Platonic romantic relationship


What Is a Platonic Relationship? Examples and Differences

  • A platonic relationship is one without romance but is still loving, loyal, respectful, and honest.
  • Platonic relationships can involve intimacy like sex as long as feelings of passion are absent. 
  • A platonic life partnership is when people in a platonic relationship become primary partners.

The word "love" often evokes an image of a happy couple. But, in reality, romantic love is only one type of loving relationship you'll experience throughout your life. 

Yes, there's your bond with a significant other, but there are also connections with friends, siblings, and neighbors, to name a few. These relationships center on platonic love and offer additional support outside of a romantic partner.

Here's what you need to know about navigating and growing platonic relationships in your life.  

What is a platonic relationship?

Platonic quite literally means the absence of romance. You may have a platonic relationship with your best friend, a coworker, a cousin, a workout buddy, or any person you value in your life. 

According to Emily Guarnotta, a licensed clinical psychologist and founder of The Mindful Mommy, characteristics of platonic relationships include:

  • Respect
  • Love
  • Admiration 
  • Loyalty
  • Honesty
  • Bonding over shared interests and beliefs

"Platonic love is what we feel when there is trust, safety, and validation in a close relationship. It's the sense of feeling good and cared for in a relationship," says Nikki Coleman, a licensed psychologist with her own practice, Dr. Nikki Knows. 

Platonic relationship vs. romantic relationship 

There are many benefits of platonic relationships that romantic ones don't always offer. For example, a platonic relationship may entail fewer expectations and pressures, less stress about your physical experience, and possibly a more stable connection as there isn't a fear of breakup, says Guarnotta. Most notably, platonic relationships are not passionate, which often means they don't include overt sexuality. 

Platonic relationships also provide an opportunity to explore different parts of yourself and build unique experiences and memories with friends, says Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, a clinical psychologist at Lenox Hill Hospital. 

Cultivating platonic relationships can also help your health. In a large 2010 review, researchers found people with strong social relationships had a 50% higher likelihood of living longer than those without them. 

Important: If you're in a monogamous romantic relationship, a platonic relationship is generally not considered cheating. Exceptions to this are platonic relationships with dynamics that cross a monogamous partner's boundaries whether that's sexual, emotional, or financial intimacy.  

Platonic relationships and intimacy 

A platonic relationship can involve intimacy, such as sex and cuddling, if romantic feelings (aka passion) are not involved.

"All romantic relationships are not sexual, and all sexual relationships are not romantic. You could very well have an important someone in your life who creates all of those feelings of intimacy and closeness associated with platonic love but not romantic love," says Coleman. 

Note: Before committing to a sexually intimate platonic relationship, aka "friends with benefits," it's crucial each person feels safe and consents to physical intimacy, says Coleman.

Before bringing sexual intimacy into the equation, it's important to ask yourself what the end goal for the relationship is: In a 2020 study of friends with benefits relationships, people who wanted to transition to a friendship were successful 59% of the time. In contrast, those who sought a romantic relationship only achieved it 15% of the time.  

Intimacy in a platonic relationship only works when both people are on the same page. If one person starts developing romantic feelings and the other doesn't reciprocate, then it could lead to negative feelings like rejection or resentment, says Coleman. 

Communicating boundaries is critical for ensuring no one receives or sends mixed signals in a platonic, but sexually intimate, relationship. "Taking the time to have an uncomfortable conversation upfront will save all parties so much time, confusion, and frustration," says Romanoff.

According to Guarnotta, potential boundaries to consider in a platonic relationship are:

  • Incorporating or limiting physical intimacy
  • Consistent respect for each other
  • Avoiding topics of disagreement or discomfort 
  • Not letting conflict fester without discussion

What are platonic life partnerships?

Platonic life partnerships, or PLPs, are when people in a platonic relationship commit to making it their primary partnership. They may choose to cohabitate, raise children, or sometimes marry. 

A similar type of relationship is a queerplatonic partnership, which also bucks the heterosexual norms of romance and sex when it comes to committing to another person. 

In both cases, a couple's commitment is based on a strong emotional bond instead of a romantic or sexual connection. 

Though the terms are relatively new, they stem from earlier practices like the "Boston marriage" in the late 19th and early 20th century, when two (usually wealthy) women would eschew a traditional marriage and instead build a household together. 

People today may be attracted to PLPs or queerplatonic relationships because they offer benefits of a committed partnership, such as mutual respect and support, without the pressure to become physically intimate or submit to traditional monogamist ideals.

Quick tip: PLPs are getting attention thanks to people sharing their experiences on social media. For more information, check out April Lee on TikTok, who lives in Los Angeles with her platonic life partner and gives PLP tips and advice. 

Insider's takeaway 

Platonic relationships differ from romantic relationships but are no less loving or important. In fact, platonic relationships can provide additional support, respect, and loyalty outside of a romantic partner. 

Unlike romantic love, platonic relationships usually have less pressure surrounding physical appearance, expectations, and commitments. 

While platonic relationships can be sexually intimate, parties involved should always establish boundaries and consent before doing so.

Sarah Fielding

Sarah Fielding is a freelance writer covering a range of topics with a focus on mental health and women's issues.  She is also the co-founder of Empire Coven, a space for highlighting trailblazing women across New York.

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Platonic Relationship VS Romantic Relationship: 7 Key Differences

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A standard romantic relationship of “boy meets girl” can be uncertain, but when you feel an attraction that’s not physical, you may wonder if you’re somehow broken. Platonic relationships, where you love someone but have no physical desire for that person, are increasingly becoming an accepted norm

My first partner and I were quite confused when we preferred to be friends instead of lovers. I decided to learn more about the platonic relationship vs romantic relationship concept. Here’s what I discovered. 

What You Will Learn

  • What Are Platonic VS Romantic Relationships?
  • Benefits of a Platonic Relationship
    • Less Stress and More Support
    • Better Communication Skills
    • Belonging and Home
    • Deeper Trust
    • Giving and Receiving Love
    • Better Health
  • Negatives of Being in a Platonic Relationship
  • Platonic Relationship VS Romantic Relationship: 7 Key Differences
    • Difference #1. No Sex
    • Difference #2. Absence of Passion
    • Difference #3. Less Performance Pressure
    • Difference #4. Relationship Equality
    • Difference #5. Less Complications and More Time to Grow
    • Difference #6. You Can Talk About Others
    • Difference #7. Conflict vs Compromise
  • Final Thoughts on Platonic Relationship VS Romantic Relationship

What Are Platonic VS Romantic Relationships?

A platonic relationship is a relationship that is based on deep love for another person. However, your love is triggered and enriched by the person’s intellect, personality, quirks, and presence… and not purely by their physical existence or attraction. 

Platonic relationships aren’t confined by the gender of the two (or more) partners involved in the relationship. It can be a same-sex couple, opposite-sex couple, or even “differently” gendered couples. The core principle is that the partners love each other deeply, without there being a need for physical intimacy. 

When you have a platonic love relationship, you are more interested in spending time together, being great friends, supporting each other, and being happy together than in having children, making love, or physical touching. 

In contrast to this, a romantic relationship is based on physical attraction firstly. Hot flushes when your partner looks at you, a desire to be physically closer, making love frequently, and feeling thrilled by each touch are all par for the course with romantic love.  

In a platonic relationship, you may not want to engage in physical or sexual acts with your partner, which can be confusing because you’re being told by society that it’s the way of things to have sex, have children, and do it again.

You may wonder if your libido is like a bonsai or if you’re just weird. It can be very lonely when you don’t know how to explain to your partner that you don’t want intimacy

Benefits of a Platonic Relationship

As with all things in life, there are benefits and negatives to being in a platonic relationship. In some respects, it may even be better to choose a platonic relationship over a romantic one. Here are some benefits to consider: 

Less Stress and More Support

Platonic relationships aren’t driven by hormones or social pressures. You don’t have to worry about having kids by X-time or being the “man of the house. ” Instead, you can simply focus on accepting your partner and know that they already accept you. 

Platonic relationships aren’t confined by the gender of the two (or more) partners involved in the relationship.

Stress is often generated when we don’t feel fully supported or respected. The real beauty of a platonic relationship is that you’re friends first, partners second. Whatever happens, you know your partner has your back, and you’ve got theirs.

In a platonic relationship, you and your partner focus on being there for each other, supporting and loving each other more than you focus on being attractive or maintaining some idealized version of yourself. With less of the urge to please, you feel less stressed and know peace each day. 

Better Communication Skills

Let’s face it, not everyone can hold a great conversation. There are some people who can’t talk to save their life due to their lack of communication skills. In a platonic relationship, you can build great communication skills because your partner is more interested in what you have to say than in only physical closeness. 

Sharing “this or that questions” is a great way to really get the communication ball rolling. 

Because a platonic relationship allows you to show compassion and freely express how you’re feeling, you will get better at speaking and voicing your thoughts. Happiness happens when you create a safe space to share and be heard with your partner as they are firstly your friend.

Belonging and Home

When you’re with someone who values you for you, not for what you can do for them, you are in a real relationship that’s open to challenges but still welcomes you back home. That relationship is your home, no matter what. Because platonic partners are more interested in each other’s happiness, they tend to focus on belonging and building a sense of home. The result is a more peaceful relationship. 

Deeper Trust

With the right communication, you and your platonic partner can build deeper trust as there is less sexual tension in the relationship. You are less inclined to fear your partner will cheat on you when your love is platonic. 

Platonic relationships are the next level of friendships where you’ve put aside your ego to really invest in your partner for their own benefit. 

Giving and Receiving Love

When you trust your partner so completely, talk about your feelings in an open way, and feel like you belong, you will feel like you can give more love, while also receiving more love. There really are no strings attached. 

Better Health

Since you’re in a more peaceful relationship when it’s platonic, you are also boosting your overall health more. Better health is a direct result of a reduction in stress levels. When you are assured your platonic partner won’t simply walk out on you, it becomes more possible to take better care of yourself.

Self-care is important and your platonic partner is more inclined to help you experience that than your romantic partner would. 

Negatives of Being in a Platonic Relationship

The main negative aspect of a platonic relationship is that you fall for it deeply. Losing that connection hurts. If you have a sexual relationship with your platonic partner, you can lose the platonic relationship and suffer the end of the original platonic relationship. 

A romantic relationship is based on physical attraction firstly.

If it doesn’t work out between you and your platonic partner when you push for the relationship to become romantic, you will feel this in the same way you would if there was a break in trust or infidelity. 

The best way to move to a romantic relationship in your platonic relationship is to be up front and discuss everything with your partner, making sure you both want to transition to a romantic and physical relationship. Neither party should feel pressured. 

Platonic Relationship VS Romantic Relationship: 7 Key Differences

Knowing what the benefits and negatives are of a platonic relationship vs romantic relationship, it’s time to look at some differences too. The following differences help us understand the pros and cons of both of these relationships. 

Difference #1. No Sex

OK, let’s get the elephant out of the room: sex. The main difference between platonic and romantic relationships is that a platonic relationship doesn’t involve any sexual intimacy. However, there may be limited physical intimacy in the form of hugs and holding hands. 

When it comes to kissing and sharing physical space in a sexual way (such as hugging when naked), you move into a romantic relationship. 

The moment a platonic relationship dips (pardon the pun) into sexual intimacy, it is no longer a platonic relationship, and the catch is that you can’t always or easily go back to a platonic relationship once you’ve crossed that line.  

Difference #2. Absence of Passion

When you’re in a platonic relationship, you would rather use words like “caring,” “compassionate,” or “friendship” to describe your relationship. Your partner means the world to you, and you would literally walk through fire for them, but you don’t “burn” for them

Romantic relationships are characterized by words like “passion,” “chemistry,” or “desire.” While a romantic relationship is also about partnership, it is more about a deep physical desire for the other person to be with them non-stop and not being able to “get enough of them.”

Difference #3. Less Performance Pressure

Romantic couples are always looking for the next thing to do together. They read up on new sexual positions, couples activities, and see counselors because they fear they will lose what they have—any candle will burn dimly over time. The quest to keep their relationship alive will create pressure to be more “in love” than ever.  

A platonic relationship is less pressured to “be alive in your relationship.” Instead, it’s like a good and worn-out sofa on a rainy day with no pressure to be or do or go or show. Platonic partners know they love each other, and they are instinctively there for each other, even when there’s a distance between them. Their connection is deep enough and rooted in their friendship, so they don’t have to prove they love each other. 

Difference #4. Relationship Equality

If you’ve ever been in a relationship where you felt like you had to do something for the other person because they did something for you, then you are in a romantic relationship. Romantic partners are constantly keeping score—even if they do it subconsciously. Where there is a burning passion, there is also envy.

In a romantic relationship, you will constantly be trying to show off to the person you love, instead of simply living that love.  

When you have a platonic love relationship, you are more interested in spending time together, being great friends, supporting each other, and being happy together than in having children, making love, or physical touching. 

Platonic partnerships are different in that they are utterly selfless. Instead of trying to impress your partner, you simply do whatever it is they need (often without thinking), and you don’t keep score of who did what or who’s due for sacrifice. In a platonic relationship, both partners simply know their motto is “Whatever you need, I am here for you.” And they mean it. 

Narcissism may often present itself in romantic relationships because these relationships are fragile and open to combustible interactions, while platonic relationships are based on care, making narcissism less likely. 

Difference #5. Less Complications and More Time to Grow

In a platonic relationship, both partners support each other, leaving room to grow together. There is no fear of being “dumped for a younger or sexier model,” so partners can really be open and share their needs and thoughts

It’s liberating and way more supportive to know you have a safe space with your partner to share, that your sharing won’t be labeled as being needy or rejected for not being sexy. Real care and compassion (not stereotypical passion and desire) will carry you further than in a romantic relationship. 

Romantic relationships are loaded with some type of apprehension. You fear really telling your partner what you think or feel (especially when it’s about them), causing a lingering unease.

The main silencer is that you know there are other fish in the sea, so you fear your partner will decide to throw you back and go for another catch. 

Difference #6. You Can Talk About Others

It’s a rare gift that you can openly talk about others and your relationships with others with your platonic love partner.  

I wouldn’t advise you to talk to your partner about other romantic partners as this would place unreasonable pressure on your platonic relationship (and yeah, you can have both relationships at the same time, but it’s hard to manage and keep both partners happy). You can discuss your friendships and other relationships with your partner when your love is platonic. 

In contrast, when you’re in a romantic relationship, you may feel guarded and be unable to share your deeper thoughts with your romantic partner. There’s a fear of losing out or not being accepted by your romantic partner. 

Difference #7. Conflict vs Compromise

Conflict is common in any relationship, whether platonic, romantic, or friendly. Platonic relationships embrace conflict as a way to work toward growth and development. However, romantic relationships will rather end with one partner compromising instead of the other partner working through it.  

In romantic love, the partners are afraid of losing out because of conflict, so they opt for the path of least resistance, but this can breed contempt. Platonic relationships strive to work through conflict, using it as a means for learning new information about each other, with neither party held to blame. 

Romantic partners may hear you, but a platonic partner will really listen to you. When you share burdens, you open communication and defang conflict, fostering a sharing mindset. 

Final Thoughts on Platonic Relationship VS Romantic Relationship

Personally speaking, my platonic relationships are the best that I’ve had in my life. Despite moving on because I did want a romantic relationship too, I am still long-time friends with my platonic partners.

Sadly, I can’t say the same for past lovers, where ending the romance led to ending the relationship (often badly). You can always say “it was amicable”… but I’ve yet to find the couple that really means it. At least not, whole-heartedly.

In the end, a platonic relationship can lead to romance… in fact, it often does. Think of it as the “Holy Grail” of dating, because you start off as friends and really got to know each other before deciding if you are right for one another romantically.

Friends first will ensure you’re really there for each other in good times and bad. If you think you may have this person in your life, be sure to check out this article platonic relationships and how to make them work.

What is Platonic love and what types of love are there?

Platonic love is an emotional and spiritual relationship between people who love each other, but without sexual attraction or romantic relationships; this feeling may be based on common interests, a similar worldview, or a spiritual connection.

Most often this is the name of a strong friendship between the sexes (between a woman and a man), but it is also very common and occurs within the same sex (between two men or two women).

This type of love brings two people together and does not look at gender, age, race, or even sexual orientation. Platonic feelings are considered more sublime, because between a couple there is only spiritual attraction and no sexual attraction.

The idea of ​​platonic love originated in ancient Greek philosophy. It was first mentioned by the great thinker Plato in his dialogue "Feast" (written in 385 BC), but he did not use the term itself. This phrase was first used in the 15th century by the Italian philosopher and scientist Marsilio Ficino - amor platonicus (lat. "Platonic love").

Examples of platonic love from literature:

  • Don Quixote and Sancho Panza in Miguel de Cervantes' novel "The Cunning Hidalgo Don Quixote of La Mancha";
  • Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson in the stories of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

When not referring to platonic love or relationships, the adjective " platonic " can be used figuratively. It is talking about something that is not really feasible, is possible only as an impracticable idea or has no practical purpose (for example: Platonic interest).

What kinds of love are there?

Types of Plato's love

Then in his work "Feast" the great writer and thinker Plato described 3 forms of love:

  1. Eros - intimate love,
  2. Philia - platonic love,
  3. Agape - altruism, love for humanity or for God.

Some scholars combine these three types of Plato's love into two:

  1. Romantic love, which has romantic intentions, sexual attraction, physical intimacy.
  2. Platonic love that has neither sexual attraction nor physical intimacy.

Modern types of love

However, other representatives of the academic community have developed the Platonic concept of types of love. List of those who are known and considered important:

  1. Agape - altruism, charity, unconditional and disinterested love for people and God.
  2. Epithumia - craving or lust.
  3. Eros - erotic, emotional and romantic love, amorousness and fidelity are present.
  4. Ludus - playful love and affection, a game of flirting and seduction.
  5. Mania is a manic obsession.
  6. Philautia - self-esteem, pride; or in an unhealthy manifestation: vanity, pride.
  7. Philia - deep friendships or affectionate love.
  8. Platonic love - inspiring soul and mind, without sexual relations.
  9. Pragma - mature love, comfortable or pragmatic, not always romantic.
  10. Storge - love within the family, the love of parents for a child or a sense of belonging.

What is carnal love?

Carnal love is the opposite of platonic love. The word "carnal" is obsolete and comes from the word "flesh"; modern synonyms: sensual, physical, physiological. For example:

"But you keep talking about carnal love. Don't you allow love based on the unity of ideals, on spiritual affinity?"
"Kreutzer Sonata", Leo Tolstoy

Find out more about Love and Ancient Philosophy.

Update date 18/01/2021.



Other meanings and concepts that may interest you

  • Love
  • Metaphysics
  • Philosophy
  • Dichotomy
  • Folklore
  • Metaphor
  • Misogyny
  • archetype
  • Paronym
  • Rococo

Learn What It Is: Learn the meanings, concepts and definitions. 2018 - 2022 Tests

Contents

One of the varieties of spiritual attachment known since ancient times is platonic relationships.

Having been transformed over many centuries, in the modern world such interrelationship of heterosexual people of different sexes gradually took shape in a rare friendship between a man and a woman, which allows partners to provide moral, moral and material support to each other, not supported by mutual (or one-sided) sexual attraction.

Founder of the theory of platonic relationships

Platonic relationships are a spiritual attachment of 2 (or more) people, based on the desire to know the inner world of another person similar to their own without the presence of intersexual attraction in the relationship.

The founder of the theory of Platonic love, the ancient Greek philosopher Plato for the first time designated the term "Platonic love" in his work "Feast" substantiating it by the fact that it is common for people endowed with reason to have:

  • sexual needs and procreation.
  • Spiritual relationship , which is the most noble interaction of intelligent people who strive with all their heart to be close to the object of adoration.

According to Plato, spiritual relationships are possible only between mature people who know how to control their feelings and emotions and are the main way to know the true happiness of human communication. It is the presence of souls that can recognize insipid things in a person that distinguishes people from representatives of the animal world, who seek only bodily contacts.

Platonic love according to Plato is an immaculate relationship that can give a person true happiness. Such love is the “highest good” given to people.

Among the examples of the highest, ideal love, the philosopher singled out:

  • love for the Motherland;
  • parental love;
  • honoring father and mother by children.

F. Petrarch's deification of Laura is a classic example of a Platonic relationship. This woman was not only a muse for the poet, but also an inaccessible deity, an earthly angel, whom he did not get tired of admiring from a distance, but with whom he did not dare to speak in reality.

What does it mean, causes and signs

Platonic relationship is a strong relationship between people based on spiritual intimacy, not supported by the desire to make sexual contact.

The reasons that awaken the emergence of platonic love in the modern world of universal sexual emancipation include:

  • Religious beliefs. The Islamic religion clearly prohibits any sexual contact before marriage. Platonic love in this case is often a way of manifesting a nascent feeling for a future life partner or dreams of an unattainable, but very attractive person.
  • Celibate. Voluntary refusal of any physical contact forces people to limit themselves to spiritual interaction.
  • Health problems. Platonic relationships can be observed in couples where one or both partners, for physiological reasons, cannot make full sexual contact, but are very close to each other spiritually. Love here is built on the psychological, moral and spiritual support that spouses invariably provide for each other.
  • Love for an idol. Most common in adolescence, worship of an idealized person, in the role of a famous movie star, singer, teacher, older person.
  • Fear of ruining previously established relationships. One of the most common reasons that provoke people to hide their romantic feelings from the object of desire is the fear of spoiling long-formed friendships with an ill-timed confession or an unsuccessful romance.

In today's world, platonic relationships are considered synonymous with friendships between same-sex or opposite-sex individuals.

For the most part, platonic feelings appear between a heterosexual man and woman at the first stage of relationship development and, subsequently, developing, they are reborn into a deep love affection, which includes, among other things, sexual contacts.

Lack of sexual attraction or the impossibility of its manifestation, for any reason, leads to the formation and strengthening of inter-gender platonic friendship based on mutual support that partners give to each other, commonality of views and interests.

The benefits and duration of a platonic relationship

A platonic relationship is a common, long-term emotional attachment between 2 people based on common interests and a desire to communicate.

The advantages of this type of interaction include:

  • A strong foundation that makes it impossible to lose a partner instantly, which can often be observed when a love affair occurs.
  • Opportunity to get to know a particular person or features of building a way of thinking of the opposite sex for a more successful, in the future, building a romantic relationship with another person who has a similar way of thinking.
  • Lack of jealousy and doubts about the partner's feelings.
  • The constant presence of a loved one who is able to give the necessary advice and support.

Platonic relationships in their purest form are considered to be a fairly strong and long-term structure that exists by mutual desire and is based on the common interests of partners. The lifetime of such an interaction depends only on the desire of the people who formed it.

Such relationships are much stronger than friendship, love, affection. In some cases, platonic love may not be mutual, expressed unilaterally, which is absolutely uncharacteristic of friendship and other forms of romantic relationships.

There are many cases when platonic feelings were harbingers of true mutual love and were present at the initial, most unstable, stage of intersexual relationships with heterosexual partners.

A man and a woman in a platonic relationship, with mutual sympathy at 90% of cases move their relationship to a new stage. Mutual attraction to each other, not encountering serious obstacles in its path, over time develops into a deeper romantic attachment, bringing recent friends into a common bed.

According to statistics, long-term spiritual attachment between healthy, heterosexual representatives of different sexes can last for quite a long time only if:

  • if the partners are connected by love, family relationships with another person;
  • are under the control of religious, cultural beliefs, or their life is subject to strict moral standards accepted in society;
  • are not sexually attracted to each other.

Platonic love between a man and a woman

Platonic relationships are, for the most part, a transitional period for heterosexual partners, helping a man and a woman to get to know each other better during communication and in the presence of mutual sympathy, transforming into a strong love attachment.

Platonic relationships can remain unchanged for a long time only if they represent one of the options for interaction that does not imply further development of spiritual communication. In the modern world, such varieties of platonic relationships include:

Unrequited love

A common form of love in adolescence, which is characterized by the presence of 2 sides:

  • active - showing her feelings through any actions;
  • passive - having no mutual interest in the active side, or not knowing about its existence at all.

Teenagers aged 12 to 18 who are in love with famous movie stars, singers, teachers, young people who do not reciprocate often act as an active structure. This form is characterized by the idealization of the idol, with the attribution of qualities unusual for him and the creation of a kind of "altar of worship".

Unrequitedly in love teenagers join fan clubs, try to attend events and concerts of their ideal in the hope of catching the eye of the adored person, constantly guarding the object of love.

Such passion exists for no more than 2-4 years and disappears after the appearance of a more suitable, accessible partner in the child's life.

At an older age, unrequited love is much less common and, as a rule, is observed in people who have problems with interpersonal communication and many different complexes that allow them to consider themselves unworthy of an object of adoration. Such feelings can last for a long time and lead to serious psychological trauma that requires the help of a specialist.

Relations at a distance

Forced love relationships in which people in love for some reason exist separately from each other. During the period of meetings and when obstacles are removed, such relationships instantly develop into a full-fledged love affair, with an obligatory sexual component.

The development of modern technologies allows such relationships to exist for a long time, allowing lovers to communicate via Skype, Viber, through social networks between meetings.

Relationships between older people

Often observed in older couples who previously had regular sexual intercourse, but were forced to stop due to health problems.

Spiritual unity among such spouses is considered ideal, because it is built on:

  • community of interests;
  • mutual psychological, moral support;
  • the presence of common children, grandchildren;
  • a well-formed life;
  • the need to resolve issues related to the disposal of jointly acquired property.

Platonic relationships can also arise between single elderly people of different sexes. With age, the desire for physical intimacy fades into the background, giving priority to spiritual communication and commonality of views and interests.

Spiritual intimacy

A typical type of mutual communication for deeply religious people. Voluntary rejection of physiological contacts makes the study of the soul of a loved one paramount. Such partners are characterized by the presence of the same worldview, commonality of views and interests.

In the absence of a religious basis, this type of interaction can occur between like-minded men and women in the form of friendship.

Platonic relationships between members of the same sex represent the owl classic version of a strong, centuries-old friendship. Women, with the help of spiritual closeness, seek to satisfy their desire to communicate and discuss pressing problems, and men show respect for each other, realizing the detail in male participation and support

How to maintain a platonic relationship

A platonic relationship can last quite a long time, because unlike romantic feelings, it does not tend to cause jealousy or doubt in a partner.

The key to the longevity of spiritual interaction based on a common worldview and interests between representatives of different sexes is the observance of certain rules of behavior: Heterosexual individuals tend to show interest in members of the opposite sex, especially if they are connected by a commonality of views and interests.

  • Entering into a platonic relationship, you should set clear boundaries. A man and a woman must necessarily agree that they are only friends for each other and any sexual connotation in their relationship (even if there is a limited opportunity) is prohibited.
  • Partners should trust each other as much as possible. The basis of a strong spiritual connection lies in the confidence in your decision. A man and a woman need to completely isolate themselves from public opinion, which asserts the impossibility of the existence of true friendship between individuals of opposite sexes and always support a partner.
  • Focus on the positives of existing relationships. Platonic feelings, unlike romantic relationships, are protected from various kinds of doubts about fidelity and prejudice, which allows them to be much more durable than any other attachment.
  • Friends of the same sex should explain to their loved ones (especially to “second halves”) the nature of the relationship that has arisen. Timely conversation with your spouse will help to avoid any distrust and jealousy. It will not be superfluous to also set boundaries and not provoke family members with meetings at odd times, strange sleepovers and frequent meetings alone.
  • You can't give in to dreams. Despite the fact that, according to statistics, spiritual intimacy is most often a transitional moment that portends a long-term, romantic relationship, men, and especially women, should be clearly aware that a friend of the opposite sex should remain only a friend, despite the fact that, suppressed for a long time, sexual desire can cause unnecessary thoughts about translating the Platonic connection into a new dimension.
  • Dangers of a platonic relationship between a man and a woman:

    • Despite the limits set, one-sided romantic attachment cannot be prevented in most cases. In the event of falling in love on the part of one of the partners, a spiritual connection may degenerate into love affection (if the second partner agrees) or the occurrence of mental pain (in case of refusal). In any case, the platonic relationship in its former form will cease to exist, and it will not be possible to revive friendship.
    • If it is impossible to degenerate spiritual attachment into a romantic relationship (due to the busyness of the partner) to heterosexual friends, one should not discuss love experiences or matrimonial plans, limiting themselves to communication on topics not related to love relationships.

    Relationship between a man and a woman

    Several tests can be used to determine the nature of the relationship between a man and a woman.

    One of the most popular is the ancient list of questions that allows you to characterize the relationship depending on the answers received. According to this study, there are 7 different types of interaction, each of which has certain characteristics.

    When answering the question, you need to put a “+” sign if you agree with the statement and a “-” sign if you don’t:

    • Parting with a partner will be a real tragedy for me.
    • Relationships are based on strong friendship.
    • In a relationship, the main thing is to maintain your independence.
    • Strong relationships are built only between compatible people.
    • Sex is the key to long-term relationships.
    • Spouses are primarily the parents of their children.
    • Love is built on physical attraction.
    • Any serious relationship is an unnecessary responsibility.
    • If you love a person, you must forgive betrayals and patiently wait for a partner, because any distance is not an obstacle to real feelings.
    • My other half is as dear to me as my brothers and sisters.
    • You have to fight for your love.
    • For the sake of a loved one, you can sacrifice your interests, property and life.
    • Divorce is an extreme measure for which one should prepare well, and if necessary, postpone it until a more suitable time (transition to another job, reaching the age of majority by children).
    • The best spouses grow out of friends.
    • True love must be allowed to ripen.
    • Love experiences are irresistible from real feelings.
    • For my partner, I am just a convenient option, he does not appreciate and does not love me.
    • In relationships, you should always be prudent and look at things soberly.
    • Love is a lottery. Everyone wants to hit the jackpot here by spending as little money as possible.
    • Choosing a partner should be done consciously.
    • Lovers must yield and listen to their partner.
    • Reason always obeys love.
    Love can start from a platonic relationship.

    Test results:

    The nature of the relationship is determined depending on the number of positive answers received to specific questions.

    Result Meaning
    1,5,7 Rapturous love (EROS). A spontaneous feeling, manifested by an acute craving for a loved one and the desire to always be there. It has a lightning-fast character. Most common in adolescence. Lovers strive for a complete merging of souls, remember the date and the feeling that gripped them at the first kiss, meeting, sex. The separation is very hard to bear, causing severe mental trauma.
    6,10,19 Love resembling friendship (PHILIS). Platonic relationship, manifested in the form of strong affection. It often occurs between children and parents.
    2,9,11 Tender affection (STORGE). A slowly emerging feeling based on trust, manifested in a strong emotional attachment to a partner. Very strong, not afraid to face the test of distance or betrayal. Sexual contacts with such love are very simple. It often occurs between spouses.
    3,8,18 The game of love (LUDUS). It is characterized by a lack of depth and a desire to dissolve in a partner. It is typical for people looking for short-term pleasures.
    12.15.20 Sacrifice in the name of love (AGAPE). It is manifested by the presence of a feeling of adoration, the desire to dissolve in a partner, the rejection of one's desires. It often appears during adolescence.
    4,13,17 Love of convenience (PRAGMA). All feelings and romantic impulses are under clear control of the mind.
    11,16,21 Manic attachment (MANIA). A dangerous feeling, adjacent to suspicion, distrust of a partner. It occurs in people with low self-esteem.

    Relationship character test: Friendship between partners or love .

    What do you do if your partner annoys you with his antics
    1. I instantly explode.
    2. I try to keep my emotions under control.
    3. I tolerate, I understand very well that I myself am imperfect
    In the presence of a loved one, you can flirt with others, because:
    1. Take revenge for his flirting.
    2. Trying to arouse jealousy.
    3. Love when people of the opposite sex admire you
    Changes have taken place in you since the beginning of the relationship
    1. I don't notice.
    2. I become more boring.
    3. Others notice that I have become more interesting
    When a loved one admires you:
    1. Take it for granted
    2. Accept praise with dignity and thank you.
    3. You try to show how much you enjoy the attention of your loved one.
    What will you do when you find out that your partner is cheating on you
    1. I'll make a scandal.
    2. I am confident in my partner, this will not happen.
    3. I will endure, and then I will forgive
    Do you give your spouse surprises for no reason
    1. Your best gift is me.
    2. Why not, but not often.
    3. Love to pamper partner
    You easily determine the current mood of the partner
    1. I am not interested in
    2. Yes, always
    3. very rarely
    You well remember what food your partner loves
    1. This is not important
    2. I can’t remember
    3. Yes, and I like to please

    test results:

    "1" There are feelings between partners, but this is a friendship built on a good attitude and the predominance of self-love.

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