What to do when you feel alone in a marriage


Married But Lonely: 4 Potential Causes & What To Do

It's actually relatively common to feel alone in a marriage: One in three married people over age 45 report being lonely, according to a 2018 AARP national survey. But that doesn't mean loneliness in a marriage is necessarily normal. If you feel alone in a marriage, it's often a sign that there's an underlying issue in the relationship or in your own personal life that must be addressed.

A marriage is a long-lasting, committed partnership between two people, but that doesn't mean that married people can never feel lonely. That's because there's a big difference between being alone and being lonely, says Kiaundra Jackson, LMFT, a licensed marriage therapist and author of Hard Work or Harmony. Being alone simply means you are in a physical state of not being around or attached to anyone else, whereas being lonely has more to do with how much your relationships nourish you and how full your life feels.

"Loneliness is a deeper thing because it's more of a psychological state where people feel like their relationships, the quantity of their relationships, the quality of their relationships, are not where they need to be," Jackson explains. "You can be lonely and not be alone. You can literally be surrounded by a whole bunch of people and still feel like you're lonely."

In the context of a marriage, if your marriage isn't fulfilling your need for companionship, love, affection, or other social needs, you may very well feel lonely despite technically having a life partner.

"Physical proximity isn't the sole factor when it comes to experiencing closeness in a relationship," explains licensed marriage therapist Beverley Andre, LMFT. "You have to consider emotional proximity—how in tune are you with your partner? If there is an emotional gap [or] chasm in the relationship, your partner could be sitting next to you, and still feel oceans apart."

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1.

There's a lack of connection

When partners aren't emotionally connecting with each other, Andre says it can feel like there's a distance between them—which can feel very lonely for one or both people. She notes that this usually happens after there has been some sort of shift in the relationship: "At a certain point, the couple stopped being in alignment with each other, hence the distance."

Here are some things that can cause partners to feel distant from each other and therefore feel lonely, according to Jackson and Andre:

  • Feeling like your partner doesn't listen to you
  • Feeling like you're not having enough sex
  • Poor communication or lack of communication
  • Money issues
  • Life transitions
  • Day-to-day stressors
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2.

There's a lack of effort or attentiveness in the relationship

"People get lonely in marriage when they go through the mundane waves of life," Jackson says. "They go to work, they come home, they go to school, they take care of the kids, they cook dinner, and they just go through the regular day-to-day motions, and there isn't any specific time to connect with their spouse."

When couples fall into the monotony of daily life without making intentional time to connect as a couple, the relationship can begin to feel stale and lack affection. This can create feelings of loneliness if one or both parties feel like they're not receiving special, romantic attention, time, or energy from their spouse.

3.

Parental responsibilities are getting in the way

Sometimes couples struggle to separate the role of being parents and the role of being spouses, focusing entirely on their parental responsibilities and neglecting their relationship. "Our role as a parent is very important, but you also have to give time and energy into your marriage," Jackson says. "And when you don't? You can feel lonely."

Spending all your energy on caring for others and not receiving any dedicated affection yourself can feel isolating, not to mention draining.

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4.

Partners are overly dependent on each other for feeling fulfilled

In a 2020 study published in the Journal of Family Psychology on almost 1,400 heterosexual married couples in their 50s through their 70s, the researchers noted that married couples are dealing with increased enmeshment, wherein their lives are unhealthily intertwined. When couples exclusively rely on each other as their primary social connection, it can put a strain on the relationship—and leave the individual people susceptible to loneliness when the relationship inevitably goes through phases of disconnection.

It's easy to fall into the trap of making your spouse wholly responsible for your sense of fulfillment and validation, Jackson says. But people need to be able to feel full and complete on their own as individuals, whether they're in a long-term relationship or not. In other words, your marriage cannot be the only thing that keeps you from feeling lonely.

"You shouldn't be seeking full validation from your partner when you're married," Jackson says. "You can't look for another person, whether that is your spouse, to fulfill you 110%. You have to be happy with you. You have to give your own self joy. You have to have your own career goals. You have to have your own passions."

If the idea of having a feeling of a totally complete life outside of your partner—and having goals and relationships outside your marriage that make you feel full—makes you feel uncomfortable or scared, it's probably a good sign that this is something you need to work on.

Tell your partner

Both Andre and Jackson emphasize the importance of telling your partner how you're feeling. The Journal of Family Psychology study found that, in a heterosexual marriage, husbands' and wives' levels of loneliness weren't correlated—meaning it's fully possible that your spouse has no idea how lonely you are.

"People often think that their partners are mindreaders, and their partner is not a mindreader," Jackson says. "You might be feeling lonely or alone in your marriage, but your partner might not be feeling that way."

So say it out loud to your partner so they know something is off in your marriage, Jackson says. Once they're on the same page as you, then you can work together to figure out how to help you feel less lonely.

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Figure out what has changed in the relationship

Andre says that often when people start to notice they're feeling lonely in their marriage, it's because there's been a recent shift in the relationship that's thrown the partners out of sync and created that feeling of distance. If you can pinpoint what caused the shift, you'll know what to focus on as a couple to heal the divide.

"Backtrack and see if you both can identify when the shift started happening, and collaborate on ways to mitigate the feelings of loneliness," she says. "If this is proving to be difficult, seek professional help in order to work strategically as a unit."

Learn each other's love languages

The five love languages are words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time, acts of service, and gifts. Each person has one primary love language that's their preferred way of receiving love. Jackson recommends couples who are trying to feel more emotionally connected with one another learn each other's love languages and start more actively giving that form of affection.

"When you can speak your partner's love language," Jackson notes, "there's no room for them to feel lonely because they're going to feel loved and appreciated and heard and respected."

Get support

If you and your partner are struggling to work on this issue or simply don't know where to start, both Andre and Jackson say working with a couples' counselor or therapist can be a helpful way to get on the right track.

There are also a plethora of relationship resources, such as books about relationships, online courses, and virtual couples' events, that can help couples get some more support. Jackson recommends The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, Ph.D., and Nan Silver.

Know when it's time to leave

Loneliness in a relationship doesn't mean the relationship is over, nor does it necessarily mean you don't love each other anymore. That said, once you bring up your feelings to your partner, pay attention to whether they really step up to help you feel secure and loved in the relationship again. Additionally, notice if you feel yourself lacking the motivation to work on the relationship, Andre advises.

"I believe if both parties are intentional about doing the repair work together, progress can happen," Andre notes. "However, if the level of investment changes for one or both in the marriage, and there is no self-motivation to fight for the marriage, a conversation may need to be had about what decisions protect the mental wellness of the parties involved."

Develop your own friendships and inner world

It's important for couples to not depend solely on each other for their sense of fulfillment and aliveness, Jackson points out. If you're feeling lonely, it may not be because there's anything wrong with the relationship itself or with your partner—instead, it could simply be a sign that you are missing the strong friendships, community, and contentedness in yourself that are necessary for any person to feel whole.

If this is you, it's time to move your relationship from codependent to interdependent by prioritizing your own wholeness. What fills you up? What hobbies and passions can you lean into to light up your world, outside of your marriage? How can you start to nurture the other relationships in your life, including friends and family? It may be time to start making some new connections (here's our guide on how to make friends as an adult, if you need it!), in addition to working toward an internally sourced feeling of fulfillment.

It's actually common to be married but lonely, but that doesn't mean it's something you should expect or accept in a marriage. Often loneliness in a marriage stems from a lack of connection, a lack of effort in the relationship, or a lack of individuation—or some combination of these factors.

If you're feeling lonely in your marriage, start by talking to your partner about what you're feeling and how you can increase feelings of intimacy between you. At the same time, look within: How can you find ways to feel full on your own, as an individual? 

15 Tips on What to Do if You’re Married but Lonely

In This Article

One of the common assumptions when it comes to marriage is that when you tie the nuptial knots with your partner, you may not be lonely again.

However, you can be lonely even when you are married, and this is because there are some suppressed issues that you and your partner have avoided. In this article, you will learn the signs of loneliness in marriage and some possible solutions to solve this problem among couples.

Is it natural to feel alone in marriage?

It might seem natural to feel alone in marriage, but this should not be the case. Anytime you have this feeling of loneliness, it means that something is fundamentally wrong. Hence, you need to find the reason for this feeling and make the necessary corrections.

It does not mean that your marriage is over when you feel alone or lonely. It only suggests that you and your partner must have missed out on some things that should make your marriage rock-solid. Therefore, you must revisit why you married and renew your commitments.

To learn more about marriage and loneliness, read this research study by Steven Stack titled Marriage, Family, and Loneliness. This study sheds more light on the connection of marriage to family ties, cohabitation, and comparative analysis. 

5 signs of being married yet lonely

Being married to someone does not eliminate the chances of being lonely. When you are married but lonely, you cannot emotionally connect with your partner. At this point, there is no mental and physical intimacy between the both of you.

1. Feeling of disconnection from your partner

When partners do not connect emotionally, it feels like a distance has been created between them. Therefore, one of the signs that you are married but lonely is when you feel like an emotional gap has been created. 

One thing that can make you feel disconnected from your partner is when you feel like your spouse does not listen to you.

Related Reading: The 15 Signs of Relationship Disconnect and How to Fix This

Watch this video on how to reconnect with your partner: 

2. You don’t request things from your partner

Another sign that you are married but lonely is when you don’t feel the need to ask your partner for some things. You might be comfortable asking other people apart from your partner because you don’t need to use anything they have.

The only time you are likely to get things from your partner is when they notice that you have a need and offer to help.

3. Absence of quality time

You might be married but lonely when you don’t see a reason to spend ample time with your partner. You most likely prefer to spend time with people other than your partner because you don’t crave closeness with them again. 

Sometimes, if they want to spend time with you, you will give different excuses not to be around them.

Related Reading: 15 Reasons Why Quality Time Is So Important in a Relationship

4. You don’t remember their special days

If you find it hard to remember your partner’s special days, marriage loneliness might be in the mix. 

On some occasions, if you get a reminder, you don’t show the expected level of enthusiasm, which could leave your partner wondering. Similarly, you are sometimes not motivated to get your partner gifts to commemorate some of these special days.

5. Communication problems

When you are lonely and married, you will likely experience communication problems. If you face any challenge outside the home, discussing it with your partner might be hard because you feel lonely in marriage.

Similarly, if your partner does something you don’t like, you will rather keep quiet because you want to avoid confronting them. Someone married but lonely will not try to communicate with their partner.

What is the cause of loneliness in relationships and marriages?

People are lonely in relationships and marriages for different reasons, and it often comes from isolation, disconnection, and sometimes, invalidation. One of the reasons why loneliness exists is because of unrealistic expectations.

Some people don’t set the right expectations for their partners, and they get disappointed eventually. When you understand your partner’s capacity, you will be able to set the right expectations for them.

Another cause of loneliness in marriages is comparison. Some people make the mistake of comparing their partners to their exes or other individuals. When you keep comparing your partner, you may lose touch with reality.

You might assume the best about people and presume the worst about your partner. If you also have many work responsibilities, you might be unable to connect with your partner like before. You may not be committed to creating space and time for your partner as you should.

What are the effects of being married but lonely?

Being a lonely husband or wife in a marriage can be an unpleasant experience that people rarely discuss. Loneliness can affect you in different ways you might not be aware of. It can increase the risk of depression and anxiety, poor self-care, substance or behavioral addiction, etc. 

When you are married but lonely, you will not be motivated to do things that will benefit your health.

Learn how being Married but lonely affects older people in this interesting research. This study is titled Married but lonely- Impact of poor marital quality on diurnal cortisol patterns in older people: findings from the cross-sectional KORA-Age study. Hamimatunnisa Johar and other authors wrote it. 

10 tips on what to do if you’re married but lonely

If you are married but lonely and want to save the union, you can apply some of these tips to bring you out of your emotional hiatus. Here are some things you can do if you feel alone in a marriage.

1. Discover the possible reason for the loneliness

When you are married and lonely, you need to find out what has changed between you and your partner. This is where you introspect to discover why you now feel lonely. Then, you can look back to the period when this feeling of loneliness was absent and at the activities you did then that you no longer do.

For instance, you might feel lonely because you have not had a vacation with your partner in a long time. When you figure out why loneliness crept into your marriage, you can discuss it with your partner.

2. Discuss your loneliness with your partner

It is only right to let your partner know you are lonely in the relationship. If you keep this information from them, you will be doing yourself and the relationship a disservice.

When you tell your partner about this issue, be careful not to blame them. Rather, approach this issue from the standpoint of understanding and concern for the relationship’s health.

You can let your partner know that you have not felt bonded to them in a long time, and you miss that feeling. Also, you can ask open-ended questions about this issue so they can respond.

3. Listen to your partner

Even though you feel lonely in a marriage and discuss it with your partner, it is important to listen to them. You might be surprised to hear they are also experiencing the same loneliness but have not spoken about it yet.

Therefore, listen to what your partner has to say without being defensive. Please don’t allow yourself to be overwhelmed by your emotions so that you don’t judge them. When you practice active listening with your partner, you will get some vital points that might help sustain your marriage.

4. Create a plan to reconnect with your partner

When you feel lonely in a marriage, you need to plan to reconnect with your spouse. Remember that for a marriage to be successful, it requires intentionality and commitment from both parties.

Also, when you spend more time with your partner doing different activities, the flame between the two of you will be rekindled. For example, you can spend time doing a hobby common to both of you, provided it allows you to be together.

5. Don’t blow your expectations out of proportion

When you are married but feel alone, it might be that your expectations are high, and that is why you feel lonely. Hence, it is advisable to review your expectations and try to adjust some of them. 

Remember that your marriage might not be able to meet all your needs.

Some of the things you are expecting from your partner might be impossible within their capacity. There are some things that you might only be able to get outside your marriage and not your partner.

Related Reading: Managing Expectations in Your Marriage

6. Practice healthy self-care

While you work towards eliminating loneliness in your marriage, take care of yourself. Look out for your physical, mental, and emotional health, and put measures in place to keep them in good shape.

Please do not engage in activities that will endanger different aspects of your health because it can affect your relationship. Instead, continue practicing healthy habits that will make you feel fulfilled as an individual and spouse.

7. Learn your partner’s love language

Sometimes, one of the best ways to help yourself from loneliness is by showing intentionality towards your partner. For example, you can try knowing your partner’s love language and showing them love through that medium.

With time, you will discover that the intimacy between the two of you will deepen because you are committed to making them happy. Sometimes, they might reciprocate and care for you in your love language.

8. Show gratitude to your partner

Even though you are married but lonely, you may still agree that you have had some enjoyable times with your partner. Learn to express gratitude to your partner for their input in the marriage. Talk about the things they have done that made you happy.

You can even express appreciation for the little things they didn’t notice. Showing gratitude helps you to see your partner and marriage in another light. It also serves as a subtle reminder to both parties to keep caring for and loving each other.

9. Learn to resolve conflicts the healthy way

One of the reasons you might feel alone in a marriage is because there are unresolved conflicts that both of you have refused to talk about. This may be one of the reasons why an emotional gap has been created because too many disagreements and fights have not been sorted out.

You and your partner need to know how to manage conflicts so that it would not kill the communication and love in your marriage. This should begin by hearing each other out, owning up to your mistakes, and promising to make each other happy subsequently.

10. Speak with a professional

If you are married but lonely, you can consider speaking with a professional mental health counselor or therapist. When you seek counseling from a professional, it may become easier for you to uncover the root cause of your loneliness.

When you find out the reason, the professional will help you with actionable steps to eliminate the feeling of loneliness. Additionally, you might need to attend some sessions with your partner to smoothen out some relationship issues.

For partners who now feel unloved and lonely in their marriages, David Clarke’s book is an eye-opener on how to resolve the situation. The book is titled Married But Lonely. 

Final thought

One of the ways to tell if you are married but lonely is to ask yourself how you feel whenever your partner is unavailable. Also, you can be honest with yourself if you prefer being unmarried or not.

With the information in this piece, you can tell whether you are truly lonely in your marriage. You can also take a relationship course or see a therapist to expound on applying some of the tips mentioned above that can save you from loneliness in an unhappy marriage.

What to do if you feel lonely in marriage, and how to overcome it without going to a psychologist / Bright Side

Almost 30% of people who are married feel lonely. Psychologists say that partners begin to feel some distance from each other when an emotional connection between them disappears. Moreover, no one is immune from such difficulties: such a situation can arise even in the strongest and happiest relationships, where both experience sincere feelings. nine0003

We at ADME figured out how to stop feeling lonely next to your soulmate, and collected 10 tips that will help restore harmony in relationships.

1. Take the initiative

There is no better way to fix a problem than to take the first step towards solving it. Take the initiative to share your feelings with your partner and give them the opportunity to do the same. Loneliness is rarely felt by just one person in a relationship: if you feel abandoned, most likely your soulmate is also .

2. Let go of past grievances

Psychologists believe that nothing creates loneliness in a marriage more than unforgiven pain, conflicts and insults. If you have been offended, try to forgive your partner and let go of the situation . And in case you hurt a loved one, talk openly with him about it and sincerely ask for forgiveness.

3. Don't compare your relationships

Social media is full of examples of "ideal" marriages. When a person looks at bright pictures and compares other people's relationships with his own, he may experience a feeling of loneliness. For example, today is Valentine's Day, the couple had a great evening at the restaurant. But then the woman goes to the social network and sees how others receive huge bouquets of roses and expensive jewelry. This will automatically make her feel lonely and create an uncomfortable distance within the relationship . In order not to experience such sensations, psychologists advise spending less time on these sites. According to a study, people who spend more than 2 hours a day on social networks are 2 times more likely to feel lonely than those who spend half an hour daily there. nine0003

4. Increase physical contact

Physical intimacy is the key to emotional feeling. By the way, this applies not only to intimacy, but also to trifles. For example, while watching TV together, try to sit closer to your partner, and when meeting him after work, do not neglect sudden hugs and kisses .

5. Don't think for your partner

The longer people are together, the more they tend to think they know their partner's feelings and thoughts. However, research clearly shows that this is not the case. nine0005 Being married and in close emotional connection with each other, everyone still goes their own way of life , in which there can be anything: from difficulties at work to inner experiences. Therefore, it is important not to think for another person, but if his behavior causes severe anxiety and resentment, then it is better to bring him to an open conversation.

6. Deal with the source of the problem

Try to understand where this unpleasant feeling of loneliness came from. Possibly the real reason lies in something else, completely unrelated to the relationship. In this regard, instead of automatically blaming a loved one or holding back negativity within yourself, take the time to deal with the true source of the problem. Maybe it's the growing pressure from the authorities? Or have you not truly rested for a long time and your soul and body yearned for a 2-week vacation?

7. Don't throw all the responsibility onto your partner

Don't expect your loved one to become your partner, best friend, lover, parent and intellectual stimulant all in one bottle. If you shift all these roles only to your soulmate, you can always feel a little disappointed and lonely. For this reason, instead of relying on the partner to cope with these responsibilities, share them among friends, relatives, colleagues. This method, according to psychologists, will relieve some of the burden on relationships. nine0003

8. Don't blame your loved one (or yourself)

Putting the blame on your partner for everything won't help you feel lonely. Accusing a loved one of working too hard, paying too little attention, or doing something else that you think is wrong will lead to him being removed from you. At the same time, sinking into your own sadness and anger at yourself will only make you feel worse . Instead, try to move communication with your soulmate in a more positive direction, pay less attention to trifles and concentrate on what unites you. nine0003

9. Spend more time together

If one of the partners has overcome the feeling of loneliness, do not neglect spending time together. Yes, sometimes we get caught up in the daily routine: one watches TV while the other reads a book or surfs the Internet. But the less time a couple spends together, the more likely it is that they will feel at a distance from each other . To prevent this from happening, think about what kind of activity both of you will like. For example, find a cool series, cook something tasty and arrange a movie night together. nine0003

10. Share your feelings

Fear of being vulnerable and being afraid to open up contributes to the fact that a person will be lonely in a relationship . When you are close to someone, but he does not know much, this can become a reason for moving away from each other. Therefore, do not be afraid to share your innermost feelings with your partner: if he really loves you, he will listen and help you overcome any difficulties and doubts.

Have you ever felt alone while in a relationship? What helped to cope with this problem? We look forward to your comments. nine0003

Bright Side/Psychology/What to do if you feel lonely in marriage, and how to overcome it without going to a psychologist

How to get rid of the feeling of loneliness in marriage Relationship

Feelings of disunity may linger from a distant shared past or appear due to a discrepancy in schedules.

You can listen to the article. If it's more convenient for you, turn on the podcast.

Rossana Sni

Family psychologist. nine0003

When we finally meet our soul mate and marry our “one” or our “one”, we feel like the relationship will last forever. No more lonely nights, we found each other! Unfortunately, this is not always the case.

Loneliness in marriage is experienced by millions of couples around the world. Suddenly one of the spouses feels abandoned, and more often this feeling is born in women. Perhaps the connection weakens over time, or the partners practically stop talking, but they begin to argue and quarrel a lot. nine0003

Why there is a feeling of loneliness in marriage

Before you figure out how to return the feeling of fulfillment to family life, it is important to understand where loneliness comes from in marriage. This feeling can appear for several reasons.

Fear of a partner

In a marriage with an emotionally unstable person or even an abuser, the feeling of loneliness is absolutely natural. When we are afraid of a loved one, manifestations of his aggression or harsh statements, we do our best to stay away and not initiate communication once again in order to avoid conflicts. nine0003

The situation becomes even more complicated if, during the first years of marriage, one of the partners isolated the other from family and loved ones. In this case, it is natural to feel as if there is no one to ask for help, hence the feeling of loneliness.

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Schedule mismatch

If a wife comes home when her husband is asleep and he leaves before she has time to wake up, it's no surprise that some of them feel lonely.

Differences in the schedule can lead to serious discord - the spouses simply will not be able to keep in touch, which means that they will move further away from each other.

Too much time apart

Let's imagine that things are not so bad and the husband and wife still see each other. But 20 minutes a day between work and trips with children to different circles. It would seem that there is communication, but it is so short and fragmentary that the feeling of loneliness still arises and remains inside. nine0003

Lack of emotional support

Everything happens in life, and sometimes troubles fall on us like snow on our heads. At this moment, we want the partner to support us - to say that everything will be fine and we will definitely cope. If we do not receive this, the distance between us and a loved one increases, and loneliness rolls with renewed vigor.

Let's say you learned about the death of a distant relative with whom you were on very good terms. You are sad, and your partner only says: “Well, he was already 96, he lived a long life. He's in a better place now." And that's it. No support, no sympathy, just a bunch of clichés. In such situations, it is not surprising to feel completely alone.

Lack of intimacy

In couples where partners feel lonely, intimacy is a rather rare thing. In addition, even small signs of love and attention to each other may disappear: kisses in the morning, hugs, walks by the hand.

This may seem like a small thing, but no matter how. Flirting and other manifestations of passion are closely related to intimacy. If romance has long gone from a relationship, something else must have come into them - loneliness. nine0003

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Old wounds

I work with a couple who have been together for six years and are just going through a similar crisis. At the very beginning of the marriage, the husband's mother interfered in the relationship of the spouses, which offended the wife. In the end, the mother-in-law apologized to her daughter-in-law, but the wound remained. nine0003

The husband now feels that he is “stuck” somewhere in the middle of a showdown between mother and wife, and constantly thinks that he must take sides. That is why he is lonely: he believes that he cannot talk about his experiences with either his mother or his wife in such a way as not to create a conflict.

If you recognize yourself in this situation or something similar happened to you, you probably know the feeling of loneliness next to a loved one.

What to do if you feel alone in your marriage

This feeling is not necessarily a sign that it is time to end the relationship. There are several ways to correct the situation and establish contact with a partner.

Go on dates every week

When you try to make time for each other on a regular basis and go to a concert, an exhibition or just a cafe, there is no room for loneliness in family life. Weekly dates will not only help you share news and keep in touch, but will also become a pleasant tradition, and you will look forward to each meeting together. nine0003

Talk to

Most misunderstandings are usually due to bad or no communication. Partners lose contact because they stop communicating - everyone goes about their lives, hoping that the situation will resolve itself. Spoiler: it doesn't.

You need to take the first step on your own, start a difficult conversation and share your feelings honestly. And not just once. Regular communication is the key to a healthy relationship.

According to family therapist Marnie Feuerman, communication helps strengthen relationships and creates the intimacy and trust many people crave in marriage. It is important to share with your partner the main successes and failures of the week. You can talk about anything: on extraneous topics or about what is interesting and close only to the two of you. nine0003

Remember the past

One Valentine's Day my husband decided to reminisce. He collected picnic food and took me to the park where we met. We had lunch and reminisced about the past. And then we drove past the high-rise building with our first apartment and a couple of other places that are connected with our love story. It was an amazing day. We talked about how cool we were having that time and how we grew in that relationship.

Walking through places that are memorable for your couple can bring back a lost spark in a relationship and even get rid of the feeling of loneliness. This will help to find a connection with each other again and with the love that originated in those parts. nine0003

If you can't go there in person, look at old photos and discuss your best memories together.

Don't forget the little things

When we think about how to improve our marriage, big gestures come to mind. In fact, everything is much simpler. Even pleasant little things, if done regularly, can reanimate the union.

Make your loved one coffee in the morning, make the bed, pour water into the bottle that he always carries with him to work. Such small manifestations of care just demonstrate love and respect. Gradually, your partner will notice these gestures and begin to please you in the same way. nine0003

Find a common hobby

When partners start doing something together, the feeling of loneliness subsides. Try to choose a hobby that both of you enjoy. Maybe you like to solve big complex puzzles, play board games in the evenings, or ride bikes in the park on weekends. Even watching and discussing a new series together will strengthen your bond, and therefore your marriage.

Show respect, empathy and understanding for your partner

In a marriage where partners behave respectfully and attentively towards each other, there is the most important thing - unity. And with unity, loneliness dies.

Treat your husband or wife like your best friend or best friend. Spend time together, don't be afraid to show your love, respect your partner's individuality and desires. Be there always, and not only in difficult moments and on holidays. You need to work on marriage every day, then the feeling of loneliness will definitely not penetrate your union. nine0003

Just before you take steps to "reanimate" the marital relationship, talk to your partner. Your husband or wife may not even know what you're going through!

However, if you still feel lonely despite all the attempts to get closer and want to keep the relationship, you should seek the help of a specialist.


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