Meditation and mindfulness book

The Best Mindfulness Books of 2020

Throughout this turbulent year, one of our enduring sources of hope and inspiration has been curling up with a good book. Fortunately, when the going got tough, these new titles were there to keep us going. From the books that expanded our knowledge about the brain and the body, to those that helped us ride the waves of emotion and reconnect with compassion, here are the Mindful editors’ favorites.

1. Permission to Feel

Unlocking the Power of Emotions to Help Our Kids, Ourselves, and Our Society Thrive

Marc Brackett • Celadon Books

Brackett—founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence—came to this work with a mission born from his own experience of bullying and sexual assault, which he discusses poignantly in Permission to Feel. Before we learn his story, however, Brackett paints a vivid picture of why emotions matter so much for public health and education. Incidents of bullying and harassment in US K-12 schools doubled each year between 2015 and 2017; 46% of teachers report high daily stress; from 2016-2017, one in three students across 196 US colleges reported diagnosed mental health conditions; a quarter of US children between 13 and 18 suffer from anxiety disorders; and by 2030, mental health problems could cost the global economy up to $16 trillion. When our children learn unhealthy responses to emotion, tangible results ripple through families, schools, communities, and society. That’s the diagnosis.

Brackett’s prescription—as researched, taught, and advocated for at the Yale center—begins with a very simple question: How are you feeling? If the response is avoidance or lying, if no one is interested in our genuine answer, we’re almost certain to suffer, and that suffering will spread. Instead, Brackett recommends the RULER method: Recognizing emotions in oneself and others; Understanding the causes and consequences; Labeling emotions precisely; Expressing emotions, taking context and culture into consideration; and Regulating effectively. The book expands on this method and how it’s used for both adults and children. (In schools, RULER works with the adults before taking it to students.) Permission to Feel is an inspiring book with a timely message, not only for each of us, but for the organizations and institutions that model how we are supposed to carry ourselves. —BB

2. Stay Woke

A Meditation Guide for the Rest of Us

Justin Michael WIlliams • Sounds True

Many “spiritual” writings give only incidental mention of the social and material struggles people face. They imply, “Inequality, marginalization? That’s an out-there problem. Ignore it and meditate.” Having reckoned with homophobia, personal trauma, and stress rooted in poverty and domestic violence, Justin Michael Williams has no time for that: “You need a different type of meditation. One that doesn’t pretend the struggle doesn’t exist.” He demonstrates real strength through the honesty and vulnerability of his first book. With “Freedom Meditation,” he offers you 10 steps to create a meditation (and life) practice that’s about fearlessly embracing all of who you are, to explore both your inner and outer worlds: “Meditation is not about relaxing. Meditation is about becoming more alive.”—AT

3. The Monkey Mind Meditation Deck

30 Fun Ways for Kids to Chill Out, Tune In, and Open Up

Carolyn Kanjuro • Shambhala

With exquisite illustrations by Alexander Vidal, this pack of 30 cards mixes many images: We find weather (rainbow, gentle breeze, hurricane), natural features (tree, mountain, rushing river), and anthropomorphized animals (cranky crab, burrowing bunny, loyal dog) on one side, and simple, playful meditation practices on the other side. The result is a stunning variety of short, insightful practices that can be, according to the accompanying guide, “a source of invention and play, a safe way to reflect on difficult topics, and a form of nourishment and support for children navigating an increasingly complex world.” The instructions are very clearly expressed, and (best of all) the teachings embodied here avoid the extreme earnestness that can ruin meditation for people of all ages. —BB

4. Mindful Movement in Psychotherapy

Paul Salmon • Guilford Press

How many movies or TV series have you seen depicting psychotherapy? Every time it’s the same scene. The therapist in a comfortable chair, their hands nested beneath their chin, listening intently or speaking wisely. Across from them sits the client on a chair or couch, usually a little more anxious. Salmon, a clinical psychologist teaching in the department of psychological and brain sciences at the University of Louisville, asks us: Is anything missing from this picture?

Movement. Because movement is, he says, traditionally “viewed as outside the realm of ‘talk therapy.’” Salmon—who is also a certified exercise physiologist, registered yoga teacher, personal trainer, and mindfulness teacher—encourages clinicians to consider incorporating “purposeful, mindful movement” in their interventions. He is not talking simply about exercise but about movement infused with awareness of what’s going on in body and mind, which can “provide a way to rekindle appreciation for our ability to move and be physically active.” Moving, he emphasizes, is baked into our DNA, but our lifestyles have greatly reduced it. Physical activity itself can create tangible experience that helps us be more than sedentary bodies with overactive brains, providing “an anchor to moment-to-moment reality.”

Salmon leads off by offering five progressively more engaged ways to bring movement into therapy. He then defines mindful movement and makes a case for it, as well as reviewing how mindful movement is used in existing clinical programs. From there,Salmon offers practical applications, first in a general way, and then for various kinds of conditions, such as anxiety, depression, PTSD, eating disorders, and addiction. There are also 29 audio guided practices that purchasers of the book can use personally or with clients. —BB

5. Keep Calm and Log On: Your Handbook for Surviving the Digital Revolution

Gillian “Gus” Andrews, EdD • The MIT Press

This handbook is crammed with practical information, from understanding bias to figuring out who owns a particular website. Andrews points out that the digital revolution—with its promise of connecting us all, extending access, and generally spreading more fun—often makes us feel more disconnected and proliferates disinformation. Her book is for those of us who feel “bad at” technology, addicted to it, or at a loss for how best to navigate a world dominated by it. She addresses FAQs around privacy, online etiquette, critical thinking, intimate online relationships, and more. Worksheets, practices, advice, and resources for further reading make this guide valuable for anyone who wants to better understand one of the defining revolutions of our time. —SD

6. Well Nourished: Mindful Practices to Heal Your Relationship with Food, Feed Your Whole Self, and End Overeating

Andrea Lieberstein, MPH, RDN • Fair Winds

This step-wise approach to healing our relationships with food offers worksheets, charts, graphs, prompts, and practices to lead readers through an inventory of how, what, and why we eat and overeat. Lieberstein outlines what she calls our “eight bodies”: physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual, social, intellectual, and creative. A lack of nourishment of one or more of those bodies may lead us to overeat, Lieberstein writes. Subsequent chapters focus on each of those bodies—with research-based information about the importance of each to our well-being, along with tools for tapping into awareness, setting intentions, and making changes to better nourish each of our bodies. Well Nourished is a practical, compassionate, customizable approach to an issue that can feel insurmountable—we have to eat to survive, but failing to address our relationship with food and overeating can stunt our ability to thrive and live fully. —SD

7. Humankind

A Hopeful History

Rutger Bregman • Little, Brown, and Company

In 1971, professor Philip Zimbardo carried out the notorious Stanford Prison Experiment, wherein “a group of ordinary students morphed into monsters,” in the words of Rutger Bregman. In a pivotal chapter in Humankind, Bregman lumps this experiment together with Stanley Milgram’s 1961 study where subjects applied what they were told were electric shocks to people who answered questions incorrectly, and a full 65% of the subjects continued applying shocks up to the limit they were told to apply. To this pair, he adds studies of the “bystander effect” that came out of the 1964 murder of Kitty Genovese in New York, which occurred while many appeared to look on and do nothing.

Bregman brings this research up—after an earlier chapter on William Golding’s Lord of the Flies—to show us what has been marshaled to lead to the conclusion that we are, as one columnist put it after the Genovese incident, “a callous, chickenhearted and immoral people,” or as Golding wrote, “Man produces evil as a bee produces honey.”

Bregman gradually widens each frame to reveal bigger pictures. The Milgram and Zimbardo experiments suffered from the same disease as reality TV: The producers and directors are outside the picture hectoring and egging the participants on. Psychological research can’t be done this way anymore, and Zimbardo himself atoned by launching the Heroic Imagination Project. In the Genovese case, there were people who did something, but they were overlooked in the zeal to tell a sensational story.

This gets to the heart of what Bregman is about: Because people have done bad things, including some very shockingly bad things (see the Holocaust), we revert to a simplistic story of basic badness. Then, we design things based on that belief, leading to outcomes like mass incarceration. He’s asking us to consider what would happen if we started from a belief in people’s fundamental decency, for which we also have a great deal of evidence. Would we build a better world? —BB

8. You Belong: A Call for Connection

Sebene Selassie • HarperCollins

This debut from meditation teacher Sebene Selassie is a pure delight. Selassie’s style tells the reader: You belong in these pages, and her message tells us: You belong, period. Selassie pulls from science, ancient Indigenous wisdom, Buddhism, art, pop culture, friends’ anecdotes, and her own experience (as an Ethiopian-Eritrean child of immigrants, regularly the only Black kid in any group, three-time survivor of cancer, longtime meditator, and life-long seeker of ways to belong) to build a convincing argument: “The only thing human beings who breathe a breath have in common are birth, death, and belonging.” That belonging, Selassie notes, is tied to knowing and loving ourselves, but also to the idea that we are intrinsically linked. In the end, belonging is love. It belongs to us all—and we to it. —SD

9. Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom

Creating Physical and Emotional Health and Healing

Christiane Northrup, MD • Penguin Random House

This fifth edition of Christiane Northrup’s landmark handbook for women’s health, first published in 1996, has been updated for the #metoo generation. As with Northrup’s four earlier revised editions, this one offers updated treatment and research data, and updated thinking, too, from Northrup’s new stage in life: grandmother.

Northrup is still all about a holistic approach to women’s health, and that includes considering the culture in which women live. Northrup doubles down on her avowal that having internalized our bodies as a problem is at the heart of women’s health, and that sexual trauma and abuse play out in our physical body. She notes that as the tide seems to be turning for sexual assault and harassment, so too must the tide turn for healthcare. This book will be for any woman who missed it the first time around—it’s comprehensively dedicated to women’s health, from the role of the patriarchy in women’s health care to understanding menopause, and includes a 12-step program for flourishing. —SD

10. Don’t Tell Me to Relax

Emotional Resilience In the Age of Rage, Feels & Freak-Outs

Ralph De La Rosa • Shambhala

Spiritual bypassing, a term first coined in psychology, refers to misusing spirituality or wisdom teachings by zeroing in on their “feel-good” aspects, while minimizing the reality of pain (our own, as well as others’). But is the only alternative to feel paralyzed by raging despair?

Don’t Tell Me to Relax, De La Rosa’s second book, arrives at the perfect time to inform a growing cultural awareness that neither approach will get us very far. “May we never forget: Often the deepest truths are the ones that challenge us,” he writes.

Skillfully drawing on neurobiology, mindfulness teachings, and psychotherapy, De La Rosa acknowledges that suffering is caused by a multitude of factors: from the systemic, like racism, ableism, homophobia, and economic disempowerment, to the personal—dysfunctional upbringings, traumatic losses, physical and mental health struggles. Having faced some of these himself, he doesn’t negate their importance in our lives, nor claim we should just get over them. Instead he empowers us, through direct and insightful prose, to touch in with these parts of ourselves that hurt. The book’s focus is “on radical nonpathology, embedding it in an empowerment model: the truth that the inherent wisdom, clarity, and freedom of our deeper nature need not wait for anyone or anything else to come along.” Throughout, De La Rosa offers seemingly simple yet transformative practices to help us (re) discover our innate curiosity and introspection. When we don’t “relax” but instead deepen into awareness and compassion, we can channel our efforts in the direction of healing—both for ourselves and for our world. —AT

11. Thinking and Eating

Recipes to Nourish and Inspire

The School of Life

A cookbook unlike any other, Thinking and Eating explores “how the sensory realm can be deployed to help with the transmission of ideas. ” Food, like art, can inform us about how we should live. In the first section, a list of virtues—each paired with a single ingredient— accompanies delicious-sounding recipes. Hope is a lemon, for instance, maturity a fig. Subsequent sections offer recipes and menus for a variety of moods: when alone (I don’t like myself very much), with friends (Why do we keep talking about house prices?), and in relationships (How can I graciously withdraw from a sulk?). What’s not to love about a book that asserts, “the mushroom is an edible treatise on the oddity of existence”? Seconds for me, please.—SD

12. A Kingdom of Tender Colours

A Memoir of Comedy, Survival, and Love

Seth Greenland • Europa Editions

Screenwriter, playwright, and novelist Seth Greenland brings his considerable powers as a storyteller to bear on recounting the journey he and his family traveled after his diagnosis of stage 4 lymphoma at 37. With a baby daughter and another child on the way and a writing career in mid-stride, he faced the prospect of losing it all—possibly leaving his new family in dire straits. His in-laws sent him a letter: “We hope you make the most of the time you have left.”

And indeed he has, in the three decades following, as evidenced by the free flow of this narrative, which he was inspired to write during the worst days of his illness, vowing that should he survive he would write the kind of book he wished he could have read while going through the darkest of dark nights. Dark yes, but also funny, since shtick runs thick in his veins. Greenland was a writer and producer on HBO’s Big Love, a satiric treatment of Mormon polygamy, and that irreverence is in full flower here, as he describes grappling with the eternal questions and finding various cosmologies seriously lacking. As he talks to God and asks the divine to please not kill him, he can’t help but share that he’s pretty sure He doesn’t exist, reprimand Him for the inquisition and the holocaust, and throw in a few choice f-bombs to boot.

It’s not all fun and games. We are gripped and moved and intrigued, as he traverses chemotherapy and complications leading to near death; meditation, tai chi, and other mind-body approaches; topped off with far-out alternative treatments that would be inappropriate to mention in polite company. Along the way, his wife Susan takes up meditation to help herself and her kids, leaves her career as a lawyer, becomes the successful author of The Mindful Child, and founds a groundbreaking program of mindfulness for children. Even the darkest clouds hide silver linings. —BB

Cover image by Flatiron Books

13. Real Change

Mindfulness to Heal Ourselves and the World

Sharon Salzberg • Flatiron

Sharon Salzberg is one of the mindfulness field’s most beloved teachers and prolific authors, with multiple best-selling titles including Real Happiness and Love Your Enemies. In her most recent book, Real Change, Salzberg turns her considerable wisdom toward the now ever-present question of how we can show up and help the world from a place of compassion, without succumbing to rage or burning out.

You could be forgiven for assuming that someone with dozens of years practicing meditation and loving-kindness under her belt is too grounded and heart-centered to get upset about what’s in the news. Salzberg tells us that it does sometimes leave her “burdened, tired out”—adding that it’s completely human to feel overwhelmed sometimes and to want to turn away from it all. Yet, “The truth is,” she tells us, “meditation would not be as meaningful for me at this time in my life if it were just about me.” She describes our built-in tendency toward either fight, flight, or freeze in the face of the powerful emotions. Gently, gradually, we can shift out of these responses, through mindfulness and loving-kindness practices that help us learn “to cultivate a sense of agency, to understand that a range of responses is open to us… to have the space in the midst of adversity to recall our values, what we really care about—and to find support in our inner strength, and in one another,” she says.

Real Change journeys through many richly nuanced topics including how to transform the energy of anger and resentment, instead of getting lost in it; how to work with the bottomless pain of grief and trauma by tapping into our innate resilience; and how we can start to enact a shared vision of the world by making the choice to care and to take action. In the latter part of the book, Salzberg leads us into deeply insightful teachings on interconnectedness, bias, and our habitual, knee-jerk judgments toward both self and “other.” Each chapter ends with a mindfulness practice to help us further integrate our expanded view in each area.

Reading this book feels in some ways like entering a collage of wisdom—and real hope. Salzberg features many voices of courage and care, from feminist author bell hooks to survivors of the Marjorie Stoneman Douglas high school shooting, to researchers and experts in fields too numerous to name, including many from the contemplative sciences. Salzburg also draws connections from Buddhist psychology to augment our current scientific understanding of the mind and how significantly our minds create our world. A profound and timely offering, Real Change will resonate for years as a guidebook for creating heart-centered, mindful change in the midst of so much uncertainty. —AT

The 10 Best Mindfulness Books in 2022, According to Experts

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Mindfulness is a wellness practice that can boost feelings of happiness, resilience, and purpose.
We spoke to 3 psychologists for their best mindfulness book recommendations.
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It can be difficult to try and stay in the moment, acknowledge our negative emotions without letting them control us, and try to relax. This is why mindfulness can be a very important practice to implement in your life, and research has found that it's associated with both higher levels of happiness and a greater purpose in life.

With the plethora of self-help books out there, it can be tough to know where to start, especially if you're looking for mindfulness exercises that are rooted in science-based practices. That's why I reached out to psychotherapist Jennifer Coren, Wake Forest University's Assistant Professor in the Department of Counseling David A. Johnson, and clinical psychologist Allison Gilson to get their recommendations on books that can teach people about mindfulness, based on what they found helps for their clients.

Whether you're looking for effective ways to de-stress or want to just learn more about the science behind mindfulness, these books can be a calming read. If anything, they can help you carve out space for yourself and focus on one thing at a time – which are major mindfulness skills themselves.

The 10 best mindfulness books, according to experts:

'Wherever You Go, There You Are' by Jon Kabat-Zinn

Amazon

Whether you're new to mindfulness or need a refresher, this book is an excellent primer of how you can apply mindfulness to your life to help you feel more present as you go through your day. "Kabat-Zinn is well known in the modern-day mindfulness world, as he is viewed as the mindfulness guru and founder of what we know to be mindfulness today," Coren says. "His book explores the core value of concentration, and that can help any beginner along their journey."

$9.71 from Amazon

$17.00 $15.64 from Bookshop

'The Miracle of Mindfulness' by Thich Nhat Hanh

Amazon

While washing your dishes may be a mundane task for many, Hanh guides the reader through how small moments like these are perfect times to be more aware of what's going on around you. "This text is a great introduction to mindfulness," Johnson says. "Grounded in Buddhist teachings, Hanh explains mindfulness using everyday examples paired with pragmatic recommendations."

$10.99 from Amazon

$15.00 $13.80 from Bookshop

'Practicing Mindfulness' by Matthew Sockolov

Amazon

One great thing about mindfulness is that there is not just one way to practice it, and you may find which one works best for you in these 75 exercises. "A collection of 75 simple and brief exercises for practicing meditation, this book will give you a variety of practical ways to practice mindfulness and find the strategies that work for you," Gilson says. "Full of brief, 5- to 15-minute exercises, this book will help you build a sustainable mindfulness practice and tackle some of the common challenges, such as a wandering mind, that beginners often experience."

$12.79 from Amazon

$16.99 $15.63 from Bookshop

'Self-Compassion' by Kristin Neff

Bookshop

If you tend to be tough on yourself, this book offers action plans for how to deal with issues that may arise in our day-to-day lives, with a focus on being kinder to ourselves. "We all know we're harder on ourselves than we are on others, saying things we'd never say about other people," Gilson says. "In this book, you'll learn to notice and modify your self-critical thoughts, leaving you with more compassion for yourself and better able to treat yourself the way you treat your friends."

$16.99 $15.63 from Bookshop

$13.19 from Amazon

'Unf*ck Your Brain' by Faith G. Harper

Amazon

Starting something new can be difficult when we're in a bad mental state, but mindfulness may be what we need to address our anxious, depressive, and angry responses to triggers in our lives. "Dr. Faith dives into how to retrain your brain to respond in ways that are not problematic to your daily life," Coren says. "She helps her readers in understanding mindfulness techniques and the effective way to apply them to their lives."

$14.95 $13.75 from Bookshop

$13.46 from Amazon

'The Mindful Way Workbook' by John Teasdale, Mark Williams, and Zindel V. Segal

Amazon

If you're ready to embrace mindfulness but need a plan to get you started, this eight-week plan may be the extra kick that you need to get started. "It will teach you to observe the relationship between your thoughts and your emotions, and make shifts in your thinking to make you less vulnerable to emotional stress," Gilson said. "Broken up into an eight-week plan, the book introduces the basics of mindfulness, and walks you through practicing and reflecting on mindfulness exercises such as slow breathing and mindful self-compassion."

$24.95 $22.95 from Bookshop

$17.95 from Amazon

'How to be an Adult in Relationships' by David Richo

Amazon

Mindfulness practices can also be used to help improve our relationships with others, as outlined in this book by Richo. "Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, this book explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play an important role in our life, transitional times, and relationships," Coren says.

$17.95 $16.51 from Bookshop

$15.95 from Amazon

'Aware: The Science and Practice of Presence—The Groundbreaking Meditation Practice' by Daniel J. Siegel

Bookshop

For the skeptics who are interested in how this practice actually works, neuroscientist Siegal writes about the science underlying mindfulness meditation's effects in "Aware. " "[Siegal] explains how building focused attention and awareness can literally change how the neurons in our brain interact," Gilson says. "Slightly dense, this is a good book for the interested learner who is willing to take a bit more time to digest the sometimes technical but still useful information contained within."

$16.95 $15.59 from Bookshop

$4.99 from Amazon

'Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness' by Jon Kabat-Zinn

Amazon

"Full Catastrophe Living' is a great resource for anyone interested in applying mindfulness to their daily lives," Johnson says. By engaging in mindfulness, people's mental health may improve, and physical issues like chronic pain may as well. "It provides clear instructions on multiple mindfulness and meditation practices while also addressing how mindfulness can address physical and emotional pain, as well as everyday stressors such as time, work, and relationships," he added.

$13.99 from Amazon

'Altered Traits: Science Reveals How Meditation Changes Your Mind, Brain, and Body' by Daniel Goleman and Richard J. Davidson

Amazon

If you want to learn more about the history of mindfulness (as well as learn why some assumptions about it are false), this book is for you. "Altered traits is an accessible review of the science of mindfulness and the story of western scientists studying mindfulness," Johnson says. "Readers gain an understanding of not only how concepts grounded in Eastern spiritual practices became the focus of neuroscience, psychology, counseling, and medicine, but also an informed and realistic perspective of the benefits and limitations of mindfulness."

$19.47 from Amazon

$17.00 $15.64 from Bookshop

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Read online “Meditation and Mindfulness. 10 minutes a day that your thoughts will put in order ”, Andy Paddikomb - liters

Translator Ekaterina Militskaya

Editor Tamara Kazakova

Head of Project I. Seryogina

MILOVIDOVA

Computer proofing A. Fominov

Cover designer O. Belorus

Cover photo Shutterstock

* * *

Acknowledgments

I would like to thank many, many people for their help in the implementation of this project, however, my list rightfully tops the teachers with whom I was lucky to learn meditation in monasteries and training centers around the world. I could not have written this book if it were not for the lessons of these outstanding people who have absorbed all the best traditions of meditation. I would especially like to thank Donald Creedon for his support, kindness and many years of friendship that I highly value.

I would like to thank my editor, Hannah Black, and the entire Hodder & Stoughton team for making this book such an enjoyable experience. Special thanks to Anthony Topping of the Greene and Heaton Literary Agency, Rich Pearson and Maria Schoenfeld of The Meditation for their critical review of the first, still rough versions of this work and their many helpful comments. In addition, I am grateful to Nick Begley for his invaluable contributions to the research sections of this book.

Thank you, Ian Pearson, Misha Abramov and Markus Cooper, for their generous and unselfish support to the Meditation Project. On behalf of all participants in the project, I express my eternal gratitude to you.

Last but not least, I would like to thank my family and friends for their enthusiastic support of this book and the Meditation project in general. I am especially grateful to my friend Lucinda Insall-Jones for her love, patience and unwavering faith in everything I do. For me, this is the most important thing in the world.

Introduction

It was well after midnight. I sat on the wall and looked down. Tall pine trees reliably hid me in the dark, but I could not resist the temptation and looked around again: was the chase following me? Why did it happen? I glanced down again. It was four meters from the ground. It wasn't too high, but I, crouched against the wall in pajamas and light sandals, shuddered at the thought of jumping. Why did I just put on those sandals? I wrapped them in trouser cuffs as I crept around the monastery, trying not to wake the other monks. I came to the monastery to contemplate life, and now I'm wiping my pants on this wall and contemplating my own sandals, preparing to jump back into the world.

I didn't think it would turn out like this. I have lived the life of a Buddhist monk before, and under much harsher conditions. But other monasteries seemed to radiate warmth, kindness and participation, and life there was, albeit difficult, but filled with meaning. This monastery turned out to be completely different - perhaps the only one of its kind. Locked up day and night, surrounded by high stone walls, with no contact with the outside world, at times I felt like I was in a prison. Of course, I had only myself to blame: after all, I got there of my own free will. Nevertheless, monasticism is different from the mafia: becoming a monk, you are not obliged to remain one all your life, deprived of the right to exit. On the contrary, Buddhist monasteries are known for their tolerance and compassion. And now the very fact that I had to escape from one of them, overcoming a four-meter wall on the way to freedom, remained a mystery to me.

It all started a few years ago when I decided to go to Asia to become a monk. At that time I studied at the university, at the physical education department. This may seem like a turning point in my life, but in fact I made this decision quite lightly. True, my friends and relatives were much more worried than I was, maybe even afraid that everything was in order with my head, nevertheless they provided me with the necessary support. Everything was different at the university. After hearing this news from me, the course facilitator suggested that I go to the doctor for a cure for depression - in his opinion, this would bring me much more benefit. He certainly wished me well, but it seemed to me that he did not understand me at all. Did he really think that the happiness and meaning of life that I longed to find were found in a bottle of pills? As I turned to leave, he said, “Andy, you will regret this decision for the rest of your life!” However, it turned out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life.

You must be wondering what you need to be in order to one day go to Asia and become a Buddhist monk. Perhaps you imagine a deranged student prone to self-medication, or a creative person rebelling against the consumer society. In reality, everything was much simpler. I just fought with myself. No, don't think that I'm crazy: I was just overwhelmed by different thoughts. My mind was spinning, switching from one mode to another, like a washing machine. Some thoughts gave me pleasure. Others didn't like it at all. The same thing happened with feelings. Not only did my brain not give me rest, but at times I was overcome by melancholy, anxiety, despair. In general, the most ordinary feelings, but sometimes it was impossible to control them. And there was nothing I could do about it. It seemed to me that they were controlling me and carrying me to no one knows where. There were good days when everything was fine, but there were also bad days when it seemed to me that my head was about to explode.

With such strong feelings, I tried to learn how to control my mind. I had no idea how it was done, but at a young age I tried meditation and realized that this was a possible solution to problems. Do not think that I was some kind of child prodigy, sitting on the floor in the lotus position from adolescence: no, it was completely different. I really turned to the art of meditation only at the age of 22, but the first experience of controlling my own consciousness at the age of eleven served as a kind of guiding star. Of course, I would like to state that I signed up for the first meditation courses in my life, seeking to understand the meaning of life, but in reality I was trying to get away from loneliness. My parents had just divorced, and to deal with it, my mother signed up for a six-week course. Upon learning that my sister was also going with her, I asked to join them in the company.

I guess I just got lucky with this first try. I didn’t expect anything special, and therefore I didn’t hope for anything and I wasn’t afraid of anything. Even at this age, a person cannot fail to notice the changes in consciousness that meditation can give. I'm not sure that my mind has ever been at rest before this incident. I have never been able to sit quietly in one place for a long time. Alas, the main problem was that the next time I tried to relive this state, I experienced complete disappointment. The harder I tried to relax, the less relaxed I felt. This is how my introduction to meditation began: in a struggle with my own mind and a feeling of ever-growing frustration.

Today, looking back, I clearly understand that there is nothing to be surprised about. The approach I was taught was, so to speak, too radical. The explanation was more in the language of the 1960s than the 1980s; so many unfamiliar words sounded in the classroom that sometimes I simply simply disconnected from what was happening. In addition, we were constantly reminded to "just relax" and "just go with the flow." Yes, if I could "just relax" and "just go with the flow", I would not need these courses. But you also had to sit for 30-40 minutes in a row - an unthinkable thing.

Such an experience could turn me away from meditation for the rest of my life. Plus, you don't have to wait for support. The sister considered the idea boring and soon abandoned classes. Mom, burdened with many worries, unsuccessfully tried to find time for practice. As for the support from my friends ... I don’t know what I was thinking, blurting out for some reason about my studies to a couple of classmates. The next morning, when I entered the classroom, I saw three dozen students sitting on their desks, cross-legged, and buzzing "om-mm-mm", barely suppressing chuckles. Now it seems funny - but then I was offended to the core. Of course, I didn’t tell anyone about this again and soon quit classes. Besides, when girls, sports, and booze that is forbidden for your age appear in the life of a boy, it’s damn hard to find time for meditation.

Don't think that I grew up in an environment conducive to meditation. Perhaps you imagine me as some kind of outcast, reeking of marijuana, in flared jeans, with long ponytail hair, or imagine that my parents came to pick me up after school in a bulky Volkswagen, painted with flowers on both sides. I mention this because I clearly understand that when it comes to meditation, it is easy to jump to conclusions, to fall under the influence of stereotypes that convince us that meditation is only suitable for a certain type of person. In fact, as a teenager, I was just as ordinary a guy as any of you.

So I dabbled in meditation until, at the age of 18, I experienced a series of tragic events, to which I will return later, and which gave such importance and significance to my meditation practice. Grief is hard to deal with at any age. We are not taught this; there are no generally accepted recipes for helping us get through suffering, so everyone copes with them to the best of their own ability. I managed to do the only thing that was in my power - to drive all my feelings deeper, hoping that the feeling of longing and loss, uninvited guests who stood on my doorstep, would never return to me again.

However, as always happens, the more you strain, the stronger the resistance. At some point, this tension inevitably breaks out. Two years flew by like one moment, and now I'm studying at the university. After the first course, it was hard for me to imagine what else one could expect from life. But soon the accumulated tension, feelings that I ignored, began to break out. At first it felt like some kind of inconvenience, but very soon they affected all aspects of my life. Meeting the course facilitator and being informed that I had decided to leave my studies and become a monk was the weakest of my experiences.

I was brought up in the Christian faith, but by adolescence I did not feel a spiritual connection with any of the religions. Later, I read several books on the philosophy and psychology of Buddhism, and a close friend of mine liked to talk about it. I think Buddhism came to my liking precisely because it was not perceived as a religion. And stories about meditations, about monks who knew how to control their own mind and feelings, sounded very tempting - not in terms of lifestyle, but in terms of results. When I am asked about how I became a monk, the question is usually formulated something like this: “So what, you just took it and climbed the mountain, knocked on the gate and asked to be a monk, right?” It sounds silly, of course, but yes, that's exactly what happened. However, before you enthusiastically pack your bags, realize that the reality is a bit more complicated. First, you undergo training as a novice for several years, then a full course of study as a novice monk, and only after that, with the permission of the teacher, you receive the status of a real monk (or nun). At first, in an impatient quest to find a true teacher, I kept changing monasteries and countries. I managed to live in India, Nepal, Thailand, Burma, Russia, Poland, Australia and Scotland, traveled to many other countries, everywhere mastering new techniques, accumulating new knowledge, and tried to apply them to the best of my ability in my own life. With the exception of the very walled fortress from which I was just about to jump, all the places I had visited so far turned out to be hospitable and friendly, and the conditions for study were exceptionally favorable. And, fortunately, I still found my teacher - or rather, as it turned out, a group of teachers.

The life of a monk is tricky. Not everyone is able to adequately perceive the "bald man wrapped in a rag" who is trying to clarify the essence of meditation to a lay audience - which, in fact, I did. Similarly, it is easy to confuse people's minds. It is one thing to live in seclusion or in a monastery among monks for whom the simplicity of monastic robes is natural, and another thing to be a monk in a city. When I tell people about the benefits of meditation, I find that many of them are desperately looking for a way to relax, but they are confused by the religious element, which is inevitable at the sight of monastic robes. They needed a way to cope with everyday stresses - at work, in their personal lives, in their own minds. They wanted to return the direct perception of life inherent in childhood, a sense of the joy of being. They did not need any spiritual revelations, much less psychotherapy. They just wanted to know how to switch when returning home from work, how to fall asleep peacefully at night, improve relationships with loved ones, feel less anxiety, sadness, anger. They sought to control their desires, get rid of addictions, see new perspectives. But most of all, they sought to cope with a feeling of subconscious dissatisfaction with the fact that everything is not going quite as it could, as it should, the feeling that life should be arranged somehow differently. I wanted to connect meditation with everyday life, and for this I made the decision to abandon monasticism and live in the world.

Being a monk made me extremely shy. This was partly due to the closed way of life, but also the realization of the helplessness of my own mind, because of which I felt as if naked, too vulnerable, and the desire to get rid of this feeling did not go away. In addition, I was depressed by the lack of physical activity. Before the beginning of the monastic epic, I devoted a lot of time to physical exercises - and suddenly it turned out that I had not returned to them for, consider, a dozen years. Once I was talking with a friend who, during the conversation, mentioned her classmate, who at that time worked in the Moscow circus. She remembered that at one time I was fond of juggling and gymnastics, and therefore decided that it would be interesting for me. Soon I was taking private lessons, which brought me a lot of joy. During one of them, the coach asked me if I knew that at the University of London you can get a diploma in the field of circus arts. Yes, yes, no kidding: a university degree in circus acting! I made some inquiries and it turned out to be true. At the same time, the competition turned out to be very high, which, however, is not surprising: who wants to study nuclear physics when you can spin on a trapeze all day like a monkey? So theoretically my chances were not too high. Nevertheless, one fine evening I received a letter saying that I could start studying - but under special conditions. Actually, there was only one condition - I had to sign a document where, in streamlined language, it was said that, being already an elderly person, I was at high risk of injury and, in which case, I was ready to take full responsibility. "Not young" at 32 - who would have thought?

Of course, the transition from monks to clowns may seem quite unexpected. Nevertheless, representatives of these professions have much more in common than it might seem at first glance. The ability to concentrate in any physical activity proved to be an invaluable acquisition - much more useful than I could have imagined. Any circus performance - juggling, tightrope walking, acrobatics on a trapeze - requires a precisely calibrated balance of concentration and relaxation. If you try too hard, you will definitely make a mistake. If you relax, you will definitely fall.

One of the most difficult aspects of being in the circus was the constant pressure to step outside of your personal comfort zone; most of us have to do this all the time. Our own egos suffered greatly, so we were forced to take ourselves a little less seriously. It's funny, but in many ways it reminded me of monastic training, during which our "I" was also subjected to serious tests. At clowning seminars (I still can't say this phrase with a serious expression on my face) we were forced to play idiots, take risks, experiment, being ready to lose. We were sent to the stage without any material and instructions. At such moments, there was silence - and there was nowhere to run. If someone thought too long, the teacher would beat the drum - this was a sign that the attempt was over, and you were sent away from the stage. There was no hiding place, a place where one could think and invent a witty joke. It required a direct presence, a cruel need to give something right on the spot - and see what happens. Sometimes I was overcome with inspiration, and this enthusiastic excitement was unforgettable. At other times the attempts were painful and the results humiliating. But feelings were not the main thing. The main thing was to go out and do it, without thinking or caring about what others would think, without striving for a specific result - just do it, that's all.

In life, we often get so bogged down in endless calculations, sorting through all possible outcomes, that as a result we lose our chance. Of course, sometimes careful reflection is necessary, but the more we get used to the present, the more we feel the right choice. Consider it a flair, inspiration, a revelation from above, or simply an inner feeling of the right path - this is accompanied by an incredible feeling of discovering freedom in oneself.

How to master consciousness?

I have long dreamed of teaching people meditation. I wanted to pass on to others the ability to appreciate the details - something that my teachers taught me. When I watched how meditation is sometimes taught here in Britain, I did not understand how one could get even a grain of benefit from these classes. The monks, the bearers of the spiritual tradition, transferred the eastern experience of meditation to the western soil carefully and sensitively, but in lay life this was done in a hurry. It seemed that we needed to immediately, this minute achieve peace in our own minds. The technique of meditation was taught haphazardly, out of context, so that it was almost impossible to master it. Try to count how many of your friends, having started to learn the basics of meditation, soon gave up this lesson? And how many of those who did not even try to contact her, believing that they could not do it? There are certainly many more of these. But, on the other hand, how to master meditation without understanding its essence, without proper training and guidance?

It will soon become clear to you that meditation is by no means limited to daily sitting for some time in a certain posture.

Posture may be important, but not the only condition, and is included in a more complex system of consciousness training, in which three aspects are clearly distinguished. Each of them is equally important, and to get a decent result, you need to study all three. Traditionally, those who learn meditation first learn the techniques themselves, then learn how to put them into practice, and only then learn how to use the experience in everyday life.

The Headspace project was officially launched in 2010. I intended to teach people meditation precisely as part of a general system of work on oneself. The idea was simple: to remove the veil of mystery from meditation, to make it accessible and practical for real life. No eccentric frenzy - only tools that a person can use to clean up his own mind. In addition, I wanted as many people as possible not to read about meditation, but to master it in practice. I'm sure there will come a time when sitting quietly for ten minutes to get your thoughts in order will become as useful a habit as a daily walk. Ten or fifteen years ago, the word “yoga” caused a smirk, and today doing yoga in a fitness club is no more strange than aerobics (maybe even less strange).

The project took years of research, planning, and development, but compared to the history of meditation, it is only a blink of an eye. Meditation practices have been passed down from teacher to student for thousands of years. This time is more than enough to develop, improve as much as possible and even bring the methodology to perfection. In a world where fashion rules the show, dictating new hobbies to us - as bizarre as they are momentary - such authenticity seems to be the truth that inspires hope. It was this authenticity that allowed me to start working with medical professionals to adapt meditation techniques for healing purposes. It was she who gave me the opportunity to work as a clinical consultant on self-awareness, helping patients suffering from a variety of disorders - from insomnia to impotence.

But back to me sitting on the high fence. I looked back one last time and jumped. It was a pity to leave the monastery like this, however, remembering this, I do not regret that I ended up there. I have learned the lessons of every monastery, orphanage, meditation school I have ever been to. For many years I have had the happiness and pleasure of learning from amazing teachers, exemplary meditation masters in the fullest sense of the word. If there is anything reasonable in these pages, I am entirely indebted to my spiritual teachers. From my point of view, I have earned the right to write this book mainly due to the fact that along the way of mastering meditation I made, perhaps, all possible mistakes and I hope that my experience will save you from them. In other words, I will try to explain how to approach meditation, how to practice it, and how to effectively connect it with everyday life. After all, it is one thing to navigate the map, and another thing is to meet a person who will show the way.

Readings on Mindfulness and Meditation

At every meeting, class and workshop, I am asked what to read about mindfulness and the scientific approach to meditation. Many good books have already been published in Russian, so here is my list. It is divided into two sections, near-scientific and near-Buddhist.

References are in titles.

The ones with pictures seem great to me just to start with. Further on the list are several more equally beautiful ones, in addition.

Non-fiction books on mindfulness and neurophysiology

Mindsite. The New Science of Personal Transformation
Daniel Siegel

Siegel talks about three things here: he explains the basic neurophysiology of mindfulness on the fingers (in the truest sense of the word), gives a psychological justification for this practice using examples from personal therapy practice, and explains the mindsight method itself - the ability to observe the contents of your own mind, understanding what exactly is happening there at every moment, and not getting involved.

One of the most beautiful themes of the book is the “river of integration”, where Siegel talks about 8 types of integration processes in the brain and nervous system, you can read this fragment here (pdf).

Buddha's Brain: The Neuropsychology of Happiness, Love and Wisdom
Rick Hanson, Richard Mendius

One of the earliest books on the neurophysiology of meditation published in Russian. Hanson develops an approach he calls "positive neuroplasticity" and basically says that by changing the brain, we change life. The brain is changing all the time, but we can control it to a certain extent, direct this process in a positive direction. For each topic - rendered in a separate chapter - the authors provide abundant scientific grounds. In general, this is a classic of sci-fi meditation.

Focus. On Attention, Distraction, and Success in Life
Daniel Goleman

An excellent book from the author of the super-bestselling book Emotional Intelligence. Actually, the book "Emotional Intelligence" is also a textbook on the practice of mindfulness, about one of its facets - how to understand and recognize your emotions, and how to regulate yourself with all this. And in the book "Focus", as you might guess, Goleman reveals the topic of another facet of awareness - the power of concentration. I am very close to understanding mindfulness as a set of the most fundamental skills for life, and this point of view is being offered here.

Awareness. Finding Harmony in Our Mad World
Mark Williams, Danny Penman

The now classic book that best describes the MBSR approach, the eight-week mindfulness-based stress reduction protocol. It gives all the necessary scientific justification, links to many studies, and a specific eight-week practice program that you can simply take and do. Convenient, practical, scientifically sound. Must-read.

Conscious meditation. A Practical Guide to Pain and Stress Relief
Vidyamala Birch, Denny Penman

This is the same eight-week MBSR protocol, but applied directly to chronic pain and physical discomfort. For me, this is a very relevant topic, and below I give a link to a “near-Buddhist” book by the American meditation teacher Shinzen Yang in my translation - also about working with pain. In total, in Russian, there are so far these two books on this topic. Here is a short snippet (pdf) from Birch and Penman's book to give it a taste.

Additional list without pictures

Attentive brain. A Scientific Perspective on Meditation
Daniel Siegel

Changed character traits. How Meditation Changes Your Mind, Brain and Body
Daniel Goleman, Richard Davidson

One of the most recent books in the post-hype era, in which two leading scientists in the field of the impact of meditation on human life talk about the history of scientific research from the 60s to the present day, and summarize important preliminary results What practices work? What about meditation is true, and what is a stretch or an outright lie? What in this area can really be said "scientists have proven"?

Mindfulness
Ellen Langer

Near-Buddhist books on mindfulness and meditation

There is a huge list here. Masters of contemplative (of course, not only Buddhist) practices have been cultivating the skills of awareness, wisdom and compassion for many millennia, so there is a lot of interesting literature, including those translated into Russian.

In order not to turn the list into a bibliography of all the literature available on this topic, I quote a few according to the following criteria: although they were written by Buddhist teachers, one does not need to have any training to understand these books, one does not need to be Buddhists, but the explanations contained in them, methods and instructions are not religious.

In other words, these are books for everyone, understandable and profound.

Buddha, the brain and the neurophysiology of happiness. How to change life for the better
Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche

Bestseller from the most famous lama of the younger generation of Tibetan teachers. Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche is known for his brain research, which has earned him the title of "the happiest person in the world."

The uniqueness of Mingyur is that, on the one hand, he is an experienced practitioner with more than 60,000 hours of meditation behind him, and on the other hand, he is well acquainted with the Western mindset and modern science, and knows how to speak about the most complex things in a simple and human language.

A path with a heart. Guide to the Perils and Hopes of the Spiritual Life
Jack Kornfield

If I am told it is time to go to a desert island and there is only one book on the subject, I will take The Way with Heart. This is really incredibly heartfelt text, and at the same time very practical and specific. Here is a fragment from the book - the seventh chapter in its entirety (pdf) - with a detailed story about the naming (labeling) technique in working with complex emotions. One can appreciate the practicality, style, beauty, and depth of Kornfield's text.

Wherever you go, you are already there. Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life
Jon Kabat-Zinn

Arguably the best book on meditation and mindfulness from the classic of modern mindfulness, who is so often (inappropriately!) accused of inventing "Buddhism for managers" and emasculating the content of this religion teaching people how to hammer nails with a microscope. If you read this book, you will see for yourself how groundless such accusations are, and the understanding of Kabat-Zinn is deep and extensive.

The Four Foundations of Mindfulness in Simple Words
Bhante Henepola Gunaratana

The most Buddhist book on this list, The Four Foundations of Mindfulness is a good guide to early Buddhism and the words of the Buddha. The Four Foundations of Mindfulness - satipatthana - is indeed where the modern mindfulness practice came from. The book contains a wonderful modern transcription from a well-known author, very clear and precise.

Natural Pain Relief: How to Relieve and Dissolve Physical Pain Through the Practice of Meditation
Shinzen Young

The secular list above already has a book about working with pain, but this one offers its own beautiful and extremely detailed look at the topic, including specific algorithms (pdf) of practice. In addition, this is the only book of my meditation teacher published in Russian, in my translation. How can I not include her in the list?! But seriously, the information it contains can significantly affect the quality of life of any person, and especially those suffering from chronic pain.

Additional list without pictures

Joyful Wisdom
Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche

The second excellent book by Mingyur Rinpoche, which could easily have been the first on this list.

Loving kindness in simple words. The Practice of Metta
Bhante Henepola Gunaratana