Ways to be romantic
How To Be Romantic: 7 Qualities Of A Romantic Person
What does it mean to be romantic?
Being romantic is about expressing love and dedication in a way that's intentional, unmistakable, and deeply affectionate. It often involves dramatic or passionate gestures, though smaller actions that indicate enduring affection can also be romantic.
The word romantic stems from the Latin word Romanus or Romanicus, which literally meant "Roman" or "from Rome." Throughout the Middle Ages, the old French adopted the word romanz, meaning "of the Roman vernacular," to describe both a specific type of Latin speech as well as the literature written in that vernacular style—which generally featured tales of knights, chivalry, and passion. Over time, the word "romance" began to become associated with dramatic love stories in general.
That's part of why romance today is often associated with over-the-top gestures between lovers. "Being romantic involves creating a sense of passion, anticipation, and excitement within a relationship," clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, Ph. D., tells mbg. "Romantic partners don't need to be a specific personality type; they can be introverts, ambiverts, or extroverts. A romantic partner, however, does need to be attentive, thoughtful, willing, creative, and considerate of [their] partner's secret (and not-so-secret) longings."
Qualities of a romantic person:
1.
Affectionate
First and foremost, a romantic person is willing to regularly show how much they love and adore the object of their affection. They might regularly offer small displays of affection, whether that's through acts of service, words of affirmation, or other sweet gestures.
"Whether you bring your partner a love-filled cup of coffee each morning, lather each other's backs in the shower, or enjoy holding hands as you walk, true romance is all about showing your love for each other in consistent, meaningful ways," Manly says. "Consistent displays of meaningful attention (whether it's kissing, small token gifts, touch, or whispering 'sweet nothings') can keep a romantic mood alive every day. "
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2.
Thoughtful
"The most romantic of partners are those who are mindful of their significant other's needs and desires in passionate, thoughtful ways," Manly says. "The most important habit shift to make if trying to become more romantic is attentiveness. If you become tuned in to what your partner wants and needs, you can craft spontaneous surprises and long-term romantic patterns that will eternally thrill your partner."
3.
Dedicated
Importantly, a romantic person doesn't just offer a bunch of gifts and sweet nothings with no real meaning behind them. A huge part of what makes someone or something romantic is the idea that the love and passion they offer is unwavering and enduring, and it's uniquely offered to a specific person. That's what separates a romantic person from a flirt: the intensity, longevity, and specificity of their feelings.
That's why the most romantic speeches or love letters, for example, are often highly personalized: "For a longtime love, you want to talk about memories, overcoming obstacles together, what made you fall in love initially, why you still love them today, and what you see in the future," Lia Miller, M.A., MPA, MSW, a writer and clinically trained social worker, writes at mbg.
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4.
A tendency for big gestures
The original concept of romance came from stories of the chivalrous deeds of knights willing to lay down their lives for love. In modern times, dramatic gestures are still associated with the idea of romance: traveling long distances to surprise the person you love, proposing in front of a big crowd of people, or even simply talking about your future together early on in a relationship.
5.
Sentimental
Romantic people might also specifically describe their love for someone in highly sentimental, cosmic, or larger-than-life terms, such as describing their lovers as "soul mates," talking about how fate brought them together, or declaring that their love will last them to the grave and beyond. They may have a tendency to idealize their partner or their relationship as well, which may not exactly be a healthy tendency, despite the romanticism of it.
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6.
Present
On the flip side, not everyone will consider sweeping gestures and over-the-top declaration of love to be romantic. Sometimes being a romantic person is simply about being highly present, warm, and affectionate with your partner in the day-to-day moments.
"Meaningful gifts and memorable trips are touching, standout moments in a relationship," marriage therapist Linda Carroll, LMFT, writes at mbg. "However, it's the steady sprinkle of smaller moments of kindness and care that create a trusting and healthy relationship."
7.
Consistent
Being a romantic person means setting a tone of affectionate love and passion year-round, not just on special occasions like Valentine's Day or someone's birthday, Manly points out.
"A true romantic partner tends to 'date' [their] significant other throughout the relationship rather than devoting romantic energy to only one or two hallmark dates per month or year," she explains. "Being a true romantic is a way of life."
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38 ways to be romantic.
Here are just a few ideas for how to be romantic, from big gestures to small habits you can sprinkle on your daily life together:
- Tell them you love them, often.
- Write a love letter reminding your partner of all the reasons you love them.
- Engage in more sensual foreplay ideas.
- Practice having slower, more emotionally connected sex.
- Take note when your partner mentions something they want, and buy it as a present for them.
- Plan a romantic getaway with your partner from top to bottom, so they don't have to think about any of the planning details.
- Always kiss your partner good morning, good night, hello, and goodbye.
- After you get to the end of a day together, tell your partner the things you liked most about the day together.
- Journal about your dates and experiences with your partner so you remember them in detail.
- Reminisce about your fondest memories together—bring up specific details about your partner and the way you felt about them in those moments.
- Ask your partner what makes them feel loved, and then do those things.
- Remember important dates and events your partner has coming up, and check in on them on those days asking how things went or celebrating getting over the milestones.
- Surprise your partner at work with a homemade lunch or meal from their favorite restaurant.
- Make your partner breakfast in bed.
- Come up from behind your partner while they're doing something and wrap your arms around them.
- Hold your partner's hand, or put your arm around them in public.
- Drop in mentions of how much you love your partner while hanging out in group settings.
- When you know your partner is going to have a hard day at work, show up at their office at the end of the day to walk home with them.
- Compliment your partner often.
- Write your partner poetry.
- Watch romantic movies together, and then start bringing in the sweetest lines into how you talk to your partner.
- If you don't live together, text your partner good night every night.
- Talk about what you envision your future together to be like.
- Spark some romantic conversations every now and then! (Here are some conversation starters for couples.)
- Don't fall asleep after sex—instead, cuddle and tell your partner what you liked about your sexual experience.
- If they like physical touch, touch your partner when you talk to them: Rest your hand on their knee, rub their arm, or hold hands.
- Bring back souvenirs for them when you come back from trips so they know you were thinking about them.
- If you see something in a store that you know they'd like, buy it for them—just because.
- Go all out on date nights every now and then: candles, music, cooking special meals, the whole nine yards.
- Suggest new ideas for things to do together as a couple.
- When they're talking to you, really listen—put away any tech, make eye contact, and fully engage in the conversation.
- Get creative with how you express your love: Use metaphors, reference past memories, and go beyond just "I love you."
- When you feel something warm and affectionate about your partner at the moment, just say it out loud.
- Make your partner coffee, tea, or their preferred drink in the morning before they even get up.
- Do small things around the house that you know will make your partner's life easier.
- Don't worry about trying to play it cool—lean into sentimentality.
- Kiss your partner in places other than on the lips: Try their forehead, back of the hand, or shoulder.
- Ask your partner what they find romantic, and do that.
"Given that we all have different preferences and needs, what is romantic to one person may not be at all romantic to another," Manly reminds. "As such, the true romantic takes the time and energy to study the desires of another in order to create or heighten a loving, passionate mood."
100 Ways to be Romantic
Let’s give a helping hand to the couples that want to show their partner that they love them. We’ve just started our list of 100 Ways to Be Romantic. Check out what we’ve come up with so far - and if you have great ideas to share then just let us know and help out romantics around the world.
- The obvious one - buy some flowers. But do it properly – make them your partner’s favourite colour, hide a note inside, buy them just to tell them how much you like them, and present them what your partner is least expecting it.
- Buy some chocolates – but again, the ones your partner likes. Leave them in their office desk drawer as a surprise, or the glove compartment of their car.
- Take them on a romantic retreat. A little break just for two. We’ve got hundreds of luxury cottages for couples – from cute thatched retreats in the romantic Cotswolds, to wild and sublime getaways in the north coasts of Scotland.
- Go on a long walk. This one is so easy, but just getting out of the house can be a great way to blow away the cobwebs and spend some time together.
- Make a meal for them. Something you’ve never made for them before – from scratch. We like Nigel Slater’s recipes. Or Hugh. To be fair, we just like good food.
- Declare tonight a film night. Watch one of the old classics. Brief Encounter, why not?
- Write them a heartfelt letter. This has got to be one of the most romantic things you can do. Tell them why they are valuable, what they’ve done for you, how you feel about them.
- Take them dancing. Deep down I think everyone loves to dance. Make it a classy affair, no dodgy nightclub RnB. It doesn’t matter if you are both hopeless. Go salsa, try one dance, shuffle, and you can spend the rest of the night laughing about it together.
- Invite your friends round. There’s something very heart-warming about a get together. Generosity brings out the best in everyone, and being generous together like this will remind you what it is to be a team.
- Ask how you can help. Their problems are your problems now, and even just reminding them of this can be a huge support. This is quietly romantic – and they won’t forget it.
- Pull them outdoors in the rain and kiss them in the downpour. It’s massively cliché, but Breakfast at Tiffany’s is worth a repeat. And your partner will think it’s amazing, even if they tell all their friends that you have clearly lost your mind.
- Zip off to another city. Set off early, wander around lost, sit in cafes together, ask a local for the best little bistro spot for lunch, potter, and come back home the scenic route.
- Put on their favourite music. It’s a small gesture but it’s cute.
- Get in all the bits you need for a long lazy weekend breakfast. Croissant, anyone?
- Do all the housework for a week. Don’t make a big thing out of it, don’t even tell them, just get it done and give them a break.
- Tickle them. Just be careful they aren’t holding a hot cup of coffee first.
- Take them swimming. Okay it doesn’t sound all that romantic to be in a chlorinated pool – so you get high marks for this one if it’s in the sea – but it’s a good way to remember how to play about together.
- Go on a picnic.
- Show them your favourite view.
- Tell them your favourite physical feature. Do they have big brown eyes, have they got the tiniest feet, strong arms, milky skin? If you don’t tell them, they will never know.
- Find out who their favourite band is and snap up some gig tickets. We very much approve of this one.
- Go for a drive. Somewhere scenic, maybe somewhere you’ve never been before. Head off and don’t look back.
- Make them the world’s best sandwich. I’m talking absolute perfection - rainbow salad, pastrami, avocado, nut bread, roast onion chutney - go on. It’s the small things.
- Fill the front room with candles. Obviously you’re going to have to keep an eye on the place - we don’t want the blame for aromantic suburban inferno. But candlelight is beautiful.
- Hold their hand! One of the oldest and cutest expressions of love.
- Go to the coast. The sea is romantic. Fact. We love the sea.
- Take them back to the place you first met. Okay maybe this one doesn’t work if you met them at a sewage works - but for everyone else, we think this is quite romantic.
- Buy them a new jumper. Conventionally, we know, you’re supposed to buy them underwear - this, however, can go wrong in so many ways. Wrong size trauma. Wrong style issues. Get them a huge great big jumper - you can’t go wrong. Extra points if you get it in their favourite colour.
- Ask them what they want to do with Saturday. Help them plan their favourite day and then go for it.
- Rose petals. Another potential cliche - but it should be done at least once. Find your roses, and scatter the petals from the front door all the way up to bed. If your partner doesn’t like the smell of roses, maybe there’s something else. I mean, for me personally, Oreo cookies scattered up the stairs is romantic - although I think I might be a special case.
- Go fly a kite together. It’s fun, and it’s free, all you need is a strong breeze and a big field.
- Draw them a picture and stick it in their lunchbox. It’ll make them laugh at work.
- Go to the cinema. An oldie, but a goodie.
- Make them a playlist. 20 songs you think they will love or that remind you of them.
- Print some photos. Most people just have their pictures on digital files now - but it’s lovely to see some really nice ones printed out and on the walls.
- Bring back cherries and wine. Like a romantic hunter-gatherer lion. Rawl!
- Tell them your view of the future. In 30 years, will you be by a fireside somewhere? Will you be on holiday by the sea? Will you be arm in arm? It’s a powerful thing to imagine the future. Just leave out the dentures bit.
- Be nice to their parents. Okay, so it’s not traditionally romantic. But all real romance has to have good people behind it, and good people are nice to others – even to the in-laws.
- Carry them. Obviously this is not for you if you are eight months pregnant or have a spinal injury. But it’s a pretty sweet and very funny to carry your partner up a hill.
- Bombard them. Send them a text, email, leave a note in the fridge, on the bathroom mirror, in their cornflakes box. Rig it so that just for one day they will see that you love them in every format. Aww. A warning though, this is just for one day, else their friends will be getting a restraining order sorted.
- Head to the north. There’s less people and a real chance to unwind together with just the two of you. Our favourite spots are in the tiny toy town of Oban, the stunning Highlands, and the Lakes, near where we live!
- Oysters and Champagne. Chocolate, avocado, watermelon, almonds, asparagus and figs are all classic foods of love. We highly recommend them, although, you know, not all together.
- Write them an I O U note. Because if they are amazing then you probably owe them a lot. (By this we don’t just mean the tenner they lent you last month)
- Meet up for lunch. Even if you are both working there’s usually a chance, one day a week or a month, to shuffle things about and whisk away for lunch and a coffee together.
- Run them a bath. Extra points for posh bubbles, and good music. Triple word score for little candles.
- Make your dining room into a restaurant for two. Bring out your finest. Then either make up a romantic meal or order one in. Not Domino’s Pizza eh. Unless the two of you have a thing about it.
- Toast by the fireside. If you haven’t got one at home then we recommend you find a quiet pub and have a cosy evening there. That warm glow is very simply romantic.
- Give a good foot massage…really though? Personally I can’t think of anything worse but apparently some individuals go for this kind of thing, so fair enough. Just stay away from me, you crazy feet people.
We want to get this list all the way to 100! So what have we missed? Send your suggestions here and if they are truly romantic we will add them in.
Filed under Romantic Ideas & Things to do with tags: romantic tips, romantic lists, romantic ideas
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33 ways to be romantic at no cost
Want to be romantic but think it costs a lot of money? We offer you 33 ways to be romantic without spending a lot of money. To please a loved one, you only need your desire.
Of course, there are different costly ways to spend time with your loved one - drive around the city in a limousine, go to a French restaurant, visit a romantic resort. These are also good ways to spend time together, but few people get to do it regularly, so you can use the following ideas to spruce up your life together more often.
Before starting the list, let's look at some notes on how to use it:
1. Regularity. It is recommended to arrange romantic days at least once a week.
2. Communicate. Communicate regularly, discuss your goals and dreams, your plans for the future, do not forget to give compliments.
3. Inspiration. This list contains many obvious things - you can come up with twice as many good ideas on your own. However, the list does not claim to be original - it seeks to be a source of inspiration.
4. Forget Valentine's Day. People think they have to be romantic on special days. There is no need to wait for special days to give joy to yourself and others.
Okay, enough talk. Let's look at the ways to be a romantic:
1. Write the poem
2. Home romantic dinner
3. Massage
4. Arrange a picnic at sunset
5. Collect flowers/yellow leaves on the way home
6. Write a disk with love songs
7. Read poems together
8. Write love notes or SMS
9000 9000 9 Email a love letter
10. Take a moon walk in the park
11. Watch a romantic movie together
12.0012 Accept the joint bath
13. Walk to the places where you met in the first days of dating
14. Prepare a beautiful dessert
15. Make an album with memorable photos, provide them with signatures and drawings
111111111111111111111 16. Kiss in the rain
17. Spend an evening by candlelight
18. Have a slow dance to romantic music
19. A kiss for a long and slowly
20. Arrange the evening of joint dreams
21. Create a list of everything you like or I would like to do and do something from the list
22 22 22 22 22 222 Go to a movie or exhibition
23 Try to look good for your partner
24 Feed each other grapes/strawberries
25. Act out a romantic scene from a movie together
26. Imagine going on a first date - buy flowers, dress well, treat your partner, do everything as if it were the first time
27. Scent each other
28. Throughout the day, use your words and actions to remind you that you love him/her
29.9 Have dinner on the roof0003 30. admit love in different forms and different words 31. Play with blindfolded eyes, feathers 32. Public Public 33. Ordinate Any Song on Radio Want to add romance to a relationship? First, a few scientific facts about love. Psychologist, professor at Cornell University Robert Sternberg developed a "three-component theory of love." Sternberg suggested that love is made up of three basic components: Intimacy : Feeling of connection, unity between lovers. Passion : Desires associated with romantic infatuation and sexual attraction. Commitment : In the short term, this is a decision to enter into a love relationship; in the long term, a commitment to keep and maintain this love. When you have been married or in a relationship for a long time and the honeymoon is long over, it becomes difficult to strike a balance between the three components. “It often seems to men that the best way to maintain harmony in a relationship is to give expensive gifts or exotic trips. In fact, even small, but regular courtesies can do much more for a relationship than any gifts, ”says Keith Dent, a coach, a specialist in personal development and relationships. Here are 15 ideas for men who want to add some romance to their relationship with their wife or girlfriend. 1. Order an unusual card with a love message Love notes or cards show your partner that you took the time and showed imagination by writing an unusual text. To make her especially pleased, leave the card in a place where she will definitely look, but will not expect such a surprise. If you are ready to spend money, you can make a custom-made postcard especially for her. 2. Sneak a kiss on her. A kiss, by definition, should be unexpected. What could be more romantic? Such a kiss shows the beloved woman that she is always desirable for you, no matter what she is doing at the moment. 3. Compliment her when she looks in the mirror Looking at herself in the mirror, she wants her appearance to match (or even exceed) her inner self-image. If at such a moment you compliment her, you thereby give an additional charge of confidence, helping to love and appreciate yourself more. This also strengthens her feelings towards you (for all three components of love). 4. Take on some of her household chores By making more time for household chores, you will show how much you appreciate the balance in the relationship and give her the opportunity to get some rest. 5. Make Your Own Decision Of course, women want to be part of the decision-making process, but does she really want to make all the decisions for both of you? Decisiveness can be very romantic, as you show the woman you love that you know what she wants and are ready to take care of everything. How to add romance to a relationship: 15 tips for men