Be more patient

25 Tips for Increasing Patience in All Parts of Life

Patience is a virtue, but it can also be a medicine. People who know how to practice patience enjoy fewer negative emotions, feel less depressed, and are more satisfied with their lives. Further, patient people may also benefit from a range of health advantages, such as:

Better sleep
Fewer headaches
Better skin
Fewer ulcers
Less diarrhea
Fewer bouts of pneumonia

Why wouldn’t you want to take advantage of these benefits? After all, it seems that patience could be the secret to health and happiness.

Yet, too few of us actually practice patience, let alone know how to be patient. In this age of instant gratification, we’re so used to getting what we want when we want it. We can receive shipments same-day, get a meal in less than thirty minutes, and binge-watch our favorite TV show in a mere weekend.

Patience is critical for a well-functioning society, but we all need to get better at it. That’s why we’re bringing you this guide to the top 25 tips for improving your patience.

You’ll learn what being patient is and isn’t, how to use patience at work and in college, and suggestions for being more patient in your day-to-day life.

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Are you ready to start improving your patience and putting it into practice in your life? Then let’s get started!

Here are our best strategies and tips to help you develop patience in every aspect of life:

1. Understand What Patience Is and Isn’t

We all know that patience is a good thing. We’ve heard it since early childhood from our mothers, fathers, teachers, and coaches. But do you know what having patience actually means?

At its most basic level, patience is the ability to wait. But, more than that, it’s the ability to wait for something you really want or even need. And we also define patience as waiting for that thing without expressing irritation or frustration.

But let’s dive deeper into the concept of patience. Psychologist Sarah Schnitker has made a career out of studying patience. According to her research, there are actually three distinct types of patience:

Interpersonal patience
Patience in Life Hardships
Patience for Daily Hassles

Interpersonal patience refers to our ability to be patient with other people. This type of patience is especially important for relationships, in the workplace, and when interacting with young children.

Life hardship patience is a type of long-term patience we need when we deal with a significant setback in life. Another word for this type of patience is perseverance. Perseverance is critical in our personal lives, but it’s also useful for long-term goal setting at work or in school.

Finally, daily hassle patience is the ability to stay calm through life’s little irritations. Whether it’s keeping your cool in bad traffic or getting through a tedious task at work, practicing this type of patience can help improve nearly all aspects of your life.

2. Learn to Be a Good Listener

One of the best ways to learn how to be more patient is to improve your listening skills. This tip is an excellent way to increase your interpersonal patience skills.

Do you often find yourself waiting for someone to end what they’re saying so that you can speak your piece? Unfortunately, this quality isn’t uncommon. But it does mean you may not be as patient a listener as you could be.

Failing to show patience while listening can lead the other party to feel disconnected from you. If you’re more concerned with what you’re going to say than what the other person is saying, they may feel unheard or, worse, unimportant.

Instead, you could try to truly listen to the other person. No matter how mundane the subject, try to understand what they are saying.

When it’s time to respond, offer a response that shows you’ve listened to the other person and have something thoughtful to add or ask.

Related Read: How to Stop Procrastinating? 10+ Expert Tips to Kick the Habit for Good

3. Accept What You Can’t Change

Accepting things that are out of their control is another commonality among people who know how to have patience. This tip is helpful for all kinds of patience but especially for life hardship and daily hassle patience.

A lot of times, feeling impatient happens because we want something to change immediately. But practicing acceptance can help us feel at peace in negative situations while we wait for that change to happen.

A good tip for practicing acceptance is to adjust your expectations. Look at the facts available to you and recognize which of these factors you can control. Then, you can change what you have control over and let go of the things you don’t.

4. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is an important exercise in all aspects of our lives and for all types of patience. But what exactly is mindfulness? Being mindful means you live in the present moment without judgment for your thoughts or surroundings.

Try practicing mindfulness when you need to accept a situation that you have to be patient about. Here’s how:

You can close your eyes or keep them open
Without changing your breathing pattern, turn your attention to your breaths
Simply notice the way your breath flows in and out of you, not judging your movements
If a thought or external stimulus causes your attention to shift from your breath, note it without judgment
Return your attention to your breathing and repeat

Related Read: How to Calm Anxiety: 12+ Tips for Dealing With Anxiety & Stress Situations

5. Slow Down

We all live fast lives— we have deadlines for our payments and turnaround times for our work projects. Yet, when we take the time to slow down, we can be more mindful and patient. And, we might even be able to live longer, in fact!

In a study published in the AMA Journal back in 2003, researchers found that 18- to 30-year-olds who feel impatient and feel frustrated have a higher chance of higher blood pressure in their later years. The body seems to release stress hormones to prepare for a stressful situation, which can subsequently increase weight, blood pressure, and even blood sugar.

So, how can we slow down and live our daily lives in the current moment?

One way to do this is to fake it ’til you make it. Research shows that pretending to be patient can actually make you feel more patient. So, slow down your actions and speech, take a deep breath, and you might just feel more capable of waiting it out.

6. Identify What Triggers Your Impatience

We’ve talked a lot about patience so far but very little about its opposite— impatience. Sometimes, we can’t always stop impatience from rising up. So, we should instead try to prevent ourselves from getting into these aggravating situations in the first place.

How do you do that? First, you need to identify your impatience triggers.

Start by thinking about the times your impatience has reared its ugly head. Then, write down these instances and see if you can find any common themes.

For example, do you often get impatient when colleagues don’t get back to you in time? You might also notice that these instances of impatience occur most commonly when you have a big project due soon.

If this is the case, you can set yourself up for future success. Reach out to your colleagues earlier in your project timeline. That way, you won’t have to wait around on them to finalize your work before the deadline.

7. Get Comfortable Feeling Uncomfortable

Waiting around for something you really want or need doesn’t feel good. For many of us, waiting can be downright uncomfortable. And this discomfort often results in feeling impatient.

How do you fix this?

You can increase your tolerance for uncomfortable waiting periods by making yourself wait more often. That might sound counterintuitive, but, if you think about it, you can really become a more patient person.

Related Read: 15 Great Benefits of Learning a Second Language

8. Keep a Journal

Writing forces us to slow down our thoughts, and that’s (one reason) why journaling is useful. And as we’ve mentioned, feeling rushed is often a big trigger for impatience. You could use creative writing, bullet journaling, calendar journaling, or non-fiction journaling to help boost your patience.

Journaling is particularly helpful for tracking your progress over time. Learning patience can be a long journey, and you may get discouraged. Having a record of how far you’ve come can keep you focused and motivated. To help you get started with this patience-inducing practice, check out our best journaling tips and inspiring journaling prompts!

9.

Understand the Symptoms of Feeling Impatient

You know the feeling when impatience crops up: you sweat and clench your fists. Your mood changes, making you feel anxious, frustrated, or even angry. All of these are physical or emotional symptoms of impatience.

The good news is that understanding your emotions and impatience symptoms can help you mitigate them. Here’s how.

When you feel the physical manifestations of impatience, try to relax. For example, unclench your fists, roll your shoulders, and take a few deep breaths. Counting to 10 while practicing some deep breathing techniques is also an old trick to reduce stress that definitely helps here.

The emotional symptoms of feeling impatient can be even easier to combat. You may not be in control of your environment, but you are in control of the way you respond to it.

Try to see the silver lining in the uncomfortable situation. You may just find yourself feeling more able to deal with it.

10. Stop Multitasking

Contrary to what many self-help enthusiasts claim, multitasking is not, in fact, a good thing. At least not often. Proponents of multitasking say that this strategy can help you get more done, save precious time, and achieve your dreams.

The reality is that when we try to prioritize too many tasks, we spread ourselves too thin. There’s no possible way for us to give equal attention to each task. So, something ends up falling to the wayside.

Multitasking can also force us to move too quickly from one task to another. We might then expect others to move quickly with us. Forcing others around us to rush is a form of interpersonal impatience, and it can put a bad taste in others’ mouths about you.

Related Read: How to Take Initiative: Definition & Complete Guide for Career & Education

11. Utilize Time Management

A big trigger of impatience is feeling like we don’t have enough time in the day, especially when dealing with daily hassles. One way to avoid this trigger is to become a better time manager.

Time management means using your time wisely. There are thousands of resources on improving your time management skills. And you’ll see the benefits from not only increased patience but also a better work/life balance.

12. Take a Break

What do you do if time management doesn’t make you feel in any less of a rush? Sometimes, feeling like you’re always in a hurry and impatient means you need a break.

Hurry sickness is a non-life-threatening condition people can develop when they go non-stop. If you don’t take a break when you need one, hurry sickness could develop into burnout.

On the opposite side of things, taking a break might mean you need more physical activity. For example, if you’re a WFH employee or desk-bound student, getting some exercise in and your heart rate up may just be the break you need when you feel stressed and frustrated.

13. Practice Optimism

Do you experience a major shift in mood when you have to be patient? We’ve already mentioned mindfulness and journaling, which can help with the bodily sensations and physical symptoms of impatience. But what about the emotional symptoms?

When you feel frustration arise, try to practice optimism. It’s easy to get into a negative mindset, especially when you feel uncomfortable. Trying to find the positives in daily annoyances can help you feel more patient and less stressed.

Related Read: List of 100+ Best Icebreaker Questions & Conversation Starters

14. Seek Out Support

Humans are social creatures. We get a lot of gratification from leaning on people we can trust. This fact is no different when we’re struggling with patience.

Having a trusted friend, partner, family member, or colleague we can turn to when our impatience gets the best of us can help us feel better. But keep in mind that seeking out support doesn’t equal complaining.

In fact, studies have found that complaining about a negative event can actually make us feel worse.

Instead, we should try to use our support system to brainstorm how we can make things better. This strategy can help increase patience and resilience at work and in life.

15. Try Therapy

Not all of us are lucky enough to have trusted friends or colleagues who can listen and give us good advice. That’s when a therapist or career coach can come in handy.

Professionals like these can help you identify your triggers when you’re feeling impatient. They can give you customized tips to build your patience.

Plus, therapy can help you learn about the deep-seated traumas that may be exacerbating your impatience. Then, they can teach you coping mechanisms to help.

16. Work on Your Emotional IQ

Academic performance isn’t the only type of intelligence out there. Emotional IQ is a key type of intelligence that leaders, in particular, need to master to be effective.

The five features of emotional intelligence are:

Self-awareness
Self-regulation or self-control
Motivation
Empathy
Social skills

Related Read: 7 Best Online Safety Tools and Privacy Settings to Keep Yourself Protected

17.

Eat a Healthy Diet

Believe it or not, nutrition can have an impact on your ability to be patient. Patience is a type of impulse control. The brain regulates impulse control and nutrition, which, in turn, affects cognitive function.

In fact, a 2017 study on rats found that calorically-dense diets can increase impulsivity. Caloric density refers to foods that are high in sugar and unhealthy fats. When taken off the high-fat, high-sugar diet, this effect reversed— the rats were more capable of practicing self-control.

18. Take Up a Patience-Centric Sport

Practicing patience doesn’t have to be all hard work. You can make it fun with a sport that rewards you for perseverance. Playing sports that encourage waiting can be particularly helpful for building life hardship patience.

Fishing, golf, and baseball are fun sports that require patience. Hunting is another activity many people enjoy, and this sport definitely requires perseverance.

Not a fan of sports? Watching a baseball game or keeping your favorite golfer company can also improve your ability to wait calmly.

19. Read More

On average, only about 45% of people are willing to read for more than fifteen seconds. And the decline in reading is correlated with the rise in our culture’s collective impatience.

This is why reading more can help you practice and improve your patience. Try starting with a shorter article or novella before working your way up to longer books.

The only rule for this activity? Don’t cheat by flipping to the end of the book to satisfy your curiosity immediately! Make sure you are reading with full comprehension, and immerse yourself in the story or report rather than just wanting to get it over with so you can cross it off your reading list.

Related Read: How To Be Successful in College: 17 Great Tips to Achieve Success at Uni

20. Recognize the Communal Benefits of Patience

Do you need a little motivation to keep working on your patience? Then let’s discuss two of the greatest social benefits of being patient.

First of all, patience can make you a better friend and coworker. Patient people tend to have more empathy, be more selfless, and offer forgiveness more easily. We’re more accepting of the people around us, which makes life easier for both parties.

Secondly, patience makes you a better friend to yourself. Being patient helps you wait for results and payoffs, even when they don’t come immediately. This ability can go a long way in helping you achieve long-term goals and dreams.

21. Try Delaying Gratification

The human brain is hard-wired to seek out rewards. What’s more, we’re often conditioned from childhood to expect immediate results. If we cried, our parents would give us a piece of candy to make us stop; if we got $5 to spend, we spent it immediately.

However, instant gratification isn’t actually good for us. Delaying gratification teaches us to save for retirement and wait for the best house to come on the market.

But how can we get better at delayed gratification and, therefore, patience? Here are some tips:

Create wishlists instead of adding items to your cart when shopping online
Read for a designated amount of time before allowing yourself to watch TV each night
Design positive distractions for yourself (e. g., playing games, visiting a new place, etc.) while you’re waiting for your reward

22. Learn to Be Comfortable With Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive dissonance refers to people’s discomfort with holding two contradictory ideas at once. For example, you feel like traffic shouldn’t be so bad on a Monday afternoon, but traffic is, indeed, bad.

The main side effect of cognitive dissonance is increased stress levels. That’s why you feel so irritated when dealing with daily stressors. However, if you can get more comfortable with cognitive dissonance, you may feel both less stress and more capable of being patient.

Related Read: How to Improve Handwriting: 10 Great Tips to Up Your Handwriting Skills

23. Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

We’ve already talked about how mindfulness can improve patience. But one thing we haven’t discussed is how taking your life seriously at all times can hinder your ability to be mindful.

Learning to take yourself and life less seriously isn’t too difficult, either. Take moments to be playful and childlike throughout the day and try to find humor in difficult situations. These tips can help you live a freer life and have more patience along the way.

24. Practice Empathy

Did you know that interpersonal patience is a sign of empathy? Better yet, practicing empathy can improve your communication skills and interpersonal patience.

Psychologists define empathy as the ability to understand and feel what others are feeling. Empathy can help you understand that not everyone moves or thinks as fast as you do.

Empathy also gives you the insight that everyone sees from a different perspective and may, for instance, need more time to express their ideas and feelings.

25. Know When Patience Isn’t Helpful

We hope this article has taught you the virtues of patience. However, this wouldn’t be a complete guide without discussing the pitfalls of having too much patience.

When we’re too patient with others, we may end up sacrificing our own needs. Worse, people who consistently stretch their patience to the limits can become pushovers. This issue can be particularly impactful if you show high levels of interpersonal patience.

Additionally, delaying gratification for too long or too often also has negative effects. Polls show that people who put off rewards feel more dissatisfied than those who showcase moderate levels of delayed gratification. Further, delaying rewards for too long can lead to side effects like procrastination.

As with everything in life, moderation is key to maximizing the benefits and reducing the downsides of patience and delayed gratification.

Related Read: How to Improve Posture: 10 Exercises for Young Adults

Wrapping Up on Learning How to Be Patient

We hope this guide has given your some actionable tips on how to be patient. That way, you can take advantage of the health benefits of patience.

However, always remember that moderation is key. You should never sacrifice your own needs for the sake of being patient with others.

Also, don’t think reducing how often you lose patience is something that will happen overnight. Be patient as your learn patience!

Got any questions, feedback, or more tips on how to be more patient at home, work, school, or with the people you love? Let us know below in the comments, and thanks for reading!

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How to Be More Patient: 15 Tips

Jump to section

What causes a lack of patience?

How to have patience in life

How to be patient at work

The dangers of being too patient

The bottom line

We all know that patience is a virtue.

But how can we have more of it in our lives?

There are plenty of things that lead to impatience in our daily lives. Maybe a toxic colleague is bothering you, your boss passed you up on that promotion again, or your team isn’t performing the way you’d like. You might even be impatient with yourself.

If you’re not performing the way you’d like, it’s easy to fall into a spiral of self-doubt and frustration.

These things are enough to make you feel fed up. But while it’s easy to lash out at your colleagues or beat yourself up, these things will only hurt you in the long run.

Before these things become your Joker origin story, let’s find ways to stay calm. This will help you make smarter decisions, improve your mental well-being, and help you solve the problem rather than make it worse.

You’re among friends here. We know how frustrating life can be. So why don’t we find our zen together?

Here’s everything you need to know on how to be more patient.

What causes a lack of patience?

It’s important to understand the root cause of impatience.

The first thing you need to know is many people feel impatient. In a study involving nearly 3,000 Americans, 45% of Millenials said they feel less patient than they did five years ago. And they blame technology.

Instant gratification is at the core of most social media, providing users with approving “likes” and “shares.” Each response gives you a quick fix of dopamine, one of the brain chemicals responsible for pleasure. But here’s the problem.

The more we crave attention online, the less satisfying it becomes. Our brains get used to it until it’s no longer thrilling. And when we don’t receive our thrills, we become tired, irritable, and impatient.

Social media isn’t the only culprit. We live in an age where all human knowledge is available at our fingertips — no question remains unanswered. And we’re used to low-effort, high-reward scenarios.

How much dopamine will be released when we do something affects how likely we are to do it. We can also order just about anything to our door. And if we can’t, there’s a superstore nearby that probably has what we need.

Even dating apps like Tinder are designed to target your dopamine production to keep you on the apps.

It’s no wonder we’re impatient. Our culture and technology teach us not to be.

But being impatient increases your stress, which can cause health problems. Chronic stress triggers weight gain, high blood pressure, and potential cardiovascular issues. That doesn’t even begin to cover what a life without positive thinking will do to your mental health.

How to have patience in life

We have to fight this urge for instant gratification. Depending on the context, some methods will work better than others. A long line a the grocery store, traffic jams, rude family members — all of these daily hassles can send your heart rate through the roof.

But for now, here are some general tips on how to become more patient in life. Keep these in mind next time you feel yourself growing frustrated.

1. Reframe the issue

When you’re in an irritating situation, try to think about why it bothers you. Once you identify the reason, you can reframe the issue so it’s less cumbersome.

For example, if you find yourself waiting for a co-worker who is 15-minutes late, take it as an opportunity to read or catch up on emails. Maybe you can listen to a podcast in those few minutes to help relax. Turn that negative into a positive.

2. Practice mindfulness

Of course, identifying your feelings requires a certain degree of mindfulness. You can practice this technique by closing your eyes, taking a deep breath, and examining your thoughts and emotions. Naming them will prevent them from overpowering you.

3. Show gratitude

People who show gratitude cope better with delayed gratification. Next time you’re frustrated, think of something you’re grateful for. This will help calm you down so you can make better decisions.

4. Practice acceptance

Sometimes there’s nothing you can do to change a situation. In those cases, impatience solves nothing. Once you accept the conditions of the present moment, everything becomes more bearable.

5. Get comfortable being uncomfortable

Little acts of self-control can help you get used to discomfort. For example, trying to avoid scratching an itch. This will help you build the discipline to be a more patient person.

6. Slow down

Your deadlines probably aren’t as rigid as you think. If you’re feeling rushed, ask your superiors if you can take more time to complete a task. Otherwise, you risk producing shoddy work or cracking in the heat of the moment.

7. Try to have fun

Daily life is a lot less irritating when you imagine it as a sitcom. Many stressful situations are inherently funny, so don’t take things too seriously. Laughing will help you find how to be more patient and less angry.

8. Improve your listening skills

Active listening is an important tactic in how to be more patient with others. When you hear their concerns, you’ll be more compassionate. This kind of emotional intelligence will help you keep your cool.

9.

Remember, it’s not all about you

In some ways, impatience is a selfish mindset. Remember that you’re part of something bigger: a world full of people with their own worries, ambitions, and perspectives. When you put yourself in their shoes, you’ll have less to be frustrated about. Everyone is going through something you don’t know.

10. Sort your own baggage

Your impatience might be rooted in past experiences or traumas. Working through them will help you let go of negative emotions feeding your annoyance.

11. Examine your core beliefs and values

Everyone has their own set of core values and beliefs. Make sure you’re not projecting yours onto others. Because when you do, you’re asking them to conform to an ideal they don’t necessarily share. This expectation isn’t fair to you or them.

At BetterUp, we will help you find the tactics that best fit your needs. Our coaches listen to your current situation and put you on a path toward personal growth and improved patience.

How to be patient at work

Most of the above advice will help you at work, too. But from toxic bosses to poor teammates, jobs add a layer of stress that requires different tactics.

Our patience gets tried at work in a couple of ways: 1) People disappoint us. Other people and personalities work differently and sometimes that’s frustrating, annoying, or just confusing. 2) Leaders, the organization, or our own performance disappoints us.

We have career goals and expectations, and the opportunities and recognition available at work don’t always match.

Here are some extra tips on how to be patient at work.

12. Strive for realistic work goals

If your goals are too ambitious, it’s normal to fail. We know this is frustrating. But if you break your long-term goals into smaller milestones, you’re more likely to achieve them.

This sense of progress will help you improve your long-term patience. Also, adopt some grace and flexibility. With an uncertain economy and what feels like massive changes in the world month to month, your leaders might keep changing priorities, and your manager might not be able to give you the clear promotion plan you want.

While your needs and preferences matter, you’ll build better relationships if you show awareness of larger realities, too.

13. Be kinder to yourself

You might be putting too much pressure on yourself to perform. When you do this, you increase your stress levels and the likelihood of becoming impatient. Accept that mistakes happen, learn from them, and move on. Show yourself the compassion you would your best friend.

14. Improve your work-life balance

In most workplaces, you are expected to work productively with a range of other people, each with their own peculiarities and styles. This diversity is a gift — if you approach it right, you can learn more and achieve better outcomes than if you were working by yourself or with a handful of people just like you.

But, adopting this type of mindset and figuring out how best to work together takes energy, time, and patience.

All work and no play make you an impatient person. Make sure to find time to rest. If you burn yourself out, you’re more likely to be frustrated with your colleagues.

15. Focus on priority tasks

Use the Pareto principle (or the 80/20 rule) to organize your to-do list by impact. Prioritize the 20% of tasks that contribute to most of your productivity. Doing this will help you reduce stress and thus improve your patience.

The dangers of being too patient

While patience is a virtue, it’s important to know its limits. It’s not an ideal reaction for every scenario. You need to be assertive and stand up for yourself when other people cross the line. Otherwise, you let people off the hook for bad behavior.

Patience doesn’t mean a lack of accountability

Believe it or not, you can hold people accountable without losing patience. In fact, doing so can make you a more effective and charismatic leader. Here’s how to lead your team without aggression:

1. Give your team autonomy, but with clear expectations

2. Set up one-on-one meetings to make sure they’re delivering

3. Use the same rules for everyone and be consistent in how you apply them

4. Make your expectations non-negociable

5. Use a paper trail, such as email, to keep people accountable

6. Offer and be open to feedback

7. Create clear consequences for sub-par behavior or performance

8. Offer positive reinforcement for good work

The bottom line

Let’s face it. You probably don’t like being impatient. Irritation and frustration are not good feelings.

But you don’t have to feel that way. You can develop your patience to thrive in the face of adversity.

If you’re still reading at this point in the article, you took a step in the right direction. Patience is a key component of self-control and emotional regulation. And mastering your impulses will help you in your journey of personal growth.

These tips on how to be more patient aren’t the only ones out there. If you want more guidance, BetterUp is here. You can schedule regular one-on-one sessions with a professional coach who can help you maximize your potential.

How to become more patient. How can we learn patience and restraint, be patient and calm

The crazy rhythm of life, adverse factors, relatives who do not understand or do not want to understand each other - all this becomes the cause of quarrels, resentments, emotional breakdowns that gradually destroy the human nervous system, his family and life. Very often, after a violent reaction to what happened, many people think that it was necessary to remain silent, not to speak harsh words and take hasty actions. In order to exclude the occurrence of negative consequences from rash actions and be able to achieve what you want in life, you need to become patient. In this article, we'll talk about just that.

How to become more patient

Ask most married women what their family life is based on, and they all unanimously answer that patience. It is one of the qualities that helps to establish personal life and maintain relationships. By nature, women are endowed with patience, but they do not always know how to develop it and use it for their own purposes. But without it, it is impossible to live a full life, filled with accomplishments and achievements. It is not for nothing that the Japanese have a proverb “The one who endures for half an hour longer wins”, and a famous thinker said: “The world belongs to the patient”.

Having learned to endure temporary inconveniences, you will wait for a convenient moment that will allow you to change your life for the better. Lack of patience, on the contrary, will cause you to risk losing precious time and opportunities that do not appear immediately, but gradually as you achieve intermediate goals leading to the fulfillment of your cherished desires, trying to get everything here and now. Yes, and many families would have collapsed long ago if the fair sex did not understand that without their patience and ability to forgive, they would not be able to save their family.

To learn to be patient, first make a list of things that annoy you. It can be either certain people, or actions, places, events, or even a process, such as waiting or rushing. Having understood what drives you crazy, you will be able to easily eliminate such factors, thereby reducing the intensity of negative emotions. Even if you can’t permanently get rid of annoying factors, try to reduce their impact on you.

If communicating with a person makes you nervous, limit the time you have to spend with him, if necessary. Do not ask him unnecessary questions, do not try to prove anything, try to end the conversation as quickly as possible, briefly answering questions. In the event that you communicate with him only out of courtesy, think about how to do so in order to get rid of such a burdensome acquaintance forever. Here it is worth remembering that patience is not always necessary. Sometimes it leads to sad consequences that could have been avoided if you remember your self-esteem in time and that no one has the right to offend, insult and humiliate you. In the end, even if a person imposes communication, despite all your attempts to minimize it, let him culturally understand that you have no time and, in the end, politely say goodbye by leaving.

Stop worrying about what other people think of you. If you do not violate someone's rights and public order, do not interfere in other people's affairs when they are not asked to do so, you should not constantly worry about who will think of you. You can’t please everyone, take it for granted and take care of your own health.

When you feel the discomfort of being in a hurry, learn to manage your time properly so that you don't be late or wait too long. Find a compromise if you have to stand in line. To pass the time, listen to music or read an interesting book. Now you can get rid of many queues with the help of electronic services, you just need to study the information that is on the Internet on the issue of interest.

To reduce stress, remove things from your life that make it difficult. The need to be in time for everything, to visit several places at the same time, to tackle a variety of tasks causes an internal protest in a person. The ability to endure this will teach you to endure hardships steadfastly, not to give up when it's hard.

Often, outbursts of impatience become a sign of stress from excessive loads, so it is enough to stop running all the time and rush to live in order to calm down. Take time to think about your life, meet friends, solve one problem, and not several at the same time, and then you will show patience that you did not even suspect you had.

Top 7 ways to be patient

Develop a realistic view of the world . Not everything that happens in it depends on you or your desires. It can rain at any moment, regardless of whether you have taken an umbrella. Therefore, there is no need to be nervous about what is happening, but it is better to look for a way out of the situation if it is taken by surprise. You can’t prepare for all events, but you can foresee most of them. If you know that you are not distinguished by patience, you should not get a job where you cannot do without it. In other words, sometimes it is better to learn to live with the fact that you are too impatient than to test yourself once again.
Get used to the idea that the world around you does not require achievements from you , unthinkable successes or constant haste. Take a closer look at how everything in nature develops smoothly, without hurrying anywhere. Do not waste your time on things that do not bring benefits and do not give joy. Often, technical innovations create an acute shortage of time, which causes unnecessary irritation. Discard the ones you don't need.

If you are thrown off balance, mentally count to ten and take a deep breath before you say anything. There remains the desire to expose the offenders, say no, be glad that you have kept your health and have not stooped to their level. Do this so often until it becomes a habit.
Think about why you are impatient what it's related to. Is the current situation really affecting your life so much that it is worth worrying so much. Or maybe you are talking about accumulated stress. Try to get enough sleep by getting up in the morning at the same time.
Do things that do not take much time, but the result is immediately visible . To achieve big goals, make a plan that helps break them down into several small ones. Try every day to do something that brings you closer to the main goal. This will allow you to gradually move towards the desired result and at the same time feel a sense of satisfaction for the achieved intermediate goals. There is an interesting theory called “10,000 Steps” that explains why people who do what they love every day for several hours a day achieve world success.

In any situation that causes irritation and forces you to show miracles of patience, look for a way out, how to avoid its repetition. Children do not clean up after themselves, so agree with them that if they do not keep order in their room, then they will not get a delicious dessert or access to a computer. The husband does not clean up after himself, try to talk to him or change your attitude to what is happening. Try to find the positive in situations you can't change .
By following the recommendations, you can develop amazing patience that will help you stay healthy and rise to the pinnacle of success. Regularity and motivation are very important in this process. Realizing that it is necessary for you, it is difficult to give up. And constantly training your own psyche, you yourself will not notice how this quality will become an integral feature of character. Do not despair if it is not immediately possible to take it easier on the unfortunate events that are taking place. Remember that very soon you will forget what it means to be nervous about something that does not have any effect on future events, and what will affect you can always be corrected.

In life, you can achieve any goal, but you need to be ready to show miracles of patience and perseverance. It is patience that is responsible for the fact that a person will be able to stop at the right time, calm down, find the strength to continue the chosen path and at one fine moment see how all his dreams come true. If you don’t want to be irritable and nervous, to end up with a broken trough with fragments of unfulfilled desires, learn how to become patient.

In the long run, patience is exactly what is required to achieve your goals. Talent is not able to bring you success if it is not supported by work, but hard work, even without innate talent, can change your life. If you often lack patience, why not instill a new useful quality in yourself?

Bases of bases

First of all, accept as an axiom the idea that you should not give up if you don’t succeed at something the first time. You just have to do it over and over again until the result is achieved. Sometimes it takes decades.

It is important to complete any business you start, otherwise it makes no sense to take it on. Make lists and don't try to cover everything at once. Much more practical to proceed in order.

Be patient with people. We all tend to be self-centered, look at the situation from our own point of view and can only guess (and often mistakenly) about the motivations of another person. Try to smile and not get angry in response, a smile can often help resolve difficulties.

We often scatter our emotions on unimportant things. We get angry over trifles, forgetting to rejoice at what is important. Be patient and ignore annoying factors, trying to see the bigger picture.

It is impossible to be truly patient without a positive outlook on the world, otherwise you simply voluntarily take on the role of a victim, and moral depression prevents you from moving forward. Try to see the bright side even in negative moments.

When building a family hierarchy, it is necessary to clearly understand the difference between patience and meek obedience. In a number of countries in the Middle East, as well as in individual families scattered around the globe, patriarchy triumphs, and the rights of women are seriously infringed. Regular beatings and insults are not at all a situation in which you need to stock up on patience in order to save your marriage.

A more typical scheme for modern society is when spouses act as equal partners in marriage. And here it is necessary to understand that both sides must always make compromises. The discussion of the problem that has arisen is often better to postpone a little so that the conversation takes place in a calm atmosphere, and not at the peak of emotions.

In addition to relationships between spouses, patience in family life is also required for raising children. Being responsible 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for a little person who is sometimes extremely difficult to explain why it is necessary to follow certain rules is not an easy test at all. Parents get tired of children - this is normal and does not at all indicate a lack of love.

How to be patient: little tricks

When the nerves go off scale to the limit, a small pause can often help, a temporary escape from the situation. Abstract from what is happening and focus on your breathing, try to temporarily stop all the negative flow of thoughts. Count from 1 to 100, remember the alphabet, or do any other simple action to keep your head busy with something else.

If you're stuck in a traffic jam and late for an important meeting, try rearranging your thoughts and enjoy chatting with a friend on the phone or listening to a radio show. Perhaps for some it will sound blasphemous, but after all, bringing your nerves to the limit, you still won’t eliminate the traffic jam. So it's better to be late with dignity and a calm face. In a relaxed state, it is much easier to understand how to replay a failed plan with a new one.

Finally, it is extremely important to be patient with yourself. Don't beat yourself up needlessly if you've taken the wrong step. Self-flagellation is still not able to correct the situation. Learn from the mistakes you've made and give yourself another chance.

Most people don't know how to be patient. This often puts them in a burdensome position. They believe in the false belief that circumstances or other people can stop them from achieving what they want, or that all good things happen too late. This kind of thinking creates even more difficulties.

Every time we show impatience towards someone, it comes back to us as someone else's impatience or resentment. However, our impatience with others, or resentment of those who are impatient with us, is just a misunderstanding of the reasons for the behavior of others.

The ability to be patient with oneself is an even more important ability than being patient with others.

How to become patient?

How to be patient and calm when strong anxiety grows inside? Very simple.

It is worth taking an example from a farmer who has just planted a crop. He will not immediately dig up the ground to make sure that the seeds have germinated. He will fertilize the soil, irrigate it and patiently wait for the moment when the first shoots will make themselves felt.

At first, trying to be patient, you will still encounter the result of your past beliefs. You may also have a fear of an argument, an accident, or theft, which will lead to anxiety. However, do not be discouraged, calmly accept your imperfection.

You can help yourself a lot if you don't feel discouraged, scared, or overwhelmed. Be prepared in advance for the fact that a new habit will be difficult to inculcate, and will require frequent practice and patience.

You will see that the capacity for patience has begun to take root in the mind when you notice an improvement in your relationships with people. However, relationships with strangers will improve faster than with those closest to you. This is due to deep-rooted resentment in them. Your job is to learn to forgive.

Dissatisfaction with oneself, income or work may slip from time to time. But don't give up, give yourself time. A child does not grow up overnight. The darkest time of the day comes before dawn. As a rule, when you feel that your hands are already giving up, you are only a moment away from the start of a new day.

We become calm and patient when we begin to believe in ourselves, in our work and in our family. When we begin to realize the beauty of every day. When we trust intuition, because it is she who directs us to the right people and to the right places for our success. Faith in yourself does wonders. It transforms fear into confidence, hate into love, failure into success, suffering into happiness, and scarcity into abundance.

The rules are the same for all people. It does not matter gender, age, race, financial situation, education and chosen profession. By learning patience and faith, we become self-confident. And the more self-confident a person is, the more correct his actions and the higher the trust of other people in him.

Unfortunately, patience is not always rewarded. You will not get a million dollars by controlling yourself and holding back so as not to be rude to your boss. But on the other hand, by keeping yourself in control, you will protect yourself from being fired and will be able to test your strength. Be that as it may, the question is whether to stay at a job where the boss is unbearably stupid or quit as soon as possible.

Patience is not denial and inability to cope with problems. Patience is self-control and the will to win, it is the ability to wait and accept the world as it is. Patience is the ability to hope and believe. It has nothing to do with passivity and indifference, and each new stage in our life is marked by the expansion of the boundaries of patience. The idea that we just have to wait a little and everything will be fine is just an illusion. It just seems like you'll be more patient with yourself as your kids get older. In reality, miraculous changes do not occur. Having achieved something, you understand that true happiness is still ahead, and now you set a goal for yourself again and go towards it - persistently and patiently. So, patience consists of several abilities or skills.

The first and most important ability is the ability to divide a large goal into smaller ones and go towards them gradually, step by step. You'll find this advice in any book that has the word "Success" on the cover. But nowhere do you read that the main problem is to focus on small goals with the same degree of diligence that you apply to a big goal.

The second ability is the ability not to give up after the first attempt. Do not hang your nose if you have not waited for a call from your potential buyer, client, employer. Do not think that you are worse than anyone, even if you were not hired. Don't believe your ex-wife who says you are the most unbearable creature she has ever met. If you don't get something on the first try, then there's only one thing left to do: try again and again. You can only stop if you have lost interest in your goal ... but that is no reason to stop - find another goal!

The third ability is the ability to complete what has been started. After all, perfectionism is also part of patience. To see how often you bring things to perfection, it is useful to take a step back from time to time and look at everything from the outside. But try to be open-minded, as if you were judging someone's work. In this case, your "super ego" or inner "inspector" manifests itself. It is he who accepts or rejects the results of the work. Another tip: try to play the role of a person whose opinion you value and appreciate - from the position of this person, judge your work done.

The fourth ability is the ability to wait. Make yourself wait without undue excitement. Do not try to anticipate events and imagine how your dreams come true. The highest degree of patience is to be able to wait without talking about it. Everything comes in due time. In this "formula" there is something of Eastern wisdom, which says that we must accept our world with its incredible speed and unceasing pressure from outside.

7 ways to control anger:

1. Put the Patience Stone in your pocket. It can be anything: a ring or a button. The only selection criterion is that the object must be flat and pleasant to the touch. This is a secret item, one might say magical. Whenever you feel like you're losing your temper, pet your patience stone.

2. Count to 5 before speaking. Do not show your anger and anger, because then you will have to ask for forgiveness for him. Count very slowly and breathe deeply. Even if you count to 10 and the anger still persists, keep counting.

3. Rate your irritability on a 10-point scale. From 1 to 5 - you are almost fine. From 6 to 8 - you are angry, but you can control yourself. 9 or 10 - soon you will explode. What to do next? Nothing. As you evaluate your anger, you will calm down a bit.

4. Imagine that this is not happening to you, but to someone else, that you are watching the situation from the side. Focus on the details, especially how absurd and stupid the situation you are in is.

5. Try also meditation. When you wait a long time for something and it starts to annoy you, stand up straight with your feet shoulder-width apart.

6. Shift your body weight off your left foot without lifting it off the floor. Count to 5 and shift your body weight onto your right leg.

7. Dedicate yourself to household chores: do the cleaning, cook something, wash the dishes, ironing. This, as a rule, helps to calm down, since the results of the work done are immediately visible. This is also a kind of meditation. In addition, nothing lifts the spirit more than the sight of clean windows and shining dishes.

7 ways to become patient:

1. Drink less coffee. Black tea, coffee, cola, and chocolate contain caffeine, which can be an irritant.

2. Check your medication list. Increased irritability may be a side effect of medications and hormonal contraceptives. If lately you have been losing control of yourself more often than usual for no apparent reason, consult your endocrinologist.

3. Look for a way out of any situation. Try to eliminate reasons for irritation. If it annoys you that your husband leaves a tube of toothpaste open, then buy a tube that does not close with a separate cap.

4. Tell people no. We often get angry because we have to do work we don't feel like doing. But we agree to take this job, because we cannot refuse. If you're too busy to help your colleague with a report, or just want to watch your favorite movie with friends, simply refuse help.

5. Set the "last warning" rule. This is especially true for children when they test your patience. Set a rule that after the last warning, you will really get very angry. The next time you say, "I'm warning you for the last time," the child will have a choice - give up playing tricks and disobedience, or prepare for punishment.

nastyastar

61 followers

Patience is one of the most valuable ingredients for achieving success and goals. Only it helps to bring the work started to the end. It is patience that can push us forward, not despairing, stepping over failures, not giving up, to move on. How to develop this wonderful quality in yourself?

Remember how many goals you set for yourself, and how many of them you were able to achieve. As a rule, only a few can boast that they have realized all their plans. To a greater extent, nothing happened precisely because of the lack of patience. At the first difficulties, we give up, give up what we started and come up with a new goal for ourselves.

To prevent all this from happening, you need to develop patience in yourself.

Negative emotions. Let's start learning patience small. If you are angry, and screams are ready to break from your lips, stop, take a deep breath. It used to be always suggested to count to ten. But there is also more interesting advice. Come up with a phrase for yourself, and repeat it to yourself every time your patience threatens to burst. A phrase like: if you give in, you gain more.

Perseverance. Probably, there are units of people who do not have unfinished business. And patience means just to bring everything that was once started to the end. Write yourself a list of unfinished tasks, plan for one a day. And start working. In the future, when you become a patient person, you will no longer have unfinished business.

Understanding people. Becoming a patient person, you should definitely strive to understand people who until recently caused you irritation. And calmness in a stressful situation is an increase in your potential every day.

Don't look for easy ways. The development of patience is a very long way, it is the improvement of oneself, first of all, as a person. Going this way, you will be strengthened in your incredible desire to achieve the goal. If the goal is great and impossible to achieve it at once, do not despair. Break the goal into parts, and achieve them with all your might. And most importantly, time is the best way to tell the truth of your goals.

If your goal is to become a patient person, don't wait until Monday, or any other day, for a starting point. Start working on yourself right from this minute. You have a long and hard work on yourself, but the result you get will exceed all your expectations. After all, patience is the most important key to happiness and success.

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How to become a patient person

Nowadays, unfortunately, many people do not have good patience. Patience is the key to success and honor among people. After all, one who possesses such a quality in full, how can he be bad? The ability to endure lies at the heart of any advancement, so how to become more patient.

The inability to restrain oneself among others, at work, at school, or in any other public place, or even alone with a person - this can ultimately lead to a quarrel or other negative situations. But it’s worth a little work on yourself, developing in yourself such a quality as patience - and this will be a great support and help in difficult life situations.

The degree of patience is determined by our ability to forgive others, that is, the people around us, even the biggest shortcomings that they have. After all, we are all not perfect, so why not focus on the shortcomings that are in each of us, do not concentrate on the positive aspects of people, trying to appreciate them for their merits and achievements! We want to be treated well so we can start treating others the same way. How to become more patient - instead of changing a person - try to accept him and change your attitude towards him sometimes trying to forgive instead of criticizing once again.

"Able to endure, able to achieve whatever he wants" Benjamin Franklin

And he was right, because you can't even imagine how this quality of character can be valuable and important in each of us. Sometimes we all find ourselves in situations where it is very difficult not to break loose and restrain our emotions, but we need to find strength in ourselves and overcome this feeling. Become more patient - after all, is a man who has a huge supply of patience, peaceful and calm in life, , since he is not worried about the hardships that come his way, he looks at life objectively and tries to learn a lesson from every situation and come to the right conclusion.

Let's take a situation with the same anger, sometimes it comes to such an extent that a person expresses everything that he thinks about another, without thinking about the consequences and further course of communication, as a result of which insults and unpleasant conversations begin, but does this make it easier at least one of them? No, there is a feeling of resentment, anger, hatred or some other negative feelings. In the future, it will be more difficult to resume relations with the person with whom you had a fight, to those that were before, and even more so to improve them.

"Patience and respect in family negotiations will "grind" any conflicts" Oleg Roy

Everything remains in a person's memory, all those words and insults that were addressed to him, they are stored in the depths of his soul and can emerge in memory at the most inopportune moment. And the person who said something bad about his interlocutor has a heavy burden, with which he then walks and suffers. In this topic, I want to give below a parable of nails, which will help you become more patient.

Nails

“Once upon a time there was a very irascible and unrestrained young man. And then one day his father gave him a bag of nails and punished him every time he could not restrain his anger, to drive one nail into a fence post.

On the first day there were several dozen nails in the post. In another week, he learned to control his anger, and every day the number of nails driven into the pole began to decrease. The young man realized that it was easier to control his temper than to drive in nails.

Finally the day came when he never lost his composure. He told his father about this, and he said that this time, every day, when his son managed to restrain himself, he could pull one nail out of the post.

Time passed, and the day came when he could tell his father that not a single nail was left in the post. Then the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence:

- You did a good job, but do you see how many holes there are in the column? He will never be the same again. When you say something evil to a person, he leaves the same scar as these holes. And no matter how many times you apologize after that, the scar will remain.”

And in the soul of each of us there are these “scars” that will never disappear… Therefore, it is worth thinking over this very well and deciding for yourself, but do I want to do this? I can still change my attitude towards life and the people around me and start living differently, in a new way. I wish happiness to all those who surround me, do not criticize or be angry with others, help them, and begin to improve myself. And by changing ourselves, the people around us will also change.

“Patience should lead to better relationships. If you endure correctly, the relationship will improve, if it is wrong, they will worsen. If you feel that you have a negative attitude towards people, it is better to change something. This is not the right patience” Vyacheslav Ruzov

They say that life is like a boomerang, whatever you launch, it will return. And so it turns out, if you do something bad to someone - it will definitely return to you, if you do it well (sincerely, from the bottom of your heart, without malice and hatred in your heart) - it will return to you with even greater force. To become a patient person, you need to know the basic laws of life and, having studied them, it will become much easier to live in this world, as well as communicate with people around you.

"Never lose patience - this is the last key that opens all doors" Antoine de Saint-Exupery

After all, life is beautiful from different angles, you can just look at the same picture, but see it in different ways: someone constantly worries over trifles, seeing only the bad around him, and someone only the good. Now decide for yourself how you want to see this world and how it should look at you!

Beauty and HealthLove and relationships

Crazy rhythm of life, adverse factors, relatives who do not understand or do not want to understand each other - all this becomes the cause of quarrels, insults, emotional breakdowns that gradually destroy the human nervous system, his family and life . Very often, after a violent reaction to what happened, many people think that it was necessary to remain silent, not to speak harsh words and take hasty actions. In order to exclude the occurrence of negative consequences from rash actions and be able to achieve what you want in life, you need to become patient. In this article, we'll talk about just that.

How to become more patient

Ask most married women what their family life is all about, and they will all unanimously answer that it is patience. It is one of the qualities that helps to establish personal life and maintain relationships. By nature, women are endowed with patience, but they do not always know how to develop it and use it for their own purposes. But without it, it is impossible to live a full life, filled with accomplishments and achievements. It is not for nothing that the Japanese have a proverb “The one who endures for half an hour longer wins”, and a famous thinker said: “The world belongs to the patient”.

Top 7 ways to be patient

Develop a realistic view of the world . Not everything that happens in it depends on you or your desires. It can rain at any moment, regardless of whether you have taken an umbrella. Therefore, there is no need to be nervous about what is happening, but it is better to look for a way out of the situation if it is taken by surprise. You can’t prepare for all events, but you can foresee most of them. If you know that you are not distinguished by patience, you should not get a job where you cannot do without it. In other words, sometimes it is better to learn to live with the fact that you are too impatient than to test yourself once again. Get used to the idea that the world around you does not require achievements from you , unthinkable successes or constant haste. Take a closer look at how everything in nature develops smoothly, without hurrying anywhere. Do not waste your time on things that do not bring benefits and do not give joy. Often, technical innovations create an acute shortage of time, which causes unnecessary irritation. Discard the ones you don't need. If you are thrown off balance, then before you say something, mentally count to ten and take a deep breath. There remains the desire to expose the offenders, say no, be glad that you have kept your health and have not stooped to their level. Do this so often until it becomes a habit. Think about why you are impatient what it's related to. Is the current situation really affecting your life so much that it is worth worrying so much. Or maybe you are talking about accumulated stress. Try to get enough sleep by getting up in the morning at the same time. Do things that do not require much time, but the result is immediately visible . To achieve big goals, make a plan that helps break them down into several small ones. Try every day to do something that brings you closer to the main goal. This will allow you to gradually move towards the desired result and at the same time feel a sense of satisfaction for the achieved intermediate goals. There is an interesting theory called “10,000 Steps” that explains why people who do what they love every day for several hours a day achieve world success. In any situation that causes irritation and makes you show miracles of patience, look for a way out, how to avoid its repetition. Children do not clean up after themselves, so agree with them that if they do not keep order in their room, then they will not get a delicious dessert or access to a computer. The husband does not clean up after himself, try to talk to him or change your attitude to what is happening. Try to look for positive moments in situations that you cannot change . By following the recommendations, you can develop amazing patience that will help you stay healthy and rise to the top of success. Regularity and motivation are very important in this process. Realizing that it is necessary for you, it is difficult to give up. And constantly training your own psyche, you yourself will not notice how this quality will become an integral feature of character. Do not despair if it is not immediately possible to take it easier on the unfortunate events that are taking place. Remember that very soon you will forget what it means to be nervous about something that does not have any effect on future events, and what will affect you can always be corrected.

Tags: how to be patient, hand care, stress

How to learn to be patient. How can we learn patience and restraint, to be patient and calm

nastyastar

61 followers

Remember how many goals you set for yourself and how many of them you were able to achieve. As a rule, only a few can boast that they have realized all their plans. To a greater extent, nothing happened precisely because of the lack of patience. At the first difficulties, we give up, give up what we started and come up with a new goal for ourselves.

To prevent all this from happening, you need to develop patience in yourself.

Print

How to become a patient person

"Able to endure, able to achieve whatever he wants" Benjamin Franklin

"Patience and respect in family negotiations will "grind" any conflicts" Oleg Roy

Nails

Time passed, and the day came when he could tell his father that not a single nail was left in the post. Then the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence:

“Patience should lead to better relationships. If you endure correctly, the relationship will improve, if it is wrong, they will worsen. If you feel that you have a negative attitude towards people, it is better to change something. This is not the right patience” Vyacheslav Ruzov

"Never lose patience - this is the last key that opens all doors" Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Beauty and HealthLove and relationships

How to become more patient

Top 7 ways to be patient

Tags: how to be patient, hand care, stress

A potentially promising entrepreneur must have a lot of certain qualities inherent in a future businessman. Among these many qualities is patience. On the way to success, you have to overcome a lot of obstacles, and without patience , confidence and faith in one's own strength, it will be impossible to do this.

Nervous breakdowns, depressions and other negative psychological states are systematically manifested in people who are actively striving for success, but they must be eliminated. Patience of a Successful Entrepreneur should be "iron", because in the development of its activities, one has to take risks, endure difficult situations and solve problems.

Some entrepreneurs and psychologists point out that there is a general patience that is most important. Such patience is manifested in the pursuit of a specific goal, not postponing difficult moments for tomorrow.

Entrepreneur's patience

In other words, you must endure the influence of external factors and overcome your own laziness. For example, if you decide to shape your body and go to the gym, then you should act immediately, and not say "I'll go tomorrow."

In the life of a successful businessman, patience is also necessary under the influence of external factors. People can be a factor influencing the psychological state of a person. Also, the external factor may be the current situation that needs to be overcome.

psychologists have developed a great way to calm people who are negatively affected by external factors. All that is required is to imagine that you are looking at yourself from the outside. The moment you're ready " explode » try to look at the current situation from the outside, and only after that make a decision on further actions;
time can calm your condition, even if you are at the peak of irritation. In a difficult situation, under the influence of external factors, just look away and start counting to 10. Thus, you will be distracted from your own anger for a while and have time to “cool down”;
some people deliberately provoke you to aggression, but you should not be so stupid as to succumb to their actions. Make their attempts unsuccessful, during the conflict, just think about the fact that yesterday you wanted to buy yourself new shoes that you really like. You just need not to perceive a person who provokes you to aggression, he is simply not worthy of your anger;
the last way to endure a conflict situation , prevailing with a certain person, is to mock him. It is possible that in front of you there will be a person who looks great, but this does not mean that you do not have a reason to laugh. Come up with something about him and by doing so you will put yourself on a “step” higher, which will make it impossible for you to continue arguing.

Our psychological state is built not only on how often it is influenced by external factors, first of all we form it ourselves. Learn to endure and to perceive the negative correctly means to take a big step towards success.

Marina Nikitina

Patience is such a useful human ability, characterized by the ability to remain calm in unforeseen, changing circumstances. Also, this quality helps to normally endure what you do not agree with or “cheer up” in a negative state of affairs that does not depend on you at the moment. Wise, life-taught people come to patience when they have to accept external or internal factors as such. How to learn to endure? You need to be able to show emotional and spiritual maturity.

Benefits of patience or why you need it

In an unpredictable life, it does not hurt anyone to have patience, because so often it is not enough to experience unsettling things. And when there is nowhere to draw strength, internal, previously hidden reserves in the form of patience rise from somewhere deep and help to become stronger.

How to develop patience is a good question, but let's see what it's for first. So, the benefits of patience:

Steadfastness.
The ability to "jump over your head."
Extra strength.
vanity and anxiety.
With patience comes hope for a brighter future.
You and anger.

Patience is well developed by the practice of communicating with different people. Because of the imperfect world in which you and I live, it is extremely beneficial to develop patience with other people. You can stop teaching them, anyway, empty criticism only leads to anger and resentment, and not to constructive changes. Together with an adequate attitude towards others, you increase your tolerance for yourself and do not “give up” at the slightest difficulty.

How to develop patience and endurance

In order to learn to wait and endure, you need to learn a few simple rules:

If there comes a moment when endurance is about to let you down, do not rush to “explode”. Count to ten (up to twenty in particularly difficult cases), and then react. Discontent and anger will remain, but will no longer be so “seething”.

The energy of denial or rejection overwhelms you, but is it unacceptable to “pour out” these emotions? Then get some exercise. This will allow you to channel some of the "blast wave" of your impatience in a more useful direction.
Make it a habit to do the exercise “ ” at every opportunity.

The essence of the exercise: imagine what happened before the event that bothers you, think about what led to it. Answer the question: how many billions of people lived before you and will live on earth after you? Realize that they must have experienced difficulties too. Although they differed from your specific problems of incontinence, the inner meaning is the same: we all function, perform actions that become momentarily important for us, but mean nothing after a short period of time and a look at the problem “from the height of past years”.

Pay attention to how you are weighed down by unfinished business, abandoned halfway through. Try not to let this happen.

Try breathing exercises. There are several methods for performing such gymnastics: with a special apparatus, breathing with the stomach without an apparatus, with a stopwatch or music.

How to develop patience through such training? Very simple: gradually and calmly follow all the recommendations indicated in the description of the breathing technique. Within a week or two you will feel the change. In addition, improve your health, because breathing techniques trigger healing mechanisms by increasing carbon dioxide in the body and stop the so-called cell overoxidation (oxygen poisoning).

Every day, if possible, control your intermediate results of work on yourself. If you are lucky, praise yourself, because you deserve it.
Do what you love at least a couple of hours a week if you are too busy. A satisfied person will not lose.
Do not forget to monitor your physical health and support it in every possible way: a healthy and happy person will not lose his temper over trifles.

Patience well develops a militant attitude towards work on oneself. Take intolerance as a defeat, then every time when the prerequisites for losing patience arise, say to yourself: “No, I will not give up!”, “You won’t take me so easily!”, “I will overcome everything”, “I can do anything”. Feel like a warrior overcoming difficulties and tempering your spirit and endurance in battle with yourself. You will be surprised at the pleasant sensations that arise at the moment when you win the first small victory over intemperance. You will immediately want to win again and again.

It's hard to just start, to believe in yourself, that you can handle it. Never say "I can't". When you make that kind of statement, you really can't. Let the thought fly ahead of the deed: yes, you really cannot learn to endure right away, but you need to make the installation: “I can not be nervous!”, “I can do more!”, “I can handle anger” and so on. Then the rest of the body, together with consciousness and subconsciousness, will not be able to resist such pressure.

The subconscious guides us, but only while we are hiding from the realization of the real state of affairs, from the truth, lying to ourselves. When you look reality in the eye and know for sure (but without judgment) your shortcomings or what you still need to work on, the consent of all internal and external processes will come, and impatience will go away. After all, impatience is associated with misunderstanding and rejection, which you will no longer have.

How to Develop Patience: Alternatives

Additional Tips and Ideas for Patience Training:

After all, for classes you need a huge amount of calmness and patience, which is so lacking in Western people.
Go to a long opera in three or four acts if you are not an admirer of this art form.
and a way to feel like a changing part of a huge, seemingly fussy world. Try doing it yourself or enroll in a meditation course.

Do you remember how the postman Pechkin said: “Why was I angry? Because I didn’t have a bike”? So you definitely need to find this “bike” of yours, that is, a business, hobby, passion that you like to do. It’s not scary if you need to spend time and effort on this activity, which you don’t have left after a hard day’s work. Remember that the best rest is a change of activity. There will be much more benefit from the effort spent on playing sports or modeling airplanes, for example, than from “resting” on the couch, which does not bring real relief from the yoke of problems.

Grief at failures pushes back self-development, therefore, instead of uselessly wasting internal energy on self-flagellation, analyze what happened. Until the cause of the failure is found and eliminated, do not expect progress. The error that caused the failure will occur again. Show yourself respect and coolly analyze your behavior according to this scheme: “cause and effect”. The link where the mistake was made, think over and remember. Now you will prevent the same mistake in the future, and this is another small step towards the goal.

To the question “How to develop patience and endurance?” there is no one answer for all, because the problems are diverse, which means that the solutions are also different. If something constantly throws you off balance, then the first step is to figure out what exactly and why. After all, if you restrain yourself by an effort of will, this is not patience, but violence against yourself. It is much easier and more correct to eliminate the cause than to constantly deal with its manifestations.

March 29, 2014, 03:26 PM

When people lose loved ones, or find themselves in a difficult family situation, when everything in life goes the way you want, the most difficult thing at this moment is not to give up, but to continue to fight. What prevents you from investing all your efforts in solving the problem? Most likely, this is what you have repeatedly tried to look for a way out of the situation, but each time your ideas have failed, you have not been able to achieve the desired. After that, complete devastation comes, you don’t want to wait at all, because you stop seeing the point in waiting. It seems that time is running out, but the problem remains, and in your head it grows and splashes out with more force. A person can become more aggressive, or vice versa, withdraw into himself. How to avoid this, and learn to wait, endure and steadfastly overcome all the hardships of life?

Believe in yourself. Whatever happens around you, first of all, you must believe in yourself and your strength. Do not give up! People always want to get results right away, to see and feel success in the first minutes, but there is no quick success.
Find a benefit. While other people around you will lose control of themselves, you will be able to behave calmly and with restraint, and soberly assess the situation. Therefore, your position in life will be much stronger.
Protect yourself. Restraint and patience will allow you to withstand the offender or survive the tragedy with less psychological trauma. The more calmly you react to what is happening, the easier it will be for you. Emotional control is already a small victory, and it will lead you to solve all life problems that will surely come your way.
Be patient with others. You will not always like how other people behave, in relation to work, to life, to you. But in this situation, you just need to learn how to react calmly. If you internally worry and think that a person is soulless, terrible and did a bad thing, then just conclude for yourself that you will never do this.
Be patient with yourself. This is much more difficult than tolerating others. For many people, when something does not work out, there is a feeling of self-loathing. They try to find flaws and dig deeper and deeper, chasing their emotions, pulling out all the suffering. But that behavior doesn't make it any easier. You must understand that it is impossible to always do the right thing. Any mistake can be corrected, but if you made it, you don't have to hate yourself for it. Don't drag out your frustration for weeks or months. Nobody says you have to be insensitive. You can afford to be upset today, but tomorrow you should already be looking for a way out of this situation with a fighting spirit.

Always think of a positive outcome. Set yourself up for the fact that all troubles will pass, and better times will come. The main thing is not to run ahead of the locomotive, try to be a restrained, patient and balanced person. Then you will definitely succeed!

The ability to be patient with oneself is an even more important ability than being patient with others.

How to become patient?

How to be patient and calm when strong anxiety grows inside? Very simple.

We become calm and patient when we begin to believe in ourselves, in our work and in our family.

Learn more