How to control intrusive thoughts

Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts | Anxiety and

04.26.2018

Martin Seif, PhD, ABPP

Dr. Martin Seif is a master clinician who has spent the last thirty years developing innovative and highly successful treatment methods for anxiety disorders. He helped found ADAA and has served on its Board of Directors and Clinical Advisory Board. Dr. Seif has offices in Manhattan, NY and Greenwich, CT. For the last 18 years, he has been Associate Director of the Anxiety and Phobia Treatment Center for White Plains Hospital Center. He also trains therapists and psychiatric residents at New York-Presbyterian Hospital.

Sally Winston, PsyD

Dr. Sally Winston is a clinical psychologist and co-director of the Anxiety and Stress Disorders Institute of Maryland. She is nationally recognized for her expertise in the treatment of anxiety disorders. Dr. Winston has been active with ADAA for over 30 years. She has served as chair of the ADAA Clinical Advisory Board and was the first recipient of the ADAA Jerilyn Ross Clinician Advocate Award.

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April 26, 2018

Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts

Unwanted intrusive thoughts are stuck thoughts that cause great distress. They seem to come from out of nowhere, arrive with a whoosh, and cause a great deal of anxiety. The content of unwanted intrusive thoughts often focuses on sexual or violent or socially unacceptable images. People who experience unwanted intrusive thoughts are afraid that they might commit the acts they picture in their mind. They also fear that the thoughts mean something terrible about them. Some unwanted intrusive thoughts consist of repetitive doubts about relationships, decisions small and large, sexual orientation or identity, intrusions of thoughts about safety, religion, death or worries about questions that cannot be answered with certainty. Some are just weird thoughts that make no apparent sense. Unwanted Intrusive thoughts can be very explicit, and many people are ashamed and worried about them, and therefore keep them secret.

There are many myths about unwanted intrusive thoughts. One of the most distressing is that having such thoughts mean that you unconsciously want to do the things that come into your mind. This is simply not true, and, in fact, the opposite is true. It is the effort people use to fight the thought that makes it stick and fuels its return. People fight thoughts because the content seems alien, unacceptable, and at odds with who they are. So, people with violent unwanted intrusive thoughts are gentle people. People who have unwanted intrusive thoughts about suicide love life. And those who have thoughts of yelling blasphemies in church value their religious life. A second myth is that every thought we have is worth examining. In truth, these thoughts are not messages, red flags, signals or warnings--despite how they feel.

The problem for people who have these thoughts--and one estimate is that more than 6 million people in the United States are troubled by them-- is that unwanted intrusive thoughts feel so threatening. That is because anxious thinking takes over, and the thought—as abhorrent as it might be—seems to have power it does not. People tend to try desperately and urgently to get rid of the thoughts, which, paradoxically, fuels their intensity. The harder they try to suppress or distract or substitute thoughts, the stickier the thought becomes.

People who are bothered by intrusive thoughts need to learn a new relationship to their thoughts--that sometimes the content of thoughts are irrelevant and unimportant. That everyone has occasional weird, bizarre, socially improper and violent thoughts. Our brains sometimes create junk thoughts, and these thoughts are just part of the flotsam and jetsam of our stream of consciousness. Junk thoughts are meaningless. If you don’t pay attention or get involved with them, they dissipate and get washed away in the flow of consciousness.

In reality, a thought—even a very scary thought—is not an impulse. The problem is not one of impulse control- it is over control. They are at opposite ends of the continuum. However, sufferers get bluffed by their anxiety, and become desperate for reassurance. However, reassurance only works temporarily, and people can become reassurance junkies. The only way to effectively deal with intrusive obsessive thoughts is by reducing one’s sensitivity to them. Not by being reassured that it won’t happen or is not true.

Unwanted intrusive thoughts are reinforced by getting entangled with them, worrying about them, struggling against them, trying to reason them away. They are also made stronger by trying to avoid them. Leave the thoughts alone, treat them as if they are not even interesting, and they will eventually fade into the background.

Here are steps for changing your attitude and overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts

Label these thoughts as "intrusive thoughts."
Remind yourself that these thoughts are automatic and not up to you.
Accept and allow the thoughts into your mind. Do not try to push them away.
Float, and practice allowing time to pass.
Remember that less is more. Pause. Give yourself time. There is no urgency.

Expect the thoughts to come back again
Continue whatever you were doing prior to the intrusive thought while allowing the anxiety to be present.

Try Not To:

Engage with the thoughts in any way.
Push the thoughts out of your mind.
Try to figure out what your thoughts "mean."
Check to see if this is “working” to get rid of the thoughts

This approach can be difficult to apply. But for anyone who keeps applying it for just a few weeks, there is an excellent chance that they will see a decrease in the frequency and intensity of the unwanted intrusive thoughts.

Our book is “Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts”. Selected in March 2019 as an Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies Self-Help Book Recommendation - an honor bestowed on outstanding self-help books that are consistent with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) principles and that incorporate scientifically tested strategies for overcoming mental health difficulties.

Get the Spanish version of the book "Guía para superar los pensamientos atemorizantes, obsesivos o inquietantes" here.

To sign up for a free e-newsletter that answers questions about intrusive thoughts, please visit this webpage: http://www.drmartinseif.com/

Additional Resources

What are Intrusive Thoughts and How Can You Deal with Them? ADAA Members Debra Kissen, PhD, MHSA and Paul Greene, PhD
ADAA invites you to view Dr. Seif and Dr. Winston's corresponding free webinar, Overcoming Intrusive Thoughts.
Check out this helpful video by professional graphic designer and animator J. Nordby on how he overcame his struggles with intrusive thoughts.

Dr. Winston and Dr. Seif In The News:

What a Sticky Mind Means
Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: How to Overcome Sticky, Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts, PsychologyToday.com, July, 2019

Martin Seif, PhD, ABPP

Sally Winston, PsyD

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Anxiety Disorders

Anxiety

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

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Managing intrusive thoughts - Harvard Health

Disturbing thoughts that pop into your mind unbidden may make you feel uneasy, but they are common — and there are strategies you can use to manage them.

It seems to come out of nowhere — a strange, disturbing thought or a troubling image that pops into your mind. It might be violent or sexual, or a recurring fear that you’ll do something inappropriate or embarrassing. Whatever the content, it’s often unsettling and may bring on feelings of worry or shame. The more you try to push the thought from your mind, the more it persists.

Intrusive thoughts, as these are called, are thought to affect some six million Americans, according to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America.

Sometimes intrusive thoughts are associated with a mental health disorder, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, where thoughts become so bothersome that they prompt repetitive behaviors or compulsions to try to prevent them from occurring. They are also common in post-traumatic stress disorder, which can be triggered by a life-threatening or extremely stressful event, such as an accident or violent attack. But many people who experience these thoughts don’t have a mental health disorder, says Dr. Kerry-Ann Williams, a lecturer in psychiatry at Harvard Medical School.

Intrusive thoughts are often triggered by stress or anxiety. They may also be a short-term problem brought on by biological factors, such as hormone shifts. For example, a woman might experience an uptick in intrusive thoughts after the birth of a child.

"Any life stressor, if big enough, can increase your risk of having intrusive thoughts," says Dr. Williams.

Periods of stress and isolation

These days many women have experienced significant stress from the isolation caused by the pandemic, says Dr. Olivera Bogunovic, an assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Anxiety symptoms may also commonly occur as women transition to a different stage of their life. They may become more isolated, or develop a fear of aging or of developing physical ailments, she says. This can lead to an uptick in anxiety, and in some instances, obsessive thinking.

While intrusive thoughts may be disturbing, they aren’t harmful or a sign that you have a secret desire to do the things that popped into your mind.

People are often too embarrassed or ashamed to talk about it, says Dr. Williams. "A lot of times when patients bring it up to me, they might preface it with something like, ‘I’m not crazy, but this weird thought comes into my mind,’" she says. "They might think about hurting a family member, such as a baby. When the thought happens, they’re horrified—‘I can’t even believe that came into my mind. I shouldn’t tell anyone; they might think something is wrong with me.’"

Identifying intrusive thoughts

So, how can you tell if you are experiencing intrusive thoughts? There are some signs to look for.

The thought is unusual for you. An intrusive thought is usually very different from your typical thoughts. "For example, it might be uncharacteristically violent," says Dr. Williams.

The thought is bothersome. If a thought is disturbing and it’s something you want to push out of your mind, it might be an intrusive thought.

The thought feels hard to control. Intrusive thoughts are often repetitive and won’t go away.

"The more you think about it, the more anxious you get and the worse the thoughts get," says Dr. Williams. Instead of fighting intrusive thoughts, it’s better to learn to live with them. When these thoughts emerge, try taking the following steps:

1. Identify the thought as intrusive. "Think to yourself, ‘that’s just an intrusive thought; it’s not how I think, it’s not what I believe, and it’s not what I want to do,’" says Dr. Williams.

2. Don’t fight with it. When you have an intrusive thought, just accept it. "Don’t try to make it go away."

3. Don’t judge yourself. Know that having a strange or disturbing thought doesn’t indicate that something is wrong with you.

When to seek help

See a mental health professional if unwanted thoughts are starting to disrupt your daily life, particularly if they’re impairing your ability to work or to do things you enjoy. However, even if intrusive thoughts aren’t affecting your life in a significant way, you can still see someone to get help.

Cognitive behavioral therapy is one strategy that is often successful in helping people manage intrusive thoughts. The process may help you to shift some of your general thought patterns, which can enable you to better manage these thoughts when they do occur and might lessen their frequency.

Intrusive thoughts can also be managed by addressing the underlying problem, such as anxiety, stress, or a personal history of trauma. While it may be helpful to share the particular thoughts you are having, keep in mind that even if you aren’t comfortable talking about them in detail, a therapist can still help. Women should also know that intrusive thoughts typically respond well to therapy, says Dr. Bogunovic.

"Keep in mind that you might not need help forever," says Dr. Williams. "It may be a very short-term thing."

Image: © Aleutie/Getty Images

How to get rid of obsessive thoughts: 6 life hacks

Health

Author Irina Rudevich

October 23, 2020

Sometimes it’s hard to stop the flow of unpleasant thoughts that seem to burst into your head and haunt you. We tell you how to eliminate the anxiety that has arisen and not dwell on this state

What are obsessive thoughts

Excessive experiences and repetitive dialogues arise spontaneously. You can go about your daily activities or get ready for bed, but suddenly a thought appears that draws all attention to itself. For many, it seems to get stuck in place, causing discomfort, disrupting biorhythms and disrupting plans. Obsessive thinking is a series of images that are repeated in combination with negative perceptions. The severity of their influence can range from mild but annoying to severe and all-encompassing. Particularly debilitating cases that prevent a person from living a full life are considered in psychiatry as obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

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Why do we think about unpleasant things

Psychologists do not have a clear answer to the question of where obsessive thoughts come from. According to one theory, repeated anxious thoughts indicate that a person has an unresolved issue and a life stage that has not been completed. It could be stress at work, relationship problems, or an unpleasant conversation with a stranger that happened a few days ago. But they are not always based on real events.

Everyone at least once left for work with the thought: “Did I turn off the iron?”, which haunted until the evening. “Thinking can be a problem because it rarely offers new ideas or solutions to fix a situation,” writes psychotherapist Jody Virgo [1]. Instead, they emotionally capture the person and reinforce negative feelings.

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It’s not easy not to think

It would seem that you just need to switch and forbid yourself to play the same record in your head. But our minds are built differently: when a person tries to avoid thinking, being under the influence of obsessive thoughts, the brain continues to remind us of them with greater force. It's the same principle that when you hear "don't think about the pink elephant" the first thing you do is imagine it. At the same time, thoughts without decisions and actions only take time and emotional resources. “They have no practical consequences, and in themselves they are unimportant,” says physician and writer Deepak Chopra [2]. But that doesn't change the fact that people suffer from obsessive thinking. Here are a few principles to help you deal with it:

Recognize the thought pattern
Transfer your thought to paper
Think about a solution
Accept separateness of thoughts
Practice meditation and mindful thinking
Contact a specialist

Recognize the thought pattern

To overcome intrusive thoughts, you need to identify them. The patterns may vary, but most of them are repeated over and over again. If a person often gets stuck in a cognitive cycle, then they turn into a habit that is more difficult to get rid of. It's like biting your nails or checking your email every few minutes, that is, actions (or thoughts) occur unconsciously. Caught yourself in a compulsive cycle - study it carefully. As Bruce M. Hyman and Cherry Pedrick write in The OCD Workbook, it pays to “examine these thoughts to understand how they arise and how you respond to them” [3].

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Transfer your thought to paper

As soon as you write down an obsession in a notebook or phone notes, it will no longer be cyclically spinning in your head. But the work is not over yet. It is important to determine the root cause of the negative experience.

For example, you are worried about not getting a response from a friend, or you are worried that you weren't good enough during your presentation. Formulate a problem: “I’m upset because I think I offended a loved one in some way” or “I’m afraid that they didn’t take me seriously because I was very nervous during the speech. ”

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Think about a solution

Sometimes obsessive thoughts are justified and require certain actions. If you seriously think that you have not turned off the iron, ask a family member or neighbor to come in and check if everything is in order. When you're worried about relationship problems, it's easier to ask your partner directly if everything is okay, rather than oppressing yourself with destructive thoughts. Sometimes thoughts cling to the past or rush into the future, and you worry about the future. Try to learn from the experience and evaluate what can be done to minimize stress in the coming changes.

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Accept Separateness of Thoughts

A difficult but important step in dealing with a problem is to recognize that thoughts are not always in your control. This is a series of neurons that fire in the brain as a result of not always obvious reactions, associations and experiences. Attempts to avoid obsessive thinking, to forcibly get rid of it, can only aggravate the situation. Acceptance can be the key to liberation, but not in the sense that you should give up and leave your mind to be torn apart by disturbing ideas. It is necessary to allow these thoughts to exist, to evaluate them, but not to try to control them.

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Practice meditation and mindful thinking

Obsessive thoughts cause discomfort because they are accompanied by negative emotions. Meditation and mindfulness exercises will help you get rid of oppressive experiences while you study the “enemy”. Psychologist Seth Meyers, in an article for Psychology Today, defines conscious thinking as “clearing and focusing on what your mind and body are feeling in the present moment” [4].

If you have obsessive thoughts, try a few simple breaths, counting slowly to five as you inhale and exhale. You can supplement the practice with physical exercises for "grounding": fix yourself in space, standing on the floor and focusing on the sensation in your legs. Look around, identify five things in turn that you feel with your senses in order to linger in the state of “here and now”.

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Consult a specialist

If obsessive thoughts are firmly planted in your mind, you cannot find their root cause and eliminate them, you should consult a psychologist. This must be done when you can’t cope on your own, and suffering and worries cause problems: you don’t get enough sleep, you can’t concentrate on work, or you are constantly in a bad mood. Obsessive thinking is a normal part of the human psyche. But it can also be a sign of medical conditions, including anxiety disorders, that require more careful consideration. The therapist will select appropriate practices to free the mind for pleasant and necessary thoughts.

How to choose a psychotherapist and prepare yourself for your first appointment .

7 ways to deal with bad thoughts

Unpleasant thoughts are sometimes more terrible than the events that caused them - it is extremely difficult to get rid of them. Some people spend several hours a day on them! What can be opposed to bad thoughts?

It turns out that there are a number of methods that will help block the appearance of bad thoughts or cope with them if they have already come. Most of these methods are offered by the American psychologist Danielle Wegner, who has devoted decades of her life to the problem.

1. SWITCH

Don't try not to think of a white monkey - think of a black one. Or better yet, a purple flamingo. Try to switch your mind to some other subject that you also like to think about very much, but which at the same time has positive connotations. Get yourself a few “continued” thoughts that raise more and more questions and the need for answers to them - which means they are drawn into a completely different stream of thoughts. Is it true that Brad Pitt has silicone muscles? I read about it somewhere. But if so, how does he use them? After all, silicone is not able to contract like real muscles - or is there some way to make it do this? And there is also a conspiracy theory according to which our Earth is really flat, and only a cabal of evil scientists has been convincing us for several centuries that it is spherical. Wait, what about satellite images and records from space? And they are falsified by the same scientists. But what about the poles? There is only one pole - the North one, it is in the center of the Earth, which is flat as a disk, and along the edges of the disk there are glaciers that scientists pass off as Antarctica. And so on - soon the seething stream of this nonsense will take you in a completely new direction.

2. AVOID STRESS

Some people find that a strong impression will help them cope with intrusive thoughts, such as a scandal with their neighbors or running naked through a winter city at night. However, studies show that the more you shake up your emotions, the weaker it is before the “alien invasion” of uninvited thoughts. On the contrary, try to calm down and rest - the more strength you have and the better your brain is, the more chances you have to repel an attack.

3. STOP THE BAD THOUGHTS

Deal with the obsessive thought - you will definitely pay attention to it, but only later. Include in your daily schedule "half an hour for painful thoughts" - but not before bedtime, but, for example, at the height of the working day. Thinking about what is bothering you during your lunch break will quickly take your mind off your problems and plunge back into work. Sooner or later, the subconscious mind will get used to the fact that obsessive thoughts have their own time with strictly defined limits, and will stop pestering you at other hours. Now you can think about how to exterminate annoying thoughts at this time.

4. FOCUS ON THE OBSESSION

Once upon a time, a patient came to the great physician Abu Ali ibn Sina, who complained that his eyelid was twitching. Ibn Sina prescribed him an extremely dubious remedy: every hour to begin to blink on purpose with an obstinate eyelid. The patient chuckled, but promised to strictly follow the prescribed. A few days later he came to thank the doctor. Like the remedy prescribed by Ibn Sina, this method works on the principle of "on the contrary": when an obsessive thought comes to you, try to force yourself to think it over from all sides, turn it this way and that, make yourself afraid that it will slip away from you - and you will soon feel that her grip is weakening and she herself would be glad to escape from you.

5. RECOGNIZE THE INEVITABILITY OF A BAD THOUGHT

Another way, somewhat similar to the previous one, is to replace the fear of the appearance of an unkillable thought with complete indifference to it. Learn to think of it as something external: for example, if it is the thought that a loved one left you, get used to the idea that this thought has nothing to do with him (or her), but exists on its own: here now I will go to bed, and my number one Thought will come to me again. Accustom yourself to the fact that this thought does not develop and does not tell you anything new - it just comes and goes, as twelve o'clock at night or winter come and go. And very soon you will feel that she is really leaving *.

6. MEDITATE

Meditation is a great way to organize your mind, bringing your thoughts under control. Practice it daily, trying to achieve a state of complete thoughtlessness. It is not easy, but if you learn how to do it, you will be able to induce this state at will, including it at the time of the day when you are most prone to bad thoughts, or in the situation when you become most defenseless against them.

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