Phobia of commitment name

Gamophobia (Fear of Commitment): Symptoms, Causes, More

A phobia is an excessive fear of something that actually presents little danger, but nonetheless makes you anxious. In the case of gamophobia, it’s a fear of commitment or marriage.

We’re not talking about passing nervousness that could happen to anyone considering a long-term commitment. We’re talking about the kind of fear that alters your life or leads to anxiety or panic attacks.

If just thinking about commitment or marriage gives you the flop sweats, makes your heart pound, or leaves you lightheaded, you might have gamophobia. And it can rob you of otherwise fulfilling relationships.

Unlike many researched phobias, gamophobia is an extremely under-researched area. Let’s take a closer look at gamophobia and how you can overcome it.

How common is a fear of commitment?

Statistics on individual phobias are hard to come by. It’s estimated that 12.5 percent of adults in the United States experience a specific phobia at some point. Some of the more common ones include the fear of flying, fear of spiders, and fear of needles.

How many people have fear of commitment is difficult to say. Not everyone seeks help or gets a diagnosis. Without professional counseling, it’s not easy to figure out if you’re dealing with gamophobia or something else, such as:

fear of abandonment
fear of intimacy
fear of trusting others

Even though statistics are lacking, it’s safe to say that you’re not alone.

Specific phobias like gamophobia can develop early in life. It may be due to a mixture of things rather than a single cause.

It could be a learned response from observing parents or other close relatives.

Fear of commitment can arise out of a particular trauma, such as witnessing your parents’ difficult relationship or divorce. You may have grown up with the impression that relationship or marital conflicts can’t be worked out and you don’t want to walk in your parents’ footsteps.

Gamophobia could arise from the ashes of a previous relationship that didn’t work out or fear of “missing out” should you commit to one person.

You could even have a genetic predisposition to anxiety.

Being a little cautious before committing is a good thing and not indicative of a phobia. A true phobia shows itself in bigger ways, such as:

The thought of commitment fills you with dread.
You’ve organized your life around this fear.
You’ve backtracked on good relationships out of a need to “escape.”
You feel anxious or depressed about relationships.

Just thinking about commitment can lead to physical symptoms such as:

rapid heartbeat, heart palpitations
sweating
shortness of breath
chest pain
lightheadedness
nausea
flushing

You probably realize that your fear is excessive and can stop you from getting what you want. A true phobia significantly impacts your school, work, or personal life for 6 months or more.

Once you acknowledge the fear and realize that it’s within your power to change, you’ve taken the first step.

If you’re in a relationship, be totally honest with that person to avoid leading them on. Let them know that this is about you and your history, and you’re learning how to deal with it.

Explore the reasons behind your fear. Are past events sabotaging your present happiness?

Think about what you want and need in a relationship. You might come to realize that long-term commitment isn’t your cup of tea after all. Or you might discover that despite the fear, that’s exactly what you want.

That realization may be all you need to start overcoming your fear.

You don’t have to get married or have a committed relationship. You may have perfectly valid reasons for not committing. That’s a personal choice and you get to make it. You can be happy on your own and you can still have meaningful relationships.

On the other hand, any unreasonable fear can change the course of your life. When fear of commitment rules, freedom of choice is lost, and that can hold you back in a major way.

It may also impact your health. Research from 2016 shows that having a phobia is associated with higher probability of physical diseases.

If you aren’t able to work through it on your own, you may benefit from seeing a mental health professional. It’s especially important to seek medical help if you also have panic attacks, anxiety, or depression.

Once you recognize your phobia, you can start to address it. It’s possible that through deep introspection and a willingness to change, you can overcome it on your own.

But getting over a phobia can be difficult. If you’re struggling, there are several forms of therapy that may help you along.

Behavioral therapy

In behavioral therapy, the theory is that behaviors are learned and therefore can be changed. You’ll identify specific self-destructive behaviors and practice strategies to change them.

Cognitive behavioral therapy

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) helps you see how thoughts affect behaviors. Your therapist will most likely present a structured plan with a set number of sessions at the outset. As you progress, you’ll learn how to change your thinking and behavior patterns.

Psychodynamic therapy

In talk therapy and other psychodynamic therapies, also known as psychotherapy, you’re free to express your innermost feelings without being judged. This can help you come to terms with your phobia and how it came to be. Talk therapy can include individual, couples, or group sessions.

While CBT and behavioral therapies are gold standards for most phobias, gamophobia may be a response to challenges in our personal relationships or the relationships around us. Psychodynamic therapies are found to be particularly helpful for this.

Medication

Medication isn’t usually necessary in the treatment of phobias. If you’re dealing with a co-existing condition, a doctor may consider prescribing:

antidepressants
drugs to treat anxiety disorder
drugs to treat panic attack disorder

If your partner has gamophobia, it doesn’t mean their feelings for you aren’t genuine. It’s a phobia, so it says nothing about you. That’s not to say that your feelings don’t matter, because they do.

Does your partner have no intention of changing? Consider what you can live with. If you simply must have that commitment, you have a decision to make. If you don’t feel the need to lock in a relationship, then it’s all good.

Does your partner want to change? You can help. Let them talk about their feelings without fear of judgement. Allow them time and space to take small steps. Support them in seeking therapy and offer to go with them if they want you to.

Open communication is the only way to proceed in the best interest of both parties.

Gamophobia is a fear of commitment or marriage. Well beyond pre-wedding jitters, it’s an intense fear that can cause you to lose valuable relationships.

Psychotherapy, particularly CBT, is associated with positive outcomes in treating specific phobias. If you have gamophobia and want to change, it’s entirely possible. If you need help, look for a therapist experienced in treating specific phobias.

Gamophobia (Fear of Commitment): Symptoms, Causes, More

A phobia is an excessive fear of something that actually presents little danger, but nonetheless makes you anxious. In the case of gamophobia, it’s a fear of commitment or marriage.

Unlike many researched phobias, gamophobia is an extremely under-researched area. Let’s take a closer look at gamophobia and how you can overcome it.

How common is a fear of commitment?

fear of abandonment
fear of intimacy
fear of trusting others

Even though statistics are lacking, it’s safe to say that you’re not alone.

Specific phobias like gamophobia can develop early in life. It may be due to a mixture of things rather than a single cause.

It could be a learned response from observing parents or other close relatives.

Gamophobia could arise from the ashes of a previous relationship that didn’t work out or fear of “missing out” should you commit to one person.

You could even have a genetic predisposition to anxiety.

Being a little cautious before committing is a good thing and not indicative of a phobia. A true phobia shows itself in bigger ways, such as:

The thought of commitment fills you with dread.
You’ve organized your life around this fear.
You’ve backtracked on good relationships out of a need to “escape.”
You feel anxious or depressed about relationships.

Just thinking about commitment can lead to physical symptoms such as:

rapid heartbeat, heart palpitations
sweating
shortness of breath
chest pain
lightheadedness
nausea
flushing

You probably realize that your fear is excessive and can stop you from getting what you want. A true phobia significantly impacts your school, work, or personal life for 6 months or more.

Once you acknowledge the fear and realize that it’s within your power to change, you’ve taken the first step.

If you’re in a relationship, be totally honest with that person to avoid leading them on. Let them know that this is about you and your history, and you’re learning how to deal with it.

Explore the reasons behind your fear. Are past events sabotaging your present happiness?

That realization may be all you need to start overcoming your fear.

On the other hand, any unreasonable fear can change the course of your life. When fear of commitment rules, freedom of choice is lost, and that can hold you back in a major way.

It may also impact your health. Research from 2016 shows that having a phobia is associated with higher probability of physical diseases.

Once you recognize your phobia, you can start to address it. It’s possible that through deep introspection and a willingness to change, you can overcome it on your own.

But getting over a phobia can be difficult. If you’re struggling, there are several forms of therapy that may help you along.

Behavioral therapy

In behavioral therapy, the theory is that behaviors are learned and therefore can be changed. You’ll identify specific self-destructive behaviors and practice strategies to change them.

Cognitive behavioral therapy

Psychodynamic therapy

Medication

Medication isn’t usually necessary in the treatment of phobias. If you’re dealing with a co-existing condition, a doctor may consider prescribing:

antidepressants
drugs to treat anxiety disorder
drugs to treat panic attack disorder

Open communication is the only way to proceed in the best interest of both parties.

Gamophobia is a fear of commitment or marriage. Well beyond pre-wedding jitters, it’s an intense fear that can cause you to lose valuable relationships.

Favorite phobia of a bachelor

Why there is a fear of intimacy

In a huge variety of male characters, mental aspirations and types of treatment of a woman, women themselves with enviable constancy choose men for their partners who, in fact, are absolutely not ready for family, yes and partnerships in general.

Psychologists call this phenomenon intimophobia, not at all implying by it the fear of physical intimacy and sexual contacts, as psychiatrists originally meant. It is the fear of really close emotional relationships.

I'm sure you've also met a charismatic man in your environment with money and a position in society, who subtly feels what a woman needs, who knows how to charm, speak her language, look after her, be irresistible in bed and be successful in business, but completely elusive and absolutely unsuitable for marriage. To the great dismay of women who fall in love with such a man, promiscuity is his preferred form of sexual interaction, which essentially symbolizes not only freedom of choice and freedom from all obligations, but also the ability to feel psychologically autonomous, and therefore not experience feelings that cause pain. Where does this initial fear of mental pain come from?

People who do not spend time on intimacy quite often manage to reveal their talent, become great or simply successful in their field. Perhaps that is why a huge number of intimophobes are among artists, artists and politicians. I will say a banality: behind every great man is his mother. For an intimophobic man - to the same, if not to a greater extent. Moreover, impulsive, demanding and inconsistent. Scenarios may vary, but the result can be expected even in kindergarten. As a rule, from infancy, such a boy is surrounded by all-consuming maternal love, but this love is more like suffocation in hugs and a contrast shower. Mom, for no reason visible to the child, can both fall in love and reject.

This situation is more common in families where the mother brings up her son alone, or where the role of the father is absolutely insignificant for various reasons: the father works a lot, is rarely at home, or is deprived of the right to an advisory vote due to the wife's authoritarianism. But it doesn't change the essence. The mother keeps telling her son: you are the only one, the only man in the house, hope, support, my protector, you must learn, be, become ... Moreover, often the mother gives the boy the feeling that if he does not cope, she will leave him, refuse to be with it, and therefore, increases conditioned dependence and fear of loss of attachment. The child understands: if I don’t cope, there will be no mother, and mother needs to be protected. Therefore, he tries his best to comply. And it’s good if the mother was satisfied with the result at the first stage. But more often this does not happen, and everything goes to the extreme - the mother is never satisfied with the results of her son, she stimulates and stimulates the boy to be better and better, reaching the extreme point in her perfectionism. A serious protest can become such a point when a boy, and sometimes already a man, finds strength in himself and separates, leaves such a mother. He leaves just to go somewhere - into the unknown, into any relationship, into the army, into the war, just to relax, because the pressure of his mother seems to him worse than any male battles. And this is, in fact, the best thing that can happen to him.

If a boy lacks mental strength, he dutifully "corresponds" to his mother's needs, tries his best, suffers, suffers, but goes to the goal. The goal seems to have been achieved, but the uterine fear of the need to meet the unrealistically high demands of a woman remains. And it doesn't matter who this woman will be. For a man, it becomes necessary to avoid any relationship where he falls into dependence, especially emotional. Such an experience is a great heartache. And there is no experience of overcoming this pain. There is an unconscious need to be the best, to always go towards the goal, but there is no understanding why he needs this goal. Like in fairy tales: after the wedding there is no plot.

If the boy has not learned love other than the love of his son for his mother, which means that he has no experience of relationships with a woman "not a mother", and at the moment when they appear, he experiences an unconscious feeling that incest is taking place. As a result, it is sexual relationships that are the first to deteriorate, and a man is looking for a new woman, and younger, younger! Arising in the area of the unconscious, such fears lead to a conscious desire to stay away from anyone who can be recognized as a relative. Therefore, such an individual rushes from woman to woman, at the risk of being branded as a womanizer and womanizer, but the essence of throwing is an escape from his mother, from whom it is not so easy to escape, because she seems to him everywhere.

Yes, thanks to his mother, such a man knows the needs of women well: he knows how to be courteous, pleasant in communication, and look good. After all, mom demanded the same: don’t be rude to mom, say “thank you”, don’t be silent, comb your hair! Women find him understanding, sincere, sometimes even generous. Generous, however, for the time being - generosity, alas, eventually turns into an extreme degree of stinginess, if it is already about partnerships, and therefore dependent relationships. That is, a temporary partner, a mistress, a man is ready to buy a car, but his wife will have to report on all, even minor expenses. Addiction and hypercontrol are twin brothers!

Men often come up with rational excuses for such behavior. The range of reasonable explanations is wide: from "all women are fools" (with ornate variations "I have not met one that could ... was ... fit ...", "I am a confirmed bachelor") to "everyone is so beautiful that I cannot choose one" .

But, in fact, both mean: I have not met a woman who could replace my mother, in unity with the opposite message: God save me from falling under maternal influence once again, but under any influence! Even when relationships develop in a generally positive way, intimophobes (both men and women) subconsciously look for the rake that they can and must step on, looking even where everything is completely cloudless. You will not envy a partner in this situation: just at the peak of the relationship, an intimophobe can suddenly disappear, show aggression, start behaving repulsively and frighteningly. Thus, he breaks up with a partner, making himself unworthy of a relationship, justifying all maternal promises.

Women also have plenty of reasons to avoid close relationships and acquire intimophobia as a defense: unhappy love, betrayal in previous relationships, disappointments after the first marriage, material difficulties caused by men. It is much easier for a woman to find many excuses why not to live in a couple. But just women can get married almost automatically, pushed by social norms: a woman should be married, and let's wait and see how things go there. Plus, she has an advantage - she can always give birth to a child "for herself." Yes, more often than not, the mother's patterns of behavior will be imbibed by the baby, but who cares? Yet not alone! Judgments about men in such women always speak of their experience or the experience of their mothers, usually negative. Such women are often afraid to dissolve in a relationship, lose their "I", disappear as a person. And again, the key is fear, which justifies the formula: if something does not suit me in this relationship, I can always look for someone more interesting, sexier, richer, better.

By the way, intimophobia is not always hidden under the mask of intimophobia. Sometimes men and women, tired of the numerous questions of relatives, friends and acquaintances "why are you not married? / Not married?", put on a mask of rejection of close relationships, but in fact they simply do not yet see the utilitarian benefits of marriage for themselves. After all, there is a great variety of models of marriage, contrary to Tolstoy's assertions. And finding a person who will satisfy most requests on a reciprocal basis is quite realistic, which, in fact, explains the large number of non-traditional marriages in the philistine understanding, such as, for example, guest or same-sex marriages. After all, it is quite possible that the parental model proposed as a model can be so terrible and unacceptable that repeating it is rather a step into the abyss than to happiness.

Fear of commitment | BroDude.

No, man, you're not George Clooney, who doesn't want to find the right chick to make little clowns with. But no matter how cool this dude is, he really has one problem, the name of which is the fear of commitment.

Such dudes are called commitment phobia people. Of course, I am not a psychologist, perhaps this is not a phobia at all in its usual sense, but in any case, this fear grew on the fertile ground of complexes, infantilism and other garbage. You should become more mature, more courageous, do something else, but you hide behind a free disposition, dislike for women and the name of George Clooney. But you're not Clooney.

People with a fear of commitment do not know how to plan their lives. Instead, they go to whatever meetings they dug up on social media or in Afisha magazine. They never read the essence of the meeting, and then sit on it, stupid, endure until the end or leave at the very beginning. After they curse their boring and uninteresting life, starting all over again.

Those who are afraid of commitment find it difficult to stay at work because they cannot take responsibility for doing what is supposed to be done in a day. They can buy a membership to a fitness club for a year, and then worry that they cannot attend it for a long time, because they are scrapped.

Stylish excuses are in store for commitment phobes. This man, with a fear of commitment, can tell a girl with frightening ease that he will never marry her, because he despises marriage as a form of relationship, does not like children, and even hates them. This person can say that if he does not like something, he will easily get up and leave. And he will get up and leave, and then he will blame fate for giving him girls who are unworthy of him, who are not his destiny and all that. A person with a fear of commitment can also easily tell a girl that he does not love her and will never love her, because he is essentially unable to love (or will say some other pretentious shit), that they will live together for several years, and then they will run away, " but it will be some wonderful years!” The most unpleasant thing in this situation is that the girls will still remain, because they will think that he loves them deep down, otherwise he would not have lived with them. And those who have a fear of obligations, when they leave, they will say that everything suited the girl, because she accepted the terms of the game. In fact, such an alignment can only suit an inveterate masochist.

It is difficult for people with commitment phobia to change their status. Because they are afraid to open up to a new person and afraid to fall in love. They do not like that someone invades their personal space, starts to place their jars and bottles there. Even a small change leads commitment phobes to think that they are not made for this, that relationships are shit. Or, even more often, this girl is not made for them because she does not dance to their tune. But even if she seriously dances to their tune, she is unlikely to receive approval from them, because the presence of a woman in the common living space is still in some way a change.

But life changes, and when the environment of a dude with a phobia of commitment begins to rapidly start romances and get married, he falls into a panic. These people take a deep breath and convince themselves that this is not for them when their next acquaintance shares the good news that he will marry the most wonderful girl in the world.

Do not forget that girls can also be people with a fear of obligations. Especially for them and for those girls who read us, we will tell you how to live with a person with a fear of obligations.

1. Don't be fooled by her/his enthusiasm

This person can build castles in the air and promise you three boxes. He is satisfied with one / two meetings a week and good sex. But he will “call” you on them only at will. He can, of course, meet with you when you want to show that he is not completely a bastard, but this does not mean anything. You will literally feel with your skin that your relationship is going nowhere. At all. When things are going to start dating more often, or the person with the fear of commitment starts to feel like he or she likes you, he or she will run away as fast as he can. All this will be accompanied by beautiful and meaningless words. But he or she might just leave without explanation.

2. Try to get them to talk about their fears

Don't beat them with your questions, it will only get worse. Turn off the pressure and ask about previous relationships, it may even happen that you conquer this phobia.

3. Do not give them an ultimatum and do not bring down your love and obligations on them

Do not forcefully introduce them to your mother or relatives, do not confuse them with the phrases “I love you” or “Marry me!”. People with fear of phobias will be cornered and will act completely unpredictable.

4. Be patient and adapt

Learn to read the signs, learn to know when to call and when to leave. Give them time, but if 6 months have passed, and things are still there, then leave, just leave! These people do not seem to need your love, and you cannot help them in any way. There are enough people in this world who will not torment you with expectations.

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