3 year old personality type


What is Your Toddler's Personality Type?

WHAT IS YOUR TODDLER’S PERSONALITY TYPE?

“If babies are angels, then toddlers must be cavemen.”

My neighbor says that a lot on those bad days.

“I just wish I could have prepared myself better for the attack of the Flintstones,” she whines while telling me that her 3- and 4 year-olds are uncivilized, oblivious to danger and totally egocentric. “They shove toy trucks and puzzle parts in their noses. They eat light bulbs.”

Toddlers are full of surprises. But parents can master understanding these little creatures. The first step: Figure out your toddler’s personality. Knowing your child’s temperament helps you know when to pamper and when to push.

Generally, toddler personality is divided into three broad categories, experts say:

  • Easy or happy, but not constantly.
  • Shy or slow to warm — often thoughtful and quiet.
  • Spirited (a nice term for “Get down off the refrigerator right now!”)

The Easy Child: About half of kids are easygoing — waking up “on the right side of the bed,” cheerful and ready for a new day. They’re active, tolerate change, and basically like new people and situations. Parents need to just use common sense if this is their toddler’s personality. Easy children sometimes can be lost in the crowd — spending too much time left alone with the television, or not enough time with their parents because other children demand the attention. Make sure that a child who is easy doesn’t become a neglected child.

The Shy Child: About 15 percent of kids are shy or slow to warm up, experts say. By age 9 months, many easy babies will smile at strangers, but shy kids will frown and cling. Experts say children with this toddler personality type need a lot of transition time from one activity to another activity. They might be late walkers and they will often study, with intensity, how a game is played before jumping in. Their motto is, “When in doubt, don’t!” Parents, these are gentle souls — and should be shielded from harsh criticism and ridicule. Also, parents need to make sure children with this toddler personality type aren’t rushed into getting dressed or sitting on Santa’s lap.

The Spirited or Wild Child: About one in 10 toddlers is a strong-willed, challenging kid, experts say. These roller-coaster kids have high highs and low lows. Parents usually know they have a spirited child because they’re the ‘more’ kids.” More active. More impatient. More impulsive. More defiant. More intense. More sensitive. More rigid. The best recommendation to parents with this toddler personality type: Keep them active. Get them outside to play — a lot. These kids need to burn off their energy and work through their moods, experts say. They also need firm structure to keep them safe and stable — and lots of patience.

Of course, no child is contained within one toddler personality type, but these three types can be a helpful guide on how to interact. And I must add that on the good days my neighbor calls her toddlers little darlings and she tells me all of the impressive and sweet things they are doing.

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Toddler Personality Types and Effective Parenting

Whether your tot’s easy, shy, or a certifiable wild child, work with what you've got and reap the happiness.

Written by Diane Lore

Rambunctious, mobile, and caught in a riptide of emotion, toddlers are the uncivilized, pedal-to-the-metal humans, matched only by the older edition called teenagers, experts (and parents) say.

Pediatrician Harvey Karp, author and creator of The Happiest Toddler on the Block, says if babies are angels, then toddlers are cavemen.

Lara Zibners, an emergency room pediatrician in New York, says, "They eat light bulbs. They shove Legos in their noses. Toddlers are egocentric, emotionally labile, indecisive, and oblivious to danger." Layer in their limited ability to communicate and their individual temperaments, and Zibners, author of If Your Kid Eats This Book, Everything Will Still Be Okay, says, "It's no wonder that many parents can't wait for their child to outgrow this difficult, yet often delightful, phase of childhood."

Yet parents aren't as helpless as they may sometimes feel. They can master understanding these little creatures. The first step is to figure out your toddler's personality. In The Happiest Toddler on the Block, Karp writes: "Temperament explains why some of us can sleep with the TV on while others go nuts with the tiniest noise, why some forgive easily and others just can't let go. Knowing your child's temperament helps you know when to pamper and when to push."

Toddler Personality Types

Experts say there are three broad categories of toddler personality:

  • Easy or happy, but not full-tilt constantly
  • Shy or slow to warm -- often thoughtful and quiet
  • Spirited (a nice term for "Get down off the refrigerator right now!")

The Easy Child: About half of all kids are easygoing -- waking up on the "right side of the bed," cheerful and ready for a new day, Karp says. They're active, tolerate change, and basically like new people and situations. They don't anger easily, according to the experts, but they aren't pushovers either.

Parents need to just use common sense if this is their toddler's personality -- with a couple of caveats. Easy children sometimes can be lost in the crowd, spending too much time left alone with the television or not enough time with their parents because other children demand the attention. Make sure that a child who is easy doesn't become a neglected child.

The Shy Child: About 15% of kids are shy or slow to warm up. By 9 months, many easy babies will smile at strangers. But shy kids will frown and cling. They'll wave bye-bye only after a guest leaves.

Children with this toddler personality are often extra-sensitive to the feel of their clothing or the temperature in a room. They need a lot of transition time from activity to activity and resist change. They might be late walkers and they will often study, with intensity, how a game is played before jumping in. Karp says, "Their motto is, 'When in doubt, don't!'"

These are gentle souls and should be shielded from harsh criticism and ridicule. Rejection can make a shy child fearful and brittle throughout life. Also, parents need to make sure children with this toddler personality have the stability and the time to process the curve balls of life; they can't be rushed into getting dressed or to sit on Santa's lap.

The Spirited (Wild) Child: About one in 10 toddlers is a strong-willed, challenging kid. "These roller-coaster kids have high highs and low lows," Karp says. "Parents usually know they have a spirited child because they're the 'more' kids." More active. More impatient. More impulsive. More defiant. More intense. More sensitive. More rigid."

The No. 1 recommendation to parents of children with this toddler personality is to keep them active. Get them outside to play -- a lot. These kids need to burn off their energy and work through their moods. They also need firm structure to keep them safe and stable -- and lots of patience.

Every Child Is Unique

Of course, no child is defined by just one toddler personality type. But these three types can serve as a guide on how to interact.

"Pay attention and pick up the nuance of your child," Karp says. "Kids are like flowers, each one is different, but special. So whether your child is a playful poppy or a shrinking violet, love and celebrate your child for his or her uniqueness. "

Stages of psychosexual development of a child. Oral stage | e1.ru

In modern psychology, there are many approaches to considering the stages of personality development. The purpose of all these theories is to determine what moments in the development of the child will predetermine his behavior, interests, life motives in adulthood. The approach that I am considering today is called psychoanalytic. Why exactly him? The fact is that psychoanalysis is a kind of 'cradle' of many psychological teachings. Freud's followers were such famous scientists as Adler, Jung, and many others. Each of them brought something of their own to science, but they all began their activities precisely with psychoanalysis, and today it is one of the most proven and proven theories.

To begin with, our behavior is largely unconscious to us. For the most part, this is the experience that we received in early childhood or even infancy, reacting to some kind of irritants or stressful situations. This experience was included in the system of our responses and we continue to use it all our lives. And if we take into account that the first experience has the strongest emotional coloring, it becomes clear why this feeling continues to guide us at critical moments in our lives.

How are these types of responses initiated? Freud identified 5 stages of psychosexual personality development.

  • Oral (0-18 months)
  • Anal (18 months-3 years)
  • Phallic (3 years-6 years)
  • Latent (6-12 years)
  • Genital (puberty10)

Today we will talk about the oral stage of psychosexual development.

During this period (from birth to one and a half years) the survival of the infant depends entirely on who cares for him, and the mouth area is most closely associated with the satisfaction of biological needs and pleasant sensations. The main task facing the infant during the oral-dependent period is to lay the foundation for basic attitudes: dependence, independence, trust and support in relation to other people. Initially, the child is not able to distinguish his own body from the mother's breast, and this gives him the opportunity to feel tenderness and love towards himself. But over time, the breast will be replaced by a part of its own body: the child will suck his finger or tongue to relieve the tension caused by the lack of motherly care. Therefore, it is so important not to interrupt breastfeeding if the mother is able to feed him herself. Behavior fixation at this stage can occur for two reasons:

  1. Frustration or blocking of the child's needs.
  2. Super-caring - the child is given many opportunities to manage his own internal functions.

As a result, the child develops a sense of dependence and incompetence. Subsequently, in adulthood, fixation at this stage may be expressed in the form of 'residual' behavior. An adult in a situation of severe stress can regress and this will be accompanied by tears, thumb sucking, a desire to drink. The oral stage ends when breastfeeding stops and this deprives the child of the corresponding pleasure. Freud postulated that a child who was overstimulated or understimulated in infancy was more likely to develop an oral-passive personality type later on.

Its main features are: it expects a 'maternal' attitude towards itself from the outside world, it constantly requires approval, it is overly dependent and trusting, it needs support and acceptance, life passivity. During the second half of the first year of life, the second phase of the oral stage begins - oral-aggressive. The infant is now developing teeth, making biting and chewing an important means of expressing the frustration caused by the absence of the mother or the delay in gratification. Fixation at the oral-aggressive stage is expressed in adults in such traits as love for disputes, pessimism, sarcasm, and a cynical attitude towards everything around. People with this type of character tend to exploit and dominate other people in order to satisfy their own needs.

Next time we will continue our consideration of the psychosexual stages proposed by S. Freud and move on to the anal stage.

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    Stages of a child's psychosexual development. Anal Stage

Tatyana Andreeva

Practitioner psychologist

Freidpsychology of children

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    1.2.1 Stages of personality development according to Freud

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    2. Freud's concept > ‎

    1.2.1 Stages of personality development according to Freud

    Oral stage of development

    baby in this period is the mouth. It is with the help of his mouth that he not only feeds, but also learns the world around, experiences a lot of pleasant sensations. This is the initial developmental stage of sexuality. The baby is not yet able to separate himself from his mother. The symbiotic bond that has existed throughout pregnancy, continues even now. The baby perceives himself and his mother as a single entity, and mother's breast - as an extension of oneself. During this period the child is in a state of autoeroticism, when sexual energy is directed to himself. The mother's breast brings to the baby not only pleasure and pleasure, but also a sense of security, confidence and security.
    That is why it is so important to continue breastfeeding throughout this period. After all, for the crumbs simply does not exist in nothing more important in the world than a mother's breast. If the situation is otherwise, and the baby is forced to eat artificial milk mixtures, be sure you need to take it during feeding on the handles, so that at least partially reproduce the situation of natural feeding. Very important bodily contact, the baby should feel the warmth of his mother with his whole small body.
    At this age, the little ones are often restless when mother is not around. They refuse to sleep alone in the crib, start screaming, even if mom is absent for a very short time, they constantly ask for pens. Not refuse the baby. Coming to his call, fulfilling his requests, you do not indulge whims, but confirm his confidence in himself and in the world around him. severity upbringing will now play a cruel joke with you and with the child. Freud identified two extreme types of maternal behavior:
    excessive severity of the mother, ignoring the needs of the child;
    excessive overprotection on the part of the mother, when she is ready to anticipate any desire of the child and satisfy him before he realizes it himself.
    Both of these behaviors lead to the formation of a child with an oral-passive personality type. The result is a feeling dependency, self-doubt. In the future, such a person will always be expect from others a "maternal" attitude, feel the need for approval, support. The oral-passive person is often very trusting, dependent.
    Willingness to respond to the cry of a baby, prolonged breastfeeding, tactile contact, co-sleeping, on the contrary, they contribute to the formation of such qualities as self-confidence, determination.
    In the second half of the first year of life comes oral-sadistic stage of development. It is associated with the appearance of a child teeth. Now bite is added to sucking, an aggressive character appears actions that a child may take in response to a mother's long absence or delay the satisfaction of his desires. Due to the bite, the desire of the child to pleasure comes into conflict with reality. People with fixation at this stage features such as cynicism, sarcasm, a tendency to argue, a desire dominate people in order to achieve their own goals.
    Too early, sudden, rude weaning breasts, pacifiers, bottles cause fixation at the oral stage of development, which subsequently manifests itself in the habit of biting nails, biting lips, procrastinate the tip of the pen in your mouth, constantly chew gum. addiction to smoking excessive talkativeness, pathological fear of being hungry, desire for tight to eat or drink in moments of special anxiety and anxiety are also manifestations of fixation at the oral stage.
    Such people often have depressive character, they are characterized by a feeling of lack, loss of something main.

    Anal stage of development

    Anal stage of development occurs at about one and a half years and lasts up to three years.
    During this period, both the baby and his parents focus their attention on ... a child's bottom.
    Most parents are exactly between 1.5 up to 3 years, they begin to actively accustom the crumbs to the pot. Freud believed that the baby gets great pleasure from the act of defecation and, in particular, from the fact that can independently control such a responsible process! In this period the child learns to be aware of his own actions, and potty training is a kind of experimental field where the child can test his abilities and enjoy the new skill.
    It must be understood that the child's interest in own stool at this stage of development is quite natural. baby yet the feeling of disgust is unfamiliar, but it is quite clear that feces are the first a thing that the child can dispose of at his own discretion - to give or, on the contrary, leave it to yourself. If mom and dad praise the baby for going on the potty, the child perceives the products of his life as a gift parents, and his subsequent behavior seeks to obtain their approval. AT in the light of this attempt by the little one to smear poop or stain something with them take on a positive connotation.
    Freud pays special attention to exactly how parents teach the child to potty. If they are too strict and persistently follow to comply with the new rules, or started pottying the baby too early (the ability to fully control the anal muscles is formed only by 2.5 -3 years), besides, they scold and punish the child when he refuses go to the toilet, shame the baby for mistakes, then the baby develops one of them two types of character:
    anal-extruder . The child may feel that going to the potty, you can get the love and approval of parents;
    anal restraint . Parents' actions may cause protest from child, hence the problem of constipation.
    People of the first type are characterized by such traits as destructive tendencies, restlessness, impulsiveness. They consider it a waste of money a necessary condition for the manifestation of love.
    For anal-retaining type characterized by stinginess, greed, thrift, perseverance, punctuality, stubbornness. They cannot stand chaos and uncertainty. Often prone to mesophobia (fear of pollution) and a pathological desire for cleanliness.
    In a situation where parents behave more correctly and praise the baby for success, and treat failures condescendingly, the result will be different. The child, feeling the support of the family, learns to self-control, forms a positive self-esteem. In the future, such a person is distinguished generosity, generosity, the desire to give gifts to loved ones. There is an opinion that the correct type of parental behavior contributes to the development of the child's creative abilities.
    But even with a positive course of the stage potty training remains an element of conflict at this stage, since one sides of feces are perceived by parents as a gift, and on the other hand, they are not allowed to touch, they are trying to get rid of them as soon as possible. it contradiction gives the anal stage of development a dramatic, ambivalent character.

    Phallic stage

    Begins at about three years of age. The child is active interested in his own genitals. He learns that boys and girls are unlike each other. The baby is occupied with issues of relations between the sexes. Exactly at During this period, children ask the sacramental question: “Where do children come from?” No need perceive the child's increased interest in the "forbidden" topic, numerous "indecent" questions and the desire to once again touch their own genitals as horrific confirmation that a little pervert is growing up in the family. it normal developmental situation, and it is best to treat it with understanding. Strict prohibitions, swearing and intimidation will only harm the baby. Baby everything will not cease to be interested in the topic of sexes, and the fear of being punished can turn him into a neurotic and in the future affect his intimate life.
    The most diverse schools of psychology, speaking of development mentality of the child, call the 3-year-old age critical. Psychosexual theory Freud is no exception. In his opinion, during this period the child experiences called the Oedipus complex for boys; or the Electra complex - for girls.
    The Oedipus complex is the unconscious erotic attraction of a child to a parent of the opposite sex. For a boy it the desire to take the father's place next to the mother, the desire to possess her. In that period, the boy perceives his mother as the ideal of a woman, the position of the father in the family causes the child to envy and desire to compete. "Mom, I want on you marry!" Here is a phrase that speaks for itself. Feeling of father superiority and the fear of being punished gives rise to the so-called fear of castration in the boy, which makes him abandon his mother. 6-7 year old boy begins to identify with his father, and envy and desire for rivalry is replaced by the desire to be like his father, to become the same as him. "Mother likes dad, then I must become as bold, strong as he is. Son takes over the father has a system of moral norms, which in turn creates the prerequisites for the development of a child's superego. This moment is the final stage passing through the Oedipus complex.

    The Electra complex is a variant of the Oedipus complex for girls are a little different. The first object of love for the daughter, also as for the son, is the mother. Freud believed that women are already in childhood are envious of men because the latter possess penis - personifying strength, power, superiority. The girl blames her mother his own inferiority and unconsciously strives to possess his father, envious of the fact that he has a penis and that he has a mother's love. Complex resolution The electra occurs similarly to the resolution of the Oedipus complex. girl suppresses attraction to the father and begins to identify with the mother. Becoming similar on her own mother, she thereby increases the likelihood in the future to find a man who looks like his father.
    Freud believed that trauma during the Oedipal period complex can become a source of neurosis, impotence and frigidity in the future. People with fixations in the phallic stage of development pay great attention own body, do not miss the opportunity to put it on display, love beautifully and dress provocatively. Men behave self-confidently, sometimes impudently. love they associate victory with success in life. Constantly striving to prove to themselves and surrounding their masculine wealth. At the same time, deep down, they are far from as sure as they try to seem, because they are still haunted by fear castration.
    Women with fixation at this stage tend to prone to promiscuity, constant desire to flirt and seduce.

    Latent stage

    From 6 to 12 years old sexual storms for a while subside, and the energy of the libido is directed into a more peaceful direction. In this period the child pays the main attention to social activity. He is studying establish friendly relations with peers, devotes a lot of time mastering the school curriculum, is actively interested in sports, various types of creativity.
    New elements of personality structure are being formed child - ego and super-ego.
    When a baby is born, all existence is subordinated to a single component of personality, which Freud called "It" (Id). It is our unconscious desires and instincts that obey the pleasure principle. When the pursuit of pleasure enters into conflict with reality, the next element gradually begins to appear from It personality "I" (Ego). I am our ideas about ourselves, a conscious part a person who obeys the reality principle.
    As soon as the social environment starts require the child to comply with certain rules and norms of behavior, this leads to the emergence of the last, third element of personality - "Super-I" (Super ego). The superego is our inner censor, the strict judge of our behavior, our conscience. At the latent stage of development, all three components personalities are formed. Thus, throughout this period active preparation for the final stage of psychosexual development - genital stage.

    Genital stage

    Begins at puberty when corresponding hormonal and physiological changes occur in the body adolescent, and develops until about 18 years of age. Symbolizes becoming mature, adult sexuality that remains with a person until the end of life. In that moment there is a unification at once of all previous sexual aspirations and erogenous zones. Now the goal of a teenager is normal sexual intercourse, the achievement of which, as a rule, is associated with a number of difficulties. For this reason throughout the passage of the genital stage of development may appear fixations at various previous stages. The adolescent, as it were, regresses to a more early childhood. Freud believed that all adolescents at the beginning of genital development go through a homosexual stage, which, however, is not necessarily bright pronounced character, and may manifest itself in a simple desire to communicate with representatives of their gender.
    For successful passage of the genital stage need to take an active position in solving their own problems, to show initiative and determination, to abandon the state of childish infantilism and passivity. In this case, a person develops a genital personality type, which in psychoanalysis is considered ideal.
    In conclusion, it must be added that psychoanalytic teaching practically excludes the successful passage of all stages psychosexual development. Each of the considered stages is filled contradictions and fears, which means that with all our desire to protect the child from childhood trauma in practice is not possible. Because it's more correct it would be said that any person has fixations on each of listed stages of development, however, one of them is more prevalent and the oral type of personality is read, in another - anal, in the third - phallic.
    At the same time, one thing is beyond doubt: having understanding of the features of the course of psychosexual development, we can significantly reduce the risk of serious injury at one stage or another development, contribute to the formation of the personality of the baby with a minimum for him damage, which means making him a little happier.


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