Tired of being an afterthought

I’m Officially Tired Of Being An Afterthought

I’m tired of being your second choice and not being your priority, when I always put you first.

It seems that you only come to me when you have nowhere else to go, and that for all these years you’ve been treating me like your last resort and safety net.

I don’t expect to be the centre of your world and I never asked you to disregard your entire life just because I came along.

However, I’m your girlfriend and I shouldn’t be the one you call only when everyone else has stood you up or abandoned you.

The one you come to for reassurance that you’re still important to someone, or the one you use as an ego boost.

I’m sick of having to fit in to your plans, like my schedule doesn’t matter.

I’m weary of having to wait the whole day for you to decide whether you can be bothered to come and pick me up like we agreed, and of putting my entire life on hold for you.

I’m done waiting for you to choose me. Done with patiently waiting for you to get your shit together and realize that you should start treating me better.

Done with comparing myself to your exes and every other girl near you.

Done with competing with your career, with your hobbies, clubbing, and everything else that is obviously more important than me.

Done with giving you time to make up your mind.

I’m tired of feeling like second best. And that is exactly how you make me feel – like you’re with me just because I’m the only one available and that you’ll dump me as soon as someone better comes along.

Because guess what – I’m a catch, even though you fail to see it.

This might sound as cocky but I have a lot to offer – I’m pretty, smart, interesting, have a great sense of humour and everyone enjoys my company. That is – everyone but you.

Most importantly – I’m an awesome girlfriend. And I will be the best for someone who sees my worth and who knows how to appreciate it.

I’m done begging for your love and affection.

Done with chasing you around to be with me, done with feeling like I’m forcing you to stay in this relationship and done with settling for bread crumbs of your attention.

I’m done with acting like I won the jackpot every time you treat me the way a normal boyfriend should treat the girl he loves.

Done with envying all the other couples who have mature, healthy relationships and I’m done with hoping that one day, ours will become the same.

I’m tired of being the only one trying, while you put no effort into our relationship at all.

Tired of making all the sacrifices, being the one to constantly initiate contact, and of being the only one trying to push us forward.

I’m tired of being the only one who believes in us as a couple and being the only one trying to save this relationship, which is obviously doomed to fail.

I’m done settling for less and putting up with the fact that you don’t love me enough. Yes, that’s the truth, so let’s start calling things by their rightful name.

Let’s cut the crap – it’s not that you’re “like that”, it’s not that you have trouble showing emotion, that this is your way of showing affection or your maximum – you don’t love me enough, never did and never will.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying that you’re completely indifferent. In fact, I bet you care for me to a certain extent but I want and deserve more.

I’m tired of giving you endless second chances.

Sick of your false promises that one of these days, things between us will change and that you’ll finally become the man you should have been since day one.

Because – let’s face it: that will never happen. And it’s about time for me to accept the harsh truth.

I’m done living in constant fear that you’ll abandon me. Done being afraid that one day, you’ll just vanish from my life, without any closure or a proper explanation.

So, I’m leaving you. Yes, you heard that right – I’m breaking up with you and this time, I’m not making an empty threat so you’ll come to your senses for a few days.

I’m walking away because I would rather be alone and wait for a man who will give me the place I deserve than continue being your afterthought.

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Making Yourself a Priority Instead of an Afterthought

Self-care is a term that has been popping up more and more as we as a society try to balance our mind, bodies, and souls in an age where technology has the forefront and everything is go-go-go.

I first heard the term when I began seeing a counselor to help with my anxiety; as we spoke, he asked me what I was doing “for me.” Every week, we took a moment to discuss how I was treating myself and what I was treating myself to.

It took some time for me to realize that I wasn’t making myself a priority the way I should have.

Instead, I was exerting all my time and energy into a job I didn’t like and I was using the left-over bits of energy to take care of myself when everything was said and done.

That method left me feeling exhausted because I was constantly trying to do everything I could to make myself happy without really thinking about what it was that I was doing.

I thought having a “normal” full-time job where I could try to climb the corporate ladder would make me feel more like an adult, and make me feel like I was succeeding.

In my social life, I tried to be active and meet up with friends constantly to maintain that bubble of friendship we all had in college when we live with our closest friends. I was constantly texting, setting up phone and Skype dates, and meeting friends after work or on weekends to socialize.

For someone who is a bit more introverted than she originally realized, I quickly became burnt out because my job involved me talking on the phone all day as well.

When I started seeing a counselor and talking about all the stress and anxiety I felt, I slowly began to realize that I was doing everything I could do make others happy because I thought that was how I would find happiness.

Don’t get me wrong, I find great joy in helping others and being a supportive friend. But, I also learned that I needed to be okay with saying “no” to things.

So, I began my journey of “self-care” with trial and error.

At first, my definition of self-care was going straight home after work rather than staying and socializing with my coworkers (because all we ended up talking about was work anyway), or spending Friday nights watching Netflix and eating homemade macaroni and cheese.

Slowly, I started asking myself “what am I interested in?” and “what do I want to do?”

Eventually, I learned that I liked taking yoga classes and walking in the park while listening to music. I also enjoyed spending time with friends in settings other than bars, and started to go to more museums. I eventually learned what it was that made me feel either more wholly happy, uplifted from a funk, or happy and inspired.

Some days, I need to say “no” when a friend invites me to a social gathering or out for dinner, and other days I need to say “yes” to an evening of yoga and Netflix. Sometimes, I have to make myself text every friend I have in the city because I really want to hang out with a friend but am feeling shy about reaching out.

Most of all, I say “yes” and “no” to the things I want to without feeling guilty about not being “fun enough” because I stayed in on a Saturday night or for “being lazy” by spending Sunday morning reading in bed with a mug of tea.

Self-care is about listening to your own set of needs and wants.

Sometimes, I want to chill out and watch a movie because I can’t imagine talking to one more person, and sometimes I want to be socializing with a friend but I haven’t been invited out, so I encourage myself to just pick up my phone and make a plan.

With figuring out what my self-care definition is, I’ve also learned to step outside my comfort zone.

For example, I really love museums but rarely go because I don’t want to go alone and my friends often aren’t interested in the exhibit that’s showing. I was expressing my desire to go to the museum to a friend of mine who had lived abroad for a year and she told me to just go. She relayed how she struggled making friends in a foreign country and had to count on herself sometimes to be her own friend.

As silly as it sounded, I realized I needed to be my own friend and be my own date to the museum if I wanted to go. And I went.

I went to the art museum on the day of my 25th birthday and enjoyed it more than I ever had before because I got to wander around my favorite paintings, stick to my own schedule, and contemplate my life. It was rejuvenating and satisfying—I was proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and happy that I did.

Whether you define “self-care” for yourself as running a few nights each week after work or practicing your painting skills with watercolors on the weekend, it’s important to figure out what makes you happy for you.

Self-care doesn’t have any expectations, it has no need of worrying about anyone else, and serves only to bring you peace, calm, rest, and joy.

It doesn’t have to be something that you do twice a year like visiting the dentist. You just need to find an activity that you like, just because you like it, not because it is the latest trend or because everyone in your family has done it before you.

Just think about what you really want to do, and go out and do it. (Or stay in and do it!)

And as a fun bonus, be sure to check out this 30 Day Self-Care Challenge!

How To Create Your Own Self-Care Routine (Plus a Free Workbook!)
The Truth About Self Care
How To Balance Your Job With Extra Responsibilities While Still Taking Care of Yourself

About the Author

Marina is the Managing Editor here at GenTwenty. With a B.A. in French and an MFA in Creative Writing, she is a Writing Coach helping creatives bring their ideas to the page. Learn more about how to work with her at www.marinacrousewrites.com. In her free time, you'll find her reading, cooking, traveling, or binge-watching sitcoms on Netflix.

Website: www.marinacrousewrites.com

quotes, aphorisms, sayings and thoughts of great and smart people — page 6

poems people

#1310036

Close your eyes. You won't dream of such a thing,
you feel it inside -
an instant trembling impulse along your eyelashes,
as if squeezed in your palms: "repeat" ...
When you find the sky for flight,
you kiss the wings that take you up.
Open my eyes. I know who you are
with the wrong side of sleepy motionless eyelids.

Panic attacks of approach.
My step counting second,
prepares the target's trajectory,
shoots down and says "run!"

Posted by Nonstop 02 Oct 2019

life poems

#1349043

Belated, late late, hidden haze.
A series of unread dreams and random passwords.
And the hand that led and led - brought to the corner,
crossroads, where everyone remained in their chosen role.
This world is lifeless and capricious, like the waves in winter,
left me believing in an invisible rampage of doubt.
That the number left in my address book,
, will never be erased. And my memory grows wiser.

However, there are too many of those numbers - that I can't tear out and memorize,
: wiping the dust off them, I involuntarily weaken.
Here is one…

Posted by Nonstop 24 Dec 2019

love poems people0007 You can't escape fate, as usual.
Therefore, in hotel rooms
Soul imprints cover lies.

Here he is, in some November
Will drop everything. Will risk surviving the sunset,
And she, falling in love with his migraine,
In any languages subject to her

Will lie, filming him alive,
Heaps of promises, ardor confessions.
From love habitually fly together,
Sheltering wings from the crowd.

Posted by NSTOP on Nonstop 12, 2016

Poems

#1301410

From some infinitely complete
single bottom
to excess visual content
of an extraordinary day
In the usual template resource
, imperial for
of those who bathe
souvenirs from the bathroom. ship

Following the course of logic
one should be bold
Do not be afraid of torn principles
finished ships
Victimology of memory

Posted by Nonstop Sep 13, 2019

life poetry

#1393608

On the map of the body, each continent
is explored by the freedom of wet speech.
And outside of you, there were not and are not
neither the right words nor the correct adverbs.
You will answer - and in the darkness it will sing
under the torture of hands, where I fly all my life,
a living heart - maybe yours,
capable of smelling me through:

now I'm all - under the firefight of torment,
I'm standing, growing into the abyss of excuses.
So you, mindless,
live inside, scratching for years.

Posted by Nonstop 24 Mar 2020

life poems

#1404190

About what will not linger inside ...
It will come down in a wave, depriving me of a plot,
as an uninhabited stronghold of the last rhymes,
as a song that is completed and sung. nine0007 Like an echo of light on someone else's window -
the deepening brilliance of keyholes.
Like everything that you will remain in me
and everyone to whom we will not tell about it.

Are miracles shameful?
Is it about not knowing miracles yourself,
you came out beautiful on order,
throwing a phrase in my face after a phrase,
removing unnecessary enmity from your lips,

poems people

#1286827

Read me --
The way you can:
subtle, silent, complex.
Shut up! - Everything is as it should be.
Rum started, the ice crumbled.

I suffer from lack of sleep/unwillingness.

We exchange phone numbers,
to one day get tangled in wires:
“You ****** me, right?”

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday…
…lips, palms, hair.

Posted by Nonstop 11 Aug 2019

poems people

#1288975

Past Simple

If it's about us, then you want to use the past tense and say "were".

Trite, like this:
"We were happy."
"We fell out of love."
"We spent our lives on tons of verbal dust, never becoming something mature, cultural, big."

Now don't write about anything.

So much empty, hot, miserable ashes. nine0007

Posted by Nonstop 16 Aug 2019

poems people

#1373058

"You were fascinated by me. I am fascinated by murderers. Murder is not smoking for you. You can quit smoking." Richard Osborn, "Basic Instinct" "...Exactly so it happens in a dream; but the fact that you did not cling - victory is revealed: for suffering in a dream, we have the right wake up at once and with trembling in the body dig your fingers into the edge of the bed." Joseph Brodsky, "In memory of T.B." nine0003

The darkness is empty: no return, no surrender, no stop.
No matter how many films you watch - ingenious simplicity.
I open my eyes, sending current across the screen.
It's over. Everything worked out. Everything is filmed! Stop!

I let go, I forgot what you taught me:
"When leaving, don't look back, take the keys,
Drink up the silence, fly away beyond the earth's edge,
And when you wake up, don't die anymore."

Posted by Nonstop Feb 12, 2020

poems people

#1389439

Like everything for which I could love you
, burning cities and countries,
so memory, coming to life in the corners,
reaches the extinguished screen
and bites into the darkness pupil -
painfully scratching blindly.
Like the lines that you didn't read once,
they trade your soul in your lifetime.

So, having taken a step out of the permafrost,
you leave the usual square
into a crowd of people obviously empty,
but the silence is calling you back:
become related to the burning inside,

Posted by Nonstop 16 Mar 2020

life poems

#1335580

"There will be no mercy..."
-- like music, like a refrain.
Cruel weekdays in a smoky November mix so wetly, preparing meeting routes, getting ready to cross a double continuous line.

Evening fairy tales in captivity of your shoulder. Common: Hello. And I open a chat. Cold as space. “Are you afraid? Don't get used to it!" Riddles for adults. nine0007 And you are an incredible thrill.

Delight is inevitable.
At the peak of your heights, I die blindly, losing my face. So just about different things. Such a war inside: about will and reason, where the will is doomed to descend directly into the hands of the one who deprived it.

Forecasters lie and in the sky of my soul no constellations are visible - you are one indivisible. The cyclone is ubiquitous and the sun threatens to cool.

The presumption of growth is to think seriously about the game.
It's excruciating to just breathe without asking a question and hold back the solo like music that's on fire. nine0007

Posted by Nonstop Nov 26, 2019

love poetry

#1288457

It's not a thing if it doesn't have swing
/Duke Ellington/

That's it, Mr. Ellington is alive,
He left his mourning world
Orchestral punishing swing
Electric taste of the soul
Sleep, die, don't call
In these sounds, no one to anyone
Will not let you leave the prison
I'm tired of being the cause of love

Posted by Nonstop Aug 15, 2019

time

#831482

Time that won't end
No matter how much you waste it.
Name deprived of sleep and patronymic,
Tearing into my notebook.

Where does it take you, what waves
Are you naked?
We are born infinitely free:
Our love is everywhere.

No matter how long you hide in my epigraphs,
We can't finish the fight.
Our war is lost to the end -
I stay with you.

Posted by Autumn Jazz Nov 02, 2015

feelings of life

#480594

My love, you are almost gone.
Looking for your scent, trying to breathe.
What kind of incomprehensible composition
Should a loving soul have?
You are almost gone. Happiness is perishable.
Do not expect repeated joy in anything:
Love, it is in the Singular, but Praise be to the one who is caught ...

Published by Version April 30, 2013

life poems people

#1173728

The habit is to bless for ages.
I enter the fire - like a ball. Like from a ship.

Until the Lord died and froze,
I try to come true three times in the spring.
I am looking, I am looking, I am looking for you with my eyes -
I will find and I will not fall asleep until dawn. nine0003

Words do not choose in whom to happen.
The melody cannot but sound.
When others pronounce "happiness",
Out of habit I open a chat
and try on rhymes for the seasons,
And then I burn brochures and volumes.

Posted by Nonstop Nov 23, 2018

life poems

#1333881

in the backyards of icy autumn
arguing with the off-season to the point of hoarseness,
someone's gaze says goodbye not to me,
demanding to cool down.

to cover the revenge for sure,
please be patient until the morning,
cling to the sleeve of desperation
and rip off the stopcock.

switch to a whisper, step back,
defuse the clip, shoot at the words,
I didn't swear to his eyes,
that's why I'm alive.

Posted by Nonstop Nov 23, 2019

life poems

#1356413

The art of entering from afar. nine0007 Wait for the last call for years,
and reset the call to zero,
outgrowing everyone who was hurt.
On the thin ice of familiar scenery.
Under the weight of great films.

Under the heading of secrets, in a silent farewell,
Like a ghost of the night, an inanimate phantom,
suddenly collided with reality,
suddenly retreats, breaking the thread.
Feeling the difference between taste and smell,
which nothing can reset.

Posted by Nonstop Jan 09, 2020

life poems

#1429081

To the question: what do you find in them? -
I want to fix the broken ones,
Checking how strong the armor is,
When they hit me.
Favorite boys. The essence of everything.
Look how beautiful the downed wolf is.
Capable of many things, like a titan:
Lies and reads you from a sheet.

Give him tenderness. Thick June.
Dangerous confession on the edge.
Letter paper - write an answer,
And later, patted on the head,
Don't give away the secret of fortified wines.

Posted by Nonstop May 29, 2020

love poems

#1426958

Hundreds of leagues drunk to the end -
dried up stream of memories
struggled and rushed to the sparks of impeccable exclamations. nine0007 Over the years, crossed out
and overturned meetings in one gulp.

It's impossible to describe everything - absolute paradise:
groundless, soundless, incorporeal.
numbers memorized to death,
clothes hastily thrown in a chair.
Frozen hand, flush of cheeks,

Posted by Nonstop May 25, 2020

life poems

#1317491

0007 from the face of the earth, pronounce me
barely audibly. This is how saucers
tremble in an empty dressing table, where the dust is more alive than words,
where everyone who has descended from the pedestal is remembered.
Reading me is a simple craft.
Life is more difficult when I stopped writing

. Dawns will become colder,
and the nights are quieter than wet excuses,
leave me the last of the shadows.
And I will disappear at midnight. But one day
nothing will sound and silence

Posted by Nonstop 18 Oct 2019

Lyrics – Surganova & Orchestra

# S AND B AT G D AND W And To L M H O P R FROM T At F X C H W E I am

Choose first letter#SABVGJZIKLMNOPRSTUFHTSCHSHEYA

White people

painful

was a dream

Babylon

in the house

Bicycle

Close 9000 Close 9000 Close 9000 Close 9000 Close 9000 Close 9000 Close

Close 9000 from the fields

In the sky full of stars

Air

She-wolf

Raven

Here you are

This is awkwardly

Time

Knowledge time

All will be held

All over

Close 9000 Close

Highness

In this city of lights

Somewhere out there

Gertrude

9000 Close40003

Blue cities

Racing

Mount

D 'Arc

Twit hours of separation

General girl

Boy girl

Volunteer

Good evening

rain

Until now

for each other

Soul

Live 9000 Close

9000 Close

Take it

Tomorrow

Follow you

Sound the guitar

0003

dugout

Golden spot

Gold of my hair (Live)

and

of the depths

9000 9000 9000 9000 9000 to ELOIS to Elos CLOSE

Catapult

Katyusha

Clown

When you get tired

002 Cradle

chain mail

Communal rock and roll

ships

blood 9000 9000 9000 Close 9000 ° Close 9000 Curator

Chicken

Leningrad

Summer

Autumn shower

004 Close

Persons

Best lot

Favorite City

Cute girl (Live)

I am with you

My view

My little redhead

My first

My way 9Do not leave

HEARCH

Really not I

Night

Well, that's all

Close 9000 I'm lying (Live)

Promised snow

Autumn Highway (feat. Nastya Poleva)

Leave

Close0003

Puzzles

Poron

Song about the distant homeland

Peter

on the road

PLATS (BONUS)

Time to hit the road

Portuguese

Premonition of death

Get used to it

Aliens came

Songbird

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