, drive a car, run errands around the clock stores. In this parallel universe, there are rarely crowds, traffic jams, queues; no awkward shuffling around other shoppers in the grocery aisle, no collisions with neighbors or a cacophony of email notifications. FROM At sunrise, these nocturnal inhabitants go to bed.
Not all of them want to live this way. Some of them are simply forced: they have sleep disorders or work the night shift. But some people crave it - so much so that they take night shifts, train themselves to wake up in the dark. They do it out of love for social isolation, not in spite of it. I talked to people who gave me a magical picture of their night world: exquisite, deep loneliness, relief, escape.
According to most psychologists, people are by nature social beings; communication with others is not just a desire, but a need. Deprived of it, people tend to deteriorate in physical and mental health. But those I've talked to say they don't need much communication at all. "I was trying to work a day job, but I couldn't handle waking up early, rushing, and most importantly... being around people all the time" , says Chris Hengen, a 26-year-old security guard living in Spokane Valley, State Washington. "I don't have any bitterness towards people, it's just tiring." John Young, a 41-year-old network engineer who lives in Hammonton, New Jersey, said he is "more than happy" to lead a rather secluded life. Young has been working night shifts since late 1990s; he prefers nighttime rest, but this preference is sometimes mistaken for social anxiety or depression. In fact, he told me, he's an introvert and that's just what he likes. And many others I spoke to felt the same way.
However, I understand why people may wonder if an almost complete withdrawal from daytime society might not be motivated by something more than just introversion. When desire seclusion turns into something unhealthy? If we believe the night dwellers on word that they just like to live this way, they will confuse one of our basic assumptions about human psychology: that all people have the same fundamental needs.
Social interaction with ancient people looked very different than today. Until about 12,000 years ago connections were mostly limited to relatively small groups of extended hunting and gathering families. When agriculture developed, more large populations began to settle together, but interaction with strangers was still quite limited. However, over time these communities became bigger and more difficult. This growth accelerated during the industrial revolution, when a large number of people poured into the cities to work on factories, coming into closer contact than ever.
In his book Bowling Alone political scientist Robert Putnam has argued that this urban boom initially caused the rise of social ties. But, in his opinion, in the late 1960s and early 70s these ties began to fray as urban sprawl and new technologies led to the fact that people began to spend more time alone, watch TV or drive a car. In 2017 former and future surgeon general USA Vivek Merthy warned of a dangerous "epidemic of loneliness". As he wrote in the article Harvard Business Review, “Through my years of working with patients myself the most common pathology I saw was not heart disease or diabetes, but loneliness. In recent years, commentators have blamed loneliness for wide range of social ills, including high suicide rates and opioid crisis. American culture of the twenty-first century is now often associated with deep isolation.
At the same time, much of modern life still involves being surrounded by other people, whether you like it or not. From a very early age, children are shoved into schools where they spend all day with their peers. The people I spoke to told me that they had always resisted this forced socialization. Daniel Herman, who lives in Orland Park, Illinois and has been a night shift machine operator since the late 1980s, told me that growing up he always wanted to be alone, though he didn't understand why he felt that way. After leaving school, he began to drink more and more frequently; in social situations, it seemed to him that this allowed him to communicate like everyone else. But he didn't like feeling so addicted to alcohol. " While other people were just getting drunk, I became normal” (now he does not drink, according to the man, the nightlife makes it easier to fight addiction, because he does not need to drink to communicate).
Growing up gives a certain freedom to retire (at least you can live alone if you want and can afford it), but adulthood usually involves meeting other people - queues at the bank, collision with people in the park, exchange courtesy with the person next to you. At work, you are expected to be constantly you will be “in touch”: chatting with a roommate, making small talk during lunch time, speak at meetings.
Roxana Alexandru, life coach for an introvert, felt that her previous office job was very stressful. “I hid from people in meeting rooms,” she told me. "It was the worst thing is to sit next to people and listen to them talk all day.” Now she works remotely and regularly gets up at 4am to work and to enjoy the silence before her children wake up around 6. Although it is exhausting her, she says that she needs to use that period of time when the people around her sleep when she can catch her breath and concentrate; after how she helps her kids with morning chores, she takes two or three hours of sleep to try and make up for the lack of sleep.
You might think that modern life makes loneliness easier. The Internet allows you to do a lot of things and tasks at a distance, and social networks allow you to communicate in some limited form without having to endure a crowded bus or a long conversation. But these same technological conveniences can encroach on a sense of true loneliness. “It’s repulsive to be so connected and feel literally in a crowd, even if you’re alone in the room,” says Anneli Rufus, author of Party for One: A Singles Manifesto (she’s not nocturnal, although she used to fantasize about it). ). While the world of the internet never truly quiets down, night time can seem quieter - most people in your time zone are sleeping, not texting, replying, or expecting to chat. Even if it doesn't make sense, the nocturnal lifestyle may seem like an act of rebellion against the practice of being constantly connected. As Rufus points out, you are making a statement, however symbolic.0003 "I'm going to live in the forest" .
Many of those with whom I talked, felt trapped in modern life - overwhelmed, tense and guilty that they feel this way at all. But then each of them came to understand: it is not necessary to feel this way. Already the time has come when the noise and chaos of society recedes. You just need to wake up this time.
However, to stay awake for this is not always simple. Ideal sleep hours vary from person to person, but most people naturally follow a similar circadian rhythm and wake up during daylight Times of Day. Disruption of this internal clock can harm your health and lead to an increased risk of developing type 2 diabetes, heart diseases, gastrointestinal disorders and cancer. Some people with whom I talked, they told me that sometimes they have problems with falling asleep, and they I had to specially accustom myself to a nocturnal lifestyle: they must sleep disciplined during the day, use blackout curtains, or noise cancelers and put all your devices on silent. But that's all It can also be hard on the body.
Night owls account for face logistical obstacles. Find Convenience Stores can be difficult - many people have described relief when they walked through an empty grocery store - but when they close or reduce opening hours, it becomes a hit. And some establishments, including most doctor's offices, never work at night, except for emergency cases; this means that night people usually have no other choice, except to visit them instead of sleeping.
Some see the inconvenience and health risks as an acceptable price to pay for a lifestyle that they say has made them immeasurably happier. "There is a feeling of timelessness, as if you are floating freely in the abyss" . The night gives you freedom - from expectations, from obligations and distractions. It allows you to simply be. “During the day, all these identity possibilities are thrust upon you,” Rufus continues. "Night, with its silence, darkness and loneliness, helps to better understand who you really are."
But I didn't know how to relate these comments to the many studies showing that humans are inherently social beings. The neocortex, the part of the brain necessary for developing social skills, is much larger in humans than in other primates, which many researchers believe is a natural response to the social complexity of our society. Neurologists have shown that our brains perceive social rejection and physical pain in the same way. Researcher Matthew Lieberman has found that the neural networks involved in reading other people's emotions are active nearly all the time when we are awake. “This is what our brains were designed to do: reach out to and interact with others.” he writes in his book The Social: Why Our Brains Are Built to Interact. And social isolation has a profound effect on the body, down to the molecular level.
Considering all this, some psychologists with whom I spoke were skeptical that the night life in isolation will be healthy in most cases. They are emphasized that it is impossible to judge from a distance, but Lee Anna Clark, professor University of Notre Dame, who studies personality pathology, gave me a general outline of how how experts perceive maladaptive behavior. In a broad sense, they consider two separate factors: does it help the person practicing similar behavior, and whether it harms someone else. Such isolation can be adaptive for some people, but there are many ways how it can go wrong so.
There is already debate in the psychological community about whether intense introversion should be classified as a disorder. The American Psychiatric Association is considering including introversion in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Pathologizing introversion sounds absurd until you start looking at the extremes of the spectrum. Colin DeYoung, a psychologist at the University of Minnesota, declined to comment on the debate, but clarified that the clinical version of introversion is known as "withdrawal," which is characterized in part by low sensitivity to reward. This means detachment from social relationships, as well as from "energetic or upbeat positive emotions, such as joy or excitement" , he told me. Clark noted the same thing. “There is a link between social interaction and pleasure. Therefore, people who live alone, without other people, cannot be unhappy. But they also may not experience the full spectrum of pleasure without even realizing it.
I talked to seven people who adhered to the night schedule to varying degrees. Some of them sometimes saw friends or talked on the phone, although, according to them, they could only endure a small amount of communication, after which they again needed to be alone. Some of them were married to people not leading a nocturnal lifestyle; Herman, for example, sees his wife when their schedules match, but he spends most of his time at home alone, watching sports shows on TV or rides a stationary bike while she sleeping. (She is also an introvert, he told me, and their marriage worked because they can function well independently of each other).
Others were real loners, lived alone and kept mostly to themselves. Alec Maltz, The 38-year-old Los Angeles resident who has been a nocturnal look for years life, told me that he thought he could live "indefinitely" without seeing people. (Recently he had to return to his day job, "and it knocked me down. Too many people and too light during the day,” he wrote. me by email). Some people have told me they've lost touch with old friends and do not regret it. One even said he gave up possible romantic relationships in favor of the nocturnal lifestyle. Everyone I'm with talked, felt deep gratitude for the night's respite.
For some day people, orbiting introverts, it's hard. Young said that his family meets regularly, but he visits them only occasionally, and when he does, then leaves early. Alexandra's husband, Willem, told me that he had to get used to to the fact that they will not always share all parts of their lives. When she goes to bed at 8 or 9 p.m. to wake up at 4, "that means we don’t go to bed together… It’s not very nice,” he said. Or you wake up and your partner is not around.” But mostly, according to them, the members their families understood that their introverted loved ones had different needs and wanted to to make them happy. Willem told me that his wife taught him to be more reflective and calm about silence, and he does not consider that partners should share all aspects of their lives.
The nocturnal people I interacted with said that self-acceptance gave them great comfort. "I can't try to fight this anymore." Herman told me. " I don't try to force myself to do what I don't want" . However, research shows that character traits are not necessarily set in stone. When introverts are forced to behave like extroverts—for example, pretending to be more talkative and assertive or interacting with strangers—they tend to report feeling positive emotions afterwards. I asked some of these night people: Maybe you will end up better if you communicate more? Most of them were skeptical that they would become happier, and some had already tried and felt exhausted by the forced communication. But some said they couldn't be sure, or admitted that sometimes they thought it would be nice to have company. Maltz said he was interested in having a romantic partner, someone who "wants to go about his business alone in a separate room" . Herman told me that sometimes he likes to communicate with colleagues at work.
However, Sanna Balsari-Palsul, researcher at the Center for Social and Behavioral Change at Ashoka University in Haryana, India, noted that we must be careful and not to draw too big conclusions from research that pushes introverts to communicate. They show a mood boost after people come into contact with other people for a relatively short period time; it's not at all obvious that introverts will be happier in the long run. perspective, if they start behaving like extroverts forever. Some researchers theorize that it is beneficial for people to behave in accordance with their personal features.
In fact, Balsari-Palsul suggested that nocturnal people could be highly functional. "If they're able to get the equivalent of what we think of as social interaction in other forms, whether it's using social media. .. or even just watching movies where you feel like you're interacting with people in some way," she told me, “I don’t think this will necessarily lead to maladjustment” .
If such people are happy, it raises some serious questions about how much social interaction necessary for people by nature, or whether people have universal psychological needs in general. For decades, many psychologists believed that all people have certain basic needs, the degree of which varies. In Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, first described in 1943, the only needs more important than "social" are needs related to physical survival and security. And in in recent years, researchers have proposed updated versions; for example, theory basic psychological needs claims that we have an innate the need for "kinship" - the feeling that you are important to other people.
But trying to establish links between people and cultures, to describe what unites us despite our countless differences, researchers may have glossed over the differences even in these most elementary features. Some social needs are likely universal up to a certain age; Babies need to connect with caregivers, eye contact, touch and warmth. But for adults needs may be less specific. “I think that there are people with such unusually low level of this need, that for them it is practically not exists,” DeYoung, a psychologist at the University of Minnesota, told me. "We should take seriously the possibility that there are people who really don't need social connections. Perhaps psychologists generally miss such people: if they are left alone - if they are not even awake at the same hours as and the rest - we may not notice their presence.
Although the desire to find some universal traits is a good intention, it can also be a sign pride. After all, we can only know our own inner experience, but we still want to project it onto others in order to feel that their consciousness reflects our own. Of course, sometimes there are good reasons consider other people's behavior "abnormal" and ask them to change. Question in where the line is drawn - when the way of life or thinking of another person can be recognized as wrong, and by whom.
The answers people give to this questions are inevitably shaped by invisible prejudices. IN THE USA lonely nightlife may seem more mind-blowing than in others countries. On the one hand, this is an individualistic culture, it would seem, designed for people who want to build their lives the way they want. FROM on the other hand, it is well known that America is a nation oriented towards extroverts. Ever since Carl Jung described the term extraversion in the popular book 1921 years old, he has become associated in the US with "self-improvement, independence and the "American dream", according to Fay Bound Alberti, historian emotions and the author of the book "Biography of Loneliness". Introversion, meanwhile, associated with loneliness.
All this does not mean that social connections are not important. But perhaps we shouldn't be so sure that connection means the same thing for everyone, or that there is one way live a full life. In the last decade or so, there has been growing acceptance of various identities, including a thriving movement for neurodiversity. Traditionally, this movement focuses on neurological differences, but some argue that it should include not only brain, but also the psyche. Most people probably wouldn't think of defending night people under the same banner or in the same spirit. But maybe we should do.
The pandemic can also change our understanding of individual psychological needs. Never before it wasn't so clear that people could work well on completely different schedules. Balsari-Palsoul believes that jobs can play a huge role in whether introverts will be pressured by extroverts. Now they may pave the way for greater acceptance of night people and introverts in general.
Night owls with whom I talked, count on it. When I asked them what they want from future, many of them described a similar vision of even deeper isolation, even further away from the noise and unrest of other people. Yang, a network engineer, told me that he "wants to become more of an introvert... considering moving into a tiny house in the backwoods".
And Herman, a machinist who has been nocturnal for more than 30 years, dreams of the time when he can leave the night shift, his only remaining link to society. “I see myself living on a small ranch somewhere in Montana where there is no one around. This is my dream of retirement” , he told me. "Peace, silence and darkness" .
Original: The Atlantic
Alone with Text on Apple Podcasts
"Alone with Text" is an author's podcast about and for those who write.
Who is this podcast for?
If your professional life is related to texts, you need to write business letters, news, articles, describe vacancies, blog or interview, we are waiting for you. We will talk about how to write more, more often, and most importantly - better!
A few words about me.
My name is Varvara Shubina. Behind my shoulders is a long work in PR and the release of a corporate IT publication.
Lyrics are my passion, so I decided to start a podcast to explore this topic in more depth and share my discoveries with the world.
Issue 11 - Galina Seregina "I do not create competitors for myself, I grow new hands"
Issue 11 — Galina Seregina “I do not create competitors for myself, I grow new hands”
The heroine of the podcast Galina Seregina is the creator and leader of the school of perceptual technologies, the author of her own method of healing.
From the podcast you will learn:
• How a PR specialist can start his own school of healing and succeed.
• Why any technology that works well is indistinguishable from magic.
• What is the transformation of the Master.
• How the Japanese sword helps develop sensitivity.
• What the Buddha said about enlightenment.
Galina Seregina School of Perceptual Technologies https://galinaseregina.ru/
• Facebook https://www.facebook.com/galina.seregina
• VK https://vk.com/galinaseregina
• Instagram: perceptioschool
0:30 – what is perception
1:46 – what it allows you to feel
3:48 – how our body gives away our emotions
4:44 – how Galya turned from a PR specialist into a master of perception
6:24 – a person as a three-part system
8:28 – about divine energy
8:50 – about the teacher
10:00 – were there any doubts about the chosen path
11:42 – how to change profession correctly
12:09 – can anyone become a specialist in perception
13:27 – when we encountering perception in our lives
15:11 – how to open perception in yourself and how meditation helps
16:47 – about competition
17:53 – is there a selection for students
18:30 – why practice is a prerequisite for teaching perceptual technologies
19:12 – how it was formed school of perceptual technologies by Galina Seregina
21:00 – how a mother of many children can save on medicines
21:54 – should a healer take money
23:26 – is there legislation in the field of healing in Russia
24:40 – how to properly build communications with target audience
26:24 - two different groups of students, what are their differences
28:13 - what is the transformation of a master
28:51 - about the seminar on PR in the context of perceptual technologies
29:48 - why people are afraid to talk about themselves
30: 38 – taboo in communications
31:29 – features of promoting the topic of healing
33:01 – why it is important to get internal consent from the patient
34:09 – how things are with haters
35:58 – why every businessman needs a perceptual friend
36: 19– how to deal with objections
37:17 – what the Buddha said about enlightenment
37:35 – what Eastern disciplines allow you to develop perception
38:08 – how martial arts are related to healing
39:54 – plans for the future
40:45 – about the new studio and open day
Issue 10 - Mikhail Bode "Editors are a generic word that unites very different professions"
Issue 10 - Mikhail Bode "Editors is a generic word that unites very different professions"
Podcast hero Mikhail Bode is a media manager, editor, journalist, creator of the Gzom project and TextExpress.
From the podcast you will learn:
• What is useful procrastination and how to integrate it into your work schedule.
• How good is the concept of limited resources.
• What are communication texts and what are their specifics.
• Who are UX copywriters.
• How to write on Habr so that you are read.
0:47 - the beginning of a professional journey.
2:50 - acquaintance with Maxim Spiridonov.
3:32 - the most interesting project - SeoPult.TV
4:56 - the work of a ghostwriter.
5:20 - how to tame procrastination.
7:08 - how to calculate the optimal time to complete a project.
8:24 - how to effectively schedule a work schedule.
9:48 - what to do when the energy is at zero.
10:44 - what is useful procrastination.
12:37 - the healing power of routine.
13.59 - work on time periods.
14:42 - the concept of limited resources.
16:00 - about the TextExpress project.
17:00 - what are communication texts.
18:15 - how the niche was chosen.
19:05 - features of creating communication texts.
20:30 - why companies turn to agencies.
21:42 - client portrait.
22:47 - who are UX copywriters.
24:41 - where to start a company that decides to start a blog on Habré.
26:07 - why personal experience comes in best.
26:42 - why you should be friends with the developers.
28:02 - is it worth ordering materials from third-party authors for Habr.
29:38 - tips for a beginner. How to become a successful freelancer.
31:24 - types of editors.
34:18 - do not forget about literacy.
35:49 about the Gzom project.
36:36 - which is correct - "bitcoin" or "bitcoin"?
38:44 - why you should read fiction.
39:39 - books that should be on the shelf of any editor.
Books everyone should read:
To the Editor: A Spelling Guide. Rosenthal
To Man: The Bible
Service for ordering communication texts TextExpress http://textexpress. ru
Project on editing, text and Gzom language https://gzom.ru
Article dedicated to this topic "Bitcoins" https://gzom.ru/kak-nado/perekuyom-bitkoiny-na-bitkojny
Issue 9 - Anastasia Ryzhina "I feel like Henry Ford"
Issue 9 — Anastasia Ryzhina “I feel like Henry Ford”
The heroine of the podcast Anastasia Ryzhina is a designer, writer, minimalist, author of the methodology and book Digital Minimalism.
From the podcast you will learn:
• What is digital minimalism.
• How to make gadgets become a source of inspiration, not time killers.
• Is it possible to write a book in 5 minutes a day.
• How to drop everything and go to the sea to finish a book.
• About a big dream and a difficult path to success.
Facebook: https://www. facebook.com/anastasia.ryzhina
00:27 - why digital minimalism.
03:28 - why Nastya feels like Henry Ford.
04:47 - what is digital minimalism.
06:25 – about corporate courses and Maxim Dorofeev.
08:16 – how digital minimalism can help a manager.
08:30 - how to become less addicted to gadgets.
13:45 - about social media addiction.
14:54 - why clean social media.
16:08 – how to drop everything and go to Sochi to finish a book.
18:10 - which is better Selfquest or Texture.
19:38 - how the work on the book went.
20:46 - three life hacks for working on a non-fiction book.
25:35 - how to write a book that is fun.
26:55 - where to find time for a book.
27:59 - work according to plan or wait for inspiration.
30:09 - is it possible to write a book in 5 minutes a day.
32:34 - why beta readers are needed.
33:38 - big dream.
34:51 - is it difficult to promote a niche that doesn't exist yet.
35:55 about promotion tools.
37:32 - tips for a beginner on how to write a book with no experience.
A book worth reading for everyone:
Maxim Dorofeev "Jedi Techniques".
If you enjoyed the podcast, please share and like it on social media. It is important for me to know your opinion.
Issue 8 - Larisa Parfentyeva "Texts can change a person's life"
Issue 8 — Larisa Parfentyeva "Texts can change a person's life"
The heroine of the podcast Larisa Parfentyeva is the author of two bestselling books "100 Ways to Change Life", the author and creator of the courses "Texture", "Selfquest", "Mig 21" and "Ultimator" ”, journalist, blogger, inspirer and just a beautiful woman.
From the podcast you will learn:
• How to take a leap of faith, change your life and cope with the resistance of the environment.
• About the tragedy of early success, about Spanish shame or empathic shame.
• How to turn a neurosis into a business.
• How a job you hate and a toxic relationship are similar.
• Recipe for cool text from Larisa Parfentieva.
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/larisa.parfentieva
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/larisa_parfentieva
• VK: https://vk.com/lars_parfenter
02:00 - how to take a leap of faith
03:37 - how not having money can help
04:28 - how to decide to change your life if your environment is resistant to change
06:20 - two options for change: optimal and radical
07:00 — how the ideas of training courses were born
09:00 — about the process of maturation of an idea
11:00 — what requests most often come to Larisa’s courses
13:30 — what to do if you don’t love your husband more
14:00 - what is the similarity between a job and a toxic relationship
15:33 - about the success of the Texturists
18:10 - about a new personality and a new book
21:48 - about the tragedy of early success
23:41 - how to accept your dark side and learn how not to avoid conflicts
28:14 — how to stop being afraid of public speaking and pump extraversion
30:15 — how to find out who you are: an extrovert or introvert
30:33 — how an interview is like sex
31:55 — recovery techniques strength and energy
33:49 — cool text recipe from Larisa Parfentyeva
37:30 — about Larisa’s new project “Texture Club”
40:20 — why it’s important to bring writing people together
42:13 — about Spanish shame or empathic shame
43:31 — where Larisa gets ideas for posts and how she works with content
45:44 — why a dull pencil is better than a sharp memory
46:59 — tips for a beginner on why it is worth learning to write.
50:38 — why Leo Tolstoy didn’t like Anna Karenina
51:45 — is it possible to make money with texts
54:28 — why learn to accept criticism
A book that everyone should read
• “The Brothers Karamazov” by Fyodor Dostoevsky
• “Willpower” by Kelly McGonigal
Do you want to receive a gift from Larisa Parfentyeva and boost your brain
Issue 7 - Elena Baudouin "I am the repository of other people's secrets"
Issue 7 - Helena Baudouin "I am the repository of other people's secrets"
The heroine of the podcast, Elena Baudouin, is a special correspondent for Komsomolskaya Pravda. Elena's specialization is the stars of show business, cinema and theater.
Learn from the podcast:
• How Captain Columbo helps interviews.
• Why an interview with a star is like skydiving.
• How to make a great interview in 10 minutes.
• Why a journalist should look good and not be a snob.
• And also about Ivan Okhlobystin, Yuri Shevchuk, Danny Boyle, Johnny Depp, Justin Timberlake and others.
00:33 - professional path.
03:20 - when Elena was entrusted with the stars.
04:40 – can a journalist choose with whom to do stories.
05:40 - about Ivan Okhlobystin.
08:10 - how to make cool stuff out of a 10 minute interview.
09:02 - interview with Danny Boyle.
10:52 - what went wrong with Jude Law.
11:20 - how to overcome the communication barrier.
13:26 - why it's easier to work with western stars.
14:52 - how to properly prepare for an interview.
19:39 - about the reception of Captain Colombo.
21:08 - how to look in an interview.
22:06 - why image is part of the job.
23:49 - elements of a strong interview.
25:10 - why you should never humiliate yourself.
25:30 - how not to be afraid of star status.
27:57 - about the horror and panic of the interviewer.
30:36 - career advice for a beginner.
32:10 - why you can't be a snob.
32:56 - Facebook is the main weapon of a journalist.
34:34 - why read the articles of colleagues.
34:58 - how to find a balance between work and personal life.
36:31 - why you shouldn't be Charles Augustus Milverton.
38:01 - about personal choice and profession.
39:37 - why you shouldn't be afraid to be funny.
40:01 - sources of inspiration.
42:10 - whether the reader influences the content of the publication.
43:09 - are there any restrictions on the choice of heroes in the CP.
45:00 - which of the stars Elena wants to interview.
47:11 - about pain and pleasure.
48:33 - why doing interviews with friends is harder.
A book everyone should read:
William Indick “Psychology for screenwriters. Building conflict in the plot.
Friends, if you liked the release, please share the link with your friends, write a comment or like it. Thank you for your attention.
Issue 6 - Ana Mavricheva "Only personality is for sale"
Issue 6 - Ana Mavricheva "Only personality is for sale"
The heroine of the podcast, Ana Mavricheva, is the Head of Sports Communications at the Higher School of Economics in cooperation with FIFA, a specialist in personal branding and publicity, a Forbes columnist, and the author of the book “Publicity Code. Personal Branding in the Digital Age.
From the podcast you will learn:
• Why it's more important to be beautiful than smart.
• Is it worth it to go into the book business.
• Perfect balance of personal and professional content.
• Why love haters.
• How many people actually think about personal development.
00:40 – professional path
01:40 – does an unusual name help in life
04:35 – why “feed” the haters
05:20 – is it worth going into the book business in Russia
07:00 – how Grifel will change
09:15 – why does a manager need a personal brand
11:00 – which brand costs more than Gref or Sberbank0107 11:50 – what books sell best
14:10 – about the red wardrobe
16:35 – why do you need a cheeky avatar
18:05 – what is the “Publicity Code” about
19:30 – who should read the book
21: 20 - why Russia is an ideal place for promotion
22:20 - why the book appeared right now
25:05 - how the work on the book was built
27:10 - about the pains of creativity
30:05 - competition or cooperation?
30:15 - what is the feature of the Digital era
32:50 - what is the place in the promotion of the text
34:30 - the right balance of personal and professional content
38:50 - how to make your life interesting
40:50 - tips for beginners on how to start promoting
47: 30 - how much time to spend on Instagram
48:44 - about social detox
49:55 – should you be afraid of haters
53:46 – when it's time for a successful person to think about a book
A book that everyone should read:
• "100 ways to change your life" Larisa Parfentyeva.