Ball of grief
The Ball and Box Analogy on Coping with Grief
Grief is a unique emotion that we all experience. Even if it doesn’t feel like it, it isn’t permanent. It’s like a shrinking ball in a box.
How you navigate grief may depend on many factors — including the emotional tools you have available or the significance of your loss. Your feelings are valid and natural in every case.
That pain may stay with you for the rest of your life, but it’ll likely change over time. That’s the nature of grieving.
In many instances, grief may feel like a bouncing ball in a box with a pain button. Such is the analogy described by Lauren Herschel to explain why grief can hurt so much.
Following Herschel’s analogy, let’s picture your life as a closed box, your grief as a bouncing ball, and pain as a button inside the box.
When you’re first faced with a loss, grief may feel heavy and large, filling out every corner of your life.
Because it’s so present, it’s difficult to ignore or handle. Even if not on purpose, every little step you take may cause the bouncing ball to move and hit the pain button.
You may try to adjust at first. You might take some time for yourself or withdraw from people. Perhaps you try to keep busy to distract your thoughts from the loss.
But because grief is like a bouncing ball, even if you handle it with care, it may still hit the walls of your life and eventually that pain button that sounds the alarm.
How you express that pain may look differently from how someone else does. Maybe you become angry and irritable; possibly, you cry a lot. You may even feel empty or numb, without expressing much at all.
These are all natural expressions of grief.
It may feel like your pain is never going to end and that the huge ball leaves no room for anything else in your life.
You may have a hard time picturing your future without that person, or even finding purpose in moving on.
But that ball that currently feels so large and present has a tiny escape valve.
It’ll eventually start losing air.
Share on PinterestIllustration by Bailey Mariner
As time goes on, you may experience grief as a smaller ball. It may no longer get in the way of every other aspect of your life.
Maybe you’re able to go back to work, or tend to yourself and others more efficiently. You may have days when you smile and feel like your “old self.”
But grief is still a bouncing ball. So, from time to time, it may bounce off the box walls and hit the pain button again.
This could take you by surprise, or you may even still move smoothly in life, anticipating the grief ball hitting the button.
There’s no deadline on grieving. This may happen a few weeks after your loss, or even after years have gone by.
And even if the grief ball is smaller, the pain button still delivers the same amount of pain when it gets hit.
You’ve gone back to some old routines, but the loss is still present — and it hurts when you’re confronted by the reality of it.
Share on PinterestIllustration by Bailey Mariner
Even if it didn’t feel like it at first, the grief ball will eventually become minuscule.
The void of your loss is still there, but the space the grief ball used to fill in the box is now occupied by the memories and lessons that person left you.
Love perseveres and serves as a cushion that, more often than not, prevents the ball from hitting the pain button.
The grief ball may still get to it sometimes, and you feel some pain return. But this may be a rare occurrence now.
This is what some people call acceptance.
It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re OK with your loss. It’s valid if you don’t ever feel this way.
You may always miss that person and what they meant in your life. Perhaps you long for their company during important or milestone moments.
This is all natural. It’s also part of the acceptance process to know you still love and need them, but they’re gone.
At some point, you’ve learned to live with the reality of this.
You may have adjusted your life in such a way that other shapes and textures are now filling the box, reducing the chance the grief ball bounces around as much.
Even if it doesn’t feel like it at first, grieving pain decreases with time. It’s like a ball with an escape valve.
This doesn’t mean you have forgotten about your loss or that you care less about it. Instead, healing has taken place and you can acknowledge the loss — but also feel gratitude for what that person meant.
This grieving process is unique to you. There’s no correct or wrong way to do it.
But if you feel you’re having a difficult time, or you’re experiencing prolonged grief, it may be a good idea to reach out for help.
An experienced mental health professional can support you in this difficult time. They can help you develop tools that allow you to shrink the ball and fill the spaces in between.
Remember, you’re doing the best you can with the resources at hand. There’s nothing wrong or uncommon about needing additional support when facing a loss.
Eventually, the bouncing grief ball in a box will start to lose air, and much of its power when it hits the pain button will also go away.
Coping with grief is possible. You can do this.
The Ball and Box Analogy on Coping with Grief
Grief is a unique emotion that we all experience. Even if it doesn’t feel like it, it isn’t permanent. It’s like a shrinking ball in a box.
How you navigate grief may depend on many factors — including the emotional tools you have available or the significance of your loss. Your feelings are valid and natural in every case.
That pain may stay with you for the rest of your life, but it’ll likely change over time. That’s the nature of grieving.
In many instances, grief may feel like a bouncing ball in a box with a pain button. Such is the analogy described by Lauren Herschel to explain why grief can hurt so much.
Following Herschel’s analogy, let’s picture your life as a closed box, your grief as a bouncing ball, and pain as a button inside the box.
When you’re first faced with a loss, grief may feel heavy and large, filling out every corner of your life.
Because it’s so present, it’s difficult to ignore or handle. Even if not on purpose, every little step you take may cause the bouncing ball to move and hit the pain button.
You may try to adjust at first. You might take some time for yourself or withdraw from people. Perhaps you try to keep busy to distract your thoughts from the loss.
But because grief is like a bouncing ball, even if you handle it with care, it may still hit the walls of your life and eventually that pain button that sounds the alarm.
How you express that pain may look differently from how someone else does. Maybe you become angry and irritable; possibly, you cry a lot. You may even feel empty or numb, without expressing much at all.
These are all natural expressions of grief.
It may feel like your pain is never going to end and that the huge ball leaves no room for anything else in your life.
You may have a hard time picturing your future without that person, or even finding purpose in moving on.
But that ball that currently feels so large and present has a tiny escape valve. It’ll eventually start losing air.
Share on PinterestIllustration by Bailey Mariner
As time goes on, you may experience grief as a smaller ball. It may no longer get in the way of every other aspect of your life.
Maybe you’re able to go back to work, or tend to yourself and others more efficiently. You may have days when you smile and feel like your “old self.”
But grief is still a bouncing ball. So, from time to time, it may bounce off the box walls and hit the pain button again.
This could take you by surprise, or you may even still move smoothly in life, anticipating the grief ball hitting the button.
There’s no deadline on grieving. This may happen a few weeks after your loss, or even after years have gone by.
And even if the grief ball is smaller, the pain button still delivers the same amount of pain when it gets hit.
You’ve gone back to some old routines, but the loss is still present — and it hurts when you’re confronted by the reality of it.
Share on PinterestIllustration by Bailey Mariner
Even if it didn’t feel like it at first, the grief ball will eventually become minuscule.
The void of your loss is still there, but the space the grief ball used to fill in the box is now occupied by the memories and lessons that person left you.
Love perseveres and serves as a cushion that, more often than not, prevents the ball from hitting the pain button.
The grief ball may still get to it sometimes, and you feel some pain return. But this may be a rare occurrence now.
This is what some people call acceptance.
It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re OK with your loss. It’s valid if you don’t ever feel this way.
You may always miss that person and what they meant in your life. Perhaps you long for their company during important or milestone moments.
This is all natural. It’s also part of the acceptance process to know you still love and need them, but they’re gone.
At some point, you’ve learned to live with the reality of this.
You may have adjusted your life in such a way that other shapes and textures are now filling the box, reducing the chance the grief ball bounces around as much.
Even if it doesn’t feel like it at first, grieving pain decreases with time. It’s like a ball with an escape valve.
This doesn’t mean you have forgotten about your loss or that you care less about it. Instead, healing has taken place and you can acknowledge the loss — but also feel gratitude for what that person meant.
This grieving process is unique to you. There’s no correct or wrong way to do it.
But if you feel you’re having a difficult time, or you’re experiencing prolonged grief, it may be a good idea to reach out for help.
An experienced mental health professional can support you in this difficult time.
They can help you develop tools that allow you to shrink the ball and fill the spaces in between.
Remember, you’re doing the best you can with the resources at hand. There’s nothing wrong or uncommon about needing additional support when facing a loss.
Eventually, the bouncing grief ball in a box will start to lose air, and much of its power when it hits the pain button will also go away.
Coping with grief is possible. You can do this.
Residents of the Tarumovsky District released white balloons into the sky as a sign of mourning | News of Makhachkala
TARUMOVSKY DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". Residents of the Tarumovsky district took the trouble in Kemerovo with pain and indifference, the press service of the municipality told the news agency. From the very morning of March 28, mourning music sounded over the Central Square in the regional center. Pedagogical teams of the district schools, health care, employees of the central library and others honored the memory of the dead with a minute of silence.
The working meeting in the administration of the Tarumovsky district also began with a moment of silence.
During the day, residents of the district carried toys and fresh flowers to the improvised pedestal, and at 6 pm employees of the district administration, all organizations of the district, public organizations, residents of the district center, among whom there were many young people, came to the Central Square.
Speaking about the tragedy in Kemerovo, the secretary of the Tarumovo local branch of the United Russia party, the head of the district, Alexander Zimin, expressed condolences to the families and friends of those killed in Kemerovo, and wished recovery to the victims. " It is impossible to find words that would convey our common pain. The tragedy claimed the lives of adults and children. We all need to be united and strong in the difficult moments of grief ,” he said.
Poem "Forgive us, angels!" read by the director of the Tarumov Information Center Lesya Prokopenko.
After a moment of silence, flowers were laid, and hundreds of white balloons flew into the sky.
below is the date when the material was published on the site of the original source!
In St. Petersburg, Dagestanis honored the memory of those killed in a fire in Kemerovo
On March 28, employees of the Representative Office of the Republic of Dagestan in St. Petersburg visited a temporary memorial located in the House of Nationalities, dedicated to the victims of a fire in Kemerovo in the Winter Cherry shopping center.
17:51 29.03.2018 Ministry of National Policy - Makhachkala
A mourning action in memory of the victims of the fire in Kemerovo was held in the Suleiman-Stalsky district. In the Suleiman-Stalsky district on the square in front of the Palace of Culture.
17:34 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
The memory of the victims of the fire in Kemerovo was honored in the Republican Youth Sports School
A rally in memory of the people who died in the fire at the Zimnyaya Cherry shopping center in Kemerovo was held at the Polytech RDYuSSh stadium of the Ministry of Education and Science of Dagestan.
16:09 03/29/2018 Ministry of Education and Science - Makhachkala
Residents of the Kaytagsky district paid tribute to the victims of the fire in Kemerovo
KAYTAG DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". On March 28, at the initiative of specialists from the Center for Traditional Culture of the Peoples of Russia, an action-rally was held in the Kaytagsky district in memory of the victims,
15:38 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
Meeting-requiem in memory of those who died during the fire in the Kemerovo shopping center "Zimnaya Vishnya", Kemerovo shopping center "Winter Cherry" to pay tribute to the dead.
15:02 29.03.2018 Branch of DSU - Derbent
Meeting with the winners of the participants of the Regional Olympiad
March 28, director of the Derbent branch of Derbent Ph.D., associate professor Abdulkerimov I.Z.
15:02 29.03.2018 Branch of DSU - Derbent
Kaspiysk supported the All-Russian action of mourning
On March 28, residents of Kaspiysk expressed their grief for those who died in the fire on 03/25/2018, in the city of Kemerovo.
14:01 29.03.2018 United Russia - Makhachkala
Kazbekovsky district supported the All-Russian action of grief
KAZBEKOVSKY DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". March 28 was declared a day of national mourning in connection with the tragic events that took place in the city of Kemerovo.
12:34 29.03.2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
Kizilyurt honored the memory of those killed in Kemerovo
KIZLYURT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan".
On the day of national mourning, March 28, residents of the city of Kizilyurt honored the memory of the innocent victims of the fire in Kemerovo, the press service of the municipality told the news agency.
12:34 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
A mourning meeting was held in Tabasaransky district in memory of those killed in Kemerovo
TABASARANSKY DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". On March 28, a mourning meeting dedicated to the memory of those killed in the Kemerovo fire took place in the village of Khuchni, Tabasaransky District, the press service of the municipality told the news agency.
11:36 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
Hundreds of residents of Yuzhno-Sukhokumsk came to honor the memory of those killed in Kemerovo
YUZHNO-SUKHOKUMSK, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". On March 28, residents of Yuzhno-Sukhokumsk took part in a rally in memory of those killed in the Kemerovo tragedy, the press service of the municipality told the news agency.
11:35 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
FUNERAL RALLY
On March 28, the chairman of the City Assembly of Deputies Mavsum Rahimov, deputies of the Assembly, deputies of the Youth Parliament took part in a funeral rally in memory of those killed in a fire in Kemerovo,
11:32 03/29/2018 city of Derbent - Derbent
A funeral meeting was held in the Buynaksky district
BUINAKSKY DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". On March 28, dozens of workers and residents of the municipality gathered in the courtyard of the administration of the Buynaksky district, who paid tribute to the memory of those killed in the terrible tragedy in Kemerovo.
10:35 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
Residents of the Tarumovsky district released white balloons into the sky as a sign of mourning
TARUMOVSKY DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". Residents of the Tarumovsky district took the trouble in Kemerovo with pain and indifference, the press service of the municipality told the news agency.
10:35 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
A meeting-requiem was held in Derbent in memory of those killed in the fire in Kemerovo
DERBENT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan". A requiem rally in memory of those killed in a fire in a Kemerovo shopping center was held in Derbent's Military Glory Park the day before, the press service of the municipality told the news agency.
10:35 03/29/2018 RIA Dagestan - Makhachkala
We are with you, we mourn! Dagestan, like the whole country, was shocked by the tragedy in Kemerovo
In every point of the republic, dozens of people took to the streets of their cities and regions to honor the memory of all those killed in the Kemerovo tragedy.
10:23 03/29/2018 PFRF - Makhachkala
Tarumovsky district honored the memory of the victims of the tragedy in Kemerovo
The tragedy in Kemerovo shook the whole of Russia.
By decree of the President of the Russian Federation Vladimir Putin, March 28, 2018 was declared a day of mourning in the Russian Federation in connection with the death of people as a result of a fire.
10:02 03/29/2018 United Russia - Makhachkala
Kemerovo, we are with you!
On March 28, residents of Kaspiysk expressed their grief for those who died in the fire on March 25, 2018, in the city of Kemerovo.
09:53 03/29/2018 Administration of Kaspiysk - Kaspiysk
On March 28, rallies were held in Buynaksk in support of Kemerovo residents who died in a terrible fire that occurred in the Zimnyaya Vishnya shopping center
On March 27 of this year, Russian President Vladimir Putin signed a Decree declaring a nationwide mourning on March 28 in connection with the tragedy in Kemerovo.
09:41 29.03.2018 Municipality of Buynaksk - Buynaksk
Residents of southern Russia supported the action #locked after the tragedy in Kemerovo
The national day of mourning in connection with the fire in the Kemerovo shopping center "Winter Cherry", where more than 60 people died, was announced too late, activists say.
04:22 03/29/2018 Caucasian knot - Makhachkala
RIA Dagestan TARUMOVSKY DISTRICT, March 30 - RIA "Dagestan". Today in the Tarumovsky district a district clean-up day was held, the press service of the municipality told the news agency.
RIA Dagestan Administration of Makhachkala KIZILURTOVSKY DISTRICT, March 29 - RIA "Dagestan".
RIA Dagestan Government of the Republic of Dagestan Newspaper Budni Buynaksk Kizilyurtovsky district Newspaper of Zori Tabasaran Sergey Melikov met with Deputy Prime Minister of Russia Dmitry Chernyshenko.
Newspaper of Zori Tabasaran Zaman's newspaper Meetings with the families of the mobilized Rutulsky district. Yesterday, the editor-in-chief of the Republican newspaper "Nur" Abdullayev Bayram Safarovich met with the father of two mobilized sons, Abbas Suleymanov.
Rutulsky district The police are investigating the circumstances of household gas explosion in the Magaramkent region, the press service of the regional Ministry of Internal Affairs informs.
Zaman's newspaper in the autumn-winter period With the onset of cold weather, the population begins to actively use electrical and heat generating devices.
Online publication Caspian-Media Investigators have initiated a criminal case against a 36-year-old man from the village of Oruzba, Magaramkent district, in whose house a gas-air mixture popped, the press service of the Investigative Committee for the region informs.
Zaman's newspaper The most valuable thing we have is life. The life and health of children is a special value, and no one has the right to encroach on it.
Magaramkent district On October 27, the head of the Akushinsky district, Makhach Abdulkerimov, met with the head physician of the Akushinsky Central District Hospital, Zalkip Aliyev.
Akushinsky district I express my gratitude and sincere gratitude to the staff of the Republican Clinical Hospital No. 2, and especially Bekeyeva Sakinat Bekeyevna, the emergency room nurse.
Newspaper Dagestan Life In a difficult period for the country, we are increasingly drawing parallels between historical and modern events.
Vesti Agula Sergey Melikov met with Deputy Prime Minister of Russia Dmitry Chernyshenko.
Newspaper of Zori Tabasaran Today, when Russia and its Armed Forces are celebrating the 300th anniversary of the Red Banner Caspian Flotilla, we, sailors-members of the Buynaksk City Sailors Club, want to congratulate all who have ever served in the Caspian Sea, people,
Newspaper Dagestan Life
June 20, 2018 - All news - News of Murmansk and Murmansk region
June 20, 2018 - All news - News of Murmansk and the Murmansk region - News agency Nord-NewsNews for June 20, 2018
Waste paper collection campaign starts in Murmansk on June 23
Murmansk Puppet Theater took the Grand Prix of the International Festival "Tararam"
How will the tariffs for "communal" for residents of Apatity
A teenager from Monchegorsk was convicted of amphetamine
"Polar Venice": Apatity flooded after a rainstorm [video]
"KolAtomEnergoSbyt" reminds northerners of the transfer of testimony in June
The head of Murmansk met with the director of the short film that won Starcon
200m Braemar cruise ship will arrive tomorrow in Murmansk
The intervention of the prosecutor's office helped pay off the debts of polar hospitals
Northern Fleet exercises: Paratroopers withstood defenses in the Barents Sea
TNT grew a mustache and again congratulated the national team with victorious videos
In 20 years, the natural park "Kutsa" will appear in the Kandalaksha region
Minister of Education of the Murmansk Region Natalia Karpenko resigns
Tele2 offered Murmansk entrepreneurs new tariffs
The murderer of a drinking buddy from Murmashi was sentenced to 13 years in prison
The government of the Murmansk region will discuss the resettlement of emergency houses
Icebreaker Kapitan Dranitsyn
returned to Murmansk from a 50-day voyageGreat Wall was evacuated from a garage in Kirovsk
Heavy rain is expected today in the Murmansk region
On Youth Day in Murmansk, the central streets will be blocked
Military pensioners were allowed to carry weapons
The program of events for the Youth Day in Murmansk has been published
In the village of Abram-Mys, the bus flew into a ditch
By August 2019, a new boiler house
will appear in MurmanskA new attraction will appear in Kandalaksha - milestone
Giant butterflies appeared at Five Corners in Murmansk
The Murmansk prosecutor's office is interested in the child from the apartment where the dog was slaughtered
On the Day of Memory and Sorrow in Murmansk, balloons will be released into the sky
Scheduled outages in Murmansk June 20
It's getting a little cooler in the Murmansk region: up to +19° and rain
: 13 Murmurmanska looking for recipients of the lost postcard of 1977
14: 04 Murmarman residents invite souvenirs for Honorary Donors
13: 03 Right Readiness,
13: 02 -minute northerners are invited to a tale of
12: 04 Excurs.
