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Feelings of not being good enough


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  • SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.

    Also visit the online treatment locator.

SAMHSA’s National Helpline, 1-800-662-HELP (4357) (also known as the Treatment Referral Routing Service), or TTY: 1-800-487-4889 is a confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders. This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations.

Also visit the online treatment locator, or send your zip code via text message: 435748 (HELP4U) to find help near you. Read more about the HELP4U text messaging service.

The service is open 24/7, 365 days a year.

English and Spanish are available if you select the option to speak with a national representative. Currently, the 435748 (HELP4U) text messaging service is only available in English.

In 2020, the Helpline received 833,598 calls. This is a 27 percent increase from 2019, when the Helpline received a total of 656,953 calls for the year.

The referral service is free of charge. If you have no insurance or are underinsured, we will refer you to your state office, which is responsible for state-funded treatment programs. In addition, we can often refer you to facilities that charge on a sliding fee scale or accept Medicare or Medicaid. If you have health insurance, you are encouraged to contact your insurer for a list of participating health care providers and facilities.

The service is confidential. We will not ask you for any personal information. We may ask for your zip code or other pertinent geographic information in order to track calls being routed to other offices or to accurately identify the local resources appropriate to your needs.

No, we do not provide counseling. Trained information specialists answer calls, transfer callers to state services or other appropriate intake centers in their states, and connect them with local assistance and support.

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    For additional resources, please visit the SAMHSA Store.

Last Updated: 08/30/2022

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Welcome to the Behavioral Health Treatment Services Locator, a confidential and anonymous source of information for persons seeking treatment facilities in the United States or U.S. Territories for substance use/addiction and/or mental health problems.

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5 ways to stop thinking that you are not good enough

Career

Psychologists admit that many people who have achieved serious heights turn to them for help, but at the same time seriously doubt that they deserve it. The misfortune, called the impostor syndrome, spares no one - both a university graduate who was lucky enough to get a well-paid job, and a highly experienced professional who suddenly received a promotion can feel like they have no right to success.

Imposter Syndrome - An inadequate feeling of (chronic) self-doubt despite clear evidence to the contrary. No matter how smart and efficient such people are, they feel like cheaters, and evil beliefs slowly sap their energy and motivation. They tend to think that achievements are the result of coincidence and they are not good enough to move on, competing with others at a higher level. As a result, decadent attitudes sabotage the development of success.

The term "Imposter Syndrome" was promulgated in 1978 by American psychologists Pauline Klance and Suzanne Imes, who discovered that many of their wards could not accept success, explaining their achievements by luck and the ability to pass for smart (th). This is not a diagnosis, but rather an obsessive mood that can manifest itself episodically and almost never means a real lack of knowledge and skills. The reverse situation is more common: an incompetent person does not worry about being incompetent.

Women are less fortunate in this sense - it is much easier for us to succumb to the impostor syndrome than for men. Analyzing in detail the gender tendency to self-criticism, psychologists at Carnegie Mellon University found, for example, that men put forward demands for a pay rise four times more often than women and usually ask for a raise of 30% more.

In short, if you've ever felt like you're not good enough, you're not alone. Objectively, there are millions of us, and harmful attitudes have stuck to us since childhood (hello to parents). The impostor syndrome is often accompanied by perfectionism, and such a duet turns a person into a workaholic, indifferent to career growth - a godsend for any boss. The good news is that you can try to change your perspective.

Here are five ways to get rid of the belief that you are not good enough:

1. Recognize your talents you start from scratch and got to this career stage thanks to personal talents and experience. Do not associate success with luck, recognize that you have genuine talents, otherwise you would not have what you have achieved.

Take a notepad and pen and write down your accomplishments and strengths in columns. Re-read both lists regularly, especially when you feel dreary. Such a reminder helps to get rid of doubts that you are not good enough and motivates you to unlock your potential.

2. Share with others what you know

It's easy to forget how far you've come and how much you've learned - look for opportunities to remind yourself and others of the competence you've acquired. Don't skimp on the knowledge you can share - sharing experiences, blogging, or mentoring will build confidence. In addition to benefiting others, this approach maintains a passion for what you do so that you do not burn out.

3. Get to know yourself

When doubts arise about your own worth, do not ignore the symptoms, but try to understand the causes of their occurrence. Don't believe the negative internal monologue - talk to yourself (not necessarily out loud) as if you were a close friend. Look into the subconscious, finding out from which mental hole the impostor syndrome sprouts. And be kind to yourself - turn off your inner “strict parent” by beating off your self-criticism with something more compassionate.

4. Accept praise with pleasure

People with impostor syndrome too often ignore kind words, devaluing personal success and achievements, as if unwilling to acknowledge them. Meanwhile, praise is the main weapon of motivation. When others recognize your work as outstanding, accept compliments with joy and no excuses, leaving a simple "thank you" in return.

And if, despite your best efforts, you are still suffering from the insidious syndrome, do not hesitate to seek professional help. Self-distrust undermines the nerves, which can lead to manifestations of anxiety and depression. A competent psychotherapist will help get rid of excessive self-criticism and build a relationship with your own success.

5. Don't be too serious

Changing activities changes how you feel. Do not forget to distract yourself with your favorite activities, hobbies and entertainment - give yourself permission to sometimes relax so that you do not take work and household tasks too seriously. Learn to enjoy the fruits of your labors - as you get a taste, you will see that you deserve everything you have.

Smirnova Natasha

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  • Career
  • Psychology

11 things to do when you think you're not good enough

Have you ever struggled with feelings of worthlessness? Did you ever feel like you looked like a loser compared to others? If you answered yes, then you can be proud of yourself: you have the courage to admit that something is wrong with you. And it should be noted that you are not alone in this. We all experience these symptoms from time to time.

Feeling that you are not good enough for something can make you stronger or, on the contrary, break you. Most likely, you would prefer to choose the first option. And in order to bring it to life and get rid of uncertainty in your abilities, there is a ready-made instruction.

1.

Stop comparing yourself to other people

We are all different, and the desire to be “just like that dude” kills your originality and self-love. Comparison with other people has a destructive effect on us, causing a feeling of worthlessness. It seems to us that everything around is smarter, more successful, richer and more beautiful than us, and often this feeling develops into envy. The more we compare ourselves to someone, the more we lose ourselves in trying to become someone. There is good advice: avoid competition - just go your own way for your dreams. And the only person you can and should compare yourself with is yourself in the past.

2. Remember your achievements

As soon as you start to wind yourself up, awakening thousands of thoughts in your head that you are not good enough, remember your successes. Any positive experience is a plus in the piggy bank of your life experience and knowledge. Perhaps you play the guitar or draw cool, or maybe you became the employee of the month or won prizes in various competitions (of course, not for reposting on social networks). Such memories from the past are an excellent antidote to destructive thoughts.

3. Dream realistically

We often think about how to achieve fame, success, make a name for ourselves, start earning a lot. This is a syndrome of people who live in a rapidly developing materialistic world. Only after such thoughts are we necessarily forced to return to the harsh reality in which your life does not intersect with luxury and six-figure salaries. What follows this? Disappointment. First of all, in yourself.

That's why it's so important to dream realistically - not to set yourself the goal of immediately moving to a high income or growing to the position of boss in a year. You can strive for this, but you still have to take dozens, or even hundreds of steps to the desired result. Nothing is given to us instantly, no matter how much effort we make.

There are no reasons that justify your not wanting to pursue your dreams

4. Focus on the process, not the result

If you want to achieve something, you must think not about the result, but about the process itself - how to make it as simple (as possible) and effective. Needless to say, the too tortuous path you have chosen can kill all your faith in yourself and your strengths? Surely you yourself know.

5. Stop visiting social media profiles

Of course, this is not about the accounts of your acquaintances or friends - these are about those profiles that broadcast exclusively positive moments of a person's life. Do you understand that this doesn't happen? Contrary to everything that various bloggers write, there are no ideal people in the world and there is no ideal life either. You feel insecure because you believe in all the happy pictures that appear in your news feed. Use social media wisely - stop letting it destroy your faith in yourself.

6. Stop living up to other people's expectations

If you are one of those people who tries to live up to the expectations of others, then in the end you risk losing not only these people, but also your individuality. Have you ever wondered how much longer you need to maintain a perfect image? As long as this continues, you cannot put your priorities ahead of other people's. You shouldn't try to look better than you really are.

7. Stop criticizing yourself

Think about it, are you lucky enough to have the basic things you need to live a happy life - food, clothing and shelter? If yes, then you are already happier than a fairly large part of the population of our planet. Therefore, whenever you start to think that you are not good enough, just look around and realize that if you were able to provide yourself with everything you need, then you have already done a great job on yourself and your life.

Why praise is more important than criticism

8. Choose the right people to share your experiences

There are people who can support and even give useful advice, and there are those who help you destroy your life with negativity. Therefore, you should share your experiences only with those who will not increase your self-doubt. Open up to those people who know you well and on whom you can absolutely rely.

9. Turn off the thinking mode for a while

This is not as difficult as it seems at first glance. The mind is a powerful tool that can both lift your mood and lower it to the very bottom in a split second. The same goes for self-confidence. Each of us faces difficult periods in life, and the best thing we can do is to let these thoughts pass without overthinking.

10. Try to revive yourself

Do not stand still, do not let negative thoughts destroy you. In most cases, physical activity will help you get rid of self-destructive experiences. For example, an ordinary workout: it will not only make you feel alive, but also release the hormones of happiness. A healthy body equals a healthy mind, and this is perhaps the best combination.

11. Express negativity

In reasonable amounts, of course. We need not only positive emotions, but also timely disposal of negative ones. This is the fastest way to end suffering. Alternatively, start saying what's bothering you out loud.

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