Feel like the world is against me

SAMHSA’s National Helpline | SAMHSA

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SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
Also visit the online treatment locator.

SAMHSA’s National Helpline, 1-800-662-HELP (4357) (also known as the Treatment Referral Routing Service), or TTY: 1-800-487-4889 is a confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders. This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations.

Also visit the online treatment locator, or send your zip code via text message: 435748 (HELP4U) to find help near you. Read more about the HELP4U text messaging service.

The service is open 24/7, 365 days a year.

English and Spanish are available if you select the option to speak with a national representative. Currently, the 435748 (HELP4U) text messaging service is only available in English.

In 2020, the Helpline received 833,598 calls. This is a 27 percent increase from 2019, when the Helpline received a total of 656,953 calls for the year.

The referral service is free of charge. If you have no insurance or are underinsured, we will refer you to your state office, which is responsible for state-funded treatment programs. In addition, we can often refer you to facilities that charge on a sliding fee scale or accept Medicare or Medicaid. If you have health insurance, you are encouraged to contact your insurer for a list of participating health care providers and facilities.

The service is confidential. We will not ask you for any personal information. We may ask for your zip code or other pertinent geographic information in order to track calls being routed to other offices or to accurately identify the local resources appropriate to your needs.

No, we do not provide counseling. Trained information specialists answer calls, transfer callers to state services or other appropriate intake centers in their states, and connect them with local assistance and support.

Suggested Resources
What Is Substance Abuse Treatment? A Booklet for Families
Created for family members of people with alcohol abuse or drug abuse problems. Answers questions about substance abuse, its symptoms, different types of treatment, and recovery. Addresses concerns of children of parents with substance use/abuse problems.
It's Not Your Fault (NACoA) (PDF | 12 KB)
Assures teens with parents who abuse alcohol or drugs that, "It's not your fault!" and that they are not alone. Encourages teens to seek emotional support from other adults, school counselors, and youth support groups such as Alateen, and provides a resource list.

After an Attempt: A Guide for Taking Care of Your Family Member After Treatment in the Emergency Department
Aids family members in coping with the aftermath of a relative's suicide attempt. Describes the emergency department treatment process, lists questions to ask about follow-up treatment, and describes how to reduce risk and ensure safety at home.
Family Therapy Can Help: For People in Recovery From Mental Illness or Addiction
Explores the role of family therapy in recovery from mental illness or substance abuse. Explains how family therapy sessions are run and who conducts them, describes a typical session, and provides information on its effectiveness in recovery.
For additional resources, please visit the SAMHSA Store.

Last Updated: 08/30/2022

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Welcome to the Behavioral Health Treatment Services Locator, a confidential and anonymous source of information for persons seeking treatment facilities in the United States or U.S. Territories for substance use/addiction and/or mental health problems.

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The Locator is authorized by the 21st Century Cures Act (Public Law 114-255, Section 9006; 42 U.S.C. 290bb-36d). SAMHSA endeavors to keep the Locator current. All information in the Locator is updated annually from facility responses to SAMHSA’s National Substance Use and Mental Health Services Survey (N-SUMHSS). New facilities that have completed an abbreviated survey and met all the qualifications are added monthly. Updates to facility names, addresses, telephone numbers, and services are made weekly for facilities informing SAMHSA of changes. Facilities may request additions or changes to their information by sending an e-mail to [email protected], by calling the BHSIS Project Office at 1-833-888-1553 (Mon-Fri 8-6 ET), or by electronic form submission using the Locator online application form (intended for additions of new facilities).

What to do when it seems that the whole world is against you

Elena Savinova
Psychologist

December 6, 2017

Author of the photo, Isaac Castillejos / Unsplash Or, to be more precise, they themselves believe that everything is bad with them.

And the most annoying thing is that they do not expect anything good from life. For all cases, they have certain stamps-settings. For example: fate is unfair, the country is not the same, youth is passing, work is bad, people cannot be trusted, and all men - you know who.

Paradoxically, women and men work in the same office next to such, to put it mildly, skeptics, who, in general, are not much more capable, more beautiful or smarter.

But their world is arranged differently. They love and are loved, enthusiastically talk about some working moments, argue passionately, draw future achievements in their imagination.

Psychologist's blog: how to get rid of the victim complex?

Of course, everything depends on the personal perception of reality. But sometimes even the brightest optimists have a hard time. From all sides you can only hear: something I have such a depression! Especially now, when the day ends before it starts, and the bright New Year holidays are still far away.

In order to prevent negative thoughts from taking over, one must know the enemy by sight. What triggers depression, and how not to succumb to it?

Black and white mask of depression

The author of the photo, Ian Espinosa / Unsplash

Our almost countryman, the famous American psychotherapist Aaron Beck, whose father is from Khmelnytsky, devoted his life to the study of melancholy, anxiety, and various phobias.

In his opinion, there is a so-called cognitive triad of depression.

Negative self-image: I am nothing. The same view of the world: it is cruel and dangerous, it is bad there.

And as a result, a person who thinks this way does not expect anything good from his life.

Why do we discriminate against psychotherapists?

In fact, we know that this is not so, but try to prove it to someone who does not see the prospects.

Depression, as you know, is a state when we do not see the future. Unlike euphoria, when on the contrary, we forget about the past. It is characterized by a narrowing of consciousness under the influence of the following factors:

Personalization - whatever happens, a person takes it personally. For example, that everyone wants to do bad things to him personally.

Thinking in extremes. The world is black and white. All are either friends or traitors, if not with me, then against me.

Psychologist's blog: fashion for indifference

Selective judgments. When, due to a petty detail - for example, a girl leaned over to a colleague to ask something, a scene of jealousy is drawn in the imagination.

Hit in "blind zones". Groundless self-flagellation due to the inability to see an objective picture. For example, a woman who is at work all day, leaving her child with her grandmother, concludes that she is a bad mother.

Tendency to overgeneralize. These are the well-known "all men are unfaithful, women are frivolous."

Exaggeration of consequences. If he doesn't call back, it's over between us. Didn't pass the interview - no one needs me.

"Automatic" thoughts by inheritance

image copyright, Randy Jacob / Unsplash

Image caption,

"Even if you were once unlucky, it doesn't mean that it will always be like this. But there will be something that you yourself want - a puddle under your feet or stars in a puddle"

Such patterns of negative perception or "automatic" thoughts, as Aaron Beck called them, are formed in childhood.

Perhaps the parents themselves were overly anxious and transmitted this attitude to the child. Or were too demanding. Hence, many people have the belief that someone should rate us. And in order to earn high marks, we must work hard all the time and convince others of our worth.

How to overcome such "cognitive distortions" in oneself? After all, it is they who prevent that lightness of being, thanks to which those who are not too diligent and serious are lucky.

To begin with, it is good to at least be aware of the existence of such attitudes in oneself. Next, you need to mentally separate yourself from your usual, but contradictory negative judgments about yourself and the world around you.

Psychologist's blog: what is gaslighting and how to resist it?

It's not easy. Because you will have to actually admit that you are wrong in what you previously thought was indisputable.

This way you will feel the difference between "I know that" (as it used to be) and "I believe" or "I think that" - that perception of reality, to which it is desirable to get used. Unless, of course, you want to be completely neurotic.

That is, instead of habitually clinging to the usual negative constructions like "everything is bad", or rather, hiding behind them, you realize that the world is not black and white, but multicolored.

And even if you were once unlucky, this does not mean at all that it will always be so. And it will be what you yourself want - a puddle under your feet or stars in a puddle.

Image copyright Fernando Pereira / Unsplash

What to do when everything around you is against you

7 September 2020Life

Often circumstances are not in our favor. The main thing we can do is to respond to them correctly.

There is an endless stream of internal and external signals that lead us astray. Marshall Goldsmith, a well-known business expert and best-selling author, who has been translated into 30 languages, tells how to counter them and even use them to your advantage.

How triggers work

Triggers are the signals that influence our behavior. Why is it so difficult for us to fight them? We are just used to responding to them in a certain way.

Getting out of the habit loop is not easy, but it is possible. First you need to understand that this process consists of three stages: a signal (trigger), a template and a reward. For example, for a smoker, the cue might be stress, the pattern might be nicotine use, and the reward might be temporary stress relief.

The best way to break a habit is to change the pattern while keeping the reward and signal.

No wonder some people start eating a lot when they quit smoking: this is their new reaction to stress. Of course, this is not the best solution, because instead of delicious pies, you can just as well choose jogging around the stadium or relaxing music.

Now let's see what other triggers are present in our lives and how we can change our behavior pattern.

What triggers get in your way

Adverse circumstances

Boxing philosopher Mike Tyson said, "Everyone has a plan until they get kicked in the face." Traveling along the road of life, most often this blow we receive from the environment.

Sometimes it seems to us that the whole world is against us. We can get angry at the cashier who incorrectly counted the change, give up if a colleague suddenly fell ill and did not make the report we needed, get upset because of the flight cancellation. But these are all wrong reactions.

It is pointless to be angry at circumstances. This is the same as being offended by a burned out light bulb. Do not be upset and blame someone for what happened. Calm down, accept the situation as it is, and act on it.

Mistakes by others

Does your subordinate make a spelling mistake in a presentation and you tell him off in front of everyone? The wife is late for the performance, and you say: “Well, I told you that you need to get ready faster”? A friend makes a risky act, you argue that you would definitely have acted differently?

Pointing out people's faults and showing how smart you are is definitely not the best way to keep a good relationship. And most importantly, so you do not fix anything.

If you catch yourself in such reactions, learn to stop in time. Do not rush to prove your case, but think about how you can actually change the situation and help others.

Fatigue

Sometimes, after a hard day at work, we feel so exhausted that we don't notice how our ability to control ourselves decreases. The consequences can be different: instead of an evening workout, someone allows himself to lie on the couch, someone takes out the accumulated aggression on the household, and someone makes a disastrous decision at a business meeting.

As with everything else, learning to recognize the trigger and how you react to it is the most important step in correcting it. Be more attentive to everything you say and do in the evening after a busy day. To avoid trouble, schedule the most tedious meetings in the morning. Then make big decisions.

Try to save energy. A great way to do this is to make a clear plan of action for the day and follow it without being distracted by other things.

Distractions

Have you ever had to waste your work time talking to colleagues, texting on social media, or endlessly checking email? You are not alone.

Modern man is forced to work among many distractions. But if you do not resist them, you will definitely face a mountain of unfinished business, fatigue and stress.

How to avoid this? Make two lists. In the first, list the most important tasks for the day and indicate the time when you will do them. For example, from seven to eight you train, from nine to one you finish the report, from two to five you meet with clients, and from six to ten you are completely devoted to your family. In the second list, list everything that can prevent you from achieving your goals.

You may realize that a friend who constantly stops at your table and adjusts to your leisure time in the evening is actually a distraction trigger. Then you need to "fire" him for a while. Or you will find that you regularly skip the morning workout, because after waking up you spend a lot of time on social networks. Force yourself to change this habit. Do not be distracted by anything until you do what you planned.

Productive triggers

It would be hard to list absolutely all negative triggers and our reactions to them. But now you can determine for yourself what signals are preventing you from achieving what you want. Noticing them and adjusting your behavior is half the battle.

The next step is to create a network of productive triggers that lead you to your goal. It can be any signal that encourages action.

For example, ask a friend to remind you to exercise at a certain time.

Learn more