Why do i think bad thoughts
Intrusive Thoughts: What Are They?
Written by Shishira Sreenivas
In this Article
- Types of Intrusive Thoughts
- What You Can Do
- Possible Mental Health Disorders to Watch For
- When to Get Help
Have you ever had an unwanted thought or image get stuck in your head? Usually you can ignore it and move on. But sometimes, it just keeps popping right back up.
You don’t want to have these sticky, uncomfortable thoughts. So why do they happen to you? They're called “intrusive thoughts” and nearly everyone has them from time to time. They can range from random images to disturbing and violent ideas like punching someone in the face or hurting yourself.
They're usually harmless. But if you obsess about them so much that it interrupts your day-to-day life, this can be a sign of an underlying mental health problem. Intrusive thoughts can be a symptom of anxiety, depression, or obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).
Types of Intrusive Thoughts
Intrusive thoughts can come in many forms. Here are a few of them:
Sexual thoughts. It’s natural to often have sexual thoughts, no matter your gender. When you feel uncomfortable with or shocked by such thoughts, you may fixate on them and try hard to push them away. Experts say it’s best to remind yourself that these are just passing, automatic thoughts. They don’t define you in any way.
Violent thoughts. Your thoughts may have dark or violent themes like hurting yourself or someone else. Often, they're just harmless, repetitive thoughts that you have no intention of acting on. You don’t even want them in your head. And they'll pass in time. But if you find yourself planning to follow through on your aggressive thoughts, you need professional help to manage your emotions. Talk to a doctor or a therapist.
Negative thoughts. Sometimes, when things don’t work out as planned, you might think of yourself as a “loser” or feel you’re not good enough. These thoughts should fade as your situation changes.
But if they become overwhelming, you could have depression or anxiety. Talk to a mental health professional about how to control your symptoms.
Other types of intrusive thoughts. You can also have bizarre, weird, or paranoid thoughts that are basically "junk" thoughts. You have no control over them, and most of the time, they have no meaning or relevance in your life. It’s best not to take them personally or pay much attention to them. But if they last for a long time, or you keep having episodes of them, talk to your doctor to rule out an underlying mental disorder.
What You Can Do
At the end of the day, most intrusive thoughts are just thoughts. They're not a red flag, or a signal that you actually want to do the disturbing things you're thinking about. If they bother you, you can take steps to cut down on their frequency and intensity.
You can:
- Recognize and label them for what they are -- intrusive thoughts that you can’t control.
- Just let them linger, instead of trying to push them away.
- Accept that they will pass eventually.
- Give yourself time for them to fade away.
- Prepare yourself for unwanted thoughts to come back.
- Continue to do whatever you were doing when the intrusive thoughts flooded your head.
Don’t:
- Act or engage with these random, repetitive thoughts.
- Try to question why you’re having them in the first place.
- Look for meaning behind them.
- Suppress them. If you do this, you may fixate more on them.
This can be hard to do. But over time, being less sensitive to intrusive thoughts can reduce the emotional effect they may have on you. It also helps you feel more in control of them.
Possible Mental Health Disorders to Watch For
Sometimes, thoughts go beyond being intrusive.
Unwanted, repetitive thoughts could be a sign of OCD. With this type of anxiety disorder, you have recurring, unwanted thoughts you can’t control.
You may also have the urge to repeat certain behaviors or actions over and over again.
Delusional thoughts, like thinking someone is always watching you or wants to hurt you, can be a sign of schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. If you have these thoughts, talk to a psychiatrist for diagnosis and treatment options.
All these disorders can be treated with medications, behavioral therapy, or a combination of the two.
When to Get Help
If intrusive thoughts consume your energy, cause you distress, or make it hard to go about your day, tell your doctor about them. If necessary, they'll refer you to a behavioral therapist, psychologist, social worker, or psychiatrist for further diagnosis and treatment.
If you feel like acting on your intrusive thoughts them in a way that could cause harm to yourself or someone else, get medical help right away.
If you’re thinking of hurting yourself, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-TALK. Or also text “MHA” to 741-741.
This will connect you to a trained counselor from the Crisis Text Line.
My Disturbing Thoughts Won’t Go Away. What Do I Do?
Let’s talk about intrusive thoughts.
Share on PinterestDesign by Alexis Lira | Illustration by Ruth BasagoitiaHi Sam, I’ve been having some disturbing, awful thoughts that I just feel so hopeless about. I haven’t told my therapist, though, because I’m so ashamed of them.
Some of them are sexual in nature, which I can’t even imagine telling another person, and some of them are violent (I swear, I’d never act on them, but the content makes me feel like I must be going insane). I feel like I’m at the end of my rope.
What do I do?
First thing’s first: Thank you for asking such a brave question.
I know it wasn’t an easy thing to do, but I’m so glad you did it anyway. You’ve already taken the first step (which is cliché, but in this case, really important to remember).
I’m going to challenge you to consider that, no matter how horrifying your thoughts are, you still deserve support.
You could have the ugliest, most unhinged thoughts in the entire world and that wouldn’t change the fact that a mental health provider still owes you compassionate, nonjudgmental, and competent care.
You probably get that logically, but it’s the emotional piece that’s much harder to deal with. And I get it. You know why I get it? Because I’ve been in your exact situation before.
Before I was properly diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder, I used to have a whole flurry of thoughts that scared the sh*t out of me. I thought about killing my cat or my partner. I thought about pushing people in front of trains. I even went through a period of time where I became petrified of abusing children.
If you can picture it, it started to feel like a really sh*tty version of mental dodgeball. Except, instead of balls, it was images of me literally choking my cat.
“My God, Sam,” you might be thinking, “Why are you admitting this in an advice column?!”
But it’s totally okay.
You heard me right: It’s okay to have thoughts like these.
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To be clear, it’s not okay if these thoughts are distressing, and it’s definitely not okay that you find yourself at the end of your rope.
But disturbing thoughts in general? Believe it or not, everyone has them.
The difference is, for some people (like me, and I strongly suspect you as well), we don’t disregard them as weird and move on with our day. We obsess about them and worry that they might be saying something bigger about us.
In that case, what we’re talking about here are “intrusive thoughts” which are recurring, unwanted, and often disturbing thoughts or images that cause distress.
These often occur in people who have obsessive-compulsive disorder. Some common examples:
- fear of purposefully hurting loved ones (assaulting or killing them) or yourself
- fear of accidentally harming loved ones (burning down the house, poisoning someone, exposing them to illness) or yourself
- worrying that you’ll run over someone with a vehicle or that you did
- fear of molesting or abusing a child
- fear of having a sexual orientation other than the one you identify with (so if you’re straight, a fear of being gay; if you’re gay, a fear of being straight)
- fear of having a gender identity other than the one you identify with (so if you’re cisgender, a fear of actually being transgender; if you’re transgender, a fear that you might actually be cisgender)
- fear that you don’t actually love your partner or that they aren’t the “right” person
- fear that you might shout expletives or slurs, or that you said something inappropriate
- recurring thoughts that you consider sinful or blasphemous (like wanting to worship Satan, or sexualizing saints or religious figures)
- recurring thoughts that you aren’t living in accordance with your moral or ethical values
- recurring thoughts about the nature of reality or existence (basically, one long, drawn out existential crisis)
The OCD Center of Los Angeles has a crucial resource outlining all these forms of OCD and more that I’d highly recommend taking a look at.
Every single person has disturbing thoughts, so in that way, obsessive-compulsive disorder isn’t a disorder of “difference” — it’s the degree to which these thoughts impact someone’s life.
From the sound of it, these thoughts that you’re having are definitely impacting you, which means it’s time to reach out for professional help. The good news? (Yes, there’s good news!) I can pretty much guarantee you that your therapist has heard it all before.
Whatever terrible, dreadful thing that keeps popping up in your brain is, in all likelihood, not going to be shocking to your clinicians.
They studied it in graduate school, they’ve talked about it with other clients, and more than likely, they’ve had a few bizarre thoughts themselves (after all, they’re human beings, too!).
It’s also their job to be professional grownups who can handle anything you throw at them.
Still, if you aren’t sure how to bring it up to your clinicians, this is my tried and true advice for what will be, no doubt, the most awkward conversation of your life:
1.
Practice on your own firstWriting a script and rehearsing it in the shower or car is how I psyched myself up the first time — while vacuuming is also a good way to do this if you don’t want to be heard.
“I know this sounds ridiculous, but…” “I feel so terrible and ashamed about this, but…” were starters that helped me figure out what words I wanted to say.
2. Maybe don’t say it at all
I’ve known people who have written their intrusive thoughts down, and then handed that piece of paper to their therapist or psychiatrist.
For example: “I’m not comfortable saying this to you, but I felt you needed to know I was struggling with this, so I wrote something down for you to read.” I did this with my psychiatrist once, and when he was done reading, he shrugged and joked, “Good to know. You can burn it now, if you want, I can take it from here.”
3. Test the waters first
It’s perfectly fine to speak in hypotheticals if you’re not ready yet. This is a way of assessing the kind of reaction you can expect from your clinician, and easing yourself into it.
For example: “Can I pose a hypothetical question? If a client of yours reported having some intrusive thoughts that they were very ashamed of, how would you handle that conversation?”
4. Let them ask the questions
Sometimes it can feel safer to dive into these conversations if your clinician is taking the lead. You can always ask, “I’m worried I might have OCD, and I was wondering if you could give me more information about intrusive thoughts in particular.”
5. Lean on other resources
There’s an incredible book that I read, “The Imp of the Mind,” that I honestly feel should be required reading for anyone struggling with thoughts like these.
If you aren’t sure how to open up, I’d recommend reading this book and highlighting any passages that feel relevant to you. You can also do this with online resources, like the articles you’d find at the OCD Center of Los Angeles.
6. Seek out a different clinician
If you’re really not comfortable talking to your therapist, it might also point to a need to switch therapists.
Not every clinician knows a whole lot about OCD, either, so it might be time to seek out a better fit.
I talk about this more in another Healthline article, which you can read here.
7. Try online therapy!
If talking to someone face-to-face is truly a barrier that’s impeding your ability to get help, trying another therapy format could be the solution.
I wrote about my own experiences with online therapy here (in short? it was life-changing).
8. Place a bet
If your brain is anything like mine, you might be thinking, “But Sam, how do I KNOW this is an intrusive thought and I’m not just like, a psychopath?” Ha, friend, I know that script by heart. I’m a veteran of this game.
One reframe that helps me is to imagine that someone breaks into my apartment, holds a gun to my head, and says, “If you don’t answer this question correctly, I’ll shoot you. Are you actually going to kill your cat? [or whatever your equivalent fear is].” (Yeah, yeah, it’s a very violent scenario, but the stakes are important here.
)
Nine times out of ten? If push came to shove, and we had no choice but to take our best guess, the logical part of our brain knows the difference between an intrusive thought and a legitimate danger.
And even if you’re still not sure, that’s okay, too. Life itself is full of uncertainty. It’s not your job to figure this out — leave it to the professionals.
Listen: You deserve to feel better than this. And it sounds to me like you’re going to need some help in order to get there.
Your brain is being so rude and so unfair, and I’m really sorry about that. My brain is a real jerk sometimes, too, so I understand the agonizing frustration that comes with this territory.
While I know it’s such an uncomfortable thing to talk about, I do want to assure you that it’s totally worth it.
Each time you open up and get (very, very) honest about how you’re struggling, that gives your clinicians the information they need to support you. Even better, it starts to take the power away from those thoughts, because the shame is no longer keeping you imprisoned in your own mind.
Besides, the cool thing about mental health professionals? They’re sworn to secrecy (like, legally) and if you never want to see them again? You don’t have to. As far as spilling awful secrets goes, the risk here is relatively low.
You also pay their bills. So by all means, demand your money’s worth!
I won’t pretend that it’s easy, but as they say, the truth will set you free. Maybe not right away, because few things in mental health are immediately gratifying, but yes, with time this will get better.
And who knows, maybe you’ll wind up broadcasting it on the internet to millions of people, too (I never could have imagined that for myself, but that’s the magic of recovery — you might surprise yourself).
You got this. Promise.
Sam
Sam Dylan Finch is a writer and content strategist based in Seattle, WA. You can say hello on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, or learn more at SamDylanFinch.com.
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Why Terrible Thoughts Come to Our Heads - T&P
It's good that there is no mind reader yet, otherwise any of us would be caught red-handed. After all, even the most meek and delicate person can sometimes rejoice at the failure of his neighbor or feel a desire to crush someone's head. Why do respectable citizens watch dismembered thrillers with pleasure, while ardent liberals sometimes catch themselves in xenophobia? And is it possible to prevent such "thought crimes"? Jena Pincott wrote about it on Psychology Today, and T&P translated the main points.
Each of us sometimes catches ourselves thinking wrong, frightening or vile thoughts. To bend over a cute baby and suddenly think: "I can easily crush his skull." Comfort a friend who has experienced a collapse in his personal life, and secretly savor the humiliating details of his story. Ride with relatives in a car and imagine in detail how you lose control and drive into the oncoming lane.
The more persistently we try to distract ourselves from these ideas, the more intrusive they become and the worse we feel. This is not easy to admit, but we do enjoy primitive thrills and other people's misfortune. People have amazingly little control over their own black thoughts: we have no control over their duration or content.
In his famous experiment in the 1980s, Eric Klinger asked volunteers to write down their thoughts for a week each time a special device beeped. The scientist found that during a 16-hour day a person is visited by about 500 unintentional and obsessive ideas, lasting an average of 14 seconds. Although most of the time our attention is occupied with everyday affairs, 18% of the total number of thoughts cause discomfort to a person and are marked as bad, evil and politically incorrect. And another 13% can be described as completely unacceptable, dangerous or shocking - these are, for example, thoughts of murder and perversion.
The Swiss psychoanalyst Carl Jung was one of the first to become seriously interested in black thoughts.
In his Psychology of the Unconscious (1912), he described the shadow side of the personality, the seat of sinful desires and animal instincts that we usually repress.
How is the dark side of personality formed? From the point of view of neuroscience, some of the cognitive processes form the "I" with which we are used to identify ourselves - prudent, normal, logical - while other processes serve as an impetus for the development of a dark, irrational consciousness, where obsessive images and ideas are born.
According to Klinger's theory, an ancient preconscious mechanism in our brain is constantly looking for potential sources of danger in the world around us. Information about them, bypassing consciousness, is transmitted in the form of emotional signals, which cause unwanted thoughts. Neuroscientist Sam Harris believes that these thoughts are random and completely uncontrollable: although a person is conscious, he cannot completely control his mental life.
Dark and frightening thoughts
"This is disgusting, show me more"
People are embarrassed to admit that they are attracted to sinister and vile stories: it is considered that this is the lot of freaks and perverts.
Fans of bloody thrillers, photo compilations with car accident victims or alcoholized embryos have a reduced ability to empathize. Thirty years ago, University of Delaware professor Marvin Zuckerman determined that some people are more thrill-hungry than others. When confronted with something abnormal and terrible, people with this type of personality are more excited - this can be established by measuring electrodermic activity.
Cravings for unhealthy and creepy things can also be beneficial. As psychologist Eric Wilson argues, thinking about the suffering of others allows us to neutralize destructive emotions without harming ourselves or others. They can even lead to a state of awe: “I can feel the value of my own life in a new way,” writes Wilson, “because I myself and my family are alive and well!”
Thoughts of sexual perversion
"Don't open at work... and nowhere at all"
Many of us find sexual taboo thoughts to be the most disgusting thoughts: there is nothing worse than catching ourselves in a fantasy about something immoral or illegal.
The good news is that a little excitement doesn't mean anything. Clinical psychologist Lee Baer, a professor at Harvard Medical School, argues that arousal is the body's natural response to attention: "Try thinking about your genitals and convincing yourself that you don't feel anything." If the thought of rape or sex with a minor flashed through your mind, this does not mean at all that you are going to bring this idea to life. All people think about sex, but not all fantasies should be taken literally.
Women's erotic fantasies of submission and rape have their own logical explanation. University of North Texas researchers found that 57% of women have ever felt aroused by fantasizing about forced sexual intercourse with themselves as the victim. This can be explained by the desire of a woman to be desired - so much so that a man cannot control himself. Another explanation is a surge of endorphins, which enter the bloodstream more actively due to an accelerated heartbeat that accompanies a feeling of fear and disgust. The imaginary situation of coercion allows you to give freedom to secret "evil" desires without feeling guilty. Rape fantasies, which remain under the reliable control of our consciousness, have nothing to do with the desire to be raped in real life.
Politically incorrect thoughts
"If they know what I'm thinking, they'll hate me"
Hateful voice in your head that turns on when "another" appears in your field of attention - be it a person in a wheelchair, a woman in a veil , a brightly dressed transsexual or a foreigner with an unusual skin color. This voice, which you do your best to muffle, calls into question the adequacy, behavior, abilities and, in general, the presence of human qualities in "others".
Mark Schaller, a psychologist at the University of British Columbia, believes that such thoughts are caused by a primitive defense mechanism that formed at the dawn of mankind, when outsiders were by definition a source of threat. The mechanism of "psychological immunity", however, does not justify modern manifestations of intolerance - fat-shaming, xenophobia, religious prejudice or homophobia.
The good news is that automatically occurring politically incorrect thoughts can be overcome: psychologists advise you to stop thinking about how polite and open-minded others think you are, and concentrate on the personality of the person with whom you communicate.
Malevolent thoughts
“Your failure is my joy”
When we hear on the news that a girl has been caught drunk driving and arrested, we are not touched. But if that girl turns out to be Paris Hilton, we feel a strange, malicious satisfaction that the Germans call "shadenfreude" (literally, "joy at harm").
Australian psychologist Norman Feather (Flinders University) proved that we are more pleased with the failure of someone outstanding than the failure of a person of our equal status. When successful people fail, we feel smarter, more insightful, and more confident.
Perhaps this is how our inner desire for justice manifests itself. But where does the feeling of shame come from? According to Professor Richard Smith, author of The Joy of Pain, it makes no sense to beat yourself up for this banal emotional reaction.
To overcome an attack of gloating, you need to imagine yourself in the place of the victim or concentrate on your own achievements and virtues, because the best antidote to envy is gratitude.
Cruel and bloodthirsty thoughts
“If I had a chainsaw now…”
You are calmly cutting onions in your kitchen, and suddenly the thought flashes through your head: “What if I slaughter my wife?” If thoughts of murder were considered a crime, most of us would be found guilty. According to psychologist David Bass (University of Texas at Austin), 91% of men and 84% of women have ever imagined themselves pushing a person off a platform, strangling their partner with a pillow, or brutally beating a family member.
The researcher offered a radical explanation: because our ancestors killed to survive, they passed on to us a predisposition to kill at the gene level. Our subconscious always stores information about murder as a possible way to solve problems related to stress, power, limited resources and security threats.
However, in most cases, thoughts of violence do not precede actual violence, but, on the contrary, block it. The heartbreaking pictures that the brain paints make us analyze the situation before we act. The scenario plays out in the imagination, the prefrontal cortex turns on, and the eerie thought disappears.
But what happens to dark thoughts when we suppress them?
The Hydra's Dilemma
"The Method of Radical Acceptance..."
The thoughts we try to suppress become intrusive. This is reminiscent of the battle with the Lernaean Hydra: instead of a severed head, new ones grow back. When we try not to think about something, we only think about it. The brain constantly checks itself for the presence of a forbidden thought, and it pops up again and again in the mind, while feelings of shame and self-loathing distract us and weaken our willpower.
Depression and stress can aggravate the painful process of suppression. The more effort we spend on fighting the obsession, the more time we need to recover and rest.
For people with obsessive-compulsive disorder, dealing with unwanted thoughts can take several hours a day. None of us can fully control our minds. As Carl Jung wrote, we do not control the shadow "I", we do not create dark thoughts and desires of our own free will - which means that we cannot prevent their appearance either.
Dr. Baer recommends the Buddhist method of radical acceptance: when an undesirable idea arises, one should try to perceive it as just a thought, without deep meaning and hidden meaning. No need to condemn yourself or resist - just let the thought go. If she comes back, repeat again.
Another way to let go of an obsession is to write it down on paper and destroy it. This helps to distance oneself from an unpleasant thought, and then literally get rid of it. The “door effect” can also work - physically moving to another room helps the brain switch to a new topic and reset short-term memories. For difficult cases, there is a radical approach: do not let go of frightening thoughts, but, on the contrary, play them out in your imagination in full detail.
What is really important in dark thoughts? The value we give to them. We can perceive unpleasant thoughts as valuable objects for investigation - clues that the shadow self gives us. By analyzing its manifestations, we better understand others and ourselves. A gloomy, vile and uncomfortable thought becomes a source of inspiration. As Eric Wilson writes, imaginative people can turn destructive ideas into fuel for mental and emotional development.
The father of analytical psychology, Carl Jung, kept a diary, which was subsequently published under the title "Red Book". In his diary, Jung recorded disturbing images and ideas from the unconscious, including his encounter with the metaphorical Red Rider. The presence of the Horseman is unpleasant for Jung, but the researcher enters into a dialogue with the stranger: they talk, argue and even dance. After that, the scientist experiences an extraordinary surge of joy, feels agreement with himself and the world. "I'm sure this red man was the devil," writes Jung, "but it was my own devil.
"
Icons: 1) Marek Polakovic, 2), 3) Luis Prado, 4) Zlatko Najdenovski, 5) Liliane Lass Erbe, 6) Studio Fibonacci — from the Noun Project.
reasons and what to do about it
Our author Antonina Kozlova talks about why each of us sometimes has absolutely terrible thoughts. And about whether this is normal or not.
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How to get rid of bad thoughts in your head
Don't self-medicate! In our articles, we collect the latest scientific data and the opinions of authoritative health experts. But remember: only a doctor can diagnose and prescribe treatment.
There is no limit to human capabilities, comics teach us.
What kind of superheroes were not invented by their authors! My favorites are Squirrel Girl and Door Man. The first one wears a tail and controls red rodents, the second one can teleport... into the next room. Probably, these two heroes were the last to come to the superpower store, on the day of the total sale. But they are still lucky. Could, for example, learn to read minds. And this is much worse than hordes of rabid squirrels! At least those can be occupied with nuts.
Don't even think about it!
I used to make the same mistake on dates - during a pause in a conversation, I asked a man the question: “What are you thinking about?” Here it is necessary to clarify right away that I have a round, open face and an attentive look of a person who often interviews, so many times in a row I ran into honesty and received the following answers: “About how “plunger” would be in English. Shit-chpokker?"
"About whether women epilate nose hair.
" "About why my wife bought a three-meter pillow." I didn't take offense and didn't teleport anywhere. It happens. I myself have a lot of different thoughts in my head. There are stupid ones, there are heavy ones, and there are completely terrible ones. So terrible that you drive them out, and then you sit and tremble, afraid that they will return. These thoughts should not be shared - with anyone, ever. And I thought about not submitting this article or asking the editor to sketch some places in it in black, like in secret documents.
For example, at the age of five I wanted to sell my sister Zh. into slavery: I heard on TV that this happens and that they give money for it, and then I wanted a new Barbie with bending legs.
“Can you imagine, I was thinking of exchanging you for a doll,” I obeyed Sister J. “Are you offended?
- Not at all. I really wanted to kill you, - Zh. answered cheerfully. - I would have got my parents alone. I dreamed that you would step on the manhole cover and fall into the abyss.
The family remembrance evening took the form of a bloody confession.
- And as a child, I imagined that hooligans attacked dad in the gateway and killed him, but everyone took pity on us, and we walked with mournful faces.
- And I recently re-read the "Colored Tape" and thought about launching snakes into the ventilation to bite the neighbors, who are disturbed by the clatter of my laptop keys.
- And in the early stages of pregnancy, I was frightened by the scale of the event and secretly hoped for a miscarriage.
- And just a week ago I was visiting my mother and thinking: a good apartment, I will get ...
Zh. and I took a breath. Wow cute horror girls!
– Why do we have so much horror in us? Okay in childhood, but now? I asked in a whisper.
“I think it’s brain tricks,” J. answered calmly. “He tells us the simplest ways to get what we want.” And it is up to us to decide whether to take advice or choose the side of good.
Magic problem
I didn’t know whether to believe the man who dreamed of killing me as a child, and decided to listen
specialist. “Such thoughts sometimes come to all of us, even to me,” Nelli Yakimova, my favorite psychologist-consultant, tried to reassure me. - I remember when this first happened to me: I was five years old, I broke a thermometer and learned from my grandmother that mercury is poisonous. The next day, pouring water into a cup, I thought: "And if you add balls of mercury here, it will become poisoned?" And I imagined myself treating my grandmother or little sister with poisonous water. Of course, I did not experiment with dangerous substances, but for a long time I was afraid that my thoughts would materialize, and considered myself a bad person. This was a manifestation of children's magical thinking. Now I am far from it and I know for sure that fantasies, even the most bloodthirsty ones, cannot harm anyone.
Except, perhaps, their author.' Magical thinking!0115 in it? That is, in our sincere conviction that our thoughts and words can influence reality and change it? After all, many of us are not ready to part with this type of thinking either at 30, or at 50, or at 101.
We are tormented by all sorts of “What if!”, we are waiting for punishment, we consider ourselves magicians and rulers, and our thoughts are magical and material. So, one has only to assume that something is outside our
competencies - and you can safely live on and think whatever your heart desires.
Shadows disappear
But still, where do good people get “bad” thoughts from? “I tend to see them as a signal from the unconscious, from that part of it that Jung and his followers call the Shadow,” the psychologist explained. - In this part of the personality suppressed by our consciousness, socially unapproved qualities are hidden: greed, cowardice, cruelty, sexual promiscuity .
.. Each person has his own list,
although aggressiveness goes into the Shadow in most women. This quality is usually sent to the "basement" in childhood, when parents demand that we stop being angry and be obedient. Thoughts and fantasies that come straight from the unconscious scare us because they conflict with how we see ourselves and how we position ourselves. And the more violently we deny the existence of our "dark side", the more actively it invades our lives, therefore, forbidding ourselves "bad" thoughts is not a good idea. The shadow will surely find another way out for itself, breaking through in dreams, depressions, phobias, panic attacks or somatic symptoms. The smarter way to let her out is to get to know her without fear and try not to see her as an enemy.”
So, not only are we not magicians, but we are also not perfect? Yes, it's hard to accept. For now, I am afraid to go down into the cellars of consciousness alone, without support. Therefore, I started small - I honestly admitted that I have negative qualities.
