Reverse psychology on a man
9 Tips On How To Effectively Use Reverse Psychology On A Man
Have you ever wondered whether it’s possible to use reverse psychology on a man? Does it really work or is it a waste of time?
Maybe you laid your eyes on that one special guy. You tried every possible solution that could make him fall for you bot nothing seemed to work.
Perhaps you want him to commit to you but you’re too scared to ask him. Or you even want to make your ex-boyfriend get back with you without asking him directly because it makes you look desperate.
In the meantime, you’ve come across the art of reverse psychology and you want to know whether it really works.
Can you use this technique to make a certain man fall for you, without telling him what you actually want from him?
What is reverse psychology and can you use it on a man?
Let’s be honest. Reverse psychology is seen as a form of manipulation.
Why? Because it’s a way of playing mind games with a specific person you want to use it on.
When you want to make someone do something or behave the way you want, instead of making direct requests which you know won’t turn out the way you want, you simply use reverse psychology to get things your way.
You say the opposite of what you expect them to do and they’ll do what you actually wanted from them.
It’s based on the reactance theory which generally means that as human beings, we love to believe that we aren’t controlled by other people’s opinions.
We love to believe that we have complete freedom over our actions.
We hate seeing that our freedom of choice is being taken away from us so we make sure to do the opposite of what we’re told to do.
Think about it.
There are usually two types of people: compliant and resistant.
Compliant people do as they’re told when they’re given an order.
They simply obey the rules, which is why reverse psychology doesn’t work on them.
But on the flip side, resistant people feel the need to rebel and behave by their own will, opposite to what they are told to do.
If you’re a resistant type of person and you see a sign that says ‘Keep off the grass‘ the chances are you’ll feel the need to walk on it.
Once you’re told to do something, your personality type makes you do the exact opposite, which gives you a feeling of being in control.
So, let’s say that it’s a Friday night and you want a guy to take you on a date. You know that he’s stubborn and doesn’t want to be told what to do.
Every time you ask him to do something for you, he usually does the exact opposite.
So, you’ve tried everything – from giving him subtle hints that you want him to do something for you, to being quiet and letting him come up with ideas of his own.
But nothing ever worked and reverse psychology became your last resort.
Now, instead of asking him to have a date night, you simply tell him, “Let’s not go out tonight. Having a date night would mean that I have to get ready and where could we even go?”
By doing this, you’re giving him two options, while accentuating the one that you actually want him to choose.
Also, you’re giving him the problem of where he could take you, which makes him feel that he has a task to come up with a solution.
And that’s how you can make reverse psychology work on a man.
How to use reverse psychology on a man and get him to do whatever you want
Now that you know how it works and that you can use it on a man, let me show you various tips that may be helpful when you’re trying to get things to go your way.
1. Figure out whether your man is a suitable personality type for the purposes of reverse psychology
You don’t want it to backfire on you so before taking the first step, make sure to know whether he’s the type of person who’s suitable for this method.
I already mentioned that there are two types of people: complaint and resistant.
If your man belongs to the latter category then you can use reverse psychology.
Resistant and stubborn people are more likely to fall under the influence of your words.
If they love to have things their way, then you stand high chances of succeeding.
That’s why you should first try to understand how your man acts in times of making decisions. Does he listen to your advice or does he go his own way?
Is it easy for him to agree with other people? Or maybe he tends to resist other possible options only because he wants to have things his way?
Once you figure this out, you’ll be able to know whether there’s a point in even trying to use reverse psychology on your man.
If you know that he doesn’t have a problem with doing things differently from what he wants, then there’s no point in trying this technique.
You could probably ask him politely and he would make your wish come true.
But if you realize that he’s a tough nut to crack and that he usually ignores other people just so he can make decisions on his own, then you can try using reverse psychology on your man.
If he’s really a resistant type, the chances are that you’ll be able to manipulate him into doing what you want much more easily.
2.
Present him with an optionNow that you have serious intentions of trying to use reverse psychology on a guy, you first need to start by giving him an option – something you know he’ll usually resist.
You know that he already has an idea, but you need to give him something else to trigger his resistance.
Let’s say that you’re trying to make him watch a movie that everyone’s been raving about.
You want the two of you to watch it together but you also know that the genre is far from his favorite.
Instead of giving up on your idea from the very beginning, you’re going to be sneaky about it.
So, what is it that you can do right now to convince your man to do what you want from him?
Reverse psychology!
First of all, find out what he wants to see. Be aware of your opponent.
Now, mention the name of the movie you want to watch and say something like this, “Jane told me about it. She says that it has great reviews and that I have to watch it. ”
Now, tell him a few good things about the movie or even let him see the trailer. But remember not to be pushy about it.
Don’t break in the middle of the process and beg him to watch it because you really like it and want to see it.
Instead, stay calm and just subtly tell him about all of the good sides of the film you want to see. When you’re done, retreat into a neutral zone.
You’ve planted the seed. All you can do now is wait.
3. With the help of subtle hints, make the other option more alluring
When you’re using reverse psychology on a man, the next step is to make him feel that your option is a better choice.
You can do that through subtle hints, so he doesn’t feel like you’re being too pushy.
You can mention some of the good parts of the movie to him, show him the best scenes, or tell him the experience your friend had while watching it.
Anything that can make him feel like he actually wants to see it because it sounds interesting.
Again, try to remember that you aren’t supposed to be too intense when it comes to this part.
Don’t ever beg him to do what you want because it only gives him a stronger reason to do the exact opposite.
So, be creative and really make him interested in your choice. Let him see that you’re actually giving him a good option.
Don’t worry if you see that he still isn’t giving in. His pride won’t let him do that at that time.
If he’s a resistant type of person who loves to have things his own way, this won’t be the right time to give up on his option.
Instead, it will only make him feel as if he lost control and let you make a choice. And people like this hate that feeling.
But if you stay patient, you’ll see what will happen later on.
4. Argue against your option
You gave him an option, made it sound interesting, and now it’s time to drop it completely. Sounds crazy I know but bear with me.
Now that you have him genuinely interested in the option, you want to give up on it yourself if you want to use reverse psychology on a man.
Now you might say something like this, “I know that everyone’s raving about this movie but I don’t think it sounds good at all. I mean, it looks lame, don’t you agree?”
Boom! The bomb has dropped.
By doing this, you’re letting your man know that you now don’t even want to watch it in the first place.
And if there’s nothing that makes you want to see the film, then there’s also nothing that holds him back from choosing it.
If he picks it, it won’t feel like he did so because he was listening to your opinion. How could it be like that when you don’t even want to see it, right?
You see what you did there.
You told him about your option, made it seem interesting, but you knew that he couldn’t pick it because you wanted him to. So, you simply gave up on it.
Now, he has the freedom of choice to pick whatever he wants.
And because you made your option sound interesting, the chances are that he’ll go with that one.
Who could know that things would end up like this?
5.
Let him make the final decisionNow, it’s finally time to make the final decision. And when you’re trying to use reverse psychology on a man, he needs to be the one who has the final say.
So, tell him that you’re okay if he makes the choice because you have no preference. Whatever he chooses will be a good option.
This gives your man freedom of choice and because you already made him interested in the topic, he’ll probably choose your option.
It’s not like you asked him to choose it. Instead, he made sure to do it on his own, without feeling like he made your wish come true.
6. Try not to be too available
If you’re trying to use reverse psychology on your man because you want him to dedicate more time to you, then you should opt for this technique to get what you want.
You know how you’re always there for him. Even if you’re busy, you have no problem putting everything aside and focusing on him.
But when you expect him to do the same for you, he’s nowhere around.
Even when you need him the most, if you ask him to be there for you, he always looks for an excuse.
Now, you want him to act differently but you’ve realized that asking him to pay more attention to you doesn’t work.
It actually makes him feel like he’s being controlled.
That’s why you should try this method of reverse psychology on your man.
Instead of postponing everything because of him, try not to do anything like that anymore.
If you’ve already made plans, stick to them and let him be the one who’s waiting for you.
Let him see that you have your own life and that you won’t always be able to run into his arms when he calls you.
Instead of choosing him every time, choose yourself for a change. Be your own priority.
When you do that, you’re actually making him want you more than before.
You’re showing him that you’re a strong woman who can function on her own. You don’t need a guy to lead a happy life.
That’s how reverse psychology works on men; when you don’t let them get everything they want, they actually start fighting harder for it. And that’s exactly what you’re looking for.
From now on, he’ll be the one who calls and texts you all the time. He’ll start initiating your date nights and he’ll dedicate more of his time to you.
If you had only known that it was this simple, you would have been able to do it a long time ago. It would have saved you from all those sleepless nights.
I guess that you learn something new every day…
7. Stay calm while using reverse psychology on a man
The first time you try to use reverse psychology on a man, you’ll probably feel nervous.
What if he realizes what you’re doing? What if he gets upset and accuses you of manipulating him?
They are possible scenarios but as long as you know what you’re doing, everything will be fine.
However, know that if you lose control over your thoughts, you might slip up and fall into a trap.
And if your man realizes that you were trying to manipulate him, you can say bye-bye to your relationship.
8. Avoid overdoing it
Using reverse psychology on a man can be a great way of getting things that you want.
But it doesn’t always work and you certainly shouldn’t be using it on a daily basis.
If you’re up for Chinese food tonight and your man wants Indian, you could get your own way with the help of reverse psychology.
But if you keep using it all the time, and when you can’t go a day without trying to manipulate him to get things the way you want, then you’re in trouble.
Overdoing it can be seriously dangerous for a relationship and can make both partners suffer.
Let’s be honest – how would you feel if you realized that your partner had been playing mind games with you just to get things his way? It doesn’t sound nice, right?
So, make sure to know what you’re doing and try to control yourself.
It’s nice to call the shots, but it certainly doesn’t seem like a healthy relationship when you’re always manipulating your partner to get what you want.
9. Avoid using reverse psychology in serious situations
When it comes to dealing with serious situations, you should never use reverse psychology to get things your way.
I know that it would feel amazing to have everything the way you want all the time, but that’s just not the way life works.
Let’s say that you and your partner are talking about taking the next step in your relationship.
Maybe he needs more time while you already feel ready and want to get things going right now.
If you use reverse psychology on him then, it means that you’re going to push him into something he isn’t ready for.
And sooner or later, that will backfire on you.
If he finds out that you lured him in, he’s probably going to get upset.
He might even break up with you because he feels that you played with him to get things the way you want.
So, no matter how appealing it looks, don’t ever choose to play with serious things.
In those cases, forget about reverse psychology and pretend like it doesn’t exist.
You know what they say – ‘It’s better to be safe than sorry‘.
And trust me, if you use reverse psychology while dealing with more serious things, you could end up being sorry.
Negative effects of reverse psychology!
Don’t ever forget that reverse psychology is a form of manipulation.
No matter why you’re using it, you’re still manipulating your man’s feelings in order to get what you want.
That’s why I want you to be familiar with the negative effects of this technique.
Trust me, there are many things that can be ruined just because you decide to use reverse psychology on your man.
It can ruin your relationship and damage trust forever.
If your partner finds out that you’ve been playing games with him, he’ll probably get really upset.
He trusted you and then you showed him that he was just a toy that you played with. He’s a pawn that you’ve been using to get things your own way.
It feels disheartening to find this out.
That’s how using reverse psychology on a man can actually make him lose trust in you and ruin your relationship forever.
Your man may feel insulted or humiliated.
If he realizes that you’ve been manipulating his choices, your guy can feel offended.
He might feel like you’re treating him like a child, and no one wants to feel that way.
He may also think that you humiliated him by making him do what you wanted, without actually asking him to.
If only you had let him know what you wanted from him, the situation wouldn’t have escalated this far.
If reverse psychology backfires on you, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth forever.
When you feel the consequences of your deeds once, you’ll feel the bad taste in your mouth for the rest of your life.
Sometimes, our mistakes cost us more than we expect them to, and this one might be one of them.
You might be sorry about the things you did because you know how it feels when your actions hit you like a boomerang.
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Reverse psychology in relations between a man and a woman: feedback
In the practice of manipulating people, a technique is often used - reverse psychology. This is a special technique used in business, sales and parenting. To understand how effective the "reverse" psychological impact is, you need to know how to apply it to different groups of people and directions.
Reverse psychology: how does it work?
"Reverse Psychology" developed by Michael Apter. The man has been studying various areas of motivation for a long time. The basis of reverse psychology is the concept that speaks of the ability of people to switch from one state to another after simple verbal phrases. To succeed in changing people's opinions, you need to choose the right moment, correctly compose a phrase.
Reverse psychology means that the manipulating individual says one thing, but expects to get the opposite reaction. A similar reverse effect is noticeable in children's behavior. When a parent tells a child not to do something, their reaction may be reversed. He wants to do the forbidden.
With the correct performance of actions, people on whom psychological pressure is directed think that the choice was made by them. The individual is deluded. The first times the practice of reverse manipulation requires the selection of proud people who have heightened self-esteem. The reverse technique cannot be considered the most effective among other types of persuasion.
To protect yourself from the influence of manipulating people, you need to control emotions, think through actions in advance, choose the best options for resolving conflict situations. It is important to take into account the consequences, to observe the interlocutor's reaction to statements and questions.
Who does reverse psychology work for?
To use reverse psychology effectively, you need to know who is more susceptible to psychological pressure. Types of people susceptible to the manipulation technique:
- Rebels, hooligans. This type of people can be manipulated. Lessons of training, instructions, advice are useless. The bully performs the opposite action to spite others. Behavior is manifested in the actions of teenage children, commanded by their parents. The child basically does against the will of the adult. But if a friend asks, the reaction will be positive.
- People who do things for the sake of fame, posturing. The individual will try to do everything contrary to the imposed, generally accepted principles. So he tries to stand out from the crowd. People of this type strive to achieve significant results in various areas of life and amuse their pride.
- People doing principled deeds. The type of individuals who go against the prevailing principles, forgetting about the consequences.
Reverse psychology works great when applied to people who have high levels of self-esteem. Those who have weaknesses in their own dignity are subject to the reverse effect of manipulation.
You need to understand that not everyone will do the opposite actions by what they are advised, they say. Reverse psychology is useless for those who do not have their own point of view, they are used to following the advice of others. The practice of opposite actions will not work on those who take someone else's point of view, and then expose it as their own.
Reverse psychology and children
Often parents begin to use reverse technology, if children refuse to do something, it is difficult to convince them with ordinary persuasion. The child may do the opposite to annoy adults. They are dissatisfied with decrees in their direction, complain when they are commanded.
To manipulate a child in such situations requires the use of reverse psychology. It will help change the child's mind. If parents choose the right moment, phrase, children will get confused after what happened. They did the actions at the will of the adult, but they think only about their decision.
It is important to understand some of the features of manipulating children:
- Do not use the reverse technique too often. The child will get used to it, will effectively resist commands. It is required to choose the right moments, situations. When it is possible to resolve the situation with persuasion or affection, it is better not to resort to manipulation. If this is not possible, the opposite effect can be applied.
- Psychologists categorically forbid the use of reverse manipulation techniques that cling to the child's personality. If you tell a child about the desire to hide certain things from him, referring to the inability to use them.
With teenagers, experts suggest choosing a different tactic. He was offered to attend a dubious event, you can tell a teenager that you are categorically against this idea because you are worried. The child will decide to go or not on their own.
It is worth considering the side effects of the use of reverse psychology. Many psychologists prohibit the use of this technique in raising children. This is due to the fact that if you begin to praise the child after he does something against the will of the parent, he will teach him not to obey adults. As a child grows up, he will understand that his parents do not tell the truth.
Reverse psychology between a man and a woman
Most married couples practice reverse psychology. The technique is used by a man or a woman when they have a desire to get what they want. A woman wants to spend the weekend with her fiancé, but he is determined to spend it with friends. She is sure of the futility of a direct form, she is going to act drastically. She tells him that she goes to the club with her friends. In most cases, the groom will stay at home, refusing to let her go alone.
You can use the reverse manipulation technique if you want to marry your loved one. You can’t admit your plans, try to show the guy better to show that the girl is good alone. Then the man will seek to take the girl, in order to avoid the appearance of competitors. Choosing tactics, you need to know your loved one (beloved) well. With a lack of information, a mistake made can destroy the relationship.
Reverse psychology in sales
The technique of reverse manipulation is considered one of the main tools of marketers. You need to understand that the buyer entering the store is neutral or negative towards the seller. He will counteract any shortcomings in every possible way. There are a few basic techniques you can use to effectively use reverse psychology in sales:
- When working with male buyers, female sellers often use the following method. If a man says - the goods are too expensive, the woman answers - since he cannot afford an expensive purchase, she will look for the goods cheaper. This technique works even better when the room is filled with women.
- Use of the moment - people love the forbidden. The seller "accidentally" shows the buyer a product that is not on sale and says that it is not available to buyers for a certain period of time for some reason. To increase the chances of a successful transaction, you need to think over a plan of action so that the buyer believes.
- Conduct a vote. The buyer must independently rate the product. It is better to choose a system from 1 to 10. Most will rate 5-7. The average score indicates the neutrality of the buyer you want to attract. Tell the buyer that you expected a lower rating, the buyer will start listing the points for which he gave an average rating.
There are other ways to use reverse psychology. Experienced sellers know how to use them and successfully sell their products to different types of buyers.
Reverse psychology in relationships and business
To make peace with your soulmate, you can use reverse manipulation. Often there are situations when the second half wants to take a break, since many problems have appeared, it is required to unload from an outsider, to restore feelings.
The other half of the couple should gladly agree. It must be said about the intention to gladly leave the beloved (beloved) to rest. The reaction will surprise the initiator, but save the relationship.
It is possible to influence the time of conception of children. The moment has come, but the wife refuses to do it, offers to wait. To change her decision, you need to agree with the proposal, say that you agree to wait for a period of 2-3 years. Statistics says - in 70-80% of cases, the opinion changes.
In business, reverse psychology is used in sales and communication with staff. If an employee is lazy to work, it is enough to hook his pride and pride by saying that he will not be able to do something from the work processes. The main thing is to choose the right moment, to show emotions correctly, the employee will start hard work.
You can manipulate the staff, reduce the demands on the authorities, expand the list of duties, improve the situation between team members. Any conflict situation is reduced to nothing if the manager correctly used the reverse manipulation technique.
Goods sell more successfully when using various reverse manipulation techniques. Sellers point out the lack of money from the buyer in front of other people, talk about the uselessness of the goods and try in every possible way to divert attention.
Reverse psychology is an interesting technique based on doing the opposite of what you expect. Sellers encourage people to buy various goods, managers change the decision of employees in disputable situations, parents control children, lovers restore family ties. They often use the reverse manipulation of the media when compiling promotions. It is important to understand the moments when you can not use this technique, less often practice with family strife.
The concept of reverse psychology is quite difficult to understand, but in the video with examples it is explained as simply and accessible as possible. After watching this video, everyone will be able to use the techniques of this type of psychology to their advantage and change their lives for the better.
Reverse psychology in relationships
Contents
- 1 Psychology of relations between a man and a woman
- 2 Reverse psychology
- 3 Reverse psychology
- 4 Relationship psychology
- 5 Reverse psychology or how to inspire an idea in another person
- 6 Reverse psychology in relationships
Relationship psychology between a man and a woman
relationship psychology. Without this knowledge, it is difficult to save a family and avoid numerous conflicts. A happy life depends on whether a person knows how to build relationships with others.
Why study the psychology of relations between a man and a woman?
The ability to build quality relationships is the key to success in most areas of public life. The internal state of any individual depends on communication with others. Whether we realize it or not, the people we live, work with, and just see each other have a huge impact on our lives. A person depends on others. He gets what he deserves from other people. You can achieve love and respect if you know how to communicate with people, how to respond to their actions, how to influence their way of thinking. Without knowledge of psychology, building the right relationships with others will not work.
It is desirable to study the psychology of relations between a man and a woman from psychological books, scientific articles, as well as from personal life experience. No one is immune from mistakes, but you need to be able to take defeats calmly, draw the right conclusions from them. If you analyze your own actions, then you can draw more knowledge from them than from all smart books. You should learn from many problems to single out one, but the most important one and give it maximum attention. If you "spray" on other unimportant matters, then it will not be possible to get out of the vicious circle of problems.
The meaning of the relationship between a man and a woman is a state of love, harmony, physiological, spiritual satisfaction. If a person wants to be truly happy, he must learn to take care of others, to give them the warmth of his soul. It can be difficult for egoists to create a strong family based on love and mutual respect. True, one should sacrifice oneself only for the sake of those who truly deserve it.
It is necessary to remember that not all individuals can be allowed into your soul, not all can be good relations. Close people should be able to take care of each other, help in difficult times, love, despite difficult circumstances. If an individual only takes, but does not give anything in return, perceives kindness as weakness, then any relationship with him is doomed to failure. Not everyone is able to appreciate the efforts of others. Not every individual deserves love, care. A harmonious union is possible only between those people who have the same moral, material, aesthetic, religious values.
Relationships between a man and a woman require concessions. Only in this way can they be preserved for decades to come. A person who stands his ground, does not want to compromise, may lose a loved one. If a woman wants to build a good relationship with a man, her desire alone is not enough. You need to know the psychology of another individual, his needs, way of thinking, desires. Being a woman, you need to enter into the position of a man and vice versa. People who want to be together should be able to hear, negotiate, cooperate with each other.
5 simple rules for a happy union between a man and a woman
Although the people inhabiting our planet are very different, relationships between them are built on the basis of the same rules. If you know them and put them into practice, you can create a strong and happy family. This knowledge will be more useful to women who want to keep their beloved man.
Golden rules of harmonious relationships:
- Support your partner in all his undertakings. Notice even his tiny victories. Never focus on defeat. Believe in the ability of your loved one. Praise him.
- Always ask for help. If a person sees that someone needs him, he feels strong and in demand.
- If a quarrel is inevitable, try not to say too much. In conflict situations, you need to behave calmly. It is necessary to learn to see the problem and try to find a way out of it together.
- Love yourself and become an interesting person. You will be respected only if you value yourself. Love your family and take care of them.
- If you want your partner to know about your feelings, tell him about it. Men can't read other people's minds. They are not inclined to fantasize, and they only hear what they are told.
The psychology of a man in a relationship with a woman is not a secret behind seven locks. Different-looking people want the same thing - love, support, respect. Happy relationships don't come from nowhere, they have to be built to be present. You should always remember that a family is a huge work. A marriage will never fall apart if the partners are patient and able to forgive the mistakes of their loved ones.
What should not be done in a relationship with a man?
If women want to save their marriage, they must not only know how to behave properly with their beloved, but also understand what they should not do. There are three blunders that can ruin everything if you make them. The psychology of the relationship between a man and a woman is too subtle a matter. It is easily torn if people consciously or unconsciously do wrong things, say unnecessary words.
What not to do in a relationship with a man:
- Say that he is a loser. Constantly remind him of mistakes. By plunging a person into a sense of failure, you can permanently discourage him from winning. A man will get used to the idea that he is a loser, and will stop achieving high goals.
- Reject the help of a man and do everything by yourself. If a woman does not ask her partner to help her, she risks being left alone. A man feels his uselessness and goes to the one that cannot do without his support.
- Take on the role of a man. In any pair, one person must be strong and the other weak. If a woman wants to take a dominant position in marriage, to earn more money, she becomes like a man. The stronger sex does not like a subordinate position. Men want to see weak women next to them who need their care.
A happy family and a strong marriage is the dream of many couples. The psychology of relations between a man and a woman is a topic that needs to be studied in detail in order to create a harmonious union. Indeed, in order to have a friendly family, a loving partner, love alone is not enough. You need to know the psychological rules and techniques that will help two loving hearts make life happy.
What are the stages of a relationship between a man and a woman?
Representatives of the weaker and stronger sex think, behave, perceive the world around them differently. Men are more practical, emotionally stable, withdrawn and independent. Women tend to be weaker than the strong half of humanity. The fair sex reacts too emotionally to problems, they need to communicate and talk about their feelings.
Strong relationships in those families in which the husband and wife go about their own business. A man builds a career, a woman takes care of comfort in the house and children. If people turn their attention to a partner and begin to interfere in his affairs, not understanding anything about them, such behavior inevitably leads to conflicts.
A man should be able to live his own life. He needs to distance himself from the emotional experiences of a woman. A loving wife should be able to dissolve in her husband without encroaching on his independence.
A man and a woman can build such relationships between themselves:
- friendly — meet each other, communicate;
- friendly - empathize, support in difficult times;
- love - strong feelings between partners, they want more time to be with their loved ones;
- family - people live together and do housework together.
Relationships between a man and a woman begin for various reasons: because of sympathy, falling in love, the need for sex. Sometimes people consciously get acquainted with representatives of the opposite sex when they see in their chosen one the presence of qualities they like. Any couple dreams of being happy and moving forward towards the realization of their cherished goals. Each partner must invest his strength, knowledge and skills in building a harmonious and lasting union.
Stages of development of relations between a man and a woman:
A boy and a girl get to know each other. Strong feelings flare up between them. Young people are in an elevated state, they idealize their chosen ones, they try to fulfill their every whim. Falling in love lasts about 12 months. During this period, the couple has passionate sex. People do not see each other's shortcomings, they rarely have quarrels, living together brings them satisfaction and happiness.
After some time, the lovers return to reality. They realize that they exaggerated the merits of partners too much. People still love each other, but they want to devote more time to their favorite business, hobbies, entertainment, work, friends.
At this stage, lovers begin to notice some shortcomings of their chosen ones. They try to change the partner, pointing out to him his mistakes. This behavior leads to quarrels and conflicts. If a couple does not have the wisdom to adapt to new conditions, the family ceases to exist.
The partner accepts his chosen one as he is. He endures all his shortcomings, calmly reacts to the difficulties that arise. Having got rid of illusions, people appreciate and respect all individual qualities in their soulmate. Partners are not looking for new connections, but overcome family troubles, take care of their family members.
At this stage, relationships take on a new meaning - people want to give more without demanding anything in return. Partners share their thoughts and experiences with each other. They strive to help their soulmate in all her undertakings, experience sorrows together, work together for a common goal.
- True love.
Partners become really close people. They think the same way, they want the same thing. Each person feels like an accomplished person. In his chosen one, he sees a congenial person who understands all his experiences and dreams without words. True love is respect, care, devotion, mutual understanding. People have experienced many difficulties, they had to suffer a lot, but they realized that the main thing in their life is their union.
Secrets of an ideal relationship
If a man and a woman are united by a common goal, they have every chance to create a strong family. People can improve in one common business or each in his own occupation, but the main thing is not to focus all your attention on the partner’s shortcomings, not to harass him with your reproaches or excessive care.
The psychology of women and men in interpersonal relationships involves the development of personality. People are happy if they are engaged in what they love and can achieve their goals and planned heights in it.
One should not sacrifice a loved one, his dreams for the sake of personal interests. The partner deserves respect. He must realize himself as a person and achieve what he wants in any sphere of human activity.
A harmonious union cannot be built if old grievances are carried over into new relationships. Before you plunge into the world of another person, you need to completely resolve all problems with former lovers.
If an individual is overwhelmed by negative feelings towards his partner, one should not succumb to weaknesses. Emotions need to be able to suppress and control. It is best to switch your attention to work, your favorite pastime. Don't be too critical of your partner's shortcomings. They need to learn to take for granted.
Relationships of trust cannot be built without sincerity and love. It is impossible to build a strong union on false feelings. The chosen one cannot be remade by force, he himself must want to change, having truly fallen in love.
If your relationship has come to a standstill, and even after reading all the advice from the Internet, you do not know how to continue to live, seek help from a psychologist-hypnologist Nikita Valeryevich Baturin. An experienced specialist, a practicing psychotherapist will be able to solve any problem and find a way out of a difficult situation.
Perhaps you can find ways to solve the problem thanks to the video on this channel.
Reverse psychology
Reverse psychology, or reverse psychology, is a term that consists in the occurrence of a directly opposite reaction of a person to an impulse to action, propaganda or education. This peculiar form of manipulation works especially well with children, adolescents, and those individuals who are naturally rebellious and fight for freedom and power mostly out of principle.
How did it come about?
The developer of this theory of motivation is Michael Apter, who, together with his colleagues, has long studied the nature of motivation and explained the duality of human nature. According to Michael, at the same moment a person cannot feel the desire to perform two opposite actions. For example, it is foolish to ask someone for help who is in trouble himself, because the other person's problems are secondary at the moment. Or this example: in a closed group, a person strives to become a part of it, join the others, or choose independence. However, based on the basics of the same reverse psychology, a person can quickly switch from one state to another, and vice versa.
To get the right reaction, the main thing is to choose the right moment and perform a series of actions to induce a person to independently transition to the required state. Reverse psychology in relationships is used in a variety of areas, from politics and marketing to everyday life. Her discoveries are used by the media. For example, taking into account the methods of reverse psychology, employees of advertising companies make predictions about the audience's reaction to advertising, suggest the appearance of rejection and a negative reaction.
Reverse psychology between a man and a woman
Of course, in relations between the sexes, the basics of reverse psychology are also not complete. When a woman needs something from a man, but she is sure that a direct request will cause a negative reaction, she resorts to a trick. For example, wanting to spend the whole weekend with her beloved, but knowing in advance that he was going fishing, hunting or sauna with friends, she tells him something like: “You won’t be home again all weekend, but I’m even glad I use it time to hang out with my best friend and go to a nightclub. ” A man will have a natural desire to stay at home, since he cannot or does not want to let his beloved one go to the club.
If you want to marry the chosen candidate, you should never let him know that you are very interested in this. On the contrary, you need to constantly say how good it is for one, how comfortable an easy relationship is and how pleasant the attention of other men is. A man-owner will not tolerate rivalry and will do everything so that his woman belongs only to him. And so it is in everything, but it must be remembered that reverse psychology in relations with a man does not always work. The latter may be too smart or have a slightly different temperament to fall for this trick.
Books on Reverse Psychology
Actually, the very first book is the work of Michael Apter himself “Beyond Personality Traits. Reverse theory of motivation. The reader will be able to learn the main provisions of the new psychological concept, get an accessible introduction to this theory. On the pages of his book, the author explains why the personality is constantly changing and contradicting itself. Another book by Eric Berne "People who play games." In his work, the author studies interpersonal relations from the perspective of an adult, a child and a parent. He believes that at different times a person can be in any of these three states and, depending on this, build relationships with other people.
Reverse psychology
Reverse psychology as a means of manipulating people of any age
Homer's brain: don't you understand? We must use reverse psychology!
Homer: this is too hard for me.
Homer's brain: ok, don't use reverse psychology then.
Homer: ok, I will!
Last Liked: Total: 24
You tell your subordinates not to do it and they don't do it.
[2]
Reverse psychology
Almost everyone has used the technique that will be discussed today, although most people have not heard anything about reverse psychology. This technique is rarely taught to salespeople and negotiators. Although its effectiveness is confirmed and proven. Today we will tell you what reverse psychology is and how it can be applied in sales.
In some situations, it is natural for a person to reject any proposal from certain subjects. For example, often children reject any requests from their parents, simply because the parents ask. At the same time, a similar request from peers will not cause resistance. About such actions are often said - to do evil. This behavior can be caused by various factors. If you are faced with something like this, you should apply - reverse psychology.
Reverse psychology (psychology from the opposite) is a method of influencing a person, which implies the belief in something, knowing that the reaction will be negative. This technique is most often used in psychology and is called paradoxical intervention. Use reverse psychology effectively in these cases:
- When a person makes decisions based on emotions rather than logic. This often happens in personal relationships between a man and a woman;
- When a person wants to demonstrate his independence and autonomy. Often occurs between children and parents;
- When there is a denial of something or someone on a personal basis. For example, the denial of everything new or your leader.
It is important to note that reverse psychology should not be used too often. Otherwise, this tool will become addictive, and it will simply stop working.
The client will almost always unconsciously and consciously resist the seller's influence. That is why, in sales, reverse psychology can be applied with each client. Moreover, you can include this method in your sales script. Here are a few options for using reverse psychology in sales.
For example, a customer says that the product is too expensive. In response to this, you admit that the product is expensive and that if "you can't call it yourself, we'll pick up something easier." Men peck well at such a bait, especially if a woman tells them to. The effect will intensify if you say this in the presence of another woman. Many will want to show themselves and buy goods to prove their worth. This technique works very well and is applicable in almost any sales. Moreover, there are a lot of options for use and you just need to choose the right one.
If you accidentally show a customer a product that is out of stock or you cannot sell it to him for some other reason. There is a high probability that the client will want this particular product. This is how almost all people are arranged, we want what we cannot. In this case, the seller needs to think about how to present it beautifully to the client.
Below is an example of a sale from the film Boiler Room, where one of the characters says that he cannot sell more than 2000 shares and the client who wanted to buy a couple of hundred shares takes 2000, being upset that it is impossible to buy more.
Ask the client to rate your offer on a scale of 1 to 10. Most clients will give a rating in the range of 6 to 8 (this is the position of neutrals, you can read more in the article about the NPS index). In response to this, you need to be surprised and say that you did not expect a rating of no more than 3-4 points. In response to this, many customers begin to explain to you the logic of such a rating and sell the product to themselves.
Finally, another demonstrative video using reverse psychology.
Reverse psychology in relationships
Reverse psychology is a branch of psychology that suggests using statements to convince a person that are opposite to those that you want to inspire him. Reverse psychology is a fairly simple but effective way of manipulation that will come in handy in any relationship.
So let's look at the steps involved in mastering the science of using reverse psychology.
Step 1 . Correct choice of subject. This method of influence does not work for everyone. The easiest way to be manipulated in this style is a large category of people who do not like to be ordered to do something.
To give an example is simple - adolescents in their transitional age. They will fundamentally not agree with you and will do the opposite, which, in fact, is the basis of this method. And any person with a slightly high self-esteem or a high level of selfishness will be susceptible to the methods of reverse psychology.
Step 2 . The correct state of the subject. The reaction to your manipulations should be thoughtless, and therefore instantaneous and spontaneous. Therefore, wait until your interlocutor begins to show irritability - then the likelihood that he will object to you without much hesitation will be much higher.
Step 3 . From thoughts to actions. When the interlocutor has reached the desired state of agitation, begin to contradict your own point of view. The main thing is not to change the tone of the conversation, otherwise the partner will instinctively pay attention to this. If the tone of the conversation remains the same, then the interlocutor himself will not notice how quickly and ardently he will begin to defend your point of view.
Another version of reverse psychology is to admit defeat. The enemy's ego may begin to put pressure on his conscience and force him to yield himself. Selfish people usually like to show generosity - for them this is another reason for narcissism.
Step 4 . More pressure. Go scream. Directly forbid the interlocutor to do what he just did not want so much. The reaction will definitely be to your advantage.
Step 5 . Accuse the person of lies and weakness. A control shot is a few loud statements offensive to a person. As we remember, we are talking with an egoist, and hurting his personality will make him go to any lengths to prove that you are wrong. The phrase "You never finish your business!" and other similar statements to her will finally defeat the will of the partner.
[3]
Step 6 . Keep your own promises. Many, not seeing the result, immediately give up and change their minds. In no case should you give in - this will only cross out all previous achievements and make the interlocutor more confident that he is right.
If you can't defend your opinion in any situation, it's better not to use reverse psychology: the situation may become even worse. And do not overdo it: such manipulations should in no case lead to a deterioration in your relationship, otherwise they will automatically become meaningless.
There is another method, but it works only in some cases - the direct prohibition method. Directly tell the person: “Don’t do this under any circumstances!” It does not apply to unpleasant or complex things - here the interlocutor will gladly listen to you.
The use of reverse psychology methods is quite effective in almost any relationship. We sincerely hope that this method will help you.
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Psychology of relationships
Psychology of relationships is an extensive branch of psychological science, to which a lot of studies and books are devoted. We communicate with people every day, sometimes successfully, sometimes not. And everyone is concerned about the questions of how to achieve harmony in relationships with the second half or meet a loved one, how to achieve mutual understanding with a child, how to resolve a conflict at work and climb the next step of the career ladder?
These issues are being actively discussed on numerous blogs and forums. Everyone is looking for a recipe for ideal relationships with other people, because a person’s assessment of himself as a person largely depends on this. Conflicts and misunderstandings at work, and even more so in the family, can deprive you of strength and drive you into depression, while attention and support, on the contrary, inspire and help you move forward, live life to the fullest. Do you want it?
The study of the psychology of relationships allows you to understand what drives people, how and why they react to certain events, to learn the patterns of their perception of reality, their behavior and character, the foundations of harmonious communication. Our articles will help to know not only someone else's inner world, but also your own, and therefore reduce the number of contradictions to a minimum.
In the "Psychology of relationships" section you will find articles by experienced psychologists with answers to the most important questions and practical advice. The materials presented below will be useful and interesting to everyone who wants to understand themselves and loved ones, change their relationships and life for the better.
Reverse psychology or how to inspire an idea to another person
In order for a person to do something with pleasure, he must be sure that he himself decided or invented it. There are people who are good at this. And thanks to them, all those strange and unnecessary items appear in your house, and in the wardrobe - things that we would never put on ourselves in our lives. And we're doing things that we didn't seem to want to do.
Video (click to play). |
If you notice you have a new frying pan with a new coating, although your kitchen is virgin, enrolled in some courses or happily support an idea for which yesterday you would never have voted for anything, then someone is already over you then worked.
The art of planting your ideas in other people's minds is called reverse psychology. Reverse psychology (“psychology from the reverse”) is a term describing a psychological phenomenon in which education, propaganda or inclination to a certain action causes a reaction directly opposite to the intended one (opposition or opposition).
This direction gained particular popularity in the 90s, and the main problem was that many people took it too simply, confusing reverse psychology with passive-aggressive behavior. It's like telling the person you want to convince not to skydive that you don't give a damn about risking their life. Well, yes ... even if he breaks his neck, it will be worse for him, but you warned, right ?!
It's like telling the person you want to convince not to skydive that you don't give a damn about risking their life. Well, yes ... even if he breaks his neck, it will be worse for him, but you warned, right ?!
This is a very rough approach! If you really want to convince a person or get him to do something that you need more than him, you need to use a diamond chisel instead of an ax! Much finer work is needed here.
For example, you want to get your neighbor to wash the dishes. Usually we either directly ask, or go, sighing and groaning, and demonstratively rattling plates, we begin to wash them. This option will cause nothing but irritation. In addition, by such behavior, you seem to be hinting that one of you is lazy and dirty.
How to make a person want to do everything himself? You can say something like, “Listen, I'm so tired of washing dishes that I want to start using disposable tableware and I'm going to the store! Really cool?! If you want too, give me some money and I'll buy some sets for you."
You avoided accusations and made the neighbor think about alternatives. If he is not satisfied with disposable dishes, he will have to wash the standard ones.
"Selling" an idea for less is one way to plant your idea in someone else's head.
Let's say you are a salesperson. You sell a hard drive in 250 GB, 500 GB and 1 TB. A customer has come to your store with the intention of buying what they want while spending as little money as possible. All buyers want this - to buy the perfect option for next to nothing. Of course, you are aware of this and cannot immediately offer them to buy a 1TB drive. How to lead a client to a purchase that is profitable for you?
Your dialogue might look something like this:
Customer: Can you tell me about this 260 GB drive? I want to make sure that this is the right option for me.
Salesperson: What kind of computer do you have and what do you want to use it for?
Customer: I have a 2 year old Windows laptop and want to use it to store my photos. I have about 30 GB of photos.
Seller: I think 250GB of storage for your photos will be more than enough. Of course, as long as you use your laptop solely for storing photos. So as long as only photos are stored there, everything will be fine.
In the last sentence, you emphasize that 250 GB is enough just for photos, but if you want to store something else ... And then you can add that to make sure that in the future this disk will be enough for storage of other files, you can buy a more spacious option. After all, you only care about the interests of the buyer, and do not try to sell him something more expensive.
To learn more about persuasion and persuasion manipulation, and how to counter it or how to achieve your goals with it, see the Behavior Hunters section.
Reverse psychology in relationships
Reverse psychology - change yourself, start with denial
Reverse psychology - change yourself, start with denial
Very often people do not accept normal advice that has common sense and received from adequate people. Sometimes their minds challenge the ideas and suggestions of friends and well-wishers. They do everything wrong, often contrary to expectations and requests.
People like to talk about their problems. And often they are not waiting for advice on how to solve them, but are looking for attention, looking for someone who will simply listen to them. That's why advice doesn't work. If we really want to help such people, then we need to look for a different approach.
This is where reverse psychology comes in handy. Try to approach your opponent with the context of expecting a rejection, and you will be surprised that the "bastard" will agree.
And so, here are 50 tips that give food for thought. Use them - and you will never change your life, drive yourself into depression, or even be left alone.
Do the exact opposite of what is given in the tips below and you will be able to develop, change yourself, find motivation to achieve goals and become more open and loved.
***
Did you recognize any of the above in your behavior? If so, then start changing, start doing everything quite the opposite, which is “advised” in this list. And then you will succeed.
Source:
Reverse psychology - change yourself, start with denial
Reverse psychology has an amazing property - it allows you to more soberly look at the world around you. Read 50 tips in the spirit of reverse psychology,
http://presentman.ru/reverse-psychology/
Feedback in business communication
The skill of giving feedback plays a special role in dyadic communication. Under the feedback
communication ( feedback ) in the psychology of communication is understood the information communicated to the respondent about himself, about how he is perceived by the communicator [1] .
Feedback can be neutral, negative, positive. Negative feedback is usually called criticism, positive feedback is called praise. In real business communication, the following feedback problems usually arise:
1) how to communicate negative feedback (criticism) to your partner so that he accepts it and corrects his behavior;
2) how to communicate positive feedback so that it is not perceived as “sycophancy” or courtesy on duty and is really valuable to the respondent.
Feedback can be classified according to form and content.
Analysis of the content of feedback is usually associated with the allocation of various areas of manifestation of the addressee. The following areas are distinguished:
1) business;
2) the sphere of wide communication;
3) sphere of intimate-personal communication;
In business communication, it is most effective to use feedback in relation to the manifestations of the addressee in the business sphere and the sphere of wide communication. The transition to the spheres of intimate-personal communication and the personal sphere is often perceived as an intrusion into the intimate zone and causes resentment, conflicts (in everyday speech it is conveyed by the expression "transition to personalities").
However, for the effectiveness of feedback, it is more important to take into account the form of its submission than the content. Almost any content can be effectively conveyed to the addressee, if you choose the right form.
Consider the general classification of feedback types in terms of the form of its submission (Table 6.2).
First, the feedback is divided into two main types:
1) evaluative, containing the addressee's assessment;
2) descriptive, not containing an assessment, but only describing the behavior or statements of the respondent.
Evaluative feedback, especially negative, often causes rejection of the respondent, reciprocal aggression. Therefore, it should be used sparingly, only when absolutely necessary. Much more effective is descriptive feedback, which does not give an assessment, but only describes the behavior of the respondent. But how do you convey what you don't like about this behavior? For this, such a variant of descriptive feedback as auto-descriptive feedback is used. In this case, the communicator does not give an assessment, but describes his own feelings in connection with the described behavior of the addressee.
Categorical grid of feedback types [2]
Descriptive (descriptive) judgments
Note: arg. - reasoned; nonarg. - unreasoned; generalization-descript. - generalizing-descriptive; concr.-descr. - specific descriptive.
Compare the following options for negative feedback (criticism):
- evaluative feedback: "You are a slacker and lazy, you will not make a good specialist";
- autodescriptive feedback: "When I see that you spend a lot of time on things that are not directly related to your project, I get anxiety about the ability to complete this project on time. "
Which option is more likely to be accepted by the respondent?
Increases the likelihood of accepting feedback and its argumentation. If the feedback contains not just “labels” such as “lazy”, “talentless”, etc., but a detailed argumentation of their attitude, there are more chances that the respondent will listen to it.
The same considerations apply to positive feedback. Praise is always pleasant for a person and does not cause such problems with acceptance as criticism, but still in some cases it may not be accepted by a person - especially when it is insincere or too general: "You are a good person." It's nice, but what exactly is good about me? What needs to be maintained in the future so that others consider me good? Therefore, in the case of praise, a compliment, the use of autodescriptive specific feedback will be the best option.
- evaluative feedback: "You are a good person";
- autodescriptive feedback: "You know, when you smile like that, my mood immediately rises and my soul becomes lighter, it's so nice. "
So, the general rules for giving feedback (both positive and negative) are as follows.
1. Sincerity - you should express your sincere feelings for a person, otherwise the feedback will be perceived as manipulation.
2. Specificity - feedback should contain specific descriptions of the action, behavior, appearance of a person, then it will be useful for him.
3. Non-evaluation - evaluative feedback, especially the use of "labels", reduces its effectiveness, is a conflict generator.
4. Autodescriptiveness - a description of one's feelings in connection with human behavior.
5. Reasoning - giving arguments to support your impression.
- [1] Solovieva O. V. Feedback in interpersonal communication. M.: Publishing House of Moscow State University, 1992. S. 52.
- [2] Solovieva OV Feedback in interpersonal communication. S. 52.
Source:
Feedback in business communication
The skill of giving feedback plays a special role in dyadic communication. Feedback (feedback) in the psychology of communication is understood as information communicated to the respondent about himself, about how with a man. Helps?
Helps, but not always. In order for it to help, certain conditions must be met.
[1]
Do you remember the cartoon about Brer Rabbit and Brer Fox?
Do you remember what the Rabbit said to the Fox?
Just in case, I remind you:
Well, do you remember what Brer Fox does in response to this request?
So it is in relationships.
Don't ask a man to stay if you really want him to stay.
This type of psychology is effective when a teenager in puberty automatically does everything the other way around, or when you have some kind of inveterate stubborn person in front of you, the main thing is just to make you rebuke, but what and how for him from this act will be, so this doesn't matter.
However, if there is even a little thinking person in front of you who is used to making balanced and deliberate decisions, then your strategy will instantly begin to fail, plus you will be in a vulnerable position and begin to split, because in fact you want the opposite. In addition, this is not a very sincere position that makes you yourself a little hypocritical, because it is built on the tactics of deception, and I think it will not work to build strong relationships on it.
Use this strategy if you can't convince the person in front of you, but the result is needed and you know for sure that he usually does the opposite.
Source:
Reverse psychology in relation to a man
Helps, but not always. In order for it to help, certain conditions must be met. Remember the cartoon about Brer Rabbit and Brer Fox? Do you remember what the Rabbit says to the Fox? Just in case
http://www.bolshoyvopros.ru/questions/1645606-reversivnaja-psihologija-v-otnoshenii-s-muzhchinoj-pomogaet.html
Reverse psychology in relationships
Reverse psychology is a branch of psychology that suggests using statements to convince a person that are opposite to those that you want to inspire him. Reverse psychology is a fairly simple but effective way of manipulation that will come in handy in any relationship.
So let's look at the steps involved in mastering the science of using reverse psychology.
Step 1 . Correct choice of subject. This method of influence does not work for everyone. The easiest way to be manipulated in this style is a large category of people who do not like to be ordered to do something.
To give an example is simple - adolescents in their transitional age. They will fundamentally not agree with you and will do the opposite, which, in fact, is the basis of this method. And any person with a slightly high self-esteem or a high level of selfishness will be susceptible to the methods of reverse psychology.
Step 2 . The correct state of the subject. The reaction to your manipulations should be thoughtless, and therefore instantaneous and spontaneous. Therefore, wait until your interlocutor begins to show irritability - then the likelihood that he will object to you without much hesitation will be much higher.
Step 3 . From thoughts to actions. When the interlocutor has reached the desired state of agitation, begin to contradict your own point of view. The main thing is not to change the tone of the conversation, otherwise the partner will instinctively pay attention to this. If the tone of the conversation remains the same, then the interlocutor himself will not notice how quickly and ardently he will begin to defend your point of view.
Another version of reverse psychology is to admit defeat. The enemy's ego may begin to put pressure on his conscience and force him to yield himself. Selfish people usually like to show generosity - for them this is another reason for narcissism.
Step 4 . More pressure. Go scream. Directly forbid the interlocutor to do what he just did not want so much. The reaction will definitely be to your advantage.
Step 5 . Accuse the person of lies and weakness. A control shot is a few loud statements offensive to a person. As we remember, we are talking with an egoist, and hurting his personality will make him go to any lengths to prove that you are wrong. The phrase "You never finish your business!" and other similar statements to her will finally defeat the will of the partner.
Step 6 . Keep your own promises. Many, not seeing the result, immediately give up and change their minds. In no case should you give in - this will only cross out all previous achievements and make the interlocutor more confident that he is right.
If you can't defend your opinion in any situation, it's better not to use reverse psychology: the situation may become even worse. And do not overdo it: such manipulations should in no case lead to a deterioration in your relationship, otherwise they will automatically become meaningless.
There is another method, but it works only in some cases - the direct prohibition method. Directly tell the person: “Don’t do this under any circumstances!” It does not apply to unpleasant or complex things - here the interlocutor will gladly listen to you.
Video (click to play). |
Using the methods of reverse psychology is quite effective in almost any relationship. We sincerely hope that this method will help you.
Sources
-
David, E. Scharff Sexual relations. Sex and family from the point of view of the theory of object relations / David E. Scharff. - M .: Kogito-Centre, 1982. - 497 p. -
Tsiporkina, I. Domestic diplomacy, or How to establish relations between parents and children / I. Tsiporkina, E. Kabanova. - M .: AST-Press Book, 2006. - 304 p. -
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