Best personality type for infj

5 Personality Types That Are Highly Compatible with INFJs

Any time I read an article about INFJs and relationships, it seems to repeat the same advice: our “ideal” match is the ENTP personality type. Then there is almost always a statement about how any two personality types can make a relationship work if they try hard enough. For instance, an INFJ can date any personality type–even an ESTP, our complete opposite–and it can be successful if the INFJ and their partner want the relationship to work.

Of course, this sentiment is true. INFJs can have happy relationships with any personality type. However, some types will probably be more compatible with INFJs than others. INFJs seek specific qualities from partners and friends. We value intelligence, honesty, authenticity, creativity, passion, and kindness. Of course, there are other qualities we look for, but that depends greatly on the individual INFJ.

This article is based on my own personal experience as an INFJ and the relationships I have formed with other Myers-Briggs personality types. This information may not apply to every INFJ, or the other personality types I have described below, but it is based on the patterns of behavior I have observed in my lifetime. I am hoping that through this article, I can provide a little insight into how INFJs feel about other personality types.

Should an INFJ Date an Extrovert?

Let’s begin with extroverts. Extroverts are exciting and stimulating to be around. INFJs are often mistaken for extroverts, as we are incredibly interested in people and forming relationships with them. Extroverts allow us the socialization that we crave and they push us outside of our comfort zone from time to time. Most of my closest relationships have been with extroverts, because we balance each other in a complementary way. I love that they are always willing to spend time with me. Some extroverted personality types are less social than others, and these are the ones I mesh with the best. They are social and talkative, but they also respect my need for quiet and calm environments.

In my experience as an INFJ, extroverted types that I get along well with include the following:

ENFP (“The Inspirer”)

The ENFPs I have known are full of life. What I love most about them is that they are truly free spirited. They bring out the aspects of my personality that are also free thinking, independent, and creative. Due to their magnificent intuitive abilities, ENFPs know when and how to approach more reserved personalities. They are sensitive to social situations and love connecting with all types of people. ENFPs make life a little brighter for everyone they encounter.

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ENFJ (“The Giver”)

Most of my closest friends are ENFJs. I’m not kidding. It’s like we are somehow magnetically drawn to each other. We are equally passionate and concerned about similar issues, but we go about our passions in different ways. ENFJs have, for lack of a better term, strong personalities. The ENFJs I have known are incredibly passionate people. INFJs have strong convictions, but those convictions are not on display for the world to see. I believe that ENFJs and INFJs get along well because we both care deeply and strive to make the world a better place.

Overall, I think extroverts make life exciting for INFJs. Some incredibly extroverted types may be taxing on an INFJ’s quiet nature, but those are the types we learn to enjoy in smaller doses. For all of you extroverts out there with an INFJ friend or loved one, please keep in mind that we value our solitude. We may require a lot more alone time than you can comprehend. It is best to give us our space and to not take it personally. We will come back to you when we’re ready and we will be energized for whatever adventure you have in mind.

Should an INFJ Date Another Introvert?

I think the most glaringly obvious advantage to having a relationship with an introvert is that they understand our need for solitude. It is comforting beyond words when another person understands your quiet moments and does not question you when you are lost in thought. I have befriended several introvert personality types in my lifetime. These are the friends that meet me at a coffee shop, or lounge around watching movies or reading all day. There is very little energy exerted when I am with other introverts. In fact, some of them give me more energy.

In my experience as an INFJ, other introverted types that I get along with well include the following:

INTJ (“The Scientist”)

Ah, the INTJ. There isn’t another introverted personality type that I am hopelessly drawn to more than this one. They are quick-witted, intelligent, and decisive. They do not let emotions stand in their way and rely on logic above all else. This is precisely how we are different and also why I value their personality so much. INFJs are known to get caught up in daydreaming, so it’s refreshing to be around a personality that is more grounded in logic. Some may view their lack of emotion to be cold or distant, but when viewed from a different perspective, they are actually very loving and thoughtful people.

INFP (“The Idealist”)

INFPs and INFJs may just have one letter different in their acronyms, but we are quite different personality types. The INFPs in my life can drive me a little up the wall with their lack of planning and punctuality (mundane tasks bore them), but all in all, I admire them. INFPs are bright and beautiful people to be around. Forever the ultimate idealists, they see things through rose-colored glasses. They remain optimistic and value harmony in their relationships. Just like an INFJ, INFPs can be difficult to get to know. They are reserved with their thoughts and feelings, but this does not mean that they do not care. They care deeply, especially about the people they are close to and the things they are passionate about. They are creative people with a depth of insight. I hope every INFJ gets to know at least one INFP in their lifetime. The INFPs that I know have changed my life.

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INTP (“The Logician”)

In the world of personality theory, the INTP and INFJ pairing has been nicknamed “The Golden Pair” because these two types can be highly compatible. Personally, I have only known one INTP (that I’m aware of). This person played a significant role in my life. When we met, we immediately felt comfortable together, and I felt understood for the first time in my life. Though the INTP focuses mostly on logic and the INFJ primarily on emotion, I would say these two types are a great match as they keep each other balanced. INTPs seek information at all times, and they are very much in their heads, like INFJs. The INFJ loves the INTP’s logical approach while the INTP appreciates the INFJ’s naturally mysterious disposition. INTPs can grow bored easily, but the INFJ’s willingness to communicate and question things keeps them intrigued.

And…

Honorary mention goes to other INFJs! We get along with one another almost seamlessly. I love meeting other INFJs. You inspire me.

Really, any two personality types can absolutely make a relationship work. I hope this overview of other Myers-Briggs types from an INFJ’s perspective shed some light on what we gravitate toward and how these other types impact an INFJ’s life. Want to learn more about INFJ relationships? Check out these great INFJ resources from our partner site.

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Read this: An Open Letter to Single INFJs

INFJ Relationships Guide - Compatibilities & Best Matches

To dive deeper into INFJ relationships, we need to know a little bit about the INFJ personality type. INFJ is the rarest type of the 16 Myers-Briggs personalities.

INFJs are caring introverts, people with an idealistic view of the world who act when needed and do what they consider essential. The acronym INFJ stands for the four cognitive functions – introverted, intuitive, feeling, and judging.

These functions define the way they observe and interact in relationships and with the world.INFJs are humanists by nature, and their prime motivation is to help anyone in need and help society in general.

No matter how idealistic this might sound, these are the people who act upon their intentions. INFJs appear warm and friendly on the surface, but their introverted nature hardly reveals what is going on in their mind.

And there’s a lot of thinking there, indeed! INFJs are people who intuitively comprehend the world and often see through what they are presented with. For INFJs, actions speak louder than words, and body language reveals what’s not said.

Nicknamed Counselors or Advocates, INFJs are incredibly insightful individuals with an increased need for personal integrity who rarely express their feelings and thoughts.

With just a small group of loyal friends, and a quest to find true love, INFJs would gladly hang out with their how-to-save-the-world thoughts than spending their time at group gatherings.

How Do INFJs Look at Dating and Falling in Love?

INFJs are anything but ordinary, and this refers to their love life too. While they dream of having a meaningful relationship that will fulfill their deeply hidden needs of ultimate body-mind-soul connection, their realities are paradoxically different.

To start with, INFJs are moralists with a high set of standards and values anchored within the core of their personality.

Since these principles guide every area of their lives, finding the best match for INFJ is like finding a needle in a haystack. So, what attracts them? What is it that they so desperately look for in other people?

First and utmost, INFJs have a dominant introverted intuitive function, which largely blocks their attempt to approach someone, even if their intuition tells them that the person might meet their strict criteria.

They would rather silently observe the person and try to get ‘clues’ of who she/he is, way before the communication starts.

Since they feel incredibly uncomfortable talking to people they don’t know or taking part in casual talks; they might pretend to be busy while looking for ‘signs’ that might signal a positive outcome.

INFJs and Dating

When the connection finally occurs, the partner of their choice must be someone who is at least at some point similar to their cravings to experience things deeply and mindfully.

However, INFJs dating looks like Indiana Jones in the unknown areas of an abandoned cave full of dangers lurking around.

They are equally careful not to step on a minefield (aka other person’s emotions) unless they are entirely sure they won’t hurt them. Yes, INFJs are empaths who put other people first!

During the dating phase, INFJs will try to learn as much as possible about the other person. This often goes beyond the presented information as they will try to find meaning in what’s not said and see if the person is equally interested in the relationship as they are.

Oftentimes they’ll confuse the dating partner with the famous INFJ stare. This phenomenon usually happens when they are deeply involved in contemplating something or analyzing the person in such a way that might even freak their partner out.

INFJs in Love

When it comes to INFJs’ emotions, there’s one more paradox that stands out. While they are excellent at recognizing and dealing with other people’s feelings, handling their own feelings is on the opposite end.

In many surveys and questionnaires, INFJs say that tackling their emotional issues feels as if they were separated from them and taken somewhere far away.

They don’t open up easily and leave the impression of being mysterious and inquiring. INFJs need lots of time and effort to get in-tune with their emotions and know exactly how they feel.

But once they do, i.e., when they genuinely fall in love, they are not shy to share their feelings. What they are mostly attracted to is authenticity, honesty, and open communication. Since they intuitively scan the person, they can quickly notice foul play or dishonesty.

As they progress in the relationship, they want their partner to share their personal growth desire, values, and need for personal space.

But for an INFJ to ultimately reach a honeymoon stage with their partner, they need deep emotional intimacy and an attentive partner who will be the one who listens to them.

INFJ Strengths in a Relationship

Understanding INFJ’s strengths and weaknesses can help them and their partners understand each other better and tackle issues much more efficiently.

Committed

INFJs take their relationships very seriously and dedicate much of their time to creating an exciting and affection-filled relationships.

Dedicated

INFJs are dedicated partners who strive to inspire their partners to reach their potential.

Excellent listeners

One of the Advocates’ most outstanding personality traits is their ability to grasp every word the other person says and act when needed.

Good communicators

Not only are they attentive when their partner is speaking, but they are excellent at their verbal skills.

Sensitive

If an INFJ’s partner is troubled over something, their INFJs soulmate will always offer a shoulder to cry on.

Able to face reality

Even though INFJs live for the future and often have big visions, facing the facts is not a big problem. This refers to relationship breakups as well.

INFJS Weaknesses in a Relationship

Reserved

Their partners usually have a hard time getting to know their INFJ partner’s real character as they tend to keep things for themselves only.

Financially disorganized

INFJs are terrible at managing finances and planning their daily budget.

Conflict avoiders

INFJs are peacekeepers, and they tend to avoid confrontations, which in relationships can lead to misunderstanding and piling up issues.

Not accepting criticism

While it is true that they are conflict avoiders, INFJs have almost zero patience if their values and principles are questioned and criticized. It is only then that the notorious INFJ door slam occurs.

Hard to change

Whoever tries to change an INFJ will probably face a solid rock that shows enormous resistance. The only change that will happen will likely be their communication.

INFJs Best Match for a Romantic Relationship

Choosing the best match for INFJ is generally a long-lasting process filled with many ups and downs. People consider them to be exceptionally picky, but that’s just because they never get involved in superfluous, shallow relationships.

What suits them most are personalities that share the same life values, principles, and expectations. Such are usually intuitive personality types who tend to be future-oriented, planners, and who make deep connections.

The extroverted feeling function is the one that makes INFJs such caring individuals who base their decisions on what they feel rather than what they see or hear.

Similar personalities will often encourage each other without questioning the decisions. However, these personalities (Ni and Fe) are not very into housekeeping and doing daily chores, so it might be challenging to arrange who’s going to take charge of doing them.

The relationship might become monotonous if the same activities occupy their attention while missing out on other valuable experiences.

Considering INFJ from the Myers-Briggs list of personalities perspective, the generally accepted ideal match is the ENTP personality.

In addition, ENFP is also a great match as it can inspire and stimulate INFJs, while ENFJ can support the humanist function of INFJs’.

Compatibility with Other Personality Types

Similar personalities offer the greatest perspectives of enjoying harmonious life if that’s what INFJs are after. However, opposites attract, so other MBTI personality types can also match with INFJs.

Take, for example, a person with a dominant extroverted function. Extroverts will surely get them out to the world and allow them to experience it in a much different way.

Dominant thinkers will introduce a sense where feelings take over and help them better deal with factual situations.

If an INFJ matches a person who sees things more practically, they can put together big ideas with practical solutions. Plus, such a combination can resolve issues related to daily chores, budget management, and necessary day-to-day practices.

Opposite personalities are likely to expose an INFJ to life experiences that will broaden their horizons and entice personal growth which is on the top on the INFJ preferences list.

But opposites can soon generate conflict, so an INFJ should think carefully if they’d like to be challenged with contrasting personalities or sail smoothly with someone similar to them.

INFJ as a Parent

INFJs are parents who raise their children to become caring people, independent, and with high moral values.

Learning and intellectual growth for them is a never-ending process, so they tend to direct their children to strive for the best they can get, provided it is morally right.

The high standards they set make them demanding and pushy at times. INFJs are devoted parents who shower their children with love and affection.

They consider them equal to adult family members and allow them to decide on things and speak their minds. They are always there for their children and often sacrifice their wellbeing to provide the maximum for them.

INFJs as Lovers

When INFJs love, then it is with their mind, body, and soul, and that’s the only way to achieve the ultimate connection with their partner.

They are never afraid to express their love to their partner and expect the same in return. INFJs often impress their partners with creative talents and melt their hearts with their astonishing verbal abilities.

Sex and intimacy are beyond corporal experience as they see it on a more spiritual level. Since they are empaths, they try to please their partners in every possible way.

They try hard to maintain harmony in the relationship and tend to avoid conflicts by all means.

INFJ as a Friend

The circle of very close INFJ friends is relatively limited and closed. Introverts as they are, INFJs don’t enjoy large social gatherings, and there are just a few friends with who they share their intimate thoughts with.

Those who share their friendship with INFJs are people from similar standpoints, background settings, and similar moral values.

INFJs appreciate when their friends acknowledge their need for solitude without grudging, and when they respect them for who they are.

INFJs never tolerate dishonesty, manipulations, and corruption, so in case they sense something like that, they withdraw and avoid the person.

INFJs are inspired by meaningful conversations and despise small talk. They don’t like taking part in confrontations either, or in case their moral values are criticized, they cut ties with the person for good.

INFJ and Breakups

Breakups are hard for INFJs, painful, and slow. When they decide to put an end, it usually has to do with dishonesty, lack of trust or intimacy, or infidelity.

When INFJs end a relationship, they experience emotional turmoil, which is not evident from the outside.

The biggest struggle they have is letting the person go, particularly if the attachment to the person was strong.

The initial response to the breakup in many cases would be putting aside their feelings since they don’t want to prioritize their personal issues.

If they continue to ignore them in the long run, stress and anxiety are likely to settle in. INFJs are advised to face the situation, go through it, and spend time with people they love and trust.

INFJ Relationships F.A.Q

Who Should an INFJ marry?

An INFJ should consider marrying an ENFP or ENTP. Both of these personality types place a high value on social life. This can help the INFJ gain confidence and social skills. They will also discover the more sociable side of themselves.

Additionally, ENFPs and ENTPs are both highly engaged in their relationships. They enjoy talking to their partners often and take commitment seriously (as do INFJs).

Who are attracted to INFJ?

Leaders and curious individuals tend to be most attracted to INFJs. This is so because the INFJ exudes an aura of mystery, and they are often misunderstood, for they are the rarest personality type.

As such, many ENTJs find themselves attracted to this personality type. ENTPs are also often attracted to INFJs for similar reasons,

Who is INFJ most compatible with?

The INFJ is most compatible with both the ENFJ and the ENTP. These two personality types can use their extroversion to bring out the best-hidden qualities of the INFJ.

They will become more confident and try new activities to push beyond their comfort zone. Additionally, these two types both place a similar value on commitment, which is crucial in a relationship.

Do two INFJs make a good couple?

Yes, two INFJs can make a great couple. They are unlikely to cheat on another because of their desire to stay committed. Also, these two individuals will be able to feel one another’s emotions deeply.

They will get a mutual understanding for one another’s goals and the goals of the relationship as a whole. The two will also explore culture and other intriguing concepts together.

Myers-Briggs Personality Type Compatibility: What kind of people are meant for each other

Love

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There are many ways to understand who you really are and what kind of people you will be most comfortable communicating with. Some people trust horoscopes and compatibility of zodiac signs, others rely on socionics, others trust only psychology. Any of the ways can be working if you do not perceive it as the only truth: the truth is always in the middle.

Among the various typologies, Myers-Briggs "characters" have recently gained popularity. This typology was developed by the writer Isabelle Briggs Myers and her mother Katerina Cooks Briggs, based on Jung's typology. Typology became especially popular in the 1940s and became a popular way in the United States and Europe to determine the professional and personal inclinations of a person.

Tests for this typology are currently included in the curriculum of many colleges, despite the fact that academic circles are wary of this classification. Psychologists and psychiatrists accept typology with many reservations and admit that it is more of a fun way to get to know yourself than a working principle worth living by.

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What types are

We talked about different types of personality in more detail in a separate article. In short, all people have four parameters on the basis of which the division is made: introversion / extraversion, sensory / intuition, thinking / feeling, decisions / perception.

Four parameters multiplied by 4 options - you get 16 different variations. To save time, we will not describe the features of each - it's all on the Internet. Here they are:

ESTJ: Administrator

ESFJ: Teacher

ENFJ: Mentor

ENTJ: Commander

👉 To understand what type you belong to, you need to pass the test - short or long -long.

What personality types converge best

The most optimal pairs are obtained from people who have two parameters that match, that is, two letters. This means that these people look at the world in the same way and perceive the surrounding reality. On the other hand, people with a complete match of characteristics will be bored together, and therefore at least 1-2 letters should be different.

ENFP

Description: An enthusiastic, creative and sociable mind who never gets bored.
Ideal couple: INFJ and INTJ

Ideal partners for this extroverted type are not the same extroverts at all. ENFP is a rather impulsive type, and therefore he needs someone down to earth and intuitive. In turn, the energy of the “fighters” will not let INFJs and INTJs get bored.

ISFJ

These people seem to be made for serious long-term relationships: they are responsible, loyal and carefully choose a life partner. Someone completely opposite, like a determined extrovert, will help you enjoy the facets of the relationship that are most dear to them - intimacy, loyalty and depth of feelings.

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ISFP

The most spontaneous and impulsive of all 16 types is not easy to deal with. In addition, they are also introverts, and therefore all the magic and fireworks of emotions take place inside them. Extroverts will help this type to get out of his "shell", and the ability to plan ahead will save the couple from sudden decisions.

ISTJ

"Administrator" believes only what he sees with his own eyes. An ideal partner will help him focus not only on facts, but also on his feelings. At the same time, both agree that intuition takes over.

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ISTP

"Virtuosi" do not seek to start a relationship, cherishing their freedom, but not against common adventures. They get bored easily, but they love making new friends - extroverts fully cover their need for communication. ISTPs are most compatible with ESFJs and ESTJs.

INFP

Description: Poetic, kind and altruistic people, always ready to help.
The perfect couple: ENFJ and ENTJ

"Intermediaries" feel more than they understand, and they need the same intuitions. On the other hand, ENFJs and ENTJs balance them by starting to prepare for problems in advance.

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INTJ

Perfectionists and rather cold people in life. They need someone more open, extroverted, but also someone who also relies on intuition and can nip problems in the bud.

INTP

"Scientists" rarely open up to anyone and generally do not like it when they climb into the soul. Intuitive extroverts will know when it's best to leave this type alone and when to help make a difficult decision.

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INFJ - Activist

Movie and TV characters: Dale Cooper (Twin Peaks), Edward Cullen (Twilight), Matt Murdock (Daredevil).

Guys with this personality type are looking for their one and only. For her, the Activist is ready for anything, including marriage, children, moving to a dream country, and going shopping on the weekend. Such people take romantic relationships extremely seriously, mostly planning them for a long period of time.

An activist is looking for his soulmate. It is important for them to have a rough connection and common interests with their partner. This personality type values honesty, love without barriers, and time spent with the person you love. In bed, they are attentive to the desires of the second half, each time giving all the best. An activist is a prince on a white horse that you read about in fairy tales 😉

ESTJ - Manager Robb Stark ("Game of Thrones").

If passion and love are equal to fun and adventure for you, then you definitely need a cool Manager 😍 This person knows that a couple needs not only to look into each other's eyes, but also to have a great time - otherwise why all this? This type of personality will give you not only hot nights, but also bright, joyful days, where there will always be someone you can rely on!

What is especially cool is that even the longest relationship with the Manager will never get boring. Couples where there is a partner with this type of personality always cause envy among others. The manager is an almost perfect boyfriend, but as a lover, he is completely unique!

ESFJ Consul

Movie and TV characters: Cedric Diggory (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire), Troy Bolton (School Musical), Dean Winchester (Supernatural).

It takes a lot of effort to find such a cool partner! Consulars are naturally supportive and motivated, and they are extremely empathetic. Forgive me for taking such liberties, but this type is perfect for the role of your “first” 😏 You will definitely not feel awkward with him!

This personality type is known for starting relationships with great enthusiasm and great faith in a common future. He gradually and carefully builds the foundation of strong love, if his partner is really important and dear to him. Of course, the Consul is a little Don Juan, but the right person decides everything here. If you really managed to conquer this guy, then he will do everything for you!

INTJ - Strategist

Heroes of movies and TV series: Stephen Strange ("Doctor Strange"), Severus Snape ("Harry Potter"), Victor ("Arcane").

Who can resist a guy who knows what he wants and gets it? Yes, this is how you can describe the vibe of the Strategist. They perfectly represent the plan of their actions to win the heart, so much so that you will be amazed at its details. Of course, short-lived romances are pleasant to them, but if you turned out to be special, you will be amazed at how tenaciously they will seek your location.

Like the Activist, the Strategist believes in the connection between soulmates and destiny. For them, there is nothing more important than having a strong and satisfying relationship for both partners. For his part, he will do everything for this, but will demand the same in return. In bed, the Strategist will show new sides of himself every time, so fasten your seat belts and go ahead, fortunately!

ENFP — Wrestler

Movie and TV characters: 10th Doctor (Doctor Who), Professor (Paper House), Paul Atreides (Dune).

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