Home » Misc » How to work on yourself mentally

How to work on yourself mentally


Rejuvenation 101 | University Health Service

Here are at least 101 ways to nurture yourself and reduce stress:

  • Laugh out loud
  • Listen to music
  • Fly a kite
  • Stretch
  • Be thankful
  • Read for fun
  • Daydream
  • Take a nap
  • Go rock climbing
  • Eat organic food
  • Canoe
  • Remember all the good things about yourself  
  • Create a collage representing "The Real Me"
  • Write a poem
  • Reward yourself
  • Reflect on your successes
  • Practice relaxation exercises
  • Learn yoga
  • Sing, draw, dance, sculpt - express yourself!
  • Forgive yourself or someone else
  • Walk in the Arboretum
  • Plan a vacation
  • Spin the Cube
  • Enjoy a long bubble bath
  • Get or give a massage
  • Go to a sporting event
  • Ice skate at Yost Ice Arena
  • See the dinosaur bones at the Natural History Museum
  • Climb the Bell Tower for a bird's eye view of Ann Arbor
  • Fingerpaint
  • Rake a pile of leaves and jump in
  • Play cards
  • Enjoy a free concert at the School of Music
  • Plant flowers
  • Take a deep breath
  • Work a crossword puzzle
  • Play hide-and-seek
  • Tell someone you appreciate them
  • Turn off your phone
  • Bake goodies and share them with friends
  • Volunteer to be a Big Brother or Sister
  • Believe in yourself
  • Try on clothes in a favorite store
  • Look for 4-leaf clovers
  • Tell yourself the loving words you want to hear
  • Watch cartoons
  • Reflect on your values
  • Go camping
  • Soak in a hot tub
  • Go bowling
  • Play with toys
  • Paint your face blue and yellow
  • Watch your favorite TV show
  • Keep a journal
  • Paint "The Rock"
  • Paint a house
  • Call a friend
  • People-watch
  • Go on a picnic
  • Become a volunteer
  • Have a pillow fight
  • Visit the Farmer's Market
  • Play in the snow
  • Blow bubbles
  • Walk a dog
  • Watch the marching band practice at Elbel Field
  • Dance in the rain
  • Visit a favorite place
  • Walk through the Law Quad
  • Visit a zoo or amusement park
  • Rollerblade
  • Pamper yourself
  • Develop a hobby
  • Rent a costume
  • Treat yourself to ice cream
  • Watch a sunset
  • Visit a sick friend
  • Join an IM team
  • Make a nutritious meal
  • Plan play time
  • Smile at a stranger
  • Listen to the birds
  • Browse through funny cards
  • Be optimistic
  • Go sledding
  • Visit an elderly person
  • Carve a pumpkin
  • Climb a tree
  • Stargaze
  • Play with a baby
  • Jump in a mud puddle
  • Play on a swingset
  • Sit outside on a sunny day
  • Create your own list of nurturing activities
  • Write a letter
  • Thank your mail carrier
  • Donate blood
  • Meditate
  • Go swimming
  • Test drive a car
  • Rearrange your room

Want more ideas?

See Fun and Cheap Things to Do in Ann Arbor.

Mindfulness | University Health Service

Wondering how you'll practice mindfulness, given concerns about COVID-19? U-M resources are now providing remote mindfulness practice, and recordings are also available!

Do you ever feel like your thoughts are racing a hundred miles a minute? Or that there’s just too much going on and you can’t find time to breathe? Feeling anxious and overwhelmed may even be affecting your schoolwork and grades. If this sounds familiar, mindfulness-based practices may be for you.

Mindfulness meditation is the practice of being present and deliberately aware of our inner thoughts, feelings and surroundings. It originates from Buddhism but is secular in nature. Mindfulness meditation has been shown to reduce stress, improve sleep, and improve cognitive functioning.

Variations of mindfulness meditation include:

  • Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) is an adaptation of the practice of mindfulness meditation to health contexts in order to alleviate stress, to foster awareness and relaxation, and to improve quality of life.
  • Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy classes combine traditional cognitive therapy techniques and mindfulness practices to address depression and anxiety. 

U-M and the greater Ann Arbor community provide great mindfulness resources, listed below.

U-M Resources

If you're interested in starting a sitting group yourself and would like to consult with others who have done this, please email Dmitry Berenson and Frank Anderson <[email protected]; [email protected]>

For all mindfulness opportunities on campus, see Well-being Events on the Happening@Michigan calendar. 

Wolverine Wellness at UHS provides:

  • Wellness Coaching is a free 1:1 conversation for undergrads and graduate students to learn more about how to incorporate mindful strategies into your life. 
  • Only have a minute? Incorporate mindfulness into your everyday routine using these One-Minute Stress Strategies.

North Campus Mindfulness (currently online) offers weekly guided meditation drop-in sessons on Mondays noon-12:30 PM. Free and open to all. Contact [email protected] to be added to the mailing list.

The School of Music, Theater, and Dance offers virtual sessions. See their calendar.
 

Ann Arbor Resources

Please check directly with these resources for any remote options.

Ann Arbor Open Meditation offers drop-in mindfulness meditation sessions, open to all. Sessions are appropriate for both beginning and experienced meditators.

Ann Arbor Center for Mindfulness offers classes in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction for a fee.

Transcendental Meditation offers a discount for full-time students to learn.

Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction classes are offered by the following practitioners:

Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy: Search the Community Providers Database using "mindfulness" as a search term.

The following Buddhist groups have classes and/or drop-in meditation sessions:

Still Mountain Meditation:  This new sangha offers weekly Sunday meditation sitting  at U-M Turner Senior Resource Center (2401 Plymouth Rd. Suite C) at 10 am, open to everyone.  It is walking distance from North Campus, so if any students who live there are looking for a place to sit on a regular basis, this is rather convenient.They also have Buddhist meditation classes for free, with donation. 

Michigan Buddhist provides locations of mindfulness sessions in Ann Arbor as well as resources on Buddhism.

Insight Meditation Ann Arbor offers meditation classes for all levels, donation recommended.

Deep Springs offers introductory meditation classes for a fee.

The Zen Buddhist Temple offers meditation courses at all levels for a fee.

Jewel Heart Tibetan Buddhist Learning Center offers mindfulness meditation classes. The free introductory class teaches mindfulness meditation from a secular perspective. All are welcome, and participation in the class does not assume or imply that one is Buddhist. It is led by two senior meditation instructors (John Madison, MA and Robin Olson, RN, MS, NP).

JissoJi Zen Ann Arbor is a Zen meditation group in the tradition of Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind. All are welcome, no experience necessary. 

Recordings:

You can try guided meditation with these recorded sessions. 

See also:

Resources for Stress and Mental Health

About the image on this page: We don't own the rights to this image, but it is available for free use, to our knowledge.

How to work on yourself - Psychologos

January 01, 2010, 10:26 am

Working on yourself can be difficult, but the results are impressive!

There are few people who BELIEVE that one can change oneself. Even fewer people are READY to change themselves. And how many people are CAPABLE of changing themselves on their own?

Ian Deutschman's article "Change or Die" (Fast Company magazine) described a study of patients who needed to change their habits in order to survive. Alas, only 10% of them were able to do this, the remaining 90% of them, after 12 months, returned to old habits that almost guaranteed a fatal outcome. Even in the face of a deadly threat, the vast majority of people cannot resist their old habits and make the right choice.

Notice that in that experiment we were talking about people with the ultimate motivation to change: they needed to save their lives. It seems that in calmer conditions, people change their habits even more lazily.

However, another group of patients showed different results in this study: in this group, 80% of the participants changed their habits. What made this group different? Only that they did not act alone, they had a support group. The patients who participated in the group met regularly, interacted and discussed their progress, difficulties and trials. Total: with a support group, the results were 7 times better.

It seems that there are literally only a handful of “selfmade” people who have made themselves on their own and alone. But why work alone? If you work with a group of like-minded people, your chances will increase at least 7 times. If you practice not just in a group, but under the guidance of a master, your performance will double.

Your solution?

Now more about all this.

Look for like-minded people . If you find out who and where is doing what interests you in the field of self-improvement, be sure to come and get to know these people. Pay more attention to the atmosphere, to the relationship between people: it is usually warm and attentive relationships between people that are the key to the fact that you will like it here and you will start working with the result.

IT IS BETTER TO EXERCISE IN A GROUP. LOOK FOR ASSOCIATES!

Enlist the support of your friends . It is very important that your friends support you. If not, you need to figure it out: either you are going the wrong way and not there, or you are not very on the way with these friends. Maybe your new friends will soon be those who together with you want to make themselves new

Quality training - great support . How and where to learn to work effectively on yourself? Psychological trainings will help in this best of all, the only condition is that it should be high-quality psychological training. Unfortunately, this is not always easy, today there are more base “psychological” trainings than worthy trainings that can help you. How to get a quality training, see here

Find your coach. Most often, the most important thing is to find YOUR mentor and coach: the one whose thoughts and whose style suits you the most, whom you want to be like and equal. The master will help you more accurately determine the direction, suggest effective techniques and methods, give high-quality feedback, help you not to forget your wonderful intentions, and create the necessary motivation.

WORK MORE EFFECTIVELY UNDER THE LEADING OF THE MASTER

Think about coaching. If you can afford it, we recommend finding your own coach. A coach is a psychologist who takes care of healthy and successful people. Unlike psychotherapists, a coach will not treat you, and unlike a consultant psychologist, a coach does not deal with one-time psychological consultations, but as a personal escort supports you on your development path. The coach, if he will teach you, will be to a small extent: the coach rather helps you figure out what you want and helps you achieve your goals in the best way for you.

COACHING IS WORTHY

Take the Distance! If you are interested in the most effective work on yourself, then today it is Distance - a coaching system for step-by-step personality development. The distance is your independent work on yourself, alternating with meetings in a group under the guidance of a leader. Distance is the most popular self-development system in Russia, developed by N.I. Kozlov. This is the development of communication skills, leadership, self-organization, building relationships in the family, the opportunity to improve health, teach yourself to go to bed on time, wean yourself from complaints, excuses and self-blame, teach yourself to hear, understand and feel people professionally. All this can be yours.

Today you can work on the Distance, including online, via the Internet, from any city and from any country in the world.

  • How to work on yourself
  • Author N.I. Kozlov
  • +
  • Work on oneself

Comments (24):

Guest, June 03, 2013, 08:26

A very useful article, much became clear and there was a desire to change and learn a lot. Thank you for such articles!

1

answer

Abbas, June 07, 2015 10:46 pm

Thank you for these articles, very helpful.

Guest, September 13, 2013, 09:20 am

Great! Thanks a lot! It was a pleasure to read and immediately and performed! It is very, very pleasant that the article is written simply, without the fashionable words "Vedas", "mantras", "practices", etc. Beautiful Russian language, beautiful article, useful - I am delighted with the unexpected simplicity and royalty at the same time! Good luck to everyone!

1

answer

Guest, October 28, 2020, 02:03

And what is the crime of the words "veda", "mantra", "practice"?

Guest, December 11, 2014, 8:06 PM

I am 61 years old, I really want to change and develop further. Advise our generation. Thank you.

1

reply

Guest, March 22, 2018, 12:39 pm

It is more difficult to change with age, but motivation works 100%. The main motivation is health, both physical and mental. Therefore, the most important thing is to accept yourself as you are, then love, because you are the only one in the world, and then develop acceptance and love for your loved ones, neighbors, distant ones, and for your homeland and country. Bathe yourself in love-respect.

1

reply

Guest, March 31, 2019, 11:43 am

"To the motherland, to the country"?! Hosssspadi, they can't calm down here either. Rod with propaganda. The beginning of the comment seems to be constructive, and then rolls into an empty one.

Alena, March 26, 2015 4:25 pm

Thank you for reminding me that the most important thing is not to stop, but to keep working on yourself. .. yourself!

Guest, December 01, 2016, 8:54 PM

Why PROGRAMM people so they can't change themselves? The person who reads this article clearly wants to change himself. But he has low self-esteem. Do you think a person with low self-esteem is able to identify himself to these units that CAN work on themselves on their own? ALL PEOPLE CAN CHANGE THEMSELVES INDEPENDENTLY.

3

reply

Guest, October 30, 2017, 08:35

I would like to agree with you, I don't like advertising, I don't like imposing anything, but you are not quite right. People can change themselves, but alone it is really more difficult. It is not necessary to go to coaching, but at least it is necessary and useful to look for support virtually, agree, otherwise you would not be here, right?

Guest, April 15, 2018, 6:07 pm

You are absolutely right about everything, and even more: a person will not change himself even in a group of people if there is no independent work. There is little specific information in the article: the return of the subjects, what kind of habits, the expected period of change, and much more.

Guest, February 20, 2021, 01:01 am

Whoever seeks will always find! Those who are strong will only be provoked by such statements of statistics! Little kids need to be taught. As I understand it, this article is written for those who are in fear, i.e. at the beginning of the way up. Thanks for the resource - there is something to realize)

1

reply

Guest, March 07, 2021, 10:11 am

I have been working on myself for many years and such articles arouse curiosity, but the article did not quite respond. Since I like to work more by myself with the help of books, useful articles - but without groups, etc..., on my own.

Guest, April 25, 2017, 13:51

Still, there was a man who would put the brains of many!!! :-) THANK YOU!!!

Guest, July 07, 2018, 07:12 PM

What should I do if, because of my character, I have a bad relationship with my parents and have no friends (relatives)?

2

replies

Guest, November 24, 2018, 07:45 PM

To begin with, do not blame everything on the character. It's too vague. Regarding relations with parents: "is it heredity? Or a lack of education?" And maybe you don’t need close friends at this stage, otherwise you would have them?

1

reply

Guest, January 25, 2019, 23:23

Please help me, why I don’t have a favorite thing, everything is indifferent or interesting, but - temporarily?

2

reply

Olga Kochetkova, consultant, January 26, 2019, 11:45

Guest, write to the free consultation [email protected], we will analyze your situation and will definitely help. Kochetkova Olga, APSP consultant http://www.aspsp.ru/

">http://www.aspsp.ru/">http://www.aspsp.ru/

Guest, May 09, 2021, 05:19

Because you are dying in Russia)

Guest, August 15, 2020, 10:14

Good question))

Guest, October 07, 2019, 07:54 PM

Life is a stone, you are a sculptor. Defeat is a reason to stand up Powerful boost of motivation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hIt_yLLVS48

Guest, September 23, 2021, 6:38 pm

What is the difference between a coach and a distance?

Svetlana, November 26, 2022, 6:13 pm

Thank you.

Related materials:

Jan 03, 2011 2017

10 reasons to send employees to the Distance

Every manager wants his employees to come to work cheerful and energetic.

0Read more

Jan 01 2016

Distance - a system of step-by-step personality development

Why "Distance"? Have you ever run a distance in a stadium? "Reade set Go!" — and you flew forward.

12Read more

13 Dec. 2019

How to leave your mark on life and not inherit

A person wants to leave a mark on life. This desire at the level of the instinct of self-preservation is very deeply rooted.

6Read more

Jan 01 2012

Distance online

Distance is the development of communication skills, leadership, self-organization, building relationships in the family, the opportunity to improve health.

7Read more

Oct 01 2022

Two main principles of development goals

Any skill can be assessed according to two criteria: 1. simple or complex, 2. Depends only on you or not only on you. Important: for training, choose only simple skills that depend only on you.

0Read more

Jul 07 2017

The main secret from successful people

Winners in life actively use words that arouse the energy of success in them!

13Read more

Jan 01 2006

How to work on Distance exercises

Load yourself intelligently. How many exercises will you take into your work this week? Usually distance athletes take two exercises for themselves: one shock (central) and one long, which can and should be prepared in the background. Sometimes it’s boring with one exercise and there are no conditions to perform it, and if you take on a lot at once, there is an overload and you don’t really do anything at all.

0Read more

Jan 01 1999

Personal development on the positive

To be more successful in your development, you need to pay attention first of all to your strengths.

12Read more

Jan 01 2013

Self-improvement

Self-improvement is the conscious development of worthy (necessary in life and ethical) skills and qualities.

1Read more

May 29, 2015

For those who plan to work on themselves on their own

It is not easy to move forward alone, and if possible, it is better to work on oneself with someone, it is good if in a group of like-minded people, and best of all under the guidance of a master. The master will help you more accurately determine the direction, suggest effective techniques and methods, give high-quality feedback, help you not to forget your wonderful intentions, and create the necessary motivation.

4Read more

Work on yourself: how to start changing

September 21, 2016 Motivation

We tell you how to find your mission and determine the direction of changes in life, as well as share methods by which you can achieve your goals.

In the comments to my first article, a question was asked about how to find your mission and determine the direction of change in life. In this article, I would like to answer this question and recommend some simple techniques that you can try out immediately after reading.

Why do we want change?

If it seems to you that you need to change something in this life, then it doesn't seem to you.

Rinat Valiullin

I have already written that the first step towards conscious changes in life is planning. However, I did not specify what exactly makes us start planning, look for sources of motivation and work with our resources.

Everything is very simple - it is a rejection of reality.

We start thinking about change when we have the desire to say, “There is something wrong with my life. I do not like it!". It happens when something makes us question our living standards.

I recently read the story of a girl who lost 20 kilograms. I'll give it as an example.

“I was on the subway when all the seats were full. My grandmother was sitting in front of me and for the first few minutes she carefully examined me. Then she got up and with the words: “Sit down, daughter, you are not supposed to stand with a baby” - she gave way to me. I, burning with shame and holding my "baby", sat down. It was at that moment that I realized that it couldn’t go on like this.”

The first thing you need to understand when embarking on a path of change is that the new standards you are aiming for do not match what you currently have. But after all, not everyone gets such an opportunity to experience a moment of utmost clarity, to see themselves from the outside and rethink their habits, like the aforementioned girl. So what to do?

1. What do I want to change?

It doesn't make much sense to climb a ladder if it's against the wrong wall.

Stephen Covey

This is the main question that concerns most people who have received a boost of motivation, but do not know where to direct their energy.

There are many ways to identify problem areas, but the easiest and most effective of them is a competent assessment. To do this, you need to consider separately the main areas of your life, which, as a rule, include:

  • love;
  • friendship;
  • welfare;
  • health;
  • work;
  • hobby.

This classification was proposed by Russian business coach Radislav Gandapas. You can use your division, revealing individual directions in more detail.

Now you need to evaluate each of them on a ten-point scale. So you decide which areas need your attention first. If you have opposite ratings (for example, 3 and 10), then you should think about redirecting your efforts to an area that needs it more.

If all the numbers are approximately the same, then start with health and love, since their development most of all trains the will and gives motivation for self-improvement.

2. How to force yourself to act?

In order to change something, a person needs to go through a catastrophe, poverty or the nearness of death.

Erich Maria Remarque

Once you have decided what to work on, you must bring yourself into a state of rejection of reality. Your desire to raise existing standards must overcome fear, which is guaranteed to make you want to leave things as they are. What is needed for this?

Take a piece of paper and write down the goal in the chosen area. For example: "I want to develop a strong relationship." Now divide the sheet into two columns with the following titles:

  1. Old Standards. What will happen in five years if I leave everything as it is?
  2. New standards. What will happen in five years if I start working on myself in this area?

Now try to be as honest as possible and write down the detailed answers to these questions. In our example of a strong relationship, old standards would include loneliness, lack of understanding, emotional instability, and so on. To the new ones - emotional support, a pleasant pastime, a happy marriage.

So what standards do you want to live by?

3. Live by the new standards. Today!

There is no balance in life. Every moment is either a movement towards perfection or degradation.

Andrew Matthews

Now you know which direction you need to go and what results await you at the end. At this stage, overwhelmed with emotions, we first begin to make plans to change the chosen area, but our enthusiasm quickly disappears.

To prove to yourself that your standards are indeed a thing of the past, start changing your chosen field today, right now. An excellent example of motivation for you is the picture below.

Pinterest.com

In order to see multiple changes in a year, it is enough to change only 1% today. Write to an old friend you haven't talked to for a long time, do exercises, find out about career opportunities at work.

Learn more