Forms of control
The 10 Most Toxic Forms of Control in Relationships
Controlling people seek power overothers by reducing their partners confidence and stature.
Here are the 10 most toxic forms of control in relationships, with examples of each behavior:
1) Coercing
Trying to isolate you from others. Keeping financial or other resources out of your hands or sharing resources only after extracting a price from you. Trying to make you act against or give up your values. Fostering unhealthy triangles, for example keeping in contact with former lovers or putting you in the middle of conflicts between them and family members or friends.
2) Demeaning
Debasing you through ridicule or name-calling. Embarrassing you in front of others. Telling you that you are unattractive or unintelligent. Downplaying or ignoring your strengths and accomplishments. Making sarcastic comments.
3) Handicapping
Shaming or scapegoating you. Treating you as a child or as if you are not equal or capable. Telling you that you couldnt survive without the relationship. Violating your privacy. Excluding you from major decisions that affect you and the relationship.
7) Confusing
Gaslighting. Projecting, by accusing you of what they doing. Holding double standards that disfavor you. Claiming that you are the reason they act badly. Changing the subject or distracting you when you bring up an important topic.
5) Badgering
Pressuring or overwhelming you. Interrogating you about where you have been, what you are thinking or how you spend money or time. Demanding sex or affection regardless of how you feel. Refusing to take No for an answer.
6) Denying
Refusing to take responsibility. Minimizing or making excuses for their destructive behavior. Pretending that everything is fine.
7) Intimidating
Bullying you or going into a rage.
Threatening to harm you or others. Threatening to leave. Physically gesturing or posturing in intrusive or menacing ways.
8) Withholding
Refusing to communicate. Acting passive-aggressively. Refusing to do a fair share in chores, earning, or other responsibilities that affect you both. Withholding affection or sex. Giving you the silent treatment for hours or days. Refusing to answer your questions.
9) Deceiving
Lying. Cheating. False flattery. Pretending to be on your side. Telling you to just trust them. Forgetting to give you important messages.
10) Manipulating
Trying to make you feel guilty for your needs or desires. Threatening self-harm if you dont comply with their wishes. Being overly jealous or suspicious. Falsely accusing you of being dishonest.
Controlling people do not value treating others with respect or dignity. Rather,they seek power at your expense. They believe that their stature increases as your power and stature diminishes.
They know that:
If you recognize some of these signs of toxic control in an important relationship, you owe it to yourself to evaluate whether the relationship is right for you. You may wish to call attention to these behaviors and stand firm that they need to change.
If unhealthy controlling behaviors persist after you have called attention to them, the controlling person is giving you a message about his or her priorities. This may not be a healthy relationship for you.
Copyright Dan Neuharth PhD MFT
The 10 Most Toxic Forms of Control in Relationships
Controlling people seek power overothers by reducing their partners confidence and stature.
Here are the 10 most toxic forms of control in relationships, with examples of each behavior:
1) Coercing
Trying to isolate you from others. Keeping financial or other resources out of your hands or sharing resources only after extracting a price from you. Trying to make you act against or give up your values.
Fostering unhealthy triangles, for example keeping in contact with former lovers or putting you in the middle of conflicts between them and family members or friends.
2) Demeaning
Debasing you through ridicule or name-calling. Embarrassing you in front of others. Telling you that you are unattractive or unintelligent. Downplaying or ignoring your strengths and accomplishments. Making sarcastic comments.
3) Handicapping
Shaming or scapegoating you. Treating you as a child or as if you are not equal or capable. Telling you that you couldnt survive without the relationship. Violating your privacy. Excluding you from major decisions that affect you and the relationship.
7) Confusing
Gaslighting. Projecting, by accusing you of what they doing. Holding double standards that disfavor you. Claiming that you are the reason they act badly. Changing the subject or distracting you when you bring up an important topic.
5) Badgering
Pressuring or overwhelming you. Interrogating you about where you have been, what you are thinking or how you spend money or time. Demanding sex or affection regardless of how you feel. Refusing to take No for an answer.
6) Denying
Refusing to take responsibility. Minimizing or making excuses for their destructive behavior. Pretending that everything is fine.
7) Intimidating
Bullying you or going into a rage. Threatening to harm you or others. Threatening to leave. Physically gesturing or posturing in intrusive or menacing ways.
8) Withholding
Refusing to communicate. Acting passive-aggressively. Refusing to do a fair share in chores, earning, or other responsibilities that affect you both. Withholding affection or sex. Giving you the silent treatment for hours or days. Refusing to answer your questions.
9) Deceiving
Lying. Cheating.
False flattery. Pretending to be on your side. Telling you to just trust them. Forgetting to give you important messages.
10) Manipulating
Trying to make you feel guilty for your needs or desires. Threatening self-harm if you dont comply with their wishes. Being overly jealous or suspicious. Falsely accusing you of being dishonest.
Controlling people do not value treating others with respect or dignity. Rather,they seek power at your expense. They believe that their stature increases as your power and stature diminishes. They know that:
If you recognize some of these signs of toxic control in an important relationship, you owe it to yourself to evaluate whether the relationship is right for you. You may wish to call attention to these behaviors and stand firm that they need to change.
If unhealthy controlling behaviors persist after you have called attention to them, the controlling person is giving you a message about his or her priorities.
This may not be a healthy relationship for you.
Copyright Dan Neuharth PhD MFT
Methods, forms and types of control in the lesson according to GEF
The learning process is impossible without the control of knowledge and skills. The development of a control system is carried out not only by scientists - teachers who publish various manuals, but also by each teacher - a subject in particular. Modern requirements for training programs require the mandatory availability of control and measuring materials. Before compiling them, it is necessary to answer a number of questions:
- What are the functions of educational control?
- What kind, type and form of control would be appropriate in a particular topic?
- Which control method would be most appropriate for this lesson?
- What controls should be developed for class?
Learning control functions
Control, in simple terms, is a check of the compliance of the results obtained with the learning goals set in advance.
But its functions are not limited to checking the compliance of knowledge and competencies with the requirements of the educational standard. In modern didactics, the following functions are distinguished:
- Diagnostic . The teacher receives reliable information about gaps in knowledge of students, about frequently made mistakes and their nature. This helps to choose the most effective methods and means of training.
- Supervisory . As a result, the level of mastery of competencies and knowledge is established; the level of intellectual development of students.
- Training. Performing tasks and solving problems, students improve their knowledge and skills, applying them in new situations.
- Prognostic. Based on the results of the control, it is possible to understand whether the knowledge has been mastered enough and competencies have been formed in order to move on to new educational material.
- Developmental. Its essence lies in the development of speech, memory, attention, thinking, creative abilities of students, which occurs in the process of completing tasks.
- Orienting. Its essence is to identify the degree of knowledge of the topic.
- Educational. Periodic inspection contributes to the formation of a sense of responsibility, accuracy; discipline students.
By compiling control and measuring materials that perform the listed functions, the teacher will be able to increase the effectiveness of training several times.
A variety of types of control
The type of control in the lesson depends on the stage of learning. In this regard, allocate:
- Preliminary
- Current
- Thematic
- Final control
When moving to a new topic or section, the teacher needs to determine what knowledge and skills the student already has.
This is especially true in the fifth and tenth grades, as students arrive with varying degrees of preparedness. In addition, for example, in history lessons, the concentric system involves a repeated, but deeper, scientific study of almost all topics in the 10th grade. So here holding pre-control is particularly important. The value of this type of review is shown in identifying issues that need to be given increased attention.
One of the main conditions for the success of training is the constant detection of existing knowledge gaps for their timely elimination. This will help current control , which is basically part of the lesson.
Name « subject control » speaks for itself. It is held after studying a new topic or section, mainly in the lessons of control and correction of knowledge. The main goal is to prepare students for tests or final control.
At the end of the academic year and after the end of a certain stage of education (elementary, basic school) final control is carried out.
We can say that all previous types of checks are prepared for the main, final check. Based on its results, the degree of mastering the curriculum for a year or several years is determined.
Forms of control of knowledge and skills of students.
In school practice, five main forms of control are used:
- Frontal . The assignment is given to the whole class. Usually the guys give short answers from the spot.
- Group . The class is divided into groups. Each group is given a task to complete together.
- Individual . Each student has his own task, which must be completed without anyone's help. This form is suitable for clarifying the knowledge and abilities of an individual.
- Combined . This form of control combines the previous three.
Methods of control
Methods of control are methods that help to identify the degree of assimilation of knowledge and mastery of the required competencies.
Also, control methods allow you to evaluate the effectiveness of the teacher's work. The school uses such methods as oral survey, written work, tests, tests.
Oral questioning is one of the most common verification methods. It can be carried out both in individual and in frontal, and in combined forms. Let's consider their differences.
- Individual survey is carried out in order to determine the depth of knowledge acquisition by an individual, specific student. Usually he is called to the board and gives a detailed answer either to a general question with subsequent clarifications, or to a number of individual ones.
- Frontal survey involves several related questions asked by several students. Answers should be concise. The advantage of this method is the ability to interview several students at the same time and the obvious time savings. But there is also a significant drawback - the impossibility of checking the depth of knowledge.
In addition, the answers may be random. - Combined survey will be the "golden mean" when choosing between individual and frontal. One student gives a detailed answer, and several others perform individual tasks.
Written work can be offered in different forms, depending on the subject: dictations, compositions, reports, tests, tests, graphic works. Dictations can be used not only in Russian language lessons; they can be historical, geographical, mathematical and others. Also now they produce various printed notebooks for almost every subject.
Tests are recommended for use in senior classes. It is advisable to give students questions in advance.
In connection with the introduction of the Unified State Examination and the OGE, the test method has recently become very popular. It allows you to quickly test your knowledge on one or more topics. This method should not be used all the time as it cannot test creativity, students may respond at random; the test method does not allow the student to deeply analyze the topic.
Control types
Depending on who performs the control, they are divided:
- External control . Produced by the teacher on the activities of students.
- Mutual control . It is carried out by students on top of each other.
- Self-monitoring . The student checks himself using ready-made samples or correct answers.
It is advisable to combine different types rather than always using only one of them.
Controls
The teacher is faced with the difficult task of choosing the appropriate means of assessing knowledge and skills for the lesson. As mentioned above, one of the most common methods currently is test. A great variety of tests in all subjects are now being published. In addition, the teacher himself can compose test questions or entrust this task to students (of course, for a separate mark). Test questions can be:
- Multivariate .
In this case, the question is offered several answers, where only one or more will be correct. - Alternative . Two judgments or answers are offered, you need to choose the right one.
- Cross-selection questions . You need to find a match between the proposed options.
- Open . Answer options are available.
- Closed. You have to answer yourself. There are no options.
Questions must be precise, non-controversial, consistent with the curriculum and the material covered.
In addition to the tests, handouts can be used for the control. Now you can develop it yourself, buy it or download it from the Internet. These can be cards with questions, maps, diagrams, etc.
Homework is also one of the means of control. It can take different forms, but if it is completely absent or irregular, then the homework itself will simply depreciate.
Computer-based assessment tools are now very popular.
Their advantages: no need to waste material for compilation, quick check (carried out by a computer), students' interest is activated.
Requirements for control in training
Control will give the desired effect if it meets the following requirements:
- Systematic . You need to check your knowledge and skills regularly. Students should be aware that after each new topic there will be a test; homework is checked at every lesson, etc.
- Objectivity . Control should realistically assess the abilities and knowledge of students. Any personal relationships and preferences of the teacher are not relevant here. It is recommended to take into account not only the correct answer, but also the method of obtaining it: the course of reasoning, the method of solving the problem.
- Pedagogical tact . The essence of this requirement is to maintain a calm and businesslike atmosphere. Subject to this condition, students will not be afraid to answer questions, express their opinions.
- Time saving .
- Variety of control methods and forms used .
Control is a necessary link in any lesson. The effectiveness of training depends on its organization, conduct and evaluation.
IV. Procedure and forms of control over the performance of the state function \ ConsultantPlus
IV. Procedure and forms of control
over the performance of the state function
23. Current control over the performance of the state function of maintaining the Register is carried out in the form of regular monitoring of compliance by the responsible persons of Rossvyaz with the provisions of this Regulation and the current regulatory legal acts that establish requirements for the performance of the state function of maintaining the Register .
23.1. Current control is carried out by the head of the Department (the person replacing him) and the head of the structural unit.
23.2. In the course of current control, officials check:
compliance with the deadlines for the execution of administrative procedures;
sequence of execution of administrative procedures;
correct entry into the Register of information about the decisions made to allocate, change, withdraw or re-register the numbering resource;
relevance of information from the Register posted on the Site.
23.3. Based on the results of the current control, the responsible persons are given instructions to eliminate the identified violations and their elimination is monitored.
24. Scheduled inspections of the completeness and quality of performance of the state function of maintaining the Register are carried out quarterly.
24.1. Scheduled inspections are carried out by officials:
Deputy Head of Rossvyaz;
head of the Department (person replacing him).
24.2. In the course of scheduled inspections, officials check:
knowledge of the requirements of these Regulations and the current regulatory legal acts that establish requirements for the performance of the state function of maintaining the Register;
observance by responsible persons of terms and sequence of execution of administrative procedures;
availability and relevance of information from the Register posted on the Site;
correctness and timeliness of informing telecom operators on the procedures for performing the state function of maintaining the Register in accordance with received requests;
elimination of violations and deficiencies identified during the previous scheduled inspection.
24.3. Based on the results of a scheduled inspection, the inspectors are given instructions to the head of the structural unit to eliminate the identified violations and shortcomings.
25. Unscheduled inspections of the performance of the state function of maintaining the Register are carried out in the presence of complaints about the actions (inaction) of an official, as well as decisions made by him in the performance of the state function of maintaining the Register.
26. An official of Rossvyaz is responsible for decisions and actions (inaction) related to the performance of the state function of maintaining the Register, in accordance with the legislation of the Russian Federation.
27. In case of receiving information from telecom operators or other persons about discrepancy between the information posted on the Site, decisions on the allocation, change, withdrawal, reissuance of the numbering resource or the actually used numbering resource, the official of Rossvyaz must take measures to eliminate the comments.
