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You wake up in the morning and realize that your boyfriend, who is lying next to you in bed, is engaged in self-gratification. Do you want to tell him: “Baby, what about me”? And in general, how to behave in such a situation and why do men masturbate in general, even if they are in a relationship?

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intimate life

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According to statistics, about 80 percent of men and almost 50 percent of women masturbate. In fact, the numbers are higher. Today we are not talking about women. But they are often concerned with the question: why do men like to masturbate? And when they notice their boyfriend having an onanism session, they begin to worry themselves: “My boyfriend is no longer interested in me, he doesn’t like sex with me!”

Why do men often masturbate? Yes, if only because men and women perceive sex differently Men can do this to relieve stress, and women can do it to find harmony with their partner. 0003

But why does he masturbate, instead of waking up a living, beloved and seemingly usually desired girl sleeping next to him?

Because ... wants to masturbate

"I confess, I have this sexual fantasy: the girl woke up, caught me and ... joined!" Roman (25)

Why do guys masturbate? Because it one of the erotic fantasies that they do not dare to say out loud. But if the girl herself is not averse to taking the initiative and starting first, such a process can diversify intimate life. And most importantly, it will allow you to be closer to each other, show more trust.

“This happened to me during the preparation for the case - when I planned to wake the girl up with sex or cunnilingus. But in the process I got carried away, with whom it does not happen. Another possible reason is that the girl herself is a sexual fantasy. It's nice to look at her, it's nice to dream about her. In any case, such a situation is a manifestation of a man's trust in a woman. If I didn’t trust, I went to the bathroom. So not "Why didn't you wake me up?!", but "Do you mind if I join?" Valery (28)

Masturbation as self-love

In Holland, for example, masturbation is considered extremely important. There is even a Rotterdam Center for Self-Satisfaction, where self-love is studied as a science. Students are taught theory and applied disciplines, such as "Masturbation and aesthetic pleasure" or "Contemplation of natural landscapes during masturbation." Why do men masturbate? In this country, such a piquant topic became the subject of research by scientists who saw important psychological aspects in male self-satisfaction. There is no other country in the world with such concern for men's health.

Because ... cares

Why do men want to masturbate? As ironic as it may sound, sometimes they do it out of love and respect for their partner. And what if she has “those days” and she definitely doesn’t have time for sex, but a man needs a release? That's when they, too, can resort to self-satisfaction.

“If a wife runs so much during the day that she is unlikely to be able to fully indulge in sex at night, I won’t wake her up. But if it's not, I try to stir it up. Soft". Marat (29)

Male animals also masturbate. Porcupines in a state of sexual arousal walk on three legs, and the fourth is kept on the genitals. An elephant stimulates a semi-erect penis with its trunk. Even if self-satisfaction is inherent in animals by nature, then what can we say about people. It is not always possible to find bad sides in this process. Sometimes a man, being in a relationship, satisfies himself for the sake of taking care of his beloved.

Because ... has the right to masturbate

“For men, masturbation is an expression of freedom: he wanted to have sex with his woman, he wanted to have sex with himself. If a girl often reproaches him for this (they say, you have me!), She may lose her beloved. Don't encroach on our rights!" Eugene (27)

Masturbation is a legal right

According to the definition of the World Health Organization, masturbation is "the legal right of a person to give himself pleasure and dispose of his own body." Therefore, before asking the question: "Why do men want to masturbate?", remember that everyone has the right to dispose of his body and his desires.

Because...wants to relieve stress quickly

“Masturbation is a way to relieve stress. And quite energy-intensive: no need to involve the girl, think about her pleasure, puff and move. It's just you, your hand, and here it is - detente. Igor (32)

Why do men masturbate? Yes, the representatives of the stronger sex have such a feature. They can relieve stress in two ways - sex or alcohol. Everyone chooses what he likes. In favor of self-satisfaction is the fact that he requires less various costs from a man. There is no need to persuade a woman to have intimacy, create a suitable atmosphere, waste time on foreplay. I just went to the toilet, took out my "unit", a few minutes and the discharge was received.

“It's faster and sometimes more enjoyable, especially if you're tired, than having sex. He jerked the shutter and with a sense of satisfaction (including moral) - to sleep! But just “masturbating a girl” (waking her up for an erection) is much more disrespectful. Mikhail (31)

Millions of people masturbate

Don't be surprised when you wonder why a man masturbates. In fact, 50 million people masturbate every second in the world! And if you saw your boyfriend in the process of self-satisfaction, just mentally write in this list of perfectly normal people who needed a quick discharge at that moment.

Because ...likes and/or is lazy

“I often masturbate when my partner is asleep. Often after sex. Why? Yes, because I love doing it. For no particular reason." Gennady, (27)

Why men masturbate even when in a relationship with the woman they love. Simply because they enjoy the process. And they see no other reasons for masturbation.

“Do you want to be honest? Sometimes too lazy to strain. Sex is more than an hour, and then you still need to wash, smoke. And get up early for work. And not all women like being woken up.” Denis (32)

Men in relationships often masturbate

Men in stable relationships masturbate more often than women in relationships. Why do men masturbate? The answers are above. You should not make a big deal out of molehills when the partner's relationship is still strong and he talks about his love. He likes self-satisfaction, which means that he considers it necessary for his body.

Because... the girl refused

It happened to me when a girl refused sex. She lies all so beautiful, half asleep and absolutely uninterested in my erection. Well, what to do? Just masturbate! Kirill, (31)

Why do men want to masturbate? But this is the very case when the reason may be in the woman herself. She showed no interest in her partner, turned out to be not interested in intimacy, rudely responded to his offer to have sex. And the guy has nothing left but self-satisfaction.

A woman rarely wants sex so-and-so, that she is ready to sacrifice sleep and a rested appearance in the morning, but a man - easily. Well, since she refused and is sleeping, then I will be alone with myself. Maxim, (27)

Masturbation as a threat to relationships

Why does a man masturbate? Because he lacks intimacy, tenderness, care, attention and corny - sex. Sexual dissatisfaction can be a serious threat to a relationship. Experts put this reason on a par with psychological incompatibility, which, according to statistics, most often leads to divorce.

"The reason is simple: I had an erection, but I didn't wake up the miracle that was sniffing next to me." Andrey (37 )

But if a partner often refuses offers of sex, a man may start thinking about what he can find himself and another woman.

Why does a man masturbate: what do women say

How do girls react when they find their beloved doing an interesting activity? They... are silent. Why a guy masturbates remains a mystery to her. She begins to imagine that he has another, he has taken a mistress. But the lack of knowledge of how to be in such a situation creates an awkward situation. And women are really just silent and don't know how to behave.

Women are silent

“When I realized that my husband lying next to me was masturbating, I wanted to. .. joke. But she resisted, remembering that laughter and sex are not always compatible. I waited for him to finish and fell asleep." Tatyana, (26)

I convinced myself that it seemed to me. After all, it can't be that he masturbates instead of waking me up! Especially since we just went to bed.” Ekaterina, (24)

When a guy masturbates, women get involved in the process

“I am absolutely calm about the fact that my man masturbates - it means that at the moment he has chosen this type of pleasure. I also have different desires. And if I want, I can just join.” Ekaterina, (23)

“I think the best option in such a situation is to help my MCH, as much as I have enough vigor (I’m awake!) And fantasy.” Lina, (24)

Fortunately, many women are able to understand their partner and avoid unnecessary questions: “Why does my boyfriend masturbate?”

Ask questions

“I was a bit taken aback when I found him masturbating. But she did not think of anything, but simply asked why. He honestly answered that he woke up from sexual arousal, began to pester me, but I refused through a dream, and he didn’t go to the bathroom, because it’s more pleasant to do this when there is a half-naked beloved nearby. After this frank conversation, we had great sex. And now, when he suddenly wakes up in the middle of the night, he always wakes me up.” Tatyana, (27)

And sometimes a right and timely question, as well as an honest answer to it, allows a couple to become closer. Why a man masturbates - found out. Found the reasons. And got rid of them.

Everyone understands

“I don't mind. And I even admit that he, lying next to me, fantasizes about the other. The main thing is not to go to this other person in reality. His fantasies are part of his personal space, which cannot be deprived of. Evgenia, (30)

Why do men masturbate? Yes, sometimes in their fantasies they imagine another woman, for example, a famous actress. But that doesn't mean the guy is cheating.

Happy when a guy masturbates

Why does a guy masturbate? Because he cares about his partner and does not want to wake her up? And why does a woman, noticing him in the process of self-satisfaction, not ask questions? Because she understood without words and does not want to start explaining how terribly tired she was during the day, and that she has no time for sex?

“I was glad he didn't wake me up. That day I was tired, I was exhausted. Well done for not bothering me." Lika, (30)

“I distinguish between making love for feelings and masturbation for stress relief. It would be unpleasant for me if he woke me not for the sake of love, but for the sake of his desire to "blow off steam." Alena, (29)

They get indignant when a guy masturbates

“I think it’s right to be indignant out loud, but not to offend: “Why didn’t you wake me up? You know, I always want you!” Marina, (22)

Such words are surely pleasant for every man. And to the question - why do men masturbate, there is one answer: because there is not always mutual understanding with their partner.

They answer the same

“We have the opposite. Sometimes it’s me who can’t sleep and pornographic thoughts come into my head. It's a shame to wake up your husband. It would be better if three kingpins fall in love with me in fantasies than I disturb him.” Alina, (27)

Women are not alien to self-satisfaction. If you wonder why guys masturbate, it can be redirected to girls too, because women do it too.

Scientific causes of male masturbation

Why does a man masturbate? Sexologist Valery Saltykov believes that the absolute number of sexually mature men are prone to self-satisfaction, and they do it if possible, and not at will, as is commonly believed. And he adds that a man will begin to masturbate even if he has two permanent sexual partners. Either a low sexual need or religious taboos can make him neglect self-satisfaction.

Alena August, psychotherapist, VIP coach, says: “I can say one thing for sure: no one should worry, but you can and should think about why this is happening. Why does a man masturbate and when should you worry about it?

1. It should be remembered that masturbation for a man is an easy way to relieve stress. Why is he not doing this with his beloved? Because a girl needs kisses and caresses, assurances of feelings and gentle words, an aura and an atmosphere. Masturbation, on the other hand, guarantees an "ambulance" without candles, roses and champagne. That's why guys masturbate even when they have a regular partner.

1. Sex with a partner and other ways of satisfaction coexist perfectly in the mind and life of a man. And here, believe me, we are not talking about competition. Love is love, and the desire to experience an orgasm is a separate issue.

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