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Why am i over emotional


Why Am I So Emotional? 15 Reasons and What to do

Feeling heightened emotions or like you’re unable to control your emotions can come down to diet choices, genetics, or stress. It can also be due to an underlying health condition, such as a mood disorder or hormones.

Emotions are typical, but sometimes after an outburst or a crying session, you may be wondering why you’re feeling so emotional.

Here you can learn the most common reasons for heightened emotions. Feeling strong emotions isn’t always bad, but there are things you can do to cope better if you need to.

1. You’re human

You may be feeling emotional today. But guess what? You’re allowed to be.

We all feel happy, sad, low, or exhilarated. Emotions are a typical part of who we are as humans. Everyone processes events and emotions differently.

You may just feel things a bit more than others; or, you might just be feeling extra sensitive today.

If someone tells you to be less emotional, they’re probably basing it on societal standards. Don’t let them put you down. Emotions aren’t weak. They’re human.

What you can do

Sometimes, your heightened emotions may negatively affect your day-to-day life, for example, in your relationships with family, friends, or colleagues.

In this case, speaking with a therapist or counselor can help you understand the reason behind your feelings and learn strategies to lower the impact of these emotions on your life.

In addition, Mental Health America recommends trying the following tips at your leisure:

  • Pause your actions. It may help to count to 100 or say the alphabet backward.
  • Acknowledge what you’re feeling.
  • Think through your feeling and the reasons behind them.
  • Determine what may make you feel better. This could be getting something to eat, doing a fun activity, or simply allowing yourself to cry.

2. Genetics

Some people truly are more sensitive than others. While emotions are typical, being naturally more emotional may actually have a genetic component. Research indicates that about 20% to 60% of your temperament can be determined by genetics.

A personality trait called sensory processing sensitivity is a quality where someone processes the world more deeply. This includes the moods and feelings of others, as well as pain and loud noises.

In a 2021 study comparing the levels of sensitivity within sets of adolescent twins, researchers found that 47% of the differences in sensitivity between the twins were genetic. This finding supports the idea that emotional sensitivity can be inherited. In cases when siblings present with different temperaments, this difference can also partly be determined by DNA.

What you can do

Research also shows that if you have a family member with an affective disorder such as major depression, you may also have a higher risk of experiencing one.

There’s very little you can do about your genetics. After all, you are who you are. For this reason, getting therapy if you’re experiencing distressing emotions and working on self-acceptance can be enormously helpful.

Different ways to approach this include:

  • Mindfulness
  • Meditation or yoga
  • Psychotherapy
  • Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)
  • Emotional regulation therapy

Learn more on how to become the boss of your emotions.

3. Lack of sleep

Everyone knows what it’s like to wake up on the wrong side of the bed, so it’s not hard to imagine that a lack of sleep can affect your emotional well-being.

Sleep deprivation has several effects on your body, including:

  • trouble thinking and concentrating
  • higher risk of anxiety or depression
  • weakened immune system
  • poor balance and higher risk of accidents

It can affect your mood, too, especially the longer sleep deprivation occurs.

Studies have shown that sleep may be linked to emotional regulation, so getting less sleep may cause your emotions to seem out of whack.

Feeling more irritable or easier to anger is common when chronically sleep-deprived.

What you can do

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine and the Sleep Research Society recommend that adults sleep for at least 7 hours a night. Adolescents and children require 8 to 14 hours a night, depending on their age.

Strategies that can help you get better sleep include:

  • keeping a consistent bedtime
  • limiting bright lights in your bedroom
  • removing electronics from your bedroom
  • getting regular exercise
  • not smoking
  • limiting heavy meals, caffeine, or alcohol before bed

Learn more tips on how to sleep better.

4. Lack of exercise

We’ve all heard the physical health benefits of exercise, but exercise can also have a big effect on mood and emotions.

A 2018 study showed that regular physical exercise can contribute to better emotional regulation during stressful times.

Another 2017 study also showed that aerobic exercise had a therapeutic effect on regulating emotions.

What you can do

If you’re feeling extra emotional, jumping on a treadmill or going for a jog could help alleviate it.

According to the “Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans, 2nd edition,” you should aim to get at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic activity a week.

5. An unhealthy diet

Everything you eat affects your body, and a healthy diet can improve your overall well-being and mental health.

It may come down to your eating foods if you’re feeling emotional.

Research has found that eating an unhealthy diet can negatively influence your mood. In particular, foods that are high on the glycemic index, such as carbohydrates, may increase the incidence of depressive symptoms.

What you can do

This doesn’t mean that you necessarily need to completely avoid entire food groups. Eating a balanced diet is the best way to support both your physical and mental health.

In particular, you may wish to:

  • Make sure you’re consuming a nutrient-dense diet. Following a Mediterranean diet is one good way to make sure you’re getting the right amounts of all the nutrients you need.
  • Avoid processed, fatty, and fast foods.
  • Avoid skipping meals.
  • Make sure you’re not lacking vital vitamins and minerals. Consult with a doctor to see if you’d benefit from dietary supplements.
Pro tip: Mix things up

Not getting varied enough, nutrient-dense foods can mean you’re relying too heavily on one area of the food pyramid. This will likely lead to vitamin and nutrient deficiencies that can affect your mood and health.

6. Stress

Stress can take a toll on our bodies. If you’re feeling stressed or burnt out, you’re likely going to feel a little emotional.

There are many reasons you may experience stress. For example, when major life events or big changes occur, you’re inevitably going to feel the stress — no matter how well you plan for it.

A 2018 study also revealed that living with high stress levels can increase negative emotions such as anger or depression.

In particular, the study showed that the more stress you feel, the more you tend to ruminate on what’s making you stressed, which in turn increases your negative emotions.

What you can do

Coping with stress or anxiety involves many of the same strategies you’d use to cope with any challenging emotion.

Speaking with a counselor, a supportive family member or a friend can help.

In addition, leading a healthy lifestyle, taking time to do activities you enjoy, and limiting the use of substances and alcohol can help you manage day-to-day stress.

Learn more on how to cope with anxiety.

7. Grief

Grief is a varied, complicated, and messy thing. Grieving the loss of someone is one of the hardest things that we all universally go through. So if you’re not feeling yourself, or your emotions don’t feel the same, that’s typical.

Grief doesn’t have to just be about losing a loved one. You can grieve for your past self, a child you never had, or even a breakup.

We all handle loss differently and go through the stages of grief at different times, and we may not come out on the other side the same.

What you can do

Everybody grieves differently, and this is OK. Sometimes part of the grieving process can be simply allowing yourself to experience the emotions of grief to release them. You can also try some of these strategies to help you cope:

  • Talk about your grief with a trusted person or counselor.
  • Spend time with people who share your loss like your family or friends.
  • Take care of your health by trying to eat healthfully and get adequate sleep.
  • Stick to a consistent schedule.

Learn more about coping with grief.

8. Mental health

There are a number of mental health conditions that can impact mood. They include:

  • depression
  • bipolar disorder
  • anxiety
  • personality disorders
  • post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or complex PTSD

It’s important to note that there’s a difference between stress and anxiety. Stress usually responds to something specific in your life and will go away. Anxiety is when you experience prolonged worry for no obvious external reason. In cases when anxiety is chronic, it can become an anxiety disorder, which can significantly impact your emotional regulation.

Another condition that may affect mood is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). While difficulty focusing and trouble sitting still are the most well-known symptoms of ADHD, the disorder can also magnify your emotions. Research shows that emotional dysregulation is common among people living with ADHD, especially among children and adolescents.

What you can do

If you’re feeling emotional and believe that a mental health condition is a cause, it’s important to look for help. A doctor can evaluate you and provide you with an accurate diagnosis. This will help them determine the best treatment.

Depending on the type of condition, you may benefit from certain medications. There are numerous treatments that can help you manage your symptoms and feel a little more in control of your emotions.

In cases of trauma, it may be particularly difficult to heal on your own without any treatment.

Your treatment can include various types of therapy, such as CBT or psychotherapy for example. You may also benefit from taking medications such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs).

Help is out there

If you or someone you know is in crisis and considering suicide or self-harm, please seek support:

  • Call the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.
  • Text HOME to the Crisis Textline at 741741.
  • Not in the United States? Find a helpline in your country with Befrienders Worldwide.
  • Call 911 or your local emergency services number if you feel safe to do so.

If you’re calling on behalf of someone else, stay with them until help arrives. You may remove weapons or substances that can cause harm if you can do so safely.

If you are not in the same household, stay on the phone with them until help arrives.

9. Hormones

Hormones have both physical and psychological effects on the body. Any hormonal imbalance or extra sensitivity to hormonal changes can cause a change in your emotions.

Estrogen

In people assigned female at birth, hormonal fluctuations relating to the reproductive cycle can cause shifts in mood and difficulty controlling intense emotions in some people.

This is evident during menopause, for example, when the fluctuation in estrogen levels during menopause can lead to higher levels of negative emotions such as anger or sadness.

This can also occur before menstruation in what’s known as premenstrual syndrome (PMS) or premenstrual dysmorphic disorder, which is similar to PMS but includes more severe emotional symptoms.

There’s some evidence that using hormonal contraceptives can affect your emotions. Depression, anxiety, and anger were all found to be higher in people taking hormonal birth control.

Testosterone

The hormone testosterone also plays a role in male emotional regulation and can negatively affect mood.

Testosterone decreases with age, and medical conditions can cause a person to have low testosterone. These include genetic conditions such as hemochromatosis, an injury to the genitals, or cancer.

The female body also produces some testosterone. However, in some cases like polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), it produces too much, which disrupts typical hormone levels. This can also lead to shifts in mood.


Are sex and gender the same thing?

People often use the terms sex and gender interchangeably, but they have different meanings:

  • “Sex” refers to the physical characteristics that differentiate male, female, and intersex bodies.
  • “Gender” refers to a person’s identity and how they feel inside. Examples include man, woman, nonbinary, agender, bigender, genderfluid, pangender, and trans. A person’s gender identity may be different from the sex they were assigned at birth.
Other hormones

An imbalance of your thyroid hormones can affect your emotions, raising your risk of developing anxiety and depression.

In addition, certain stress hormones, such as oxytocin or cortisol, can affect mood, such as increased anger or emotional sensitivity. This is particularly true in cases of Cushing syndrome, which may be caused by a benign pituitary or adrenal tumor and can lead to excessive cortisol.

The adrenal gland’s imbalance of other hormones such as insulin may also affect your emotions and mood. This is known as adrenal insufficiency.

What you can do

The treatment for a problem with your hormones depends on the underlying cause and the type of hormone affected.

In many cases, a doctor will recommend a type of hormone therapy or hormone replacement. For some conditions, treatment with corticosteroids may be needed.

In case of a condition like Cushing, you may need surgery to remove the implicated gland. You may also need radiation or chemotherapy, even if the tumor is benign.

If you feel like your emotions are out of your control, or you believe it’s caused by an underlying health issue, see a healthcare professional. They can help you get to the root of the issue or refer you to a specialist.

Some strong or negative emotions are normal. However, if your feelings are causing you distress or having a negative impact on your life, you don’t have to simply accept them. Help is available.

Why Am I So Emotional? 11 Possible Reasons & What To Do

Why you have all these emotions.

Humans have emotions for a reason. Emotions are important, normal signals that help us identify internal or external needs.

"They motivate us to act," says Emma Carpenter, M.A., a marriage and family therapist at A Better Life Therapy. "In the days of hunters and gatherers, emotions were used as a way to protect ourselves from predators and the elements." Even though we're far from those hunter-gatherer days, emotions are still helpful because they tell us what's good for us and what's bad for us. 

Being emotional can be healthy.

When we think about emotions as signals, it becomes clear that there's no such thing as a "good" or "bad" emotion. All emotions are there to motivate us, give us information, and help us connect to one another and to ourselves, Carpenter says. Some emotions may be indicating pain and thus be harder to deal with, but having the emotion is what tells you that something needs to shift or change.

What can push emotions into unhealthy territory is a lack of understanding about how to cope with them. It's important to acknowledge and process your emotions so you can move past them rather than getting stuck, says psychotherapist Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW. For example, acting impulsively in response to an emotion can be unhealthy, whereas taking time to think about your emotions before responding is often more productive and can help you move past them more quickly in the long term.

In other words, having a lot of emotions is healthy and normal. Lacking healthy ways to cope with your emotions is what can get you into trouble. 

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Why you might be feeling emotional:

1.

Lack of sleep

Not getting enough sleep can make it tough to identify your emotions or make your way through them in a balanced way. Research has shown sleep deprivation can affect emotional processing1. In addition to irritability and mood disturbances, insomnia has been linked with rumination2, aka repetitive thought processes and excessive worrying.

To improve your sleep hygiene and create a calmer place to land, avoid drinking caffeine late in the day, begin a bedtime routine, and turn off your devices at least 30 minutes before bedtime.

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2. Poor diet

Nutritional psychiatry is booming for a reason: Research tells us food can impact your mental health4 and your body’s ability to process and balance our neurochemicals. That means what you eat affects how you feel, which can affect your overall well-being4. For example, a high-quality mediterranean diet has been associated with emotional wellness5, especially for women. In case it gives you any clues: that’s a diet of vegetables, fruits, whole grains, fish, and legumes.

If you're feeling emotionally out of control, consider what your diet has looked like for the past week. What can you change?

For starters, here are some superfoods for better mood and foods that help with anxiety. 

3. Lack of exercise

Regular exercise has been proven to help with emotional regulation6 by providing you with much-needed endorphins and a clearer mind. That exercise doesn't have to be vigorous, either—but moving your body will help you sleep better and feel better, physically and emotionally.

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4. Stress

If you're leading a generally stressful life, that stress can cause you to be more emotional7, irritable, or generally moody. Chronic stress is associated with anger8, in particular.

5. Big changes and life turbulence

Some life experiences may make a person more likely to be emotional in general, says Hendel. Big life transitions, relationship troubles, and world crises like a pandemic can cause heightened anxiety, which can make you feel emotional as a result. Some studies have shown that using mindfulness as a mechanism for responding to stress9 can help you regulate your emotions more effectively.

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6. Grief and trauma

When a tragic event happens in your life, your emotional well-being can suffer. Research suggests people have heightened emotional reactions after trauma10, including sexual assault, physical assault, car accidents, and significant illness and injury. Emotions like fear, shame, guilt, anger, and sadness tend to be particularly high following trauma for obvious reasons. Early life stress11, such as child abuse and stress, has also been linked with psychiatric disorders including depression and bipolar.

That said, trauma is complex: Your emotions may feel out of control, or you may feel like you don't have emotions at all. Both of these responses are normal. Either way, it's important to seek help from a qualified therapist so you can work through the challenging situation and clue into what your emotions might be telling you.

Hendel says it's important to remember that people who've experienced a lack of safety and security in their lives are also likely to have more emotional triggers.

7. Hormonal imbalances

Anyone who's been through PMS or been pregnant knows that hormones can cause your emotions to spike unpredictably at certain times in life. It's important to remember the impermanence of your emotions during these times and to develop healthy mechanisms for labeling the emotional tidal waves as they rise and fall.

8. Depression and other mental health conditions

Conditions like depression and anxiety are linked with difficulty regulating emotions12. Anxious individuals often find themselves in a flurry of emotions tied to fears about the past and the future, while depressed individuals may experience emotional muting. Knowing your mental health history can give you a touchpoint for checking in when your emotions feel out of control. Are these signals telling you the truth about perceived warning signs, or are they igniting fears that may not be rooted in reality?

Other conditions like ADHD and personality disorders can also affect mood and emotional processing. If you're concerned, you might benefit from speaking with a trained mental health professional.

9. Genetics

Studies have also shown that emotional functioning is heritable13, meaning that you may get your inclination toward emotiveness partially from your parents or ancestors. Some research suggests particularly emotional people may have slightly different brain chemistry, including increased blood flow in the regions that process emotions and empathy.

10. You're out of touch with your emotions

Some people have a tendency to suppress their emotions or believe that avoiding emotional reactions is "being strong. " Thus, when their emotions finally get too powerful to ignore, they feel like they're out of control or being "overly emotional"—when in reality, they've just been out of touch with their emotions for so long that they're not used to experiencing them.

In other words, you may feel like you're being very emotional right now because you think emotions are not OK, when in reality your feelings right now are totally normal and even healthy.

Many cultures still treat emotions as untouchable entities not acceptable for public conversation, and there is little education about how to process difficult emotions. People raised as boys and men, especially, are discouraged from engaging with their emotions. If you tend to judge others and/or yourself for being emotional, it's worth interrogating your meta-emotions—i.e., how you feel about emotions in general.

11. You're a highly sensitive person (HSP)

Yes, emotional can simply be your natural disposition, Hendel says.  

Some people are by nature more sensitive than others. These people are sometimes referred to as highly sensitive people (HSPs). As much as 20% of the population may be HSPs, according to some research. Carpenter says highly sensitive people might be more likely to feel more deeply—which may mean they're prone to heightened emotional experiences.

Healthy ways to process your emotions.

Sometimes it can feel like your emotions are getting the best of you. Carpenter uses depression as an example: When you're depressed, you may feel emotionally like you're missing something in your life. Along with this, you may think that you are unlovable, unwanted, or maybe even undeserving—and while the emotional experience is valid, the thoughts behind it aren't helpful. 

"This is when emotions can feel difficult to work through," Carpenter says. "But with practice, we can feel less overwhelmed."

Processing your emotions in a healthy way is all about paying attention. Rather than burying them, learn to separate your emotions from their associated thoughts using this emotional coping method from psychologist Danielle Dowling, Psy.D.:

1.

Accept your emotions.

Ignoring your emotions can lead to an explosion later on. Instead, try to identify your emotions by noticing where they live in your physical body. You might feel an emotion as a stomachache or jaw tension. 

2.

Name your emotions.

Joy, anger, sadness—all emotions are healthy and can help you, and the first step is simply to name it. It's also important to remember that there's a difference between saying, "I am angry," and "I feel angry." You are not your emotion.

Hendel also notes there are two categories of emotions to watch for: core emotions and inhibitory emotions. Core emotions tell us about our environments. "Core emotions are brilliant," she says. "Their innate programming tells us important information to help us thrive." They include sadness, fear, anger, joy, excitement, sexual excitement, and disgust, she says. Inhibitory emotions, on the other hand, are emotions that often prevent you from experiencing those core emotions. These include shame, anxiety, and guilt. 

3.

Recognize the impermanence of your emotion.

You won't feel this way forever. Emotions are fleeting, like waves passing through your body.

4.

Investigate the origin.

Take a moment to think about what has happened to cause that negative emotion. Ask yourself: Why do I feel this way?

5.

Let go of control.

Tolerating negative emotions can be anxiety-provoking, but moving through hard stuff—even if it takes a while—can help you build personal awareness and coping skills. Emotions may be out of your control, but how you respond to them is within your control.

6.

Meditate with a mantra.

Consider meditating with a phrase in your mind. This can help you control your anxiety, check in with yourself, and increase happiness. Dowling suggests using the phrase, "Breathe in peace, love, forgiveness. Breathe out anything that no longer serves me."

When to seek help.

Sometimes emotions can be tough to handle alone. If you feel deeply distressed or out of control, seek help from a qualified therapist. If your emotions feel like they are negatively affecting different areas of your life, this is also a sign that you should reach out to learn new tools and strategies for coping.

If your emotions are leading to suicidal thoughts, seek help immediately or call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

"I'm too emotional" | PSYCHOLOGIES

Question to the ExpertKnow Yourself

I am friendly, outgoing, eloquent. I can win over a person. But too quickly imbued with the mood and emotions of others. If someone feels bad, I take his situation too close to my heart and for a long time I can not let go of his emotions. If someone or I is treated unfairly, such indignation flares up inside, which I cannot contain. I start defending or defending myself. If someone begins to swear in front of me, my heart beats like a rabbit, although this does not concern me, but worrying about others leads to great anxiety. On the other hand, I can easily burst into tears when I see something sweet and touching, when people sincerely talk about feelings and experiences, when they help others. I lack the knowledge to control myself quickly and painlessly enough.

Andrey, 22 years old

In difficult situations of loss, in a state of stress, a person uses various channels. There are only six of them. Knowing and understanding the principles of their work, we can help ourselves or others get out of the crisis. What channels do we have?

  • Feelings and emotions
  • Logic, intelligence
  • Faith and meanings
  • Family, friends, close people
  • Body (physical activity, body care, massage, procedures)
  • Creativity (art therapy or cinema, theater) , hobbies and everything connected with it)

Your leading channel is probably emotional. Knowing about this already makes it possible to work with him both in a positive and negative direction. You describe your pros and cons very well, which shows your capacity for acceptance and emotional empathy. But if a person knows how to empathize and help another in a good way, then he is also emotional in a negative sense. Our world is dual, and everything has a positive and a negative characteristic.

But if we accept our “pluses” with joy, then we are ready to disown our “minuses”. It doesn't happen otherwise. An emotional person rises to the heights of love, but also descends to hate. Our world is under the influence of the wave. What to do in such a situation? Learn to switch attention, perception and reactions.

Ask yourself the question: to what extent is my reflection a plus for me, and what burdens and distracts me? By answering, you decide a lot for yourself. Look at your channels. Which of them are basic, and which can be used additionally.

Photo source: Getty Images

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Causes of strong emotionality.

Emotional person

Heightened emotionality, like a barrel of gunpowder - you bring a match and everything explodes. Such emotional outbursts can greatly spoil the life of both a person and others.

It is more difficult for a person with increased emotionality to study, build relationships and a career. Moreover, rest is needed from constant emotional stress. I would like to find a solution.

Accumulation of emotional stress

Everything that happens to a person is stored in the subconscious. Under hypnosis, people easily recall even the smallest and oldest details of their lives. Experienced emotions are saved too, over time being forced out into the subconscious is getting deeper.

Most often this question is asked by women: “Why am I so emotional?”. The answer is simple - in people with increased emotionality, the repression of emotions is slower than their accumulation.

Having accumulated emotional tension, a person must find a way to get rid of it. Such emotional intensity is recommended to be removed by physical exercises, shouting into a pillow, meditation or breathing practices.

Emotions over the edge

An emotional person quickly develops irritation and increased activity. If you do not take action, then at some point (point of no return), emotions take over.

Emergency methods for relieving heightened emotionality - breathing, exercises, etc. don't work when emotions are running high. The person is no longer and, quite often, his behavior.

The more emotional a person is, the less chance he has to relieve tension before the explosion. This suggests that it is necessary to solve the situation with increased emotionality in advance, while the person is calm.

Raising the threshold of emotionality

Significantly it is possible to lower the emotionality of a person by freeing the subconscious from old emotions . Children experience emotions very quickly, because they have a huge resource of emotional stress. An adult must work with the subconscious in order to release the resource occupied by the "junk".

The good news is that working to free the subconscious mind from emotions gives quick results. You don't need to meditate in caves for 10 years to become calmer. Using a powerful technique for several months can get rid of heightened emotionality forever.

Working with the past and emotions

A lot of emotional stress remains in childhood traumas. Many memories carry a negative charge. So, starting to work with the subconscious, you can not only get rid of increased emotionality but also remove the negative charge from the past .

The first two stages of work (about 1.5-2 months) are aimed at working with the past and emotions. Do not delay until the next explosion, because emergency methods do not work. Start working now and very soon you will not recognize yourself.

(after clicking the book will start downloading automatically).


Many people complain that they cannot "box up" their nerves, restrain themselves in order to maintain balance and not ignite a brewing conflict, get rid of feelings of nervousness and anxiety, or "recover themselves" after an emotional upheaval, stress. There are more than enough circumstances in life that provoke a surge of emotions: exams, job interviews, conclusion of important deals, showdown with superiors or a loved one ... But you never know the things in life that can unbalance us. An unbalanced person can explode and say too much, cry, commit an act that he will later regret - and thereby spoil not only the impression of himself, but also close some opportunities for himself.

There are two ways to overcome emotional crises. First - restrain emotions , not the best, because by suppressing emotions in ourselves, we risk accumulating a critical mass of negativity inside - and a real emotional explosion will occur. Second - learn to control yourself and dominate your emotions. This way is more productive.

Take care of yourself

It is important to understand for yourself how an emotional breakdown manifests itself in you. One person breaks down into aggression, the second suddenly begins to cry, the third is speechless. You should carefully study your own reactions and build the situation in such a way as to protect yourself in the eyes of others. Therefore, when you feel that emotions are starting to get out of control, make sure that the consequences of an emotional outburst do not affect your career, do not ruin your public speaking, do not make you feel ashamed or embarrassed in front of witnesses of your weakness.

Cope with fatigue

Emotional control is weakened when a person is tired. You should not accumulate fatigue, fight it. Allow yourself to relax, change the environment, treat yourself to something pleasant. Camping, partying with trusted friends, or shopping for some nice shopping will help shift your energy to positive things and reduce the risk of an emotional breakdown with negative consequences. Physical work helps a lot, just do not forget that physical work should bring pleasure. During a break or vacation, work on strengthening the nervous system. To do this, you may have to do meditation, yoga, sports exercises. Walks will not interfere, during which you can, for example, collect pebbles or take photographs. Don't forget that creativity heals. Think of forgotten hobbies, read a book that you have long put aside for reading. Sit by the water, get rid of obsessive thoughts, listen to the birds singing or just watch in the aquarium.

Breathe deeply

If you feel stressed out, stop, get comfortable, relax, breathe deeply and slowly, try not to rush. No need to be afraid to be late - remember that your peace of mind is the key to efficiency in any work. Analyze your own emotions: try to understand what exactly unsettles you, what is the trigger for emotions. You should not skimp on the time if you want to dedicate it to "putting things in order" inside. Clear thoughts are a guarantee that emotions will not overwhelm you unexpectedly. Favorite music will help bring emotions and thoughts into a state of harmony. You should not listen to something new in critical situations. Familiar calm music will work well, it will relieve stress and return emotions to their usual course.

Do not be afraid to contact a psychotherapist

If you are becoming less and less able to control your emotions, and the suppression of emotions has a depressing effect on your mood, besides, you are confused and cannot calm down on your own, and “flashes” of adrenaline inside plunge you into a state of melancholy or fright - you should think about a visit to a psychologist, psychotherapist. A professional in his field will help you understand the intricacies of causes and effects, remember forgotten nervous shocks and difficult impressions in order to experience them consciously and part with them. By the way, a reliable friend or girlfriend can play the role of a psychotherapist. You can, of course, rely on your loved one in these matters, but this is fraught with consequences. Close, loving people are impressionable, and if you “load” such a person, relationships can suffer, and feelings of awkwardness and guilt can push you away from the one who involuntarily became a “vest” for you. However, if there is unconditional trust and spiritual intimacy between you and a loved one, then you can even give vent to tears. By crying, you will free your psyche from unnecessary emotions.

“I'm about to explode like three hundred tons of TNT,” V. Vysotsky sang in one of his songs, conveying the feelings of an upset graphomaniac. Probably, the vast majority of people in the world are familiar with such sensations, when the accumulated emotions literally overwhelm the whole body, trying to break out. However, in most cultures, the violent manifestation of feelings is by no means welcomed, and people are forced to keep their experiences to themselves so as not to cause condemnation of others.

Manual

However, it is completely useless to try to hide your feelings in any situation. Strong emotions still require an outlet and sooner or later they will find it, and attempts to suppress their manifestations by willpower will only lead to illness and chronic stress. It is much smarter and more useful for the body to find socially acceptable forms for expressing its experiences.

First of all, as psychologists advise, allow yourself to experience strong emotions, including negative ones. Emotion is just a personal reaction to surrounding events. And if the circumstances or actions of other people make you feel resentment, anger or annoyance, you have a right to such experiences. The question is how to throw out these negative emotions so as not to harm other people and to come to peace of mind yourself.

The easiest and most affordable way to quickly reduce emotional intensity is increased physical activity. If you feel like you are literally being torn apart by emotions, want to scream at the top of your voice and destroy furniture, find an opportunity to give immediate exercise to your body. To do this, it is not necessary to immediately run to the gym, if there is no such possibility. Fast walking down the street, intense climbing and descending stairs, even just a series of active squats will play a positive role.

As soon as you feel that the most intense peak of emotions has passed and the body is tired, move on to breathing exercises. The human nervous system is closely connected with the respiratory and cardiovascular systems. Therefore, a purposeful series of deep, even inhalations and exhalations will help to normalize frustrated nerves. It is most convenient to regulate breathing with the help of a count: inhale for 3-4 counts, exhale for 6-8 counts. After a few full breaths, you will feel that your mind has cleared and your emotions are back under control.

The described method is well suited for a one-time release of emotions resulting from some short-term unpleasant situation. But negative emotions can accumulate for a long time under the influence of chronic stress. For example, tensions in the family, protracted problems at work, conflicts or an urgent deadline. In this case, exercise alone is not enough.

Tears help some women in difficult situations. After crying for a few minutes, they begin to feel much better and calmer, since tears are a natural physiological mechanism that helps to cope with stressful situations and relieve excessive pressure. However, do not forget that tears are not always appropriate. For example, throwing a temper tantrum in response to the criticism and nagging of the boss is not the best way to maintain your professional reputation. In this case, it is much more useful to try to sort out an unpleasant situation consciously. Talk to the manager about existing problems or with opponents in the conflict. If there is not enough independent effort, it is better to turn to an experienced psychologist who will help you sort out your feelings and suggest the best solution.

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Useful advice

Try to never throw out your negative emotions on loved ones, even if they are the cause. In the end, you will cope with your feelings, but the emotional trauma inflicted on loved ones will remain and it will not be very easy to heal them.

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  • how to throw out the negative

Scientists have proven that negative emotions have a bad effect on the body as a whole. So happiness is good for health. What emotions experienced by a person have a bad effect on his health?

First, it is greed. This feeling is known to lead to eating disorders. The desire to appropriate all earthly blessings in a direct way leads to constipation.

The second emotion that harms health is envy. Worrying about someone else's good, the inability to be happy if others feel good is a big stress for the body, which can lead to a heart attack. Other people's victories are best used as a platform for their achievements.

Jealousy not only destroys love, but weakens the production of sex hormones, which increases the risk for a man to become impotent, and for a woman to remain infertile.

Another harmful feeling is this self-pity. If you constantly revel in this experience, then the production of the hormone acetylcholine increases in the body, and this can affect the liver. There are other harmful consequences of such an emotion - sugar drops in the human body, digestion is disturbed.

The other extreme is the feeling of guilt. If a person constantly feels guilty about something or simply blames himself for nothing, then immunity is undermined in his body, hence colds, infections, stomach ulcers and even oncology. You need to forgive yourself for your sins and mistakes. Health is more precious than anything in the world.

And the pancreas and respiratory organs suffer from despondency and melancholy. The lungs are also sick from constant introspection and doubt - these feelings increase the risk of asthma.

In addition to envy, the heart and blood vessels can also suffer from anger, rage, and passivity at the moment when everything inside demands a change in the state of affairs. Excessive anxiety, causeless anxiety can develop "nervous" hypertension. Fear also raises the pressure.

60% of all illnesses are the result of harmful emotions and experiences. All of them shorten our lives. Forgiveness, kindness, love, joy prevent inflammatory processes, improve blood composition, improve important processes inside: the work of the brain, heart and other organs. Positive thoughts help restore and preserve health.

Many people think that the body is badly affected by such an emotion as anger. In fact, anger is not as bad as suppressing it.

A study was conducted which found that couples who constantly suppress their emotions and control their anger are more likely to live less than those who unleash their emotions as they arise.

Many people think that the problem is the manifestation of anger. But it should be noted that there is no problem that sometimes you want to yell at your loved one for not taking away dirty socks around the apartment or forgot to pay utility bills. It has been proven that it is not dangerous that anger manifests itself, but attempts to suppress it until the moment when a person can no longer cope with his emotions.

Many have been taught since childhood not to show their emotions unnecessarily so as not to cause discomfort to others. But constant suppression of your emotions, overwork at work and stress due to constant workloads can lead to emotional exhaustion and inability to control yourself. Research findings confirm that persistent suppression of anger due to a situation that recurs periodically can lead to high blood pressure and heart palpitations, even just thinking about the event itself.

Anger often arises from fear or discomfort in a particular situation. Anger is not the original emotion, it is only a consequence of other emotions. Thus, the body, for safety reasons, translates emotions in order to protect itself.

In order for anger not to take possession of a person, one must stop. If a conflict situation arises and anger begins to take over the body, you need to postpone the conversation for a while (at least for 15 minutes). This will help put your thoughts in order and better control the situation. If the reason for the anger is constant (bad work, constant contact with unpleasant people), it is worth giving yourself a few vacation days and thinking about whether a change of job or environment might be the best option.

Our emotional background can change several times a day. It depends on various factors, which include:

Communication;

Thought process;

Relations with colleagues and family;

State of health.

Susceptibility to negative emotions depends on the nature of the person. Someone does not perceive the negative, and someone passes it through themselves, worsening their well-being. One way or another, all people are exposed to harmful emotions, so that the negative does not accumulate inside, you must follow certain rules.

Focus less on the bad

It's hard not to remember the joke about the glass half full and half empty. This container was half full, the pessimist said the glass was half empty, and the optimist said it was half full. It all depends on how we perceive the situation.

Take a break from unnecessary information

Starting in the morning, we are literally “poured” with streams of unnecessary information that clog our consciousness and lead to overwork. Try to be more silent.

Take time to relax

Be sure to take some time for yourself. If the day was difficult and the soul is sad, then you can meditate, pray, sleep or read.

Each person is inscribed in the strict system of this world, changing it and changing himself. Emotions become a reaction to external influences, which prompt response actions. They are diverse, so the study of the emotional world of a person is one of the most interesting topics. And if you are interested in this aspect of a particular person, then you can discover almost all the reasons for his actions, and even predict actions.

The emotional world of a person

All people are different: someone is touched to tears at the sight of a fluffy kitten, and someone without visible effort holds a stone mask, looking through the bloody details from the crime scenes. This does not mean that one person is good and the other is bad. They just have different temperaments, circumstances and ways of perceiving the world around them. And each of the styles of behavior has its own advantages and disadvantages.

Pros and cons of being an emotional person

A developed emotional sphere reveals a number of positive aspects to a person:

  • bright and rich impressions;
  • flair of attraction due to the openness of reactions;
  • the desire to constantly discover something new, which ensures saturation with interesting events;
  • a rarity of emotional tension, because after any event a person quickly discharges.

The downside is a vivid reaction to all events, sometimes even excessive, which in some situations can become a hindrance.

Pros and cons of a restrained person

A person who is used to keeping his emotions in check also has reasons for joy:

  • he is able to think soberly in difficult situations;
  • his life is not characterized by sharp ups and downs, preference is given to stability.

The downside is the inability to get rid of one's emotions or channel them into another channel. Therefore, such a person may suffer from emotional tension caused by the constant accumulation and replay of experiences. And this leads to burnout and depression, which can be very difficult to resolve on your own.

Emotional reaction in extreme conditions

If we talk about the emotional reaction of a person in extreme conditions, then it is impossible to predict which type will succeed better in stabilizing the situation.

According to studies, only 25% in extreme conditions are able to act in accordance with the situation.

Emotionality is the ability of a person to reflect the content of experiences, mood, character. Emotionality can and should be considered as a response to the surrounding world by the manifestation of emotions and their influence on human behavior. Emotionality is inherent in people, because by showing emotions, we get to know life, paint it with different colors, even if not the most pleasant shades.

The word "emotion" comes from the Latin "emovere" - to put forward, to excite, to shake. Emotion is a process that is equally psychological and biochemical, arising as a reaction in response to events occurring with a person. do not depend on the objects they are aimed at. The same emotion can be expressed at different times for different reasons and to completely different people and situations, which cannot be said about feelings. Feelings are more complex and always have an addressee. From the point of view of evolution, emotionality is a more ancient form of manifestation of a person's attitude to the world around him, therefore emotions are inherent in both animals and humans. Feelings are the prerogative of man.

How to develop emotionality

Emotion is a reaction to what is happening, which can be called “here and now”. Emotions appear at a particular moment and reflect the attitude of the manifesting experience to what is happening. Feelings, on the contrary, have a relative stability and constancy and always have an address - the object to which they are directed. Psychologists identify emotions that are called basic or innate. They are named so because they are inherent in all healthy people and manifest themselves in the same way on all continents and in different nationalities. Basic emotions are emotions that are common to all. To date, seven basic ones have been identified: joy (happiness, contentment), (, rage), sadness (sadness), interest, disgust and surprise.

The ability to express the strength and energy of one's emotions characterizes emotionality as a personality trait. Many psychologists consider emotionality as one of the main components. Emotionality is characterized by a lightning-fast change of emotions, which, moreover, manifest themselves vividly. Emotionality is inside, passions are seething there, the speed of the movements of experiences, but the splash outward is barely noticeable, insignificant. more slow and balanced, emotions are not so violent. Emotionality is in full balance, the birth and manifestation of experiences are not bright.

I think everyone knows the expressions “nothing to penetrate”, “thick-skinned like an elephant”, “cold” and the like. All these expressions speak of a low level of emotional response. Emotion can be developed.

In order to successfully develop emotionality, it is necessary to get acquainted with emotions and feelings, identify for yourself those that a person experiences most often, and also observe the behavior and manifestation of emotions, both in oneself and in other people.

Next, it is important to answer the question “what can I change in my behavior?” Emotionality is openness to the world. Psychologists advise to communicate more, because uncommunicative people, as a rule, are closed people. It is necessary to try to show emotions with gestures, words, talk about feelings, become more open, smile more often. This facilitates communication and understanding.

It has been noticed that the absence of an external manifestation of emotionality does not always indicate the absence of emotions themselves. There are cases when, due to the inability to express their feelings (not appropriate, not on time, not brought up, etc.), a person restrains them or, in other words, suppresses them, there is an internal accumulation of emotional stress.

Periodic suppression of one's own experiences negatively affects a person's health, both physical and mental. Unexpressed emotions threaten an explosion of feelings, which can result in hysteria or in and, undoubtedly, manifest itself in the body as an increase in pressure due to a rush of blood to the brain, in the limbs, and will also affect the respiratory apparatus.

Emotionality without discharge is like a dormant volcano, ready to erupt at any moment, and one can only guess what will be the starting point. At any moment, the effect of the last drop will definitely occur and no one knows what the consequences will be. Is it worth bringing this up? The danger of an explosion is associated not only with the suppression of emotions, but also with the increased emotionality of a person.

High emotionality is characterized by the rapid onset of irritation and increased response. If you ignore the accumulation of emotions, then there will come a point of no return, and under such conditions they will take over.

High emotionality of a person has its pros and cons. We can assume that this statement is very relative, because how many people, so many opinions. Let's figure it out. The advantage is that, when manifested, emotions splash out, are not suppressed, are not repressed, are not pushed deeper, but are issued into the world. However, high emotionality is mostly destructive. Perhaps you are familiar with the situation when, having lost control over themselves, people allow themselves too much in relation to other people (raising their voice, insulting, knocking on the door, etc.). What a residue of embarrassment and worries about this often remains on both sides of the situation. High emotionality negatively affects relationships and also negatively affects the person himself, driving him into a feeling of guilt, forcing him to justify himself and others, accumulating resentment.

How to deal with over emotionality

Recognize that over emotionality is your character trait. Do a self-analysis. Determine for yourself the level of your emotionality, how quick-tempered and intolerant you are. You can take tests to determine your temperament and emotionality.

Keep an emotional diary where you describe your day and your experiences. And it’s better to write down immediately after an emotional outburst what you felt, how you experienced it, how your body reacted, where you responded and how the emotions subsided. After reading what you have written, evaluate your attitude towards it. Which of your reactions was justified. What feelings are you experiencing now?

Get to know your triggers - situations that trigger your body to activate all systems again and again and give out an emotional reaction, invigorate your emotionality. Perhaps much earlier in your head formed a pattern of behavior in response to a stressful situation. And, perhaps, you constantly repeat this pattern of behavior. At this point, ask yourself, “How exactly do I feel right now? When did I show such emotions? What is the trigger? You can also do this with a diary of experiences. You can change your behavior and your emotionality. Do not hurry. Getting to know yourself, your emotionality and the emotions you show is not an easy job. Do not force yourself to do everything at once, too hasty actions lead to resistance. Personal growth is always a way out of the comfort zone, and such a way out is not easy and requires mental, emotional and physical costs. But do not be discouraged, “eating an elephant” is completely difficult, but in parts it is very possible. If you find it difficult to gather strength and meet your emotionality, set simpler goals for yourself, more achievable.

Get to know the concept of personalization, recognize it and fight it. This is a concept that can cause increased emotionality. It may mean that you feel responsible for things that may not have anything to do with you personally or that you have no control over.

Fight the obligation. Claiming that you owe someone something harms and forces you to adhere to standards that may be exaggerated. Violating the next “should”, you may well experience despair, guilt, anger. You can avoid situations like this by learning what exactly is under this "should" and only then decide if it really is. As a result, you will not experience negative emotions. And the words “must” and “should”, if necessary, can be replaced with the word “I want” and things will go much easier.

Act only after you have calmed down. Your emotionality is sometimes not the best adviser, and acting under the influence of emotions can lead to consequences that you may deeply regret in the future. Try to calm down before reacting to a situation that caused a strong emotional reaction.

Allow yourself to feel your emotions. Correcting your emotionality, working on increased emotionality, you should not become completely unemotional, we have already talked about the dangers of suppressing emotional outbursts. It is necessary to get to know and understand emotions, to realize also that negative emotional outbursts are just as necessary as positive ones, and try to keep their balance.

In the middle of the last century, scientists started talking about the concept of emotional intelligence. The concept was introduced when it was noticed that a high level did not always contribute to a person's success in a career and personal life. According to scientists, emotional intelligence, unlike intelligence, is the ability to correctly interpret the emotionality, feelings and behavior of other people, intuitively grasp what the other person needs, and also have a high. The whole theory is based on the assumption that a person is able to accurately determine the emotions of another person, and also on the fact that emotionality can be learned to manage. Not only the face, but also the body is able to convey emotions, and if you observe these manifestations and learn to notice them, you can read all the emotions of another person like an open book.

But observation is enough? If your emotionality is high, behind your own raging emotionality you will not see someone else's. With low emotionality, you are not able to see changes in the emotional state of another person. If your emotions are stereotyped, you will never notice the subtleties of mood and the coloring of the emotionality of another person. In others, you will feel and see only those emotions that you yourself are capable of. Your brain will give you the response that was once most effective. It is necessary to learn to distinguish between tones and semitones of emotional outbursts. And if your brain is able to scream and cry with joy, laugh and frown, smile quietly, talk about your happiness or go inside, then your brain will be able to adjust your emotions to any situation. Your range of expression and perception of emotions will expand, and your own emotionality will be balanced.

Learn emotions, new words to describe emotional outbursts. Not just “happy”, but “immensely happy”, “quietly happy”, “satisfied and happy”, “happy”. Try on emotions on yourself in front of a mirror. Emotional growth, like physical growth, takes time and is not always pleasant. And be patient.

Man has in his arsenal many qualities that favorably distinguish him from representatives of the animal world. One of these properties is emotionality. This is the ability to reflect the content of mood, feelings, character. Not all people are emotionally the same. Some share their mood too generously with the world, without hiding anything. Is it good, is it easy for such people to live? Others seem closed, cold, emotionless. Coldness is also not liked by society, it is equated with closeness. And unemotional people are shunned. In this article we will talk about emotionality, its varieties, how to develop it for those who lack it.

Release your emotions

You must have heard the following phrase: "Give vent to your emotions!" This is not an accidental expression, it is firmly fixed in our language. We are not passive chips in the river of life, but are constantly washed by its waves, sometimes voluntarily or involuntarily participating in real storms. Every day we experience a lot of emotions, and the mood changes from major to completely minor. In order not to go crazy from all these experiences, a person has the opportunity to share them with the world - this is his emotionality. This begs the question: why aren't all people equally emotional? Let's try to figure it out below.

What prevents the release of emotions

They even behave naturally and do not hesitate to show what they feel. Agree that no kid will hold back tears when it hurts, or laughter when it's fun. It follows that we begin to close ourselves with awareness of ourselves as individuals, that is, with age. Most often it is a response to life circumstances. The child is not shy about expressing his emotions until he is shamed by a parent or caregiver: "Don't laugh so loudly, it's indecent!" Or: "Yes, why did you dismiss the nurses, well, just like a girl!" A few of these remarks from a person who is considered authoritative really affect emotionality. The child begins to behave more restrained and understands that calm behavior does not cause any complaints from adults. "You go quieter - you will continue," and the baby gets used to hiding his mood from the world.

Coldness as a result of insults in the past

Sometimes emotionality (expressiveness, in other words) can be hidden for another reason. For example, a harsh reaction to openness will cause a desire to no longer show emotions. Imagine a young man who has stepped over his shyness and passionately confesses his love to a girl. Instead of acceptance and reciprocity, he is rejected by a beautiful lady, and is also ridiculed. Will he have a desire to be sincere in the future? Most likely, he will put on a mask of a cynic and act coldly with the opposite sex once and for all. We have all experienced the negative reaction of a particular person or society to openness, and this always leads to the same result. We become more restrained, we understand when it is appropriate to be natural and open, and when it is worth portraying a "poker face", even if we want to scream.

Man is not passive, and his reactions to the world are not something stable. Therefore, hiding your emotions is more of a defensive reaction than a distinctive character trait.

Unemotionality as a mask

People should not be divided into "emotional" and "unemotional". It must be accepted as a fact that ardor and openness can be hidden behind the mask of a cold person, but it is precisely because of these traits that the personality may once have suffered. Is there any way to remove this mask?

It is difficult to forcefully influence a person's temperament and emotionality. A person should have his own desire to become more open to the world, not be afraid to show his emotions and feelings. After that, expressiveness is just a matter of time.

Developing emotionality

High emotionality still has more advantages than low emotionality. It is for this reason that if you feel that you are not temperamental enough, you can develop this quality in yourself. Below we will give three really effective and simple ways to develop such an important quality as emotionality. Levels of passionarity, of course, are different, and from quiet you will not turn overnight into the soul of the company. But to become more open and more emotional will turn out quickly enough if you train and do not neglect simple exercises.

Useful exercises for developing openness


Is excessive expression of emotions useful?

Heightened emotionality is the other side of excessiveness in the issue of the manifestation of feelings and the degree of openness. Surely you know such people - a shirt-guy in a team, a person on the board who has no secrets and secrets from anyone. Is it good to be like that, or is such a temperament more of a disadvantage?

First of all, let's talk about the advantage that a person has, whose character trait is great emotionality. This is the presence of an extensive circle of acquaintances, the ease of meeting new people, the ability not to be bored alone.

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