Why do men like to give oral

9 Reasons Guys Love Giving You Oral

It has come to my attention that there is a terrible rumor going around about men: that we're selfish in bed. Hey, I'll admit, there's not a man I know who will decline oral sex from a woman he fancies. I mean, it's a blowjob! It's one of the all-time greatest discoveries—just ahead of Columbus finding America. Still, I take issue with this rumor. Because as much as men like to receive, we also love to give. If it's not already obvious why, let me explain:

It Extends The Pleasure
The penetration part of sex generally only lasts a few minutes. I didn't make this up. There is actual research on this (and even stats on which state lasts the longest in bed). So a fella's best hope for marathon sex—or you know, sex that lasts longer than a commercial break—is to dedicate a little a time to you alone.

Do you know what sex toys used to look like?

…And Increases Our Odds of a Dual Climax
If there were a race toward orgasm, men would win every time. But it's not a race—sex is a team sport. And getting you revved up before the main event makes it a little more likely that we'll get to cross the finish line together.

MORE: 8 Ways to Spice Up Oral Sex

The Feeling of Your Fingers in Our Hair
The sexy scalp massage we get when we're doing our thing is definitely a bonus. Our scalps are covered with nerve endings that rarely receive attention, and you're really the only person we want going to town up there. (We'd rather eat a set of shears than ask our barber for a scalp massage.) So don't be afraid to get in there—a little tugging isn't bad, either.

We Get to Slow Down and Appreciate Your Body
Every guy has his own pet spots on your body. They're the curves and angles that are fully sexualized in his mind, even though you've never given them much though. Maybe it's the sloping arch of your back, the smooth skin beneath your belly button, or the way your hip bone moves flirtatiously beneath your skin. From this vantage point, we really get to take it all in.

One Word: Underboob
Imagine you're in our position. Now look up. Not a bad view, right?

MORE: "Can I Ask a Guy to Go Down On Me?"

It's a Hell of a Lot More Fun Than a Foot Rub
Believe it or not, we like making you feel good. So if you ask for a foot rub or a back massage, we'll give it to you. But will a foot rub or back massage get you off? Probably not. The truth is, guys love it when you orgasm, and with oral sex, the odds are in our favor.

We Can Focus on What Matters
We know we have the tendency to ignore your clitoris during intercourse, and we definitely want to apologize about that—we know the C-spot is pretty crucial for orgasm. But man that thing is tiny! It's like trying to hit a quarter-inch target while being distracted by the rest of your naked body. With oral sex, we have an unobstructed, distraction-free opportunity to make it up to you, and we're up to the task.

It Strengthens Our Connection
Nothing is as intimate as oral sex—not even intercourse. And when you open yourself up to us like that, we feel insanely close to you—both physically and emotionally.

Because…Sexual Karma
It's not like we expect reciprocation—we absolutely don't—but it's one of life's great truisms that the more one gives, the more one receives. So whether we get the favor returned immediately, another night, or never, we know that pleasing you is putting out good sex vibes. Plus, getting you all revved up means there's a pretty good chance something awesome is about to happen next. And who wouldn't be happy about that?

MORE: How to Have More Oral Sex

Clint Carter

Clint Carter is a reporter and editor with a magazine journalism degree from the University of Missouri.

11 Men Sound Off on Why It's Empowering to Give Oral Sex

At a certain point in their sex lives, many straight men have a critical realization: Vaginas aren't gross. Neither is cunnilingus.

In fact, contrary to stereotypes that most straight men hate going down on ladies, for many men giving oral sex is just as good as getting it. According to data from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, a majority of millennial men reported having performed oral sex on their female partners in the past year — and it wasn't just for reciprocity's sake.

Debby Herbenick, one of the survey's researchers and an associate professor at Indiana University, told Mic that "the vast majority" of young men enjoy cunnilingus quite a lot. "In new, not-yet-published data from a recent college student survey I conducted, 64% said [they enjoyed performing oral sex] 'very much' and 24% said 'somewhat,'" Herbenick said.

Men's reasons for loving a little tongue action are manifold, but they mostly stem from the same fundamental (and not totally shocking) truth: Women like being eaten out, making that in itself a worthwhile pursuit. For many especially enthusiastic men, though, cunnilingus is about way more.

Mic asked millennial men why they enjoy performing oral sex on their female partners, whether they think it's important to having a vibrant sex life and whether they think they're any good at going down.

Here's what they had to say.

Mic/Getty Images

Mutual pleasure is the best pleasure.

With age comes maturity, and with maturity comes the knowledge that sex usually just isn't as fun when only one partner gets off. One of the primary reasons men say they love giving oral sex is partly selfish: Making women feel good makes them feel good.

"I only get off if my partner gets off. It's a two-sided coin, and I don't want to have sex to solely get my rocks off. I fully enjoy watching a woman enjoy my skills." — Curtis*, 31

"I think part of it is getting some vicarious pleasure through my partner. Knowing that it's hot for them turns me on, and eventually just the act itself turns me on. I like to imagine what it must feel like. " — Alec*, 24

"The best sex is where both partners give and receive, and both partners take control and take a back seat at different points. I feel like mutual oral sex is a big part of that." — Robert*, 23

Mic/Getty Images

It makes sex more intimate.

Getting up close and personal with a vagina is an extremely intimate act. That intimacy often translates to the rest of a sexual encounter, which can improve a couple's overall chemistry.

"I love [giving oral sex] because it seems to be one of the most pleasurable things you can do for a woman. To hear and feel her reactions from that incredibly intimate point of contact is both bonding and super sexy, for me." — Logan*, 22

"[Going down on a woman] is awesome. Especially when the sexual, physical and spiritual connection is there, it's like two bodies connecting and expanding into a universe of sensation. It's just all around awesome." — Alan*, 33

thegreatamericandisconnect.

blogspot.com

Sometimes, oral sex is the only way women get off.

Many men have learned by now that many women can't orgasm from penetration alone (as few as 7%, according to one estimate). That makes oral sex all the more crucial to a mutually fulfilling sex life.

"[Giving oral sex] is a key piece of being an all around good lover. Some women prefer or need penetration to reach orgasm, but I have found that many prefer cunnilingus and clitoral stimulation to get there." — Simon*, 26

"It really turns me on. I love the actual act of it; the smell, the taste, etc. It's also the most reliable way to make a woman orgasm. Most of the women I've been with said they find it hard or impossible to orgasm purely from sex." — Zachary*, 33

Receiving oral sex can make partners more relaxed and open-minded.

That said, not all men are willing to perform oral sex — which means some millennial women who haven't previously had partners who want to go down might view it as an adventurous new act. Tackling this new adventure can make many women more open to trying other new things during a sexual encounter.

"I notice that sex tends to be more fun — wilder, dirtier, rougher — if I kick things off with cunnilingus." — Martin*, 27

"If you get good at going down on a girl, the sex is more intense. They are more relaxed, which is always good if you want to try other things. I don't know a guy who wouldn't want to have lots of sex with a girl that loved to get off. So help her get off!" — Curtis

"I don't 'give to get' but I do think that being able to pleasure your partner better improves both people's pleasure." — Ricky*, 23

Mic/Getty Images

It gets her in the mood to get down to business.

Cunnilingus before intercourse can significantly improve both partners' experience because, to put it simply, it's better when it's wetter. (Plus, she'll probably be more inclined to reciprocate, if you're into that sort of thing. )

"In a long-term relationship, the sight of your dad bod, which she has seen literally thousands of times, is not going to be enough foreplay to make penetration enjoyable. Cunnilingus goes a long way in bridging the gap between a man's 'instant on' and woman's need to gradually build up to sex." — Christian*, 26

"Nothing has gotten me laid more than going down first, without any goading or suggestion." — Blake*, 28

"There's a noticeable difference in the quality of sex if the order is rip off clothes and go down. I feel like women get so used to dudes just lying back and expecting head that it becomes routine and a little boring, despite it being inherently new and exciting." — Martin

Being good at going down can improve self-esteem.

We all like being good at things. (Remember how awesome it felt to get a gold star on that fourth-grade math test?) That sentiment also applies to sex: Being told how good you are at giving head is a pretty big ego boost.

"Guys generally worry about their dick size or sex skills, and would probably err on the side of caution that they are less than average at both (though they would probably never publicly admit it). If you become good at [giving head], you generally don't have to worry about lacking in the other departments." — Curtis

"I think it's empowering because I take pleasure in knowing my partner is enjoying herself. It's like, right in this moment, I have you completely. I like knowing I can take someone out of her own head. It makes me more confident in what I'm doing and usually means the rest of whatever we're up to will be great." — Martin

*Names have been changed to allow subjects to speak freely on private matters.

This article was originally published on 9.18.2015

Why men love oral sex

For most of their lives, women wonder: why do men love oral sex? And some men themselves claim that women will rule the world if they sufficiently master the art of oral sex. But why is this happening? And is it worth it to regularly deliver such pleasure to your man? Some argue that every self-respecting woman should do this on a regular basis. However, some still believe that only bad girls do it. So, why do men enjoy oral sex so much that they even agree to trust women to run the world? nine0003

Video of the day

Feel good

During the performance of the art of oral sex, a man feels very good. Around his penis is a wet, warm and persistent mouth that literally makes a man's blood boil. According to many men, such sensations cannot be experienced during normal sex. And all thanks to the action of the language. Indeed, during oral sex, tongue, lips, teeth, and hands take part. And with this combination it is very difficult to compete. nine0003

No stress

Oral sex for a man is almost stress-free. Unlike conventional sex, where they have to worry about whether it is big enough, whether the intercourse lasts long enough and whether the partner is satisfied, the art of oral sex is that all fears and complexes of a man are suppressed. He can literally relax and enjoy knowing that the orgasm will come at the right time, no matter how soon it happens. Everything is too simple and primitive, just like men like. nine0003

Secret desires

The art of oral sex reveals a hidden craving for voyeurism in men. That is, if from the side it is impossible to observe the usual sexual intercourse (unless the room is equipped with all the necessary video recording devices), then now you can watch everything, as they say, from the front rows. During oral sex, a man has a unique opportunity to visually experience the magic of intimacy. A man watches how hard a girl “works”, and this is what brings him incomparable pleasure for the most part. It's like being in a little porn movie. nine0003

Without obligation

As you know, after oral sex it is impossible to get pregnant. So oral sex is purely recreation, and no obligations or problems. Its purpose is to enjoy, not offspring. In other words, this is a great opportunity to have a wonderful time without thinking about the risk of age or financial responsibility. At least that's what men think. This is a kind of orgasm without a price tag.

Selflessness

Another thing that turns men on is that oral sex is a completely selfless display of feelings. The partner "serves" her man without demanding anything in return for a real oral sex moment. So, this is a true manifestation of love. And, in turn, there is nothing better that can make a man feel so good. And why shouldn't they like it?

Obligation or mutual desire

No matter how pleasant it is for a man, a woman should not constantly give a man exclusively oral pleasure. This can relax him, and in the meantime, she herself will not get any pleasure. This is not normal sexual relations. After all, sex implies, first of all, the satisfaction of both partners. Thus, oral sex should become a kind of variety of the usual everyday sexual life, and not an obligatory attribute, a kind of duty that a woman bears. nine0003

Why do men like oral sex?

A robber in a balaclava enters the bank. Points
pistol at the cashier. She shoves money at him, and he
says: “Take away the loot, but quickly suck!” and
slips the tool through the window.
The cashier gets down to business, and the robber to her:
— And just like at home, my head hurts right away! © Anecdote

This, of course, is not about sexual minorities, who probably love this kind of sex for the same reason that some women love it, but about the sexual majority. nine0003

For most of their lives, women ask themselves: why do men like oral sex? And some men themselves claim that women will rule the world if they sufficiently master the art of oral sex. But why is this happening? And is it worth it to regularly deliver such pleasure to your man? Some argue that every self-respecting woman should do this on a regular basis. However, some still believe that only bad girls do it. So, why do men enjoy oral sex so much that they even agree to trust women to run the world? nine0046 Pleasant sensations

No stress

Secret desires

The art of oral sex reveals a man's latent craving for voyeurism. That is, if from the side it is impossible to observe the usual sexual intercourse (unless the room is equipped with all the necessary video recording devices), then now you can watch everything, as they say, from the front rows. During oral sex, a man has a unique opportunity to visually experience the magic of intimacy. A man watches how hard a girl “works”, and this is what brings him incomparable pleasure for the most part. It's like being in a little porn movie. nine0003

Without obligation

As you know, it is impossible to get pregnant after oral sex. So oral sex is purely recreation, and no obligations or problems. Its purpose is to enjoy, not offspring. In other words, this is a great opportunity to have a wonderful time without thinking about the risk of age or financial responsibility. At least that's what men think. This is a kind of orgasm without a price tag.

Selflessness

Another thing that turns men on is that oral sex is a completely selfless act of feeling. The partner “serves” her man without demanding anything at the moment in return. So, this is a true manifestation of love. And, in turn, there is nothing better that can make a man feel so good. And why shouldn't they like it?
Obligation or mutual desire

No matter how pleasant it may be for a man, a woman should not constantly give a man exclusively oral pleasure.

Learn more