Emptiness in life
SAMHSA’s National Helpline | SAMHSA
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SAMHSA’s National Helpline is a free, confidential, 24/7, 365-day-a-year treatment referral and information service (in English and Spanish) for individuals and families facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
Also visit the online treatment locator.
SAMHSA’s National Helpline, 1-800-662-HELP (4357) (also known as the Treatment Referral Routing Service), or TTY: 1-800-487-4889 is a confidential, free, 24-hour-a-day, 365-day-a-year, information service, in English and Spanish, for individuals and family members facing mental and/or substance use disorders.
This service provides referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations.
Also visit the online treatment locator, or send your zip code via text message: 435748 (HELP4U) to find help near you. Read more about the HELP4U text messaging service.
The service is open 24/7, 365 days a year.
English and Spanish are available if you select the option to speak with a national representative. Currently, the 435748 (HELP4U) text messaging service is only available in English.
In 2020, the Helpline received 833,598 calls. This is a 27 percent increase from 2019, when the Helpline received a total of 656,953 calls for the year.
The referral service is free of charge. If you have no insurance or are underinsured, we will refer you to your state office, which is responsible for state-funded treatment programs. In addition, we can often refer you to facilities that charge on a sliding fee scale or accept Medicare or Medicaid. If you have health insurance, you are encouraged to contact your insurer for a list of participating health care providers and facilities.
The service is confidential. We will not ask you for any personal information. We may ask for your zip code or other pertinent geographic information in order to track calls being routed to other offices or to accurately identify the local resources appropriate to your needs.
No, we do not provide counseling. Trained information specialists answer calls, transfer callers to state services or other appropriate intake centers in their states, and connect them with local assistance and support.
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Suggested Resources
What Is Substance Abuse Treatment? A Booklet for Families
Created for family members of people with alcohol abuse or drug abuse problems. Answers questions about substance abuse, its symptoms, different types of treatment, and recovery.Addresses concerns of children of parents with substance use/abuse problems.
It's Not Your Fault (NACoA) (PDF | 12 KB)
Assures teens with parents who abuse alcohol or drugs that, "It's not your fault!" and that they are not alone. Encourages teens to seek emotional support from other adults, school counselors, and youth support groups such as Alateen, and provides a resource list.After an Attempt: A Guide for Taking Care of Your Family Member After Treatment in the Emergency Department
Aids family members in coping with the aftermath of a relative's suicide attempt. Describes the emergency department treatment process, lists questions to ask about follow-up treatment, and describes how to reduce risk and ensure safety at home.Family Therapy Can Help: For People in Recovery From Mental Illness or Addiction
Explores the role of family therapy in recovery from mental illness or substance abuse. Explains how family therapy sessions are run and who conducts them, describes a typical session, and provides information on its effectiveness in recovery.For additional resources, please visit the SAMHSA Store.
Last Updated: 08/30/2022
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You go to work, study, make plans, everything suits you and suddenly everything loses its meaning. What was useful yesterday is useless today. Where does the emptiness inside come from and how not to fight it? How to feel the joy of life during such a spiritual "abyss"? What needs to be done to combat the inner cold and emptiness? If you find a “desert” inside you, it’s time to plant a “flowering garden”. Read to the end and there will no longer be a feeling of emptiness inside you. nine0003
Causes of feelings of emptiness.
![](/800/600/http/2.bp.blogspot.com/-gKkAeTcBIg8/W7Zx_hQA5fI/AAAAAAAAE24/H0p_55YwTqgIW8fzSM3SYAmxjhmW03RywCLcBGAs/w1200-h630-p-k-no-nu/Imprint%2Bstrangeness.jpg)
When you realize “I can no longer fight indifference to everything”, then it's time to give yourself a moral shake-up. It is important to understand why life has ceased to boil inside you, and you resemble a squeezed lemon. Psychological decline cannot arise just like that - it has a rationale. Why has ordinary life turned into a kind of gray mass, where there is neither joy nor a sense of freedom? Life turns into a black and white movie when a person is morally exhausted. Routine, eternal fuss gradually takes away energy. nine0003
If the first year of office work with a strict boss was bearable, then after three years you don't want to just get out of bed and even think about going to work. The presence of stress is another factor that can drive a person into a corner, take away any desire to act. Fear of drastic changes, loss of something, critical situations for which we are not ready - this inspires a feeling of loneliness and devastation.
The emptiness inside is often the result of shocks. How can you think positively when your friend has betrayed you or, conversely, you let him down? When you spent the whole night creating a project to attract investment in your business, and your competitor bribed investors and won. Shock is a great stress that knocks a person off the usual path. nine0003
Take a depression test
When important goals are replaced by unplanned situations, the psyche can not stand it. Usually, after such a shake-up, a person says “I can’t take it anymore” and he has a frightening feeling of emptiness in his soul. The acute period has passed, but the consequences of it leave a detrimental imprint. Here there is a difficulty to return to the usual rhythm of life and again want to act for new results. If you lose what you have been saving for so long, what you valued, your hands drop, and silence sets in inside. nine0003
There is an emptiness inside, but what to do next? Under the influence of indifference, melancholy, apathy comes depression. Under its influence, a person acquires the status of "hopelessness" and a complete lack of initiative to do anything. Therefore, as soon as emptiness has entered the soul, it must be expelled with all efforts. Otherwise, a person ceases to be a person, and his life becomes like a mess. In order not to completely alienate relatives, friends, and the prospect of being happy in such a state, you need to distinguish between true reasons and false ones. Often, emptiness is a simulated state in which we lure ourselves into, due to such reasons:
- Lack of attention or lack of privacy. "I'm so lonely/lonely, no one loves me." You need to go to a meeting to communicate with interesting people and not become isolated in yourself.
- The whole day at work is completely exhausting, and then all that remains is to lie down on the sofa and watch TV. The work requires a responsible approach, the fulfillment of duties that sometimes go against the grain of the employee. It is important to be ready to contribute or think about finding a more interesting job.
We ourselves create the framework in which we experience oppression. nine0022
- A long wait for success gradually takes away energy. After a while, any desire to achieve goals disappears. When you do not feel the result, the effect of your actions, you gradually lose interest. You need to reconsider your views on the venture or pay attention to another type of activity.
- "I can no longer live in poverty, I don't want to be with these people, I deserve better." Lack of benefits, dissatisfaction with communication makes every day gray, and a person a pessimist. Just what have you done to live in prosperity and be surrounded by the right people? It is important to take steps to get out of the social bottom. nine0022
Take the test: optimist or pessimist
Symptoms of emptiness inside.
- Feeling of inferiority. Complexes about appearance, success, social status - this makes you not so complete in the eyes of others. You feel worthless, lacking opportunities to attract attention.
- You set outrageous goals. The search for ideals collapses in the collapse of your plans when you encounter difficulties.
- Indifference to others and great laziness. So I don’t want to make efforts on myself to get on my feet. This is especially expressed when you are unemployed for a long time, you do not set goals, you are underestimated in society. nine0022
- Fear of creating relationships. A phobia to approach a nice person and talk to him, although you have liked him for a long time. I really want happiness, tenderness, but you feel that you will not be able to take a decisive step. You are left alone with your fears and prejudices.
- The emptiness inside arises from the understanding of meaninglessness. You go to work to allow yourself to eat, to live, it drags on for years, the days seem gray, and you are indifferent. Circumstances, routine make a person a hostage. nine0022
- Thoughts of suicide appear when you realize your helplessness. A serious illness, the loss of a valuable person, the loss of values - great shocks take away common sense and instill chronic mental pain.
- People around you constantly condemn, society presses, does not accept you in your true form. A person feels his hopelessness, because he does not fit into any framework, and his attempts are bombarded by a flurry of negativity.
How to deal with this feeling?
Whatever the emptiness inside, and because of what it has arisen, there are always ways of rehabilitation. This state can easily go where it came from. Mistakenly, in the "broken" period, people turn to alcohol and other addictions. nine0003
The opinion that temporary pleasure will free one from the state of emptiness is extremely erroneous. This will not give confidence, but, on the contrary, will accustom you to other addictions. In order not to pull yourself out of a larger quagmire of problems later, it is better to heed the following recommendations:
1. Be able to trust.
When cats are fighting inside, and you feel helpless, you should turn to your closest ones. You should not withdraw into yourself, but it is better to ask for support from those who will always understand. It is important to find someone you really trust. Sincere relationships allow you to find understanding, consolation, love. nine0003
2. Distract yourself from the negative.
Everything has piled on and does not allow you to breathe freely? The moral void will gradually go away if you pause. Why not go to the mountains from this noisy metropolis, from this fuss? In nature, one feels inner harmony, which was lacking all this time. Inner loneliness often heals solitude surrounded by nature, peace of mind, a new environment. If you have been wanting to go on a trip for a long time, it's time to buy tickets and let the adventures come to life. For starters, it doesn’t hurt to at least go to the cinema, sing karaoke, make homemade sushi and invite guests! nine0003
3. Let feelings into your life.
I can no longer be alone with myself, I lack feelings. The mood to create a personal life is a natural desire. How long can you live in the cold, be detached, look back at the touching dates of friends and go on your way? If you saved yourself until better times, then it's probably time to become alive and draw attention to your side.
Take a mental test
4. Make an emotional shake-up. nine0057
When life is like a dry field full of weeds, it is important to renew it and sow a new crop. Feelings and emotional shaking go hand in hand. You can also shake frozen emotions. You cannot always be an idol, go headlong and not experience emotions. There is a mood to cry, sing your favorite songs with a guitar, go to a club for dancing, skydive or sign up for martial arts. This will turn on your real mode and let a new breath into your life.
5. Pay attention to development. nine0057
Emptiness can deprive a person of any opportunity to get on his feet in order to achieve success. You can't let circumstances take over. Do you dream of being an entrepreneur? It is important to communicate with successful people, go to personal growth trainings, read a lot of literature. Do you have a secret desire to try your hand at acting or perform on stage? Do not deny yourself the idea of expressing yourself.
Why not get a special education, watch educational videos, find useful contacts. It is important to work your way to a better future and assert yourself. Then emptiness will have no place in your life. nine0003
6. Find your own interests.
Work-home-work-bar-home-cafe and so on in a circle. Routine not only erases the boundaries of reality, it kills in you all interest in another kind of activity. On weekends, you can go out of town to pick mushrooms or visit the swimming pool. Hobbies dilute ordinary days that make you be responsible, do duties, maybe pretend. Hobbies are a way to regain freedom and a taste for creativity.
If the emptiness inside does not give you peace, apply these tips and you will feel the result. Do not be afraid to make mistakes, try to take control of the situation and start the path of your own liberation. It may be difficult at first, but soon this terrible feeling of devastation will leave you. Do not let every little thing negatively affect you, but strive to remain neutral - this will save your state and give you a sense of confidence. nine0003
Take a stress test
“It's like there's an emptiness inside” - what to do if the connection with oneself is broken
“I feel like there's an emptiness inside. It is even difficult for me to understand what I feel and what I want. Previously, I probably did not notice this - I just tried to fill the time as much as possible with communication, books, TV, so as not to be alone with myself. But now the emptiness is growing…”
Often a person lives with a feeling of inner emptiness from early childhood, but does not realize this, but only vaguely guesses that he is somehow different from others – more dependent on other people’s views, someone else’s assessment, someone else’s opinion. It is difficult for him to be alone, because immediately this painful feeling of emptiness arises. Therefore, such people are often very sociable, they can become the soul of the company. nine0003
However, here is a paradox: a person himself has to make considerable efforts to communicate, since any communication for him is inevitably associated with the fact that he will be evaluated, and without communication he remains as if in a vacuum - after all, he cannot emotionally saturate himself at all , it needs a constant external recharge. The same nourishment is required for his self-esteem, since it is very dependent on the assessment of others.
These people are often perfectionists - after all, if you do everything perfectly, you are more likely to receive praise. It is very important for them how they look, how stylish and expensive they are dressed. nine0003
The state of inner emptiness is most often formed in early childhood as a result of a lack of love and care of parents (hypoprotection) or excessive, excessive care (hyperprotection).
In the first case, the child's needs for love and closeness are ignored, and in order to survive, the child begins to repress the pain associated with being rejected, and along with the pain, represses other emotions and desires. After all, if desires are not fulfilled, and it hurts so much, it’s better not to want and not to feel at all. nine0003
In the second case (with overprotection), the parents “want” for the child all the time – a lot and often. They do not hear the true needs of the child and do not consider them. Such a child not only does not form normal boundaries, but the connection with himself, his emotions, desires is also broken, often there is a displacement of a part of the personality by parental introjects.
As a result, in both cases, in adulthood, a lack of connection with one’s inner Parent is acutely manifested, there may be a lack of basic trust in the world (during hypoprotection, parents broadcast to the child “there is no one to protect you,” you, because the world is very dangerous"). There is also an inability to recognize other people's emotions, as it is difficult to recognize one's own. Because of this, there are difficulties in communication, which is urgently needed because of the need to please and thereby nourish your self-esteem. nine0003
It happens that the feeling of inner emptiness first appears in adulthood, if a person experiences unbearable emotions for a long time, and in order to survive, unconsciously blocks his ability to feel.
Thus, inner emptiness is never completely empty.