When an introvert likes you
How to tell if an introverted guy likes you: 15 surprising signs
It can be hard to tell whether or not an introverted guy likes you. Unlike other guys, they’re often quiet and reserved.
Even so, introverts do make subtle signs when they like someone. If you’re curious about these gestures, read on below.
1) He always smiles at you
Introverts are very quiet people. They aren’t animated as the rest of us, which is why they appear sad or sullen to most.
That said, introverts do smile – especially when they see someone they like. They’re just like most of us. I know I can’t help but grin whenever I see my crush.
You may not even notice it, mainly if you’re used to smiling guys. Some people might even have to point it out to you!
So if you find him grinning at you often – it’s a good sign that he likes you. Introvert or not – who wouldn’t?
2) He likes talking to you
An introvert often feels shy around people. But if he likes you, he will try to start the dialogue, which is something he barely does!
Introverts, even the confident ones, feel uncomfortable speaking. Small talks and phone calls are a real pain for them, so they’d rather write than talk.
Although this is the case, an introvert who likes you will try to start a conversation – no matter how hard it is for him.
He’ll do so by talking about your:
- Family, job, or pets
- Hometown
- Traveling
- Favorite food, music, quotes, books, or movies
- Fondest memories, i.e., the craziest thing you did in college
At times, he’ll try to lead the conversation with things unrelated to you. He may talk about the news, even the memes he saw on the internet. He might even try to ask for recommendations for restaurants or fitness centers, to name a few.
While you might dismiss this as typical, know that striking up a conversation is challenging for an introvert! So if he does this, it’s more or less a heads-up that he likes you.
3) He remembers the smallest of details
An introverted guy who likes you will do more than just talk to you. He’ll fondly remember the details of the conversation – whether it’s big or a trivial one.
Apart from the fact that he likes you, introverts are known to have good long-term memories. According to a study, they have a more active cortex – the information-processing part of the brain.
As a result, introverts are better at consolidating memories – and storing them.
So don’t be surprised if he fondly remembers your birthday or favorite food. He likes you, so these details are ingrained in his mind because he thinks about you.
4) He’ll flirt with you – but you may not notice it
Flirting is something you can expect from any guy who likes you. But if he’s an introvert, he’ll find it hard to do the things that others do.
Despite this challenge, he’ll try to make his little flirty move. It’s usually not obvious, so he might:
Try to get you to make the first move
An introverted guy is very self-aware. Yes, he likes you, but he wants it to be as low-key as possible.
That said, he may resort to some sort of reverse psychology. So instead of asking you out, he’ll make you want to ask him out.
Yes, introverted guys can be quite sneaky!
Write to you
If you think that love letters are dead, think again. Introverts like writing more, so they are great pen-pushers. He may not be able to flirt with you as much as he wants to, so he’ll write it all on paper.
Introverts, being naturally creative and innovative, can write you something that’ll tug on your heartstrings.
Do you favors
He didn’t have to save you a cake slice from a party, but he did.
Doing favors is one of the ‘subtle’ ways that introverts flirt. Remember: they’re not always good with words, so they make up for it with their actions.
5) He gets a little nervous sometimes
Although not all introverts are nervous, most of them feel this when they’re around other people. So yes, one of the signs he likes you is that he acts all edgy around you.
It’s common in most introverts, as they are prone to overthinking or ruminating. This guy might think that he wouldn’t make a good impression, which shows in his nerves.
So how do you know if he’s a nervous nelly – simply because he likes you? Well, you’ll have an idea once you see these signs:
- Sweating. His face and palms are drenched, even if it’s cold around the room!
- Shaking voice. In case you make him talk, you’ll notice the shakiness in his voice.
- Fidgeting. You’ll see these small nervous movements on his hands and feet.
- Pacing. He’ll walk up and down the room, as if he’s unable to stay in one place.
- Swaying or rocking. In case he remains in one place, you’ll see his body rocking back and forth.
- Freezing. Then again, you’ll be lucky if he moves at all! Nerves can quickly make someone freeze right on the spot.
- Arm-crossing. This ‘closed’ body language is a sign that he feels uncomfortable or nervous about the situation.
- Nail-biting. This is another sign of nervousness. However, it can eventually develop into a bad habit.
- Knuckle-cracking. Some think that guys who do this are aggressive. More often than not, they’re just nervous!
Apart from these signs, there’s one more sign that suggests more than just nervousness. It’s apparent that he has a crush on you if he can’t help but blush! It’s harder to control than those signs above – so this is more or less a dead giveaway!
6) His body language says so
An introverted guy can keep mum about his feelings, but there’s something he can’t hide: his body language.
Yes, the way he acts around you can be indicative of what he feels.
Here are some body languages that occur when a guy is into you:
- He raises his eyebrows. He’s not mad – he’s intrigued!
- His eyes are wide open. It’s a sign that he’s keenly listening.
- His nostrils flare, which means he’s excited.
- He parts his lips, so he appears more ‘open’ to you.
- He’s always fixing himself. Be it his tie, shirt, or socks, he often straightens them up when you’re near.
- He’s grooming his hair as well. Just like fixing his clothes, he wants to look the best for you.
- He tries to stand taller. Even if he’s tall already, he’ll try to flaunt his stature by advancing his chest and squaring his hips.
- He keeps his hands on his hips. This is another way for him to show his manly stance.
7) He tries to open up to you
An introverted guy who likes will try to do more than just talk to you. He’ll do his best to open up as well.
While most men find it easy to do, it’s hard for an introvert. However, it’s something he’ll try to do for you.
Remember, he may be the restrained or inhibited type. That means he thinks a lot (and long) before he makes a move.
In other words, he won’t make rash decisions, like opening up to somebody who’s not close to him.
If you’re just any other person, he will clam up the moment you ask something. But because you’re special, he won’t hesitate to keep the ball rolling.
Should this happen, it means that he trusts you enough to let you in his small yet solid clique.
If you’re looking to get your introverted crush to confide in you more, here are some tips and tricks you can try:
- Go slowly but surely. Don’t go in for the kill and ask, “do you like me?” on the get-go. Start with light questions, such as asking him about the things he likes.
- Go one-on-one. Even if he likes opening up to you, he may refuse to do so in a big crowd. If you want to learn more about him, then go one-on-one with your introverted crush.
- Don’t interrupt. For most people, it’s okay to interrupt them from time to time whenever they talk. But if you’re conversing with an introvert, you should let him speak until he’s finished. Remember, him speaking is a golden opportunity, so give him all the time he needs.
- Revel in his silence. There are times when he likes opening up, and there may be times when he’d rather be mum. Either way, you should try to respect his silence.
- Leave him in his element. An introverted guy will open up to you more if they’re in a place that’s quiet and comfortable for them.
- Take a swipe at his hobbies. Introverts like doing solitary things, like journaling or playing musical instruments. Join them whenever they do so, and you’re sure to have a lot of conversation topics!
8) He feels very comfortable around you
Introverts, by nature, find comfort in being alone. However, they may feel nervous and anxious around other people.
This is one of the reasons why introverts don’t like being in a large crowd. They prefer being in the company of one to two persons, so they get fidgety when there’s more. As such, they often have few yet very close friends.
Despite this characteristic, an introverted guy who likes you will welcome you into this small clique.
He’ll show that by acting comfortably around you. Apart from talking to you and opening up to you, he’ll also:
- Make eye contact. This is something many introverts avoid. So if you find him staring intensely into your eyes, it’s a possible sign that he likes you.
- Smile a lot. Some may say that they have what many call a resting ‘B’ face. Introverts won’t bother putting on a fake smile, after all.
- Be at ease. He may be nervous at first, but he eventually feels more comfortable in your presence.
- Get physical in his little way. I’ll discuss more of this below.
9) He’s very caring towards you
One of the introvert’s social preferences is personal space – lots of it. They find it tiring being around others, much more caring about them. This is why they keep their clique small and true.
Because of this, an introvert may find it tiring to look after a person outside their circle.
But when they do, it’s not the way that most guys do. They may show these in their little ways, such as:
- Asking you if you’re okay
- Saying nice things or complimenting you
- Taking an interest in things you like
- Listening to you whenever you need to vent – introverts actually excel in this
- Supporting you in your efforts, i. e., joining a fun run you organized to raise funds
- Offering to help you with anything, such as carrying stuff to your office
- Messaging you, even if this is a little taxing to them
- Making a cup of coffee for you, even if you didn’t ask for one
- Sharing his food with you
- Giving you a little present – even if there’s no occasion
If the introverted guy does any of these for you, know that it’s his little way of caring. And yes, it’s another way for him to show you that he likes you!
10) He’ll try to reach out, even if it’s hard for him
An introverted guy will easily feel tired after spending time with a lot more people than usual. He will revert to his well-loved downtime, as this helps him think and make decisions.
As such, don’t be surprised if he’s sometimes out of the loop.
If he doesn’t respond to your text, don’t take it personally. As is the case of extroverted introvert Shane Crawford, there are times when they don’t want to talk to anyone.
Then again, an introverted guy who’s interested in you will make a conscious effort to reach out. He may do so by doing any of the things I’ve mentioned above. He’ll talk to you, open up, and ask you out.
11) He can’t help but be a little jealous sometimes
A guy who likes you – introverted or not – will quickly get jealous of a possible rival. As for introverts, they show this jealousy a little differently.
Here are some signs that he’s a little jelly:
- He sulks whenever you talk of another guy. He can’t help but frown or look uncomfortable whenever you talk about a date.
- …Or he’s very curious about the other guy. Some introverts may stay quiet when you talk about somebody else, but some may end up asking more about this guy.
- He sends messages to you now more than ever. Introverted guys like getting out of the communication loop from time to time. But if he’s jealous, he might end up messaging you more than usual.
- He’ll pop up unknowingly. Introverts like their space. But when they’re jealous, they’ll be on the lookout for their rivals. You’ll be surprised by how often you see them! They’ll still keep some distance, though, especially if it’s a big social gathering.
- He acts the complete opposite. One day he’s talking to you nonstop, the next day, he’s almost mute. It may be a sign of jealousy, but remember, introverts like interaction time-outs from time to time.
12) He’ll try to get physical with you – in his own introverted way
Most guys don’t have a problem holding your hand or wrapping their arms around you.
For introverts, however, this physicality is a big issue. They find it hard being with a lot of people, much more being in contact with them.
That said, an introverted guy who likes you will try to push the boundaries. He’ll make an effort to be physical with you – at least in his little way.
He often gets close to you
He may start by sitting next to or close to you. You might not notice it at first, but he tries to be near you during conferences, meetings, and whatnot.
Remember: it’s a big step for him as introverts value their own space. Their trademark characteristic is wanting to be left alone, after all.
So if the introverted guy tries to get close to you most of the time – it’s a good sign that he adores you.
He ‘accidentally’ touches you
What might be a minor ‘accident’ to you may be something significant to him. A simple brush of the arm – or the hands – may be his way to get a little physical with you.
He’s doing things he doesn’t usually do
Yes, whispering is quite usual for most. But for introverts, this encroaches on their personal space.
So if you often find this introverted guy whispering things to you – no matter how platonic – it may be his way of getting closer than ever.
13) He’ll invite you to do things with him
Getting an invite from an introverted guy is a major sign that he’s into you. He is, after all, more comfortable doing things alone. He dislikes socializing with those he doesn’t know well.
That said, he does go out with a select number of people. These include close family, select friends, and obviously, someone he likes (yes, you!)
Unlike other guys, an introvert will invite you to do more signs that he’s a little jelly. So don’t expect him to ask you out to a crowded bar. Instead, he may nudge you to:
- Take up a new language
- Volunteer at an animal shelter
- Tend to a local garden
- Travel with him
Introverted guys are not always ‘inactive,’ though. They love moving too, so don’t be surprised if they ask you out to do any of the following:
- Yoga
- Running
- Mountain biking
- Golfing
- Bowling
- Ice skating
Remember: getting an introvert out of the house to do something with somebody is a hurdle by itself. But if he’s willing to do this for you, then it’s a sign that he likes you.
14) He’ll let you inside his private fortress (a.k.a. his home)
For an introverted guy, his home is his fortress. Unless you are special to him, you won’t get past the door.
So apart from doing the things mentioned above with you, he could take things up a notch by inviting you inside his home.
Unlike most guys, introverts don’t go in for the kill right away. Instead, this invite may be his way for you to share his other hobbies, such as:
- Reading books or listening to podcasts
- Playing chess or doing puzzles
- Watching documentaries
- Cooking superb dishes
You may be expecting something more intimate, but know that letting you inside his home is already a big step for him. So if he does this, then he’s definitely into you.
15) He’ll try to explore new things with you
Introverts don’t like socializing in big crowds. But even if he prefers doing the ‘solitary’ things I’ve mentioned above, he’ll try other things for you.
This doesn’t mean that you should expect him to try an uncomfortable situation right away!
That means no big parties! Ease him in by bringing him to a smaller or more intimate get-together. Maybe you can work your way up there.
It’s important to remember, however, that this exploration may take some time. You can’t expect him to acclimatize to a group – no matter how small – as fast as other guys do.
Likewise, you should respect his decision if he wants to take some time off from these new things. As mentioned, introverts require some downtime from the hurly-burly of it all.
Should he decide not to push through with these new things, don’t feel bad. Just think of all the efforts he made! He likes you enough to break out of his introverted shell.
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9 Signs an Introvert Likes You (As More Than a Friend)
Introverts are not known for being the most forthright, which can make you wonder if they like you as a person — or more than a friend.
Since we introverts are not always, um, forthright and talkative, when it comes to liking someone romantically, things get even more tricky. How are we supposed to let them know? Are there non-verbal ways to tell them without telling them? Or, conversely, how do we know if an introvert likes us? Dating can be a struggle for an introvert, that’s for sure!
I decided to brainstorm and came up with nine signs an introvert likes you. So if one you know is exhibiting some of the indicators below, you can be pretty sure they’re interested in you as more than a friend.
1. They share personal things with you that they don’t tell others.
As you probably know, we introverts are private people — we rarely discuss things near and dear to us with just anybody. Our interests and passions, too, are well-kept secrets which we only reveal to our well-trusted confidants, friends who “get” us.
Yet, ironically, our interests and passions are key components of who we are. While others may value things they own, we introverts protect our hobbies like valuable heirlooms.
So, what if an introvert shares their inspiration with you? If they tell you about their passions, interests, inspirations, and aspirations, then you are someone they truly trust and see as an important part of their life.
If an introvert doesn’t like you, they’d likely keep that information to themselves. But because they value you and your relationship so highly, they are willing to open up and expose deeper aspects of themselves with you.
2. They share their inner thoughts with you, too (the ones no one usually hears about).
Introverts don’t generally share much about their inner lives; they keep their thoughts to themselves. As a result, they often surprise the people in their lives with big, life-changing decisions when, in reality, they thought deeply about these decisions for a long time.
And, with a select few people, introverts share the details inside their head — their thoughts and their worries, the good news and the bad. If you are one of those people, then you probably play a big role in this introvert’s life.
Okay, let’s take something simple, like talking about your day. For you, it might be natural to tell people what you liked and didn’t like, but for an introvert, they don’t share this information with the world. Rather, they share the details with a small and trustworthy set of people, including you.
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3. They move closer to you when you’re talking, and may touch your hand or arm.
It’s no secret that introverts need their personal space, whether they’re around people or not. If you crowd an introvert, they are going to feel uncomfortable and awkward. It is rare for an introvert to invite others into their personal bubble — it is their safe space, a space they can control and understand.
So, what does it mean when an introvert moves closer to you, physically? Now, this is a big step, for it is something an introvert reserves for their family and closest friends. If they are closing that personal gap, they think of you as someone special.
Physical touch is even more telling. Not only is this introvert close to you, proximity-wise, but they are also creating a physical connection between you two, as well. (Most of the time, introverts try to prevent physical contact with people they don’t know, like, or trust!) When they initiate physical contact, they are sending you a powerful message: They want to be closer to you and they are letting you enter their safe personal space — and that alone signifies a deeper bond.
4. They think of you when you’re not together — they’ll text you and wish you luck with something you told them (like a big meeting at work).
Many introverts don’t like to be put on the spot when it comes to talking or expressing themselves. Instead, we prefer to think about something a while before we say it or use a controlled written medium to get across our thoughts and feelings. This is where writing a letter, email, or text comes into play.
This way, the introvert who likes you can reveal their feelings to you in the best way they can. Whether they share all the complicated thoughts cycling through their head, tell you a funny story, or wish you luck with something you’d told them about (like a big meeting at work), their written communication will mean one thing — that they care about you. (Believe me, we don’t just send anyone messages like this!)
5. They will share their creative endeavors with you, which is no small feat!
Introverts are notoriously creative — you might be surprised by the hobbies they maintain. If an introvert likes you, they will want to share them with you. Let’s say they play music in their free time — they may play you songs they wrote (and even sing in front of you!). It’s not because they want to brag or show off. Not at all. It’s because they want to involve you in the most personal aspects of their lives.
Introverts pour a lot of thought and feeling into their hobbies. Sharing them with another person feels intimate and risky, but for the right person, an introvert would show just how creative they can be.
6. They’ll (actually) approach you (which introverts don’t do 99.9 percent of the time!).
Introverts rarely make the first move — we often rely on others to make connections and start conversations. Sometimes, introverts lack the confidence to cross that boundary; other times, they have plenty of confidence, but prefer to have an “in” to join the conversation.
It’s really important to understand just how important this behavior is for an introvert. It may be nothing for an extrovert, but this simple approaching-you action takes on a whole new meaning for us introverts. It carries more weight and demonstrates that our intention has changed.
So if an introvert approaches you, they’re not just looking for small talk, they’re not playing around or just having fun — they’re really interested in you! They’re so interested that they even defy their own super-reserved tendencies. Plus, since introverts might be as not experienced starting conversations as extroverts, it might be a little awkward. But this is just further proof that they were willing to go the distance because they like you.
7. They’ll talk —
really talk — to you (much more than small talk).As we all know, 99.9 percent of introverts don’t like small talk — we’d rather have deeper conversations about subjects that are meaningful to us. For example, they’d rather stay silent than chat with a stranger on the bus about the weather. But when an introvert is interested in you, they will set aside their distaste for small talk. They’ll ask you about everyday things and will then show interest in these subjects and ask even more questions. Why is that? Because they want to know more about you.
So pay attention to how they talk to you — it just may be the clue you’re looking for.
8. They’ll initiate communication, and more often — texts, phone calls, you name it.
This clue is related to #4, that an introvert will reach out to you if they’re into you. We all know introverts are not a fan of phone calls — but this may not be the case if they like you (at least in the courting stages).
While it’s true that introverts usually prefer texting, they will actually break out of their comfort zone and call you. Although they may not be the chattiest person at first, once you get on a topic you both connect with, watch out!
9. They’ll share how they’re feeling about you — out loud.
Okay, so by this point, you know introverts would rather write out how they’re feeling than actually say it out loud. Texting, emailing, and letter writing are all easier forms of communication. But… once they’re comfortable with you, they’ll be more likely to share their feelings with you. Until this point, you may have no idea (or not be 100 percent sure).
Remember, this is a very vulnerable thing for an introvert to do (even with friends). So, rest assured, if they’re talking to you like this, they like you.
Are you an introvert who shuts down around the people you’re attracted to?
As an introvert, you actually have the amazing ability to be irresistible, without forcing yourself to talk more. It all starts with recognizing the most common myths about dating and learning a framework for fun, flirty conversations — no extroversion needed. To learn how to connect with your true sensuality, relax, and open up on dates, we recommend Michaela Chung’s online courses for introverted men and introverted women.
You might like:
- How to Date an Introvert (Advice From an Extrovert)
- 7 Dating Tips for Introverts Who Are Tired of Being Single
- Will I Be Single Forever? 6 Introvert Dating Struggles
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10 signs that an introvert likes you
When an extrovert is courting you, no signs are needed: he himself will say the immortal “You are attractive, I am damn attractive. Why waste time?" (With). But the sympathy of an introvert must be guessed. What for? Because introverts tend to make great partners: loyal, gentle, and caring. So here are 10 sure signs that an introvert likes you.
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He gets nervous and excited in your presence
An introvert understands that in order to start a relationship, he will somehow have to take the first step himself. He understands, but he cannot do it. Therefore, your presence clearly makes him nervous: he can completely withdraw into himself, or he can demonstrate behavior that is usually unusual for him: talking loudly (not with you), acting animatedly, blushing, turning pale and giggling inappropriately.
He is silent but signals with body language
Body language is language that cannot be lied to. Look at his face: if his eyes are wide open when he looks at you, know that he sees what he is interested in and likes. Does he lick his lips often? A sure sign that he's worried. Unconsciously leans towards you, stretches out his arms, preens (straightens hair and clothes)? This is it.
There are no other women in the field of communication of an introvert
Introverts dream of finding a partner for life. They are not interested in short novels. In addition, introverts generally do not waste time with people who do not interest them. And at the moment when the attention of an introvert is focused on the woman he likes, all the others simply disappear.
An introvert invites you into a personal space
First, into the space of dialogue. In fact, this is already a serious step for him. It is easiest for an introvert to escape to his "inner Mongolia" and spend time alone with himself. If he spends it on you, he is interested in you. If at the same time he is ready to let you into his physical boundaries, there is no doubt at all that he likes you. The day when an introvert invites you to visit can be considered the beginning of a relationship (although you hardly even kiss).
He talks about the secret
If an introvert tells you about his thoughts and feelings, you can safely assume that the fortress has fallen and enter the gate as a winner. Introverts are frank only with close friends. And you are hardly his close friend, because they have been testing friendship for years.
He does things for you
Introverts are actually very responsive and empathic people. They feel what others want, but they are never ready to do it without a request: they guard their personal boundaries and treat others with the same care. So if suddenly an introvert does something for you without your asking for help, consider that he has confessed his love to you.
He keeps in constant contact with you
An introvert considers it quite enough to meet once every six months - with people whom he considers friends. With close friends, an introvert is ready to meet more often - sometimes even once a month (although this is a bit much). If he gets in touch all the time, it means he is in love.
He is sociable in social networks
Not in general, but with you. Network communication is much easier for him, and he will definitely not miss his chance to talk to you in the messenger. And maybe even flirt. Well, as he can.
He is arguing with you
An almost unthinkable situation! As a rule, introverts keep their opinions to themselves and try to allow people who share them into their inner circle. An argument means that, firstly, he cares about what you think, and secondly, it is important for him that you hear his opinion.
He gives you advice
If he advises you on films, music or books, he is actually trying to reveal his inner world to you. If he advises you on what to do in this or that situation, he is seriously worried about you.
8 signs of a romantic introvert | PSYCHOLOGIES
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Know Yourself
Introverts are known to have little interest in the outside world. However, they also go on dates, fall in love and get married. Often their behavior and ideas about love do not correspond to stereotypes, and others misunderstand them.
1. He is waiting for his one and only
These people take romantic relationships seriously. They are not inclined to flirt with everyone and often change partners. Introverts strive to find a person who suits them. They are tired of romantic courtship, obligatory rituals and violent displays of emotion. Once they find their person, they breathe a sigh of relief because they can be themselves again.
2. He is looking for a faithful and reliable partner
Such people value predictability and reliability. If a potential partner personifies these qualities, he has every chance to take a place in his heart. And a spontaneous, rowdy, adventurous person is more likely to be perceived as a threat to security and stability.
3. He does not openly show feelings
Introverts try to get the attention of a person they like by hinting at their attitude. They do not like long conversations about love and are embarrassed to directly confess their feelings. Unfortunately, it is because of this that they often fail in love.
4. He spends a lot of time thinking about love
Such people are prone to long reflections and analysis. They hesitate for a long time to invite the person they like on a date, because they cannot decide whether this person is the right one. Even having started dating someone, they continue to show indecision.
5. He dreams of romance, but rarely makes his dreams come true.
Introverts like to fantasize, imagine themselves as heroes of films and books, or invent their own romantic scenarios. Contrary to popular belief about spiritual callousness, some of them are very emotional.
Violent passion, expressive expression of emotions and clarification of relationships tire such a person. Erotic fantasies are original and varied, but rarely become reality.6. He does not strive for the rapid development of relations
If they decide on a romantic relationship, then they develop slowly. They try to get to know their partner better in order to understand whether he is suitable for living together. A stormy passion, an expressive expression of emotions and a showdown of relationships tire such a person, confuse him.
7. He is in dire need of solitude, even if he has found his soulmate
Even the most harmonious relationship is tiring.