Overcoming social shyness
Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness: 8 Tips to Start
Anxiety and fear in social situations can make daily life more difficult. But there are ways to manage that might be right for you.
Social anxiety and shyness aren’t exactly the same. Though there is overlap between the two, you can be shy (or get social anxiety symptoms from time to time) without experiencing social anxiety disorder.
Let’s take a look at these differences.
Social anxiety disorder involves a persistent fear of being watched and judged by others. This fear can affect work, school, and other day-to-day activities that involve being around others.
Shyness can also make you uncomfortable in social situations, but the difference is in the intensity and effects of your fear. People with social anxiety disorder may feel their anxiety is so strong that it’s beyond their control. It might also feel like anxiety takes over many parts of your life.
Social anxiety doesn’t affect everyone the same way either. Some people with social anxiety disorder experience anxiety only in certain social situations, and others might have anxiety that shows up only in performance-related settings, like public speaking.
It may feel as if your social anxiety or even shyness is out of your control, but it isn’t. There are ways to manage these feelings, however persistent they might seem.
Fermented foods and probiotics are known to bring many physical benefits, such as digestion and cardiac health. What you might not know, though, is that according to research, probiotics can also give you a mental health boost.
In one study, people who ate more fermented foods had fewer social anxiety symptoms. While more research is needed to solidify this link — and probiotics alone are unlikely to make social anxiety disappear completely — adding more probiotics into your diet could be a small yet effective way to help reduce some social anxiety.
While adding probiotics to your diet might help lessen some social anxiety, a couple of things could also make it worse — including that morning cup of coffee or energy drink.
Older research shows caffeine can increase feelings of panic and anxiety in people who already experience anxiety.
And in an animal study, consuming more caffeine in adolescence was linked to higher levels of anxiety in adulthood.
Like caffeine, alcohol may not be the best option if you’re looking to reduce feelings of social anxiety. Some people use alcohol as a social lubricant, and it can work in the short term. But if using alcohol to soothe social anxiety becomes a habit, it can make you feel more anxious in regular settings over time.
Some research also suggests that alcohol could increase anxiety in shy people the day after drinking it. Even moderate amounts can affect your mood and anxiety level, so it’s a good idea to be mindful about how often you use it to take the edge off anxiety in social settings.
Talking one-on-one with a therapist may cause feelings of discomfort if you already experience social anxiety. But some alternative therapeutic methods could involve less of this one-on-one time.
For example, virtual reality cognitive behavioral therapy (VR-CBT) allows you to face your fears — like striking up a conversation with a stranger or giving a speech — in a virtual landscape. This form of therapy could allow you to practice communicating in a lower-pressure setting.
While VR-CBT shows promise for helping people manage social anxiety, it might not be available in your area. If you prefer less talk and more tech, biofeedback could be another, more accessible option.
You might also find a therapy that takes you out of your comfort zone — like group therapy — is your preferred approach to address anxiety, and research backs this up. One study on cognitive behavioral group therapy for social anxiety found it helped people reduce symptoms in the long term.
The physical act of smiling could impact mood and shyness.
In short, being happy can make us smile. But smiling can also make us happy. In one study, smiling in scary situations helped shy children reduce social anxiety.
And it’s not just smiling that might help alter your mood. You can practice:
- good posture
- loosening the muscles in your face
- relaxing your eyebrows
On the other hand, research has also found that people with social anxiety might already be used to smiling more than people without it. In another study, people with social anxiety smiled more often to mirror the person they were talking with.
If you feel exhausted by the idea of smiling any more than you already do, that’s OK, too.
You may be thinking: “But that’s the problem. I can’t!” The trick is in setting manageable goals for yourself.
For example, if you’re new to running, you probably wouldn’t begin by signing up for a marathon. Instead, you might start by running only a minute at a time and walking for a while, too. The same can apply when dealing with shyness and social anxiety.
Instead of taking on more than you can handle, you might begin by setting a goal you know you can complete.
And that will look different for everyone.
For one person, a good first goal might be texting a friend to say “hi.” For another, it might look like taking a walk around the park when more people are outside.
To identify that kind of a goal, the key is to be honest with yourself about what steps you can take. If you tend to put a lot of pressure on yourself, you might need to scale back the goal to make it more manageable. Or maybe you need to push a bit beyond your comfort zone.
When it comes to identifying what’s possible given your own social anxiety or shyness, you’re the expert.
Partaking in activities you like can be a great way to manage social anxiety. By focusing your attention on something like yoga, drawing, or gardening, you can give yourself a chance to have fun without worrying about judgment from other people.
It’s important to give your mind a break from all that sometimes. Some research even notes that pursuing an activity just because it’s fun is connected to better mental health and good outcomes in therapy.
And none of what you do has to be for show or put on display. You can blog, paint, build birdhouses, or go for a bike ride all for yourself. It’s all about your own enjoyment.
Like one-on-one therapy, reaching out to a friend might be something that feels a little threatening if you’re shy or experiencing social anxiety disorder. But if there’s someone in your life you trust, initiating conversations with them can help them understand you better.
There’s no need to be ashamed or misunderstood for your social anxiety. By practicing expressing your feelings to a friend, you can learn to open up and feel more comfortable making conversation in general.
It may seem counterintuitive, but trying to wish away the things that cause your anxiety isn’t usually the best answer. Instead, consider putting your worries on the spot.
When you notice yourself beginning to feel anxious, you may want to identify exactly what’s making you feel this way. By really focusing your attention inward and having an honest discussion with yourself about what your fears are, you may be in a better position to understand your shyness or social anxiety.
If you feel like you want to take more steps in learning or treating shyness and social anxiety, more resources are available for you. You can check out the National Social Anxiety Center for more info and support or Psych Central’s own resource on treating social anxiety.
There are many ways to help reduce feelings of social anxiety and live life more at ease. Finding the right solutions for you can be a process, but there’s no doubt that it’s a process worthwhile.
Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness: 8 Tips to Start
Anxiety and fear in social situations can make daily life more difficult. But there are ways to manage that might be right for you.
Social anxiety and shyness aren’t exactly the same. Though there is overlap between the two, you can be shy (or get social anxiety symptoms from time to time) without experiencing social anxiety disorder.
Let’s take a look at these differences.
Social anxiety disorder involves a persistent fear of being watched and judged by others.
This fear can affect work, school, and other day-to-day activities that involve being around others.
Shyness can also make you uncomfortable in social situations, but the difference is in the intensity and effects of your fear. People with social anxiety disorder may feel their anxiety is so strong that it’s beyond their control. It might also feel like anxiety takes over many parts of your life.
Social anxiety doesn’t affect everyone the same way either. Some people with social anxiety disorder experience anxiety only in certain social situations, and others might have anxiety that shows up only in performance-related settings, like public speaking.
It may feel as if your social anxiety or even shyness is out of your control, but it isn’t. There are ways to manage these feelings, however persistent they might seem.
Fermented foods and probiotics are known to bring many physical benefits, such as digestion and cardiac health. What you might not know, though, is that according to research, probiotics can also give you a mental health boost.
In one study, people who ate more fermented foods had fewer social anxiety symptoms. While more research is needed to solidify this link — and probiotics alone are unlikely to make social anxiety disappear completely — adding more probiotics into your diet could be a small yet effective way to help reduce some social anxiety.
While adding probiotics to your diet might help lessen some social anxiety, a couple of things could also make it worse — including that morning cup of coffee or energy drink. Older research shows caffeine can increase feelings of panic and anxiety in people who already experience anxiety.
And in an animal study, consuming more caffeine in adolescence was linked to higher levels of anxiety in adulthood.
Like caffeine, alcohol may not be the best option if you’re looking to reduce feelings of social anxiety. Some people use alcohol as a social lubricant, and it can work in the short term. But if using alcohol to soothe social anxiety becomes a habit, it can make you feel more anxious in regular settings over time.
Some research also suggests that alcohol could increase anxiety in shy people the day after drinking it. Even moderate amounts can affect your mood and anxiety level, so it’s a good idea to be mindful about how often you use it to take the edge off anxiety in social settings.
Talking one-on-one with a therapist may cause feelings of discomfort if you already experience social anxiety. But some alternative therapeutic methods could involve less of this one-on-one time.
For example, virtual reality cognitive behavioral therapy (VR-CBT) allows you to face your fears — like striking up a conversation with a stranger or giving a speech — in a virtual landscape. This form of therapy could allow you to practice communicating in a lower-pressure setting.
While VR-CBT shows promise for helping people manage social anxiety, it might not be available in your area. If you prefer less talk and more tech, biofeedback could be another, more accessible option.
You might also find a therapy that takes you out of your comfort zone — like group therapy — is your preferred approach to address anxiety, and research backs this up. One study on cognitive behavioral group therapy for social anxiety found it helped people reduce symptoms in the long term.
The physical act of smiling could impact mood and shyness.
In short, being happy can make us smile. But smiling can also make us happy. In one study, smiling in scary situations helped shy children reduce social anxiety.
And it’s not just smiling that might help alter your mood. You can practice:
- good posture
- loosening the muscles in your face
- relaxing your eyebrows
On the other hand, research has also found that people with social anxiety might already be used to smiling more than people without it. In another study, people with social anxiety smiled more often to mirror the person they were talking with.
If you feel exhausted by the idea of smiling any more than you already do, that’s OK, too.
You may be thinking: “But that’s the problem. I can’t!” The trick is in setting manageable goals for yourself.
For example, if you’re new to running, you probably wouldn’t begin by signing up for a marathon. Instead, you might start by running only a minute at a time and walking for a while, too. The same can apply when dealing with shyness and social anxiety.
Instead of taking on more than you can handle, you might begin by setting a goal you know you can complete. And that will look different for everyone.
For one person, a good first goal might be texting a friend to say “hi.” For another, it might look like taking a walk around the park when more people are outside.
To identify that kind of a goal, the key is to be honest with yourself about what steps you can take. If you tend to put a lot of pressure on yourself, you might need to scale back the goal to make it more manageable. Or maybe you need to push a bit beyond your comfort zone.
When it comes to identifying what’s possible given your own social anxiety or shyness, you’re the expert.
Partaking in activities you like can be a great way to manage social anxiety. By focusing your attention on something like yoga, drawing, or gardening, you can give yourself a chance to have fun without worrying about judgment from other people.
It’s important to give your mind a break from all that sometimes. Some research even notes that pursuing an activity just because it’s fun is connected to better mental health and good outcomes in therapy.
And none of what you do has to be for show or put on display. You can blog, paint, build birdhouses, or go for a bike ride all for yourself. It’s all about your own enjoyment.
Like one-on-one therapy, reaching out to a friend might be something that feels a little threatening if you’re shy or experiencing social anxiety disorder. But if there’s someone in your life you trust, initiating conversations with them can help them understand you better.
There’s no need to be ashamed or misunderstood for your social anxiety. By practicing expressing your feelings to a friend, you can learn to open up and feel more comfortable making conversation in general.
It may seem counterintuitive, but trying to wish away the things that cause your anxiety isn’t usually the best answer. Instead, consider putting your worries on the spot.
When you notice yourself beginning to feel anxious, you may want to identify exactly what’s making you feel this way. By really focusing your attention inward and having an honest discussion with yourself about what your fears are, you may be in a better position to understand your shyness or social anxiety.
If you feel like you want to take more steps in learning or treating shyness and social anxiety, more resources are available for you. You can check out the National Social Anxiety Center for more info and support or Psych Central’s own resource on treating social anxiety.
There are many ways to help reduce feelings of social anxiety and live life more at ease. Finding the right solutions for you can be a process, but there’s no doubt that it’s a process worthwhile.
Butler J. Overcoming social anxiety and shyness
- pdf format
- size 10.
39 MB
- added June 25, 2016
Constable & Robinson Ltd, 2007. - 413 p.
Gillian Butler - Clinical Psychologist, National Service Health Care UK" and "Oxford Center for Cognitive Therapy". In 2002, members of the "British Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapy" she has been recognized as one of the most influential women cognitive psychotherapists in the UK. Within 10 years she was part of a research team at Oxford, developing cognitive-behavioral methods for the treatment of anxiety disorders, including social anxiety. nine0011
This course:
Indispensable for those who suffer from shyness and social phobia.
Has already become a classic guide and helped thousands of people after first edition in 1999.
Recognized by psychotherapists and recommended by the national UK health service.
Contains numerous exercises and worksheets.
“Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness” is a book for working on this common problem on your own, explaining why it appears and offering practical methods for solving it. Don't let shyness ruin your life. Everyone at times feels embarrassed, judged, criticized, but it becomes a problem when it destroys your confidence and prevents you from doing what you want to do. AT In the most extreme cases, shyness can significantly limit you, but it is not difficult to overcome with the help of cognitive behavioral therapy. Using real examples, Professor Gillian Butler offers a practical, easy-to- application of a course for self-study, which can become invaluable to those suffering from all forms of social anxiety. In addition, it is an excellent tool for psychologists and psychotherapists. The book contains a complete step-by-step course for self-help, providing all the necessary skills to overcome social phobia and shyness. nine0015 The course has earned the respect of both professionals and patients for its practicality and friendly approach.
The book explains what social anxiety is, the role of this fear, its origin, and what actually happens when shows social anxiety. The following is a complete a practical guide to overcoming these feelings, changing thinking patterns, reduced self-concentration of attention and increased confidence. Some additional topics are also covered. such as explaining the consequences of bullying in a team, training relaxation. nine0011
Course content:
What is social anxiety?
Symptoms and effects of social anxiety
Various types of social anxiety and its degree prevalence
About shyness
Is all social anxiety in our heads? Central role thinking in social anxiety
Where does social anxiety come from? What causes it?
Explaining social anxiety: understanding what is happening, when a person experiences social anxiety nine0011
Starting Points
Decreasing excessive focus on ourselves and how we look in the eyes of others
Change in thought patterns
Change in behavior
Increasing confidence
Basic beliefs and assumptions
Bringing everything together
Becoming assertive
Consequences of bullying in a team
Relaxation
Coping with social anxiety and excessive shyness
Photo: ambermb / pixabay. com
https://racurs.ua/2154-kak-spravitsya-s-socialnoy-trevojnostu-i-izlishney-zastenchivostu.html
Dec 25, 2018, 21:46
999
Giving a presentation, interviewing for a job, meeting new people can all cause stress and excitement. Anxiety in various social situations prevent some people from enjoying life. If you suffer from excessive shyness or a diagnosed anxiety disorder you deserve to feel that the joy that others experience during interpersonal communication. Let's look at the most common problems associated with social phobia and shyness, as well as how to solve them.
What is social anxiety?
Social anxiety disorder is a constant and very intense fear of various social situations. People who suffer from social anxiety often avoid going to parties or perform any specific job duties for fear of being judged or humiliated by others. Social anxiety can also lead to physically noticeable symptoms, for example, redness, sweating, dizziness and stomach cramps. Even the thought of a stressful social situation makes a person with a similar problem feel sick. nine0011
The severity of social phobia varies greatly in each individual case. Someone can almost always feel anxious in the presence of other people, someone is nervous only during public speeches or phone calls. Doctors usually diagnose social anxiety only when the condition causes a person to experience severe distress or significant impact on his life.
How is social anxiety different from shyness? nine0061
Although some features of the two states overlap, they are not the same. Social anxiety is a much more serious and destructive problem than ordinary shyness. If a person during a conversation prefers to sit quietly on the sidelines rather than take an active part in the conversation, then you can call him shy. Such people like to observe the situation and think it over before taking any action. Sometimes they need to first assess the person and the circumstances in order to say “Hello!”. nine0011
The difference between social phobia and shyness is expressed in how uncomfortable a person feels at the same time. Although both of these groups show approximately the same behavior, the shy a person will feel less depressed in a particular social situation. An introvert is happy to give the interlocutor the opportunity to talk throughout the conversation. Person with social anxiety, she is afraid of interrupting someone.
Sometimes it can be difficult to tell the difference between shyness and an anxiety disorder. Therefore, if it seems to you that your problems in communicating with others go beyond the boundaries of the usual shyness, be sure to consult a specialist. Your doctor can help you determine exactly what you're experiencing and recommend next steps. nine0011
How to deal with social anxiety?
Although social phobia and shyness are different from each other, both of these problems are completely solvable. Uncontrolled anxiety can interfere with a career, building relationships, and achieving ambitious goals. therefore, positive changes in this area are vital. Here are five things you can start working on overcoming social anxiety to improve your social life.
1. Pay attention to your thoughts . Social anxiety often stems from negative thought patterns that cause fear and encourage the formation of bad habits. When you are nervous, pay attention to what you are thinking about at such moments. Do you judge your behavior? Or do you make assumptions about what other people think of you? Watch your thoughts until you identify the thought patterns that affect you the most.
2. Challenge your expectations . Try to turn negative thought patterns into neutral ones. Avoid the irrational belief that others will hate you. Replace such expectations with more rational thoughts, for example, some people will like you, others will not, which is absolutely normal. By challenging your thinking, you can start perceive social situations differently. nine0011
3. Make an appointment with a specialist . Comprehensive Cognitive Behavioral Therapy will help you deal with social anxiety through specific lessons and practices. Professional help you work on your anxiety behavior in a safe environment.
4. Take small steps . Some argue that it is necessary to face your fears, but this advice is usually useless. When faced with something new, it's better move forward gradually. Start with a little fear - try saying "Hello" to someone. Then move on to more serious actions, such as sharing your opinion with someone. Any an important goal is just a set of actions that do not have to be completed in one step. Give yourself time for this. nine0011
5. Try again and again . When it comes to overcoming anxiety or shyness, regular practice is key to success. Practice participating in social situations until it comes naturally to you.
