How to control masturbating
How to stop masturbating: 6 tips and tricks
Masturbation is a normal part of sexual expression. It can relieve stress and help a person determine what they enjoy sexually. If it becomes compulsive, however, it may become a problem. If this is the case, there are many ways a person can stop masturbating.
In most cases, masturbation is a normal sexual practice that does not cause any physical or emotional distress.
However, it can become a problem if it is interfering negatively with a person’s life.
In the sections below, we discuss why it may be beneficial to stop masturbating, how to stop, and how to recognize when it may be becoming a problem.
Share on PinterestStaying active can help a person lower tension and focus their energy.In some cases, masturbation can lead to negative emotions or interfere with certain aspects of a person’s life.
For example, if a person limits their interaction with others or misses work to masturbate, it may be time to consider how to stop masturbating.
Although uncommon, frequent masturbation can cause skin irritation and swelling of the penis.
When this is the case, it may be necessary to stop masturbating to ease the symptoms.
If masturbation is becoming a problem, there are strategies and techniques to help a person stop.
A combination of techniques may be helpful, including the following:
1. Avoid pornography
Exposure to pornography may trigger the desire to masturbate.
People who want to stop masturbating should avoid pornographic movies, images, and websites. If a person can place a barrier between themselves and pornography, it can help them break the habit.
It is now very easy to access pornography in just a few seconds. However, people can try to limit their access to pornography by using filters on electronic devices that block certain types of content, such as pornographic material.
Although a person can unblock such websites, taking the time to do so can give them time to regain control of their impulses and allow the urge to pass.
2. Stay active
It can be helpful for a person to find ways to occupy their time that does not trigger the desire to masturbate.
Finding outlets for energy release can replace the time spent masturbating. People can consider taking up a new hobby or learning a new skill, such as learning a musical instrument or trying a new sport.
Developing new goals can help a person refocus their energy and find excitement and fulfillment in other things.
It may also be helpful to determine when the urge to masturbate is highest and plan other activities for that time.
3. Seek professional help
When masturbation is negatively affecting a person’s life, it may be helpful to seek advice from a mental health professional who specializes in human sexuality.
It is possible that additional issues, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder, are the underlying problem. Talking with a therapist or psychologist is useful to work through negative feelings and learn behavior modification strategies to stop masturbating.
The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists offer resources to find help.
4. Spend more time with others
Some people may masturbate because they feel lonely or have nothing else to fill their time with.
Spending less time alone reduces the opportunities to masturbate. Spending time with others will not only keep a person occupied, but it might also redirect their focus.
There are several ways to decrease solitude. People can meet up with friends or family, take a class, or join a gym to stay socially engaged with others.
5. Exercise
Exercise is an effective way to both lower tension and positively focus energy.
Activities such as running, swimming, and weight lifting can strengthen the body and release endorphins that promote feelings of well-being.
Feeling happier and more relaxed may reduce the urge to masturbate as frequently.
6. Find a support group
Share on PinterestJoining a support group can help decrease feelings of guilt and shame associated with compulsive masturbation.
When masturbation is compulsive, it might be due to various reasons. For example, it may be due to:
- untreated mental health conditions
- relationship issues
- restrictive views on sexuality
- poor sexual communication or conflict resolution skills
- cultural differences in sexual expression
- cultural and religious conflicts
However, having support from a trusted group of people may be helpful for some people to quell the habit. Finding a support group can give them the space they need to express concerns and develop positive coping strategies.
When a person talks openly about the challenges they face, others can help them feel validated. This can decrease any feelings of guilt or shame associated with compulsive masturbation.
Masturbation does not typically cause side effects.
However, if masturbation is compulsive, constant, or vigorous, it may cause the following side effects:
- Edema: In males, gripping the penis too tightly during masturbation can cause mild swelling, or edema.
- Skin irritation: When masturbation is too vigorous, it might lead to chafing or skin irritation. Skin irritation is usually mild and goes away after a few days.
- Guilt: Although masturbation is not wrong or unhealthy, some people may experience negative feelings afterward, such as guilt or shame.
Myths that masturbation causes blindness or infertility are not true.
Masturbation becomes a problem if it is negatively affecting a person or impacting other areas of their life.
For example, if it starts to interfere with their ability to orgasm or have sexual relationships with a partner, it may be worth addressing the habit.
Compulsive behavior
In some instances, masturbation can be a compulsive sexual behavior.
A compulsive sexual behavior involves an intense and repetitive preoccupation with sexual urges, fantasies, and behaviors.
It is worth noting that this is not the same thing as having a high sex drive.
Compulsive behavior causes psychosocial issues or distress. This makes it hard for a person to actually enjoy the behavior.
When masturbation is a compulsion, it is a mental health issue. According to a case study report in the Journal of Psychiatry, compulsive masturbation is usually either an impulse control condition or a type of sexual dysfunction.
Feelings of guilt
For some people, masturbation also causes feelings of intense guilt.
One study in the journal Sexual Medicine, which involved 4,211 men attending a sexual medicine outpatient clinic, found that 8.4% of the men reported feeling a sense of guilt after masturbating.
All the participants completed a questionnaire and a structured interview regarding their frequency of masturbation and associated feelings.
Feelings of guilt may also lead to other issues. For example, higher levels of guilt was linked to increased alcohol use, which may cause other mental and physical health concerns.
In most cases, masturbation is a normal part of sexuality. Masturbation frequency varies greatly from person to person, and there is no “normal” frequency.
However, if masturbation begins to interfere with other parts of a person’s life or starts to cause distress, it might be helpful to stop or reduce the frequency.
There are several ways to stop masturbating, including avoiding pornography and focusing on other activities. However, if someone suspects that they have a problem with sexual compulsion, it is best to seek professional help.
How to Stop Masturbating: Techniques That Work
Medically reviewed by Janet Brito, Ph.D., LCSW, CST — By Kimberly Holland — Updated on October 10, 2019
Masturbation is a normal part of sexual health. It’s a fun activity that can be a safe way to explore sexuality and self-pleasure.
However, if masturbation prevents you from performing daily tasks or it interferes with your work or responsibilities, it may be time to try to create a better relationship with the activity.
What’s important to remember is that masturbation is not bad. It won’t cause side effects. In fact, it can be quite beneficial. Still, if it’s bothering you, quitting or cutting back is possible. Here’s how.
Masturbation is common. People who are in satisfying sexual relationships with a partner masturbate. People who aren’t in a relationship masturbate. People who don’t have a pleasurable sex life also masturbate. For most people, masturbation is a normal activity.
Occasionally, masturbation can become problematic. This happens when you:
- can’t control the urge to masturbate
- skip work, school, or social functions so you can masturbate
- plan your day around when you can masturbate
Learning to stop masturbating is a process. You must overcome urges and behaviors you’ve practiced for months, possibly years. This can take time. But it’s possible.
As with any other behavior that feels out of control, retraining yourself to not masturbate requires a series of steps and strategies. These can include the following approaches.
Find a therapist
When you’re ready to develop a healthier relationship with masturbating or to stop entirely, talk with your doctor. They can refer you to a counselor, psychologist, or psychiatrist who specializes in sexual health.
To find a local sex therapist, visit the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT).
These specialists are trained to help people with sexual health concerns like yours and can offer recommendations.
Be honest
Masturbation often carries a stigma. Some religious, cultural, and spiritual traditions associate masturbation with immorality or sin.
Masturbation is neither bad nor immoral. It’s normal and healthy. If you feel guilty or upset because you masturbate, tell your therapist or doctor. It’s very important you two get to the root of your feelings so you can overcome them.
Take your time
Therapy isn’t a one-stop shop. A single visit is a step toward help, but you should expect to see a therapist who specializes in sexual health for several weeks or months.
As you continue to meet and talk, you will begin to feel more comfortable. This can help you be more honest and forthcoming about your feelings and behaviors.
Stay busy
Keeping a full schedule will cut down on the opportunities you have for masturbation. Find activities that are self-soothing, engaging, or exciting.
This can include exercise, mindfulness, yoga, discovering a new hobby, making dates with friends for dinner, or exploring new museums or exhibits. When you keep busy, you reduce opportunities for masturbation.
Take care of your body
A healthy diet and exercise are good for your body in many ways. For people trying to stop masturbating, a new emphasis on caring for yourself may reduce urges or provide motivation to resist. It can also provide a new focus for your energy and efforts.
Develop strategies
With the help of your doctor or therapist, identify your trouble times. Maybe you masturbate at night before bed. Maybe you masturbate in the shower every morning.
If you can identify when you’re most likely to masturbate, you and your doctor can come up with activities and plans to overcome the urge and the learned behaviors.
Find a support group
Accountability is important for anyone trying to modify behavior that feels out of control. It can also help you develop new behaviors. Support groups are available for people with out-of-control sexual behavior.
Ask your doctor or therapist if there’s a support group in your area. Likewise, online support groups may be helpful for people who can’t meet with traditional in-person support groups.
Limit your alone time
Down time can be difficult for people trying to reshape behaviors. Try to move activities you’d normally conduct alone to a more public space.
For example, if you like to watch sports, go to a sports bar or pub instead of staying home. If you’re anxiously awaiting new episodes of a show, host a viewing party so friends come to your house.
Wear extra clothes at night
Underwear provides only a slight physical barrier between you and your genitals. But rubbing or touching yourself at night may mindlessly encourage you to masturbate. Wear an extra layer of clothing or two to reduce the sensation if you do rub yourself.
Stop watching pornography
The stimulation from pornography may be too strong to overcome. Take measures to prevent yourself from accessing pornography.
Throw out any movies, magazines, or other content. Move your computer to a public room in the house so you can’t be alone when using it. You can also install porn-blocking software. More important, identify what the function of your porn use is.
Be patient
Behavior that feels out of control doesn’t form overnight, and it doesn’t end overnight either. Be patient with the process. Commit to the end result and understand you may hit stumbling blocks along the way. Determination can see you through the inevitable mistakes and struggles.
Masturbation is a healthy, normal activity. For some people, however, it can begin to interfere with everyday life and activities. While there are no physical side effects to masturbating frequently, it may interfere with your work, school, and relationships.
If this is happening to you, learning to stop or cut back on masturbation may help you have a healthier relationship with this sexual activity.
Find the help you need to feel more in control of your sexual health. Don’t be discouraged if the process is difficult. Stay focused and reach out for help from a health care professional who is trained in human sexuality.
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12/28/2015
- Learn to control your breathing.
It is known that breathing is directly related to the human condition. If a person is excited, then breathing quickens, if he is calm, then, on the contrary, it slows down and becomes deeper. Before ejaculation, breathing and heart rate increase, therefore, to control ejaculation, it is recommended to learn how to breathe deeply and slowly. You can train in controlling your breathing at any time, so that during intercourse, when you feel the approach of ejaculation, stop the friction and concentrate on slow inhalations and exhalations. You can also practice slow breathing during the entire sexual intercourse, in order to "slow down" the excitement. - Learn to concentrate on sensations.
In order to determine as precisely as possible the moment when it is necessary to stop frictions and slow down breathing, it is necessary to feel the process of excitation very subtly. To do this, you can ask your trusted partner to use her hands to stimulate your penis. So that you can concentrate on your own feelings at this time. As soon as you feel that ejaculation is close, then ask her to stop.
The fact is that the male orgasm can be conditionally divided into 2 phases. The first is the phase of prostate contractions. It lasts about 5 seconds, when you just experience pleasant sensations. In the second phase, ejaculation occurs. Once ejaculation has begun, it is impossible to stop it.
Your task is to learn how to accurately determine the "point of no return", in order to stop the stimulation of the penis before the ejaculation has begun, and to remain in the contraction phase as long as possible. - Train your sexy muscles.
Every man is able to develop the ability to separate orgasm and ejaculation through muscle training. It is clear that by pumping the biceps or chest, this will not be achieved, so you need to train another muscle group. In the perineum there is a so-called pubococcygeal muscle (PC muscle). It is a muscular rope stretched between the pubic bone in front and the tailbone in the back. You know how it works when you want to stop urinating. It is enough just to tighten the muscle, as urination will stop. The fact is that orgasm is associated with the activity of the prostate, and the PC muscle covers the prostate, serving as a kind of valve for the seminal and urinary tracts.
To train the PC muscle, you must constantly stop urinating when you go to the toilet. Usually, this can easily be done more than 3 times at one time. - Stop ejaculation.
In order to stop ejaculation during intercourse, you need to do several things:
- Stopping frictions
It is necessary to stop frictions some time before ejaculation, at the contraction phase. At this point, you will already experience pleasant sensations, but are still able to control yourself. - Slowing the breath
It is necessary to start breathing even more slowly, or hold your breath after taking a deep breath. - Contraction of the PC muscle
Contract your PC muscle to contract the prostate. This will allow you to experience an orgasm without ejaculation. - Continuation of sexual intercourse
When you are sure that you have managed to stay on the phase of contractions and not go through the "irreversibility point", then, having slightly reduced the excitation, you can continue frictions. Such an orgasm can be experienced several times in one sexual intercourse. Thus, you can "finish" when you want.
In order to master this technique at a good level, you may need from a couple of weeks to a couple of months. But constant training according to the described schemes will allow you to move to a qualitatively new level of sexual relations with your partner.
(according to M. Grafsky)
90,000 Masturbation addiction. Fighting lustMasturbation, masturbation or masturbation is an extremely common way to relieve sexual and psychological stress. According to modern medical statistics, masturbation is regularly given about 90% of men and more than 60% of women. As noted by most professional psychologists and sexologists, such an activity can really help maintain libido, get away from stress and excessive overexertion. However, in some cases, masturbation becomes an obsession, an obsession, which leads to a violation of sexual function, and in some cases, social ties.
Masturbation as a norm of sexual behavior
In the process of puberty, the vast majority of adolescents resort to masturbation as a means of satisfying excessive sexual desire. Moreover, unconscious masturbation is quite common in infancy and early childhood (2-6 years). Moreover, such behavior in children as a whole is embedded in the concept of developmental norms.
The information on this page should not be used for self-treatment or self-diagnosis purposes. In case of exacerbation of the symptoms of the disease, it is necessary to seek diagnostic studies, diagnosis and the correct prescription of the treatment method from your doctor.
Adolescents and young people of both sexes, due to active hormonal changes and the inability to satisfy sexual desire due to lack of experience in building relationships, social and financial problems, regularly resort to self-satisfaction. The frequency of such acts depends on the sexual constitution of a particular person, as well as the state of his psyche. After marriage or the acquisition of a permanent sexual partner, usually the frequency of masturbation is sharply reduced and gradually disappears. Those who live a regular sexual life may occasionally experience individual episodes of onanism, which is also included in the system of ideas about a healthy sexual life.
The situation is getting out of hand
Regular masturbation in the absence of a regular sex life invariably leads to the development of a habit into a real addiction. The mechanism of its acquisition is quite simple - an independent discharge of sexual energy guarantees a surrogate pleasure in the process of onanism. Gradually, this practice leads to the idea that contacts with the opposite sex with the obligatory attributes of courtship (gifts, going to a restaurant, spending time together) are, in fact, unnecessarily energy-consuming, and therefore not needed. After all, self-satisfaction is much easier, easier, and most importantly - more accessible than sex. As a result, the addict narrows the circle of social contacts, isolates himself, comes to the need for constant reassessment of his behavior and introspection. Gradually, mental and psychosexual disorders are formed, which can be dealt with only with the help of a qualified sexologist.
Do not self-medicate and self-diagnose! Contact your doctor for an accurate diagnosis of the disease. Only your doctor can correctly diagnose and prescribe the right treatment.
Harm of onanism
So, we have decided. Excessive passion for masturbation forms a habit that, under certain circumstances, can develop into a pathological addiction. Such behavior in the advanced phase causes irreparable harm to the body. First of all, onanism provokes the development of:
- stress. Masturbation provokes the release of the hormone adrenaline into the bloodstream, which implies strong arousal. Adrenaline, carried with blood through the vital organs of our body, causes the acceleration of their work. In order to lower its level, physical activity is necessary. Sex provides significant physical stress, but masturbation does not. As a result, the heart and blood vessels suffer, which wear out prematurely;
- neurasthenia. Constant stressful conditions, overwork as companions of onanism, lead to chronic overexcitation. And this entails depression, irritability, dissatisfaction with oneself and the quality of life, the development of neurasthenia;
- depression of the central nervous system. As a rule, a person suffering from excessive masturbation, sleep is disturbed, memory deteriorates. The person becomes distracted, capricious, taciturn. The masturbator seeks solitude, avoids communication, which negatively affects his relationships in the family, work team;
- violation of protein metabolism. Masturbation enhances the breakdown of fats and at the same time slows down protein catabolism;
- prostatitis. The constant flow of blood to the prostate gland can lead to its enlargement and contribute to the development of the inflammatory process.
When to ask for help
Painfully attracted to masturbation develops over many years and in the early stages of the formation of this disease usually does not cause any concern. In case you are unable to control your behavior, it is time to visit a specialist. Otherwise, the development of autoeroticism (achieving sexual pleasure without a partner) will sooner or later end in mental problems and a violation of the mechanism of social adaptation.
How to help yourself
The attraction to onanism is an acquired disease that can be self-treated. All that is needed for this is the adoption of a strong-willed decision and the desire to help yourself. In order to cope with addiction, we suggest that you follow simple recommendations:
- engage in physical activity and sports. Regular visits to the gym, cycling, morning or evening jogging will help you relieve excessive sexual tension;
- Wear close-fitting thermal underwear or several layers of light clothing before going to bed. This practice will complicate access to the genitals, and, therefore, prevent attempts to masturbate in a dream;
- set yourself a system of rewards for refraining from acts of onanism;
- with a strong desire, take the emphasis lying down and push up from the floor 10-20 times;
- practice fasting. Learn to refrain from meat and fatty foods 1-2 times a week, do not eat spicy and peppery foods, completely give up alcohol.
Prophylaxis
To prevent the development of this complex disease, it is necessary to clearly understand the harm of this habit.