How to get someone attention
7 Weird, But Genius Ways To Get Someone To Pay Attention To You
Life
Syda Productions/Fotolia
by Lauren Schumacker
Catching someone's attention can be more difficult than you'd think, particularly in this day and age when so many people are constantly looking at a smartphone screen, listening to music, or attempting to multitask. It's not always as simple as giving them a look or a smile, or even just being kind to them. And whether it's a potential romantic partner, a colleague or boss you're trying to impress, or a stranger on the street, knowing some of the weird, but genius ways to get someone to pay attention to you might increase your odds of ultimate success.
There are a lot of reasons as to why you might need (or want) to get someone to pay attention to you. If you need help, are trying to impress someone, or are attempting to flirt, catching someone's eye is important. And, sure, you can simply strike up a conversation with someone (just say hello) or do something that makes a bit of a scene to make sure that people are paying attention, but there are a number of other, arguably more subtle things that might seem slightly strange or out-of-the-box, but that will work just as well, if not better. If you're willing to try something different, getting someone's attention just might not be as difficult as it sometimes may seem.
1
Stand In Silence
Inti St. Clair/FotoliaYou might think that simply standing in silence would have the opposite effect of getting someone to notice you — that instead it would cause you to sort of blend into the background — but that might not be the case.
"This works because as you stand quietly with a pleasant expression your face you are making eye contact with participants, engaging them," Bianca L. Rodriguez, MA, EdM, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist, tells Romper by email. But it really only works if you're in a position of power or that people know that you command respect. If no one knows that you're in charge, they might not have the same response. They'll just think you're hanging out outside of the center of attention.
2
Consider Your Scent
Mirko Macari/FotoliaScent matters when you're trying to capture someone's attention. Think about how you respond when someone who's scent you like walks by. You take notice.
"The cologne or perfume you wear will draw attention to you," Fran Greene, LCSW, author of The Secret Rules of Flirting, tells Romper by email. "Remember less is more."
3
Use Their Name
william87/Fotolia"Using a person's name when you address them is an excellent way to get their attention because it's hard to ignore someone saying your name," Rodriguez says. "It also displays familiarity and directness. This is especially impactful with acquaintances and public figures that you don't have a close connection with. Having someone say your name feels personal and usually lowers defenses giving you an automatic in."
Think about when you were in class as a kid or in a college lecture hall and a teacher called you out by name. There's little doubt that you sat up and paid attention.
4
Treat Your Outfit As A Way To Start Conversation
Inti St. Clair/FotoliaOne way to connect with someone and make them pay attention to you is to find common ground. Believe it or not, your clothes can help you do that.
"Have you ever started a conversation with someone wearing a T-shirt or baseball cap with the name of a place you visited or a school [that] you or a family member attended? Wearing clothing that reflects you gives the other person the green light to talk to you," Greene says. Even if you're not actively trying to talk to them, they'll still notice you.
Greene also recommends interesting pieces of jewelry, which can act as conversation-starters. "Unique, unusual, or even classic jewelry will encourage others to comment," she adds.
5
Disagree With Them
DW labs Incorporated/FotoliaIt may sound counter-productive to try to get someone's attention by disagreeing with them, but it really might work. In a piece that she wrote for Inc., Betty Liu, host and editor-at-large for Bloomberg Markets, said that the best way to capture attention is through something that her friend, Fred Teng, called "soft conflict." Disagreeing with someone about something means that you can both take a side and argue it out, which definitely means that they're paying attention. Don't get into a serious fight, but a little bit of back and forth might actually do some good for your connection.
6
Ask Surprising Questions
YakobchukOlena/FotoliaAsking surprising questions means catching people a little bit off-guard, but that's not a bad thing. It's easy to sort of let your attention drift when you're asked the same super-basic questions that you're asked all the time. But when someone asks an interesting question, you get interested as well.
"This creates disruption, which activates our attention as we are wired to notice things that violate our expectations," Rodriguez says. "Most people enjoy talking about themselves [and an] unanticipated question invites them to share in a fun and interesting new way."
7
Tell Them You Appreciate Them Or Give Them A Compliment
zinkevych/FotoliaEven if it's hard for them to take a compliment or accept praise, people like to hear that they're appreciated or that you like something about them. "All people want to feel validated and acknowledged," Rodriguez says. "Expressing this makes a person feel special, which will absolutely capture their attention and their heart. Just make sure it's authentic or it could feel manipulative and backfire."
Getting someone to pay attention to you doesn't need to be difficult or confusing. Using some small, slightly-strange techniques might help you get people to notice you effectively without doing anything too over-the-top.
How to Be More Attractive and Get Someone's Attention
If you want to command, respect, admiration, and higher pay, then stop chasing people and learn to attract them.
Culturally speaking the person with the higher status is the person that does not beg to get someone’s attention, but it’s the person who elegantly attracts others to him/her.
This person is often labeled Magnetic. That could be you.
I learned over the years a few things that will make you more attractive and more magnetic. Below are 9 of them.
1 – Be interested in your topic. The best thing you can do for yourself is to find a way and rekindle your passion for your subject. Passion is contagious, and if you show passion for what you are talking about, then people will be drawn into your topic at an unconscious level.
I keep digging, researching, reading, exploring, and trying things out in the field of public speaking so that I will never be bored. Figure out what you need to do today to re-kindle your passion in your topic.
If you can’t cultivate the passion for what you are doing, then you might as well seek some other line of work. Because others who have a passion for the topic will beat you in performance and communication.
2 – Be interested in your audience. You can’t expect your audience to be interested in you if you are not interested in them. Get curious about your audience. Study them, survey them and learn about their lives. People can detect genuine interest.
The other day a client of mine told me that he was trying to influence another VP in his company, but he knew nothing about that VP. He was not aware where the VP lived, what that VP was working on, or his vision of things.
Without being interested in your audience, and learning about them, you will not be able to communicate effectively to them. Most of your communication with your audience is going to be presumptive, and that could get you into a lot of trouble.
If you know what they care about and you mention it in your presentations, you will be the coolest and most attractive person in their life.
3 – Become a good storyteller. I studied influence and persuasion for the past ten years – Neuro-linguistic-programming, influence psychology, hypnosis, etc – and storytelling is the most powerful tool I found to grab attention and change minds.
I was an engineer in my earlier career and thought (as most technical people) that I am not a storytelling kind of person. I was wrong. With some classes and practice, I got better. Now I can’t imagine I would be where I am today without being able to tell stories.
Stories captivate people and affect them at a very deep level. Research indicates that a good story can influence your neurochemistry and ultimately affect your behavior. That’s why storytelling has been one of the best influence and persuasion tools of leaders around the world.
4 – Have a unique point of view. The population of earth is expanding exponentially, and you need to stand out to be noticed. The best way to stand out is by developing your perspective. Don’t just listen to the news and get your opinion from there. Read, think, discuss, debate, formulate your opinions and back them up. This applies to life and work.
What do you think about Global warming or the future of Social Media? Do you have an opinion?
Notice that authority figures always have opinions. That’s why they get invited to speak, that’s why the are interviewed in the media, that’s why they are paid the big bucks.
What is your opinion about this? Share it in the comments: I would love to know.
5 – Become “Brain Candy.” Read outside your field, travel, take martial arts, take art classes and blend what you learn into your profession. The new perspective you bring to your field from all those activities makes you brain candy to those around you.
6 – Develop your voice. Writers write to develop their writing voice and speakers speak to develop their speaking voice. You have to talk and communicate out loud on a regular basis. Developing your voice takes time, and you have to commit to it because it will never develop on its own. Your unique speaking voice is yours, and nobody will have anything like it – that’s why it’s so valuable.
Having your unique voice will make you attractive because you will stand out as a fresh breath of air in your field. While everyone else sounds the same, repeats and regurgitates from the same material and opinions, YOU will be different.
7 – Simplify the complicated. Have you ever heard yourself say “this is too complicated to explain?” What happened next? Did you give up? Most people give up and move on.
Next time you get to a complicated topic, go lock yourself up in a room and figure out a way to explain it. That’s how you grow, and that’s how you stand out as a communicator.
Once people hear your explanation, they will be thrilled because somebody else did the work for them. The marketing genius Jay Abraham once said: “if you can explain people’s problems better than they do, they will automatically assume that you have a solution.” If you can solve complex problems well at work and for your clients, then they will be sold before you even present the solution.
8 – Be more expressive. Use your hands, face, eyes, voice, body, and space around to express your ideas. People usually hold back because they don’t know the limits. The best way to learn about your limits is to take a public speaking class with video feedback and get professional feedback on your concerns (don’t video tape yourself alone, because you typically will be very judgmental of yourself at first).
9 – Develop your positive emotional muscle. Emotions are infectious, and people want to be around positively charged people because they want to be infected. When was the last time you felt like a winner, felt satisfied, accomplished, happy, content, powerful, loved, etc.?. These are the emotions I try to cultivate and build every day.
Society, the economy, and our educational system keep us focused on stress, anxiety, scarcity, fear and we forget about these positive emotions. Just like a muscle, if you don’t use it you lose it, and positive emotions start to fade away.
It does not have to be this way. Every day focus on recreating these emotions at will. The more you do it, the better and stronger the muscle gets.
So stop pushing, shoving, or chasing your audience and start attracting them to you and your ideas. You will find it very rewarding for you, your career and your finances.
Becoming more magnetic is the best way to get people’s attention and influence them.
10 Ways to Grab People's Attention - Ideonomics - Smart about the Essentials
Photo: Keoni Cabral/FlickrBen Parr is co-founder of DominateFund, former Mashable editor, and author of Captivology.
You probably face attention problems every day. How to attract the attention of new customers? How to keep the attention of existing ones? How to captivate your boss or date partner with an idea? This is a difficult task because very few understand how attention actually works.
While writing my new book Captivology: The Science of Capturing People's Attention, I studied over a thousand studies and spoke with dozens of scientists and business leaders to understand why we pay attention to certain people and ideas and not to others . Based on this research, I have chosen ten ways to grab people's attention. They won't turn you into a superstar, but they will help get more attention for your ideas.
1. Offer hot coffee . Research shows that physical sensations of warmth are associated with sensations of interpersonal warmth. In other words, if you give someone a cup of hot coffee or tea, they are more likely to have warm feelings for you.
2. Circle your profile picture in red . Want to go on a date? One study shows that a wide red border around a person's face makes them more attractive to strangers.
3. Use contrasting colors for the Buy button . Amazon is full of orange and yellow “Buy” buttons, and for good reason: they contrast sharply with the white and gray background color on the site, which means more clicks.
4. Make your offer scarce . Our coordinate grid shifts when it seems to us that something is not enough in access. Gmail and Medium have gained a lot of attention by limiting the number of early adopters with an invite system. Slow rolling out of a product and limited access is often a powerful way to grab people's attention.
5. Give gifts at the most unexpected times . Our brains are wired to pay attention to surprises that go against our expectations. The next time you give someone something, do something differently: wrap it in unusual paper, give a gift at an unexpected moment, add some more detail from yourself. Show that you are doing something unique and creative.
6. Show visually all the prizes and rewards that you offer people . Research shows that we get additional motivation when we see the desired reward or the expected fruits of our labors. Don't just talk about the award - show it!
7. Rely on the experts . Our focus is incredibly respectful of experts, so find a trusted expert in your industry to recommend and speak out for you.
8. Lean on the crowd . We trust the wisdom of the crowd—without that trust, sites like Yelp wouldn't have users. The crowd also gravitates towards places where they can get involved and have a direct impact (like Indiegogo and Kickstarter).
9. Cut yourself off in mid-sentence . We are obsessed with perfection—it's an innate, insatiable need—because we don't feel comfortable with uncertainty. Don't be afraid to end your stories with an unexpected turn that plunges you into a state of expectation - then your audience will return to watch the sequel. Remember how Steve Jobs ended his presentations with the words: "And one more thing ..."
10. Confirm that your audience is special . We have an innate desire for approval from others, for a sense of belonging. The greatest projects, startups, and brands build enduring communities around them. Be sure to let your audience know that you appreciate, respect, and cherish them.
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How to attract attention? | Articles on practical psychology
Very often in our life we lack someone's attention, it can be the attention of parents, friends, a loved one. We want others to think more about us and take into account our opinion, but, nevertheless, we ourselves reject any advice.
We want to be given it, but we don't want to listen to it. and usually, when we have the opportunity to make a decision on our own, we panic and cannot do anything, and as soon as they try to help us, we immediately reject all offers and do the opposite. But after that, we want people to continue to help us and take into account our opinion.
In order to attract someone's attention, first, one must not reject someone else's. You should always listen to the opinions of other people, especially those close to you, then they will understand that their opinion is important to you and will begin to reckon with yours.
If you want people to pay attention to you and talk about you, discussing only your advantages, then you should not push people away, you should be closer to them, join the team, society, company, etc. But in general, in order for parents, friends or a loved one to pay attention to you, you need to use different lists of rules. After all, they are all from different circles and do not give you proper attention for various reasons.
Parents
So, parents. Let's start with them. With probably the most important problem for you. After all, the neglect of parents from childhood has a strong imprint on the future. What to do so that they take care of you and spend more time with you?
1. Tell them that you miss them. Have a heart-to-heart talk and explain how important their attention is to you at your age.
2. Remember something from your childhood and laugh together. Remember also the case when you were lost somewhere, and your mother tried to find you for a long time and was very worried. This will remind your parents how much you are dear to them.
3. Share one of your important secrets with your parents. Perhaps, in response to this, they will tell you something no less important, and you will understand that by accusing them of inattention, you are making a big mistake.
4. Take the initiative in your own hands. Invite your parents to go with you to the cinema, cafes, do not wait for an invitation from them. Perhaps they are so tired at work that they forget about everything in the world.
5. Help your parents. Suddenly, the whole reason is that they do not have time to do anything. Then, thanks to your help, they will have an evening free. Just to go somewhere with you!
6. And most importantly, remember: that the fault does not necessarily lie in them! Could it be you? And should you change? And only by changing, you can achieve what you want!
Friends
Our next problem is friends! What to do with them? How to make yourself interested?
1. Don't be pessimistic! Look at life from the good side! People value vitality.
2. Do something interesting. It could be writing a book, making clay toys, or baking homemade cakes. People will be curious about your new hobby and will be drawn to you!
3. Be more fun! Find out some latest jokes and funny anecdotes. Joke - and thus entertain the company! Just remember: jokes must be harmless!
4. Try to be in time everywhere and always! Sparkle your new outfit at parties and nightclubs! Be the center of attention at any celebration! Try not to miss a single picnic or outing with friends. Realizing that you can always come and amuse everyone with your new joke, you will be invited again and again!
5. Be the author of grandiose ideas! Celebrating your birthday in an unusual place or going to the movies to see a great movie. Organize your meetings as often as possible!
6. Do not forget that you also need to share your secrets with friends, and also make it clear that no one except you will know their secrets.
Having completed all these points, you will be convinced that now not a single trip to the beach or a trip to the mountains will do without your participation!
Favorites
And, finally, another, no less important problem - a loved one! How not to lose, or, conversely, win his attention if his gaze is directed far away from you?
1.