Setting boundaries when dating

5 Tips for Setting Boundaries in Dating

When you start dating someone new (or even if you've been together a while), it's important to make sure you always feel comfortable in the relationship and are being true to who you are. The start of a new relationship is a good time to begin laying down some ground rules with your partner (and we don’t only mean physical boundaries, either). And what about if you’re already in a relationship? Communication is key, and you should still broach the topic and have an honest conversation—no matter how long you’ve been together for a while.

What Are Boundaries in Dating?

Boundaries in dating are a person's limits in a relationship. They allow each person to maintain their needs, space, individuality, and health.

Although we can always change our mind and some of our boundaries become more flexible when we get closer to someone, it’s key to start a relationship with clarity, says relationship psychotherapist Leslie Malchy. “A hand on the arm can be a welcome source of intimacy and comfort to one person or a privacy violation to another,” she explains. “Communicating what we need is a way of protecting ourselves in relationships and protecting others from the pain of hurting us.”

Meet the Expert

  • Leslie Malchy is a psychotherapist based in Vancouver.
  • Jennifer Twardowski is a self-love coach and writer.

Below we’ve rounded up five healthy steps for setting boundaries in dating, explained by Malchy and self-love coach Jennifer Twardowski.

Decide How You Feel

Take time apart from the person or people you’re dating to think about what sort of boundaries are most important to you. (How often you’ll communicate with one another and how frequently you’ll see each other are just two simple boundaries to start to get your wheels turning.) “The problem with many of us who have weak or leaky boundaries in relationships is that we become so enmeshed, so encompassed by the other person’s "stuff" that we have no idea what it is that we ourselves are feeling,” says Twardowski. “By taking the time to break away, reflect, and really check in with yourself, you are then consciously making the distinct difference between yourself and the other person [or people].”

Find a Neutral Playing Field (or Time)

When you’re having a serious (and private) conversation like this, it may be best to do it at one of your places, especially if the topic of physical intimacy is going to be brought up. Although a neutral place like a coffee shop would be ideal, it doesn’t necessarily make sense here. And since it’s sometimes challenging to keep the place neutral, you can try to keep the timing neutral. For example, if the talk is premeditated, have it while you aren’t already disagreeing about something else and when you’re both feeling level-headed.

Come Prepared With Nonnegotiables

Brainstorm the boundaries that you have to set in your relationship for it to work for you. Think: What do you need without a doubt to keep you comfortable and confident while dating this person or these people? Are there things that physically you will never feel okay with? Is there a certain number of times per week you want to touch base with the person or persons you’re dating? These nonnegotiables can run the gamut, but identifying them early on will help you learn whether the two or more of you are compatible in the first place. Here’s the truth: If a potential partner isn’t okay with respecting your nonnegotiables, then it’s time to walk.

Listen, Listen, Listen

After you’re done discussing your needs, it’s time to listen. There are two or more people in every dating scenario, and each deserves to be heard. If you don’t understand what you’re hearing, it’s time to ask some questions. Chances are that it’s not going to go over well in a few weeks (or months) if you said a boundary of your partner’s or partners’ was okay but you never understood it in the first place.

Be Good To Yourself

Realize that by trying to set boundaries in dating, you’re protecting yourself, and that’s a good thing. If your discussion brings up any backlash or feelings of guilt, then you need to take care of yourself, says Twardowski. Leave and go outside or practice yoga if that’s more your style. “Do something to help yourself get re-centered, and don’t spend too much (or any) energy focusing on what happened,” she says. Speaking up for yourself should never make you feel bad, and if another person makes you feel this way, they don’t deserve to be dating you.

How to set boundaries in the early stages of dating

We're all entitled to boundaries and we deserve to have them respected. Credit: Getty Images

> Life > Health & Wellness > Mental Health

I'd just got in the bath when my phone buzzed on the window sill. It was, alas, out of reach. But I had a sneaking suspicion of who the message was from.

I got up and leaned across to my device, bath suds and water dripping all over the floor. With wet fingers, I swiped up to see the WhatsApp and instantly wished I'd stayed in the bath.

"Send pics," read the message from the guy I barely knew.

Until this moment, things had been going so well. So well, in fact, that I was deeply suspicious.

Sending nudes to a near-stranger in the early stages of dating is a boundary for me. That might not be the case for everyone, but in my case, it's not something I do unless I'm sleeping with the person. But at this point, I hadn't even gone on a first date with this guy yet. We'd simply kissed on a night out with friends and started texting each other.

I sat back in the bath and deliberated how to respond. My heart raced as I asked myself if it was easier to just comply with this request. My thoughts urged me not to be awkward, not to be a prude. But something stronger was overriding these — a fierce feeling that I just didn't want to do what was being asked of me. The anxiety I could physically feel told me I'd be crossing my own boundaries if I yielded.

I waited an hour, scrambling to find the right words to tell him 'no.' "Hey," I began. "So I have a rule that I don't send pics to someone unless I've slept with them." He replied almost instantly. "That is a very good rule," he said. The conversation went back to whatever we'd been talking about before. No awkwardness, no annoyance, nothing that I'd feared had happened.

But I couldn't shake the feeling that at age 30, I shouldn't be struggling to tell a man I'd met twice that I didn't want to do something. But here we are. My friends also tell me they feel highly nervous, overcome with anxiety when setting boundaries in the early stages of dating.

SEE ALSO: How to stop caring what people think about you

So, why are boundaries so important? "Boundaries set the basic guidelines for how a person wants to be treated," according to Neil Wilkie, founder of online couples therapy platform The Relationship Paradigm. "Clear boundaries are essential for our own mental health and self-esteem."

While this post deals primarily with boundaries in dating and romantic and sexual relationships, I'd note that boundaries are vital in ALL relationships — be that with family, friends, colleagues, and even your internet followers. For marginalised communities, in particular, respecting boundaries is deeply important in preventing re-traumatisation, and examples of boundary violations can include white people asking their Black friends to explain racism and people tagging sexual violence survivors in social media posts about sexual trauma. Everyone has the right to set boundaries and to have them respected.

Seeking approval while compromising boundaries

Boundaries are key, but in terms of dating, establishing them with someone you like and don't know very well can seem a little daunting at first. "When we’re nervous about holding onto someone else’s approval we can compromise on boundaries," Rachael Lloyd, relationship expert at eharmony, told me. "But once you start doing that, your own sense of self can erode and you can soon lose yourself in the relationship." If you're not 100 percent sure of your own boundaries, Lloyd said you might be clued in by your instincts. "You’ll know when a boundary is overstepped because you’re likely to suddenly feel triggered emotionally, within your body."

Getting in early with boundary setting also means heading off at the pass any potential future sources of resentment and friction that could arise. "In the early days of a relationship it is rare for a couple to discuss boundaries, which will mean that the ground rules are unclear and uncertain," explained Wilkie. Discussing your sexual boundaries with a new partner is particularly important in making sure you both feel comfortable and safe. "It is so much easier to talk about boundaries in the early days of a relationship as that will be coming from a place of growth and clarity rather than resentment and blame," Wilkie added.

How to talk about boundaries

What do you do if a discussion with someone you're newly dating veers into territory that you're not OK with? "If you enter into a topic of conversation that makes you feel uncomfortable or is delicate, such as political views, family life or salary, politely assert your boundary and explain that you’d rather not discuss that at this point, while changing the conversation to something that you have in common," explained Lloyd.  

But you don't have to wait until a line has been crossed before having a chat about boundaries. Why not have a conversation about both your boundaries? "Introduce the topic gently, maybe by asking them, 'What is important for you in a relationship?'. If they open up, great. If not, then try again in a different way," Wilkie suggested. "Notice what is important for you and what boundaries you feel are being transgressed. Bring these up in a way like: ‘When you do x, I feel y’ rather than ‘It’s horrible when you do x’ do."

If the person is reluctant to discuss boundaries, or if they react badly to you setting a boundary, this could be a red flag. "If they are breaking the boundaries and don’t want to engage in conversation about it, question if are they right for me?" said Wilkie.

When it comes to intimacy, it's advisable to bring up sexual boundaries before you've entered a sexual encounter with that person. In the moment, if you are having sex with someone and a boundary is being crossed, remember that consent can be withdrawn at any point, and each new sexual act that's introduced in an encounter needs to be consented to. Our boundaries change and evolve over time, so if you're in a long-term relationship with someone, check in with each other and see where you're at.

If you're in a long-term relationship with someone and you want to have a meaningful exchange about one another's boundaries, you could try drawing up a list. Wilkie suggested getting each partner to draw up a list of what their boundaries are, then sharing and discussing what those boundaries mean to them, before comparing any similarities and differences. Making sure you've been listened to and understood is really important. If you feel there's room for improvement in the way your partner interacts with and respects those boundaries, let them know. If you want to, schedule regular meetings to chat about these and whether sufficient progress has been made.

Setting boundaries while social distancing

Given that we're living in a global pandemic, we also need to think about a person's boundaries in relation to COVID-19. You might feel fine with hugging a close friend, but the person you're meeting up with might not be up for that, for example. Same when it comes to dating — many will feel uneasy about meeting up in person for a first date.

Dating expert Melissa Hobley from OkCupid said it's important to remember that intimacy isn't just a physical thing, and you don't have to touch someone to create a meaningful connection.

"The hallmark sign of any strong relationship is honesty," said Hobley. "If you’re concerned about meeting your date or partner in a public place, voice your concerns. Suggest an alternative suggestion. For instance, a dinner date over FaceTime or a virtual movie night with Netflix Party — these are both ways to keep the fun alive, but also assert those physical boundaries."

It's important to remember that virtual dates aren't for everyone, and though sexting and sending nudes have been on the rise during lockdown and quarantine periods, you get to decide what you're comfortable with. If you do meet up in person, have a think about what you will and won't be OK with — even down to how soon you'd like to meet in person if you've been chatting on an app. "Be aware of your physical boundaries too, and plan the level of intimacy that you’d be comfortable with before meeting up with your new date," said Lloyd. "This will avoid any spontaneous decisions that may put you in situations that make you feel uncomfortable. It’s OK to say, 'I want to take things slowly, as I’m really enjoying getting to know you.'"

At the end of the day, we're all entitled to boundaries and we deserve to have them respected. Just because you're in the early stages of dating someone doesn't mean you have to compromise on something that keeps you feeling protected and safe. The person's response to a boundary being set will usually give you a good idea about whether this relationship is worth pursuing.

Features Editor

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Rachel Thompson is the Features Editor at Mashable. Based in the UK, Rachel writes about sex, relationships, and online culture. She has been a sex and dating writer for a decade and she is the author of Rough (Penguin Random House, 2021).

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I'm in the house: how to set boundaries correctly

Personal boundaries are a line that runs between individuals, the people around them and larger social systems. They are needed so that we can clearly feel: where I am, and where I am not; where are my own emotions, actions, beliefs and thoughts, and where are others. And if these emotions and thoughts are mine, then I am responsible for them and control them. Borders also protect our inner world from outside encroachment.

Finished reading here

They may look like a five-meter stone fence with barbed wire and machine gunners on the towers. Or they may be absent altogether - all the doors will be wide open. Boundaries can change depending on the context and environment, become solid for some people and completely blurred for others.

Personal boundaries can be opened for "import", when we gladly accept other people's help, resources, time, money, etc., or for "export" - our own resources. We usually import what we especially need, and we export either what we have in abundance, or what we hope to get a good price for.

Boundaries are needed to mark two important issues:

1. What do I consider my property (and therefore will I protect)?

2. What am I responsible for (and will try to control)?

Boundary checking

How does this manifest itself in specific behavior? There are people for whom property boundaries can be very arbitrary. Such a person does not consider anything his own, inviolable, he "does not become attached to things." He cannot close himself in his room because he considers it impolite. Such people cannot refuse help or money, even realizing that this money will not come back. Their borders are always open for imports, it is important for them that people see them as kind, generous and open. It's a way to build relationships. Sometimes they even think that having nothing of their own is safer.

The opposite type is people whose boundaries are too wide. They consider everything their property - wife, children, employees, office or apartment space, other people's things and time. They do not see other people's boundaries and do not consider it necessary to observe them. Wherever such a person is, there is always “too much” of him, he captures the space around him. And if he was not given something in a good way, he can take it away "in a bad way. "

Two "extreme" types also exist in relation to responsibility. There are people who take on too much, trying to control what is beyond their control. Such a wife thinks that her husband yelled at her because she did not have time to set the table on time or did not clean up well enough. People agree with every charge brought against them. The logic is this: if I tried better (guessed other people's desires and did everything right), then this would magically change those around me, make them happy and loving. People with such a strategy of thinking lack recognition and praise, they are ready to do everything to get this simple currency.

The other extreme is characters who are not ready to take responsibility not only for others, but also for themselves. They do not see their contribution to the development of conflict situations, do not accept criticism and try to avoid any obligations. If you entrust them with a project, they will either require a partner or will come running every half hour with questions and clarifications so that the responsibility does not lie with them (or at least not with them alone). Men with a fear of responsibility are almost elusive for marital or paternal obligations. They consider them a violation of their boundaries, because the family will force them to change their usual way of life.

Border Guard Day

How to define your borders and protect them? Unfortunately, you cannot put up pegs and notify others that “this half a meter of land around me is my territory, do not enter without knocking.” Although, in fact, this is exactly what young ladies with long puffy skirts did in the old days.

In my trainings, I often do a simple exercise. I ask a person to designate a limit invisible to others, and I begin to slowly approach it - step by step. The task of the participant is to make it clear without words that I am already close to the point that I do not need to cross. The reaction is very different. Someone is very calm at first and only at the last moment begins to frown. Someone, on the contrary, from my first step “gets into a pose” and puts on “boxing gloves”. Very polite people let me close, with a bewildered smile on their face. And only then it turns out that I have long passed the intended border. There was also such an “intelligent” reaction: when a person understands that I am not going to stop and provoke him to more obvious actions, he himself takes a step back, leaving his integrity stable. But in order to stay at a safe distance from me, he has to give up his territory.

I don't know how you would react in this exercise. Think about it.

You can defend your borders in different ways in different situations. The ability to say "no" (without the subsequent sprinkling of ashes on the head!) Is an important personality skill. It is necessary for those who easily succumb to pressure, aggression and other "honest ways of taking money."

The ability to create and protect one's own boundaries, of course, is formed even by parents. But over the course of life (and with different people), boundaries can change many times. Teenagers, for example, protect them militantly, they need this life period in order to separate from their parents and learn to build their own lives on their own, to respect themselves. And couples in love sometimes completely dissolve in each other, and only then they begin to notice that it has become crowded. If you do not revise the rules of interaction in time, do not outline the circle of your interests, then the couple comes to a crisis or even breaks up.

Like any other skill, the ability to see and respect one's own and others' boundaries may well be mastered at a later period of time.

How to defend your territory

How do you react to a yelling boss? Do you get nervous before public speaking? Are you able to refuse requests from loved ones if they are inconvenient for you? Do children have the right to disagree with you, to close in their room? How do you feel when your spouse (or best friend) said something “wrong”? Do you want to suggest, correct, give a cuff, shame, do you think that the actions of loved ones “dishonor your reputation”?

The skill of respecting other people's boundaries is, first of all, allowing other people to be different from you. A good aphorism caught my eye recently: “Selfishness is not when you do what you want. This is when you are sure that others should do what YOU want. When you want to "do good" to someone - that is, to help, give advice, stand up for someone, correct the situation - pause and look around. Does this violate someone's interests, does it plunge your counterpart into a position of helplessness and dependence? Have you been asked for this help? Does the person really need this kind of help?

The main feature of "healthy" boundaries is their flexibility.

If you know how to move away from situations that are dangerous or unpleasant for you (if not physically, then at least emotionally!),

If you can, depending on the situation, open up for the "import" and "export" of resources, adequately use the words “yes” and “no”,

if you find it comfortable and safe to get close to the people you choose,

if you are able to consider both your own interests and the interests of others,

then your relationships with people become much more simple, honest and pleasant.

everything you need to know. Signs of violation of boundaries in a relationship

For our Slavic mentality, the word "border" is associated with a high fence under barbed wire and does not fit in with close, trusting relationships between a man and a woman .

What are the boundaries between spouses? This is mine, dear, I do what I want.

In fact, it is precisely this position that destroys 80% of families. Even if the border violators do not divorce each other for some good reason, then as a family they cease to exist.

Why boundaries are important in relationships

Establishing clear personal boundaries is the key to a mutually respectful, caring relationship.

Relationship boundaries are a kind of measure of self-esteem. If people are confident in themselves and their partner, then it will not be difficult for them to respect someone else's freedom.

This is a kind of code of conduct that will make both people feel comfortable. They reduce the risk of conflict situations, outbursts of anger and aggression. By setting clear rules , no one will feel humiliated or infringed, no one will manipulate and take advantage of the kindness of their partner. Everything is as fair and transparent as possible.

Now many have begun to talk about boundaries in relationships, but few understand the meaning of this meaning. Some confuse this with rudeness and permissiveness. Others - brazenly shake the rights, without giving anything in return.

Signs of violation of boundaries in a relationship

Look closely at your couple. Perhaps there is already a clear violation of the boundaries in the relationship between you:

  • Incomprehensible situations often arise between you, insults, reproaches .
  • Your girlfriend demands more time for her than you can.
  • You are always available, you rush to answer her call, even if you are very busy, you never stay late after work, even for a good reason.
  • She rarely praises you and often criticizes you .
  • Next to your girlfriend you feel ashamed, guilty of everything.

If you agree with at least some of these points, then you need to urgently set the boundaries of what is permitted in the relationship before the situation goes too far.

If you have healthy self-respect, then you yourself will not allow yourself to be humiliated and manipulated by a lady. Women feel strong men and understand that they need to be respected.

Family charter

Every public place, wherever we go, has its own rules that must be strictly observed. They may be unspoken, but most often they are written in large letters at the entrance. Violated - pay a large fine. And everyone is happy with this, treats with understanding, do not argue and do not resent. But there are no warning signs on the threshold of your own apartment, do what you want and you will get nothing for it. That doesn't happen. At the very least, this is wrong and strange.

Starting to build a relationship with a girl, first of all, you need to carefully read the “instruction”, this will save you from unnecessary problems.

Take time for everyone to write down the things that are categorically unacceptable in a relationship. Write down everything, down to the smallest, intimate details. Sometimes even a cute nickname becomes a stumbling block.

Once you have identified the problems, consider how you can motivate the other person to follow these rules. Write down the system of penalties and rewards. Building boundaries in a relationship can be a lot of fun and positive, especially if you get creative and out of the box.

Remember that your family charter can be changed from time to time, as long as it is agreed with the other person. Don't be afraid to say "no" to unreasonable requests and insults disguised as humor. First you need to understand how to defend your boundaries in a relationship, and then gradually expand these boundaries, independently control your behavior so as not to overstep the feelings of another person.

This work on yourself may take more than one year, but the experience gained will be useful to you not only in family relationships, but also in society. No one likes a boundary trespasser, so you need to change your habits and attitude towards others.

Method of "Five"

At first, it is very difficult to understand how to properly build boundaries in a relationship. No one wants to be like a bore who constantly yells at others and teaches them about life.

To make it easier for you to understand this, use the Rule of Five:

  • Write down five things that you categorically do not accept in relation to yourself, for example, unreasonable criticism, discussing intimate topics with friends, and so on.
  • Write down five things you want your girlfriend to do. For example, she regularly visited the gym, warned if she was late, cooked breakfast.
  • List five phrases that you do not want to hear in your address, for example: "You are a weakling", "Someone is better (smarter, richer)", "Don't even try, you still won't succeed. "

Over time, your boundaries may need to be revised and updated. A new job or the birth of a child can change the situation. The redistribution of your boundaries should always be based not on the idea of ​​"I want to please everyone", but on the rule "I value my time and want to keep some for myself."

Keep in mind that if from the very beginning you indulged your girlfriend in everything, silently endured insults and insults, then it will be difficult for her to accept new boundaries in the relationship between a man and a woman.

She is used to being a dominant sadist, everything suits her and why invent something new? Every change in life has its price, sometimes it's parting with former friends or a girlfriend. Do not be afraid of this, only the weak and fragile break.

If your relationship withstands all the changes, then it will definitely become stronger and more reliable.

Boundary tactics

Boundaries are a way to take care of yourself. When we set limits on behavior, we get less angry and resentful because our needs are being met. Borders make communication between a man and a woman more transparent, without secret signs, hints, tricks.

You know what you want from your girlfriend, just like she knows what to expect from you. Boundaries are the basis for happy, healthy relationships.

How to build boundaries in relationships

Since we are a project that is against theory, and categorically FOR the practical application of any knowledge, let's figure out what exactly to do.

How to build boundaries in relationships:

  1. Be consistent in your decision. Do not give up, otherwise the woman will understand that you can be manipulated and as a result everything will remain the same.
  2. Keep your rules as simple and specific as possible. No ambiguous and common phrases that can be understood in different ways.
  3. Always remain calm, even at critical moments when the relationship is under threat. Now is not the time for emotions, you need to show your maturity, awareness and confidence in your own decisions.
  4. Learn to take responsibility for conflict situations, rather than blaming other people.
  5. If you need to compromise on something, then be flexible, but not a rag. Consider every decision you make, because you will have to live by these rules. Do not agree with what seems wrong or impossible to you.

In the competent drawing up of rules, you need to understand how to set boundaries in relationships so that they suit everyone, and not just you.

First of all, discuss the key points with the girl:

  • Your general expectations from this relationship.
  • Your emotional tolerances. Everyone has different thresholds for physical pain, and the same goes for emotions. You need to immediately clarify what you do not allow (screaming, lies, betrayal, distrust).
  • Sexual preferences.
  • Financial matters.
  • Your past.
  • Family (relations with parents, brothers, sisters).
  • Friends with whom you are going to keep in touch.
  • Your goals in life.
  • Attitude towards the household, distribution of household duties.
  • Attitude towards children and pets.
  • Personal and joint time.
  • Internet, online games, dating sites, social networks.
  • The boundaries of what is acceptable in communication with the opposite sex.

Tactics of building boundaries with a toxic woman

Ideally, all well-mannered, adequate people themselves know how to observe and respect our boundaries. They do not need to be taught and explained anything, it is enough to clearly state their rules once, this will be enough.

But, unfortunately, some girls do their best to oppose your rules, demonstrate their superiority and completely submit to their will.

Signs of boundary violations in a relationship:

  1. Lack of respect for you as a man. This can manifest itself in cruel jokes, insults, discussions with strangers, humiliating remarks addressed to you.
  2. You are afraid to talk about your feelings and desires, you prefer to keep silent so as not to make her hysterical.
  3. Your own priorities always come second. Only she decides where you will go to dinner, with whom you will be friends, what house to buy and how many children to give birth to.
  4. You can't say no without feeling guilty. You have to constantly apologize and make amends with generous gifts.
  5. You have no right to demand from your girlfriend a clean shirt, a delicious dinner, cleanliness in the house. But he must constantly fulfill his masculine duties, be generous, kind, romantic.
  6. You can't have your own opinion. The girl is the only generator of ideas in your couple, and you are just a conscientious performer.
  7. You feel completely defenseless against her physical and emotional aggression.
  8. You understand that your relationship does not bring you the desired happiness and moral satisfaction.

Toxic women are always malicious violators of other people's boundaries , boldly using all known female manipulations. At the same time, they are almost always very beautiful and sexy, they can easily enslave men and completely devastate their energy and financial reserves.

Next to such a fatal beauty, men begin to feel worse, lose strength, are in constant tension and emotional exhaustion.

Who is a toxic woman and how to deal with her

Toxic ladies have the following characteristics:

  • A wonderful actress and professional liar.
  • Always uses other people's kindness for his own purposes.
  • A vicious border trespasser.
  • Manipulator.
  • Easily humiliates men without feeling embarrassed.
  • Does not support or encourage other people's endeavors.
  • Never considers the feelings and needs of other people.
  • Always right. 9009four
  • Often angry, envious and aggressive.
  • Almost never apologizes.
  • Blames others for their own failures and never takes responsibility.
  • Energy vampire.
  • She has a lot of problems and drama in her life, but she doesn't want to change anything.
  • There are no rules or prohibitions for her.
  • Talks all the time and never listens.

If you are "lucky" to meet such a difficult, destructive lady, then you must clearly understand how to defend your boundaries in a relationship:

  1. Keep your distance and don't get lost in this relationship. Always leave time for communication with friends, relatives, separate rest.
  2. Do not rush to propose to her and have children together, even if she insists on it.
  3. Try to keep your life, schedule, habits as they were before you met her.
  4. Even if your lady is against cooperating, you still have to make and announce a list of your personal boundaries.
  5. Choose the best time to discuss this. Be prepared for the fact that this conversation will be unpleasant. A girl can openly ridicule your rules or throw a tantrum, manipulate tears or refuse to have sex.
  6. Do not give in to provocation. As soon as you see that the situation is getting out of hand, stop talking, come back to it later.
  7. Start small. Enter no more than five rules, but strictly follow their implementation. Enter your system of penalties and rewards.
  8. Know how to show strength and perseverance at the right time. If you show your own weakness, you will finally lose control of the situation.
  9. Be prepared for the fact that the toxic beauty will not withstand such a re-education and will run away to another, more accommodating guy. In this case, it remains only to wish good luck to her new victim and find a smart, adequate girl who will respect your personal space.

Once you understand how to set boundaries in a relationship, your girlfriend will start to respect and appreciate you more.

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