Words to make someone feel better about themselves
50 Nice Things to Say to a Friend
July 6, 2017
What do you say to a friend to lift their spirits or let them know that you value their friendship? Compliments can go a long way to letting someone know that you care, but there are even more powerful benefits to saying nice things to someone.
The Power of Saying Nice Things
According to research, the social reward of a having something nice said to you, or about you, could enhance your motor skills and improve performance. So, your compliments can help someone learn a new skill or improve an old one.
In fact, the scientists found that the same area of the brain is activated whether a person is rewarded with cash or a compliment. Talk really is cheap, and the nicest gift you may be able to give to someone is a few positive words.
Mark Twain once said, “I can live for two months on a good compliment.” These little gems really can sustain a person.
What to Say to Someone
Here are some ready-made compliments you can use to say something nice to someone, no matter what the occasion. Feeling low, chances are there are a few in here you can say to yourself, too.
- You are more fun than anyone or anything I know, including bubble wrap.
- You are the most perfect you there is.
- You are enough.
- You are one of the strongest people I know.
- You look great today.
- You have the best smile.
- Your outlook on life is amazing.
- You just light up the room.
- You make a bigger impact than you realize.
- You are always so helpful.
- You have the best laugh.
- I appreciate our friendship.
- Your inside is even more beautiful than your outside.
- You just glow.
- I love the way you bring out the best in people.
- Our family/school/community/church is better because you are part of it.
- You bring out the best in the rest of us.
- You inspire me.
- Nothing can stop you.
- You just made my day.
- You make me float up like I’m on millions of bubbles (We got this one from one of our kids after he got a new coat.
) - You are an excellent friend.
- When it comes to cooking, no one’s meals are quite as delicious.
- I am a better person because of you.
- You have taught me so much.
- I like the way you are.
- You are a great parent. You can tell just by looking at how thoughtful your kids are (A two-for-one compliment)
- You have the best sense of style.
- You make me want to be a better person.
- You look so young!
- I hope you are proud of yourself, because I am!
- You are one of the bravest people I know.
- That color looks perfect on you.
- You are so trustworthy; I always believe what you say.
- Everything seems brighter when you are around.
- Even the things you don’t like about yourself make you interesting.
- I know that you will always have my back, because that is the kind of person you are.
- You have the best ideas.
- You are a great example to others.
- I know that if you ever make a mistake, you fix it.
- You’ve got great leadership skills.
- You have amazing creative potential.
- You are stunning.
- You really seem to know who you are. I admire that.
- You are the reason I am smiling today.
- You’re a gift to everyone you meet.
- You have a gift for making people comfortable.
- I enjoy spending time with you.
- I am really glad we met.
- I tell everyone how amazing you are.
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Works Cited:
http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0048174
https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/marktwain100358.html
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71 Ways To Comfort Someone, Cheer Them Up & Make Them Feel Better
It’s never easy seeing someone crying or grieving, let alone someone you love.
Most of us find ourselves tongue-tied for words for a good reason as interacting with someone who’s sad and hurting can be awkward.
You want to be there for them and show your empathy, but it is hard to know how to act and what to say.
A lot of us end up sitting there uncomfortably, offering some awkward back pats, while saying, “It’s okay.”
Why is it that we know how to celebrate someone’s joy but have no clue what to do when they’re hurting?
If you can relate to the situation of not knowing what to do when someone close breaks into tears, this article is for you.
IN THIS ARTICLE
The best way to comfort someone
Best way to cheer up someone and make them feel better
But, before I share with you the best 71 ways to comfort someone, cheer them up and make them feel better, we have to be clear on our goals.
The prime goal of comforting is to ease someone’s burden and suffering.
How do You Comfort Someone?
There are many tips online on how to provide emotional support and comfort to someone.
However, it is critical to note that not all comfort is similar for everyone.
What might work for you might not work for your partner.
McKay and McKay (2019) describe some of the best steps one can take to comfort someone. For example:
You can comfort someone by letting them know that you care or love them.
Another right way to comfort someone going through emotional pain is to help them understand their emotions (McKinzey, 2021). Only then you can cheer them up, and make them feel better.
Remember, words are powerful tools. If used correctly, words can effectively comfort and ease someone’s pain.
Dr. Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist and arguably one of the best relationship experts in the world, has some excellent tips in her latest book:
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
BUY ON AMAZON
For those of you with little time to read, I’ve summarised this article into 2 parts:
- How to Comfort Someone (10 Tips)
- How to Cheer Someone Up & Make Them Feel Better (61 Tips)
Best 10 Ways To Comfort Someone
1.
Acknowledge Their Feelings
“I hear you…It seems like you’re upset because…I know that this is a hard time for you… I know that you’re hurting…”
To start comforting someone, acknowledge and describe what you see, hear, and feel.
By witnessing and affirming what you see and rephrasing what they say, you help them know that you are on the same page and are not misinterpreting their situation.
2.Repeat Their Feelings
“Of course you’re upset; I was also upset when … happened to me.”
Affirm their feelings using the same emotion-infused word they use (e.g., disappointed, heartbroken, etc.).
Sometimes, past personal experiences allow us to show that we can relate.
Be careful not to change the conversation’s focus to you, but rather, share to show that you empathize.
Avoid comparing your experience with theirs, but focus on the other person’s story.
3.Draw Their Emotions Out
“Tell me what happened… How did that make you feel?”
More often than not, people just want to be heard.
By asking them how something made them feel, you’ll elicit a response from them.
It is not about what they felt, but it’s how they felt so you can gain deeper meanings of their world.
By asking someone “how” instead of “what”, you avoid being caught in one-word replies.
Avoid asking ‘why’ questions, as they might come across as being critical, rather than encourage the other person to understand their suffering better.
4.Don’t Minimize Their Pain
Don’t focus only on cheering them up.
People find it hard to focus on the future when they’re in pain in the present time.
5.Be There For Them, Right At That Moment
When they burst into tears, if you react with: “Don’t cry…”, “you’ll feel better”, or “cheer up”, it’ll come across as trying to trivialize what they are feeling.
Instead, be a good listener, and let them talk!
6.
Offer Physical Affection, When Appropriate
If they don’t want to talk, they might not be ready to share.
In that case, and only if appropriate, give him/her a hug.
Physical affection should match the level of love you show regularly.
If you’ve never hugged this person, then perhaps a hand on their shoulder would suffice.
But if the person is your partner, a hug or a snuggle would be more appropriate.
7.Express Your Support
Let your friend know that you care and that you’re sorry for what they’re going through is very important.
Even if they feel better after talking to you, keep reaffirming your support and let them know that you are there for them.
8.Tell Them They’re Special
We all feel good knowing we are that special person to someone. Let your friend know how much they mean to you.
Nothing is better than a handwritten note, so write down how thankful you are to have a friend like him/her in your life.
Give Positive Reinforcement
Science has shown that we need three positive ones for every negative thought to counteract the negative one.
“Negativity impacts us more than positivity. It sidelines us and makes us unhappy,”
says Dr. Erin Stair, a physician and health consultant who runs Blooming Wellness in New York.
It might not have been you who put those negative thoughts into your friend’s head, but they can negate them with three positive statements at a time!
10.Keep Things Simple
Remember, most people would not share easily, even if they need some help.
However, you should at least try by asking if they want to talk.
This question alone will relieve that person’s feelings quite a lot.
Best 61 Ways To Cheer Up Someone
And, Make Them Feel Better
1.Surprise Them With A Nice Dinner
“Cooking and eating with family and friends promotes bonding and studies show, also, overall happiness,” says Danielle Hamo, a registered dietician and licensed nutritionist.
If you can, go for a healthy meal full of nutrients to help nourish your friend – with foods that relieve stress.
“When people are down, low energy impacts their body and has them reaching for backup. But, this often equals to lots of sugar and junk food,” adds Dr. Watts.
Why not try a roast chicken? It’s way easier than it sounds, and you both will feel a great sense of accomplishment when that gorgeous golden bird comes out of the oven.
Add brown rice and farm-fresh veggies to the mix, and you’ll have one satisfying and healthy meal!
Or, make them a homemade stir-fry curry dish with a dash of turmeric.
Turmeric and the fiber from vegetables, often found in those dishes, regulate serotonin.
Fish have healthy Omega-3s, and animal proteins are high in tryptophan, which triggers serotonin production.
Plus, there is a bonus to sharing food with another person; it gives them a chance to relax and perhaps more comfortably share their problem.
Having a good dinner can be calming, soothing, and relaxing and help get the person’s mind off their troubles.
2.Start An Interesting Project Together
Starting an exciting project is the best way to keep their mind connected to something productive.
This would heal that person within and would also help to lift their mood.
You can do many things together, but doing something that the person loves would help the most.
3.Organize A Movie Night
Watching a movie alone isn’t always as entertaining as watching with a friend.
Make some popcorn, gather some favorite snacks and share a movie that’s going to tickle the funny bone.
Find something on Netflix or Amazon Prime (light-hearted comedies are the right choice), and watch it together.
If tears are in order, grab a box of tissue and find a sad story.
Sometimes, tears can be as cathartic as laughter.
Or, choose a movie that is the right mix of comedy and drama.
Either way, a movie is an excellent way to help someone troubled take their mind off of the problem for a while.
4.Take Them For A Swing Ride
It might sound weird, but this trick always works if your friend is feeling low.
Make them take a seat on the swing and swing them away.
Then watch all the stress go away; it works wonders all the time.
5.Organize An Ice Cream Date
There is nothing that ice cream cannot solve.
It would be great if you know about your friend’s favorite flavor of ice cream so that you can grab especially that for them.
6.Do What They Want to Do
Take out at least an hour every week for an activity they enjoy a lot.
“Coping mechanisms that deal with life stressors are crucial since chronic stress leads to depression,” says Dr. Igbokwe.
Help your friend feel better by taking the time to do something they like to do, even if it’s playing video games.
Arrange a Spa Day
A spa day can be a real treat for you both, and above all, it is not that expensive.
Treat a friend or loved one and yourself to a Spa and “stop the rat race” for a day.
Relax, unwind, talk, and just enjoy one another’s company.
Another unique way to elevate a spa day is with Tucson IV treatments at home.
Many IV formulas are designed to naturally elevate your mood and leave you feeling refreshed.
Combined with a spa day treatment, your friend is sure to feel pampered and cared for.
You’ll both feel relaxed, refreshed, and simply pampered.
A spa day is just a great way to hit the ground running again.
However, if money is an issue, invite your friend over for an afternoon of self-care.
Gather up face masks, nail polishes, and whatever else you need to create your relaxing spa sesh at home.
Sure, the pampering will be great, but the quality time you’ll spend together will be even better — and just what your friend might need to start smiling again.
Volunteer Together
Research shows that volunteering builds confidence and self-esteem.
If your friend needs cheering up, volunteering for others can be both rewarding as well as a positive distraction from their emotional distress,” says Helen D’Angelo, a Lost Angeles-licensed chief social worker.
Go volunteer together at a local charity.
Find something that helps them connect with others that are going through worse times than them.
Volunteer to serve food at a soup kitchen or work with senior citizens.
Check online; there are several opportunities for people looking to volunteer and help others, in your country or abroad.
9.Bake Together
Baking has a therapeutic effect that eases depression and anxiety.
That is because the act of measuring, mixing, and paying attention to a recipe requires full attention.
Indirectly, they’ll create ‘peace’ in their mind and push away any negative thoughts and emotions.
The delicious smells of baked goodies also produce happy feelings.
But, if calories are of concern, share what you’ve baked with other close friends, or donate them to a charity or local firehouse.
10.Take a Tech Detox
Get them out of their bedroom and off electronics for a day.
It can get more challenging to motivate them if they hole up in a cave in their pajamas, binge-watching Netflix, or obsessively checking on Instagram.
11.Send Them a Cute Animal Pic
There’s nothing more satisfying than looking at cute and funny animal pictures.
Make someone’s day by sending a random text with a photo that will put a smile on their face.
Bonus: while searching for that one perfect pic to send to your friend, you can look at as many as you want!
12.Arrange a Group Game Night
It’s tough to cheer someone up when you’re limited to the virtual world.
Fortunately, some classic feel-good activities can take place online.
Round up a crew for a game night of classics such as Monopoly, Bingo, Trivia, and play with your friends via a zoom call.
13.Meditate Together
Organize a meditation day with your friend and surprise them by asking them to think of someone who has caused them harm.
Then with their closed eyes, ask them to start sending them good wishes, thoughts, and vibes.
14.“Wish them good health, good fortune, etc., and even forgive those who have mistreated you. There is a lot of power and positiveness in forgiveness,” says Dr. Stair.
“If you don’t know how to meditate, there are lots of apps that make meditation fun and easy to do,” completes Dr. Jackie Kibler, a Psychiatry health expert from Kansas City.
Offer Them Flowers
Go to the florist, raid your dad’s garden, “borrow” from a park and make your friend a lovely bouquet of flowers.
If you want to step your game up, you could even send them an original bouquet of origami flowers!
15.
Practice Yoga Together
Yoga carries a multitude of benefits for mental health.
Whether you guys sign up for a class or find a tutorial on YouTube, yoga is a great way to find your way back to happiness.
In addition to helping individuals get outside of their comfort zone safely, therapeutic way, yoga also lowers physiological arousal in the body.
Things like heart rate, respiration, and cortisol production are decreased through practicing yoga.
By lowering these physical stress markers, yoga helps to decrease anxiety while simultaneously stimulating serotonin production.
Thus, the benefit is twofold by relieving stress and boosting positive emotions at the same time.
16.Prank Them
Scare them and make them laugh!
“You know your friend best, so use this knowledge and experience to tailor your approach to their sense of humor,” says Dr. Watts.
They might be a tough audience at first, but once you crack the shell, it might be the best giggle either of you has had in a long time.
A quick search for pranks on Instagram will help you find some genuinely creative jokes.
Here are a few pranks I’ve found in less than a minute:
- Draw a spider on the toilet paper.
- Deep cheese balls in chocolate and present them as authentic sweets.
- Get a friend dress up as a ghost, and appear in the garden while you’re having dinner.
As the goal is to get them to laugh, make sure your friends find your pranks funny as well.
17.Go Car Driving/Dancing
Loading your friend up in your car and drive around listening to their favorite music.
Do some soul-soothing car dancing, or find some laughable videos on Youtube to inspire your little dance party.
Don’t hold back, though; challenge your loved one to bust a move wherever you are!
18.Skip Rope Together
You can do whatever exercise you want, but if you’re going to be extra silly, try skipping.
Exercise is a fun way to build endorphins, increase oxygen, get you moving and distract you from a bad mood.
“It’s hard to stay glum while you skip,” says Dr. Stair so find a rope and get a move on.
19.Tag Them in a Hundred Funny Instagram Posts
Sometimes being annoying can be endearing, too.
If it makes them smile, it is worth it.
Find all the silly videos of babies dancing, awkward moments, crazy cats, and dogs being dogs.
Tag your friend in any post that might give them a good laugh.
20.Send Them A Motivational Text
It is always nice to know someone is rooting for you.
Whether you send a simple “thinking of you – hang in there!” or scour Pinterest for a great quote/graphic combo, a little bit of inspiration will be appreciated.
21.Send A Hand Written Letter/Card
It’s always exciting to receive snail mail!
Make some cards or buy printable ones online (ideally from a small business or Etsy shop).
Write about your favorite memories together, draw a picture, or tell them how much they mean to you.
Get Them A Gift Card
Money is tight for most of us right now.
But, if you have some extra cash, pass it on as a gift card for your friend to use as he/she likes.
Get a dinner, pizza, or even a couple of drinks – the local coffee shop may offer pick-up.
Or, a virtual gift card to save for a treat once places reopen.
They’ll feel loved and have a reason to get out of the house, and a small business will benefit too, so everyone wins!
And of you want to go a step further, you can always gift them an anxiety ring!
23.Send A Story Of Kindness
There’s a lot of sad stuff happening right now, and yet, some people are rising to help each other.
If you see a story that gives you hope, share it with your friend and pass that feeling along.
24.Take A Day Trip In Nature
“Nature therapy is a big thing for improving mood,” says Dr. Stair. “Science has shown that just being in nature (or even just looking at photos of nature) naturally improves one’s mood.
”
So, whether you’re in the middle of a metropolis, or you’re lucky enough to live a stone’s throw from a national park, find something to do outside.
Even if it’s just 15 minutes of outdoor fresh air, it can boost your friend’s spirit.
Moreover, the combination of fresh air, nature, and sunshine will boost their vitamin D and serotonin levels.
25.Find (or Fake) Some Luck
Maybe all your friend needs is a little extra confidence.
Maybe scouring the street for a lucky penny or combing through a field to find a four-leaf clover is the antidote to their doldrums.
Maybe they don’t find one, so you secretly drop a penny of your own and let them pick it up, ’cause you read Harry Potter and remember the ole’ Felix Felicis switcheroo that worked on Ron.
26.Choreograph a Dance to Their Favorite Song
Want a fun activity that’s sure to take anyone’s mind off their woes?
Make up a dance to your friend’s favorite song, or try to copy the existing choreography.
Even better, get some of your friends to help and put up for a big musical show.
27.Do a Random Act of Kindness Together
Often when we do things for other people, we are the ones that benefit the most.
Do a random act of kindness together; even the smallest things count.
Start by opening the door for someone, paying for someone’s coffee, or dinner at a restaurant, by smiling and saying ‘good morning’ to a stranger, and watch your days change for the better.
28.Visualize A Better Future
Helping people think about how they’re a product of their past, present, and future, emphasizing the future, can help them see where they’re going.
Remind your friend that, in the grand scheme of things, this little hurdle will not stop them from getting that Miami yacht they keep dreaming about.
29.Build a Fort or a Treehouse
This is pretty much a no-brainer — everybody loves a treehouse or a good fort.
Get together, make plans, draw schemas on paper, and enjoy as you build, as it’ll make you feel like kids once again!
30.Smash Some Plates
Some people just need to find a way to get out their aggression, right?
After the pandemic, remember that there are dedicated places where you can pay to break plates as a stress reliever!
Plate breaking as a form of anger management and stress release has become very popular over the last few years.
31.“When done in a safe, nonviolent, and controlled setting, of course!” says Dr. Eliza Belle, the director of psychology and behavior service for Alabama’s Department of Mental Health.
Challenge Your Friend to a Noodle Fight
Grab some pool noodles and have them at it.
Try to avoid getting hit by dodging, ducking, weaving, and any other means necessary.
Remember, the more endorphins you release, and the happier you BOTH will be.
This is one of our favorite things to cheer someone up with!
32.Have Some Deep Rest
When people are going through a tough time, they get far lesser sleep.
Less sleep causes irritability, depression, and makes them prone to anxiety, so sleep is critical for their body and mental health.
Help balance out your buddy’s mental and physical health by telling them to make time for a nap.
33.Give Them A Cute Nickname
Come up with a nickname; the more ludicrous, the better.
It’s not only a great way to get them laughing right now, but it will be your secret weapon to getting them chuckling in the future, too.
34.Make Friendship Bracelets
This throwback activity is sure to bring a smile to your friend’s face.
It’ll work wonders while making it and whenever they look at it.
35.Exercise Together
“Research shows that every 60 seconds of exercise adds a whopping seven minutes to our total lifespan,” says Joshua Duvauchelle, a health writer and certified personal trainer based in British Columbia.
There is a lot of information on how exercise makes us happier, but the anti-stress and mood-boosting effects kick in less than the first five minutes of exercise.
So, get up and shake some!
36.Go On A Text Scavenger Hunt
Text scavenging hunt works like this: you send a list of things to your friend, and they have to spot them throughout their day.
Make sure it is doable but also fun and playful.
For example, have them find a pair of yellow shoes, a palm tree, and a car older than yours.
They can send you back pics as they find each thing.
This is a great way to get someone out of a funk and offer up a healthy challenge.
A completed challenge will help people feel uplifted, hopeful, and very capable.
37.Play Dress Up
Get dolled up like in the good old days.
Whether it’s in costumes, your mom’s clothes from the ’80s, or some cute outfits you bought especially for this occasion, this is an excellent opportunity to have a lot of fun.
Braid Their Hair
You can do it up in a fancy French braid or just give them some flower child side braid.
Maybe you’re a straight boss who knows how to work a fishtail braid.
Regardless, braiding someone’s hair is a great way to show you care.
If your friend is a boy, offer to give them a haircut or color their hair.
What could go wrong?
39.Plan A Sleepover
You’ve probably been doing this for years, but grab some rom-com’s, pizza, magazines, and ingredients to bake some cookies, and your night is guaranteed to be fun.
40.Practice Positive Affirmations
Recent studies show that if young people who are not that confident repeat self-empowerment statements regularly, their brains change for good.
Ask them to write down five to ten things they love about themselves and have them continue to yell them out until you see a smile sneak across their face.
Or, get them to make a list of positive self-statements and ask them to repeat them daily: I feel pretty, I am smart, confident, and so on.
Even if they aren’t able to believe these self-compliments to start with, they Decidingn them in time.
Make sure you follow up with messages reminding them to keep practicing.
41.Have A Smiling Contest
Start telling jokes, make funny noises, make your best impression, and so on.
The only catch is that you have to keep your face as straight as possible.
The first person to crack a smile loses.
Or, try out a compliment battle.
42.Run Errands Together
Studies show that people report difficulty with daily responsibilities when depressed or anxious.
Many individuals often report having trouble asking for help when depressed.
Making the decision to surprise your friend with a favor can be a great way to provide help without your friend having to make the effort to ask.
Go On A Guided Walking Tour
Download one of these audio tours to your phone, lace up your tennis shoes and grab your friend.
It’ll get those endorphins flowing; plus, you might be surprised by how cool your hometown is.
If you can’t find an audio tour, make your own; there’s an app for that as well.
44.Practice Gratitude
The best way is to create a ‘gratitude sandwich.’
Ask your friend to identify ten good things in their life right now.
Ask them to sandwich one thing that is going wrong between two things that they are grateful for.
Saying it out loud helps them realize that there is always something positive to focus on.
You can also make a list for each other of all the things you think you and they should be grateful for.
45.Help Your Friend Clean Their Car Or Room
Being surrounded by a mess doesn’t do much for their mental state.
Having a tidy space can help them feel more in control and calm.
Offering to help your friend straighten up their room or car shows you care and gives you something productive to do together.
Plus, later, when they’re on their own, they can relax in a clutter-free, peaceful space.
46.Cheer Them Up With Word Associations
Say words like “amused” or “joy” and have them say five more words that come to mind.
Studies show that this use of “priming” will eventually cause the person to feel the words and emotions they are naming.
47.Stretch It Out
Deep stretching releases the tightness in muscles, usually caused by stress.
Stretching well also promotes healthy blood circulation.
Besides, you do not need a dedicated yoga class, just your living room, and a blanket.
48.Make Them A Healthy Breakfast
Make some protein pancakes with dark chocolate spread and deliver them to their house.
Match it with freshly-squeezed orange juice as the act of hand-squeezing the juice makes them feel loved while giving them a healthy dose of vitamin B6 and folic acid.
Overall, this tasty treat reduces cortisol, releases both endorphins and serotonin, and is an excellent antioxidant source.
49.Go Barefoot In The Grass Or On The Beach
If you live near a beach or park, there are proven benefits to “grounding” or reconnecting with the electrons in nature to promote better sleep and reduce anxiety.
Make them a soundtrack of soothing sounds
A waterfall, ocean waves, rain on a tin roof, or wind rustling leaves are all soothing sounds that can help lull even the most restless minds to sleep.
50.Challenge Them To Solve Riddles And Crossword Puzzles
Our brains love solving problems.
Critical thinking also boosts cognitive function and helps remove that hazy feeling that comes with sadness.
51.Plant a tree, a patio herb garden, or repot a houseplant
The light exercise, connection with nature, and completion of a project are perfect combinations to brighten someone’s mood.
Moreover, you help the environment at the same time.
52.Challenge Them To A Fitness Contest
Any healthy competition will give them a mood boost.
Even if they don’t “win,” it’s an opportunity to burn off stress and detoxify while increasing dopamine and endorphin levels.
53.Take Them To A Painting Or Pottery Class
Pick something small so that they can feel the satisfaction of creating something in just one evening.
54.Fill Their House With Balloons While They Are Sleeping
The silliness of seeing balloons everywhere will make them smile.
Have even more fun with it, and pop them as you both walk through the house!
55.Hide A Note Saying What You Love About Them In Their Purse Or Wallet
Knowing that you went out of your way to make them smile will flood their brain with the warm, loving effects of oxytocin.
56.Host A Reading Day
Studies show that happy people were 21% more likely to read a newspaper or book than watch TV.
Take Them On A Roller Coaster
While most people might associate this with endorphins and adrenaline, the rush from amusement park rides also helps you create a bond with the person next to you, boosting oxytocin.
58.Fake A Laugh
Seriously! Just the idea of it seems silly, but many PTSD programs and therapists recommend daily laughing as ‘homework’ to feel better.
We bet as soon as you ask your loved one to fake laugh, they’ll end up laughing for real!
59.Arrange A Session Of Acupuncture
When acupuncture is applied to specific trigger points on the body, endorphins are released in the area, releasing the tension, pain, and stress.
60.Give Them A Safe Space
Bottling up your feelings can lead to chronic stress and stress-related health problems.
Support your friend or loved one by letting them know that they can feel comfortable in your presence.
Know When To Call In Reinforcements
Understand that if your friend goes through a dark period that lasts longer than a few weeks, without having at least some good days, or indicates a desire to hurt themselves, it is the time to call in professional help.
Counseling can be incredibly useful in helping someone understand their emotions and how to cope with them.
If your friend is genuinely depressed, it is most likely beyond your ability to help them out, no matter how much you try.
Yet, they are lucky to have a friend like you, alerting their parents or a specialist about their difficulties so that they can begin their treatment and recovery as fast as possible.
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Now it’s your turn…
What is that ‘one thing’ you do to comfort someone you love?
How do you best to cheer up someone when you see them down and depressed?
In your experience, what is the fastest way to make someone feel better?
Please share your experiences below, so other people can learn from you and cheer up their loved ones as well.
6 phrases that make you feel guilty
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Know yourself A man among people
Manipulation with the help of guilt is the most elementary and common method of everyday manipulation. Remember how many times a month you play a grudge in front of your partner or friend so that he, feeling guilty, fulfills your desires. This is the most typical, but far from the only example.
1. “Other mothers will come!”
... The child declares in response to your refusal to come to a school holiday, a football match, a reporting concert of a music studio. You have a blockage at work, an annual report and ten other good reasons. However, you still feel guilty.
“It's a matter of social pressure,” says psychologist Marie-Yves Landry. Some mothers are actively involved in the life of the child. As a result, your son or daughter is afraid to be different. And you, of course, are also worried.
How to behave? Decide if you are willing to sacrifice a job, business meeting or other plans for the sake of the child this time.
If you can't, promise to come next time. And then surely fulfill your obligations. And this time, a grandmother or aunt can go to school so that the child does not feel deprived of attention.
2. “And after what I did for you!”
... A father, mother or other elderly relative complains in response to a refusal to comply with his request. In this situation, it is logical to feel guilty, because your parents really put a lot of effort into your upbringing. Now you are investing in your children. But it's your choice. Just like once upon a time sacrificing something for you was the choice of your parents.
How to behave? Try to tell your parents more often how much you appreciate them. And indulge as much as possible, without waiting for an insistent request. Then you can refuse in a certain situation without being tormented by guilt.
3. “I should have thought about it!”
...You are tormented by being stuck in traffic and hopelessly late for an important meeting.
“If you often repeat this phrase, then you are used to blaming yourself for everything. Although sometimes we are simply powerless in the face of circumstances, ”explains the psychologist. Such behavior is counterproductive.
How to behave? Think, could you have foreseen this traffic jam? And will it help that you lament about it? Isn't it more important to try to find a way out of the situation? For example, leave the car in the nearest parking lot and try to get to the right place by metro. Instead of blaming yourself for everything, it’s better to praise later that you were able to find the right solution.
4. "I need you to help me!"
...a colleague announces when you are about to leave the office. “The word “need” makes you feel obligated to do a duty. We were taught from childhood to help friends in a difficult situation. They suggested that a good person will always come to the rescue, ”explains the expert.
How to behave? Is your help really important in this situation? Why is a colleague asking you specifically? Can he manage on his own? And if you don't, how serious are the consequences? Many factors influence the right decision in this situation.
But most importantly, do not confuse friendships and relationships between colleagues.
5. “We all know how busy you are.”
...A friend remarks ironically when you cancel a long-planned meeting. Sometimes hints, omissions, a special intonation and a meaningful look hurt more than directly expressed claims. And then you yourself conjecture the degree of resentment of a friend and its causes.
How to behave? Be honest. Tell me why you can't come. Perhaps he is not offended at all. Just don't start with an apology and don't try to make excuses. So you only show weakness. If the meeting failed not the first time because of your busyness or forgetfulness, think about how to please a friend. For example, give him a nice surprise, send him a cute card or a song you loved in school.
6. “You've relaxed a little.”
...So delicately your spouse hints that you've gained a few extra pounds. You yourself know that you are not in shape now, but this is your body.
Why do you feel guilty? “In this case, it is born out of a conflict between the body that you have and the ideal figure that you have always dreamed of,” says Marie-Yves Landry. Who among us would not like to be slim. But for this you need to go on a diet and go to the gym. We don't, and therefore we are ashamed of our laziness."
How to behave? Instead of being ashamed or offended by your partner for this reproach, it is better to discuss your relationship. What prompted his remark? Maybe he's just worried? Afraid that you will lose your former lightness or that you may have health problems? Offer to start the fight for harmony together. Eating right or going to the gym is more fun together.
About the Expert: Marie-Yves Landry is a clinical psychologist based in Montreal. Specialist in stress, anxiety, adaptation.
Text: Nina Nabokova Photo Source: Getty Images
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How to make someone feel guilty so that he realizes everything?
If a person does not care and he just enjoys life in this way, he will still continue to do the same. He may hurt you again or hurt someone else. If you want him to know how much you hurt, show it.
Guilt is a very strong emotion, if a person, of course, feels it.
Many people ignore guilt. They are unwilling to admit that they did something wrong. They simply do not pay attention to it, even forget about it later if no one reminds them.
But it is very important for people to feel it.
Because guilt can teach lessons. The more a person worries about this, the more he realizes what he has done. And those who ignore guilt often repeat the same mistakes, only each time their “pranks” manifest themselves in an uglier and more “toxic” way.
How to Make Someone Feel Guilty So They Realize
It is necessary to make a person feel guilty. But what can hurt you even more is when the person doesn't care at all. This is often the result of his ignorance. If you really want to make someone feel guilty, here's how to do it.
Define your feeling
You can't cry out in pain if you don't know how much it hurts. Are you angry? Offended? Do you want to hurt this person?
You really need to think about the emotions that are swirling around in your head so that you can pinpoint exactly what they are.
Once you recognize them, you can reason about why this person made you feel this way. Only then can you work on making him feel guilty.
Take the time to make a plan
You can't go up to someone and start screaming about how much you've been hurt. It almost never works and ends up looking like crazy. And do you really think that a person will feel guilty when he is shouted about it in his face?
No. You should take some time to put together a plan of action in the first place. Sit down and think better about how to get the attention of this person so that you can talk to them about important things. Once you understand how you feel and what you want to say, you can move on to the next step.
Present your arguments
Just do it, but don't be aggressive. The person will already begin to feel guilty when you tell him about your pain.
Nobody wants to admit that he upset someone. And so he will avoid you if you start making accusations.
Instead, make sure you are calm and can talk about things in a civilized manner. Even if you are really angry at heart, try to look nice and adequate on the outside so that you can really hook the person before they get defensive.
Make the person feel like they belong in the situation
Often people don't feel guilty because they can't figure out what their fault is. This misunderstanding arises from the fact that they consider themselves not involved in the fact that you are hurt. To fix this, you must talk to them in a way that they can understand.
Therefore, explain the situation in an understandable way. Analogies are great for this as you paint the same situation in a new light. So the person will understand better.
Let him see that you are hurting
It's okay to show your pain.
You don't have to force yourself to hide it. If you want to cry, then cry. Show the person how much pain they have caused you.
However, control yourself so that he does not think that you are very dramatic. Trying to hide how you really feel will make the person think you are cheating. And all the stories about how much it hurts you will be perceived as a farce.
Draw his attention to you
It's not always good to indulge in drama, but some people need it. Sometimes you literally have to go crazy to get the attention of the offender. So put on a show. If you haven't been able to reach him in any other way, this may be your only option.
Once you realize you've got his attention, slow down. Try to make sure that he understands what you are getting at. Otherwise, he will just get angry and refuse to listen to you.
Treat him accordingly
You were in pain.
The person did something bad to hurt you, and you should treat them accordingly. You may not even want to talk to him afterwards. Treat him like he did something terrible and you don't like it.
Avoid him and even insult him if necessary. Some people need this kind of "treatment" or they won't realize how badly they've done. If you act the same as always, they will think that you have not been harmed, that everything is fine.
Talk about it logically
Do not talk about yourself all the time, discussing why you are hurting. Describe what happened logically. Take yourself out of this equation. Show that someone was hurt in this situation, and it's not just you.
Some people think that a person is just too sensitive and doesn't hurt as much as he says. A logical explanation for why you feel this way can help them understand that your sensitivity isn't the problem.
Talk seriously and find out the opinion of the offender
Most people just want the other to feel guilty, that's all.
