My husband left the house
7 Things to Do When Your Husband Leaves You
In This Article
Divorce, in itself, is a pretty painful experience, you are, in a way, rearranging your life. Some people depend so heavily on their spouses that they feel incomplete and lost without that safety net. God forbid if someone’s life has come to this stage what should they do? Lock themselves in a room and barricade from society? No. Although marriage, family, kids, are and forever will be one of the most important parts of your personality, you had a life before all that as well. Do not limit yourself. Do not stop living because of one incident.
Following are a handful of things you can do to rejuvenate your life and start living for yourself and for a happier and healthier you:
1. Do not beg
It can be earth-shattering to some, especially if you had not paid attention to all the signs, to hear about your spouse asking for a divorce. To say that you feel heartbroken would be the understatement of the century. The feeling of betrayal would last a while.
You are entitled to ask about the reasons but, one thing that you should never, ever do is beg for the reversal of their decision.
If your spouse is asking for a divorce, it means that they have put some serious thought into it. There is nothing that you can do at that point in time that is going to change their decision. Do not resort to begging. It would only lower your value.
2. Protect your family
There will be plenty of time to mourn. As soon as you hear the word ‘Divorce’ find a suitable lawyer. Whether or not you have kids, you certain rights given to you by your country.
Be it an annual allowance, or child support, or alimony, or mortgage. It is your right to demand them.
Find a good lawyer and protect you and your family’s future.
3. Do not hold it in
It is natural to be angry. Angry at the world, at the universe, at family, friends, and most importantly, angry at yourself.
How could you have been so blind? How did you let this happen? How much of it was your fault?
The worst thing that you could do to yourself at this point is hold everything in. Listen, you need to vent. You need to think of yourself, for your sanity, let it all out.
Couples going through a divorce, mostly because of either their kids or family, retract their emotions and tears and hold them in. This is not at all healthy, for the mind or the body.
Before you let go of the relationship, of your love, of the betrayal, you have to come to terms with it. You have to mourn. Mourn the death of the love you thought would last forever, mourn the spouse that you could not be, mourn the person you thought you knew, mourn the future that you dreamt with your children together.
4. Keep your head, standards, and heels high
Finding about the severance of a bond as strong as marriage can be heartbreaking, all on its own but it can be downright humiliating if your spouse left you for someone else.
You were busy running the house, keeping the family together, planning family events, whereas your spouse was fooling around behind your back and looking for ways to spring up divorce.
Everyone gets it, your life has turned into a giant ball of mess. You don’t have to be one as well.
Do not go all crazy and hunt the second family down. Keep your head high and try to move on.
You should never prolong your stay at a place where you are not wanted in the first place.
5. Do not play the blame game
Do not start rationalizing everything and analyzing every dialogue, decision, suggestion until to the point where you finally have enough to put the blame on.
Things happen. People are cruel. Life is unfair. It is not all your fault. Learn to live with your decisions. Accept them.
6. Give yourself time to heal
The life you had known and loved and were comfortable with is gone.
Instead of breaking into pieces and giving the world a free show, pull yourself together.
Your marriage is over, your life is not. You are still very much alive. There are people who love you and care about you. You have to think of them. Ask their help and give yourself time to heal and fix the damage.
7. Fake it till you make it
It will, definitely, be a tough pill to swallow.
But at times of desperation make ‘fake it till you make it’ your mantra.
Your mind is very open to suggestions, if you will lie to it enough, it will start to believe the lie and thus will be the birth of a new reality.
Share this article on
Share this article on
8 Things to Do Immediately When Your Husband Leaves You
By Jennifer Ball-Tufford
What do you do when your husband leaves you?
If you’re headed towards divorce, please keep this in mind: Hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. I wish you the best.
I check my articles analytics often and am blown away by how many women end up here by typing in, “What to do when your husband leaves you”.
Literally, hundreds a day. They end up here because of the first article I wrote for DivorcedMoms about What To Do When Your Husband Leaves You.
I wrote that one kind of tongue in cheek, it contains some very real advice but as I read over it now, I realize when you are in that zombie-like state right after you’re abandoned, you may not want to read about how much fun it is to have sex as a single woman or how the Divorce Diet is real.
You want advice, serious advice, advice you can hold onto and if you want, wear it like a Superman cape to give you strength. You want to know that you’re not the only one who has felt this way, not the only one with so many different feelings and thoughts ricocheting through your brain that you’re half-convinced one will shoot out of your skull and accidentally boink someone else.
So here is my stab at “Part Two:What To Do When Your Husband Leaves You”.
Read this one if he’s just left, or maybe he’s left and come back a time or two.
Read this one when you know it’s over.
Read this one before you sign your decree.
Read this one if he stops paying child support or alimony.
First off, here’s a high 5, or if you’re not creeped out by stranger hugs, a big fat hug.
I’m proud of you for getting this far. I hope that you have surrounded yourself with good friends (you only need one or two to get you through this, but don’t be surprised if you find yourself with many more).
I hope you realize or are starting to realize, just how strong and amazing you are. I hope you have properly mourned the death of your marriage, and if you’re still in the grieving stages, you have my heartfelt condolences.
You will be ok.
So let’s do this.
1. Save every single email, every single text, every single note you get from your husband.If I had done this, things may have turned out a little bit differently for me. Mine promised to pay all of my attorney fees.
He promised to pay for my health insurance. He promised to do lots of things that never came to be. In fact, some of the things he promised, he ended up fighting and trying to do the exact opposite. If I had saved some of his earlier emails, it may have helped. Don’t just save them in a file on your computer. Print them out. Every single one.
At the very, very least, you will have some interesting reading material when all is said and done. I like the ones where mine just plain old lies his ass off, and the one where he obviously hit the keyboard after hitting the bottle and went on and on about regret and apologies and how the person he ended up with isn’t “anything special”. Those aren’t going to do squat for me in court, but they do reinforce the fact that I am infinitely better off without him.
2. Hire the best attorney you can afford.Beg, borrow, sell whatever you can live without (tools, golf clubs, and other boy toys sell really well on Craigslist.
Just sayin). Ask any friends you have who are attorneys, or who are married to one or roomed in college with one. Get loans from family. Try contacting organizations in your city that help women in crisis or community groups that help low-income people. They may be able to lead you to an attorney who will help you free of charge, or who will allow you to make payments.
You need someone who has experience with divorce, and lots of it. My first attorney was ok. She was cheap, and she had some prior experience. But she let a lot of stuff get past her, stuff that ended up costing me lots of money in the long run.
Another thing to keep in mind: unless your attorney was a good friend prior to the divorce, they aren’t your buddy. They may be awesome, they may be super friendly, and they may kick total ass at their job, but at the end of the day, you are simply a source of income to them.
You need to make sure that you keep tabs on what’s going on, double check the information that they have about you, your income, your expenses, etc.
And just a heads up: once you’re out of money, you’re out an attorney. It’s not a case of them being a-holes or scoundrels, it’s just business. But after sitting in someone’s office weeping into tissues for a couple of months, you kind of form a quasi-friendship feeling about them. You have to get over that.
Have a friend read it too, or your mom or dad or anyone who isn’t going through a divorce. In our first MTA, my ex somehow got to claim all four kids for taxes. Yes, that’s right: he leaves, doesn’t spend more than 4 whole days a month with them, and then wanted to claim them on his taxes?
He also wanted to claim the mortgage interest on our house which he hadn’t lived in for 2 years. He got away with these things for a year. And then I got them changed. Stand up for yourself, even at the risk of sounding like a harpy in your attorney’s office.
Question everything. YOU are the customer in this relationship. Write down questions that pop into your head in the middle of the night, send an email or leave a message. The things you do now will determine your quality of life in the near (and far) future. Don’t sit back and assume that others will look out for you. They will, of course, but you need to be in charge of your destiny. You must grow some balls and become your number one advocate. You can do it!
DON’T FORGET TO READ THE FINAL MTA BEFORE YOU SIGN IT!
Take as long as you need, don’t let anyone rush you. You sit down, and you read every last word. Some attorneys have been known to sneak in some changes between the last draft and the final, official MTA. Check things carefully: holiday schedules, length and amount of alimony/child support, who claims the kids for taxes, who’s responsible for what marital debt, etc. Your attorney should be with you when you sign it, to go over it with you. If that’s not possible, bring a friend who is familiar with your situation.
You and your kids are young right now. But that’s going to change. You need to think about your retirement. When I got divorced, my husband had one small 401k, which we had to split, and part of it had to be used for some overdue tax payment. That shouldn’t have happened. It should have been mine, the tax payment should have been his responsibility. I essentially got nothing.
It was like I worked at a job for twelve years, gave it everything I had, sacrificed my youth and got nothing. No retirement, no severance package, no going away party with cake and balloons. Nothing. Make sure you get something for your part in the marriage.
And your kids. At this moment the biggest expense may be shoes and camp, but as they grow, so do their bills. School supplies are spendier (hello? Graphing calculators for three kids?). Sports will become prohibitively expensive. They will need driving lessons, behind the wheel classes, they’ll need to take their driver’s license test and there will be car insurance and gas money (not to mention a car to drive).
They’ll have to pay for college entrance tests and COLLEGE.
Make sure all of this is addressed in your MTA. All of it. Don’t worry about sounding petty. Make damn sure that your soon-to-be ex is assigned at least half of these expenses. This was one of my biggest mistakes. None of this was even touched on in my MTA, and now I have 3 teens, two who should be driving but I can’t afford the classes. And considering that their father won’t pony up $100 for new eyeglasses, they won’t even ask about this stuff. Don’t let this happen to you.
He’s also responsible for their health insurance. Which he did take care of, for a while. Then he switched them all over to New Wife’s insurance, which sucks. In my humble opinion, they chose the absolute worst package available. I don’t know if it was a subtle way to say, “Screw you” to me or if they are truly the most miserly people on the planet, but it sucks. Some crazy high deductible, so high that I cannot afford to take my kids to the doctor.
We’ve had to wait out ear aches and put off well-child examinations until I can afford to pay for the whole visit.
We lost our awesome dentist because mid-way through a batch of appointments, my ex switched the insurance to a group that wouldn’t pay. That bill was in my name (he would never agree to be the guarantor…get that in your MTA, too!!) and it’s being lumped in with my bankruptcy. Now I have to face this dentist, who is a family friend, at school events and even though she knows it’s not my fault I still feel like a deadbeat.
I was surprised to find out that you can go back and have the terms of the decree reviewed by the courts, and quite possibly have them modified if they are unreasonable. I found this out because I did the next thing:
5. Research. And read the fine print.You have the internet. Spend some time researching divorce cases in your county. You will be amazed at what you find. One thing you will learn is that nothing in a divorce decree is etched in stone.
It can all be changed, it can all be modified, it can all be worked around. There are more loopholes in an MTA than there are in a latch-hook rug kit.
If my ex-husband was able to go back and have his child support obligation reduced to zero dollars a month, you can bet there are loopholes. It’s a matter of finding facts to support your claims, keeping good records and again, having the right attorney.
As far as my case goes, yes, he was able to do that. But…and there’s always a big but, isn’t there? But I have done my research. I’ve gone through our MTA and found that there are certain conditions that had to have been met in order for some of the waivers and claims to stand up in court. Conditions that haven’t been met…or were met, but only for a bit. These are the loopholes you’ll be glad to find. Trust me on this one.
This next one is tough, but if I had done this…oh my. Life would be much different for me and the kids.
6. Dump the house.Or at least consider it.
Look at your mortgage on the marital home, really look at it. We had three mortgages, which I had “kind of sort of” known about prior to the divorce but didn’t really think about it until I became solely responsible for the payments. Can you afford it? Is it going to go up? Are your property taxes affordable? How about the utilities like water and sewer and recycling? Add up your utilities and what you pay to maintain your home, include everything right down to how much you spend on gas for your lawnmower. How many years are left on your mortgage? Can you do it on your own?
I don’t care how much you get in alimony or child support, pretend that’s not there (because sadly, out of 6 million women who are owed child support every year in the U.S., 2 1/2 million don’t get it). Can you cover it? Unless you have a pretty good job and a smaller mortgage, you won’t be able to do it. The house is the number one biggest piece of marital debt in most divorces. Don’t let it become all yours.
When my husband left, he left me with close to $300,000.00 in-house debt. He moved in with his girlfriend almost immediately and closed on their new house (with a pool!) within a week or two after our divorce was finalized. They tied the knot less than a year later and are now expecting a baby (his fifth child. Seriously.).
My milestones haven’t been so sweet…I’ve gone through the humiliation of being left, the shame of foreclosure, the embarrassment of bankruptcy. My children and I are working through everything, and in the end, I’m sure we’ll all come out stronger people for it.
But, if I had been able to avoid even one of the many hurdles I’ve had to jump over the past few years, it would have made everything just a little bit easier. That’s why I’m writing this down, that’s why I’m exposing my past and my mistakes and my moments of bad judgment.
If I can help just one of you get through this and end up with fewer battle scars than I have, it will be worth it.
I’m not an attorney, I’m not an expert, I’m not qualified or certified or accredited by any branch of the gnarled legal tree. I’m an average, everyday woman, a woman who married a guy had kids with him and went along with everything he said. I’m a woman who trusted a man with her life and realized too late that it was a mistake.
Oh, and one more thing:
7. Don’t have sex with your ex.Based on my experience, and the experiences of other divorced women I’ve talked to, this is fairly commonplace. They come back. They come back with hard-ons and crocodile tears and sometimes a bottle of wine. They crawl back into your bed and whisper to you about how they’re sorry and they’re lonely and they miss you. They do this even with a younger piece of ass waiting for them at their bachelor pad, sometimes they’ve even married this piece of ass and yet, there they are at your front door.
Don’t let them in. Not into your house, not into your bed, not into you.
Sure, at first, it’s nice. You close your eyes and the shitstorm that has become your life dissipates for a few minutes. You have your man back where he belongs, and you think, just for a bit, that you’ve won. Everything is going to be all better.
But it’s not. When he’s done, he leaves. He may stay overnight, but more than likely he’ll go home to whatever or whoever is waiting for him. Just like you used to wait for him. You’ll be left feeling used, feeling cheap and wearing the stench of bad decisions and regret like some cheap body spray from Walgreens. Don’t do it.
Ok, I lied, TWO more things:
8. What if he stops paying child support/spousal maintenance?First thing; don’t panic. I mean, yes, you can panic a little bit because things like bills, electricity, gas for your car and food for your kids can’t be paid for with wishes and dreams, so yeah. You can panic about that. But you’ll get through that. Trust me, I fed four kids and kept the lights on with about $700.
00 a month for a while. You are tough, and this will be one of the times you prove it.
But in the long run, don’t panic. This is one example of the law being on your side. If a man owes child support and/or spousal maintenance and doesn’t pay it, it’s going to haunt him. Unless he goes all Unabomber and slides off the grid, his social security number, name, address and all that good stuff will be flagged. He will have problems getting loans, getting credit cards, buying a car…hell, he may find his auto insurance rates go up overnight.
You have to make sure you file the correct paperwork with your county, however. The first time he’s late or misses a payment, you can call your county’s Family Court division and ask about collecting child support. There is a certain length of time that you’ll need to wait (it has to be a certain number of days/weeks overdue before the county can step in and pursue it) but it won’t hurt to have the paperwork all ready to go.
This is another instance where you need to keep diligent records.
If he tosses you some cash, record the amount and date. A check? Photocopy. Promises to do it? Get it in writing. Keep the voicemail.
Past due child support and alimony cannot be dismissed no matter what. Not if he files bankruptcy, not if he loses his job, not if he becomes incapacitated and unable to work. And no, if he remarries and Wife #2 (or 3, or 4…) has a good job, her income cannot be touched. If she has a heart or soul, she’ll help the poor man provide something for his kids, but her income is off limits as far as legally collecting support in arrears.
Even if your ex is purposely under-employed or is able to hide some of the money he makes or under-report it, the courts will only look at his income when determining the amounts and collecting the arrearages.
However…courts will look at all of his available resources when determining some of this. And having someone else who has been and is able to continue helping with the household expenses is definitely a resource.
But this isn’t something I know too much about, just relaying what I’ve read elsewhere. Situations like this are best left for your attorney, and someone else who you may get to know (and love, just a little) …a forensic accountant. Expensive, but they can make or break your case. If it’s suggested you use one, and you are able? Go for it.
And that’s all I have for now. Hang in there.
Jennifer Ball-Tufford writes about divorce and its aftermath, parenting teens and what it’s like to have Michelle Duggar hair on her blog, The Happy Hausfrau. When she’s not binge-watching t.v. series on Netflix she can be found teaching preschoolers how to build awesome block forts. She lives in Minneapolis with her four fantastic children and Walter, the best dog in the world. Find her on Facebook and Twitter. www.happyhausfrau.blogspot.com
This blog post first appeared on DivorcedMoms.com
Husband left and filed for divorce: reason and personal experience of divorced couples | v1.
ru Many men list femininity as the main qualities of a woman. It turns out that everyone understands different features by it
Photo: Shutterstock.com
Share
There are still quite a few men in Russia with a classic, patriarchal view of the family. They are ready to be the main and only earners and are looking for women who are beautiful and gentle, with meek manners and not burdened with unnecessary career ambitions. It would seem that if they meet one with the other, an idyll will come, but this is not always the case. Our reader got married 5 years ago, and recently got divorced, surprising all his friends a lot. After all, his wife was a real beauty and the embodiment of femininity. The story of one divorce was recorded by our colleagues from Wday.ru.
A few months ago, a man decided to end a marriage that had lasted 5 years. In a chivalrous way, he left his wife Lilya an apartment bought a few years before marriage.
He took only personal belongings and a dog. For the wife, the man’s decision to break up with her was a complete surprise, she called her ex-mother-in-law for several more weeks and tried to influence her husband through her, and then disappeared.
Seva rented an apartment, but his relatives knew that he left the family not for another, as his ex-wife thought for a long time, but simply to nowhere. Friends were surprised, in their opinion, the man looked younger and, despite a completely simple life, looked very happy.
“Divorce did not change my mind about the institution of the family,” our hero explained. - I am still sure that a man should not be alone, that there must be a woman next to him: a beloved, faithful friend, the mother of his children. I got married late. I was looking for someone I would like to live with for the rest of my life. Like any experienced bachelor, I had certain requirements for my soulmate. In the first place among the advantages of a potential wife, I put femininity.
It seemed to me that only next to such a woman would I be able to realize myself as a man. He shied away like the devil from incense from emancipated persons who would not climb into their pocket for a strong word. Overly self-sufficient and categorical ladies, occupying prominent positions and earning big money, were also uninteresting to me.
Seva confessed that he was attracted only to those women whose manners were as far from masculine as possible. He recalled the first meeting with his now ex-wife - she was beautiful, tender, somehow childishly defenseless. Next to such a woman, he felt like an almighty head of the family, who could not care less about any problems. But time passed, and the man began to understand that this medal has another side.
— Even the strongest and most self-confident person has moments of weakness or at least ill health when he himself needs help and complicity. But I couldn’t afford it: Lilechka firmly “driven” into the role of my favorite toy and was not going to “leave” it.
It suited her that I completely took over not only providing for the family, which is completely normal, but also the lion's share of household chores. Paying bills, filling the refrigerator, organizing leisure activities - almost all family problems were not common, but mine, - recalls Seva.
Lilya, according to her husband's recollections, saw taking care of her appearance as her main task. Massage, manicure, pedicure, hair stylist, visits to the dressmaker and regular shopping - these things required time, effort and attention. Sometimes the woman did the cleaning and cooking, but because of the lack of experience, everything came out. Basically, the couple ate in a cafe or bought ready-made food.
— Lilya constantly complained that she was physically very weak and needed more rest. I did not limit her in this matter: it is necessary - it means it is necessary. Somehow, she and her friend took a ticket to a health resort, and a couple of days before her departure, I fell down with a severe flu.
So Lilechka quickly packed her suitcase and lived with a friend before leaving, so as not to pick up an infection from me in front of the sanatorium, Seva recalls the details of her family life.
Influenza did not pass without a trace then, after it bilateral pneumonia began. The doctor prescribed the man a hospital at home so that the weakened body would not acquire any nosocomial infection. Friends went to the store for medicines and to the store: Lilya, having learned that her husband was very ill, did not interrupt the rest. Seva was unpleasantly surprised by this indifference, according to him, he would have acted differently in relation to his ill wife.
— And then we got a dog. The initiative belonged to Lila: while walking in the park, she saw a "mi-mi-bear" puppy and got the idea to get the same one. I was against it: I understood that a dog is primarily not a toy, but a great responsibility. But the wife kept repeating, like a child: “I want! Want! Want!" — and I gave up.
So we got Alma, ”recalls the man.
The dog in the house helped to understand that the marriage in the form that it was could no longer exist. Seva's wife was not ready either for puddles in the apartment, or for gnawed shoes, or for the need to feed the animal by the hour. As a result, walking, food, visits to the veterinarian - all this fell exclusively on the man. Seva loved the dog and did not complain. Fatal for the family was the decision to allow Alma to become a mother. Six puppies knocked life out of its usual rhythm. The babies and the newly-born mother demanded attention, so Seva moved the dog's bedding to the matrimonial bedroom.
- All this fuss terribly strained my wife. Every night she began to whimper that she did not get enough sleep, and then with a blanket and a pillow she moved to the sofa in the living room. “And when we have a baby, will you also go to sleep in another room?” one of our readers asked. “My wife said that a child is a completely different matter.
But her words did not convince me.
After that, the man seriously thought about the prospects of having children. He realized that there is already one child in the family who is absolutely not going to grow up and become more independent and less selfish. In this scenario, dreaming about children is preparing in advance for the role of both a father and a nursing mother. And Seva, for a start, wanted to play the role of a beloved husband, who is taken care of, and not only burdened with her problems. Then he decided, before it was too late, to leave and change his life.
— As expected, my wife took my decision as a betrayal. She didn't even want to hear that I was tired of babysitting a healthy young woman. Probably, if at that moment she said that she would try to change something in herself so that both of us would be comfortable in our relationship, I would have stayed. But she began to fight in hysterics and frantically search for a lovebird. That was enough to finally decide to leave, the man concludes.
“Life with Lily taught me to distinguish true femininity from banal coquetry, and female weakness from terry selfishness. I still think that a woman is more attractive the less she resembles a man in her behavior. But now I don’t buy into the position “married means a husband.” A family is a union of two, and not officially fixed patronage of one spouse over another. Femininity and caring for your neighbor are not mutually exclusive concepts.
“Is it normal for a family to get divorced?” - this is the question we asked the family psychologist Anna Berdnikova.
Anna Berdnikova — supervisor cafe psychology and pedagogy of the MAOU OC "Gornostai", consultant of the clinic "Insight" and the site "Sibmama".
- The modern Russian family can be called less stable compared, for example, with the family of the last or the century before last. This is due primarily to the fact that the family has ceased to be a necessary condition for mass survival. Today, a person, regardless of gender, is quite capable of living alone, providing himself with the solution of those tasks that the family used to deal with, either independently or through outsourcing, the expert explains.
According to Anna, the creation, preservation and development of family relationships is a daily physical and emotional work, effort. This work is now quite avoidable, so the age of marriage is rising and the duration of marriage is falling. The infantilization of society is also growing: to live here and now, to listen to your desires, to be worthy of everything and at once - these are wonderful calls, but they show life from a childish position as the greatest good.
— When a couple creates a family, in order for the family to last and develop longer, someone, at least one, must take an adult position, be in contact with reality, and not just with their desires. In addition, the family is a structure in which not just two people meet, each with their own cockroaches. In a young family, there are two family systems of newlyweds, says the psychologist.
The expert explains that each of the partners has his own picture of a happy family life in his head, his own family rules, which, of course, must be implemented.
- In the candy-bouquet period of time, it never occurs to anyone to talk about what rules we will live by - hello to the conviction that "if love is real, then lovers understand each other without words." And there are a huge number of questions that would not hurt to discuss on the shore: how household duties are distributed, how the family budget is formed, how our leisure time will be organized, who will pay for it, what family savings are, how they will be formed and what to spend, how often our parents will visit us ... This is only a small part of the things that, without being agreed, will again and again give rise to family conflicts, Anna concludes.
“My husband hasn't been around for an hour, but I'm already starting”: revelations of an experienced traitor — she told why she was drawn to the left.
“I left her and have no regrets”: revelations of a groom who left his bride on their wedding day — experts explained why this happens.
“At 60 I was crazy about being alone”: 3 candid stories of childless women over 40 (two of them are quite happy).
Husband just leaves home
#1
#2
#3
9000 #4
Guest
22222 If you can live without him, file for divorce and alimony. Further it will be worse.
#5
#6
#7
muzhlo
As I understand it, the author shits on her husband's head and wants him not to be offended.
To "take a joke" and "make fun". So that in response to humiliation, he grimaces like a clown. A typical situation for a sow born in the Russian Federation. Now she has all the means for blackmail: alimony, and "you will not see the child" and all the courts are on her side, she can now show the serf where his place is. And in which case find a "new dad". The next RSP-shit is planned.
#8
#9
man
As I understand it, the author shits on her husband's head, and wants him not to be offended. To "take a joke" and "make fun". So that in response to humiliation, he grimaces like a clown. A typical situation for a sow born in the Russian Federation. Now she has all the means for blackmail: alimony, and "you will not see the child" and all the courts are on her side, she can now show the serf where his place is.
And in which case find a "new dad". The next RSP-shit is planned.
#10
#12
yes, 9002 male 9002 A tyrant who flees. Well, about "not interested" I did not doubt. Any CPR will tell you the same thing about the father of the child. Like "drank, beat, cheated" - this is your Axiom.
#13
male
In reality, a woman breaks up families in 9 cases out of 10. In 1 case out of 10, the husband files for divorce under the influence of women's manipulations. Judging by what you write, you have already decided to divorce for a long time, and this is a long-planned event for you. Maybe you originally married and went for a child with alimony.
To give birth for yourself, your (and only your) child, and breed a sucker for some security during the maternity period, and of course alimony. Passive income. It was lucky to find a fool, like many other RSP boors in 70 cases out of 100, but this will not continue indefinitely.
#14
male
In reality, a woman breaks up families in 9 cases out of 10. In 1 case out of 10, the husband files for divorce under the influence of women's manipulations. Judging by what you write, you have already decided to divorce for a long time, and this is a long-planned event for you. Maybe you originally married and went for a child with alimony. To give birth for yourself, your (and only your) child, and breed a sucker for some security during the maternity period, and of course alimony. Passive income. It was lucky to find a fool, like many other RSP boors in 70 cases out of 100, but this will not continue indefinitely.
#16
#17
In reality, Babier ruins families in 9 cases out of 10. In 1 case from 1 case from 1 case from 10 the husband files for divorce under the influence of women's manipulations. Judging by what you write, you have already decided to divorce for a long time, and this is a long-planned event for you. Maybe you originally married and went for a child with alimony. To give birth for yourself, your (and only your) child, and breed a sucker for some security during the maternity period, and of course alimony. Passive income. It was lucky to find a fool, like many other RSP boors in 70 cases out of 100, but this will not continue indefinitely.
#18
Author
What kind of alimony? What is the income? Who are you talking about? Maybe this is how socially neglected people live and give birth to children this way, I did not check it.
I married my husband and gave birth because I love my husband. And we were planning a baby. If I had made the decision to divorce a long time ago, I would not have endured all this and would not have forgiven. I do everything at home and do not start myself. But excuse me, with your conclusions, you would forgive your 2nd half, which is not clear where it is for 5 nights in a row. I don't think.
#19
male
And so you already divorced him. Well, why then suck on a fait accompli. Are you looking for an excuse? I'll tell you why he didn't ask. Because when a woman sees that a man is interested in a child, to spite him, she tries to restrict access. What do you say it doesn't happen? Full of such cases. And would you, knocking on the thresholds like a beggar, ask something else about your child there, after you were thrown out, like a more unnecessary waste product? Here she gave birth, right there the juvenile woman selects the child and transfers it to the paying parents, now it is only their child.
You would be, like an annoying fly under their threshold, whining "how is my baby?". And to you: Fuck you, bum, you're not here!
#20
#21
#22
AU
2222 Yes, she already talked about divorce and yelled a couple of times. Not afraid of infection now. This time he filed in public services, he received a notification that he needed to fill out his part. He took and removed. Screaming to go to court. Leaving my passport tore and marriage certificate. You read my thoughts, but it doesn't affect him anymore. And she talked about her departure. But he knows that I won’t leave the baby with him, he will sleep as if under sleeping pills.
I got up 5 times for all the time, but considers myself a father-heroine. This is the 2nd day I haven't written. And his trail is gone. He doesn't give a damn about us, stupidly don't care. But the weekend. I'm still winding myself up, which may not be sitting there in the gorge like before. Who knows, maybe he already decided on some feats. I just don’t understand if he doesn’t give a damn or did he arrange training?
#23
#24
is called Astro_diana. Now he just insults, apologizes, then insults again. And then he starts raising his hand.
It shouldn't be like that. Such relationships are not normal. You and your daughter deserve love and care. But until you yourself realize this, nothing will change.
Woman.
ru experts
-
Galimov Ildar
Family psychologist
121 answers
-
Ekaterina Nesterenko
Psychologist
1 answer
-
Maxim Sorokin
Practicing psychologist
651 answer
-
Alla Buraya
Psychologist
45 answers
-
Maria Burlakova
Psychologist
120 answers
-
Nikita Nosov
Practicing psychologist
34 answers
-
Vera Vladimirovna Zolotykh
Psychologist
141 answers
-
Julia Lekomtseva
Cosmetologist
248 answers
-
Rogovtsova Natalia
Nutritionist, gastroenterologist
2 answers
-
Vyacheslav is rich
Certified practitioner.
.. 317 responses
#25
man
Yes, and as usual on this forum, all the most interesting things start to surface later. When it is already clear that the topic has merged, and something urgently needs to be completed.
#26
man this comb does not fit.
#27
Author
It would be better if it was an essay, believe me, or stupidly the same reasoning as yours about all women. If anything comes up, then only the details of his departure and the fact that he yells, this is not for your delicate psyche. He himself says that he does not remember half of what he screams and admits that the reason is just laughter.
There are few such people, the first time I see and hear this.
#28
man
Yes, and as usual on this forum, all the most interesting things start to surface later. When it is already clear that the topic has merged, and something urgently needs to be completed.
Unreliable stories
-
I am infuriated by my husband with his children and grandchildren ...
492 Reply
-
The man immediately warned that all property was recorded for children
583 Reply to
9000 -
A lie 22 years long How to destroy?
705 responses
-
Husband left, 2 months of depression... How will you cope if you are left all alone?
Reply
Such a salary - I do not want to work
389 answers
#29
#30
Author
Yes, I already talked about divorce and yelled a couple of times.
Not afraid of infection now. This time he filed in public services, he received a notification that he needed to fill out his part. He took and removed. Screaming to go to court. Leaving my passport tore and marriage certificate. You read my thoughts, but it doesn't affect him anymore. And she talked about her departure. But he knows that I won’t leave the baby with him, he will sleep as if under sleeping pills. I got up 5 times for all the time, but considers myself a father-heroine. This is the 2nd day I haven't written. And his trail is gone. He doesn't give a damn about us, stupidly don't care. But the weekend. I'm still winding myself up, which may not be sitting there in the gorge like before. Who knows, maybe he already decided on some feats. I just don’t understand if he doesn’t give a damn or did he arrange training?
#32
Guest
What does 35 years have to do with it? I also got married at 35, nothing, I already have three children.
Sometimes, of course, they quarreled, but they tried to put up as quickly as possible. By the way, my wife calms down after a quarrel longer than me, but still, we put up. It's not about age, it's such a psychotype. Author0002 Yes, I already talked about divorce and yelled a couple of times. Not afraid of infection now. This time he filed in public services, he received a notification that he needed to fill out his part. He took and removed. Screaming to go to court. Leaving my passport tore and marriage certificate. You read my thoughts, but it doesn't affect him anymore. And she talked about her departure. But he knows that I won’t leave the baby with him, he will sleep as if under sleeping pills. I got up 5 times for all the time, but considers myself a father-heroine. This is the 2nd day I haven't written. And his trail is gone. He doesn't give a damn about us, stupidly don't care. But the weekend. I'm still winding myself up, which may not be sitting there in the gorge like before.
Who knows, maybe he already decided on some feats. I just don’t understand if he doesn’t give a damn or did he arrange training?
#36
man
Depends on what you "tricked" on, after which he left. It's just that people don't leave home for 5 days. May 31, 2021
#38
Guest
You will not fix anything! He doesn't respect you at least. This is how the nerves of a nursing mother wind up, and during pregnancy it’s just the bottom, it also tears up the documents and so insults! As a maximum, he has mental problems. Shit, on which you can not rely on anything! Collect your thoughts that this person is not yours - does not love and does not respect! Stop being nervous! Probably here you need to go through all the stages - from morally killed, and this expectation when he will marry, to the realization that you are an empty place for him and there will be no other way.
Perhaps, humiliating you, he asserts himself. Divorce is the only way out. He specifically mocks you - he sees that all this is not indifferent to you. But if you pretend that you don’t care if you left or came, then beatings can also be connected. And it seems to me that you will not leave this psycho so easily.
#39
Guest
You won't fix anything! He doesn't respect you at least. This is how the nerves of a nursing mother wind up, and during pregnancy it’s just the bottom, it also tears up the documents and so insults! As a maximum, he has mental problems. Shit, on which you can not rely on anything! Collect your thoughts that this person is not yours - does not love and does not respect! Stop being nervous! Probably here you need to go through all the stages - from morally killed, and this expectation when he will marry, to the realization that you are an empty place for him and there will be no other way.
Perhaps, humiliating you, he asserts himself. Divorce is the only way out. He specifically mocks you - he sees that all this is not indifferent to you. But if you pretend that you don’t care if you left or came, then beatings can also be connected. And it seems to me that you will not leave this psycho so easily.
New topics
-
Is it possible or not worth it to forgive a husband
7 answers
-
why give salary to his wife?
39 answers
-
Is it worth transferring real estate to children?
16 answers
-
What is cheating and is there life after it?0369
12 replies
#40
Guest
Why aren't you going anywhere?
So good in bed that you can't, or gives a lot of money.
#41
Guest
Why don't you go anywhere?
So good in bed that you can't, or gives a lot of money.
#42
male
Well, yes, but before the birth of the tugoseri, there was nothing like that, and if it was, then you turned a blind eye to it. After all, you need to give birth for yourself, and then drive the sucker out. Baba, you are the bottom. Cunning and vile bottom. It's good that when the same "for myself horn" climbed up to me, f-sing twirled, I first went here and on MD. And then I would have paid. If you want to say that I'm wrong - refuse alimony. Alimony e-anye.
#43
#44
Guest
It happened to me. He couldn’t stand it for more than a month, he deliberately provoked a quarrel, went to his mother, and went out with friends there.
