How do you get peace of mind
16 Ways to Find Peace of Mind
By Dr. John Delony
By Dr. John Delony
The most important thing I can tell you about your peace of mind is this: It’s not situational. A lot of us look for peace of mind by trying to predict the future, by controlling everything and everyone, or by putting our faith in a political candidate who makes us feel safe.
But when we try to anchor our sense of well-being to an ever-shifting, chaotic world, we will constantly feel anxious and unsettled.
True peace of mind is not contingent upon circumstances. It’s a way of being—a choice to rise above your situation. You have to be a person of peace and choose to live a life of peace, which paradoxically means you have to be ready to encounter difficulty. And the best way I know how to do this is to have practices that prepare you for life’s challenges when—not if—they come. Think of these practices as rebar—the metal rods embedded in concrete that keep it strong and structurally sound.
With that in mind, let’s talk about a few of the best practices for becoming a person of peace.
1. Face uncomfortable truths head on.
Finding peace of mind isn’t about erasing every uncomfortable emotion or thought. It’s about braving the rapids for stiller waters. Numbing, suppressing and avoiding discomfort and anxiety will only make everything worse. Don’t run from or judge your feelings. Instead, be compassionate and curious. Sometimes, simply giving yourself permission to call it like it is will allow you to feel tremendous relief.
Journaling is an excellent practice for unearthing what’s going on in your heart and mind. Get your swirling, chaotic thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Just sit down with a blank sheet of paper and write. Word vomit all over the page. Don’t edit yourself. And don’t lie or hide from yourself. The goal isn’t to be pretty or eloquent or even make sense—it’s to get in touch with what’s going on inside your head.
3. Connect with people you love and trust.
You cannot do life alone. Period. Healthy relationships are the foundation for a still mind and overall wellness. You need people. When you’re feeling stressed, anxious and lonely, go to someone who will listen to you, love you, and just be with you. Human connection is one of the most powerful antidotes to that low-grade anxiety that might be robbing you of your peace of mind.
4. Be active.
One of the best ways to get stress out of your body is to be active. Lift weights. Ride a bike. Join a team. Do anything you can to be active. Exercise will clear your mind and heal your body unlike anything else.
Your mental health matters. Order Own Your Past, Change Your Future today!
I love lifting weights in my home gym and getting outside in the woods and creeks with my kids for ridiculous adventures. I like going to jujitsu classes, playing church-league basketball, and taking long bike rides. For you, it might be playing soccer in the yard, crushing it on a rowing machine, or hiking. The best exercise plan is the one you’ll do.
5. Spend time outside.
Be outside whenever possible. Get a blanket if it’s cold or wear shorts if it’s too hot. But get outside. Nature is healing and restorative for your heart, mind and body. Put your bare feet in the grass, listen to the birds, take a hike, sit by a lake or a river and just breathe in the air.
Getting a full seven to nine hours of sleep every night is ridiculously important because sleep fixes so many health issues—including stress and anxiety. Sleep is about as close to a silver bullet as you can get.
If you have trouble actually getting to sleep because your thoughts are spinning, create a wind-down routine an hour before bed where you get off technology, dim the lights, take a relaxing bath, take pure supplements (not medications), read a good book, and meditate and journal to help calm your mind.
7. Eat well.
Along with sleep, nutrient-rich foods are a foundational pillar of health. There’s no such thing as “mental health” and “physical health.” It’s all just health. And food has a direct impact on your mood, as well as your body’s ability to function, respond and recover. A diet that’s high in sugar and processed foods and other trash will contribute significantly to your anxiety levels. Be a good steward of the one body you have and eat well.
8. Practice forgiveness.
Unresolved conflict can be a huge source of anxiety. Do you need to forgive someone for the hurt they caused you? Do you need to forgive yourself for a mistake that haunts you? Unforgiveness leads to bitterness, and it’s been said that bitterness is the poison we drink hoping someone else will die. Don’t carry the bricks of bitterness or anger. Set the bricks down. Choose to forgive.
9. Listen to music.
Music is healing for the soul—whether you’re jamming to ’80s hair metal (one of my personal favorites) or some lo-fi beats to create some Zen. Find a playlist or an album that brings you joy and turn up the volume.
10. Do something creative.
Creativity is a remarkable outlet for stress relief and peace. I love this quote from Brené Brown: “Unused creativity is not benign . . . It metastasizes into resentment, grief, heartbreak.” Is there a creative outlet you’ve been missing? Dust off your guitar. Start that business. Plant a garden. Cook a meal for your neighbors.
Getting lost in a good novel is another great way to increase creativity. Pick up a book and give your brain a break from problem-solving mode.
11. Practice gratitude every day.
I keep a gratitude journal every single day. I know this feels cheesy and Pinteresty, but it’s powerful and transformative. Anxiety keeps us fixated on past experiences or worried about future ones, but gratitude is grounding because it centers us in the present. It reminds us to stop complaining and whining and internalize our blessings.
Write down five things you’re grateful for, beginning with “I’m grateful for . . .” Gratitude is a foundational practice for a life of peace. Bonus points if you do this twice a day: when you first wake up and right before you go to bed.
12. Pay attention to and redirect your thoughts.
I don’t know about you, but the more stressed I become, the more I lose control of my thoughts. If I don’t step in, my brain starts to spiral, with unwelcome and frightening thoughts spinning faster and faster.
Ruminating (thinking the same things over and over) and worrying make us feel like we’re doing something important. We get a false sense of accomplishment from these mental scenarios: preparing for the worst, rehearsing disaster, or practicing imaginary hard conversations we’ll never have in real life. Hear me clearly: Ruminating and worrying are a complete waste of time. They do nothing except leave us feeling more helpless and anxious.
But here’s the exciting thing: We can learn to control our thoughts. We get to decide where we fix our attention. Pay attention to the thoughts running through your mind and redirect them to something actually true and pleasant and good to think about.
13. Try a meditation.
Okay, I know what you might be thinking: Meditation is a woo-woo practice for yogis and granola people that only eat kale. But in reality, meditation is the practice of paying attention to and controlling our thoughts. It’s learning where your body and your mind connect and how you can take a bird’s-eye view of your desires. It’s a game changer. My team and I put together a free meditation that will help you find peace of mind. Download it here.
14. Clear up your schedule.
You cannot outrun or outperform your anxiety and depression. Being rushed and overcommitted will destroy your peace of mind. Are you too busy? Stressed out by commitments you can’t keep? Look at how you’re spending your time and find things you can say no to. Slow down and find time to breathe.
15. Throw your screens out the window.
Okay, not really. But maybe. Our devices are stealing our attention, our joy and our ability to be present with ourselves and with others. I don’t propose that we all go off the grid and live in the woods without electricity or smartphones or plumbing. I’m writing this article on a laptop, and I just posted some quippy saying on Instagram. For most of us, technology is an important tool for our work and our lives. But I’m certain of the fact that we need to have major guardrails around technology use.
Reevaluate your relationship with technology. Is it serving you, or are you serving it? Treat your attention as your most important commodity. Treasure it. Value it. Protect it.
I’m a Christian guy, so prayer is important to me. It might not be for you, and that’s okay. But if you’re a person of faith, I encourage you to make regular time to pray and calm your spirit. I also like to write a Scripture verse on an index card (yeah, I’m old school like that) and carry it around with me throughout my day.
Regardless of your faith tradition or your relationship (or lack of) with God, we must all internalize one important truth: The universe does not revolve around you. Or me. We’re small, and our time on earth is short. There are much bigger things going on. Prayer reminds us to sit in our smallness and helps us remember that we all need help getting through each moment.
A Long-Term Solution for Finding Peace of Mind
Most of the time, our general sense of unease or stress or guilt stems from unresolved anxiety. It’s like a low-grade fever. It’s your brain and body’s way of letting you know something is off.
But here’s what’s exciting: Once you lean in and pay attention to the root cause of your anxiety, you can begin to make deep, lasting changes for healing. To get started, I invite you to check out my new book Own Your Past, Change Your Future.
Please go all in on this. You are worth being well.
Your Mental Health Matters
The weight you are carrying is real. Choose to set it down. Order Dr. John Delony's new book, Own Your Past, Change Your Future!
About the author
Dr. John Delony
Dr. John Delony is a mental health expert with two PhDs from Texas Tech University—one in counselor education and supervision and the other in higher education administration. Before joining Ramsey Solutions in 2020, John spent two decades in crisis response, walking with people through severe trauma. Now at Ramsey Solutions, John writes, speaks and teaches on relationships, mental health, anxiety and wellness. He also serves as co-host of The Ramsey Show, the second-largest talk show in the nation that’s heard by 18 million weekly listeners, as well as host of The Dr. John Delony Show. In 2022, John’s book Own Your Past, Change Your Future instantly became a #1 national bestseller. You can also find John featured on DailyMailTV, Fox Business and The Minimalists Podcast. Learn More.
How to Find Peace of Mind in 21 Ways
Having peace of mind is as important as keeping the body fit and the spirit young. However, with all the occupations that surround us in the world in which we live, it seems increasingly difficult to achieve this serenity. Nobody wants to suffer, and that is why adversity is something we never want to face in life. But difficulties are also powerful detonators of the potential of the human being to grow, overcome, and move forward. Read below to understand what peace of mind is and how you can achieve it.
Free meditation appDeclutter The Mind is an app that will teach you how to meditate, help you form the habit of a regular practice, and expand your mind to the teachings of mindfulness.
What is peace of mind?
The phrase peace of mind is about a sense of tranquility and confidence, where our mental balance is in accord with universal understanding. In short, it means that we have within ourselves the tools to deal with adversity. Thus, this ability occurs through mind control, where the effects of any external factors such as stress are also blocked.
How to achieve peace of mind
1. Think positive
At many times in your daily life, you live a situation, but your mind is far away thinking of other things. This is one of the main problems that make people feel restless and even stressed out. You cannot have inner peace if you don’t have your head in order. The way you think has a lot to do with the preoccupations you have every day. If you are pessimistic all the time, you are conditioning yourself to have a bad day, and things go wrong. Every time you have a negative thought, correct yourself immediately and see the bright side of the situation. Move your mind to a more positive mental state.
2. Practice meditation
Guided meditation stimulates creativity and opens the doors to solve problems in ways that you would not have thought of before. This act of concentration can bring many benefits of meditation into your life, as well as helping you cope better with your responsibility. Also, meditation prevents stress from taking over you. The best thing is that it is so simple to learn, and anyone can put it into practice at home. Once you are encouraged to try this good habit, you will never want to leave it, and you will feel much calmer inwardly. You can watch meditation videos about peace on YouTube.
3. Let things go
For the sake of your mental health, letting things go will allow you to have peace of mind. Life isn’t always fair. Sometimes, bad things happen to us, even though we’ve done nothing wrong. We could spend our whole lives getting revenge for all the injustices that happen to us, but then we also wouldn’t have peace of mind. Finding peace isn’t about being passive about what happens to us. It’s more so about having the self-control to not let it take over our thoughts and actions. Accepting an injustice, such as a dismissal of a job, will allow you to plan for your next chapter, interview, and job.
4. Focus on the present
If you want a peaceful mind, live in the present. When we have negative thoughts in our mind, we get stuck in the past. We’ll replay bad memories and painful situations. When we have anxious thoughts in our mind, it’s because we’re fearing the future. However, when we have happy thoughts, it’s because we’re living in the present. Pop culture glamorizes anxiety and depression in a lot of ways. The tabloids regularly cover people’s mental health breakdowns. What they don’t cover often, are people who have peace of mind and simply enjoy life. You can find peace by getting out of your head and experiencing the real world.
5. Accept what you can’t change
Acceptance is all about controlling what you can but accepting what you can’t control. There are billions of people in the world. Everyone has their own agenda, goals, wants, and needs. Your mental state will collapse if you’re always trying to control the uncontrollable. You can have peace of mind by understanding that sometimes things are outside of our control. Take ownership of what you can, such as your behaviour and attitude. However, accept the things you can’t like ruminating thoughts, other people, natural disasters, time, and so on. You can do everything in your power to prevent something from happening, but when the
6. Read at least twenty minutes a day
Reading is one of the best gifts of peace of mind you can give your brain. This is because it is not only an interesting hobby but also relaxes and gives you a greater capacity for concentration and reasoning. Don’t complain that you don’t have time to read a complete book. You only need to spend twenty minutes of your day reading a little to begin your finding peace journey. In this way, you will realize that it is not so difficult, but also entertaining and a great help. Don’t let your anxiety destroy your morning routine. If you want to have peace of mind, consider reading books about how the brain works, meditation, mindfulness, or other positive topics. There’s plenty of meditation books out there from you to choose from that will give you peace of mind.
7. Spend some time alone
Your well being will greatly improve when you spend some time alone. While it’s important to build social connections with others, most of the time, our peace of mind is disrupted by others. When things get a little too chaotic and you can’t get a minute’s peace, consider removing your worry by isolating yourself temporarily. Being alone every now and then can be great for your health, happiness, and inner peace. Experiencing the mental freedom of being alone will allow you to recharge your batteries, build yourself back up, and move forward. Before you do this, tell other people where you’ll be so they don’t worry. For example, some people might choose to take a one or two-week vacation alone to pull themselves together. Sometimes, a little break will give your mind peace and the feeling that you can solve your problem.
8. Relax your expectations
Life never follows the path you have outlined in your plans. Many times we spend too much time thinking about how things are going to be in our future. But when reality does not meet our expectations, we get frustrated quickly. The truth is that what you need will come in the form of what you expect from life. The best thing is to go through those difficult moments without seeing the problems.
Remember that if things don’t go as planned, it does not mean that they are not taking you along the path you need. Always look for the lesson of each situation and don’t let these “detours” steal your peace of mind. Learn to accept reality and the part of it that you cannot change. That is the best starting point for you to discover the ones that you can modify and how to do it.
9. Speak with a therapist
Finding a therapist to speak with once a month can help you have peace of mind. A therapist can improve your well being by giving you the tools you need to manage ruminating thoughts, promote calmness, and embrace yourself. Rest assured, seeing a therapist is good for your mental health. It can be really healthy to have a sounding board to prevent your thoughts from destroying your peace of mind. Challenge any preconceived notions of what it means to see a therapist as it can bring you joy and sign you up for success.
Create an exercise routine when you want peace of mind. While exercise can feel like the opposite thing you feel like doing when stressed, it can bring about a sense of calm and relaxation. Running can make you feel free while pumping you up with feel-good endorphins to help calm the mind. Challenge yourself to exercise at least four days a week or by setting a goal of 10,000 steps a day. Any distress you feel will vanish when moving your body. Exercise is like free therapy. So test yourself to push harder and fight the urge to sit back.
11. Give yourself time
Resilience is not a speed competition, take all the time you need to overcome adversity and take on the necessary learning. Healing emotional pain is a complex process, and like all, it is best concluded without unnecessary haste. Do not be pressured to take the lessons and do not allow others to place excessive expectations on you to move forward. Overcoming some things is not a matter of a couple of days, it takes a lot of effort and learning to feel good again.
Live the moment to find peace of mind, and see one step at a time. Keep in mind that not because yesterday was a particularly painful day, it will be to even today. Not because today is a difficult day, every day will be the same. If you break, then get up and keep walking. Nothing happens because it is hard for you to move on or because the strength fails. Explore your pain, recognize it, and work on it to overcome difficulties.
12. Do daily acts of kindness
The easiest way to have peace of mind is by doing acts of kindness daily. Every day choose to do a good deed for another person. You could write a kind comment on a Facebook post, call a loved one to tell them why you love them and are grateful for them, or write an article with ideas that’ll help someone in distress. There are millions of kind gestures you can do. When someone hurts you, recognize that they’re in pain, instead of evil or mean-spirited. And in response, do something kind for them too. You can send a note or call them on the phone to tell them why you love them despite how they’ve hurt you.
It’s easier to have peace of mind when you’re well-rested. Those who only sleep a few hours each night are more likely to have racing thoughts, anxiety, and even depression. Sleep allows you to process the day’s information subconsciously. When you sleep a full eight hours each night, your brain is likely calmer so it’s easier to deal with the personal issues that arises during difficult periods. A calm mind means that you’ll be able to handle difficult situations with kindness and grace. So, aim to get some shut eye each night by going to bed a bit earlier to wake up with peace of mind.
14. Open your feelings with someone you trust
Being mentally strong does not mean not having feelings, but knowing how to handle them. It is natural that in the face of adversity, you feel overwhelmed and crying. Keeping your pain or worry can plunge you into isolation that causes you a sense of loneliness and even depression. Your friends, family, and loved ones are there to support and accompany you even in the most challenging parts of your life. Go to them when you need them. Having someone you trust at your side will help you channel those emotions to leave your mind and body more easily.
15. Take a walk
We are part of nature, and that is why being in it is so good. Even if you live in a large city, you can find ways to maintain that contact, such as in parks, or some green area. Try to include this kind of walk in your routine, step on the grass, touch trees, enjoy this powerful connection, and recharge your batteries to gain some peace of mind. Another thing you can also do is go rollerblading or cycling. The idea is to take a quiet walk without interruptions and enjoy it to the fullest.
16. Listen to classical or ambient music
The power of sound within the mind is incredible, to such an extent that certain songs calm us and make us feel happy. The classic compositions are the most recommended to stimulate the brain, increasing its ability to concentrate and study. They also provide immense calm to the body. Ambient sounds that mimic nature are another very effective alternative with which you can try. Especially when you are meditating, taking a walk, or doing something artistic. You can also listen to positive songs that uplift you.
17. Practice Gratitude
Writing a gratitude list will help you reduce the feeling of stress by reminding you of all the good things you have in your life. Every day, think about the things you’re grateful for having. Or write down good things that happened to you that day that you feel grateful for. You could be grateful for having specific people in your life or certain opportunities. The phrase, “I’m grateful for…” should be in your regular vocabulary when interacting with others. Let people know you appreciate them. Test yourself by writing down your gratitude list without looking at other people’s lists. Then, look at other people’s lists and compare what you have that you completely didn’t realize.
18. Avoid comparing yourself to others
Stop comparing yourself to others if you want to have peace of mind. You’ll have greater peace by focusing on comparing yourself today to who you were than by comparing yourself to someone else. The feeling of insecurity vanishes when the comparison game is only played with yourself. Strive to become a better version of yourself, but don’t beat yourself up for not being that person yet. There’s no need to wonder “what is wrong with me?” or “why am I not good enough?” Instead, ask yourself, “what would the future me do to have peace of mind?” and then start building those traits into your life.
19. Look at things from a different perspective
Sometimes, physical or temporal distance is all you need to see more clearly and better understand problems. Regardless of the problem that comes your way, always be clear about the good and positive things you have as a person. A very real part of you exists independently of your immediate concerns, problems, and frustrations. If you feel overwhelmed, step back, and observe the way you experience things. Your body may feel pain, but that does not define you. Eventually, that pain will dissipate and leave you learning.
20. Love and practice self care
Always remember to love yourself, treat yourself with love, forgive yourself, and finally treat yourself the same way you treat a loved one. When you love and respect yourself, life becomes lighter because you no longer charge yourself with unreachable perfection. You see yourself more humanely and kindly.
21. Prepare for rainy days
You can help yourself have peace of mind by preparing for rainy days. In life, curveballs will always happen, such as sudden job loss, death of a loved one, or an unexpected big expense. You can prepare for these rainy days in so many ways. For example, if you save up in an emergency fund or build out your income streams, you’ll be prepared for unexpected job losses or big expenses. Telling loved ones how much you appreciate them while they’re alive will prevent any guilt you may feel from an unexpected death. You can have greater peace by having open conversations with people and planning ahead.
Every day is a new beginning and a new opportunity to improve things and keep growing. Do not focus on the past or what it could be, but work to improve your future prospects and gain greater learning. Keep your mind at peace, and remember that the world does not end with problems. Every day you have the opportunity to recalculate your course if necessary. Learning to interpret difficulties and not clinging to frustration takes time. It’s up to you to decide how you want to deal with problems. When we realize this, it’s actually more empowering than frightening, bringing more peace of mind to our life.
45 ways to find peace of mind
June 5, 2013 Life Inspiration
In our age of haste, lack of rest and excess of information, it is not easy to know Zen. We often get nervous over trifles. It's time to learn how to live differently.
We don't know how to deal with stress. For many, relaxation comes down to alcohol, coffee with a cigarette, or extreme hobbies. Meanwhile, there are simple methods to restore peace of mind in just a few minutes.
We remembered as many as 45 ways.
- Take a deep breath for one-two-three-four, hold your breath for the same count, then slowly exhale.
- Take a pen and write down your thoughts on paper.
- Recognize that life is complicated.
- Think of your three most successful events in your life.
- Tell your loved one what they mean to you.
- Sit down and do nothing.
- Allow yourself to sit back for a while.
- Look at the clouds for a few minutes.
- Imagine that you are seeing your life from a bird's eye view.
- Defocus your eyes and for a couple of minutes catch everything that happens around you with your peripheral vision.
- Give a small amount to charity.
- Mentally place yourself inside a transparent bubble that protects you.
- Put your hand on your heart and feel it beat. This is great.
- Tell yourself that you will stay positive for the rest of the day. No matter what.
- Be grateful that you don't always get what you want.
- Think about how you would live your life if you knew for sure that you would never become rich.
- Let your body do what it wants at this moment.
- Smell fresh flowers.
- Listen to your inner critic as if it were your best friend.
- Identify the tightest part of your body. Tighten it with all your might for a few seconds, and then relax.
- Go outside and touch something 100% natural. Feel the texture.
- Look around and label each object. Realize how simple these things really are.
- Smile the stupidest smile in the world and imagine what you look like.
- Think of your big problem as if it were a friend of yours.
- Imagine that your roots extend to the center of the planet.
- Massage your head with all ten fingers.
- Count from 10 to 1 and listen for the echo after each digit.
- Feel the ground beneath you with your bare feet and be aware of your connection with the earth.
- Stop focusing on other people.
- Dare to say no. Bolder.
- Write a list of all your problems. Then filter out the ones that don't depend on you or are not very important.
- Drink some water. Dehydration causes stress.
- Live within your means.
- Be aware of the difference between your desires and your needs.
- Sincerely apologize to… Well, you yourself know who you are to blame for.
- Think about the vastness of the universe and understand how invisible your troubles are.
- Refuse to give a quick answer to a difficult question and seek a solution at a deeper level.
- Make extra time for your child.
- Listen to white noise. It's relaxing.
- Write down the best advice you have ever received and apply it.
- Walk the dog. Maybe with someone else.
- Close your eyes and let the sun warm your eyelids.
- Admit your mistakes.
- Look at other people and realize that they are just like you, with their own hopes, dreams, fears and struggles.
- Agree that there will always be someone richer, smarter and stronger.
What are the psychological techniques that calm you best?
Read also 🧐
- Understanding why you can't "just calm down"
- How to Calm Down Quickly: 7 Science-Based Ways
- Why Some People Get Annoyed for No Reason and How to Calm Your Nerves
Peace of mind - Symphony based on the works of the venerable Optina elders. Volume 1
compiler Tereshchenko TN
Symphony based on the works of the Optina Elders. Volume 1 epub fb2 pdf Original: pdf11Mb
You wish peace and tranquility. But you can never reach it. O! this is a great gift of God, and the Lord Himself showed us where to look for it . .. And to achieve this, temptations and sorrows are necessary, just as the Lord Himself, before His death on the Cross, suffered and suffered a lot: he was reproached, annoyed, humiliated, and left us We are an image, let us follow His footsteps ... I will also tell you: peace and tranquility are a great reward, but just as warriors receive a reward for exploits and shedding of blood, so we - spiritual warriors - must first endure many temptations and sorrows with humility, accuse ourselves, and not others, and having diminished (thus) our passions, i.e. having overcome them, and even more pride and exaltation, anger, rage, etc., then we will be rewarded with this gift - peace of mind (St. Macarius, 20).
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You wish for peace and tranquility of your soul, but this is a reward from God's grace for labors, deeds and temptations... and what have you suffered, and are you looking for rewards? Humble yourself and consider yourself unworthy of it. And let me remind you from spiritual elders: “Whoever seeks peace, he runs away from it, and whoever commits himself to the cross with humble wisdom finds peace” (St. Macarius, 20).
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Peace is not achieved without a struggle with passions and victory over them, and when they are our masters, where is peace? - Is it not always captivity? (St. Macarius, 20).
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Our non-peace comes from our disorder, and not from other people's passions: with their vices, they do not put non-worldliness into our hearts, but only expose and show us what is in us and what guarantee we have in ourselves (St. Macarius, 20).
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We, sinning before God, lose the world, but by repentance it returns - by the mercy of God. Similarly, we are deprived of peace, accepting sorrow and enmity against people, and when we extinguish this flame by self-reproach, then peace will also be established (St. Macarius, 20).
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I wrote to you so that your world would not be presumptuous, but put a guard: love and humility. Love does not fall, and humility will not allow it even more and will strengthen it, but here work is needed, not words (St. Macarius, 20).
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Your question to the gospel words: and on earth peace (Luke 2:14), “Where is peace?” - not very smart. The world is given to us, but we ourselves are the reason that we are deprived of it; let us fulfill the commandments of God, then nothing can take away peace from us. We must seek love and peace in ourselves, and not demand them from people. When there could be no insults to our temptation, then why would there be a commandment about patience and love for enemies? Before the coming of Christ, people were under an oath and had no peace, by this (coming) they were reconciled with the Father (St. Macarius, 20).
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If you want to always be peaceful, do not part with anyone in displeasure, but do your best to forgive everyone from the bottom of your heart and even, if possible, appease them in order to disperse in a peaceful spirit, then you yourself will enjoy peace of mind (St. Moses, 23).
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Why is there no peace in our bones (Ps. 37:4), in our soul and in our heart? From our sins! Because we do not learn at all in humility, because we love to argue and prove that we know everything more than others, because we do not leave the conversation with our thoughts, which, instead of executioners, constantly torment us (St. Anthony, 20).
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God save you from special parties, so that one another does not know; it means to destroy the love planted by God and approved by our Lord Jesus Christ Himself. He commanded us: By this everyone will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another (Jn. 13, 35), and if there is none, then whose disciples will they be?
The cause of our salvation requires in every place, wherever a person lives, the fulfillment of the commandments of God and obedience to the will of God. This only acquires the peace of the soul, and nothing else, as it is said in the Psalms: The world is great for those who love Your law, and there is no stumbling block for them (Ps. 118, 165). And you are still looking for inner peace and peace of mind from external circumstances. Everything seems to you that you live in the wrong place, that you have settled with the wrong people, that you yourself did not order it that way and that others seemed to act in the wrong way. The Holy Scripture says: His dominion is in every place (see Ps. 102, 22), i.e. God's, and that the salvation of one Christian soul is dearer to God than all the things of the whole world (St. Ambrose, 1).
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Not in vain is it said in the Psalms: seek peace and strive for it (Ps. 33, 15), i. in every possible way avoid that which disturbs the peace of your soul, no matter how plausible it may seem. God judges a person not just by deeds, but by the intention of deeds, and only He alone knows this intention. If we are weak in something, then we must bring sincere repentance in this, and humble ourselves, and not condemn anyone, and not annoy anyone (St. Ambrose, 1).
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You write... that you would agree to live in N. if you would receive spiritual satisfaction. But it fully belongs only to the future age, and on earth it is prescribed for us to have sorrowful trials, as the Lord Himself says: In the world you will have sorrow (Jn. 16, 33). These words clearly show that although you go to all the places of the whole world, but you will not find a sorrowful situation anywhere, everywhere you will need humility, and patience, and non-judgment of others. It is only by these spiritual means that a peaceful disposition of the soul is acquired in proportion to how much we will stretch towards humility, and long-suffering, and non-judgment of others (St. Ambrose, 1).
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In order to calm down, there is no need to go on a long journey, but it is better to put up at home, it will be stronger. Some royal persons go far away for the sake of appeasement. It is necessary to be forced to humility and self-reproach. The prudent robber was even killed with his legs - for the sake of receiving the Kingdom of Heaven promised by the Lord, he endured everything, and how do you and I want to receive God's mercy? Look around, sister! People go to Kyiv on pilgrimage, and not on domestic claims (St. Ambrose, 3, part 3).
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You write that you drink holy water and smoke cherubic incense, but you do not find peace. Holy water should be drunk less often, and do not smoke cherubic incense. No incense will help you, since the whole thing is arrogance, from which all your spiritual battles intensify and you are deprived of peace (St. Ambrose, 3, part 3).
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in a peaceful and humble spirit, do not judge anyone and do not annoy anyone, trying to make our word, according to the apostolic commandment, be dissolved with spiritual salt (St. Ambrose, 3, part 3).
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It is said: to those who love God... everything works together for good (Rom. 8, 28). And in another place: peace is great among those who love your law, and there is no stumbling block for them (Ps. 118, 165). And if there is no peace in our bones (see Ps. 37:4), then it is clear that it is from our sins and passions. And therefore, one should take care not to settle the circumstances, but to try to correct oneself. This is not only more reliable, but also more reassuring (St. Ambrose, 5).
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Our soul is invisible and cannot be calmed by external circumstances alone, but requires internal and spiritual means for its pacification, which are pointed out by the God-inspired prophet David, saying: Peace is great for those who love Your law, and there is no stumbling block for them (Ps. 118, 165). These words show that you must first love the Law of God and try to fulfill the gospel commandments mentioned by the Evangelist Matthew from the beginning of chapter 5 to chapter 10, and then you can hope to receive lasting peace and lasting peace of mind (St. Ambrose, 15).
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Listen, sister! Don't be awake, don't be colorful! But be constant and humble and you will be peaceful! (St. Ambrose, 14).
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Jesus Christ was born to bring peace to the earth. Therefore, if you wish to have peace, then have Jesus, if not in your heart, then at least in your mouth (St. Anatoly, 18).
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When the soul is cleansed of passions and especially demonic pride by sorrows, patience and humility, and finds peace, then it is worthy of the Epiphany, i.e. God Himself can be seen as a soul and lives in it. And His place was in the world . And the following words: and His habitation in Zion (Ps. 75, 3). It's still far away from you. It takes a lot of mind and feats to ascend to this. And you can find peace first in your soul, and then with your sisters, and then with God. Then we will have the Epiphany. Therefore, try to win the desired peace. Of course, you yourself cannot, but ask God, and he will give you peace, every mind is superior walking (Flp.