How to make a couple


Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship

love & friendship

Want to feel loved and connected to your partner? These tips can help you build and keep a romantic relationship that’s healthy, happy, and satisfying.

Building a healthy relationship

All romantic relationships go through ups and downs and they all take work, commitment, and a willingness to adapt and change with your partner. But whether your relationship is just starting out or you’ve been together for years, there are steps you can take to build a healthy relationship. Even if you’ve experienced a lot of failed relationships in the past or have struggled before to rekindle the fires of romance in your current relationship, you can find ways to stay connected, find fulfillment, and enjoy lasting happiness.

What makes a healthy relationship?

Every relationship is unique, and people come together for many different reasons. Part of what defines a healthy relationship is sharing a common goal for exactly what you want the relationship to be and where you want it to go. And that’s something you’ll only know by talking deeply and honestly with your partner.

However, there are also some characteristics that most healthy relationships have in common. Knowing these basic principles can help keep your relationship meaningful, fulfilling and exciting whatever goals you’re working towards or challenges you’re facing together.

You maintain a meaningful emotional connection with each other. You each make the other feel loved and emotionally fulfilled. There’s a difference between being loved and feeling loved. When you feel loved, it makes you feel accepted and valued by your partner, like someone truly gets you. Some relationships get stuck in peaceful coexistence, but without the partners truly relating to each other emotionally. While the union may seem stable on the surface, a lack of ongoing involvement and emotional connection serves only to add distance between two people.

You’re not afraid of (respectful) disagreement. Some couples talk things out quietly, while others may raise their voices and passionately disagree. The key in a strong relationship, though, is not to be fearful of conflict. You need to feel safe to express things that bother you without fear of retaliation, and be able to resolve conflict without humiliation, degradation, or insisting on being right.

You keep outside relationships and interests alive.Despite the claims of romantic fiction or movies, no one person can meet all of your needs. In fact, expecting too much from your partner can put unhealthy pressure on a relationship. To stimulate and enrich your romantic relationship, it’s important to sustain your own identity outside of the relationship, preserve connections with family and friends, and maintain your hobbies and interests.

[Read: Making Good Friends]

You communicate openly and honestly. Good communication is a key part of any relationship. When both people know what they want from the relationship and feel comfortable expressing their needs, fears, and desires, it can increase trust and strengthen the bond between you.

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Falling in love vs. staying in love

For most people, falling in love usually seems to just happen. It’s staying in love—or preserving that “falling in love” experience—that requires commitment and work. Given its rewards, though, it’s well worth the effort. A healthy, secure romantic relationship can serve as an ongoing source of support and happiness in your life, through good times and bad, strengthening all aspects of your wellbeing. By taking steps now to preserve or rekindle your falling in love experience, you can build a meaningful relationship that lasts—even for a lifetime.

Many couples focus on their relationship only when there are specific, unavoidable problems to overcome. Once the problems have been resolved they often switch their attention back to their careers, kids, or other interests. However, romantic relationships require ongoing attention and commitment for love to flourish. As long as the health of a romantic relationship remains important to you, it is going to require your attention and effort. And identifying and fixing a small problem in your relationship now can often help prevent it from growing into a much larger one down road.

The following tips can help you to preserve that falling in love experience and keep your romantic relationship healthy.

Tip 1: Spend quality time face to face

You fall in love looking at and listening to each other. If you continue to look and listen in the same attentive ways, you can sustain the falling in love experience over the long term. You probably have fond memories of when you were first dating your loved one. Everything seemed new and exciting, and you likely spent hours just chatting together or coming up with new, exciting things to try. However, as time goes by, the demands of work, family, other obligations, and the need we all have for time to ourselves can make it harder to find time together.

Many couples find that the face-to-face contact of their early dating days is gradually replaced by hurried texts, emails, and instant messages. While digital communication is great for some purposes, it doesn’t positively impact your brain and nervous system in the same way as face-to-face communication. Sending a text or a voice message to your partner saying “I love you” is great, but if you rarely look at them or have the time to sit down together, they’ll still feel you don’t understand or appreciate them. And you’ll become more distanced or disconnected as a couple. The emotional cues you both need to feel loved can only be conveyed in person, so no matter how busy life gets, it’s important to carve out time to spend together.

Commit to spending some quality time together on a regular basis. No matter how busy you are, take a few minutes each day to put aside your electronic devices, stop thinking about other things, and really focus on and connect with your partner.

Find something that you enjoy doing together, whether it is a shared hobby, dance class, daily walk, or sitting over a cup of coffee in the morning.

Try something new together. Doing new things together can be a fun way to connect and keep things interesting. It can be as simple as trying a new restaurant or going on a day trip to a place you’ve never been before.

Focus on having fun together. Couples are often more fun and playful in the early stages of a relationship. However, this playful attitude can sometimes be forgotten as life challenges start getting in the way or old resentments start building up. Keeping a sense of humor can actually help you get through tough times, reduce stress and work through issues more easily. Think about playful ways to surprise your partner, like bringing flowers home or unexpectedly booking a table at their favorite restaurant. Playing with pets or small children can also help you reconnect with your playful side.

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Tip 2: Stay connected through communication

Good communication is a fundamental part of a healthy relationship. When you experience a positive emotional connection with your partner, you feel safe and happy. When people stop communicating well, they stop relating well, and times of change or stress can really bring out the disconnect. It may sound simplistic, but as long as you are communicating, you can usually work through whatever problems you’re facing.

Tell your partner what you need, don't make them guess.

It’s not always easy to talk about what you need. For one, many of us don’t spend enough time thinking about what’s really important to us in a relationship. And even if you do know what you need, talking about it can make you feel vulnerable, embarrassed, or even ashamed. But look at it from your partner’s point of view. Providing comfort and understanding to someone you love is a pleasure, not a burden.

[Read: Effective Communication]

If you’ve known each other for a while, you may assume that your partner has a pretty good idea of what you are thinking and what you need. However, your partner is not a mind-reader. While your partner may have some idea, it is much healthier to express your needs directly to avoid any confusion.

Your partner may sense something, but it might not be what you need. What’s more, people change, and what you needed and wanted five years ago, for example, may be very different now. So instead of letting resentment, misunderstanding, or anger grow when your partner continually gets it wrong, get in the habit of telling them exactly what you need.

Take note of your partner's nonverbal cues

So much of our communication is transmitted by what we don’t say. Nonverbal cues, which include eye contact, tone of voice, posture, and gestures such as leaning forward, crossing your arms, or touching someone’s hand, communicate much more than words.

When you can pick up on your partner’s nonverbal cues or “body language,” you’ll be able to tell how they really feel and be able to respond accordingly. For a relationship to work well, each person has to understand their own and their partner’s nonverbal cues. Your partner’s responses may be different from yours. For example, one person might find a hug after a stressful day a loving mode of communication—while another might just want to take a walk together or sit and chat.

It’s also important to make sure that what you say matches your body language. If you say “I’m fine,” but you clench your teeth and look away, then your body is clearly signaling you are anything but “fine.”

When you experience positive emotional cues from your partner, you feel loved and happy, and when you send positive emotional cues, your partner feels the same. When you stop taking an interest in your own or your partner’s emotions, you’ll damage the connection between you and your ability to communicate will suffer, especially during stressful times.

Be a good listener

While a great deal of emphasis in our society is put on talking, if you can learn to listen in a way that makes another person feel valued and understood, you can build a deeper, stronger connection between you.

There’s a big difference between listening in this way and simply hearing. When you really listen—when you’re engaged with what’s being said—you’ll hear the subtle intonations in your partner’s voice that tells you how they’re really feeling and the emotions they’re trying to communicate. Being a good listener doesn't mean you have to agree with your partner or change your mind. But it will help you find common points of view that can help you to resolve conflict.

Tip 3: Keep physical intimacy alive

Touch is a fundamental part of human existence. Studies on infants have shown the importance of regular, affectionate contact for brain development. And the benefits don’t end in childhood. Affectionate contact boosts the body’s levels of oxytocin, a hormone that influences bonding and attachment.

While sex is often a cornerstone of a committed relationship, it shouldn’t be the only method of physical intimacy. Frequent, affectionate touch—holding hands, hugging, kissing—is equally important.

[Read: Better Sex as You Age]

Of course, it’s important to be sensitive to what your partner likes. Unwanted touching or inappropriate overtures can make the other person tense up and retreat—exactly what you don’t want. As with so many other aspects of a healthy relationship, this can come down to how well you communicate your needs and intentions with your partner.

Even if you have pressing workloads or young children to worry about, you can help to keep physical intimacy alive by carving out some regular couple time, whether that’s in the form of a date night or simply an hour at the end of the day when you can sit and talk or hold hands.

Tip 4: Learn to give and take in your relationship

If you expect to get what you want 100% of the time in a relationship, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Healthy relationships are built on compromise. However, it takes work on each person’s part to make sure that there is a reasonable exchange.

Recognize what’s important to your partner

Knowing what is truly important to your partner can go a long way towards building goodwill and an atmosphere of compromise. On the flip side, it’s also important for your partner to recognize your wants and for you to state them clearly. Constantly giving to others at the expense of your own needs will only build resentment and anger.

Don’t make “winning” your goal

If you approach your partner with the attitude that things have to be your way or else, it will be difficult to reach a compromise. Sometimes this attitude comes from not having your needs met while younger, or it could be years of accumulated resentment in the relationship reaching a boiling point. It’s alright to have strong convictions about something, but your partner deserves to be heard as well. Be respectful of the other person and their viewpoint.

Learn how to respectfully resolve conflict

Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but to keep a relationship strong, both people need to feel they’ve been heard. The goal is not to win but to maintain and strengthen the relationship.

Make sure you are fighting fair. Keep the focus on the issue at hand and respect the other person. Don’t start arguments over things that cannot be changed.

Don’t attack someone directly but use “I” statements to communicate how you feel. For example, instead of saying, “You make me feel bad” try “I feel bad when you do that”.

Don’t drag old arguments into the mix. Rather than looking to past conflicts or grudges and assigning blame, focus on what you can do in the here-and-now to solve the problem.

Be willing to forgive. Resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others.

If tempers flare, take a break. Take a few minutes to relieve stress and calm down before you say or do something you’ll regret. Always remember that you’re arguing with the person you love.

Know when to let something go. If you can’t come to an agreement, agree to disagree. It takes two people to keep an argument going. If a conflict is going nowhere, you can choose to disengage and move on.

Tip 5: Be prepared for ups and downs

It’s important to recognize that there are ups and downs in every relationship. You won’t always be on the same page. Sometimes one partner may be struggling with an issue that stresses them, such as the death of a close family member. Other events, like job loss or severe health problems, can affect both partners and make it difficult to relate to each other. You might have different ideas of managing finances or raising children.

Different people cope with stress differently, and misunderstandings can rapidly turn to frustration and anger.

[Read: Surviving Tough Times by Building Resilience]

Don’t take out your problems on your partner. Life stresses can make us short tempered. If you are coping with a lot of stress, it might seem easier to vent with your partner, and even feel safer to snap at them. Fighting like this might initially feel like a release, but it slowly poisons your relationship. Find other healthier ways to manage your stress, anger, and frustration.

Trying to force a solution can cause even more problems. Every person works through problems and issues in their own way. Remember that you’re a team. Continuing to move forward together can get you through the rough spots.

Look back to the early stages of your relationship. Share the moments that brought the two of you together, examine the point at which you began to drift apart, and resolve how you can work together to rekindle that falling in love experience.

Be open to change. Change is inevitable in life, and it will happen whether you go with it or fight it. Flexibility is essential to adapt to the change that is always taking place in any relationship, and it allows you to grow together through both the good times and the bad.

If you need outside help for your relationship, reach out together. Sometimes problems in a relationship can seem too complex or overwhelming for you to handle as a couple. Couples therapy or talking together with a trusted friend or religious figure can help.

Authors: Lawrence Robinson, Melinda Smith, M. A., and Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.

Am I in a Healthy Relationship? – Article aimed at teens to determine if your relationship is as healthy as it should be. (TeensHealth)

Help with Relationships – Articles addressing common relationship problems, such as arguments and conflict, communication, and infidelity. (Relate UK)

Last updated: November 1, 2022

Conflict Resolution Skills - HelpGuide.org

communication

Whatever the cause of disagreements and disputes at home or work, these skills can help you resolve conflict in a constructive way and keep your relationships strong and growing.

What is conflict?

Conflict is a normal part of any healthy relationship. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything, all the time. The key is not to fear or try to avoid conflict but to learn how to resolve it in a healthy way.

When conflict is mismanaged, it can cause great harm to a relationship, but when handled in a respectful, positive way, conflict provides an opportunity to strengthen the bond between two people. Whether you’re experiencing conflict at home, work, or school, learning these skills can help you resolve differences in a healthy way and build stronger, more rewarding relationships.

Causes of conflict in a relationship

Conflict arises from differences, both large and small. It occurs whenever people disagree over their values, motivations, perceptions, ideas, or desires. Sometimes these differences appear trivial, but when a conflict triggers strong feelings, a deep personal need is often at the core of the problem. These needs can range from the need to feel safe and secure or respected and valued, to the need for greater closeness and intimacy.

Think about the opposing needs of a toddler and a parent. The child’s need is to explore, so venturing to the street or the cliff edge meets that need. But the parent's need is to protect the child’s safety, a need that can only be met by limiting the toddler’s exploration. Since these needs are at odds, conflict arises.

The needs of each party play an important role in the long-term success of a relationship. Each deserves respect and consideration. In personal relationships, a lack of understanding about differing needs can result in distance, arguments, and break-ups. In the workplace, differing needs can result in broken deals, decreased profits, and lost jobs.

[Read: Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship]

When you can recognize conflicting needs and are willing to examine them with compassion and understanding, it can lead to creative problem solving, team building, and stronger relationships.

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How do you respond to conflict?

Do you fear conflict or avoid it at all costs? If your perception of conflict comes from painful memories from early childhood or previous unhealthy relationships, you may expect all disagreements to end badly. You may view conflict as demoralizing, humiliating, or something to fear. If your early life experiences left you feeling powerless or out of control, conflict may even be traumatizing for you.

If you're afraid of conflict, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you enter a conflict situation already feeling threatened, it's tough to deal with the problem at hand in a healthy way. Instead, you're more likely to either shut down or blow up in anger.

Healthy and unhealthy ways of managing and resolving conflict
Unhealthy responses to conflict:Healthy responses to conflict:
An inability to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other person. The capacity to empathize with the other person's viewpoint.
Explosive, angry, hurtful, and resentful reactions.Calm, non-defensive, and respectful reactions.
The withdrawal of love, resulting in rejection, isolation, shaming, and fear of abandonment.A readiness to forgive and forget, and to move past the conflict without holding resentments or anger.
An inability to compromise or see the other person's side.The ability to seek compromise and avoid punishing.
Feeling fearful or avoiding conflict; expecting a bad outcome.A belief that facing conflict head on is the best thing for both sides.

Conflict resolution, stress, and emotions

Conflict triggers strong emotions and can lead to hurt feelings, disappointment, and discomfort. When handled in an unhealthy manner, it can cause irreparable rifts, resentments, and break-ups. But when conflict is resolved in a healthy way, it increases your understanding of the other person, builds trust, and strengthens your relationships.

If you are out of touch with your feelings or so stressed that you can only pay attention to a limited number of emotions, you won't be able to understand your own needs. This will make it hard to communicate with others and establish what's really troubling you. For example, couples often argue about petty differences—the way she hangs the towels, the way he slurps his soup—rather than what is really bothering them.

To successfully resolve a conflict, you need to learn and practice two core skills:

  1. Quick stress relief: the ability to quickly relieve stress in the moment.
  2. Emotional awareness: the ability to remain comfortable enough with your emotions to react in constructive ways, even in the midst of a perceived attack.

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Core skill 1: Quick stress relief

Being able to manage and relieve stress in the moment is the key to staying balanced, focused, and in control, no matter what challenges you face. If you don't know how to stay centered and in control of yourself, you will become overwhelmed in conflict situations and unable to respond in healthy ways.

Psychologist Connie Lillas uses a driving analogy to describe the three most common ways people respond when they're overwhelmed by stress:

Foot on the gas. An angry or agitated stress response. You're heated, keyed up, overly emotional, and unable to sit still.

Foot on the brake. A withdrawn or depressed stress response. You shut down, space out, and show very little energy or emotion.

Foot on both gas and brake. A tense and frozen stress response. You “freeze” under pressure and can't do anything. You look paralyzed, but under the surface you're extremely agitated.

How stress affects conflict resolution

Stress interferes with the ability to resolve conflict by limiting your ability to:

  • Accurately read another person's body language.
  • Hear what someone is really saying.
  • Be aware of your own feelings.
  • Be in touch with your own, deep-rooted needs.
  • Communicate your needs clearly.

Is stress a problem for you?

You may be so used to feeling stressed that you're not even aware you are stressed. Stress may pose a problem in your life if you identify with the following:

  • You often feel tense or tight somewhere in your body.
  • You're not aware of movement in your chest or stomach when you breathe.
  • Conflict absorbs your time and attention.

Core skill 2: Emotional awareness

Emotional awareness is the key to understanding yourself and others. If you don't know how or why you feel a certain way, you won't be able to communicate effectively or resolve disagreements.

[Read: Improving Emotional Intelligence]

Although knowing your own feelings may sound simple, many people ignore or try to sedate strong emotions like anger, sadness, and fear. Your ability to handle conflict, however, depends on being connected to these feelings. If you're afraid of strong emotions or if you insist on finding solutions that are strictly rational, your ability to face and resolve differences will be limited.

Why emotional awareness is a key factor in resolving conflict

Emotional awareness—the consciousness of your moment-to-moment emotional experience—and the ability to manage all of your feelings appropriately, is the basis of a communication process that can resolve conflict.

Emotional awareness helps you to:

  • Understand what is really troubling other people
  • Understand yourself, including what is really troubling you
  • Stay motivated until the conflict is resolved
  • Communicate clearly and effectively
  • Interest and influence others

Assessing your level of emotional awareness

The following quiz helps you assess your level of emotional awareness. Answer the following questions with: almost never, occasionally, often, very often, or almost always. There are no right or wrong responses, only the opportunity to become better acquainted with your emotional responses.

Nonverbal communication and conflict resolution

When people are in the middle of a conflict, the words they use rarely convey the issues at the heart of the problem. But by paying close attention to the other person's nonverbal signals or “body language,” such as facial expressions, posture, gestures, and tone of voice, you can better understand what the person is really saying. This will allow you to respond in a way that builds trust, and gets to the root of the problem.

[Read: Nonverbal Communication and Body Language]

Your ability to accurately read another person depends on your own emotional awareness. The more aware you are of your own emotions, the easier it will be for you to pick up on the wordless clues that reveal what others are feeling. Think about what you are transmitting to others during conflict, and if what you say matches your body language. If you say “I'm fine,” but you clench your teeth and look away, then your body is clearly signaling you are anything but “fine.” A calm tone of voice, a reassuring touch, or an interested facial expression can go a long way toward relaxing a tense exchange.

More tips for managing and resolving conflict

You can ensure that the process of managing and resolving conflict is as positive as possible by sticking to the following guidelines:

Listen for what is felt as well as said. When you really listen, you connect more deeply to your own needs and emotions, and to those of other people. Listening also strengthens, informs, and makes it easier for others to hear you when it's your turn to speak.

Make conflict resolution the priority rather than winning or “being right.” Maintaining and strengthening the relationship, rather than “winning” the argument, should always be your first priority. Be respectful of the other person and their viewpoint.

Focus on the present. If you're holding on to grudges based on past conflicts, your ability to see the reality of the current situation will be impaired. Rather than looking to the past and assigning blame, focus on what you can do in the here-and-now to solve the problem.

Pick your battles. Conflicts can be draining, so it's important to consider whether the issue is really worth your time and energy. Maybe you don't want to surrender a parking space if you've been circling for 15 minutes, but if there are dozens of empty spots, arguing over a single space isn't worth it.

Be willing to forgive. Resolving conflict is impossible if you're unwilling or unable to forgive others. Resolution lies in releasing the urge to punish, which can serve only to deplete and drain your life.

Know when to let something go. If you can't come to an agreement, agree to disagree. It takes two people to keep an argument going. If a conflict is going nowhere, you can choose to disengage and move on.

Using humor in conflict resolution

You can avoid many confrontations and resolve arguments and disagreements by communicating in a humorous way. Humor can help you say things that might otherwise be difficult to express without offending someone. However, it's important that you laugh with the other person, not at them. When humor and play are used to reduce tension and anger, reframe problems, and put the situation into perspective, the conflict can actually become an opportunity for greater connection and intimacy.

Authors: Jeanne Segal, Ph. D., Lawrence Robinson, and Melinda Smith, M.A.

      • References

        10.3 Causes and Outcomes of Conflict – Organizational Behavior. (n.d.). Retrieved May 25, 2022, from https://open.lib.umn.edu/organizationalbehavior/chapter/10-3-causes-and-outcomes-of-conflict/

        Başoğul, C., & Özgür, G. (2016). Role of Emotional Intelligence in Conflict Management Strategies of Nurses. Asian Nursing Research, 10(3), 228–233. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.anr.2016.07.002

        Corcoran, Kathleen O’Connell, and Brent Mallinckrodt. “Adult Attachment, Self-Efficacy, Perspective Taking, and Conflict Resolution.” Journal of Counseling & Development 78, no. 4 (2000): 473–83. https://doi.org/10.1002/j.1556-6676.2000. tb01931.x

        Yarnell, Lisa M., and Kristin D. Neff. “Self-Compassion, Interpersonal Conflict Resolutions, and Well-Being.” Self and Identity 12, no. 2 (March 1, 2013): 146–59. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298868.2011.649545

        Tucker, Corinna Jenkins, Susan M. Mchale, and Ann C. Crouter. “Conflict Resolution: Links with Adolescents’ Family Relationships and Individual Well-Being.” Journal of Family Issues 24, no. 6 (September 1, 2003): 715–36. https://doi.org/10.1177/0192513X03251181

      CR Kit – Covers causes of conflict, different conflict styles, and fair fighting guidelines to help you positively resolve disagreements. (Conflict Resolution Network)

      12 Skills Summary – A 12-step conflict resolution training kit. (Conflict Resolution Network)

      Effective Communication – The art of listening in conflict resolution. (University of Maryland)

      Last updated: November 1, 2022

      Pairing a Third-Party Bluetooth Accessory with an iPhone or iPad

      This article explains how to pair an iPhone or iPad with Bluetooth accessories for listening to music and watching online videos, making phone calls, and more.

      Enable Bluetooth on your device

      Depending on the applications you are using, you may be prompted to enable Bluetooth before pairing with an accessory via Bluetooth.

      1. Go to Settings > Privacy & Security and tap Bluetooth.
      2. Then turn on Bluetooth for the applications you want to use.

      Pair your device with a Bluetooth accessory

      1. On your device, go to Settings > Bluetooth and turn on Bluetooth. Stay on this screen until you've completed all the steps to pair your accessory.
      2. Put the accessory into discoverable mode and wait until it appears on the device screen. If your accessory doesn't show up or you don't know how to put it into discoverable mode, see the instructions that came with the accessory or contact the manufacturer.
      3. To pair, tap the accessory name when it appears on the screen. You may need to enter a PIN or passcode. If you do not know this information, refer to the documentation supplied with the accessory.

      Once paired, the accessory can be used with the device. To pair with multiple Bluetooth accessories, repeat these steps. If multiple Bluetooth devices are paired with an iPhone or iPad, you can choose which one to use as the audio source.

      Unpairing a Bluetooth accessory

      To unpair a Bluetooth accessory, go to Settings > Bluetooth. Select the desired accessory, tap the Details button, and then tap Forget This Device. The accessory will be removed from the list of available Bluetooth devices.

      To add a Bluetooth accessory to your device again, put it in discoverable mode and repeat the pairing steps.

      If you cannot pair a Bluetooth accessory

      Learn what to do if you still can't pair your Bluetooth accessory with your device.

      Information about non-Apple products or independent websites not controlled or tested by Apple is not endorsed or endorsed by Apple. Apple is not responsible for the selection, functionality, or use of third party websites or products. Apple is also not responsible for the accuracy or reliability of information posted on third party websites. Contact the supplier for more information.

      Published date:

      Set up and pair your Apple Watch with iPhone

      To use your Apple Watch with watchOS 9, you must pair it with an iPhone 8 or later running iOS 16 or later. The setup assistants on iPhone and Apple Watch work together to help you pair and set up your watch.

      If you have difficulty seeing your Apple Watch or iPhone screen, you can use VoiceOver or Zoom even during setup. See Set up your Apple Watch with VoiceOver or Use zoom on your Apple Watch.

      Turn on, pair and set up your Apple Watch

      1. Wear your Apple Watch on your wrist. Adjust your Apple Watch band, or choose the right size band so it fits snugly around your wrist, but doesn't pinch it.

        For information on how to change bands on your Apple Watch, see Removing, changing, and fastening Apple Watch bands.

      2. To turn on your Apple Watch, press and hold the side button until the Apple logo appears.

      3. Bring iPhone to Apple Watch, wait for the Apple Watch pairing screen on iPhone, then tap Continue.

        You can also open the Apple Watch app on iPhone and tap Pair with Other Watch.

      4. Tap Customize for Yourself.

      5. When prompted, position your iPhone so that the Apple Watch appears in the viewfinder in the Apple Watch app. This is how a pair is created between two devices.

      6. Tap Set Up Apple Watch, then follow the on-screen instructions on your iPhone and Apple Watch to complete the setup.

      To learn more about your Apple Watch while it syncs, tap Get to Know Your Watch. You can learn about new features, see Apple Watch tips, and read this user guide right on your iPhone. To find this information after setting up your Apple Watch, open the Apple Watch app on your iPhone, then tap Browse.

      Cellular activation

      During setup, you can activate the cellular network on your Apple Watch. If you don't want to do it right away, you can activate it later in the Apple Watch app on iPhone. See Use your Apple Watch with a cellular network.

      iPhone and Apple Watch must use the same carrier network. However, if you're setting up an Apple Watch for a user in your Family Sharing group, the watch doesn't have to be connected to the same mobile carrier as the iPhone you manage it with.

      The cellular service is not available in all areas.

      Problem pairing?

      • If you see a dial while trying to pair. This means that an Apple Watch has already been paired with an iPhone. First you need to erase all content from your Apple Watch and reset them.

      • If the camera does not turn on during pairing. Tap the "Pair Apple Watch Manually" button at the bottom of the iPhone screen and follow the on-screen instructions.

      • If the Apple Watch and iPhone cannot be paired. See Apple Support article Apple Watch won't connect or pair with iPhone.

      Apple Watch unpaired

      1. Open the Apple Watch app on iPhone.

      2. Tap My Watch, then tap All Watches at the top of the screen.

      3. Tap the button next to the Apple Watch you want to unpair, then tap Unpair Apple Watch.

      Pairing multiple Apple Watches

      You can pair multiple Apple Watches at the same time, just as you paired the first watch. Bring your iPhone close to your Apple Watch, wait for the Apple Watch pairing screen on iPhone to appear, then tap Pair. Or follow the steps below.

      1. Open the Apple Watch app on iPhone.

      2. Tap My Watch, then tap All Watches at the top of the screen.

      3. Tap Add Clock, then follow the onscreen instructions.

      See Use multiple Apple Watches with one iPhone.

      To set up a watch for a person in your Family Sharing group, see Set up an Apple Watch for a family member.

      Quickly switch to other Apple Watches

      Your iPhone detects which Apple Watches you are wearing and automatically connects to them. All you have to do is put on other Apple Watches and raise your wrist.

      You can also select Apple Watch manually:

      1. Open the Apple Watch app on iPhone.

      2. Tap My Watch, then tap All Watches at the top of the screen.

      3. Turn off the "Auto Switch" function.

      Check your Apple Watch is connected to your iPhone: Touch and hold the bottom edge of the watch screen, swipe up to open Control Center, then look for the connect icon.

      Pairing an Apple Watch with a new iPhone

      If your Apple Watch is already paired with your other iPhone and you want to pair with your new iPhone, follow the steps below.

      1. Create an iCloud backup for the iPhone currently paired with the Apple Watch (see the iPhone User Guide for details).

      2. Set up your new iPhone. On the Apps & Data screen, choose to restore from an iCloud backup, then select the latest iCloud backup.

      3. Continue setting up your iPhone, and when prompted, choose to pair your Apple Watch with your new iPhone.

      When iPhone setup is complete, your Apple Watch will ask you to pair with your new iPhone. Tap OK on your Apple Watch and enter your passcode.

      For details, see the Apple Support article How to pair your Apple Watch with a new iPhone.

      Transfer an existing plan to the new Apple Watch

      You can migrate your existing carrier plan from your Apple Watch with Cellular to another Apple Watch with Cellular. To do this, follow the steps below.

      1. With your Apple Watch on, open the Apple Watch app on your iPhone.


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