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How can you take care of yourself


NIMH » Caring for Your Mental Health

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Overview

Mental health includes emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, act, make choices, and relate to others. Mental health is more than the absence of a mental illness—it’s essential to your overall health and quality of life. Self-care can play a role in maintaining your mental health and help support your treatment and recovery if you have a mental illness.

About Self-Care

Self-care means taking the time to do things that help you live well and improve both your physical health and mental health. When it comes to your mental health, self-care can help you manage stress, lower your risk of illness, and increase your energy. Even small acts of self-care in your daily life can have a big impact.

Here are some tips to help you get started with self-care:

  • Get regular exercise.  Just 30 minutes of walking every day can help boost your mood and improve your health. Small amounts of exercise add up, so don’t be discouraged if you can’t do 30 minutes at one time.
  • Eat healthy, regular meals and stay hydrated. A balanced diet and plenty of water can improve your energy and focus throughout the day. Also, limit caffeinated beverages such as soft drinks or coffee.
  • Make sleep a priority. Stick to a schedule, and make sure you’re getting enough sleep. Blue light from devices and screens can make it harder to fall asleep, so reduce blue light exposure from your phone or computer before bedtime.
  • Try a relaxing activity. Explore relaxation or wellness programs or apps, which may incorporate meditation, muscle relaxation, or breathing exercises. Schedule regular times for these and other healthy activities you enjoy such as journaling.
  • Set goals and priorities. Decide what must get done now and what can wait. Learn to say “no” to new tasks if you start to feel like you’re taking on too much. Try to be mindful of what you have accomplished at the end of the day, not what you have been unable to do.
  • Practice gratitude. Remind yourself daily of things you are grateful for. Be specific. Write them down at night, or replay them in your mind.
  • Focus on positivity. Identify and challenge your negative and unhelpful thoughts.
  • Stay connected. Reach out to your friends or family members who can provide emotional support and practical help.

Self-care looks different for everyone, and it is important to find what you need and enjoy. It may take trial and error to discover what works best for you. In addition, although self-care is not a cure for mental illnesses, understanding what causes or triggers your mild symptoms and what coping techniques work for you can help manage your mental health.

For other ideas for healthy practices for your mind, body, surroundings, and relationships, see the National Institutes of Health (NIH) Wellness Toolkits.

When to Seek Professional Help

Seek professional help if you are experiencing severe or distressing symptoms that have lasted two weeks or more, such as:

  • Difficulty sleeping
  • Appetite changes that result in unwanted weight changes
  • Struggling to get out of bed in the morning because of mood
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Loss of interest in things you usually find enjoyable
  • Inability to perform usual daily functions and responsibilities

Don’t wait until your symptoms are overwhelming. Talk about your concerns with your primary care provider, who can refer you to a mental health specialist if needed. If you don’t know where to start, read the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) Tips for Talking With a Health Care Provider About Your Mental Health. Learn more about how to get help or find a provider on the NIMH’s Help for Mental Illnesses webpage.

What to Do in a Crisis

If you are thinking about harming yourself or attempting suicide, tell someone who can help right away or dial 911 in an emergency. You can also call or text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 or chat at 988lifeline.org, or contact the Crisis Text Line (text HELLO to 741741). Both services provide 24-hour, confidential support to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress. Contact social media outlets directly if you are concerned about a friend’s social media updates.

For additional information about suicide prevention, please see NIMH’s Suicide Prevention webpage.

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Federal Resources

  • NIH Emotional Wellness Toolkit: This NIH toolkit provides six strategies for improving your emotional health.
  • NIH Social Wellness Toolkit: This NIH toolkit provides six strategies for improving your social health.
  • MedlinePlus: How to Improve Mental Health: MedlinePlus provides health information and tips for improving your mental health.
  • CDC COVID-19: Care for Yourself: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) provides information on caring for yourself, particularly during the COVID-19 pandemic.
  • CDC COVID-19: Coping With Stress: CDC provides information on how to cope with stress, particularly during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Other Resources

Note: This list of non-federal resources is provided for informational purposes only. It is not comprehensive and does not constitute an endorsement by NIMH, NIH, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, or the U.S. government.

  • DBSA Wellness Toolbox (Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance)
  • Live Your Life Well (Mental Health America)
  • Mental Health: Keeping Your Emotional Health (American Academy of Family Physicians)

Last Reviewed: April 2021

Unless otherwise specified, NIMH information and publications are in the public domain and available for use free of charge. Citation of NIMH is appreciated. Please see our Citing NIMH Information and Publications page for more information.

Taking Good Care of Yourself

Now that you've made the decision to begin your journey to recovery, below are some tools to aid you in the process. Identifying tools and developing plans will help you be more prepared and empowered to take action when it comes to your recovery. Here are healthy steps to take:

Work Toward Goals Care for Yourself Build Strong Connections Meditate

Working Toward Goals

People in recovery offer the following suggestions:

  • Focus on your strengths.
  • Focus on solving problems.
  • Focus on the future instead of reviewing hurts from the past.
  • Focus on your life instead of your illness.

As you work on your recovery, you might want to write down some of your main goals. These goals can be short-term and easily achievable, or you can start identifying bigger, more long-term goals that you want to work your way towards. It's helpful to think of small steps to take toward them over a certain amount of time, like a week or a month. Remember to congratulate yourself for any successes. Achieving goals - even small ones - is a sign of hope and accomplishment.

Developing goals for recovery can be tricky, especially if you aren't sure what it is that you want to accomplish. Consider your interests, things that bring you joy and things that keep you motivated. Also, think about the things you want, like where you want your life to go or what you would do more of if you could. Having a deep investment in the goals that you set will increase the chances of completing them.

Once you have set goals for yourself, you need to figure out what things are necessary to accomplish those goals. Be clear about why you set this goal and how your life will be different once this goal is achieved. You should also consider the strengths and skills that you possess that will help you achieve your goal. Try to involve necessary support systems and resources that can help you through the process if and when you need it. Finally, remember to stay focused on the goal and not on the difficulties you might be having. Keep an open mind, and know that you may hit barriers along the way. Recovery is no easy task, and focusing on the negative experiences will only make things harder.

Create a journal or scrapbook with pictures and clippings to help maintain your goals. Keeping a journal or scrapbook is a good way to track your goals and remind you of the things you've accomplished and the things you still plan to accomplish. Continue to add new goals as they come up. Recovery is a constant process and continuing to set goals for yourself will keep you motivated to reach and maintain wellness.

Care for Yourself

Taking good care of yourself is paramount to the success of your recovery process. People in recovery find that their physical, spiritual, and emotional health are all connected, and that supporting one supports the others. Taking care of all aspects of you will increase the likelihood that you stay well.

To help support you in your recovery, you can access a three-minute screening tool and progress monitor for depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, and PTSD. Click here to take the screener or mark your progress.

Some tips for self-care include:

  • Live Healthy, eat healthy foods, get enough sleep, exercise regularly, and avoid drugs and alcohol. Manage stress and go for regular medical check-ups.
  • Practice good hygiene. Good hygiene is important for social, medical, and psychological reasons in that it not only reduces the risk of illness, but it also improves the way others view you and how you view yourself.
  • See friends  to build your sense of belonging. Consider joining a support group to make new friends.
  • Try to do something you enjoy every day. That might mean dancing, watching a favorite TV show, working in the garden, painting or reading.
  • Find ways to relax, like meditation, yoga, getting a massage, taking a bath or walking in the woods.

The National Institute of Wellness has created an online "wellness" screener that allows you to keep track of your own recovery journey. Visit the NIW's website at http://www.testwell.org/twfree.htm to obtain your wellness score.

You can also visit LiveYourLifeWell.info to learn more about the 10 Tools to Live Your Life Well.

Strengthen Your Connections

The importance of incorporating joy, spirit, and relaxation in your life has many implications in developing resiliency (the ability to recover from an illness) and staying healthy. The four C's to joy, spirit, and relaxation are: connect with yourself, connect with others, connect to your community, and create joy and satisfaction. As you use these four C's remember to continue trying to push your comfort levels and do things you may not have done before.  

Connect With Yourself

It is important that you check in with yourself periodically. If you do not then you may not realize that things are changing or getting out of control. Checking in with yourself allows you the opportunity to evaluate where you are in your recovery. You may find that you need to readjust what step of your action plan you are on or try different coping tools.

If you have had low times in the past you understand how hard it can be to get out of those places. Learning all that you can about your mental health condition will help let you know that your hard times are not your fault. Making a list of accomplishments that you have achieved is a good resource to turn back to when you are feeling low.

Another tool that may help you is to journal about your experiences. Keeping a journal is a great way to learn about yourself. Being completely honest in your journal is important; in your journal, you should feel free to let your guard down. This will help you discover how you really feel and vent your stress in a non-threatening manner.

Another method of connecting with yourself is to become an advocate and share your story. There has been a lot of research that explores the power of storytelling as a form of therapy. Sharing your own experiences through writing or talking is an important stage of recovery. Just as you are supported by reading the thoughts and experiences of others you can also be the person that helps lift another. 

Connect With Others

Spending time with positive, loving people you care about and trust can ease stress, help your mood and improve the way you feel overall. They may be family members, close friends, members of a support group or a peer counselor at the local drop-in center. Many communities even have warmlines (free hotlines run by people with mental health conditions) that you can call to talk to someone and receive peer support.

Research points to the benefits of social connection:

  • Increased happiness. In one compelling study, a key difference between very happy people and less happy people was good relationships.
  • Better health. Loneliness was associated with a higher risk of high blood pressure in a recent study of older people.
  • A longer life. People with strong social and community ties were two or three times less likely to die during a 9-year study.

Connection happens when you get:

  • Concrete help, such as having a friend pick your kids up from school;
  • Emotional support, like hearing someone say, "I'm really sorry you're having such a tough time";
  • Perspective, like being reminded that even the moodiest teenagers grow up;
  • Advice, such as a suggestion to plan a weekly date with your spouse;
  • Validation, like learning that other folks love reading train schedules too.

Do you have enough support? Ask yourself if you have at least a few friends or family members who:

  • You feel comfortable to be with;
  • Give you a sense that you could tell them anything;
  • Can help you solve problems;
  • Make you feel valued;
  • Take your concerns seriously.

Connect to Your Community

A great way to feel emotionally strong and resilient in times of stress is to feel connected to a broad community. Think about the things you like to do. You can expand your social network by looking into a community organization that brings people together who share the same interests. For instance, many communities have local biking, hiking, or walking groups. Is there something you've always wanted to do like learn a new language? Take a class, or join a local group. You also may find the support you need through local support groups for a specific issue like parenting, dealing with a health problem, or caring for a loved one who's ill.

Or consider volunteering with a community organization that helps fill a need. Here are some tips to make sure your volunteer experience works for you, and does not become an additional source of stress:

  • Get the right match. Think about what kind of work you like to do, based on your interests, skills and availability. Consider making this a list for easier readability. Do you like to read, write, build things, repair things, or sort and organize? Do you have a special field of knowledge that you could teach to struggling students as a tutor or coach? Are you especially concerned about homelessness or pollution? Do you love to garden or work in an office? Do you speak another language? Do you need to be at home, and bring your volunteer work home with you? Whatever your situation and your interests, there is probably a volunteer opportunity to make a great contribution in your community. Volunteering will help you build strong connections with others - a proven way to protect your mental health.
  • Make it count. You want your volunteer time to make a difference, so ask questions to make sure the organization uses volunteers efficiently and productively. Ask what volunteers do, where and when they do it, and whether an employee is available with information and guidance when needed.
  • Find a connection. To find a volunteer position that's right for you, contact your volunteer center. Look in the Yellow Pages under "Volunteer Clearinghouse" or "Volunteer Center," or find options online at http://www.volunteermatch.org/. Your local Mental Health America affiliate office also may be looking for volunteers. You can also contact your city or county information line to ask for a referral to a volunteer coordinator service in your area.

Create Joy and Satisfaction

Living with a mental health condition can be taxing emotionally, physically, and mentally. Experts have found that good feelings can boost your ability to deal with stress, solve problems, think flexibly, and even fight disease. Taking care of your body emotionally, physically, and mentally through creating joy and satisfaction is an important part of living with or without a mental health condition.

Studies show that:

  • Laughing decreases pain, may help your heart and lungs, promotes muscle relaxation, and can reduce anxiety.
  • Positive emotions can decrease stress hormones and build emotional strength.
  • Leisure activities offer a distraction from problems, a sense of competence and many other benefits. For example, in one study observing twins, the one who participated in leisure activities was less likely to develop Alzheimer's disease or dementia than their fellow twin.

Some tips to enjoy life and relax:

  • Do something you loved to do as a kid. Run through the sprinklers, hang from the monkey bars, or make a mess with finger paints.
  • Do something you've always wanted to do. Bake a soufflé, build a tree house, or learn to knit. If you're not sure how, take a class or look for a local group dedicated to the activity.
  • Watch or listen to comedy. Via video, podcast, or website. Or get a laugh the old-fashioned way - through the comics section.
  • Therapeutic massage. A massage can relieve muscle tension, stimulate the body's natural painkillers and boost your immune system. It can also help you feel less anxious and more relaxed.
  • A nature break. A blue sky, lush bushes, a scenic lake. Walking in - or even just looking at - nature calms our nerves and relieves mental fatigue. In one study, workers with views of nature were happier with their jobs than workers with similar jobs but no nature view.

Meditate

Research shows that meditation offers not only calm, but also helps with anxiety and depression, cancer, chronic pain, asthma, heart disease and high blood pressure.

To get started, all you need is a few minutes each day. Later you may want to work up to 10, 20, or 30 minutes. You can find one of many meditation options in a book or CD, online, or in a class. Or you can try some suggestions below. If one doesn't work, stay calm...and try another.

Types of Meditation:

  • Deep breathing. Sit or lie down comfortably. Rest your hands on your stomach. Slowly count to four while inhaling through your nose. Feel your stomach rise. Hold your breath for a second. Slowly count to four while you exhale, preferably through pursed lips to control the breath. Your stomach will fall slowly. Repeat a few times.
  • Mindfulness Meditation. Focus on your breath. Notice anything that passes through your awareness without judgment. If your mind starts to tackle your to-do list, just return to focusing on your breath.
  • Visualization. Close your eyes, relax and imagine a peaceful place, like a forest. Engage all your senses: Hear the crunching leaves, smell the damp soil, feel the breeze.
  • Repeating a mantra. Sit quietly and pick any meaningful or soothing word, phrase, or sound. You can repeat the mantra aloud or silently. Experts say the repetition creates a physical relaxation response.
  • Participate in a meditative form of exercise. Try tai chi or qi gong, which use soothing, flowing motions.

What is self-care?

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Don't confuse self-care with selfishness. The point is not that we think only about our needs, but that, only by taking care of ourselves, we will be able to give attention and energy to loved ones.

What is self-care?

Self-care can be considered any activity through which we consciously invest energy, time, money in our mental, emotional and physical health. In theory, everything is simple, but in practice we often miss a lot. Proper self-care is essential to maintaining a good mood and reducing anxiety. It is also important so that we can properly build relationships with ourselves and others.

What is not self-care?

Perhaps it is even more important to understand what is not self-care. If we have to force ourselves to do something and we do not get joy from it, this activity can no longer be considered self-care. According to clinical psychologist Agnes Wainman, “Self-care is what recharges us, it shouldn’t take energy away.”

Taking care of yourself is the key to balance in life

Where to start? Here are three golden rules:

• Start simple - sleep, relaxation, pleasant hobbies, going to the doctor. Over time, you will find a rhythm that suits you and understand in what form self-care is most suitable for you personally.

• Self-care is only something we plan on purpose, not something that happens on its own. It is always our conscious choice. If you are planning something, add it to your schedule, tell others about it to solidify your intention. Actively look for opportunities to invest energy in yourself.

• I often stress the importance of mindfulness when talking to clients. In other words, if you do not see something as taking care of yourself, then you will not get the corresponding effect. Be aware of what you are doing, why you are doing it, how you feel about it and what result you get in the end.

Only by taking care of ourselves will we be able to give attention and energy to loved ones

What you can do for yourself:

• Write down everything you don't like or don't want to do. For example: do not check email late at night and at night, do not go to events and parties that you do not like, do not answer calls during lunch and dinner.

• Eat a healthy and balanced diet.

• Get enough sleep. An adult needs 7-8 hours of sleep per day.

• Exercise or exercise. Many do not know this, but physical activity benefits our emotional health, not just physical. It increases serotonin levels, which in turn improves mood and energy. Keeping in mind the rules of self-care, choose the type of physical activity that you enjoy.

• Do not put off the necessary preventive examinations and visits to the doctor.

• Do relaxation exercises and/or meditate. You can do this at any time of the day.

• Spend enough time with loved ones.

• Do something every day to relax, whether it's a short walk or 30 minutes of quiet time.

• Do something nice for yourself every day: go to the movies, cook your favorite meal, arrange a meeting with friends.

• Look for opportunities to laugh.

Make a 15-day self-care schedule and compare how you feel before and after. And remember, as with everything else in life, taking good care of yourself comes with experience.

About the author: Rafailla Michel, counseling psychologist.

Text: Nikolai Protsenko

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Self-care can often be confused with selfishness and narcissism, when in fact it is about everyday habits that take care of the mind, body and spirit. But even in such a good deed there are pitfalls. I decided to figure out how best to take care of my health and what mistakes to avoid.

Helpful: Accepting Help

Sometimes taking care of yourself means admitting that you can't do everything alone. It is impossible to be perfect in everything! A good example of self-care if you are a new mother is to ask your mother-in-law to babysit. It's entirely possible that she's doing something you don't like, like feeding the wrong food or allowing too much, but you really need some time for yourself sometimes.

Once you accept someone else's help, don't forget to show your gratitude for it. A small bonus for accepting help: your relationship with the person will improve, because he will feel a deep connection with you because he was able to do something really nice.

Not helpful: trying to impress people by overexerting yourself

When you're trying to please everyone, you're definitely not taking care of yourself. Women often try to do this unconsciously, sacrificing their own health and happiness. Do you remember the Angelina Jolie interview?

Sometimes married women put themselves in last place until their health makes itself felt.

Not only do you suffer for the convenience of others, but also allow others to be lazy and take you for granted.

Useful: good rest and entertainment

It is enough to sleep seven to eight hours, do daily exercises or meditate, and walk for at least 30 minutes. Psychologists recommend coming up with some rituals for relaxation, so as not to bring the situation to extremes.

I used to think: the New Year holidays will come soon, and that's where I'll sleep! Basically the wrong approach. You need to take breaks in the middle of the week to shake up your mind and body.

Not useful: watch a series until late

Imagine that you are coming home after a long and hard day at work. If you haven't had a break to get some air or take a walk at lunch, then you are completely exhausted, and life seems like hell. All you want to do is stare at the season of American Horror Story and get off the couch only when it's already unbearably sleepy.

Do you think this is how you relax? And here it is not. Most likely, you will oversleep, or wake up on time, but still not spend the morning productively, sticking to short videos on YouTube. It is better to read a book in the bathroom in the evening, and then go to bed on time to get enough rest.

Helpful: dress to feel cool

Dress to feel good. Wear what you really love to work. A good image and hairstyle are signs of successful people, as is commonly believed in society. Spend a little more time looking bright to show how much you value yourself and how much the world should value you. A significant component of self-care: show that you think you deserve better.

Not useful: spending all your money on clothes and makeup

There's a difference between finding the perfect dress that makes you feel like a goddess and spending money on things you don't need, adding to your credit card debt. There is nothing wrong with buying really expensive products, but if this purchase is not planned and does not fit your budget, you definitely should not make it.

Another promotion from NYX? Close the newsletter, you have enough matte lipsticks. Remember that debt is the most common cause of stress, and some psychologists even compare shopaholism with an addiction like alcohol or sex addiction.

Useful: Treat yourself and friends to snacks

Are you sure what kind of food you give your body? Are you eating enough fruits and vegetables? Then you can treat yourself to something spicy, especially if it's part of some social event. What I mean: if you go to the movies, enjoy the popcorn!

Not helpful: pointless snacking

Random snacks won't ruin your health, but an obsession with sugar can. Uncontrolled eating of chocolates leads to obesity, poor immunity and addiction. Eating a box of eclairs and getting digestive problems is not the best choice. Healthy foods can also be delicious if you are not lazy to cook them.

Useful: plan your training time

The more you move, the better. Going outside, breathing as you move, and sweating is an important part of a healthy lifestyle. Choose running, cycling, or swimming to release "feel good" neurochemicals. It also helps to distract, change the scenery and clear your head. Better than if you spent the evening watching TV?

Not useful: plow until the figure is perfect

Millennials are too romantic about the “good lifestyle”: marathon running, the raw food movement, various vitamin juices. Someone goes further - to the biohacking of the body, like Sergei Fage. But exercise is good in moderation. Jump from one diet to another? Going to the gym three hours a day to get your butt like a nut? Generally go to the gym with the clear goal of just burning calories for the cake? Do not do that.

Helpful: making time to support a friend

Humans are deeply social creatures. Anyone can yearn for evenings alone at times - this is normal, but this cannot last forever. It is important to create positive and reciprocal relationships in order to feel like a whole person. At a certain point, it becomes difficult to balance between family, work and household. It starts to feel like you don't have time for friends at all. Don't buy into this! Associating with people who are also focused on their development will stimulate your life as well.

Not useful: spending everything on friends

Making time for friends and entertainment is important, but if you find that you are constantly going somewhere, it doesn’t fit into your budget anymore, and cleaning at home hasn’t even started for two weeks, then think: maybe you are deliberately avoiding something? People often drown themselves in alcohol when they have a problem, but in the morning they add another one - a hangover. With debts, temporary and financial, the same story.

Useful: setting limits

The word “no” is the key skill of a successful person. Take care of yourself, set emotional boundaries that will protect you and your well-being. Do not drag yourself into the ocean of other people's problems. Whether your overly dramatic girlfriend talks about the next meeting through Tinder, or your nervous mother is overprotective when you're well into your 15s, you'll have to be tough to set healthy boundaries.

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