What is a couples retreat


11 Best Couples Retreats Around the World

Courtesy of Agriturismo Casetta

Marriage isn’t always easy. Whether you’re newly navigating life as a pair or have decades of experience together as a duo, a time will come where you may need a little help to revive your relationship. If you’re seeking salvation through therapy or simply looking to reconnect by getting unplugged, a couples retreat may have the answers you're looking for.

What Is a Couples Retreat?

A couples retreat is a designated time away for couples to refresh and reset their relationship. It is a time to be intentional about reconnecting with your spouse and take advantage of uninterrupted time together.

According to intimacy expert Leona Carter, there are five types of intimacy within every relationship that may need a rekindling every now and then, and a couples retreat can present the perfect opportunity to spark those flames.

Meet the Expert

Leona Carter is an intimacy coach who empowers couples to build intimacy through the power of dating again to enhance communication, from the kitchen to the bedroom.

What to Expect at a Couples Retreat

Many organizations or relationship experts host couple retreats where spouses can spend time together and engage in activities as a group to enhance communication and problem-solving skills. "A couple should expect a time of learning and growing together through relationship-building activities," Carter says. "There will be a balance of fun and laughter and deep conversations." Most retreats, she says, provide a nice variety of group activities and time to be alone with your spouse. Many feature facilitator-led discussions with outlined topics, while others may be as simple as an adults-only vacation with a self-guided itinerary dedicated to reconnecting the two of you on a deeper level. 

When to Consider a Couples Retreat

Most couples typically seek professional help or relationship-building retreats when issues arise such as infidelity or lack of intimacy. Carter suggests that retreats can also be preventative and can help carve out an opportunity to deepen connections in order to avoid feeling stuck in the relationship. In addition to regularly dating your spouse, she recommends to many couples that they should attend a retreat annually for that reason. However, most couples don't initiate a retreat until there is an underlying or recurring problem.

Average Cost of a Couples Retreat

Depending on the length of the retreat and the amenities included, Carter says costs may range from $1,500 to $5,000+ per couple. No matter what the bottom line is, she shares "it's always worth the investment because of the transformation your marriage experiences."

Scroll through these couples retreat locations to find the perfect place to reignite your romance.

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Courtesy of Agriturismo Caseta

It’s nearly impossible not to feel the romance in Italy. Tucked away in Tuscany, Agriturismo Casetta has an exclusive Enrichment Series for once-in-a-lifetime experiences. Run by a set of unique local connoisseurs in their respective fields, they offer a Transformative Equine Experience—private coaching sessions featuring a transcendental approach to therapy with a professional facilitator and horsemanship expert. The Enrichment Series prices vary as each program is customized to guests. 

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Courtesy of Euphoria Spa

Far from the frenetic pace of everyday life, Euphoria Retreat balances body and spirit through an ethos rooted in Greek and Chinese philosophies based on the Five Elements. Reconnect with the Euphoria Escape for Couples to remove yourselves from the stresses and strains of life and spend time together surrounded by natural beauty and dramatic landscapes of The Peloponnese. This weekend of luxury includes full board and six innovative spa treatments that will touch your soul and leave you feeling like newlyweds. Rates for the couples escape are around $640 per couple for 2 days.

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Courtesy of El Mangroove

Hosted by Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin and his wife Rivka, the founders of The Marriage Restoration Project, these intensive multi-day experiences help couples create a breakthrough in their relationship set against the breathtaking backdrop of Guanacaste, Costa Rica. During the Imago Weekend Couples Therapy Getaways, couples will spend five days and four nights at El Mangroove Autograph Collection with a team of relationship experts to learn about the psychology of relationships, how to better understand conflict, and sharpen the skills that help foster safety and connection.

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Courtesy of ​​The Estate Yountville

The Estate Yountville is a contemporary retreat nestled within a 137-year-old winery complex in the quaint town of Yountville, California. Here, couples can get closer with a Scents & Sensibility ritual. This extraordinary experience of the senses takes place in a luxurious private spa suite and begins with a relaxing lavender inhalation to bring you into the present moment. A curated blend of essential oils awaits as you are each lowered into a full bath soak and transported to a deeper dimension of peace and tranquility before indulging in a sumptuous 100-minute massage and mineral scrub. Tingsha chimes ring in the distance as you awaken from your sensorial experience with a refreshed mental state with your spouse at your side.

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Courtesy of Alila Ventana Big Sur

Perched overlooking the Pacific coastline, this iconic all-inclusive retreat offers a wide variety of exclusive Alila Experiences and elevated wellness-focused activities for reigniting connections. At Alila Ventana Big Sur couples can participate in astrology readings to define the essential stages of life’s journey through birth charts drawn from ancient practices. As a couple, these readings can bring clarity to areas of conflict, emphasizing each other's strengths and providing tools for managing life together in new and creative ways. Astrology readings start at $350 per couple.

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Courtesy of Sedona Soul Adventures

This retreat offers custom-designed retreats for each couple, as no two couples are alike. Sedona Soul Adventures places the focus on healing and is committed to the belief that when heart and soul are given time to realign with a romantic getaway, the mind and body will follow. These four or five-day retreats match couples with a selection of practitioners for one-on-one or two-on-one sessions, uniquely designed to take your relationship from where it is to where you want it to be.

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Courtesy of Miraval Berkshires Resort & Spa

Miraval Berkshires Resort & Spa welcomes couples to explore one of the resort’s various Journeys with Intention together, inviting partners to reconnect through their purpose as a couple. Through these Journeys, the team at Miraval creates custom itineraries for couples based on their specific interests in order to provide an unforgettable vehicle for reconnection and relaxation. Complemented by an array of dynamic fitness, yoga, and wellness programs, Miraval’s couples retreat activities range from "Connection Through Percussion" to "Chinese Astrology: Relationship Reading" to "Just Cook For Me Chef."

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Courtesy of Inns of Aurora

Set upon the pristine backdrop of Cayuga Lake, luxury lakeside boutique resort Inns of Aurora is an ideal place for couples looking for a place to relax and reconnect. Begin your days together with private restorative yoga, meditation sessions, or tarot card readings with the Director of Serenity before indulging in seasonal Ayurveda-inspired couples treatments at the property’s new spa. Explore an extensive selection of activities to take in the beauty of the region, bonding as you kayak, hike, or participate in a private fishing lesson with a resident Outdoorsman.

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Courtesy of Shou Sugi Ban House

Inspired by the principles of eastern healing and wabi-sabi—a Japanese worldview centered on the acceptance of imperfection—Shou Sugi Ban House is the only comprehensive wellness program in the Hamptons. Just a few hours outside of New York City, couples will feel like they’re a world away as they immerse in a Shamanic Healing session or Couples Hypnotherapy that focuses on deep personal growth and drawing wisdom from the subconscious.

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Courtesy of Atlanta Center for Emotionally Focused Therapy

Hosted by a team of licensed therapists from the Atlanta Center for Emotionally Focused Therapy, Hold Me Tight workshops are facilitated to help couples heal broken bonds and rekindle the spark that first brought them together. These two-day retreats were created for couples struggling with communication, intimacy, and security, with the aim to help you understand the real reasons you get into repeated conflicts while encouraging you to engage in conversations keeping your love alive and secure. Rates begin at $1195 per couple.

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Courtesy of Art of Living Retreat

Situated in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina, Art of Living Retreat Center offers a rejuvenating wellness experience surrounded by nature, where guests can relax, renew, and discover inner peace. Year-round, the center offers Couples Wellness Retreats designed to help couples boost happiness, increase relationship satisfaction, and deepen their bond. With fresh mountain air, nourishing food, healing Ayurvedic treatments, and interactive classes that promote well-being, this escape will strengthen bonds while reinvigorating your body, mind, and soul. The all-inclusive package features a two-night stay in the Shankara Ayurveda Wellness room, daily meals, one treatment per person, and daily progressive meditation and yoga classes. The couples wellness escape starts at $1106.

Does Marriage Counseling Really Work?

What Is a Couples Retreat and Why Should You Plan One?

Couples retreats, also known as couples intensives or couples gateways are unique vacation like packages combined with couples counseling that are offered throughout the country and oversees by different relationship experts. For example, I offer different types of couples intensives and staycations in Wake Forest, NC, where I practice, depending on each couple’s unique situation and needs.

Such marriage counseling retreats are a great opportunity to learn about yourself and your partner on a much deeper and vulnerable level, improve your relationship and an overall sense of emotional connection with each other, and enjoy yourselves away from everyday stresses. Which means no kids, no thinking about what to cook for dinner (I am sooo over this one in my own life), and no crap TV at night to unwind from the busy day (because it’s not effective and actually makes things worse).

Before we dive deeper into the couples therapy retreats, let’s make a few things clear. Firstly, a lot of people think that couples retreats are only for those who are legally married or in a common-law marriage. However, you don’t have to be legally married or live together to explore the benefits of a couples therapy retreat. The only thing you do need is love and commitment — to each other, to your relationship, and to results of your deep emotional work together.

But please keep in mind that couples retreat is not a therapy option for couples who are in crisis and couples who are experiencing physical, emotional or any other form of abuse.

How Couples Retreats Work

Couples retreats are a great opportunity to restore your relationship while having a unique romantic getaway without the hustle and bustle of your daily life. The retreat is your chance to take time away from work, kids, and daily chores. To look inward and focus on yourself and each other.

Marriage counseling retreats usually last a day or two and you can find them in different group sizes. The couples counseling group size varies from large groups of 30 to 50 participants to completely private retreats tailored for you and your partner (like the one I offer).

The retreats normally take place in a private, cozy, and beautiful setting, enabling you to receive personalized attention while reestablishing and improving your relationship. These retreats may include discussions, lectures, role plays, exercises and you can combine them with a romantic vacation experience as well.

During the warm-up segment of your retreat, your facilitator will gather information about your relationship or marriage through a structured interview, at the same time helping you to recognize and clarify your couples retreat goals.

In addition to a special journey to the depths of your personality and your relationship, you can enjoy outstanding recreational opportunities during your couples retreat, as well as fine dining options, and a quiet time in the serenity of your retreat destination.

During your couples retreat, you will learn useful skills that will help you deepen and strengthen your relationship, boost your intimacy, and constructively resolve your conflicts.

As for the couples retreat structure, you’ll find the retreats that are more general while others are more specific to the problem. For instance, you can choose a couples retreat that focuses on learning how to handle conflicts, preparing you to a marriage, repairing the relationship after the affair, and so on.

Is Couples Retreat a Good Option for You?

Some of the reasons couples seek marriage retreats include sex and intimacy issues, recovery after an affair, empty nest challenges, midlife crisis, communication problems, conflicts, and divorce. Couples retreat can help revive your connection, deepen your bond and sexual desire, and learn how to grow personally and as a couple.

If you like meeting new people and you feel comfortable in a group retreat setting, you can opt for intimate couples retreats that include up to ten couples in it. However, if you are extremely private or you simply prefer a more private version of couples retreat, then working with other couples may not be for you. In this case, you might consider private retreats with only you and your partner attending.

You can consider this retreat format as a great addition to your regular weekly couples counseling or your online counseling sessions, since it is quite flexible and tailored to your needs. In the atmosphere of total acceptance and with no other couples or distractions, you can explore your feelings, thoughts, needs, and deep dive into your relationship.

In addition to your counseling sessions, your counselor may arrange some special activities for you and your partner such as a romantic lunch/dinner, spa with couples massage or different outdoor activities. These and similar experiences should help you restore your relationship while enjoying yourselves and having fun.

Summary and Concluding Remarks

To sum up, at a good couples retreat, you can expect to learn productive communication skills that go beyond typical “I statements” and gain skills to successfully resolve conflicts while feeling close and connected to your partner. In addition, a successful couples retreat will help you deepen your sense of intimacy and connection, relax and have fun together…and all of this in a beautiful setting away from home!

No matter how close you and your partner are, sometimes the stress of everyday life can kill the magic in your relationship. So, couples retreat is a perfect opportunity to escape your family, work, and the chaos of everyday life and spend some quality time with you SO in peaceful surroundings. This unique rekindling experience can bring you closer together and remind you what attracted you to you each to the other in the first place.

6 retreats for couples

Rainbow Hearth Sanctuary and Retreat Center


There are family retreats throughout North America and abroad that can help you rekindle the spark in your relationship. Whether you just want to leave or reconnect, seclusion can be a healing and cathartic experience. Whether you're married, single, struggling, or just looking to rekindle your romance, the following tips will help meet a wide variety of needs.



Texas Couples Retreat

Texas Family Retreat Vacation


Texas Couples Retreat is a two-night, full-board accommodation for two people (breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and drinks), including dinner on the day of arrival and breakfast on the day of departure. The retreat is perfect for couples who just want to get away and does not include therapy.

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What to Expect

Unlike other couples’ retreats, this one is not about psychological transformation through therapy, but rather the focus is on creating a beautiful, unstructured experience for couples who just want to spend more time with each other or celebrate a special occasion. like an anniversary. Couples can expect:



  • Pleasant suite, hearty food and peaceful environment
  • One and a half hour couples body massage for each person to relieve muscle tension and anxiety.
  • Unstructured time to walk around and enjoy the view, participate in outdoor activities or enjoy the hot tub - but the time is unstructured so couples can spend time together as they see fit.

Costs

Cost $639 or $759, depending on kit.

Healing Couples Retreats

Healing Couples Retreats


Healing Couples Retreats at Soulmate Oracle is located about an hour north of San Francisco and is run by Dr. John Gray, author of Five Minute Relationship Repair. The Healing Couples Retreat is best suited for couples (married or single) who are experiencing significant difficulties and challenges. The individual work that couples do with Dr. Gray makes this experience unique.



What to expect

Couples can attend classes for two to four days and use either group or private lessons. The program is unique in that it is not a seminar. Rather, retreats are tailored to each couple's personal needs and lifestyle. Dr. Gray reports that couples can make rapid progress towards their goals by moving away from the standard program. Couples need to know:

  • Opening hours 10:30 am to 5:30 pm or 6:30 pm, with a long lunch break in the middle of the day.
  • The couples will do their homework every evening.
  • Couples have a couple of hours to prepare before they arrive.
  • Group retreats are held very small to get maximum benefit.
  • While the retreat usually takes place in Sonoma County, Dr. Gray is open to private retreats in foreign countries for a romantic getaway.

Costs

None of the retreat-related costs include food, transportation, or lodging. The couples stay at a nearby hotel and drive to Dr. Grey's every morning. The cost varies depending on your experience and whether you are doing a private retreat or a group retreat:

  • The two-day private retreat is $2,900 per couple, the three-day private retreat is $3,900 per couple, and the longer retreat is an additional $1,300 per day.
  • The small group retreat will cost $1,800 and usually starts on Friday afternoon and continues on Sunday evening. These prices do not include travel, lodging and meals.

Although it's expensive, Dr. Gray reports that many couples are finding the tools they need to manage and heal their relationship.

Gottman Couples Retreats

Gottman Couples Retreats is a two-day retreat on Orcas Island, Washington where you work with a doctor. John and Julie Gottman. You get lectures, role plays, special exercises and more with a sea view. This retreat is perfect for couples who feel like their marriage is in trouble.

What to expect

The retreat consists of two parts: the first day is devoted to strengthening friendship and intimacy. The second day is dedicated to helping couples resolve conflicts and build their relationship through creating shared meaning. Every day couples:

  • Listen to science-based lectures on relationships, witness role-plays, and do exercises with your partners.
  • Exercise with each other

In groups of no more than six pairs. The Gottmans also offer private retreats with "marathon therapy," which consists of five hours a day with one of two doctors over two to four days.

Expenses

Cost is $5,500 per couple and includes room and board.

Sonoma Couples' Retreat

Sonoma Couples' Retreat

The Sonoma Couples' Retreat is for couples who are struggling with relationship problems. It is led by Imago Pairs Coach Marianne Kharms, CSW (PA LCSW). This retreat is perfect for couples who really want to work through their relationship issues in privacy. The retreat is for individual couples only, there are no group options.

What to expect

The lack of group options makes this retreat unique. Couples can expect:

  • Private Garden Cottage
  • 10 to 12 hour coaching sessions with Marianna, during which couples learn how to heal grief, anger, suffering, failure, fear and other things that destroy intimacy.

Costs

Cost is $2,500 and includes materials, workbook, amenities, and breakfast and lunch. (Dinner is eaten in town.)

Inner Odyssey Family Retreat

Inner Odyssey Family Retreat offers a small group getaway for couples in the serene setting of Salt Spring Island, British Columbia, Canada. The retreat is led by Sharon Bronstein MSW and Alan Kaplan MA, who have over 30 years of experience working with couples.

What to expect

Individual programs offer experiential coping strategies as well as guided exercises to explore strengths and overcome differences. The retreat also includes meditation and massage, journaling and reflection exercises.

Costs

Price is $895 per pair and includes communications kit.

What to expect

During the retreat, couples can learn:

  • Be clear about your goals as a couple
  • Understand your and your partner's personality better
  • Identify their particular relationship style
  • Build lasting and enjoyable relationships
  • Improve communication
  • Work through specific problems in the relationship
  • that disrupts communication
  • Drop emotional walls and discuss feelings openly and helpfully
  • Enrich partnership
  • Fix things up when you're close to breaking up

Need a couples getaway?

You may want to consider a retreat if you and your partner are having problems, or even if you just need time to reconnect. While family retreats are often intense, with a lot of psychological work packed into a few days, they are usually carefully crafted so as not to be overwhelming. In fact, one of the reasons these specialty workshops are often held in beautiful, resort settings is that they give couples space and time to process their feelings and ideas. Couple retreats work just as well as they do because they initiate a process of transformation in how a couple interacts, connects, understands, and rebuilds trust. Relationships heal when each person understands how their significant other feels and the reasons for their reactive, unloving behavior in the past.

What are retreat centers and why are they being opened in Russian villages

T

CULTURE•TRENDS

Text: Vadim Smyslov

ALENA WHEEL 9000 3

New retreat resorts are opening in the picturesque corners of Russia, where meditation practices are held all year round. They even penetrate the territory of contemporary art: for example, all summer long, on the installation lawn of artist Pavel Altkhamer, the Garage Museum and the Pangaia fashion brand conduct group meditations. But, unlike Indian ashrams, the life of retreats in Russia is not without problems. For yoga priests - sinners, for people living near retreats - sectarians. Senior editor of The Blueprint Vadim Smyslov met with the new hermits at a seven-day silence retreat and, as soon as the gift of speech returned, he described everything that happened to him there. And to illustrate this journey, photographer Alena Koleso kindly provided the editors with pictures taken in her native village of Novovoskresenskoye in the Vladimir Region: where she returned to reconstruct the memories that calm her down.

Enlightenment comes to everyone in their own way. Hatha yoga instructor Ruslan Aliev found him in 2009 when he was returning home after a party. “I led a wild life and at some point I realized that something was going wrong. I felt overwhelmed, sick and tired, although I was young and everything should have been different.” Illumination descended to the co-founder of the Sports Section community Elena Sdobnikova in Samara 19 years ago. “I was given a subscription to a fitness club,” she says, “and one of the workouts there was yoga. And I remembered my childhood alphabet, in which the letter “y” depicted a yogi sitting on nails. I remembered this, I remembered that I always wanted the same.” Yoga master Alexei Filimonov received a revelation while sitting in a lotus position in one of the Togliatti basements, where he used to go for a new bodily practice. And the owner of Yoga Dacha, a retreat center in Pereslavl-Zalessky, Philip Egorov learned yoga and meditation in 2007, when he opened a yoga section in one of the Moscow sports complexes. “At that moment, there were ten years of karate behind him,” he says. “There were injuries, a sore spine, and yoga as a therapeutic technique suited me.” Over time, Egorov founded the Moscow School of Yoga, where he began to train masters, and built a dacha near the city for visiting seminars.

Early Monday morning it is quiet at Yegorov's dacha. All you hear is a swarm of flies buzzing over the dunghill. There are beds with lettuce, mint and cilantro in the garden, and ripe beaten pears are scattered under the tree. In an hour, one after another, cars will drive up to the dacha, and then life will begin again. But not for long; on Monday afternoon, a seven-day silence retreat starts at Yoga Dacha. According to the rules, exactly at one o'clock, all participants will have to put their smartphones into the basket left in the canteen. All 12 guests, including me, will have to forget for seven days how their voices sound. During the retreat, it is forbidden to talk, read books, listen to music and communicate with gestures. Hard beds, a hanger and a couple of light sources are waiting for everyone in the rooms reserved for participants. The sounds of the gong announce the beginning of meditations: they take place here four times a day and last from one to two hours. There is no time at Yegorov's dacha this week. The only clock that can cling to reality is left in the dining room - a barely visible red alarm clock. Time has its own rules here, different from the metropolis: it’s time to sleep when it gets dark outside, and to rise when the sun comes out from behind the lake.

Another name for the silence retreat is vipassana. According to legend, this practice was invented by the Buddha in the 5th century BC and has come down to us almost in its original form, passed on by monks from one to another. According to Ruslan Aliev, unlike seminars or yoga tours, the Vipassana retreat is strictly regulated: the participants are subject to the schedule and are obliged to follow it. Waking up is followed by meditation, followed by breakfast. The day continues with a short walk around the neighborhood, and then another meditation practice. Lunch is followed by meditation again, then another walk. Finally, the evening meditation is crowned with dinner, and the night meditation is crowned with a tea ceremony, and then only going to bed.

According to The New York Times, testing of Vipassana on people not closely associated with yoga and meditation was first started in 1993 on behalf of Kirana Bedi, the chief inspector of Tihar Jail in New Delhi. Bedi recalled: “On the third day of vipassana, some prisoners threatened the masters with violence, and we had to increase security. But on the eleventh, something happened that I certainly could not expect: when we reported that people could talk again, some of the convicts burst into tears, they repeated that they seemed to know themselves.

A full-fledged study on the effects of Vipassana on mental and emotional health was conducted at Harvard Medical School, and in 2015, Sarah Lazar, who led it, shared the results. “We found in people practicing long-term meditation an increase in gray matter density in the hippocampus (which plays an important role in learning and memory. — Approx. The Blueprint) and a decrease in gray matter density in the cerebellar tonsils, which are involved in the formation of psychological tension” .

“The prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for concentration and logic, takes precedence over emotions,” adds neurologist and psychiatrist Natalya Tereshchenko. “At the same time, the effect of meditation is noticeable only at the moment of meditation or immediately after. In most scientific studies, scientists have not found any benefits of meditation over the same duration of physical education.

“Our brain has a need to periodically clean up the archives, for this you need to cut off the information flow,” says Egorov a couple of hours before the start of the retreat. We are sitting on the roof of Yoga Dacha and watching how Aleksey Filimonov, the master of this week of silence, stretches out in the pose of a dog on three legs on wooden pallets in the yard. “The lack of information flow,” Yegorov continues, “turns the brain to internal processes. And in the first days, our head, as it were, eats up the previously uneaten thoughts, and then, in the course of practice, we can encounter childhood and youthful traumas and try to digest them.

Before the retreat begins, participants are given an introductory lecture. Filimonov explains that the essence of meditation practices is to concentrate on your breathing and not be distracted by external stimuli. Let past your ears, and not through yourself, the noise of a juicer in the dining room or fantasies and memories that suddenly come to mind. In the course of practice, it is important to maintain a fixed body position; any pain, according to Filimonov, demonstrates certain clamps, the pain must be accepted, "and soon it will pass." He asks if there are any among the participants who have had experience of being in psychiatric hospitals, and when he does not receive an answer, he leads a group of 12 people into the hall. This is an obligatory clarification: after several suicides of former vipassana participants (all known incidents occurred abroad. - Approx. The Blueprint), the course for people suffering from serious mental disorders differs from what is prescribed in the basic retreat schedule.

One of the latest incidents when the dark side of Vipassana made itself known loudly occurred in June 2017. Then American Megan Vogt was found dead under a bridge in Pennsylvania. In her suicide note, she said: “Please forgive me. I remembered what I saw on the retreat. Finally, those memories came back to me. And I just can't live with them." “During meditation, tremendous work with the neural network takes place, other states and worlds open up,” explains Tatyana Chernigovskaya, director of the Institute for Cognitive Studies at St Petersburg University. “This is a very serious story, and it is not recommended to meditate intensively on your own.” “Meditation can be dangerous if a person tries to solve mental problems through this practice, which in a good way should be addressed to a doctor,” adds Natalya Tereshchenko.

“The Silence Retreat is NOT a religious, medical, or counseling activity,” reads the practice agreements filled out and left in the canteen by each participant. The first strike of the gong resounds throughout the “Yoga Dacha” - meditation begins. At the same time, the village of Gorodishchi is deafened by the ringing of the church bell.

Where yogis grow from

Retreat centers appeared in Russia not so long ago. And Yoga Dacha, founded by Egorov in 2015, is among the pioneers. “Before, I had to go to Asia for retreats,” says Elena Sdobnikova. India and Nepal have always been considered a place of attraction, because time flows more slowly there, there is no excess fuss. And besides, the body in such regions is softer. You don't have to spend a lot of time warming it up before practice." “In addition, in northern countries, such as ours, the break in contact with the body is much more noticeable,” adds Egorov. “It hurts, it freezes, it feels hungry, the brain is bombarded with unpleasant signals, and the head blocks bodily receptors.”

The exact number of active retreat centers in Russia is unknown; The Association for the Advancement of a Culture of Mindfulness did not respond to The Blueprint's request. But the most popular "places of power" are mentioned by the masters themselves. In addition to "Yoga Dacha" in Gorodishchi, in the neighboring village near Pereslavl - Kamysheva - there is another retreat house, "Yoga Dacha. Weather forecast". This year, Igor Budnikov's retreat center was built and opened in Crimea. At "Bolotov. Dacha" in the Tver region, there is a house from the "Sports Section" of Elena Sdobnikova. A yoga house has been opened in Zavidovo near Moscow, and a retreat Garden of Joy is operating in Yakhroma. But choosing a retreat solely by location is not worth it, says the founder of the Ashram yoga studio and blogger Natalia Osmann. “I have been in practice for more than 17 years,” she says, “I have been on retreats with serious teachers and guides in India, Indonesia, Georgia, and the USA. And the main thing that I advise is to choose, first of all, a person who will accompany you throughout the entire practice. A serious teacher who, thanks to many years of experience, knows how not to injure participants, not a coach who received a certificate in three months and began to conduct retreats.

The lack of a retreat card for Russia is probably related to the cultural context. According to Sdobnikova, who practiced in Yakhroma, the owner of the center urges the masters and guests not to sing mantras after ten in the evening, so as not to instill fear in the neighbors. The retreat center of Igor Budnikov outrages the people in the Bakhchisarai region of Crimea. The locals even sent a request to the Ministry of Internal Affairs to check whether narcotic substances were distributed in the retreat areas and whether sectarians had occupied the Belbek Valley. “There is a horror story about us here, as if we are children of the sun,” says Budnikov. — At 19In the 90s there was a sect in which people really engaged in debauchery, stole and behaved immorally. But we live in 2021! And where will we end up if we react to everything new with clichés?” The church does not get tired of criticizing retreats, which considers attempts to “go into the astral plane without repentance” deadly for the soul. Back in 2009, Patriarch Kirill, at a meeting with young people in Istra, stated that meditation “can destroy a person’s national self-consciousness, his cultural identity,” and he called people wearing traditional Buddhist clothing “not Russians.”

Elena Sdobnikova notes that retreats rarely manage to avoid cultural conflicts. Finding a suitable area for centers, dachas and houses is possible only where the word "asana" is taken by the locals for one of the varieties of wasps. “The beauties of the villages where the retreats are located are preserved only because the people living there are not immersed in a modern context,” says the yogini. “They don’t renovate old houses, they don’t destroy nature and they let their native land wither nobly.”

According to the latest published data of the Russian population census, in 2010, 56 people lived in Gorodishchi, where Yoga-Dacha is located; fresh estimates (the census began in 2020) will be published only this winter, but Sdobnikova is sure that the retreat house has turned into a “city-forming” enterprise. "I had a practice there and I remember how guests went to the locals, bought milk and apples from them." I also notice the connection with the local context: when, after an hour and a half of meditation practice, there is a break for lunch, I go out for a walk around the village. Tall grass breaks through the bottom of the bus, alabai barks behind the neighbor's fence, wild sunflowers grow along the road. "May I ask? the stranger calls. — Do you need fertilizers? We sell in bags. This is the best manure in all Settlements.”

Peace is not only a dream

Vipassana practiced at Yoga Dacha differs from most similar retreats. The latter, like the practice introduced in the prisons of New Delhi, refer to the teachings of the Indian master Goenka. According to the master's plan, to achieve the greatest effect from the retreat, one should meditate for about 9 hours a day for 10 days. Aleksey Filimonov, as he himself admits, "prefers a softer Thai tradition." Among those who come to the dacha are people of all stripes. “I remember I worked at RBC when I first went on a retreat,” recalls Ruslan Aliev. - That's what I said to my colleagues: "I'm going to a retreat, to a seminar." In response, they only laughed and said: “What is this, a broccoli party?” But once in the country, I just went nuts. Aliyev recalls housewives, businessmen, employees from the FSB, doctors who came to the retreat for relaxation. “There are sectarian retreats,” he says, “where they always talk about awareness, openness of the heart, chakras, womb breathing. And there are normal ones: where everyone understands that few people will be able to achieve enlightenment and all this is just a good physical and emotional reboot. Just a good rest with special effects.”

TSUM Senior PR Manager Stefania Nikolaeva recalls that she went to Yoga Dacha because she "began to get anxious and hysterical about the work that just wouldn't finish." “It was a way for me to turn off my phone for money,” she says. “I just wanted to abstract from everything.” Every fourth smartphone owner, according to a report from Counterpoint Research, spends more than 7 hours a day with a gadget. In 2018, the word "nomophobia" - the fear of being without a phone for a long time - was recognized as the word of the year by the Cambridge Dictionary. “Most people don’t even realize that increased anxiety, a feeling of burnout, fatigue arise precisely because of an overabundance of communication,” notes Maxim Kashulinsky, publisher of Reminder (media about self-development, health. - Approx. The Blueprint). “When the boundary between work and leisure is blurred and a person stays online all the time, not imagining how to part with a smartphone.”

When my smartphone ended up in the gadget bin, life seemed to stop. As with the failure of one of the senses, others began to heat up quickly. I distinctly - and maybe for the first time in a long time attentively - listened to how grass was being cut in a neighboring plot. Like cabbage sizzling in a frying pan in the dining room, and children screaming and splashing in Lake Pleshcheyevo. On the one hand, meditation calmed, and on the other hand, thoughts changed in my head: what was forgotten, not done, not invented and missed. “Concentrate on your breathing,” repeated Filimonov, the only person in the country who had the right to vote. “Take a deep breath as thoughts fill fantasies and memories. Breathe, your body is still and steady, your stomach is inflated and retracted, concentrate all your attention on breathing. After the first hour of meditation, my legs became numb. After the second one, I dreamed of dinner and another walk. At the third hour, the irritation reached the limit, I only thought about how I’m going to get the hell out of here, as soon as everyone goes to sleep, how many opportunities I miss, pretending to be enlightened, and I can’t even shout that it’s all pointless (“Respect the retreat of other participants ," Filimonov said at the beginning of the session. "Keep silence at all costs").

During the breaks, the participants silently wandered around the dacha yard, not looking at each other. An adult woman was sitting on a swing and looking into the distance. A young couple lounged in hammocks, and someone sat on the porch and drank lemon-ginger tea mixed with halva. “During the retreat, I had a clear association,” says Nikolaeva. - It was as if the vase had split, and now, in the rewind, it was assembled into a single object. I remembered strange passages from life, some ridiculous pictures and could not understand what all this was for. And then everything suddenly turned into something understandable and logically built. The brain had no external stimuli, and it began to play kaleidoscope with me." But in my case, everything worked differently: I thought about deadlines and the last bus from Pereslavl, which without me is leaving for Moscow right now.

And when the day ended, the corridors and halls were empty, the smartphone was back in my hands. I was ready to spend 4,000 on a taxi just to get out of Yoga Dacha immediately, but not a single car wanted to go along the country road to Gorodishchi, and then to Moscow. “It’s commendable, Philip,” I thought, and, hiding under a blanket in a cell, I called Blablacar drivers, but the whisper probably sounded ominous, and everyone refused to give me a lift.


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