How to help depersonalization

How to Stop Depersonalization: 10 Methods

Do you frequently feel detached from reality, like you’re watching yourself in a movie? If so, you may want to know how to feel some relief from depersonalization.

Depersonalization can be a frightening or confusing experience. The good news is, learning what causes depersonalization, as well as using a few self-care tools, can help make it more manageable.

Depersonalization is a complex topic, and researchers still don’t know a lot about it. What they do know is that it’s a type of dissociation, often caused by traumatic or stressful events like a panic attack, an accident, abuse, or assault. Sometimes, depersonalization is caused by a negative experience with cannabis or other substances.

Additional symptoms of depersonalization can include memory loss and out-of-body experiences. In addition, anxiety or depression can often occur alongside depersonalization, which can make your experience more intense.

If you’ve experienced any of these symptoms, you’re not alone. Various types of support may help ease your distress around depersonalization — from self-care and online groups, to therapy and education. With that in mind, here are several resources that you may find helpful.

About 75% of people experience feelings of depersonalization at some point in their lives. For 2% of the population, the symptoms become more frequent. This can result in a diagnosis of depersonalization/derealization disorder (DPDR).

Dissociation can also occur with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and borderline personality disorder (BPD), so you may not necessarily be diagnosed with DPDR separately.

Many theorists believe that dissociation is your body’s way of protecting you from extreme trauma or stress. Others assert that it’s less of a protective function and more like a scar from the traumatic event (or set of events) itself.

While depersonalization symptoms can interfere with your quality of life, managing the distress caused by them is possible. It’s important to work with a mental health professional who’s able to support you with the best treatment plan for your symptoms.

Many tools can help you manage feelings of anxiety, depression, or distress about living with depersonalization. Treatments for PTSD and BPD may also have a beneficial effect on depersonalization symptoms.

First things first: When symptoms arise, try to remind yourself that you’re OK and that you’re safe. Naming your feelings, practicing deep breathing, or listening to music can also help you feel calmer. In addition, challenging your intrusive thoughts and reaching out to close friends may help you feel grounded.

1. Acknowledge your feelings

According to many psychology researchers, depersonalization may be an adaptive way to cope with stress. Some believe that it’s your brain’s way of protecting you from danger. When your body and mind distance you from intense emotional pain, overwhelming feelings may decrease, which may help you feel safe at that moment.

If your body and mind ignore your feelings for too long, symptoms of depersonalization may drag on. In these cases, your brain misreads danger, and feelings of depersonalization increase.

When this happens, you might try to name your feelings. Some research suggests that by acknowledging certain emotions (in this case, fatigue), you can lessen stress. It’s possible that this concept may work on other painful emotions as well. In turn, this may decrease symptoms of derealization, though more research is obviously needed.

Self-compassion exercises may help you accept whatever feelings arise at that moment.

2. Take deep breaths

When stress arises, your body’s nervous system fires up. For people living with depersonalization disorder, this can disrupt brain functioning and lead to feelings of depersonalization.

Breathing exercises, like taking deep belly breaths, may help against this stress.

If you want some guidance from a meditation teacher, consider downloading a mindfulness app or look for a free guided meditation on YouTube or TikTok. If deep breathing is helpful, you might consider practicing your exercises for a few minutes each day. Like exercise, deep breathing can become easier with practice.

3. Listen to music

Feelings of derealization can be more intense when your brain focuses on them. A grounding technique, like listening to music, may help you feel less anxious about the experience.

Research shows that music can help reduce cortisol levels, a stress hormone, in your system.

You might consider making a playlist of your favorite songs and keep the playlist on your phone. When symptoms arise, even if you’re at work or waiting for the bus, you can pop in your earbuds, press play, and let the music soothe you.

4. Read a book

If you enjoy reading, it may help with depression and the anxious thoughts that often occur alongside depersonalization. Try picking up an old favorite book, or a story that brings you comfort. You might find that you’re able to concentrate on the words and their meanings enough to quiet intrusive thoughts.

5. Challenge your intrusive thoughts

For some, depersonalization involves a lack of intrusive thoughts. For others who live with depersonalization as well as anxiety or PTSD, intrusive thoughts can pose a real challenge.

Cognitive psychologists point out that a tool called psychological distancing can help quiet intrusive thoughts. Psychological distancing means finding some space between the upsetting thoughts and painful emotions.

Taking a few deep breaths can help quiet intrusive thoughts. As odd as it might sound, talking to yourself out loud can also help. You might ask yourself, “What evidence do I have that my worry is real?”

Basically, when your mind focuses on something else, intrusive thoughts often go away.

6. Call a friend

When you’re anxious and symptoms of depersonalization arise, you might be tempted to isolate. But at times like these, talking to a trusted friend or family member can really help.

Opening up can make you feel vulnerable. But talking gives you a chance to receive empathy from someone who cares about you. If you’re not sure who to lean on, try to identify two or three loved ones that you can text or keep on speed dial, no matter what.

Self-care tools can help relieve symptoms of depersonalization. In addition, psychotherapy, education, nutrition, and exercise can help you maintain a sense of well-being in the long run.

7. Talk therapy

If your symptoms of depersonalization are caused by a stressful or traumatic experience, talking with a therapist may really help.

Several types of therapy can work. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can teach you to challenge intrusive thoughts and manage symptoms of depersonalization. Trauma-focused therapy like eye-movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy (EMDR) can help you process traumatic memories.

Once your trauma heals, symptoms of depersonalization may lessen.

8. Education

Learning more about the symptoms and causes of depersonalization disorder can also help. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) has resources and information. Finding out how depersonalization affects your brain can make symptoms less frightening. In addition, reading about other people’s experiences is one way to feel less alone.

9. Sleep

Going to bed when your body feels tired can help you manage stress and decrease anxiety. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommends going to bed and waking up at the same time each day.

If you’d like to improve your sleep, you might also consider banning your phone and other electronics from your bedroom. If possible, try to keep your sleep space as dark as you can. Darkness helps regulate the body’s circadian rhythms, which can improve the quality of your sleep.

10. Exercise

Like getting enough rest, exercise can also help you manage stress. One study found that aerobic exercise can help decrease burnout, and one symptom of burnout is depersonalization.

If you’re interested in exercise but aren’t sure what to choose, walking could be a good option. Walking can help lower your body’s cortisol, which can help decrease stress.

If you’re living with depersonalization disorder, finding the right type of support can be an essential part of self-care.

If you’d like to find a mental health professional, the American Psychiatric Association (APA) has a searchable database that can help you find a therapist. If you’re looking for a local support group, you might contact your local National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI) chapter.

If you’d like to read about other people’s experiences with depersonalization, you can check out the NAMI blog post, “The Scariest Panic Symptoms People Don’t Talk About,” which is one person’s story about living with depersonalization disorder. You can find other blog posts here and here.

If you’re interested in checking out some mental health podcasts, The Anxiety Podcast seeks to support anyone struggling with anxiety, stress, and panic attacks. The Spin Cycle is another mental health podcast that features interviews with mental health professionals.

Maybe you’re ready to check out meditation, but you aren’t sure where to start. Meditation Minis is a podcast that includes several types of guided meditations. And if you’re on Clubhouse, meditation teacher Lisa Abramson leads mindfulness classes every day.

Finally, know that taking care of your mental health takes courage! Sure, it can feel frustrating at times, and that’s OK. No one expects you to be perfect. With more mental health resources and tools available, living with depersonalization disorder is much easier.

How to Stop Depersonalization: 10 Methods

Do you frequently feel detached from reality, like you’re watching yourself in a movie? If so, you may want to know how to feel some relief from depersonalization.

Depersonalization can be a frightening or confusing experience. The good news is, learning what causes depersonalization, as well as using a few self-care tools, can help make it more manageable.

Dissociation can also occur with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and borderline personality disorder (BPD), so you may not necessarily be diagnosed with DPDR separately.

1. Acknowledge your feelings

If your body and mind ignore your feelings for too long, symptoms of depersonalization may drag on. In these cases, your brain misreads danger, and feelings of depersonalization increase.

Self-compassion exercises may help you accept whatever feelings arise at that moment.

2. Take deep breaths

When stress arises, your body’s nervous system fires up. For people living with depersonalization disorder, this can disrupt brain functioning and lead to feelings of depersonalization.

Breathing exercises, like taking deep belly breaths, may help against this stress.

3. Listen to music

Feelings of derealization can be more intense when your brain focuses on them. A grounding technique, like listening to music, may help you feel less anxious about the experience.

Research shows that music can help reduce cortisol levels, a stress hormone, in your system.

4. Read a book

5. Challenge your intrusive thoughts

For some, depersonalization involves a lack of intrusive thoughts. For others who live with depersonalization as well as anxiety or PTSD, intrusive thoughts can pose a real challenge.

Basically, when your mind focuses on something else, intrusive thoughts often go away.

6. Call a friend

When you’re anxious and symptoms of depersonalization arise, you might be tempted to isolate. But at times like these, talking to a trusted friend or family member can really help.

Self-care tools can help relieve symptoms of depersonalization. In addition, psychotherapy, education, nutrition, and exercise can help you maintain a sense of well-being in the long run.

7. Talk therapy

If your symptoms of depersonalization are caused by a stressful or traumatic experience, talking with a therapist may really help.

Once your trauma heals, symptoms of depersonalization may lessen.

8. Education

9. Sleep

10. Exercise

Like getting enough rest, exercise can also help you manage stress. One study found that aerobic exercise can help decrease burnout, and one symptom of burnout is depersonalization.

If you’re interested in exercise but aren’t sure what to choose, walking could be a good option. Walking can help lower your body’s cortisol, which can help decrease stress.

If you’re living with depersonalization disorder, finding the right type of support can be an essential part of self-care.

How to get rid of derealization and depersonalization

If you encounter symptoms of "haze" or "veil" in your head, feelings of unreality of both what is happening around you and your own "I". If you feel that your emotions seem to have become more faded and blunted, that you have lost emotional connection with what usually gives you joy, then this article is for you.

In it I will tell you how to get rid of derealization and depersonalization , explain what it is and list symptoms . I will not advise taking pills, as they do not eliminate the cause of this ailment. I will tell you about safe, effective and natural ways to solve this problem for good.

This article is based both on the advice of Western psychologists (I must admit that in our country the methods of working with derealization are poorly developed), and on personal experience of getting rid of derealization.

Some time ago, as a result of severe stress, I experienced panic attacks and anxiety. The most annoying thing about this was that the sudden attacks of fear, panic and constant anxiety were accompanied by other symptoms. One of them was a feeling of "haze", "fog" in the head, a feeling of some kind of "isolation" from the outside world and from one's own emotions. nine0003

At first I thought it was some kind of serious mental illness. When these symptoms appeared, I became very worried, unable to get rid of restless thoughts about my condition. Then it got even worse. Even when there was no derealization, I was still afraid: “What if this feeling comes back? Is this a symptom of insanity?

But now I recall my worries with calm humor. All this is long in the past. Now I am in a state of deep and strong connection with my feelings and the outside world. I see the world clearly. I do not feel that life is passing somewhere away from me. I feel like I'm alive. nine0003

Here I am going to share with you effective derealization and depersonalization techniques that helped me get out of this state.

By the way, subscribe to my Instagram at the link below. Regular useful posts about self-development, meditation, psychology and getting rid of anxiety and panic attacks.

Follow the instructions on Instagram

Symptoms of derealization and depersonalization

What is derealization and how does it differ from depersonalization? In short, derealization is a feeling of the unreality of what is happening around (or a certain “isolation”, “remoteness” from external events), and depersonalization is a feeling of the unreality of what is happening inside. nine0003

Derealization (as well as depersonalization) in most cases is not an independent disorder. Most often, it is simply one of the symptoms of panic disorder (panic attacks) and/or anxiety disorder. However, if you experience these symptoms, it's always best to see a doctor just in case, to be 100% sure that your derealization is due to anxiety and not something else!

Symptoms of derealization

Feeling of "haze" or "veil" in the head
Feeling as if signals from the outside world are reaching us late
The state of an "observer" torn off from external reality, who perceives this reality as a film
Ordinary things (beautiful scenery, favorite people or objects, entertainment) do not evoke an emotional response
The state in which we live this life as if in a dream

Symptoms of depersonalization

Feeling of "fading", "dullness" of one's own emotions and experiences
Feeling that both our body and our emotions seem foreign to us
Feeling of unreality ("blurring" "uncertainty") of one's own self

Accompanying symptom for both conditions

Anxiety and anxiety about the state of derealization/depersonalization

In principle, these statuses accompany each other. Moreover, many researchers do not distinguish between them at all. One way or another, when we are aware of the external world, we still “filter” information about it through the prism of our internal perception, which is also aware of the internal world. In other words, a person does not have two separate types of perception for external and internal reality. Perception is one. nine0003

And if this perception is “disturbed” (I used this word in quotation marks so that you don’t be afraid: derealization is a safe symptom, but more on that below), then this “disturbance” will inevitably extend to both the sensation of external phenomena and internal .

I described this principle not for abstract philosophizing, but to formulate a practical conclusion:

Methods and principles that will allow you to get rid of derealization will also eliminate depersonalization and vice versa. These two deeply interconnected phenomena do not require two different “treatment” schemes (again, I use quotation marks, because I believe that there is no disease: derealization is a protective mechanism of the psyche; more on that below). nine0003

And in this article, when I write "derealization", I will have in mind both the symptoms of derealization itself and the symptoms of depersonalization.

Why do derealization and depersonalization occur?

This problem is not yet fully understood. Therefore, it is impossible to answer this question with certainty. However, there are scientific theories that try to explain this phenomenon.

Personally, I am a supporter of the theory that derealization is a defense mechanism of our psyche. The whole irony of such an illness as panic attacks lies in the fact that those symptoms that people consider dangerous for their lives, in fact, are designed to save this life in the event of a mortal threat. I'm talking about symptoms of rapid heartbeat, rapid breathing, feelings of fear and panic (which are triggered by adrenaline rushes). As I described in the article, the symptoms of a panic attack are all defense mechanisms of our body. nine0003

And derealization is also the same protective function.

One Western study found that on average 50% of people who have experienced a traumatic event experience symptoms of derealization. Surely you have heard stories of people who got into dangerous, stressful situations and described their experience as: “It seemed to me that this was not happening to me”, “It was like it was in a dream.”

These are the symptoms of derealization. In moments of stressful events, our psyche, as it were, "closes" from potentially traumatic experiences. And so it seems to us that what is happening is like a dream, that this is not happening to us. And here we can draw the following conclusion:0003

Derealization and depersonalization are not dangerous in and of themselves. These are simply defense mechanisms of our psyche, which seeks to "close" itself from unpleasant experiences.

And you can get rid of this state. I'll tell you how next.

How to get rid of derealization and depersonalization

First advice – get out of the vicious circle of anxiety

afraid of the harm that derealization can cause them. nine0003

First, let me remind you that this condition is not dangerous. Secondly, as we remember, it is very often just one of the symptoms of anxiety. What does it mean? This means that when you start worrying about the symptoms of derealization, you provoke new attacks of anxiety or panic, which in turn increase the derealization!

So relax and try to let go of thoughts about your condition. If derealization has come, then it has come. You are already in “this boat”, so there is no point in worrying and winding yourself up. Relax and try to accept this state. Do not oppose or resist him. It is temporary. Just as it came, it will go. nine0003

You should strive for this, although it is difficult. In people with chronic anxiety, the mind is so anxious that it tends to worry constantly about everything. And when there is no reason, the mind finds it. And at first, it is very difficult to break this established habit and help yourself to relax and stop worrying. However, it is possible. The following tips will partly deal with this problem.

Second advice - develop concentration

Psychologists give the following advice. nine0003

If you love to read, then you probably have a plan for what books to read in the future. (And if you don't, it's time to start) Personally, I have a lot of books in my plan that are not very exciting, maybe even boring, but, nevertheless, I think that I need to read them. It can be books on history, science, or even fiction, serious, deep, but not exciting. Read such books.

Try to keep your attention on the text (which will "slip" because the text is not interesting) and return it every time you get distracted. This, firstly, will develop your concentration and certain parts of the brain, and secondly, it will allow you to be closer to the area of \u200b\u200bexperiences. After all, books, after all, stimulate your emotions, give rise to images in your imagination, helping you to be closer to yourself. nine0003

Advice Three - Develop Mindfulness and Sensitivity

In many of my articles, offering to solve various emotional and personal advice, I give advice: "meditate. " So I'm not going to surprise you with originality and give similar advice. No, wait. There is one nuance here.

The more articles I write, the more I work with people who suffer from anxiety and depression, and the more I get feedback from them, the more I want to stop using the term "meditation". nine0003

Not only because it (undeservedly) smacks of something mysterious and mystical. With the development of scientific research on meditation, the world is increasingly aware that meditation is not magic, not a religion, but a completely applied exercise.

The reason why I want to drop this term more and more is the following. When I say "meditation" people often take it as an end in itself. It seems to them that simply sitting in a motionless position will solve all their problems by itself. Therefore, I decided to write more about “techniques for developing awareness, attention, concentration.” From this formulation it becomes clear that meditation is not an end in itself, but only a tool and means for something more. nine0003

Western psychologists agree that mindfulness helps in getting rid of derealization. The first reason this happens is because the state of consciousness that mindfulness practices induce is the opposite of what a person feels during derealization. During derealization, our attention is “scattered”, is in some kind of half-sleep haze, it is not able to clearly and clearly grasp the object, the object of attention becomes unclear, as if blurred, and our emotions and experiences seem to be at a distance from ourselves. nine0003

But during mindfulness practices, on the contrary, we sharpen our attention so that it is aware of the object more clearly, as if we are focusing the lens of our lens, adding clarity to the picture of the world. We also try to become aware of our sensations directly, becoming closer to them.

What actually needs to be done? Your practice will consist of two parts.

"Informal" meditation

Practice mindfulness throughout the day. Try to pay more attention to your immediate feelings. You can do this, for example, while eating. Instead of thinking about other things, "moving away" from your feelings, concentrate on the taste of food in your mouth, on the sensations of how it passes through the esophagus and into the stomach. nine0003

How do you feel in your mouth? Sweetness, bitterness? Heat or cold? What is the taste of food? What do you feel in your stomach? Heaviness or lightness? Warm or cold? Just be with your feelings here and now. Get closer to the realm of direct experience. As soon as your thoughts are distracted from the here and now, bring them back.

The same principle applies to other daily activities: washing dishes, cleaning, exercising, any physical labor, walking. For at least a small part of your day, try not to let your mind wander. Try to be here and now with what your senses are aware of: tastes, smells, colors and colors, tactile sensations, sounds. In this way, you will sharpen and train your attention, returning yourself to a clear and direct perception of life. nine0003

Formal practice:

Formal meditation is the same sitting meditation during which you try to concentrate on one object, such as breathing. There is no magic here. Meditation is a trainer for your attention, your awareness, your self-control, your sensitivity to sensations.

When you meditate, you focus your attention on an object, as if sharpening your focus. Thanks to this, your feelings, experiences become more clear, emotions become more alive and brighter. This, again, is the opposite of derealization, the consequence of which is that emotions are dulled and faded. nine0003

There is a stereotype that meditation is needed to get rid of emotions, to become indifferent. This is not true. The purpose of mindfulness practice is to teach you how to control, accept and let go of your emotions, manage your mind instead of being its pawn. And practice just the same leads to the fact that, as a result of the development of awareness and attention, we begin to perceive life more vividly and richly, in deeper and more distinct colors.

But the meaning of meditation is not only to eliminate derealization as a symptom. Practice will help to cope with the cause of derealization: anxiety, depression, traumatic experiences. nine0003

I wrote above that many people have such a restless mind that it is very difficult for them to relax, to control themselves during anxiety attacks. As soon as emotions and disturbing thoughts appear, they immediately take over such a person, dragging him deeper and deeper into a pool of panic and anxiety.

Meditation allows you to calm the mind, curb anxiety, let go of obsessive thoughts. And gradually, step by step, move towards complete deliverance from panic, fear and anxiety. You can learn how to meditate by reading the article on how to meditate correctly. nine0003

For people who are experiencing symptoms of derealization, I will give the following advice regarding meditation. As an object of concentration, choose the sensations during breathing that arise in the region of the nostrils. Why? Because the sensations there are very subtle and sometimes barely noticeable. This means that in order to feel them, you will need to “sharpen” your own attention, as it were, to focus the lens of your internal lens. This will increase your sensitivity to your own feelings. After I gave this advice to one of the participants in my DON'T PANIC course who was suffering from derealization, she wrote:

As I wrote above, derealization is a consequence of other problems. When your anxiety passes, then the derealization will also disappear. Therefore, I advise you to focus your efforts not on combating a particular symptom, but on solving the general problem of anxiety.

Watch my video and subscribe to my channel.

References:

Trueman, David. Anxiety and depersonalization and derealization experiences. Psychological reports 54.1 (1984): 91-96. Cassano, Giovanni B., et al. nine0003

Derealization and panic attacks: a clinical evaluation on 150 patients with panic disorder/agoraphobia. Comprehensive Psychiatry 30.1 (1989): 5-12.

(calmclinic.com/anxiety/symptoms/derealization)

American Psychiatric Association (2004) Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders DSM-IV-TR (Text Revision). American Psychiatric Association. ISBN 0-89042-024-6.

Sierra-Siegert M, David AS (December 2007). "Depersonalization and individualism: the effect of culture on symptom profiles in panic disorder". J. Nerv. Ment. Dis. nineteen5(12): 989–95. doi:10.1097/NMD.0b013e31815c19f7. PMID 18091192.

(en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derealization)

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Created in Ridero intellectual publishing system

Chapter 1 "My story"

I'm 22, I'm from Ryazan, the most ordinary guy who was drawn to new sensations. Not so long ago, out of my own stupidity, I tried LSD. During the action of the drug, I was covered with a panic attack, my mind was captured by incredible horror. It lasted 8 hours in a row, it was unbearably scary. I went to bed, hoping that in the morning it would get better, everything would pass and return to the circles of everyday life. However, when I woke up, I felt the strongest anxiety. There was a feeling that the effect of the drugs had not gone anywhere. It seemed to me that they were still in my head, although I should have been released by now. nine0003

Being in a state of passion, it seemed to me that something had changed in me, that now I am not the same as before. But, looking ahead, I can say that now everything is fine, everything has returned to normal. And if you are now going through difficult moments and do not know how to get rid of it and whether it can be done at all, then read this book carefully to the end. I will share my experience, my knowledge with you, and together we will get out of this terrible hole.

So, at that moment I felt unbearably terrible, I was more and more consumed by apathy and constant heightened anxiety. For a week I felt empty, the world seemed gray and meaningless. Due to high anxiety, I constantly introspected myself, as if “checking” for normality. During the day, I asked myself if everything was fine, if I had gone crazy, what had changed in me, am I the same as before or not. Subsequently, this led me to derealization and depersonalization. Due to constant anxiety, my body turned on a certain defense mechanism and extinguished all my emotions. I began to feel extremely detached, the whole world seemed unreal, a toy. This state was very frightening, which contributed to even greater derealization. The inextricable circle of anxiety and derealization consumed me more and more, but I sometimes noticed that on some days or moments they were a little weaker. These were the days when I was distracted by something: studies, friends, films, walks. I started to cling to it, studied the issue of derealization more deeply. The whole situation began to dawn on me, ways to solve it, what could help me get out of it. Every day I gradually got better, more and more often I felt like the same person. nine0003

And now, 10 months later, I fully recovered and returned to my former, normal life. What helped me get out of this? How can you speed up your recovery process? What not to do and why? All these questions and more will be answered later in this book.

Chapter 2 Derealization and Depersonalization. The Mechanism of Appearance”

To cope with derealization, you first need to understand it, understand why and how it occurs.

Derealization and depersonalization are defense mechanisms of the psyche that are triggered in response to an extremely high level of stress. When the body gets tired due to nerves and experiences, then for your own protection it triggers derealization and depersonalization. And thanks to this, you move away from the body and your problems. Because of what, it begins to seem to a person that all the difficulties of life do not concern him. This also has a downside: the states of alienation from the body are unusual for us and therefore seem frightening.

Learn more