5 types of emotional intelligence

The 5 elements of emotional intelligence

The 5 elements of emotional intelligence | ICAEW

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Student Insights

Author: ICAEW Insights

Published: 28 Apr 2021

Skills for Success: the 5 elements of emotional intelligence

Here is our guide to the key personal and interpersonal skills.

Psychologist Daniel Goleman identified the key personal and interpersonal skills involved in emotional intelligence – and why EQ is just as important as IQ when it comes to success.

1. Self-awareness

Self-awareness is about recognising and understanding your emotions – what you’re feeling and why – as well as appreciating how they affect those around you. It’s the basis of good intuition and decision-making, helping you to instinctively make the right choices for you in all aspects of life. Self-awareness is also about knowing your strengths and weaknesses, and what is important to you – your values or moral compass.

2. Self-regulation

Once you’ve mastered emotional awareness, the next step is managing those emotions – particularly the negative ones – effectively. Always treat others with respect and try to stay in control. If you have a tendency to emotional outbursts, practise being calm: step back and take a deep breath. It’s also important to stay true to your values, and hold yourself personally accountable for any mistakes.

3. Motivation

The third ‘personal’ element, motivation is about your drive to improve and achieve: setting high standards for yourself and working consistently towards your goals. Take the initiative: be ready to act on opportunities as they come along, and practise being assertive. Motivation is also about optimism and resilience, and finding the positive in a situation, even – or especially – those that didn’t go well.

4. Empathy

A key interpersonal skill, empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and see a situation from their perspective. As well as having an awareness of others’ feelings, it’s important to acknowledge and respond to them – even if you don’t agree with them. Respecting diversity and inclusion is a vital aspect of empathy, as is communication: pay close attention to what you and others say, whether verbally or through body language.

5. Social skills

Often described as a ‘people person’, those who are socially skilled are adept at dealing with others. They are trustworthy team players and confident communicators: as good at listening to other people as they are at speaking themselves. They also make great leaders, inspiring and motivating colleagues, managing change and resolving conflict effectively, and giving praise where it’s due.

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The 5 Components - Emotional Intelligence

The 5 Components

Emotion is a wide range of observable behaviors, expressed feelings, and changes in the state of mind and body. Feelings, emotions, our likes, and dislikes, give our individual lives meaning and cause us to be happy or unhappy, satisfied or dissatisfied. Intelligence is the ability to acquire and apply knowledge and skills. Emotional Intelligence is the ability to deal with other people successfully. By understanding one's own feelings they can understand and evaluate others .According to Daniel Goleman, there are five main elements of emotional intelligence. 

  • Self-Awareness
  • Self-Regulation
  • Motivation
  • Empathy
  • Social Skills

This is the ability to recognize and understand ones moods, motivations, and abilities. Also understanding the effects they have on others.  Goleman says to achieve a state of complete self-awareness, an individual must be able to monitor their emotional state and identify their emotions. Traits that prove an individual as emotionally mature include: confidence, the ability to laugh at ones self and their mistakes, and the awareness of how you are perceived by others.
Example: By reading the reaction of someone else, you know how you are perceived by them.

This is the ability to control ones impulses, the ability to think before you speak/react, and the ability to express yourself appropriately. Goleman defines emotional maturity in this component as being able to take responsibility for your actions, being able to adapt to change, and the ability to repond appropriately to other peoples irrational emotions or behavior. 
Example: If someone is screaming at you, you know that they are not always angry at you. You have the ability to understand they may be angry at a particular situation and feel they need to take it out on someone. You do not take this personally or react angry back.

This is having an interest in learning and self-improvement. It is having the strength to keep going when there are obstacles in life. It is setting goals and following through with them. Goleman would define an emotional mature individual in this category to have traits such as having initiative and the commitment to complete a task, and having perseverance in the face of adversity.
Example: One who chooses internal motivation driven goals instead of exterior motivation driven goals. Internal motivation driven goals are things such as earning a college degree or becoming a healthier person; things that show self improvement. Exterior motivation driven goals are things that flaunt wealth or status. This is setting goals such as having the next newest and nicest car. 
Example: If a student fails a class, they see this as an opportunity to learn and retake the class without self doubt. They do not let failure get in the way of their goal.

This is the ability to understand other peoples emotions and reactions. Empathy can only be achieved if self-awareness is achieved. Goleman believes that one must be able to understand themselves before they can understand others. Emotional maturity in this category includes people having traits such as perception of others, being interested in other peoples worries and concerns, the ability to anticipate someones emotional response to a problem or situation, and the understanding of societies norms and why people act the way they do. 
Example: Being able to understand cope with someone elses hardships or sadness. When you fully understand yourself and why you feel the things you feel, you can understand other peoples even if they are different than you.

Social Skills
This is the ability to pick up on jokes, sarcasm, customer service, maintaining friendships and relationships, and finding common ground with others. Goleman states that emotional maturity in this component defines someone who has good communication skills, good time management, the ability to be a leader or manage a group of people, and the ability to resolve difficult situations or conflicts using negotiation or persuasion.  
Example: Someone in a "boss" position usually has a good grasp on handling all different types of personalities. If two of their employees are having a conflict, they can find common ground and resolve the issue in a civilized and fair manner.

Why emotional intelligence is important and what levels it consists of

They say that your IQ is what will help you get a job, at the same time EQ (emotional intelligence) will help you build a career and achieve important goals for you if you work in your business or for hire.

How does it work? And why the highest IQ, as practice shows, most often among unemployed programmers? It's simple: emotional intelligence is what allows you to build long-term and highly effective relationships in business, work and even family, by recognizing emotions and regulating emotions in management, sales, hiring, service, team building and, of course, in raising children. nine0003

At the same time, it is important to understand that in reality we are all masters in recognizing our own and others' emotions. However, this skill is dormant for most of us, because we greatly underestimate the role of emotions (both our own and those of others) in achieving our own and collective goals.

Level One: Knowing Yourself

It is with mastering the first level - the level of recognizing your own emotions - that your EQ begins. The more you are able to recognize your emotions, as well as what effect in terms of building / destroying business, career and family, or modeling personal goals, your emotions create, the more accurately you understand this, the more effective you can become. nine0003

Second level: managing your emotions

It is obvious that it is not enough to understand your emotions, it is important to be able to transform them in the interests of business. It is very important to be able to transform emotions from destructive and neutral to constructive, that is, contributing to the achievement of the goals you need - including through interaction with other people. But you need to start with yourself. For example, this means: if you are forced to do something out of a sense of duty with negative emotions, then the probability of obtaining the desired result with a minimum expenditure of nerves and resources is almost impossible. nine0003

This can be seen very easily in a situation where a nervous person tries to do some work, but his computer freezes or any office equipment stops working normally. This is evidence that, for example, emotional irritation forms an unfavorable energy background that prevents obtaining the desired result in the shortest possible time. That is why the emotional mood is so important when performing complex, precise and highly responsible tasks. There is a proverb: "The morning is wiser than the evening." But as you understand, it is not relevant for everyone, but only for those who cannot creatively adjust their emotions in the evening. I know people who tend to peak concentration in the late hours. nine0003

During our life we ​​live in four main sectors of emotional states, each of which has its own levels of intensity.

The author singles out the mood scale and the activity scale as a tool for differentiating different types of emotions that a person has in relation to himself, and emotions that appear when interacting mainly with the outside world. This is shown more clearly in the figures.

Emotions in relation to oneself

Emotions in relation to the outside world

Each emotion has its own function and is based on a system of values, feelings and perceptions, laid down since childhood. External sensations and manifestations of a person in interaction with himself and the outside world form our level of emotional intelligence. So, if in childhood a child or teenager often achieves what he wants through anger, then this particular emotion will be dominant in defending his position in adulthood.

Third level: recognizing the emotions of others

A person can use various emotions in a differentiated way in interactions with family members and, for example, with clients on whom his or her well-being will depend. For example, participation and empathy may be dominant in interactions with customers who are more likely to order a product or service.

Fourth level: control of other people's emotions

So, a person who sees skepticism and apathy on the face of a client may experience an emotion of indignation, which in turn can cause reciprocal anger in the client. And vice versa, the apathy of the client (subordinate) can be tried to be transformed into interest by certain words and actions, supported by a correctly expressed emotion. nine0003

For example, you might say to a client, “Indeed, it may seem that there is nothing interesting in our offer. But if you look from the other side ... ". And then you should appeal to the theses previously expressed by your opponent, bringing your emotional positions closer to his positions through rational actions and acceptance of his emotions. So you are more likely to achieve an important goal for you.

Fifth level: taking into account the psychological characteristics of the interlocutors

At this EQ level, you not only understand your emotions and control the emotions of other people, but also do it differently, taking into account their psychological characteristics. After all, someone’s anger as a reaction to anger will cause respect, and your anger will plunge someone into fear and provoke a desire to run away - in the literal or mental sense of the word, evading responsibility for actions that are important to you, or even preventing them. nine0003

If you respond with sadness or apathy to a proposal or assignment that is not warmly received, this may cause your counterpart to become resentful or disappointed. After all, his expectations will also not coincide with your emotional reaction.

The main principle of using emotional intelligence

It is very important to remember that emotions, like physical strength, can both help achieve goals and destroy the basis for achieving them. The main tenet of emotional intelligence is no longer just necessary and sufficient. The main principle of EQ: emotions should be manifested at the right time, in the right place, in the right way. Just like using physical force, we can either build something or break something, if we do not measure the pressure and the result we need. nine0003

In addition, it is important to know that we get both what we sincerely and positively want and what we fear with all our might. Emotions, like a magnet, attract actions, events and results on which we concentrate them. At the same time, people who are emotionally positively tuned achieve great results without possessing physical strength. Conversely, physically strong people, whose emotional consciousness is focused on the negative, often plunge into the abyss of loss.

Thus, human emotions are a unique driving force that can move entire nations. What matters is the direction in which people will be mobilized, whose emotions will be controlled by their leaders. At the same time, everyone decides for himself whether to be a creator or a destroyer! To be a victim of your emotions or an author and tamer of your energy and as a result - the master of your life and career! nine0003

Read also:

The Five Components of Emotional Intelligence | Rusbase

Emotional intelligence is often misunderstood and equated with advanced social skills. It's like putting an equal sign between a car and a steering wheel. The degree of development of social skills determines the relationship of a person with the outside world, with other people. Although EI significantly affects this part of life, it is much more connected with the inner world.

It is our internal state that determines how we interact with and react to the external environment. Thus, EI is what we are filled with and how we manifest ourselves outside.

The EI model includes five components

  1. Self-awareness and self-control is a complete understanding of oneself and the ability, based on this understanding, to effectively manage one's emotions.
  2. Empathy - the ability to understand the feelings and emotions of other people, to put yourself in their place. nine0072
  3. Sociality - the ability to sincerely build relationships and connections, care, show interest and resolve conflicts.
  4. Personal influence - the ability to inspire and stimulate both others and yourself.
  5. Goals and Vision - the ability to live your own mind, achieve your goals and stand up for your values.

As can be seen in the model shown in the figure, three components of EI (self-awareness and self-control, empathy, goals and vision) relate to the inner world of a person, and the other two (sociality and personal influence) determine his relationship with the outside world. However, it is important to understand that all these components are interconnected and depend on each other. nine0003

Self-awareness and self-control “open the door” to EI, without these qualities it is very difficult, if not impossible, to improve relations with the outside world. For example, if I know nothing about my actions, thoughts and words, I have no basis for understanding myself. Having begun to understand myself a little, I ask myself: how do I, in my current state, influence others?

Having decided that this influence is negative and contrary to the goals that I set for myself, I will try to change my actions, thoughts or words - to apply the skill of self-control. It allows you to recognize and determine the desired degree and way of expressing emotions. How can the latter improve my relationships with people and help me achieve my goals in life? How can they interfere? nine0003

So, self-awareness and self-control are closely intertwined with each other. The next component is empathy, which is also labeled as an intrinsic function in our model. Before learning to manifest it in relationships with other people, that is, to direct it outward, it is necessary to realize it within oneself. A person without empathy is not able to understand how his actions or words affect others. It can be explained to him that his behavior or statements hurt or, conversely, inspire, but only empathy will allow him to experience the feelings of other people. nine0003

Photo: Unsplash

Next in our model is sociality. Few people are able to live or work in complete isolation. It is sociality that allows us to build trusting and safe close relationships with other people; allows you to learn more about someone than his name, position and TIN. Let me give you an analogy: for many of us, a business card holder serves as a display of social connections, but an indicator of the development of your social skills in this case is not the number of contacts in it, but how many people will be truly happy with our call or message. nine0003

In addition to personal relationships, sociality helps build business relationships to achieve common goals. To what extent are you able to cooperate with other people, accept someone else's and contribute to the common cause?

Do not forget that in the process of any partnership, conflicts, clashes of interests and conflicting ideas are almost inevitable. How to overcome them? Sociality implies the ability to painlessly resolve conflict situations; otherwise, it is impossible to maintain intimacy and trust in relationships. nine0003

Another component of the EI model is personal influence. Personal influence is what distinguishes leaders, allows you to influence the goals or aspirations of other people. However, in order to acquire the ability to influence, it is necessary to build strong ties, learn how to cooperate and resolve conflicts. You don't have to be in a leadership position to be a leader. Even if we use them only for raising children, this component of EI is necessary for a fulfilling life, and should not be ignored. However, he plays the most important role where it is necessary to influence himself. nine0003

Photo: Unsplash

All major changes are made first in your own soul. Only by learning to change and direct oneself does a person gain the ability to truly influence other people.

The final component of the model is goals and vision. This facet of EI is the thinnest and deepest. It is she who creates the basis for improving EI and, consequently, the quality of life. It serves both as a motive for developing EI and as a compass that keeps you on track. It is much easier for a person who knows where he is going and what he is striving for to determine which type of emotional reactions will help him and which will hinder him.

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