How do u stop anxiety
Get help with anxiety, fear or panic
Most people feel anxious or scared sometimes, but if it's affecting your life there are things you can try that may help.
Support is also available if you're finding it hard to cope with anxiety, fear or panic.
Symptoms of anxiety
Anxiety can cause many different symptoms. It might affect how you feel physically, mentally and how you behave.
It's not always easy to recognise when anxiety is the reason you're feeling or acting differently.
Physical symptoms- faster, irregular or more noticeable heartbeat
- feeling lightheaded and dizzy
- headaches
- chest pains
- loss of appetite
- sweating
- breathlessness
- feeling hot
- shaking
- feeling tense or nervous
- being unable to relax
- worrying about the past or future
- feeling tearful
- not being able to sleep
- difficulty concentrating
- fear of the worst happening
- intrusive traumatic memories
- obsessive thoughts
- not being able to enjoy your leisure time
- difficulty looking after yourself
- struggling to form or maintain relationships
- worried about trying new things
- avoiding places and situations that create anxiety
- compulsive behaviour, such as constantly checking things
Symptoms of a panic attack
If you experience sudden, intense anxiety and fear, it might be the symptoms of a panic attack. Other symptoms may include:
- a racing heartbeat
- feeling faint, dizzy or lightheaded
- feeling that you're losing control
- sweating, trembling or shaking
- shortness of breath or breathing very quickly
- a tingling in your fingers or lips
- feeling sick (nausea)
A panic attack usually lasts 5 to 30 minutes. They can be very frightening, but they're not dangerous and should not harm you.
Information:
If you're not sure how you feel, try our mood self-assessment.
Things you can try to help with anxiety, fear and panic
Do
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try talking about your feelings to a friend, family member, health professional or counsellor.
You could also contact Samaritans, call: 116 123 or email: [email protected] if you need someone to talk to -
use calming breathing exercises
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exercise – activities such as running, walking, swimming and yoga can help you relax
-
find out how to get to sleep if you're struggling to sleep
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eat a healthy diet with regular meals to keep your energy levels stable
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consider peer support, where people use their experiences to help each other. Find out more about peer support on the Mind website
-
listen to free mental wellbeing audio guides
Don’t
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do not try to do everything at once – set small targets that you can easily achieve
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do not focus on the things you cannot change – focus your time and energy into helping yourself feel better
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do not avoid situations that make you anxious – try slowly building up time spent in worrying situations to gradually reduce anxiety
-
try not to tell yourself that you're alone; most people experience anxiety or fear at some point in their life
-
try not to use alcohol, cigarettes, gambling or drugs to relieve anxiety as these can all contribute to poor mental health
Audio: Anxiety control training
In this audio guide, a doctor explains how you can take control of anxiety.
Media last reviewed: 2 March 2021
Media review due: 2 March 2024
Information:
Further information and support
- Mind: anxiety and panic attacks – how can I help myself?
- Mind: anxiety and panic attacks – what is a panic attack?
- Every Mind Matters: self-help cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) techniques – get help with anxiety and worries, improve your sleep and boost your mental wellbeing
Where to get NHS help for anxiety, fear and panic
Referring yourself for therapy
If you need more support, you can get free psychological therapies like cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) on the NHS.
You can refer yourself directly to an NHS psychological therapies service (IAPT) without a referral from a GP.
Non-urgent advice: See a GP if:
- you're struggling to cope with anxiety, fear or panic
- things you're trying yourself are not helping
- you would prefer to get a referral from a GP
Urgent advice: Ask for an urgent GP appointment or call 111 if:
- you need help urgently, but it's not an emergency
111 can tell you the right place to get help if you need to see someone. Go to 111.nhs.uk or call: 111.
Immediate action required: Call 999 or go to A&E now if:
- you or someone you know needs immediate help
- you have seriously harmed yourself – for example, by taking a drug overdose
A mental health emergency should be taken as seriously as a medical emergency.
Find your nearest A&E
Causes of anxiety, fear and panic
There are many different causes of anxiety, fear or panic and it's different for everyone.
When you're feeling anxious or scared, your body releases stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol.
This can be helpful in some situations, but it might also cause physical symptoms such as an increased heart rate and increased sweating. In some people, it might cause a panic attack.
Regular anxiety, fear or panic can also be the main symptom of several health conditions. Do not self-diagnose – speak to a GP if you're worried about how you're feeling.
Identifying the cause
If you know what's causing anxiety, fear or panic, it might be easier to find ways to manage it.
Some examples of possible causes include:
- work – feeling pressure at work, unemployment or retirement
- family – relationship difficulties, divorce or caring for someone
- financial problems – unexpected bills or borrowing money
- health – illness, injury or losing someone (bereavement)
- difficult past experiences – bullying, abuse or neglect
Even significant life events such as buying a house, having a baby or planning a wedding could lead to feelings of stress and anxiety.
You might find it hard to explain to people why you feel this way, but talking to someone could help you find a solution.
Find out more about the 5 steps to mental wellbeing.
Conditions related to anxiety, fear and panic
| Symptoms | Possible cause |
|---|---|
| feelings of anxiety that will not go away, anxiety is affecting your life | generalised anxiety disorder |
| overwhelming fear of something specific like an object, place or animal | phobias |
| regularly experiencing panic attacks | panic disorder |
| often reliving traumatic past experiences, nightmares and flashbacks | post-traumatic stress disorder |
How to Ease Your Anxiety
Everyone feels anxious from time to time.
Occasional anxiety is a normal reaction to uncertainty about what’s going to happen next, whether that’s in the next few minutes, days, or months.
Mental health experts define anxiety as worry over a threat that’s still in your future. Thinking about a conversation you dread, for example, could twist your stomach into knots days before it happens. Your heart may race before an exam or presentation. You might lie awake at night worried about whether you’ll catch COVID-19 at the grocery store.
It’s also normal to want to get rid of those uncomfortable, pit-of-the-stomach feelings as quickly as possible. But that approach can make you more anxious, says David H. Rosmarin, PhD, associate professor of psychology at Harvard Medical School in Boston.
“When you worry about getting rid of your anxiety, you’re signaling your nervous system that you have even more to be anxious about. And that makes your anxiety worse,” he says.
Keep in mind that if your anxiety is long-lasting and interferes with your daily life, you could have an anxiety disorder.
In that case, you may need treatment to overcome it.
Calm Anxiety by Accepting It
It’s not what people expect to hear. But one of the most effective ways to ease occasional anxiety is to accept it, says Rosmarin, who is also founder of the Center for Anxiety in New York City.
“When we let anxiety run its course in the moment without fighting it, ironically, that makes it less. On the other hand, fighting anxiety is what typically [triggers] a panic attack,” he says.
“And, if your only strategy is to distract yourself from your anxiety or to avoid things that cause it, you’ll always be afraid of it. It’s always going to be the bully in the schoolyard because you’ve never learned to deal with it.”
The Anxiety and Depression Association of America puts it this way: “The thoughts you resist persist.”
Try these steps instead:
Recognize and understand your anxiety: Tell yourself, “My nervous system is kicking into high gear because I’m worried about [thing X].
”
Don’t criticize yourself for those feelings: Instead, say, “This is a normal, healthy response by my body to these circumstances, which are complicated, stressful, or difficult. It’s OK to feel this way.”
Know that you can have anxiety and still function well: “You can perform very well with anxiety, and probably have done so before,” Rosmarin says.
Think back to a time when you were anxious but did what you needed to do anyway. Maybe you were filled with anxiety before an event or a meeting. But later, someone said you did a great job.
How to Stop Anxiety
When your anxiety feels overwhelming, these techniques can give you quick, short-term relief.
Do a reality check: Ask yourself these questions:
- On scale of 1 to 100, how likely is it that the thing I’m anxious about will happen?
- Do I have good reasons to think something will go wrong?
- Is there a chance I’m overly worried?
Share your anxiety with someone you trust: Don’t avoid your anxious thoughts, which can make them worse.
Talk them over with a friend or family member, who can help you put them in perspective.
Remind yourself that you’re safe: “When anxiety kicks in you may feel scared or out of control, with your mind racing to all these uncertain future catastrophes,” says clinical psychologist Debra Kissen, PhD, chief executive officer of Light On Anxiety CBT Treatment Centers in the Chicago area.
“Ask yourself, ‘Is there a real danger in front of me, or am I actually safe at home and worried about something that’s no threat to me right now?’” she says. “This thinking can ground you in the moment and reboot your brain and body so you feel less anxious.”
Redirect nervous energy: Anxiety can be like a motor revving, says licensed professional counselor Lisa Henderson. “Take control of that energy and put it somewhere else,” says Henderson, co-founder and chief executive officer of Synchronous Health in Nashville.
“If you’re sitting there worried, for example, get up and walk or pace,” she says.
“Take a few minutes to clean something. Go outside for 5 minutes. Shorts bursts of activity can release that anxious energy.”
Take a mental break: “Use a guided imagery app or simply daydream on your own,” Henderson says. “A brief mental vacation can break the cycle of anxious thoughts.”
To try this on your own, set a timer for a few minutes, close your eyes, and picture yourself somewhere you feel peaceful or happy.
“Just letting your mind wander can work well if your anxiety comes from feeling controlled or managed,” Henderson says. “If your mind returns to its anxious thoughts, notice -- without judgment -- that it’s happened and mentally tell your anxiety ‘I’ll be with you in a moment.’ Then go back to your daydream.”
You may prefer an app that guides you through your thoughts to help you release anxiety. Find relaxation or meditation apps that appeal to you and give them try.
Just breathe: Inhale and exhale slowly, evenly, and deeply for several breaths.
Change your position: “Whatever you’re doing, do the opposite,” Kissen says. “If you’re hunched over with worry, stand up and take a Wonder Woman pose. If you’re under a blanket, go wash your face with cold water. Changing your sensory experience can ‘change the channel’ from anxiety.”
Use a mantra: A mantra can shift your mind away from anxious thoughts that play over and over in your head, Kissen says.
Two she likes are: “These thoughts are uncomfortable, but not dangerous,” and “This, too, will pass.”
Put your anxiety on a schedule: Pick a 15-minute window during the day to think about your anxieties. “During that time, tell your brain to just go for it and let the anxious thoughts come,” Kissen says. “But when they arise outside that time, tell them ‘I’m willing to hear you, but come back tomorrow at 3 p.m.’”
If anxiety keeps you awake, get up: “If you’re lying in bed worrying about things for more than 5 minutes, get up and go to another room and write down your anxieties,” Kissen says.
“Go back to bed when you’re tired, but get up again if you feel anxious. It might take a few nights of going back and forth, but this exercise can train your brain that your bed is for sleep, not for anxiety.”
Do I Need Treatment for Anxiety?
There’s a lot you can do on your own to relieve anxiety, but sometimes you need help. Psychotherapy and medication are the two main treatments for anxiety disorders.
Signs that it’s time to talk to a mental health professional include:
- Constant or nearly constant anxiety
- Anxiety that gets in the way of your daily activities, like work or social life
- Anxiety about things that don’t actually threaten you
- Panic attacks
Check your health insurance policy to see what mental health services your plan covers. Then, review a list of your in-network providers to find one to connect with.
“You don’t want to add to your anxiety by paying big out-of-pocket fees,” Kissen says.
Your primary care doctor may also be able to recommend a mental health professional with experience treating anxiety and anxiety disorders.
Rosmarin notes that it’s important to find a provider you click with and trust. He also says therapy doesn’t need to go on indefinitely to be effective.
“A course of cognitive behavioral therapy for anxiety may be eight to 10 sessions,” he says. “There’s also data to suggest that people feel substantially better after just one therapy session for panic disorder.”
How to stop winding yourself up: 10 recommendations from Dale Carnegie's book
Contents of the article
Excitement and anxiety accompany us everywhere: at home and at work, on the bus and in the store, in line and in traffic jams. There is practically no person who does not face excitement. But some people can pull themselves together and survive an unpleasant moment, while others begin to wind themselves up even more, turning simple anxiety into chronic stress. We've summarized the tips from psychologist Dale Carnegie in How to Stop Worrying and Start Living? to change your perspective and reduce stress.
Tip 1. Distinguish between the past and the present
To stop overthinking yourself and worrying about problems that may happen in the future, you need to live in the present. Dale Carnegie proposes to mentally install an "iron curtain" that will delimit the past and the future, preventing a person from regretting old mistakes once again or thinking about tomorrow's difficulties.
Advice 2. Answer the Questions
At the height of your panic attack, ask yourself three questions from Willis Carrier's magical formula from Dale Carnegie's book.
- What is the worst thing that can happen in this situation?
- How can this problem be solved?
- Will I be able to cope with these difficulties?
If you honestly answer these questions for yourself, you will understand that even in the worst case scenario, you will be able to cope with trouble.
Tip 3. Think about the harmful effects of stress
In times of stress, you must constantly remember the harm that anxiety can do to your body.
The author of the book cites the sad fact that business people who live in chronic stress die early. Therefore, it is important to take care of yourself and stay calm.
Tip 4. Think positively
Cheerful thoughts can reduce anxiety and calm down quickly. To do this, you need to develop positive thinking in yourself, try to maintain a good mood and look at life with a smile.
Advice 5. Start acting
When a person is inactive, bad thoughts begin to creep into his head. The best way to get rid of them is to keep yourself busy. So the brain will switch to action, and psychological stress will decrease.
Tip 6. Get rid of the habit of being nervous
Surely you have met people who, for any reason, begin to worry. For them, anxiety for no reason has already become a habit, which is still better to get rid of. To do this is simple - create a new useful habit - do not worry about trifles.
Advice 7. Do not worry about what has already happened
Many people continue to reproach themselves for past mistakes that cannot be corrected.
In this situation, you need to accept the inevitable and let go of the past. Just say to yourself, “What happened that should have happened” and calm down.
Advice 8. Set an acceptable level of emotions
To control excitement and anxiety, you need to mentally set a "limiter" to your emotions. Just assess the situation and determine the acceptable level of experience, beyond which you can not go.
As you can see, Dale Carnegie's recommendations are quite simple and easy to apply in everyday life. The main thing to do is to firmly decide to change your thinking. You can also study the nature of stress and master relaxation techniques - see the instructions in the free online course "Stress Management".
How to Stop Worrying: 12 Failing Strategies
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Books How to Practice Antistress
1. You are looking for confirmation
You worry that you don't look good enough and keep asking your partner, "Do you think I'm okay?" It seems to you that chest pain is the first symptom of cancer, and you often visit doctors to find out: “Will I live?” Or maybe you're nervous about a guy you met at a party.
"He yawned, was he bored with me?" - ask your friend.
The problem is that one confirmation is not enough. You will look for them again and again, trying to get more guarantees in order to reduce your anxiety and insecurity for at least the next couple of minutes. But no confirmation helps, because you will soon begin to doubt the confirmation itself.
Maybe your friend is just encouraging you by saying that you look good, but in reality she thinks otherwise. Or the doctor can't tell for sure if it's cancer without doing certain tests. In doing so, you are trying to gain assurance, rather than learning to live with insecurity, which is a very important element in dealing with anxiety.
2. You are trying to stop thinking
You may have heard of stop thought therapy, which involves getting rid of negative or unwanted thoughts by suppressing them. Its essence is this. Every time you are worried that you will lose all your money in the stock market, you must force yourself to stop thinking about it, flick your wrist with a rubber band, or mentally shout to yourself: “Stop!”.
This is supposed to reduce your nervousness.
Unfortunately, not only does this method not work, but it leads to a "rebound thought" and only worsens the situation in the long run
Let's check the "stop thought". Close your eyes and relax. Imagine a clear image of a polar bear - cute and fluffy. Now that you have a vivid picture in your head, I want you to stop thinking about polar bears for the next ten minutes. No matter what you do, don't think about any polar bears. Psychologists have long noticed that attempts to suppress certain thoughts lead to their renewal or even intensification.
3. You collect information
When you are worried about something, you try to find out everything you can about the problem. Knowledge is power, isn't it? After all, this is how we find out the facts. Perhaps you really collected a number of facts (or perhaps not). But even real facts can be selected biased, that is, on the basis of prejudice, and misleading.
This is what happens when you are looking for information to support your negative beliefs. You see a trend that doesn't exist, you overestimate the risk and give importance to what is unimportant. When you try to figure out whether a negative prediction can come true - “What if I have cancer?”, You find the information you need and tend to confirm the prediction.
If you are worried that you are annoying someone, you will not only look for any signs that this person is treating you badly, but you will also interpret their neutral behavior as negative. Research shows that chronic neurotics view neutral or ambiguous information as a threat.
Shy people consider any complex facial expression to be angry
Psychologists have also found that when we gather information about a threat in a state of anxiety (for example, the possibility of a plane crash, a terrorist attack, or contracting a dangerous disease), we almost always overestimate the risk.
At times like this, we don't try to figure out the most important thing, which is, "How often does the worst thing NOT happen?" If you're afraid of flying, how carefully do you search for information about planes that land successfully? If you fear being fired, do you keep track of how many days/months/years you haven't been fired?
4. You check again and again
You try to reduce your anxiety by making sure everything is in order. You think: “I may have forgotten something”, “I must have missed something”, “If I can detect some little thing in advance, then I can prevent the worst” and “I should check everything, then (perhaps) I can do something.” The key points are as follows:
-
"If I figure everything out, I can reduce my uncertainty."
-
"I can't stand uncertainty."
-
"If I detect the signs of disaster early, I can prevent the worst."
-
"I can't rely entirely on my memory."
-
"Caution is never too much.
" -
"This is my responsibility."
You think you look terrible. Every time you think about it, you rush to the mirror to make sure your makeup is in order. You look at yourself in a magnifying mirror, which allows you to see any wrinkle or broken capillary in the eye. This, of course, makes you even more worried about your appearance.
You explain to yourself: “I look in the mirror to see something wrong early on and do something about it.” . This reduces anxiety: fixing your makeup makes you feel better for a while, and avoiding social events feels safer.
What you don't know is that going to a party would help you overcome your anxiety. Checking never addresses the root of your anxiety: "I can't stand being insecure." Checks cost you stress, time, and energy, and reinforce your belief that constant monitoring is necessary to feel safe. What about the meaning? For a period of five minutes to an hour you feel better, and then you need to make sure again.
5. You avoid discomfort
A common way to deal with anxiety is to avoid or put off what worries or worries you. If you're worried about taxes, you're avoiding filing your tax return. If you are worried that something is seriously ill, then put off going to the doctor.
Avoiding what bothers you works instantly. However, it also reinforces the belief that you are unable to solve these problems, making you even more afraid of facing them in the future. There is simply no way for you to know that you can handle it all on your own. You have no chance to disprove your negative beliefs.
6. You stun yourself with alcohol, drugs and food
Anxiety and depression are caused by the abuse of alcohol, drugs and food. If you're worried about losing your job, you overeat and drink a lot to calm down. If you're worried about getting pissed at a party, you can always "take a couple of drinks" to "relax."
Suppression of anxiety through drugs, alcohol or food indicates that you do not know how to deal with your anxieties and emotions.
You do not reflect, do not try to figure out how much your prejudices correspond to the truth.
The advantages of suppression and avoidance are that they work instantly and are easily accessible
And no consequences - for the next couple of hours. You will not feel bad until late, you will have a hangover tomorrow, you can enjoy drugs and not think about life in the real world, because your motivation and ambition have decreased significantly. However, you still do not resolve the existing issues. As a result, you will have two problems - anxiety and self-destructive behavior.
7. You suffer from "overpreparation syndrome"
You are nervous about having to give a report next week. Although you know that you are competent and have deep knowledge on the topic, you are nevertheless disturbed by the thought: “What if everything goes out of my head?”, “What if someone asks a question that I can’t answer?” .
You think through the speech down to the last word, and when the time is right, you get up and read the speech... but you are so boring! You sound like a robot. People think: "That's a bore!" And you were worried that if you were even a little spontaneous, you would certainly forget something and go astray.
Excessive preparation reinforces the belief that you must be in complete control of what worries you, otherwise disaster will occur focusing on a feeling like "I think I know this stuff."
The speakers who liked the audience the least prepared the most. Overpreparation does not help, because it is impossible to prepare for everything in the same way: something unexpected can always happen.
8. You use safe behavior
When we are anxious or afraid, we use “safe behavior” – “rituals” that make us feel safe even for a moment. People often don't think about their rituals until others point them out and ask them to stop.
For example, a person who is afraid to drive on a bridge performs the following rituals for safety: plans the path so that he knows exactly where the bridge awaits him, tries not to look over the edge of the bridge, drives in traffic lanes, does not look in the rear-view mirror, squeezes steering wheel, take a deep breath and slam on the brakes. Each of these aspects of safe behavior gives him a sense of control over the situation. In fact, this only reinforces his belief that he is not capable of controlling her.
The use of rituals convinces you that you cannot manage on your own, that this situation will remain dangerous and problematic unless you "protect" yourself with some action. As soon as you stop practicing them, you will start doing what you are afraid of, and you will understand that in fact, everything is in order without these “rituals”.
9. You are always trying to make a good impression
Perhaps you are worried about how you look or that you will say something inappropriate.
You worry that people will notice your restlessness, insecurity, and awkwardness and judge you. You reason like this: "If I don't make a really good impression in every way, everyone will think I'm a failure."
Most neurotics grew up without warm affection from their parents, but with the need to be guided by the thoughts and feelings of other people and with the obligation to please them. As a result, a person is never sure that he can like, that relations with him will be maintained.
You are too focused on being nice to everyone. You are constantly trying to guess what others think. Believing that you must always “make an incredible impression on people,” you expect the most harsh criticism - and accordingly worry.
10. You meditate by thinking over and over again
When you meditate on something that is disturbing, you “chew” it many times like a cow chews its cud. You hope that if you keep thinking, you will find a solution, feel better, and stop thinking accordingly.
Belief in the usefulness of reflection is absolutely false. The awareness of how bad you feel only gets stronger because you focus on the negative emotions.
It makes you avoid positive feelings, as if you refuse to change your attitude to the situation or find any advantages in it. Fruitless reflections are the eternal "chewing" of reality that you cannot swallow.
11. You Need Total Confidence
It may seem that gaining confidence right now will make you less nervous. But even if you finally believe that the situation is as it seems to you and start looking for the perfect solution to the problem, you will soon realize that it is not ideal - and you will start to get nervous again. As you search for confidence and the perfect solution, anxiety grows. In reality, anything can happen. Living with uncertainty means living in the real world.
12. You refuse to accept the existence of your "crazy" thoughts
Many people worry about thoughts that seem to them completely contrary to their character and beliefs.
Almost everyone talks about "crazy" thoughts - disgusting, immoral or cruel.
People worry about them for several reasons:
see them as an omen of something terrible,
feel ashamed and guilty,
think they should get rid of them immediately.
For example, people with panic disorder fear that the thought of a panic attack indicates that one is about to happen. OCD sufferers believe that the thought of losing control predicts that they will behave violently, lose control of themselves. Neurotics also tend to believe that their thoughts will inevitably lead to actions.
It's helpful to ask yourself, "How many times have I had 'crazy' thoughts?" and “How many times have these predictions actually come true?”
Obsessive-compulsive disorder research indicates that almost 30% have real obsessions, unwanted thoughts, urges that do not affect behavior in any way.
Thinking about something is not the embodiment of what you thought about.
Many people who think about cruel and bad deeds believe that having these thoughts makes them immoral, disgusting, corrupt. Character and sanity, however, are not determined by your thoughts - they are determined by what you actually do.
For example, if you have images of violence in your mind, ask yourself: Are you the abuser in these scenes? Not? So these images have nothing to do with your character. And to fight them - instead of acknowledging their existence - means only to increase your own anxiety. How to replace all of the above false strategies? What steps in working with anxiety will be truly effective?
About the author: Robert Leahy is a psychotherapist, one of the world leaders in cognitive behavioral therapy, and author of The Cure for Nerves: How to Stop Worrying and Enjoy Life.
Text: Maria Fedotova Photo Source: Unsplash
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